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1
00:01:56,453 --> 00:01:59,372
So he wants to cut it off
just like that?
2
00:02:01,791 --> 00:02:04,085
He doesn't think
you can handle it.
3
00:02:05,295 --> 00:02:07,379
The arrangements have been concluded.
4
00:02:07,463 --> 00:02:12,092
I gave them my word
because he gave me his word.
5
00:02:12,176 --> 00:02:13,928
Tell me why.
6
00:02:13,968 --> 00:02:16,262
You know why.
7
00:02:18,514 --> 00:02:20,933
You're not strong anymore.
8
00:02:22,017 --> 00:02:23,602
You lost control.
9
00:02:25,896 --> 00:02:30,107
You tell him this.
Nothing has changed.
10
00:02:30,192 --> 00:02:34,153
We've had a few setbacks.
That's to be expected in any business.
11
00:02:34,237 --> 00:02:38,573
But I am still in charge,
and I am still strong!
12
00:02:38,615 --> 00:02:40,575
Make no mistake.
13
00:02:40,617 --> 00:02:44,828
You tell him
he had better keep his word.
14
00:02:44,913 --> 00:02:47,790
Tell him the 25th as agreed.
15
00:02:49,124 --> 00:02:53,837
I'll send him a sign,
a little demonstration...
16
00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:57,173
to prove that I'm still strong.
17
00:03:38,543 --> 00:03:41,003
- Good afternoon, Mr. Douvier.
- Good afternoon, Simone.
18
00:03:47,134 --> 00:03:49,510
- Any calls?
- On your desk.
19
00:03:59,144 --> 00:04:01,063
What's this "Dr. Herb called"?
20
00:04:01,146 --> 00:04:03,939
That's your yearly checkup,
Tuesday at 4:30.
21
00:04:04,024 --> 00:04:06,817
Okay. Is New York going to call back?
22
00:04:06,860 --> 00:04:08,944
Between 5:00 and 6:00.
23
00:04:09,029 --> 00:04:11,655
Good.
Everybody else here?
24
00:04:11,697 --> 00:04:13,740
Yes. In the boardroom.
25
00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:28,212
I don't think we should
keep them waiting any longer.
26
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,470
- Will I see you tonight?
- Of course, Miss Le Gree.
27
00:04:52,274 --> 00:04:54,735
Gentlemen, we have a problem.
28
00:04:54,818 --> 00:04:56,862
The Gannet transaction
is in jeopardy...
29
00:04:56,945 --> 00:04:59,906
because New York seems to feel
I no longer have...
30
00:04:59,990 --> 00:05:02,407
the power to control
the situation.
31
00:05:02,450 --> 00:05:05,410
So I have sent word...
32
00:05:05,452 --> 00:05:10,915
that I will give them
a demonstration, a sign...
33
00:05:10,958 --> 00:05:14,585
to show that I am still in control.
34
00:05:14,669 --> 00:05:17,380
That France is still
a viable territory.
35
00:05:18,589 --> 00:05:21,884
What I want from you,
are suggestions.
36
00:05:23,260 --> 00:05:25,387
I have an idea.
37
00:05:25,469 --> 00:05:26,930
All right.
38
00:05:26,972 --> 00:05:30,559
Would you ask your secretary
to bring in the morning paper?
39
00:05:32,976 --> 00:05:36,854
- Would you bring in the morning paper?
- Right away, sir.
40
00:05:41,401 --> 00:05:44,070
Who is the most important man
in France today?
41
00:05:44,153 --> 00:05:46,446
Present company excluded, of course.
42
00:05:46,531 --> 00:05:48,073
Thank you.
43
00:05:48,156 --> 00:05:51,242
- The president, I suppose.
- For our purpose.
44
00:05:51,326 --> 00:05:55,163
A man New York knows even better
than the president of France.
45
00:05:55,246 --> 00:05:59,417
A man with which our entire
world organization is familiar...
46
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:02,294
and would like nothing better
than to see him out of the way.
47
00:06:02,378 --> 00:06:04,170
Who?
48
00:06:08,216 --> 00:06:11,802
Who has given us nothing but trouble
for the past ten years?
