Original subtitles

I'm seeing things.

Stop!

I'm hearing things. Things that aren't there.

Maybe they are there and they just seem unreal.

I needed to be alone.

I'd like to stay. Keep you company.

She wanted me! And that's why you did what you did!

The way I see it, son, you killed her.

If you trust this man,

sometimes trust requires us not to have all the answers.

Holy shit.

You don't have to be the Russian River Killer anymore.

Open your eyes.

I can be.

I turn myself in.

A full confession.

Now about your plan, taking credit for the RRK murders...

Except you can't turn yourself in, John.

For it to work...

for it to really work...

you're gonna have to die.

I am the RRK.

I am the RRK.

- I've changed my mind. - No, no, John, it's too late.

You are the RRK.

And RRK is dead.

It's him.

Wound, blade, incision, all match.

Although if you see the pink coloration on the edge of her livor mortis,

she was most likely refrigerated for a short period of time.

That's an inconsistency.

But what if the RRK wasn't dead?

We've been over this, John.

- You're right, I know, but... - Hey, hey, you're just scared.

That's all, okay? But we made the video. I gave you all those details to say, intimate details.

And now that e-mail is timed to go out to law enforcement.

- To Mike Serrato. - I can stop it.

Or I can let it, as planned, and I walk through the door and they arrest me.

I just let them arrest me. I never say a word. I go silent.

- They can't force me to talk. - But you will.

John, it's human nature that you'll make a mistake.

You'll say the wrong thing to the wrong person and they'll figure it out.

Similar to vic one, three, seven and eight,

two sets of wounds to the neck.

Hands from the front.

An arm, most likely from behind.

The assumption being that...

they get away

and he has to finish the job.

Or perhaps he lets them get away...

and then chases them down again.

I swear to you

that I will always be grateful to you for doing this for me.

For doing this for my family.

I'm gonna need you to do something for me, Leo.

- Anything. - I need you to push me.

That wasn't the deal. I'm not gonna push you.

But I'm asking you to. I want you to. Killing me should be easy.

No, you don't get it, killing is never easy. Killing is the last thing I wanna do.

I will rot in hell because of what I've done, because of who I am, I know that.

But until then, I wanna be a better man.

We gotta go.

I've got a staff meeting at 4.

I'm sorry.

I'm so sorry.

I am so sorry, truly I am, but I can't do it.

I can't give you that chance like I promised I would.

Can you forgive me?

Forgiven.

I promised Paxton I wouldn't tell anyone.

But this guy has a totally whacked out RRK shrine.

I have to tell somebody.

- It's the right thing. - And what about Dad?

- He has to know that this guy-- - Is what, demented?

John Ainsworth almost ruined Dad's life.

Have you forgotten how many letters he wrote Dad saying he was the RRK?

But he wasn't, Sammy.

And while I'm giving out rare but precious sisterly advice,

this Paxton kid sounds like a complete loser.

I think it's time you shut him down and found some way better friends.

I could come with you.

That's not necessary.

Make sure Dr. Weiss checks your cortisol levels and, you know what, have them do an EKG.

You know Dr. Weiss, you know how thorough he is.

- He's too thorough. - Mm.

Well, just promise me you won't soft-pedal things, Mike.

Be honest with him. He should do a CAT Scan also.

- Yeah. I'll mention it. Sorry. - Mm-hm.

- Thanks for not fighting me on this. - I'm fine, Paige.

- I'm not having a nervous breakdown. - I never said that.

- All right, I'll call you later. - All right. Girls, breakfast!

- Wait, is that a...? - The heartbeat?

- Yeah. - Yes.

Wow.

I'll let you get dressed...

and I'll see you back here in a few weeks.

Thank you.

Are you all right?

Yeah. Yeah. I'm just happy.

I know you said you wanted this baby, that you were excited we were pregnant...

but I wasn't sure.

Oh...

Do you believe me now?

See, Candace...

everything has changed.

My mother, things with Arlen, it's made me realize how precious life is,

how important family is.

My mom is resting at peace.

I wanna find my own peace.

With you, with Pax, with our new baby girl.

- So you think it's a girl too? - I feel it.

- Hey, Mike. Come in. - Hi.

I assumed after last time you weren't into hypnotherapy.

I'm not. I'm, uh, interested in LSD therapy.

Well...

Uh...

LSD therapy can expand the mind and help someone--

Unlock an answer they know they have? Exactly.

I wish I could help you, but unfortunately I don't offer that kind of therapy.

