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1
00:00:02,326 --> 00:00:04,024
-♪
-[owl hooting]
2
00:00:05,764 --> 00:00:06,896
Yeah.
3
00:00:06,939 --> 00:00:08,071
Get it, son.
4
00:00:08,115 --> 00:00:09,899
Aah!
5
00:00:09,942 --> 00:00:12,075
-[growling]
-[gasping, grunting]
6
00:00:12,119 --> 00:00:14,295
[spits]
7
00:00:14,338 --> 00:00:16,471
["Come On Eileen" byDexys Midnight Runners playing]
8
00:00:16,514 --> 00:00:19,648
-What the blazes?
You've got to be kidding.
-I didn't say anything.
9
00:00:19,691 --> 00:00:22,085
-Please, just...
-Shut up. I'm not talking
to you, jogger man.
10
00:00:22,129 --> 00:00:23,913
What was the name of that song?
11
00:00:23,956 --> 00:00:25,654
-[mumbles]: "Come On Eileen."
-Speak up.
12
00:00:25,697 --> 00:00:27,003
"Come On Eileen."
13
00:00:27,047 --> 00:00:29,484
-From when?
-1982, maybe?
14
00:00:29,527 --> 00:00:31,268
Like hell it was.
15
00:00:31,312 --> 00:00:34,358
-♪ Come on Eileen...♪-I've been robbed. I say robbed!
16
00:00:34,402 --> 00:00:35,881
-NANDOR:
What is the great emergency?
-Shush.
17
00:00:35,925 --> 00:00:38,667
Someone has stolen oneof Laszlo's songs that he wrote.
18
00:00:38,710 --> 00:00:41,235
-Did you really write
"Come On Eileen"?
-Yes, I did.
19
00:00:41,278 --> 00:00:43,454
I wrote this melody in 1852.
20
00:00:43,498 --> 00:00:45,500
It was called "Chum on Irene."
21
00:00:45,543 --> 00:00:48,372
An ode to the local
fishmonger's missus, Irene.
22
00:00:48,416 --> 00:00:51,245
Charming lady. My darling, willyou tell him to turn that off?
23
00:00:51,288 --> 00:00:52,985
-Silence this machine.
-[music stops]
24
00:00:53,029 --> 00:00:55,162
I've been shit on
from a great height.
25
00:00:55,205 --> 00:00:57,164
-[doorbell rings]
-And it's not the first time.
-Tell them about
26
00:00:57,207 --> 00:00:58,904
-"For He's a Jolly Good Fellow."-I wrote that song.
27
00:00:58,948 --> 00:01:00,254
"For IAm a Jolly Good Fellow."
28
00:01:00,297 --> 00:01:01,603
That's what it was
originally called.
29
00:01:01,646 --> 00:01:04,040
I'm. Not he or she. I'm.
30
00:01:04,084 --> 00:01:05,041
[Laszlo speaking in distance]
31
00:01:05,085 --> 00:01:07,043
-Hello.
-Greetings.
32
00:01:07,087 --> 00:01:08,523
Is Nandor at home?
33
00:01:08,566 --> 00:01:09,915
Maybe.
Who are you?
34
00:01:09,959 --> 00:01:11,917
I'm his familiar, Benjy Everett.
35
00:01:11,961 --> 00:01:14,355
Nandor's gonna make me
a vampire.
36
00:01:16,444 --> 00:01:18,315
["You're Dead"
by Norma Tanega playing]
37
00:01:18,359 --> 00:01:21,013
♪ Don't sing if you want
to live long♪
38
00:01:21,057 --> 00:01:23,320
♪ They have no use
for your song♪
39
00:01:23,364 --> 00:01:26,193
♪ You're dead, you're dead,
you're dead♪
40
00:01:26,236 --> 00:01:29,065
♪ You're dead
and out of this world♪
41
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:33,548
♪ Now your hope and compassion
is gone♪
42
00:01:33,591 --> 00:01:36,203
♪ You sold out your dream
to the world♪
43
00:01:36,246 --> 00:01:38,640
♪ Stay dead, stay dead,
stay dead♪
44
00:01:38,683 --> 00:01:41,208
♪ You're dead
and out of this world.♪
45
00:01:41,251 --> 00:01:43,210
♪
46
00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,655
Such a wonderful surprise.
47
00:01:53,698 --> 00:01:55,439
-It's...
-[whispers]: Benjy.
48
00:01:55,483 --> 00:01:56,875
...Benjy.
49
00:01:56,919 --> 00:01:59,051
-How long has it been?
-40 years, Master.
50
00:01:59,095 --> 00:02:02,185
40 years.
Wow,
51
00:02:02,229 --> 00:02:04,013
you haven't aged a bit.
52
00:02:04,056 --> 00:02:05,623
Benjy was my familiar
53
00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:08,887
for a time during the 1970s.
54
00:02:08,931 --> 00:02:11,673
He was fine,
but he was quite vocal
55
00:02:11,716 --> 00:02:15,024
about his desire
to become a vampire.
56
00:02:15,067 --> 00:02:16,852
So irritating.
57
00:02:16,895 --> 00:02:18,462
I couldn't take it anymore,
58
00:02:18,506 --> 00:02:22,074
so I hypnotized him
to forget about us here.
59
00:02:22,118 --> 00:02:23,337
Then I left him
60
00:02:23,380 --> 00:02:24,773
in a rest stop.
61
00:02:24,816 --> 00:02:26,470
In Delaware.
62
00:02:26,514 --> 00:02:27,558
Don't feel bad for me.
63
00:02:27,602 --> 00:02:29,995
-I don't.
-I've had an outstanding life.
64
00:02:30,039 --> 00:02:31,345
Got to thank my missus for that.
65
00:02:31,388 --> 00:02:33,434
-Paula saved me.
She found me wandering around
-Aw.
66
00:02:33,477 --> 00:02:36,001
at a rest stop in Delaware,
67
00:02:36,045 --> 00:02:38,830
high on drugs, talking ragtime.
68
00:02:38,874 --> 00:02:40,223
She got me cleaned up.
69
00:02:40,267 --> 00:02:42,225
Helped me land a job
in the insurance game.
70
00:02:42,269 --> 00:02:44,401
That's a fantastic industry.
71
00:02:44,445 --> 00:02:47,491
But how did you find your way
back here?
72
00:02:47,535 --> 00:02:48,884
Paula got me to try Lumosity.
73
00:02:48,927 --> 00:02:50,451
Keep the brain sharp.
74
00:02:50,494 --> 00:02:52,017
This is a herb or elixir?
75
00:02:52,061 --> 00:02:55,064
-It's an app on the phone, Ma...-Shh. Let him talk.
76
00:02:55,107 --> 00:02:56,370
It's an app on the phone.
