Original subtitles

Bless me, Father, for I have sinned.

I've struggled for so long...

to be the man I wanna be, but I keep failing.

What I do...

who I am...

is hurting the people I love the most.

And God will forgive you that. - I don't want God's forgiveness.

If there really is a God,

what I want is for him to protect my family

from what I've done.

Can he do that?

Will he do that?

Be yourself, you know? You're enough as you are.

But hey, it's okay also to be guarded. You don't have to make friends on your first day.

I already know Caitlin and Todd.

Still, it's a-- It's a big school.

- You got your phone? And it's charged? - Yeah.

Okay, well, don't forget to text me the moment you get home.

Are you gonna be okay, Dad?

Absolutely.

- Yeah? - Dad, maybe this was a mistake.

- What? - Changing schools.

- You said it's not too late to return to Willmont. - Forget what I said.

You've been lobbying me and your mom to go to public school for two years, right?

I knew you didn't want me to,

that it would make you uncomfortable and a little...

- Crazier than usual. - No.

You know what I mean.

Look, you wanna be here and I want what you want, okay?

I'm fine. I'm fine, sweetheart.

Okay, I'll be fine. How about that? All right.

- You be safe. Okay. - Okay.

Whoa.

Bye, Dad.

First day.

- Where are you going? - I'm parking the car.

No, you have to drop me off. I'm not coming in there with you.

No, no, you're gonna do great, Pax.

You know, if you need me, I'm right there.

Look, you gotta look at this as a new adventure.

You're gonna make friends in no time, I promise.

Do most...? Do most kids like you or...? I mean, do they think you're pretty cool?

Yeah, most. I hope.

- Okay, so when they find out I'm your son? - Just don't worry so much, okay?

Just be yourself.

Hey, it's better than being Brian Shaffer.

You see that big lug of a guy? He's been held back twice.

Not the brightest bulb.

Is everybody gonna know what I did at my old school?

No, of course not.

That's our secret, all right?

Okay.

Oh, she's back. Jackie!

How many weeks you get?

- Sir, it's ridiculous. - What's up?

Nice board, Andy. I like it.

Excuse me.

Good morning, Canaan High School faculty and students.

Welcome back, Coyotes.

At this time, we want to urge any students with information

regarding the whereabouts of senior Gretchen McGrath

to please report to Principal Taft's office.

Also, anyone wishing to try out for this year's fall play can sign up at the front desk.

- Morning, Marcy. - Morning, Mike.

Catch your breath. Chief wants to see you when you have a sec.

- What about? - Too official for me. Heh.

What sort of mother doesn't call the police for four days to report her daughter missing, hm?

My partner in already?

Oh, I think I saw her heading down to archives.

What are you doing, Ramos?

New kid on the block. Just doing a little homework.

Yeah, don't go making a mess, all right?

Stop, please. I-- I got a system.

Frankly, you're wasting your time. These are cold.

Quiet too. Five years now.

Still, it's your baby, right?

And what you said yesterday about our missing girl?

Gretchen's missing, all right? Not a body.

I got a call this morning from Iris Swan's mother.

Linda called you? Why?

Says she has some information on her daughter's murder.

Let me handle that, okay?

What's the latest on Gretchen McGrath?

Heard she had an itch to run away.

Well, just because she's a troubled kid doesn't mean there isn't foul play.

Not a kid. Turned 18 three weeks ago.

But the point is she's a local high school student.

You know, best for everyone if we can locate her.

Of course. But I'm worried about you, Mike.

Just being honest.

Promise me you're not starting to make leaps of logic here.

She's a missing girl, not a body. Tattoo or no tattoo.

Relax. I just told Ramos the same thing.

Maybe you should check in with Dr. Geller.

There's no shame in asking for help.

- What, so he can show me his creepy inkblots? - If it helps.

Department can't afford to lose you again.

What's on your mind, Ramos?

Linda mentioned she hadn't seen you in a while.

She used to you coming around?

Is that your question?

Just wondering...

is there anything to these rumors about your closeness

to the RRK victims' mothers?

Oh, yeah, yeah, that's all true.

I'm planning on fucking Linda Swan right now, so it's probably best you stay in the car, huh?

- Hey. - Hey.

- You okay? - Oh, you know.

You going to your meetings?

My sponsor dragged me to one this morning at the crack of dawn.

- Where's Tuck? - He's next door with Cora.

He likes her better than me.

- I doubt that's true. - Oh, it is at the moment, I'm afraid.

Because I won't give him a clown for his birthday party.

He's turning 7 next week, huh?

His new thing is to remind me that I'm his grandma, not his mother.