You've been busted twice in the last three years.

Not once, but twice for offering LSD therapy.

And why? Because you know it works. You know it's effective.

And I know it ruined my life.

As I suspect this case is ruining yours.

That's none of your business, Colin. I thought we were friends.

Mike, what are you doing?

What are you doing to me?

It doesn't matter how I feel about LSD therapy, I can't go near the stuff.

- Two felonies are enough. - I lied to my wife to be here.

She thinks I'm out getting my annual physical!

Now, I just need you to help me drop acid so I can do my job.

I'm sorry, but I can't help you.

No, look, everything was fine, sweetheart. Yeah.

No, the blood work's gonna take a few days. Dr. Weiss, he wasn't concerned.

Yeah, he gave me a prescription for a mild benzodiazepine.

To take as needed.

Anyway, look, I'm at work. I'll, uh... Let's talk tonight. Bye.

Greetings, Moreno County Sheriff's Department.

Greetings, Detective Mike Serrato.

By the time you're watching this...

By the time you're watching this, I'll be dead.

- I'll be dead. Onto bigger and better things. - Onto bigger and better things.

Bigger and better things.

But let me leave you with some parting words, if I may.

I, John G. Ainsworth, am the Russian River Killer.

And, yes, I know I have said this before in many...

...sexual variety, I was a perfect gentleman here.

I simply removed her blouse,

a cute leopard-skin print chiffon number, so as not to get blood on it.

She was so cold.

She was shivering like a leaf, so I covered her with...

Bernadette Loomis, who somehow lost her shoes along the way.

And Rosie Flores, with her long, thin scar,

as if she'd had open heart surgery as a child...

You were right. He knows things only our guy would know.

- ...her nails that popped off. - You were right, Mike.

And, oh, of course, Nurse Valerie, who almost got away.

And Iris Swan, with her wine mess of a birthmark which you were so right, Detective Serrato,

was so much more than a lucky guess.

You should be reporting that this killer is dead and this community is safer,

not looking for a ways to disparage the difficult work this department does every day

to serve and protect.

But John Ainsworth was under your radar six years ago,

confessing in numerous letters to being the RRK.

We took those confessions seriously.

But as soon as we scratched the surface, it was clear fiction.

Only it wasn't.

If a criminal gives a blatantly inaccurate confession, that confession is meaningless.

What about the partial DNA profile you have from the Birdie Loomis murder?

Is there a match with Ainsworth?

No, but we've always been equivocal about the sample.

And clearly we had every reason to be.

And what about the close to $5 million the county paid to John Ainsworth

because of the behavior of one of your detectives?

We can talk about the mistakes of this department another time.

Today we should solely be focused on the end of the RRK...

with a confession...

You'll never catch him.

solid DNA evidence...

and this killer's body lying in our morgue.

But if an arrest had been made six years ago--

Does anyone have a question whose answer might serve the public?

- Mr. Serrato, sir. Mr. Serrato... - That's all for today. Thank you.

Mr. Serrato, do you feel vindicated

after finding out you were right about Ainsworth all along?

Anything at all?

You know, I knew that guy was wrong.

- The second I laid eyes on him. - Yep. You've made that point, Pax.

God, I wonder what they'll find buried in his backyard.

And in his house and garage.

Or what kind of twisted thing they'll find out about why he did what he did.

I mean, not that there's any good excuse for being a total psycho.

It's probably obvious and totally cliché,

like his mother dropped him on his head or his father diddled him--

Pax, enough.

Please.

I'm not feeling well. I'm gonna lie down.

You shouldn't feel bad.

- About what? - Being friends with a serial killer.

- You shouldn't feel bad. You didn't know. - I told you, I really...

I wasn't really friends with him, you know?

- Hey. - Hey.

It's gonna take some time.

For both of us.

It's gonna take some time to believe it...

to really trust that it's over.

Yeah, I know.

But maybe...

we can get away for a long weekend.

Just the two of us.

Sonoma or somewhere.

I'll check with work.

Right.

I'll get something planned.

I love you.

I love you too.

Call me...

- Candace. - I left you a message. I need to talk to you.

Uh...

Okay. I'm expecting a patient in a little bit.

But come in, we can schedule something.

No, now. I need to talk now.

- Okay. - It's about that serial killer.

He's our neighbor. John Ainsworth.

Wow.

I'm sure that news was a shock. I can understand why you would be upset.

That's not why I'm upset.

It's Leo.

I've thought the most hideous thing about him.

And I don't know why.