49
00:06:11,887 --> 00:06:16,557
Who has survived
16 assassination attempts?
50
00:06:16,640 --> 00:06:19,851
Including two by his own boss.
51
00:06:24,772 --> 00:06:26,191
Clouseau.
52
00:06:26,273 --> 00:06:30,777
You want to impress New York,
eliminate Clouseau.
53
00:06:30,819 --> 00:06:33,988
Eliminate Clouseau and we'll have
every cop in France down on our necks.
54
00:06:34,072 --> 00:06:36,324
Not if we do it smart.
55
00:06:36,407 --> 00:06:40,119
There is a rumor
that he is really a complete imbecile.
56
00:06:40,161 --> 00:06:41,621
I've heard that.
57
00:06:41,661 --> 00:06:43,997
Yet he continues to survive.
58
00:06:44,040 --> 00:06:48,126
I have it on good authority
that he is anything but an imbecile.
59
00:06:48,167 --> 00:06:50,836
That he only plays at the fool.
60
00:06:52,046 --> 00:06:55,466
In any case, it is too dangerous.
61
00:07:00,137 --> 00:07:02,055
Can you do it smart?
62
00:07:03,264 --> 00:07:04,723
Yes.
63
00:07:05,475 --> 00:07:06,809
Do it.
64
00:12:23,086 --> 00:12:25,088
Balls?
65
00:12:25,172 --> 00:12:28,842
Inspector Clouseau!
My dear Chief lnspector Clouseau!
66
00:12:28,925 --> 00:12:32,302
How I have missed you!
How we have missed you!
67
00:12:32,345 --> 00:12:36,306
Your disguise is ready for the
final fitting. You'll be very pleased.
68
00:12:36,348 --> 00:12:39,643
Cunny! Quick! Quick!
lnspector Clouseau is here!
69
00:12:39,726 --> 00:12:41,686
I noticed you have
some very interesting new noses.
70
00:12:41,769 --> 00:12:45,189
I will model them for you.
Cunny, get on with it!
71
00:12:45,273 --> 00:12:48,192
I will bring you one right away.
72
00:12:48,276 --> 00:12:50,694
- There were some on the left.
- Yes, yes.
73
00:12:50,777 --> 00:12:52,696
The final fitting.
74
00:12:52,779 --> 00:12:56,532
I call this one "Wino and Roses."
75
00:13:03,497 --> 00:13:08,293
Magnificent.
Even though I say so myself.
76
00:13:08,334 --> 00:13:10,670
This is no small feat.
77
00:13:10,753 --> 00:13:14,798
Now you can work the Left Bank
and Montmartre with anonymity.
78
00:13:14,883 --> 00:13:19,761
Yes. The old anonymity ploy.
79
00:13:26,017 --> 00:13:30,103
That's it!
You can do it, lnspector!
80
00:13:30,187 --> 00:13:31,856
Chief lnspector.
81
00:13:31,938 --> 00:13:36,109
You can walk, Chief lnspector.
You can walk!
82
00:13:37,194 --> 00:13:38,986
Yes! Yes!
83
00:13:39,028 --> 00:13:41,530
You are a genius, Balls.
84
00:13:41,572 --> 00:13:45,868
I can! I can walk!
85
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:53,707
Thank heavens
86
00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:58,253
For little girls
87
00:13:58,337 --> 00:14:03,425
They keep on getting smaller
every day
88
00:14:17,645 --> 00:14:19,063
Yes?
89
00:14:19,147 --> 00:14:21,566
A special delivery.
90
00:14:23,234 --> 00:14:24,652
Thank you.
91
00:14:27,363 --> 00:14:30,031
I'm sorry. I'm a little short.
92
00:14:30,073 --> 00:14:31,533
Forget it.
93
00:14:41,667 --> 00:14:43,794
Special delivery. A bomb.
94
00:14:43,877 --> 00:14:45,920
Were you expecting one?
95
00:14:46,879 --> 00:14:48,631
A bomb?
96
00:15:06,856 --> 00:15:08,399
Yes?
97
00:15:10,358 --> 00:15:11,776
What?