77
00:02:56,413 --> 00:02:58,328
After about a week on it,
all these
78
00:02:58,372 --> 00:03:00,025
memories came flooding back,
79
00:03:00,069 --> 00:03:01,853
-Aw, shit. Mm.
-Staten Island,
80
00:03:01,897 --> 00:03:03,855
Nandor, Laszlo...
81
00:03:03,899 --> 00:03:05,466
-Memories.
-Nadja,
82
00:03:05,509 --> 00:03:07,250
that Dilbert-looking guy?
83
00:03:07,294 --> 00:03:08,382
BOTH [quietly]:
Colin Robinson.
84
00:03:08,425 --> 00:03:10,035
That's when I realized--
Nandor,
85
00:03:10,079 --> 00:03:12,386
you son of a bitch.
86
00:03:12,429 --> 00:03:13,300
You were testing me.
87
00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:15,737
Yes.
88
00:03:15,780 --> 00:03:17,521
I'm ready to be a vampire.
89
00:03:17,565 --> 00:03:19,131
NANDOR:
Congratulations.
90
00:03:19,175 --> 00:03:21,351
But first, Benjy, you must rest.
91
00:03:21,395 --> 00:03:22,874
Guillermo,
show Benjy to the, uh,
92
00:03:22,918 --> 00:03:24,702
-bigroom.
-Oh, I know the way.
93
00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:27,270
This place
hasn't changed at all.
94
00:03:27,314 --> 00:03:30,969
Ah! Here's another onethat was cruelly stolen from me.
95
00:03:31,013 --> 00:03:33,624
Now sung in every schoolyard
across the land.
96
00:03:33,668 --> 00:03:35,409
But this is the original.
97
00:03:35,452 --> 00:03:38,325
♪ Stroke, stroke,
stroke your cock♪
98
00:03:38,368 --> 00:03:40,327
-[humming along]
-♪ Hurry, make it cream♪
99
00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:42,546
♪ Merrily, merrily,
merrily, merrily♪
100
00:03:42,590 --> 00:03:45,462
-♪ Ah, ha, ha, hee, hee.♪-♪
Life could use more cream.♪
101
00:03:45,506 --> 00:03:47,986
What I love about it is
you wouldn't expect it
102
00:03:48,030 --> 00:03:49,423
to rhyme "cream" with "cream."
103
00:03:49,466 --> 00:03:50,511
NADJA:
My Laszlo has always
104
00:03:50,554 --> 00:03:51,468
been quite musical.
105
00:03:51,512 --> 00:03:52,904
It's true,
I can play anything,
106
00:03:52,948 --> 00:03:54,297
I don't give a monkey's.
107
00:03:54,341 --> 00:03:56,386
Whether it's
a three-way plunk box,
108
00:03:56,430 --> 00:03:58,345
-Antoine Sax's
metallic clarinet,
-NADJA: Oh, yes.
109
00:03:58,388 --> 00:04:00,564
-or the chimp grinder's
wind piano.
-NADJA: Mm.
110
00:04:00,608 --> 00:04:02,305
But I'll tell you this,
my luck changed
111
00:04:02,349 --> 00:04:03,872
the night I met Nadja,
112
00:04:03,915 --> 00:04:07,136
for she is
an exquisite lyricist.
113
00:04:07,179 --> 00:04:08,355
Guilty, Your Honor.
114
00:04:08,398 --> 00:04:09,704
Send me down.
115
00:04:09,747 --> 00:04:11,140
See?
116
00:04:11,183 --> 00:04:13,447
Laszlo, I love this one.
Shall we do it?
117
00:04:13,490 --> 00:04:15,100
♪ Whatever happened♪
118
00:04:15,144 --> 00:04:17,102
♪ To sweet Daisy Lou?♪
119
00:04:17,146 --> 00:04:19,104
♪ Her hoop skirt
was a poop skirt♪
120
00:04:19,148 --> 00:04:20,889
♪ When she couldn't find the♪
121
00:04:20,932 --> 00:04:22,369
-COLIN: Hello!
-♪ Loo.♪
122
00:04:22,412 --> 00:04:23,892
Hi.
123
00:04:23,935 --> 00:04:25,328
-LASZLO: What do you want?
-That sounded great.
124
00:04:25,372 --> 00:04:27,896
Have you ever thought
of maybe performing live?
125
00:04:27,939 --> 00:04:31,378
Kind of a "300 Years
of Great Music"?
126
00:04:31,421 --> 00:04:33,510
But no one has even heard
most of these songs.
127
00:04:33,554 --> 00:04:35,120
"Witches Are Snitches."
128
00:04:35,164 --> 00:04:36,557
"Horse-Drawn Carriage
Full of Ass."
129
00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:38,210
"Wannabe."
130
00:04:38,254 --> 00:04:40,256
If you want, I can
put out some feelers.
131
00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:43,128
Well, if you can sort out
a concert, we might turn up.
132
00:04:43,172 --> 00:04:44,478
I'll see what I can do, daddy-o.
133
00:04:44,521 --> 00:04:45,740
-Rock on.
-Yeah.
-Okay.
134
00:04:45,783 --> 00:04:48,220
Nothing unlocks
anger and boredom
135
00:04:48,264 --> 00:04:50,484
-[Nadja singing in distance]
-quite like old-timey music.
136
00:04:50,527 --> 00:04:52,921
[giggles]:
I'm excited.
137
00:04:52,964 --> 00:04:54,705
Wow.
138
00:04:54,749 --> 00:04:57,012
Can you believe
I slept in this closet
139
00:04:57,055 --> 00:04:58,492
ten years?
140
00:04:58,535 --> 00:05:00,058
That's my old pillow.
141
00:05:00,102 --> 00:05:03,018
God, I used to beat off
into that thing every night.
142
00:05:03,061 --> 00:05:05,020
-Oh, not that pillow.
-Definitely that one.
143
00:05:05,063 --> 00:05:06,500
Same sheets, too.
144
00:05:06,543 --> 00:05:09,546
Hey, can I come to the familiarmixer with you tonight?
145
00:05:09,590 --> 00:05:12,810
-Yeah, sure.
-My last chance to kick up
my heels as a familiar
146
00:05:12,854 --> 00:05:15,422
before they make me a vampire.
147
00:05:20,905 --> 00:05:22,080
Thank you, Guillermo.
148
00:05:22,124 --> 00:05:24,300
It's a lot livelier
than I remember.
149
00:05:24,344 --> 00:05:25,519
What?
150
00:05:25,562 --> 00:05:27,564
-Freddy? Benjy Everett.
-Benjy. Ah.
151
00:05:27,608 --> 00:05:30,393
GUILLERMO:
I guess these mixers started as a way for familiars
152
00:05:30,437 --> 00:05:33,222
to network
and exchange work techniques,
153
00:05:33,265 --> 00:05:34,615
but it's mostly bitching.