Oh, he loves you. And you love him. He's a lucky little man.

He's a pain in my ass, is what he is.

He's just like his mother was.

My partner tells me that you have some new information on Iris's case.

Did she?

Look, I'm sorry I haven't had the chance to return your calls.

- That's okay. - Or stop by lately.

I just saw the news about that missing girl.

Most likely a runaway.

You don't believe that.

I don't believe that.

What say I come by on the weekend and I'll bring some groceries...

I don't want your groceries.

I want you to promise me

that what happened to my Iris doesn't happen to anyone else.

And now it could be happening again.

What do you want from me, Linda?

I want you to give me my daughter back.

I can't.

Let's move. Get back. You go, Ned! Yeah, Mikey.

You don't think I could get into Occidental?

- Early decision? - No.

I actually think you have an excellent chance,

but I tell everyone it's a good idea to have a few backup schools just to be safe.

Mmm. Safe is boring. Maybe I like a little risk.

What about USF and LMU?

You expressed interest in both schools last time we met.

Do it for me?

- Fine. I'll do it for you. - Mm.

LMU, USF, Seattle U.

But you gotta promise to help me with the applications.

Lacey, that's what I'm here for.

So, um, how are things with your wife?

I don't think that's an appropriate question, Lacey. Do you?

I'm gonna get into Occidental. Early decision. Just watch me.

I'd bet money on it.

Answer the question. Have you seen Gretchen McGrath or not?

This is harassment. Not the first time either.

A girl goes missing, we check all registered sex offenders on that list.

That's why we have a list.

Like I said, never seen her before.

Did you use the ATM at QuickPump on Highway 12 last Friday, around 1 a.m.?

- Might have. - You did.

Then why are you asking?

Gretchen used the same ATM 40 minutes later. Happens to be her last known whereabouts.

And how many other people used that ATM between me and her?

Three.

But you come to my house.

Like I said, we found it interesting that you're on our list.

And since I'm on your list, you know my story.

Got a devotion to little boys, not teenage girls.

So go bother someone else who gives a shit.

Serrato.

Detective, we found Gretchen McGrath's cell phone down by the river.

Who found the phone?

Edgar Harris. He said he found it early this morning.

And he found it somewhere in this area?

He's not being specific.

Hey! Over here!

We're gonna need shovels.

- Here, here. - What?

- I got her. She's here. - Oh.

What the hell? Mike, she's not here.

That's it, guys! Keep it up! Two more minutes.

Nice, Dino. Nice!

Dino, clean reversal. Toby! Toby, Toby.

You gotta clear your hips. Watch out, Jackson. Get up, Toby. Watch out, watch out.

Look. Hand through, butt down.

Clear the hips with your shoulder.

You all right, Carter?

Go, buddy.

- I just got a cramp. I got a cramp. - I got you. Okay, relax, relax. Breathe.

- Breathe. Breathe. - Leo?

Relax.

Okay, guys, buddy up. Ten minutes of stretching.

Good first day.

Smile, Natalie. It can't be that bad.

- There's a call for you in the office. - Okay.

About your father.

- Is he dead? - No.

Well, you see? It's not that bad.

- Sorry, Steve. - Don't worry about it.

My grandfather had similar issues.

- Hey, Dad. - What are you doing here?

Well, uh, Steve gave me a call.

Said you were having, um, a little bit of trouble.

This is your fault.

I have a practice to maintain, patients to attend to.

I can't be dealing with your stupid tears all the time.

- Let me take you home. - I'm in the middle of my swim.

- Isn't that obvious? - You're not wearing a suit.

Enough!

You need to stop crying right now.

You're embarrassing me.

I'm, uh-- I'm really sorry about that, Dad.

Is it okay if I get Raul to take me back to my car?

That's not his job, is it?

Candace invited you for dinner.

I'm gonna write it down for you.

- I'll give you a call Saturday to remind you. - I'll remember just fine.

- Praise the Lord. - It's important to Candace.

She's not as docile as she seems, is she?

Best keep an eye on that one.

- She's my wife, Dad. - Even more reason.

We both want you there

and it'll give you a chance to spend a little time with your grandson.

I know Pax is looking forward to seeing you.

Are you checking the water?

I don't want it too hot.

Your mother's always making it too hot.

- She's been gone almost 30 years, Dad. - Who?

Hello!

Hello?

Hello!

Somebody better get a move on if we're gonna make our 6:00 reservation.

I don't think you should be going out tonight, Dad.

But your father promised to take me to LaSalette. Didn't you, doc?

- Yeah. He isn't feeling very well. - I feel great.

- You forgot where you were this afternoon. - Where were you this afternoon?