98
00:15:16,947 --> 00:15:18,407
Right.
99
00:15:18,449 --> 00:15:21,493
What's the matter?
100
00:15:21,577 --> 00:15:25,496
The bomb destroyed half the block,
and Clouseau survived.
101
00:15:25,580 --> 00:15:29,584
I am certain, sir,
that the bomb was intended for me.
102
00:15:29,625 --> 00:15:31,627
- Bomb?
- What?
103
00:15:31,711 --> 00:15:34,504
- You said, "bomb."
- Yes, yes.
104
00:15:34,589 --> 00:15:36,881
Fortunately, Professor Balls...
105
00:15:36,965 --> 00:15:40,802
took refuge behind a new shipment
of inflatable goiters...
106
00:15:40,885 --> 00:15:43,012
which cushioned the force
of the explosion.
107
00:15:43,096 --> 00:15:44,763
Inflatable goiters?
108
00:15:44,804 --> 00:15:47,807
Yes. His Valentine's Day collection.
109
00:15:49,642 --> 00:15:51,561
It's amazing that you survived.
110
00:15:51,644 --> 00:15:53,104
Yes, yes.
111
00:15:53,146 --> 00:15:55,898
I must apprehend this mad bomber...
112
00:15:55,982 --> 00:15:58,775
before he does any more
of the damage in here.
113
00:15:58,818 --> 00:16:00,360
Or she.
114
00:16:00,444 --> 00:16:03,280
- "Or she"?
- A man dressed as a woman.
115
00:16:07,992 --> 00:16:10,787
"Four armed robberies in three weeks.
116
00:16:10,828 --> 00:16:14,207
Two of the victims were assaulted
and grappled with the robber.
117
00:16:14,289 --> 00:16:18,168
Both the victims felt the robber
was much too strong to be a woman.
118
00:16:19,628 --> 00:16:23,380
Three years ago, we sent to prison
a man named Claude Russo.
119
00:16:23,464 --> 00:16:27,300
Russo committed robberies
disguised as a woman."
120
00:16:27,343 --> 00:16:30,970
Well, sir,
I must be off to apprehend...
121
00:16:31,012 --> 00:16:34,265
this mad bomber now.
122
00:16:34,349 --> 00:16:37,894
Remember, it just could be Russo.
123
00:16:37,977 --> 00:16:40,646
Yes, it just could be Russo. Yes.
124
00:16:40,729 --> 00:16:44,148
- Yes. I just said that.
- Yes, I know that. Yes, sir.
125
00:16:44,191 --> 00:16:48,528
Well, sir, until we meet again,
and the case is solved.
126
00:16:55,075 --> 00:16:56,326
Fire!
127
00:17:13,341 --> 00:17:15,593
You may not have seen
these gentlemen before...
128
00:17:15,677 --> 00:17:18,262
but they have at one time or another
worked for you.
129
00:17:18,346 --> 00:17:20,722
And needless to say,
they are specialists.
130
00:17:20,765 --> 00:17:22,599
The best in France.
131
00:17:22,683 --> 00:17:25,561
And you expect them
to take care of Clouseau?
132
00:17:25,601 --> 00:17:29,397
Oh, no. They've been contracted
to eliminate Mr. Chong.
133
00:17:29,480 --> 00:17:31,232
Who is Mr. Chong?
134
00:17:38,238 --> 00:17:41,575
Mr. Chong was recommended
by Hong Kong.
135
00:17:48,247 --> 00:17:51,875
Gentlemen, fulfill your contracts.
136
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:31,462
Why don't you get out of those
wet clothes? You could catch pneumonia.
137
00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:33,464
Yes, I know that.
138
00:19:33,506 --> 00:19:38,219
I will as soon as I get home provided
idiot Cato does not attack me first.
139
00:19:38,301 --> 00:19:40,429
Why don't you tell him not to?
140
00:19:40,513 --> 00:19:42,681
Believe me, it's not that easy.
141
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:46,892
I gave him instructions to attack me
wherever and whenever possible.
142
00:19:46,976 --> 00:19:51,647
And it has now become a matter of pride
with him to try to outsmart me.