154
00:05:34,658 --> 00:05:36,530
And sad hookups.
155
00:05:36,573 --> 00:05:38,619
My vampire let me drive here,
156
00:05:38,662 --> 00:05:41,317
so if you
need a ride anywhere,
157
00:05:41,361 --> 00:05:44,799
-or if you just want to,
like, sit and chat or...
-Aw...
158
00:05:44,842 --> 00:05:47,454
-whatever...
-Is that Celeste?
159
00:05:47,497 --> 00:05:50,544
-I'm gonna go say hi.
-You know, you don't even
have to do anything, you know.
160
00:05:50,587 --> 00:05:52,328
So she was like, "Screw it,
161
00:05:52,372 --> 00:05:54,330
I'm just gonna
make you a vampire." [laughs]
162
00:05:54,374 --> 00:05:57,246
-BRAD: Did it hurt?
-Yes. It did.
163
00:05:57,289 --> 00:05:58,247
-Hey, Celeste.
-CELESTE: It did.
164
00:05:58,290 --> 00:06:00,423
[gasps]
Hi!
165
00:06:00,467 --> 00:06:02,817
-Elmo!
-Guillermo.
166
00:06:02,860 --> 00:06:05,210
-Hello.
-[chuckles]
167
00:06:05,254 --> 00:06:07,430
Celeste was a familiar
that I used to help out
168
00:06:07,474 --> 00:06:10,302
when she had too many bodies
that she couldn't get rid of.
169
00:06:10,346 --> 00:06:11,652
Her master was
a 12-year-old girl.
170
00:06:11,695 --> 00:06:14,132
She's been 12 for 150 years.
171
00:06:14,176 --> 00:06:15,482
I'd say her job
hasn't been easy.
172
00:06:15,525 --> 00:06:17,005
She's paid her dues, and...
173
00:06:17,048 --> 00:06:18,267
she's a vampire now.
174
00:06:18,310 --> 00:06:19,442
I am so...
175
00:06:19,486 --> 00:06:21,488
happy for her.
176
00:06:23,533 --> 00:06:25,579
That's so cool
that you are now a...
177
00:06:25,622 --> 00:06:27,624
Are... Is that real...
178
00:06:27,668 --> 00:06:28,625
blood?
179
00:06:28,669 --> 00:06:30,148
I vape it.
Delicious.
180
00:06:30,192 --> 00:06:32,324
I mean, it's delicious to me,
now that I'm a vampire,
181
00:06:32,368 --> 00:06:34,283
-but you'd probably hate it.
-Probably like it if I was.
182
00:06:34,326 --> 00:06:35,893
No.
It's not for you.
183
00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:37,242
You'd be like...
[coughing]
184
00:06:37,286 --> 00:06:40,071
Hey, you're still working
for Nandor, right?
185
00:06:40,115 --> 00:06:41,943
Uh, I've been there
11 years, so...
186
00:06:41,986 --> 00:06:44,380
11 years?
[hisses]
187
00:06:44,424 --> 00:06:46,643
Wow. Well, I'm not
doing it like that.
188
00:06:46,687 --> 00:06:48,689
I've promised all of my
familiars that they'll be
189
00:06:48,732 --> 00:06:51,126
vampires within eight months,
maximum.
190
00:06:51,169 --> 00:06:52,519
-Eight months?
-I'm building
191
00:06:52,562 --> 00:06:54,825
a vampire community.
192
00:06:54,869 --> 00:06:57,698
We will have vampire music,
vampire dance,
193
00:06:57,741 --> 00:06:59,134
vampire origami,
194
00:06:59,177 --> 00:07:00,875
-vampire maths.
-Wow.
195
00:07:00,918 --> 00:07:02,877
Are you fully staffed, or do...
196
00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,053
Oh, I don't poach.
Vampire code.
197
00:07:05,096 --> 00:07:06,750
I mean, my door's always open.
198
00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:09,579
But you have to be free and
clear of your current master.
199
00:07:09,623 --> 00:07:10,754
-So it's really up to you.
-Celeste.
200
00:07:10,798 --> 00:07:12,408
Sorry.
This-this is Karen.
201
00:07:12,452 --> 00:07:14,192
-Karen is, like,
dying to meet you.
-Hi, I'm Karen.
202
00:07:14,236 --> 00:07:16,368
-She's, like, a big fan.-I'm so interested in your work.-Dying to meet me.
203
00:07:16,412 --> 00:07:18,153
-Dying to meet you.
-Sorry.
-BENJY: I know it's gonna
204
00:07:18,196 --> 00:07:20,503
happen to me.
I know I'm gonna be a vampire.
205
00:07:20,547 --> 00:07:22,287
-I can feel it.
It's gonna happen.
-Wait, wait. Benjy. Benjy.
206
00:07:22,331 --> 00:07:25,595
Benjy. Benjy.
I think I'm up first,
207
00:07:25,639 --> 00:07:27,205
'cause I've been around
a lot longer than you.
208
00:07:27,249 --> 00:07:28,555
-Okay.
-You know.
209
00:07:28,598 --> 00:07:32,123
♪ Documentary crew♪
210
00:07:32,167 --> 00:07:33,777
♪ I want to eat you♪
211
00:07:33,821 --> 00:07:36,345
♪ So, so bad...♪
212
00:07:36,388 --> 00:07:37,520
-What? What's wrong?
-Nothing.
213
00:07:37,564 --> 00:07:39,348
I like the end of that one,
214
00:07:39,391 --> 00:07:42,177
I just feel like we're trying
to be too contemporary.
215
00:07:42,220 --> 00:07:44,179
Oh, my darling, all of our
greatest hits have been songs
216
00:07:44,222 --> 00:07:47,008
that really captured the spiritof the time, like, um,
217
00:07:47,051 --> 00:07:49,445
-the one about the Olympics.
-Oh, yes.
218
00:07:49,489 --> 00:07:53,144
♪ Pole vaulting, long jumping,
we're all quite impressed♪
219
00:07:53,188 --> 00:07:55,146
♪ Tell us, Mr. Hitler♪
220
00:07:55,190 --> 00:07:57,714
♪ What do you
have planned next?♪
221
00:07:57,758 --> 00:08:00,456
I'm not sure that's aged well.
222
00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:01,979
You know what?
223
00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:04,242
If we slide your coffin
over a little,
224
00:08:04,286 --> 00:08:05,896
we could put my coffin
right next to it.
225
00:08:05,940 --> 00:08:07,550
Yes, I'll get
right on that, Benjy.
226
00:08:07,594 --> 00:08:08,943
-[sighs]
-[knocking]
227
00:08:08,986 --> 00:08:11,336
Excuse me, Master,may I speak with you in private?
228
00:08:11,380 --> 00:08:13,164
I would like that.
Uh, Benjy?
229
00:08:13,208 --> 00:08:15,210
Leave us.