- Swimming at Hudson Pool. - See?

- He remembers just fine. - Yeah, he should rest.

He's tired.

Late nights, deep affections. That's the price of love.

What's the matter with you?

Stop it, doc. Your son is thinking.

About nonsense, I'm sure.

I should get going.

If you ever need to talk, BRAD: Yeah.

- I'm here. Right next door. - Yeah. Yeah.

Okay.

- Hey, Mike. - Bye.

Brad.

Did I scare him off?

I don't know why you do that.

Charmers like him are always hiding something.

- He's really not that charming. - Oh?

It's hard for him since Eileen went back to work. It's just he's home alone with the baby.

He's just looking for a sympathetic ear, is all.

Tell him to call the office, make an appointment, pay your hourly rate

like any other needy person.

What? Am I being an ass?

No more than usual.

Although, maybe I should feel flattered.

How's that?

Well, this passive-aggressive behavior, it could be seen as jealousy.

Don't you do that. Don't you play your shrink games with me.

- Hmm. Jealousy. - That is not jealousy.

I'm not jealous.

Of him?

You...

Yo, yo, Mr. D!

- Tight. - Hey, hey, hey!

- Yo, Mr. D! What's up? - Let me see that. Thanks.

- This the same stuff you sold me last week? - Yeah, Dr. Kush. Primo, huh?

My mom bought some legit shit at this fancy dispensary.

Totally tepid. It's like smoking ash.

Oh, whoa.

Check it out.

Yo, this guy I sell to, he's been fucking around with this "good girl till she knew me" Willmont bitch.

- Totally hot piece. - Gotta tap that ass!

Oh, you'd be lucky to wipe that ass.

Leo?

Leo?

What's in there?

Oh, hey. How was your first day?

Uh, it was fine.

Why do you keep that locked?

Neighbors had a bunch of break-ins.

Tell me about school. Did you make any friends?

- Uh, no. - No?

What about that, uh, that girl you were talking to?

- When? - Before homeroom bell.

- Thought she was kind of cute. - Were you spying on me?

No, I just-- I just saw you.

Okay, well, she wasn't very nice, so...

Well, she seemed nice.

- You guys were laughing. - We were.

Until I told her that I got kicked out of my old school

for bringing a loaded gun to class. Oh, and that I hated most people.

Especially stupid high school girls like her.

You didn't tell her that, did you?

Hi. How was school?

Where have you been?

I thought you were coming home after wrestling practice.

I am sorry, baby. First-day paperwork.

Come on. Here.

- Hi, Mom. Hi. - That there, all right?

Yeah, we're just sitting down to dinner.

I'll call you back, all right? Hold on. Hold on.

Hey, Sam, Sam. Enough, honey.

We lied. Practice doesn't always make perfect.

Stop it!

Forks on the left, knives on the right.

It's Jake's turn to set the table.

I'm trying to teach you the proper way.

Does Jake wanna learn how to do it the proper way

or does Jake wanna do it his way?

His way.

You asked.

Fair enough. Jake's table.

- You expect me to eat that? - Yes, I expect you to eat it.

And I expect you to like it or at least pretend to.

Hey, what's the rule?

Nobody eats until Mom lifts her fork.

Come on.

All right.

What did I do now?

Can't a father look at his daughter?

- I'd prefer if you didn't. - Then stop being so beautiful.

- Oh, my God, what a complete asshat. - Ha-ha-ha.

Fine, then I'll look at your sister, who is equally beautiful.

Somebody's had too many beers.

Why don't you tell your dad and me what you're looking forward to at school.

I'm looking forward to getting it over with and torching this uniform.

What she's looking forward to is showing off her new bra size.

- Shut up. - Yeah, and her new tattoo.

Tell me you don't have a tattoo.

Big deal. So do you.

Where?

Show me.

Look, it's my body.

Yeah, and right now, I own it.

I-- I clothe it, I feed it, I house it.

So that thing comes off first appointment we can get.

- No. - Yes!

Jeez, chill out, will you? It's fake.

Duh.

Ow.

Mike, ju--

- Dad, it hurts. - Stop it.

- Ow, Dad. - Stop it.

Mike, stop it!

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

What's going on, Mike?

Look, it's, um... It's under control.

It's that missing girl, isn't it?

You think it might be him again.

Who?

Mike.

I can't stand that Paxton hates me.

No, he doesn't hate you.

It doesn't help that his mother thinks I'm a whore.

Why do you always do that?

It's not my fault he came to live with us. She sent him.

Nicole misses him. It's hard for her.

You're a beautiful younger woman taking her place, raising her kid.