143
00:19:51,729 --> 00:19:55,651
I guarantee that at this very minute
his fiendish yellow brain...
144
00:19:55,692 --> 00:19:57,694
is plotting some new ambush.
145
00:20:02,364 --> 00:20:05,325
Yes, I know that.
146
00:21:03,085 --> 00:21:04,544
Cato?
147
00:21:28,148 --> 00:21:32,235
Pay attention!
This is your employer speaking.
148
00:21:32,276 --> 00:21:36,656
I am canceling the attack orders
for tonight.
149
00:21:36,738 --> 00:21:38,950
Do you understand?
150
00:21:39,032 --> 00:21:43,953
I know that I told you
to show no mercy...
151
00:21:44,037 --> 00:21:48,082
and to attack
and to pay no attention to what I say.
152
00:21:50,626 --> 00:21:52,044
But tonight--
153
00:21:56,464 --> 00:21:58,883
But tonight...
154
00:21:58,967 --> 00:22:02,762
I am ordering you
to pay attention!
155
00:22:06,390 --> 00:22:09,810
You will not attack, Cato!
156
00:22:17,984 --> 00:22:19,694
Shut up that row!
157
00:22:19,776 --> 00:22:23,280
I am trying to save my life,
madam.
158
00:22:30,662 --> 00:22:34,165
Obviously the little yellow slime
is not paying attention.
159
00:24:30,433 --> 00:24:33,894
It's a very substantial building,
but we're doing a great deal to it.
160
00:24:33,978 --> 00:24:37,939
I'm sure when it's finished,
you'll find it peaceful and delightful.
161
00:25:08,050 --> 00:25:10,092
Chief lnspector Clouseau's residence.
162
00:25:11,136 --> 00:25:13,387
One moment, please.
163
00:25:13,471 --> 00:25:15,056
For you.
164
00:25:28,817 --> 00:25:31,320
What on earth is going on?
165
00:25:31,361 --> 00:25:34,114
Excuse me, madame and messieurs.
166
00:25:34,198 --> 00:25:36,157
I beg your pardon.
I am so sorry.
167
00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,159
It's still for you.
168
00:25:38,201 --> 00:25:40,203
Chief lnspector.
169
00:25:40,286 --> 00:25:42,954
Pardon me.
I am needed on the phone.
170
00:25:48,668 --> 00:25:50,294
Hello?
171
00:25:50,337 --> 00:25:54,508
This is Chief lnspector Clouseau
speaking on the phone.
172
00:25:54,590 --> 00:25:57,426
Listen to me carefully.
173
00:25:57,509 --> 00:25:59,887
If you want to catch
the French Connection...
174
00:25:59,970 --> 00:26:01,888
meet me tonight at 11:00...
175
00:26:01,971 --> 00:26:05,350
in the Bois de Bologne
near the Grande Cascade.
176
00:26:05,432 --> 00:26:07,644
And come alone.
177
00:26:16,526 --> 00:26:20,863
That's so obvious,
he's bound to think it's a trap.
178
00:26:20,947 --> 00:26:25,826
Yes, or it's so obvious that he's bound
to think it can't be a trap.
179
00:26:25,867 --> 00:26:28,662
It's so obvious,
it's bound to be a trap.
180
00:26:28,745 --> 00:26:31,832
That is why you will never be
a great detective.
181
00:26:31,873 --> 00:26:34,500
It's so obvious,
it could not possibly be a trap.
182
00:26:34,583 --> 00:26:38,879
Now, Cato, warm up the Silver Hornet.
183
00:27:04,235 --> 00:27:06,737
I very much suspect...
184
00:27:06,778 --> 00:27:09,865
that the Hornet is overdue
for a service...
185
00:27:09,906 --> 00:27:12,784
so if you don't mind,
I'll use your car tonight.
186
00:27:33,343 --> 00:27:36,763
He's driving a white Peugeot.
License number is--
187
00:27:57,490 --> 00:28:00,493
By any chance,
are you going to Fontainebleau?
188
00:28:00,576 --> 00:28:01,826
Well--
189
00:28:01,911 --> 00:28:03,661
Wonderful!