This sounds important.
230
00:08:15,253 --> 00:08:17,691
-I got to take a leak, anyway.
-You do that.
231
00:08:17,734 --> 00:08:20,955
[sighs]
Thank you for that, Guillermo.
232
00:08:20,998 --> 00:08:22,478
Are there any places in America
233
00:08:22,522 --> 00:08:24,785
that are further away
than Delaware?
234
00:08:24,828 --> 00:08:26,917
Yes, of course, but I needto speak to you about something.
235
00:08:26,961 --> 00:08:29,964
-It's personal.
-Oh, no.
236
00:08:30,007 --> 00:08:31,574
No, it's okay, Guillermo.
You really don't have to.
237
00:08:31,618 --> 00:08:34,577
If it's difficult to say,
it's probably best...
238
00:08:34,621 --> 00:08:37,798
-Take a seat, Master.
-Oh... shit.
239
00:08:37,841 --> 00:08:40,017
[exhales sharply]
240
00:08:40,061 --> 00:08:42,846
[Nandor straining]
241
00:08:42,890 --> 00:08:46,241
Master, are you planning
on making me a vampire?
242
00:08:47,285 --> 00:08:49,461
Are you bullshitting me on this?
243
00:08:49,505 --> 00:08:51,246
How is it that now
244
00:08:51,289 --> 00:08:53,814
everyone thinks
they can be a vampire?
245
00:08:53,857 --> 00:08:56,599
I told you before,
we'll talk about it later.
246
00:08:56,643 --> 00:08:58,775
You always want to talk
about it later. Well, what if
247
00:08:58,819 --> 00:09:00,821
I have a better offer
right now? Hmm?
248
00:09:00,864 --> 00:09:02,083
-What, right now?
-Yes.
249
00:09:02,126 --> 00:09:03,824
[snorts]
Then you should take it.
250
00:09:03,867 --> 00:09:05,303
What?
251
00:09:06,653 --> 00:09:07,784
You should take it.
252
00:09:09,090 --> 00:09:10,395
Well, then, I will.
253
00:09:10,439 --> 00:09:11,701
-Okay, then do.
-Okay, then, I will.
254
00:09:11,745 --> 00:09:12,789
Okay, then, you should.
255
00:09:12,833 --> 00:09:14,835
-Then I'll take it. Okay.
-Okay, go.
256
00:09:14,878 --> 00:09:16,576
Great.
257
00:09:18,490 --> 00:09:20,841
Well... are you...
258
00:09:20,884 --> 00:09:22,843
are you gonna be
all right without me?
259
00:09:22,886 --> 00:09:24,714
Yes, I'll be fine.
260
00:09:24,758 --> 00:09:26,760
Thankfully, Benjy has returned,
261
00:09:26,803 --> 00:09:28,413
and Benjy
262
00:09:28,457 --> 00:09:30,677
is the best familiar
I've ever had.
263
00:09:30,720 --> 00:09:34,419
So everything will be okay-A.
264
00:09:34,463 --> 00:09:35,856
A-okay.
265
00:09:35,899 --> 00:09:36,639
O-A-kay.
266
00:09:36,683 --> 00:09:37,901
A-okay.
267
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:39,816
As I said.
268
00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:43,385
Well, thank you.
I learned a lot from you.
269
00:09:46,518 --> 00:09:48,477
[mutters]:
You're being stupid.
270
00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:49,696
What was that?
271
00:09:49,739 --> 00:09:51,523
Uh, nothing.
272
00:09:51,567 --> 00:09:53,569
I didn't say anything.
273
00:09:53,613 --> 00:09:55,832
Okay, then.
274
00:10:00,054 --> 00:10:01,446
NANDOR:
I treated
275
00:10:01,490 --> 00:10:03,318
Guillermo like a son,
276
00:10:03,361 --> 00:10:05,146
and this is how he repays me?
277
00:10:05,189 --> 00:10:07,452
I held that little guy
in my arms
278
00:10:07,496 --> 00:10:10,151
so he could pretend to fly.
279
00:10:10,194 --> 00:10:13,023
GUILLERMO:
Disrespected, unappreciated,
280
00:10:13,067 --> 00:10:14,372
overlooked.
281
00:10:14,416 --> 00:10:15,896
I made him some kind
282
00:10:15,939 --> 00:10:18,594
of glitter picture
on his birthday.
283
00:10:18,638 --> 00:10:20,074
I did all kinds of shit
284
00:10:20,117 --> 00:10:23,817
for him that I can't even
think of right now.
285
00:10:23,860 --> 00:10:25,819
So that's why
286
00:10:25,862 --> 00:10:28,517
I can't be here anymore.
287
00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,127
NANDOR:
Listen to me, little man.
288
00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:32,913
From Panera Bread you came,
289
00:10:32,956 --> 00:10:35,872
and to Panera Bread
you shall return.
290
00:10:43,227 --> 00:10:44,968
Hello?
291
00:10:45,012 --> 00:10:46,970
-[gasps]
-Hi.
292
00:10:47,014 --> 00:10:48,493
Guillermo!
293
00:10:48,537 --> 00:10:50,321
[hisses]
Come in.
294
00:10:50,365 --> 00:10:52,149
Mwah.
You brought friends.
295
00:10:52,193 --> 00:10:53,629
Ah. Hello.
[laughs]
296
00:10:53,673 --> 00:10:55,196
Wow.
297
00:10:55,239 --> 00:10:56,197
CELESTE:
Welcome. Come in.
298
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:57,807
GUILLERMO:
Does your master still
299
00:10:57,851 --> 00:10:59,722
-live here with you?
-Ugh, no.
300
00:10:59,766 --> 00:11:02,725
Houston and her clique are downin Florida hunting pervs.
301
00:11:02,769 --> 00:11:05,859
-Cool.
-Everyone,
let's welcome Guillermo.
302
00:11:05,902 --> 00:11:06,903
-Hi, Guillermo.
-Hi.
303
00:11:06,947 --> 00:11:09,514
-[cat meows]
-And you know Sam, of course?
304
00:11:09,558 --> 00:11:11,516
GUILLERMO:
Oh, yeah. Hey, what's up, Sam?
305
00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:13,997
CELESTE:
His familiar skills
are just unreal.
306
00:11:14,041 --> 00:11:15,651
He did all of this himself.
307
00:11:15,695 --> 00:11:17,522
The plating, the charcuterie.
Can you imagine?
308
00:11:17,566 --> 00:11:19,524
With those little paws.
He's a genius.
309
00:11:19,568 --> 00:11:20,874
-Oh.
-Sit.
310
00:11:20,917 --> 00:11:22,614
Welcome, everyone.
311
00:11:22,658 --> 00:11:25,574
Your presence is a blessing
and a privilege.
312
00:11:27,358 --> 00:11:29,317
So I just have a few rules.