I didn't think I was that person anymore, that had to always think the worst.

That my husband...

was this killer.

What, the RRK?

And I don't know why the fuck I would think that, but it got in my head and I couldn't get it out.

Which makes me a despicable person because of course he's not a killer, he's not this monster.

He is the man I love.

Look, we are all capable of unreasonable, even horrible thoughts.

That is human nature.

But there must be a reason,

as irrational as it may be, that you would have thought that.

No, I just said that, I just said I don't know why the fuck I'd think that.

What are you thinking?

I... I am thinking a lot of things.

You're thinking about the night me and Leo met, aren't you?

Of course you are.

- I know it upset you last time-- - You don't believe me.

- Did you ever catch the guy who attacked you? - No.

Did you file a report?

- No. - Why not?

I just didn't.

- Because you deserved what happened to you? - I was a stripper.

- Candace, you didn't deserve that. - Okay, I didn't.

And fortunately, Leo saved me.

So you keep saying.

But then you believed he was capable of hurting people.

- But he didn't. He's not the RRK. - No, he's not.

But it really isn't about that.

Let it go, Paige.

Is that really fair, Candace?

I'm your therapist. Or I was.

And today you show up, without an appointment, and I still make time for you.

I trust him.

It's me I have to learn to trust more.

Let's get started.

So I've had a request from someone who would like to share first.

Hey. Thanks. Thanks for letting me go first.

Well, my mom...

was, uh, murdered.

By my father.

And...

And some of you may have heard that.

I always knew something bad happened...

and I blamed myself.

It, um...

It made me somebody...

that I hated.

Um...

It made me someone I didn't... I didn't wanna be.

But what happened to her wasn't...

Wasn't my f-- My fault.

And now that I understand that, now that I've forgiven myself...

uh, for what happened, started to anyway...

I wanna be someone who would make my mom proud.

I don't know if that's possible, but I hope. That's it.

This is Dr. Weiss's office calling for Michael Serrato,

following up on your missed appointment.

Please call us back at your earliest convenience to reschedule.

She thinks you're a bad influence. Dangerous too.

And that I should find better friends.

That I can find better friends.

Sorry, that sounds harsh, I know, but she cares about me.

In her own obnoxious and annoying way.

She doesn't want me to get in trouble. Doesn't want me to get hurt.

So do you wanna crash that stupid homecoming dance tonight?

- We could pull some blood-spilling Carrie shit. - Sure.

You mean "blood-spilling" metaphorically, right?

Do you?

Wow. Heh.

Well, that was, um, great. Heh.

I thought you said the other day that, um...

Are you feeling guilty?

Me? No. Not at all. Why should I?

Eileen left me weeks ago, so...

I'm sorry.

I'm not.

What about you?

Feeling guilty?

I, uh...

I made a decision and I acted on it.

Guilt would mean that I feel judged.

And I don't.

I should go.

Okay.

The night we met...

What about it?

We've never talked about it.

Of course we have.

No. Not really.

But I wanna talk about it now.

- Sorry, Cyd, I probably should've called. - Yeah, probably should've.

- Do you have company? - No. Taking a break from love.

Tired of getting your heart broken?

Tired of breaking them. Something to drink?

- Yeah, sure, I'll have a beer. - Uh... Heh. Beer is 5:00.

Tequila is 11:00, you at my door, calling me Cyd.

- I never called you Cyd, Ramos. - You called me Cyd.

- Chin-chin. - Salud.

Okay. The suspense is killing me.

I don't think it's him, Ainsworth. I don't think he's the RRK.

Okay, I get it. Hard to let go.

- No, that's not it. - Isn't it?

- This case has defined you. How long? - That's not it, Cyd!

There. You see?

You did it again. You called me Cyd.

Last count, 26 specific details from his confession

about either a victim or crime scene that wasn't public record.

His DNA all over Valerie Harold's body.

Iris Swan's tattoo in a fricking jar. A bat-shit crazy shrine that puts yours to shame.

And why was the body moved? Why was it kept cold?

And why was there so much DNA on Valerie's body?

Covered in it. When in the past, he'd always been so careful.

You can talk yourself into anything, Mike. You have talked yourself into anything.

Why not this time just accept the evidence and be happy?

And why did he tell me that I'd never catch him?

As in, "You'll never catch him."

Not "You'll never catch me." "You'll never catch him."

What are you talking about?

It isn't him.

Honey, the night we met...

- What happened to you, I know it was difficult. - That's why I wanna talk about it.