190
00:28:05,705 --> 00:28:07,665
How lucky can a girl get?
191
00:28:07,748 --> 00:28:10,292
You're an absolute darling.
192
00:28:13,045 --> 00:28:14,838
It's green.
193
00:28:14,922 --> 00:28:16,340
It is?
194
00:28:16,423 --> 00:28:18,800
The traffic light.
195
00:28:27,642 --> 00:28:32,062
Generally speaking, it's dangerous
for a beautiful girl like you...
196
00:28:32,145 --> 00:28:34,481
to be hitchhiking at night.
197
00:28:34,522 --> 00:28:37,608
I know. That's because,
generally speaking...
198
00:28:37,650 --> 00:28:40,528
beautiful girls like me
don't carry guns.
199
00:28:40,611 --> 00:28:42,405
Yes, yes.
200
00:28:48,326 --> 00:28:52,121
Are you saying
that you carry a gun?
201
00:28:53,372 --> 00:28:56,959
I've got it in here somewhere.
It's not very big.
202
00:28:57,042 --> 00:28:59,001
Watch it.
It might go off.
203
00:28:59,044 --> 00:29:02,214
Only if you don't do
exactly what I say.
204
00:29:03,881 --> 00:29:05,341
Listen, Miss--
205
00:29:05,383 --> 00:29:07,509
Russo.
206
00:29:07,593 --> 00:29:10,554
But you can call me Claude.
207
00:29:15,100 --> 00:29:16,810
Pull off the road.
208
00:29:16,892 --> 00:29:20,646
Oh, the old "pull off the road" ploy!
209
00:29:20,688 --> 00:29:26,277
Yes. Then we will see how you do with
the old "take off your clothes" ploy.
210
00:29:55,552 --> 00:29:58,847
And if you don't want
to freeze to death, put on the dress.
211
00:29:58,888 --> 00:29:59,972
Never!
212
00:30:00,056 --> 00:30:03,517
Suit yourself.
But the dress is an original Dior...
213
00:30:03,601 --> 00:30:06,561
and you've got sensational legs.
214
00:30:47,138 --> 00:30:48,598
Yes?
215
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:53,519
Oh. Good. Thank you.
216
00:30:53,603 --> 00:30:55,854
Why don't you just take that
off the hook?
217
00:30:55,938 --> 00:31:01,276
Won't be necessary. The great lnspector
Clouseau won't be bothering us anymore.
218
00:31:08,657 --> 00:31:11,118
Hello, boys!
219
00:31:11,201 --> 00:31:13,620
Am I glad to see you!
220
00:31:13,662 --> 00:31:17,623
And we are certainly glad
to see you.
221
00:31:19,291 --> 00:31:21,252
Wait a moment!
You know me.
222
00:31:21,293 --> 00:31:23,587
I'm Chief lnspector Clouseau
of the surete.
223
00:31:23,670 --> 00:31:25,631
And I am Officer Bardot.
224
00:31:25,715 --> 00:31:28,009
But you can call me Brigitte.
225
00:31:28,091 --> 00:31:31,593
Listen, Brigitte. You are making
an understandable mistake.
226
00:31:31,636 --> 00:31:34,973
Don't let my legs fool you.
I'm really a man. Listen!
227
00:31:38,017 --> 00:31:42,103
The palace flag is lowered
to half-mast.
228
00:31:43,439 --> 00:31:46,941
The president has declared a day
of national mourning.
229
00:31:47,984 --> 00:31:50,152
Only a few hours ago...
230
00:31:50,236 --> 00:31:53,780
the great detective stood
in this very courtyard...
231
00:31:53,864 --> 00:31:55,824
and was decorated by the president...
232
00:31:55,866 --> 00:31:57,993
for outstanding service
to his country.
233
00:31:59,995 --> 00:32:02,330
According to the coroner's report...
234
00:32:02,371 --> 00:32:05,916
Chief lnspector Clouseau
was probably dead...
235
00:32:05,999 --> 00:32:09,461
before his car hit the telephone pole...
236
00:32:09,503 --> 00:32:11,379
and burst into flames.