313
00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:31,145
Number one, listen.
314
00:11:33,930 --> 00:11:36,150
Because we are here to grow.
315
00:11:36,193 --> 00:11:38,369
-Yes, Master.
-No "master." I don't believe
in that bullshit.
316
00:11:38,413 --> 00:11:39,806
We don't do that here.
317
00:11:39,849 --> 00:11:41,677
It's okay, you're new.
And one final thing.
318
00:11:41,721 --> 00:11:44,027
Since Guillermo was
the last one here,
319
00:11:44,071 --> 00:11:47,378
it's his turn
to go get the Shake Shack.
320
00:11:47,422 --> 00:11:48,902
-Really? Shake Shack?
-Yes.
321
00:11:48,945 --> 00:11:51,469
-What should I get?
-Get Shake Shack.
322
00:11:51,513 --> 00:11:52,775
-Shake Shack for everyone.
-Yeah.
323
00:11:52,819 --> 00:11:53,994
-[laughing]
-CELESTE: Hurry.
324
00:11:54,037 --> 00:11:55,256
Let's take this furniture
outside.
325
00:11:55,299 --> 00:11:57,171
-I don't like it anymore.
-Okay. Totally.
326
00:11:59,086 --> 00:12:00,348
[grunts]
327
00:12:00,391 --> 00:12:02,132
Anytime tomorrow, Benjy.
328
00:12:02,176 --> 00:12:04,656
I'm sorry. I tweaked
the old back last week
329
00:12:04,700 --> 00:12:07,181
-playing golf with the grandson.-I'm not interested.
330
00:12:07,224 --> 00:12:09,661
Might be easier if I just
go get you a new pair.
331
00:12:09,705 --> 00:12:12,012
-Do you have five bucks?
-That's not what
shoes cost anymore.
332
00:12:12,055 --> 00:12:14,057
What happened to those
white platform shoes?
333
00:12:14,101 --> 00:12:16,625
-I gave them away to a homeless.-You looked so tall in them.
334
00:12:16,668 --> 00:12:19,802
-Well, they were stupid.
-So, what do you boogie in?
335
00:12:19,846 --> 00:12:20,803
-I...
-You can't boogie in these.
336
00:12:20,847 --> 00:12:22,022
I don't boogie.
337
00:12:22,065 --> 00:12:23,284
-Nobody boogies anymore.
-Oh.
338
00:12:23,327 --> 00:12:24,589
-What are you doing?
-You got me thinking
339
00:12:24,633 --> 00:12:26,026
about playing golf
with my grandson.
340
00:12:26,069 --> 00:12:27,810
-[groans]
-You got to see this kid.
341
00:12:27,854 --> 00:12:29,812
He swings a club
like a young Tiger...
342
00:12:29,856 --> 00:12:31,248
-Tiger.
-Tiger Woods.
343
00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:32,684
Tiger Woods.
That's the fella.
344
00:12:32,728 --> 00:12:33,947
I don't even know
what "jolf" is,
345
00:12:33,990 --> 00:12:35,949
but I know his name
is Tiger Woods.
346
00:12:35,992 --> 00:12:37,298
Where the hell's his picture?
347
00:12:37,341 --> 00:12:39,866
That's my finger.
That's my finger.
348
00:12:39,909 --> 00:12:42,303
That's my finger.
349
00:12:42,346 --> 00:12:43,957
♪ My baby's gone,
got me feeling so low♪
350
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:45,436
♪ My Lindbergh baby,
where did he go?♪
351
00:12:45,480 --> 00:12:47,874
No.
Laszlo, it is too fast.
352
00:12:47,917 --> 00:12:50,659
-It has to have a ballad tempo.-No, it doesn't.
353
00:12:50,702 --> 00:12:53,618
You seem to forget
that I am the tempo king.
354
00:12:53,662 --> 00:12:56,273
Oh, well, Your Majesty, please,may I take some tea with you
355
00:12:56,317 --> 00:12:58,058
and ask you to slow it down?!
356
00:12:58,101 --> 00:13:01,235
Nadja, if we slowed this down,it would stop forever and a day.
357
00:13:01,278 --> 00:13:03,237
NADJA:
I am now remembering why
358
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:05,892
me and Laszlo haven't
collaborated in decades.
359
00:13:05,935 --> 00:13:08,982
Because sometimes he can be
a giant dipshit with no taste.
360
00:13:09,025 --> 00:13:10,766
LASZLO: She does have a way with words,
361
00:13:10,810 --> 00:13:12,986
but sometimes those words
drive me fucking insane.
362
00:13:13,029 --> 00:13:14,335
NADJA:
You haven't had
363
00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:16,641
an original idea since 1925,
when you decided
364
00:13:16,685 --> 00:13:19,514
to go down on mefor the first time in 200 years.
365
00:13:19,557 --> 00:13:21,211
-Biggest mistake I ever made.
-[gasps]
366
00:13:21,255 --> 00:13:23,518
You said I tasted
like goats' cheese.
367
00:13:25,476 --> 00:13:27,000
Anyway, how dare you?
368
00:13:27,043 --> 00:13:28,088
I was doing the bloody disco
369
00:13:28,131 --> 00:13:30,090
a hundred years
before any other fucker.
370
00:13:30,133 --> 00:13:31,961
I gave you that idea.
Colin Robinson,
371
00:13:32,005 --> 00:13:33,484
this is a private conversation.
372
00:13:33,528 --> 00:13:36,052
Sorry, I-I just
wanted to pop in and say
373
00:13:36,096 --> 00:13:38,925
-be sure you do some new songs.-Why?
374
00:13:38,968 --> 00:13:42,972
Every time I go to a rock
concert and the singer says,
375
00:13:43,016 --> 00:13:45,105
"Okay, we're gonna take a breakfrom the hits and do
376
00:13:45,148 --> 00:13:48,108
some of our new material,"
the crowd goes bananas.
377
00:13:48,151 --> 00:13:50,023
-[grunting] -NANDOR: I have been wondering
378
00:13:50,066 --> 00:13:53,287
if perhaps I was
a little too relentless
379
00:13:53,330 --> 00:13:54,331
with Guillermo.
380
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:55,724
Get out of the way.
381
00:13:55,767 --> 00:13:58,466
Like all humans
approaching death,
382
00:13:58,509 --> 00:14:01,773
Benjy is mostly interested
in "jolf".
383
00:14:01,817 --> 00:14:03,775
-Watch the hips.
-Uh, yeah. Okay.
384
00:14:03,819 --> 00:14:05,952
Shoot...
Chop that thing!
385
00:14:05,995 --> 00:14:08,128
He's not as strong
as Guillermo,
386
00:14:08,171 --> 00:14:09,129
nor as quick.
387
00:14:09,172 --> 00:14:10,304
He's frail,
388
00:14:10,347 --> 00:14:11,783
like a baby.