- I'm not taking her place. - I know.

I mean, it just feels that way to her.

It's still not fair that she puts him in the middle.

You're right.

That is why I love you.

You're a very caring person.

Well, I know what it's like to have a fucked-up childhood.

Sometimes that is the only way to describe it.

- I'll go to confession. - Ow.

By the way, I talked to your dad this morning.

Reminded him about dinner.

Told him Dotty was welcome.

I also invited him to join us for church.

Baby-- Baby, I wish you'd stop doing that.

- It's not gonna happen. - You might be surprised.

People are more open to God's grace in times of crisis.

His memory issue isn't a crisis. He forgets sometimes.

Trust me, he'll never forget he doesn't believe in God.

He forgot all about dinner.

And I don't think he even knew who I was at first.

He called me Beth.

- Wasn't Beth your mother's name? - Jesus Christ, Candace! Just--

Just leave the old man alone, okay?

Oh, my God. I'm totally drenched.

Look, I got the munchies. You want anything?

Okay, I'll be right back.

No!

No!

That's great.

Well, thanks. We appreciate you calling. Bye.

Gretchen turned up.

What? Where?

That was the high school. She showed up this morning.

- When did you get home? - Last night.

Your mother couldn't call to let us know?

She was sleeping.

- And where have you been? - That's my business, isn't it?

I met this guy at a bonfire up at Spring Lake,

this shaman.

You spent a week up at the lake

with somebody who called themselves a shaman.

You didn't think to contact anybody?

What's the big deal? I'm 18. I can take care of myself.

Yeah, but if you couldn't and you needed help,

how would you have called?

- We have your phone. - Yeah, somebody stole it.

Can I get it back?

Come by the station.

So can I go now?

Look, you might be 18, but you're still a kid.

Somebody ought to tell you the truth.

There's plenty of bad guys out there just looking for stupid girls like you.

Fuck you, Dad.

Cute, but if you were my daughter,

I'd shake some sense into you.

Lucky for me, I'm not.

Now, can I go?

Don't wanna miss any more school. So much to learn.

Whoa, Gretchen!

Hey, Mr. D.

Did you miss me?

As a matter of fact, it's no fun seeing a student of mine

on a missing persons billboard, especially someone like you.

You all right, Mr. D?

No offense, but you look like your aura's whacked or something.

- My "aura," huh? - Shut up.

Have you given any thought to what we talked about in terms of art school?

Yeah, I worked on my portfolio over the summer.

Oh, God.

Oh, boy. Now I'm in trouble.

I can't seem to get that woman to like me no matter how hard I try.

Why would you want to?

If you ask me, Principal Taft is a royal bitch.

Guess I'd better get to class.

One more year, you're free.

There's a whole big world out there, Gretchen.

Hmm.

Thank you so much. That means the world.

Oh, no, it just takes me back home.

I'm sure you cook some good food yourself.

I just love it. I just have it for breakfast, for lunch.

I need to stop.

Would you like some more salad?

- Been a while. - Not long enough.

Ain't that life?

The darkness creeps back in when you ain't looking.

Same as before?

Careful, five or six drops will do the trick.

You wanna kill the beast, not the rest.

You all right?

No. Can I get a ride?

Yeah.

- Yeah. Come on in. - Yeah? Thank you.

Thanks.

Would you believe it's the second time I've run out of gas this month?

- So stupid. - Yeah.

Then my phone died.

Well, happens to the best of us.

So where do you work?

- Diamond Joe's, over on Bodega Avenue. - Mm.

Kind of a dump, but the tips are pretty decent.

Yeah, don't they...? Don't they close at 2?

Ah, inventory. At least that's what the boss calls it.

Touched a girl's ass once, so she said.

But I just think he brushed up against her behind the bar.

He's kind of fat, so he's always squeezing by us, you know?

Mm.

Like I said, the tips are good.

And I've got a baby girl at home, so...

Spent last summer in Las Vegas.

Thought I wanted to be a dealer.

Work the roulette table. Something.

Pay can be pretty good.

But Vegas wasn't for me.

Is something wrong?

I can probably just walk the rest--

Is this some kind of joke? Because it's not funny, mister.

- You're kind of scaring-- - Get out!

Creep!

Leave all the fears, the anger and the past behind.

Begin to live again.

May Almighty God have mercy on us,

forgive us our sins,

and bring us to everlasting life.

- Amen. - Amen.

I want to take a moment now to thank all of you who prayed

for the safe return of local high school student Gretchen McGrath.

Our prayers were mercifully answered.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Oh, this is my truck, sorry. - Oh!

Heh. Sorry.