But why bring up painful memories?

I remember leaving the club.

I remember walking to my car.

Looking for my keys.

And then... And then I was attacked.

The next thing I remember...

I woke up.

I felt drugged.

I saw someone.

Why are you doing this?

- Huh? Why are you putting yourself through this? - Because I wanna remember.

I wanna know what happened to me. Who it was that attacked me.

Did you see him?

Mm-mm.

Or was it you?

You saved me. I... That I remember.

But was it you who attacked me?

Wake up.

Wake up. Hey.

Hey.

Hey.

Open your eyes.

Come on.

Don't... Don't die, please. Come on. That's it.

You're okay.

That's it. Yeah, yeah. You're okay.

You're okay. It's okay.

It's okay.

It's okay.

Hey.

Hey.

You're okay.

You're okay.

It's okay.

Candace.

I'm sorry, baby.

Hey.

Hey, Candace...

Honey, I know...

I know I hurt you.

Baby, you said I saved you.

But you're the one who saved me.

I was the one who needed saving that night and you were there.

You know that. You've always known that, I know you have.

Please, Candace, don't leave me.

Please. Please. My God.

I can't lose this.

I can't lose any of this.

Come on. Stop.

Candace, I need you more than ever. I do.

Baby, you don't understand.

You don't understand. Please, Candace. Please!

Candace!

No.

What do you take me for, a drug dealer?

I'm not here as a cop.

I'm just looking to buy some LSD like any other paying customer.

Heh. Not the point.

Point is, I don't trade in ugly synthetic pharmaceuticals.

How sweet, Rooster.

- A pedophile with a moral code. - Damn straight.

We all have our, uh, contradictions.

Not the first cop who's shown up at my door looking to expand his mind.

Colorado toad venom.

Secreted from the parotid gland.

Powerful, natural hallucinogenic.

And, what, you snort it?

Ooh! You could. Heh.

Cheeky little fella.

Yeah.

I mean, it is the most direct pathway to the brain.

But you eat it, and it gets metabolized by the liver.

And that metabolite skips past the blood-brain barrier

with a sneaky efficiency

that provides a much more intense high.

If that's what you're looking for.

No. Fuck. Damn!

I know that I don't have a right to ask you to even understand.

But please, please don't leave me like this.

I need you, honey.

Candace! What are you doing?

Holy shit!

- Go back inside. - Did you call the fire department?

- Okay, I'm calling 911. - No.

Not yet.

Who are you?

Wake up.

Not now, Mikey.

Not now.

Well. Well, this is a surprise.

You all right?

Yeah, I'm fine.

You wanna come in?

No, I... I can't stay.

I just wanted to see how you were doing after everything.

Well, I'm better.

I mean, I'm disappointed I don't get a chance to face him in court and say, "Rot in hell."

But the fact that he's there already works for me.

I should go.

Hey, Mike, you know what? I...

I got some friendly advice for you.

Give her some space.

- Who? - Tori McGrath.

Linda, it's not like that.

I know, you're just looking in on her and helping out and it's nice.

But you can't save her from her grief.

It's hers.

As hard as you try, you can't.

Just like you couldn't save the rest of us.

Good morning, Detective Serrato.

- Mike. - Mike.

I owe you an apology.

What for?

Well, when we spoke at church last time about my mother, I had some harsh words for you.

Uh, no need for apology. I know it's a challenging time.

I should be the one apologizing to you.

I just wanted to do right by your mother.

Sometimes in my pursuit of what's right, justice for the dead,

I'm not always as sensitive as I should be to the living.

Listen, apology accepted.

Truth is, I, uh... I understand, Leo.

Now, my mother didn't literally disappear. Nothing that tragic.

See, when I was young, my sister,

she died of leukemia, and, uh...

And the pain of that nearly killed my mother.

And the more that I would reach out to her, the further away she pulled.

Because the only thing that ever brought her back to life was physical intimacy.

First with my father, and then after he left...

with other men who would come around.

You must be wondering why

- I'm telling you this story. - Heh, heh.

No, no, it's...

We don't know each other that well.

But it was...

I was reminded of it by something your father said.

You wanted to save your mother.

Uh--

"Tried to." I think that's how he put it.

So as I said, I understand. I...

Just wanting to...

Wanting to save the person you love the most.

Uh, listen, my family's waiting for me, so... Yeah.

Still trying to save her, aren't you?

And yet they're all dead.

Excuse me?

I know who you are, Leo Doyle.

I know it's you.