389
00:14:11,827 --> 00:14:13,394
A big, wrinkly baby
390
00:14:13,437 --> 00:14:14,961
that smells of
391
00:14:15,004 --> 00:14:16,092
mashed potatoes.
392
00:14:16,136 --> 00:14:17,964
Let me do it.
393
00:14:18,007 --> 00:14:21,097
Sorry, Master. I'll be strongerwhen I'm a vampire.
394
00:14:23,186 --> 00:14:25,145
So I think I'll pay
Guillermo a visit.
395
00:14:25,188 --> 00:14:26,929
Watch out, there's a slippy bit.
396
00:14:26,973 --> 00:14:29,889
He must be dying
to come back by now.
397
00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:34,502
-Do you like my room?
-Uh, yes.
398
00:14:34,545 --> 00:14:37,287
It's very nice.
Big.
399
00:14:37,331 --> 00:14:39,159
-Is that me?
-No.
400
00:14:40,160 --> 00:14:41,988
-That's me.
-Nope.
401
00:14:42,031 --> 00:14:43,206
That's you.
402
00:14:43,250 --> 00:14:45,034
That's not...
403
00:14:45,078 --> 00:14:47,210
If I knew you liked
big rooms, you know,
404
00:14:47,254 --> 00:14:49,038
maybe I could've moved you
into the big blue room
405
00:14:49,082 --> 00:14:51,171
-upstairs in Staten Island.
-No.
406
00:14:51,214 --> 00:14:53,173
I don't need more room
at that house.
407
00:14:53,216 --> 00:14:56,916
You know, Celeste always comes
in here and just talks.
408
00:14:58,004 --> 00:15:01,790
Well, I like just talking, too.
409
00:15:01,833 --> 00:15:03,879
-Since when?
-Since...
410
00:15:05,881 --> 00:15:07,404
-Since...
-Okay.
411
00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,406
I'm gonna go see what
everyone else is doing.
412
00:15:09,450 --> 00:15:12,235
-But I thought we were
just talking.
-We're not talking.
413
00:15:12,279 --> 00:15:14,107
[stammers]
414
00:15:14,150 --> 00:15:16,892
[dance music playing]
415
00:15:16,936 --> 00:15:18,981
The fuck is that shit?
416
00:15:19,025 --> 00:15:22,245
Ah! And the couch
over here but upright,
417
00:15:22,289 --> 00:15:24,595
-because that's how I sleep now.-Why are you being like this?
418
00:15:24,639 --> 00:15:25,901
-Come on.
-CELESTE:
All the young vampires
419
00:15:25,945 --> 00:15:26,989
are switching to couches.
420
00:15:27,033 --> 00:15:28,425
GUILLERMO:
These are my people now.
421
00:15:28,469 --> 00:15:30,993
Guillermo!
Come, practice.
422
00:15:31,037 --> 00:15:32,255
It's interpretive dance,
423
00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:34,040
so you need to be
telling a story
424
00:15:34,083 --> 00:15:35,389
using your body.
425
00:15:35,432 --> 00:15:37,913
Like Pam.
Good luck.
426
00:15:37,957 --> 00:15:39,219
You don't need to be doing that.
427
00:15:39,262 --> 00:15:40,829
Yes, I do.
428
00:15:40,872 --> 00:15:42,048
[coughs]
429
00:15:45,181 --> 00:15:47,053
Be kind to Guillermo.
430
00:15:47,096 --> 00:15:48,706
-CELESTE: What?
-Nothing.
431
00:15:48,750 --> 00:15:50,143
Sorry.
Can I get...
432
00:15:50,186 --> 00:15:54,016
You mind if I...
Just going to go this way.
433
00:15:54,060 --> 00:15:56,149
Fucking girl.
434
00:15:56,192 --> 00:15:58,499
MAN:
Why is that when I eat M&M'S,
435
00:15:58,542 --> 00:16:01,676
M&M'S thinks
that I have to be horny?
436
00:16:01,719 --> 00:16:05,027
Worked better at the Cellar.
Okay.
437
00:16:05,071 --> 00:16:06,463
-Thank you so much...
-Colin Robinson,
438
00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:08,857
what is an open mic night?
439
00:16:08,900 --> 00:16:12,165
It's a prestigious showcase
of top-level talent.
440
00:16:12,208 --> 00:16:14,036
They call it "open mic" because
441
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:16,952
they only open the mic
for the best of the best.
442
00:16:16,996 --> 00:16:19,041
-Naturally.
-So, we're gonna
switch things up
443
00:16:19,085 --> 00:16:21,087
with a little bit of music
for you right now.
444
00:16:21,130 --> 00:16:24,264
Coming at you from the deepest
part of Staten Island,
445
00:16:24,307 --> 00:16:27,093
-let's give a warm
Chop House welcome to...
-Oh.
446
00:16:27,136 --> 00:16:29,312
-...Lass...
-LASZLO: Laszlo, dickhead.
447
00:16:29,356 --> 00:16:32,272
Lassezlo undNadia.
448
00:16:32,315 --> 00:16:34,665
NADJA [chuckles]:
Hello, everybody.
449
00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:37,451
I'm Nadja, and this is Laszlo,
and we are Nadja and Laszlo,
450
00:16:37,494 --> 00:16:39,192
the human music group.
451
00:16:39,235 --> 00:16:40,802
[scattered applause]
452
00:16:46,112 --> 00:16:48,070
This is a love song
to my wife, Nadja.
453
00:16:48,114 --> 00:16:51,204
♪ You took my heart
like no one♪
454
00:16:51,247 --> 00:16:54,207
♪ In this town♪
455
00:16:54,250 --> 00:16:57,297
♪ In this town♪
456
00:16:57,340 --> 00:16:59,777
♪ When we make love♪
457
00:16:59,821 --> 00:17:03,346
-♪ We fly up and down♪
-♪ Up and down♪
458
00:17:03,390 --> 00:17:06,436
-♪ Up and down♪
-♪ Up and...♪
459
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:09,309
Ugh, the couch.
460
00:17:09,352 --> 00:17:10,875
I hate it now.
461
00:17:10,919 --> 00:17:13,008
Go. Fix it.
462
00:17:13,052 --> 00:17:15,010
Uh, Celeste?
Sorry to bug.
463
00:17:15,054 --> 00:17:16,925
You said you were gonna start
making us vampires, quote,
464
00:17:16,968 --> 00:17:19,971
"Hopefully within the week."
And that was last week.
465
00:17:20,015 --> 00:17:21,147
Is someone talking to me
right now?
466
00:17:21,190 --> 00:17:22,322
GUILLERMO:
That's actually true.
467
00:17:22,365 --> 00:17:24,150
You did say that.
And I don't want
468
00:17:24,193 --> 00:17:25,238
-to be a bugaboo.
-CELESTE: Bugaboo?
469
00:17:25,281 --> 00:17:27,109
But you know
what it's like for us.
470
00:17:27,153 --> 00:17:28,676
What is this, an ambush?
471
00:17:28,719 --> 00:17:30,330
BRAD:
Sort of, like, a timeline
472
00:17:30,373 --> 00:17:32,767
-would mean a l-lot.
-Okay.
473
00:17:32,810 --> 00:17:33,768
-Music!
-[music stops playing]
474
00:17:33,811 --> 00:17:35,726
I'm just making sure
that the vibe
475
00:17:35,770 --> 00:17:39,469
is right before I start
making all of you vamps.
476
00:17:39,513 --> 00:17:41,297
-Right?
-KAREN: Well,
477
00:17:41,341 --> 00:17:42,951
that's what you said last week.
478
00:17:42,994 --> 00:17:44,909
CELESTE:
Yeah, I'm still not feeling
the vibe, Karen.
479
00:17:44,953 --> 00:17:46,476
Okay. We just need
480
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,739
a change in energy. I think
it'll do us a lot of good.
481
00:17:48,783 --> 00:17:52,178
Right?
So, who's ready...
482
00:17:52,221 --> 00:17:53,527
for an orgy?
483
00:17:53,570 --> 00:17:55,050
Anyone?
484
00:17:55,094 --> 00:17:56,486
-Me.
-Anyone here?
485
00:17:56,530 --> 00:17:58,401
-I'll have an orgy.
-Yeah, I know you will.
-Let's go,
486
00:17:58,445 --> 00:18:00,229
-let's do it. Okay, let's do it.-KAREN: Do you want to...
-GUILLERMO: No.
487
00:18:00,273 --> 00:18:03,232
This song
is called "Transformation."
488
00:18:03,276 --> 00:18:05,669
-♪ Bat, bat, bat♪
-♪ Bat♪
489
00:18:06,670 --> 00:18:08,019
♪ Bat♪
490
00:18:08,063 --> 00:18:09,282
-♪ Bat, bat♪
-♪ Bat.♪
491
00:18:09,325 --> 00:18:11,414
♪ We're feeling
horny for blood♪
492
00:18:11,458 --> 00:18:13,982
♪ We're feeling horny for love♪
493
00:18:14,025 --> 00:18:15,853
♪ We're feeling horny
for love♪
494
00:18:15,897 --> 00:18:18,552
♪ We're feeling
horny for love.♪
495
00:18:18,595 --> 00:18:20,293
♪ Are you calling from afar?♪
496
00:18:20,336 --> 00:18:22,730
♪ No, I'm calling from my car♪
497
00:18:22,773 --> 00:18:24,514
♪ But how can that be?♪
498
00:18:24,558 --> 00:18:27,430
♪ Electronically♪
499
00:18:27,474 --> 00:18:31,304
♪ Cellular telephone craze.♪
500
00:18:31,347 --> 00:18:33,088
WOMAN:
Boo.
501
00:18:33,132 --> 00:18:34,307
CELESTE:
Prepare to orgy.
502
00:18:34,350 --> 00:18:36,439
Close your eyes,
503
00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:38,441
remember all of the criticism
504
00:18:38,485 --> 00:18:40,008
you had from me,
and just get rid of it.
505
00:18:40,051 --> 00:18:42,010
Get rid of it.
Throw it away.
506
00:18:42,053 --> 00:18:44,360
-[pounding on door]
-GIRL [in distance]: Celeste!
507
00:18:44,404 --> 00:18:46,797
-Oh, my God.
-Why is the door locked?
508
00:18:46,841 --> 00:18:48,234
Oh, shit, they're back!
509
00:18:48,277 --> 00:18:49,844
You guys got to get the fuck
out of here!
510
00:18:49,887 --> 00:18:52,542
-Go! Go! Run!
-[indistinct chatter]
511
00:18:52,586 --> 00:18:55,458
Um, Master, uh, I thoughtyou wouldn't be back for, like,
512
00:18:55,502 --> 00:18:57,765
-another month.
-Do you have people over?
513
00:18:57,808 --> 00:19:00,289
-[snarls]
-You're not a real vampire,
are you?
514
00:19:00,333 --> 00:19:02,291
She was never gonna make me
a fucking vampire, okay?
515
00:19:02,335 --> 00:19:03,466
I just had to know
what it felt like.
516
00:19:05,294 --> 00:19:06,339
[all shrieking]
517
00:19:06,382 --> 00:19:07,992
CELESTE:
Welcome home, Master.
518
00:19:08,036 --> 00:19:10,256
I brought you these mortals.
519
00:19:10,299 --> 00:19:12,345
Are you pleased?
[screams]
520
00:19:12,388 --> 00:19:14,347
LASZLO:
This next one is a favorite
521
00:19:14,390 --> 00:19:16,610
of the fella
that my wife and I live with.
522
00:19:16,653 --> 00:19:17,915
He's called Nandor,
523
00:19:17,959 --> 00:19:20,918
and this is called
"Let's Do the Disco."
524
00:19:20,962 --> 00:19:23,921
-♪
-[audience booing]
525
00:19:23,965 --> 00:19:26,359
-♪ Do the disco♪
-Okay, get off the stage!
526
00:19:26,402 --> 00:19:28,578
LASZLO:
♪ In New York City.♪
527
00:19:28,622 --> 00:19:31,233
-[screaming]
-Guillermo! Save Sam!
528
00:19:31,277 --> 00:19:32,626
Save Sam!
529
00:19:35,411 --> 00:19:37,457
Don't look back, Sam.
Don't look back.
530
00:19:37,500 --> 00:19:38,893
-[exclaims]
-[Sam meows]
531
00:19:38,936 --> 00:19:40,373
[audience booing, clamoring]
532
00:19:40,416 --> 00:19:42,375
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
533
00:19:42,418 --> 00:19:43,854
Hey, you can't do that!
534
00:19:43,898 --> 00:19:46,248
-Fuck you!
-[booing]
535
00:19:46,292 --> 00:19:48,032
-The show was going terribly.
-So,
536
00:19:48,076 --> 00:19:51,166
we played "The Seafaring Song"
from 1792.
537
00:19:51,210 --> 00:19:53,037
-[audience jeering]
-[clears throat]
538
00:19:53,081 --> 00:19:55,301
-MAN: Boo!
-♪
539
00:19:55,344 --> 00:19:56,954
♪ Aruba, Jamaica♪
540
00:19:56,998 --> 00:19:59,174
♪ Ooh, I wanna take ya♪
541
00:19:59,218 --> 00:20:01,394
♪ Bermuda, Bahama♪
542
00:20:01,437 --> 00:20:03,047
♪ Come on, pretty mama...♪
543
00:20:03,091 --> 00:20:04,397
And that got them
544
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:05,528
really going.
545
00:20:05,572 --> 00:20:07,835
-How do they know the words?
-No idea.
546
00:20:07,878 --> 00:20:10,490
♪ Down on the Florida Keys...♪
547
00:20:10,533 --> 00:20:12,492
[woman whoops]
548
00:20:12,535 --> 00:20:16,060
♪ There's a place
called Kokomo♪
549
00:20:16,104 --> 00:20:18,976
♪ That's where we wanna go.♪
550
00:20:19,020 --> 00:20:21,414
-We killed.
-Well, we literally did.
551
00:20:21,457 --> 00:20:22,980
We killed some of them
at the end.
552
00:20:23,024 --> 00:20:24,547
Such a magical evening.
553
00:20:24,591 --> 00:20:25,896
-Run, Sam. Run!
-[meows]
554
00:20:25,940 --> 00:20:27,768
[panting]
555
00:20:27,811 --> 00:20:29,422
-Guillermo.
-[screams]
556
00:20:29,465 --> 00:20:31,424
I was at the orgy, and e...
and everyone was attacked,
557
00:20:31,467 --> 00:20:32,642
-and they're all dead.
-I don't want to know
about that.
558
00:20:32,686 --> 00:20:35,428
Stop gloating.
Very difficult for me to say,
559
00:20:35,471 --> 00:20:37,299
so just let me get this out.
560
00:20:37,343 --> 00:20:41,216
I know how happy you are
with this Celeste,
561
00:20:41,260 --> 00:20:44,611
but I have been very unhappy
since you left.
562
00:20:46,003 --> 00:20:48,441
I just want to know
what I can do
563
00:20:48,484 --> 00:20:50,225
to bring you back home.
564
00:20:50,269 --> 00:20:52,140
Oh.
565
00:20:52,183 --> 00:20:53,533
Well,
566
00:20:53,576 --> 00:20:55,186
I want to feel more respected
567
00:20:55,230 --> 00:20:56,579
and appreciated.
568
00:20:56,623 --> 00:20:58,973
And I want a day off.
569
00:20:59,016 --> 00:21:01,802
-What, like, every year?
-No.
570
00:21:01,845 --> 00:21:05,545
-Celeste would give us
a day off each week.
-What?
571
00:21:05,588 --> 00:21:07,416
She dresses herself that day?
572
00:21:07,460 --> 00:21:09,113
Like some cave pig?
573
00:21:09,157 --> 00:21:10,506
Yeesh.
574
00:21:10,550 --> 00:21:13,596
-Okay, fine. Once a week.
-And better snacks.
575
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:15,032
What's wrong with the ice chips?
576
00:21:15,076 --> 00:21:17,208
-Ice is not a snack.
-Disagree.
577
00:21:17,252 --> 00:21:18,471
But I'm not much of a snacker.
578
00:21:18,514 --> 00:21:19,950
Am I not a good familiar to you?
579
00:21:20,995 --> 00:21:22,823
You're a great familiar.
580
00:21:22,866 --> 00:21:25,478
Thank you. So you'll make me
into a vampire.
581
00:21:25,521 --> 00:21:27,436
-Did I promise that?
-You did.
582
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:29,133
-11 years ago.-I don't... That's a long time.
583
00:21:29,177 --> 00:21:30,918
-That's a long time. You did.
-I... Did I really, though?
584
00:21:30,961 --> 00:21:32,441
-I may have been talking
in my sleep.
-11 years. I've been here
585
00:21:32,485 --> 00:21:34,008
-for 11 years, all right?
-Okay, well, you know...
586
00:21:34,051 --> 00:21:35,444
-You know,
maybe Celeste would want me.
-Okay, okay, fine.
587
00:21:35,488 --> 00:21:37,490
I promise.
588
00:21:37,533 --> 00:21:39,622
[sighs]
I can't say when, but...
589
00:21:39,666 --> 00:21:41,842
I will.
Okay?
590
00:21:41,885 --> 00:21:44,540
You want to come back or not?
591
00:21:44,584 --> 00:21:47,282
-That's not necessary.
-Oh. I thought...
592
00:21:47,326 --> 00:21:49,110
-I got a feeling
that it was okay.
-It's not.
593
00:21:50,198 --> 00:21:52,635
-I got you this.
-Aw.
594
00:21:52,679 --> 00:21:55,508
-It's for beating off purposes.-Mm.
595
00:21:55,551 --> 00:21:57,510
-Wow.
-Come now, Guillermo.
596
00:21:57,553 --> 00:21:59,555
Assume the position.
597
00:22:01,078 --> 00:22:02,863
Ready?
598
00:22:02,906 --> 00:22:04,212
[grunts]
599
00:22:04,255 --> 00:22:06,170
[Guillermo whoops]
600
00:22:06,214 --> 00:22:07,563
Aw.
601
00:22:07,607 --> 00:22:09,870
NANDOR:
I'm not going back to get it.
602
00:22:09,913 --> 00:22:12,525
♪ When I meet my maker♪
603
00:22:12,568 --> 00:22:14,614
♪ Oh, it's just so fun♪
604
00:22:14,657 --> 00:22:17,530
♪ Yeah, I'm gonna tell him♪
605
00:22:17,573 --> 00:22:19,880
♪ Where he went wrong...♪
606
00:22:19,923 --> 00:22:22,448
-BENJY: Where are we?
-NANDOR: I don't know.
607
00:22:22,491 --> 00:22:25,625
-But it's your home now.
-BENJY: Okay.
608
00:22:25,668 --> 00:22:27,409
NANDOR: Guillermo, step on it.
609
00:22:27,453 --> 00:22:28,628
GUILLERMO: You're just gonna
leave him here?
610
00:22:28,671 --> 00:22:30,499
-NANDOR: Drive.
-BENJY: Bye.
611
00:22:30,543 --> 00:22:32,240
NANDOR:
Hey, look where you're going.
612
00:22:32,283 --> 00:22:34,242
[chuckles]
613
00:22:34,285 --> 00:22:37,637
[screams]
614
00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:41,336
LASZLO:♪ You took my heart
like no one♪
615
00:22:41,380 --> 00:22:44,557
LASZLO & NADJA:
♪ In this town♪
616
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,690
♪ In this town♪
617
00:22:47,734 --> 00:22:50,563
♪ In this
town♪
618
00:22:50,606 --> 00:22:54,523
NADJA:♪ Tonight♪
-LASZLO:♪ When we make love
we fly♪
619
00:22:54,567 --> 00:22:58,048
LASZLO & NADJA:♪ Up and down♪
620
00:22:58,092 --> 00:23:01,661
♪ Up and down♪
621
00:23:01,704 --> 00:23:04,490
♪ Up and
down♪
622
00:23:04,533 --> 00:23:08,450
♪ Tonight.♪
623
00:23:08,494 --> 00:23:10,539
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
44943
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