237
00:32:15,382 --> 00:32:18,761
The president called me at 6:00
this morning.
238
00:32:18,844 --> 00:32:22,514
A dozen countries have offered the
services of their finest detectives...
239
00:32:22,597 --> 00:32:25,016
but the president
made it painfully clear...
240
00:32:25,099 --> 00:32:27,977
that this must be solved by Frenchmen,
and quickly...
241
00:32:28,019 --> 00:32:30,021
or we can all hand in
our resignations.
242
00:32:30,104 --> 00:32:32,314
I spoke with Dr. Laprone
at the hospital...
243
00:32:32,398 --> 00:32:35,359
and he assures me that Dreyfus
is completely cured.
244
00:32:36,902 --> 00:32:38,487
It's amazing.
245
00:32:38,528 --> 00:32:41,198
I've seen some lunatics
in my time.
246
00:32:41,280 --> 00:32:44,700
They were all pikers compared
with Dreyfus. He was like a wild animal!
247
00:32:44,742 --> 00:32:46,994
Didn't he actually bite you?
248
00:32:47,035 --> 00:32:50,205
Oh, yes. On the leg.
249
00:32:50,288 --> 00:32:52,831
I had to take rabies shots
just in case.
250
00:32:52,874 --> 00:32:55,627
The doctor swears
that his recovery is complete.
251
00:32:55,709 --> 00:33:00,547
He said that in the last 12 hours,
Dreyfus has literally become a new man.
252
00:33:00,589 --> 00:33:02,716
Thank God for that because we need him.
253
00:33:02,800 --> 00:33:06,511
If anyone knows about Clouseau
and who might have murdered him...
254
00:33:06,594 --> 00:33:10,056
that man is former
Chief lnspector Charles Dreyfus.
255
00:33:10,972 --> 00:33:13,225
Isn't it fantastic, Doctor?
256
00:33:13,309 --> 00:33:17,813
Reinstated at my former rank
with no loss of pay or social benefits.
257
00:33:17,895 --> 00:33:21,525
Yes. It could actually be called
a psychic rebirth.
258
00:33:21,566 --> 00:33:24,568
I am in your debt.
I shall be eternally grateful.
259
00:33:24,652 --> 00:33:27,029
I only helped.
I led the way.
260
00:33:27,071 --> 00:33:30,741
But in the final analysis,
it was your victory, Charles.
261
00:33:30,824 --> 00:33:32,909
Our victory, Paul.
262
00:33:32,993 --> 00:33:35,412
But only at the expense of another.
263
00:33:35,495 --> 00:33:38,163
Huh? Oh, Clouseau, you mean.
264
00:33:38,248 --> 00:33:42,751
It could be said that he died
so that you might live.
265
00:33:42,834 --> 00:33:44,753
I wish I could feel sorry.
266
00:33:44,836 --> 00:33:46,755
You feel no guilt?
267
00:33:46,838 --> 00:33:48,548
None.
268
00:33:48,631 --> 00:33:51,591
To be honest,
when I first heard he was dead...
269
00:33:51,634 --> 00:33:53,593
there were a few moments...
270
00:33:53,678 --> 00:33:57,681
when I was actually convinced
I was in a state of grace.
271
00:33:58,932 --> 00:34:00,600
Is that wrong?
272
00:34:00,683 --> 00:34:03,312
It isn't a matter of right or wrong.
273
00:34:03,394 --> 00:34:05,396
Look, I hated him.
274
00:34:05,479 --> 00:34:08,941
He literally drove me out of my mind,
as you know.
275
00:34:08,983 --> 00:34:12,736
Isn't it natural that
I should feel happiness, even joy...
276
00:34:12,777 --> 00:34:17,615
at the thought of him being dead,
out of the way and gone forever?
277
00:34:17,698 --> 00:34:19,283
Natural, yes.
278
00:34:19,366 --> 00:34:22,578
But there is a danger
that such feelings might promote guilt.
279
00:34:22,619 --> 00:34:25,372
Clouseau could come back
and haunt you.
280
00:34:25,455 --> 00:34:28,291
- I have no guilt.
- Not now.
281
00:34:28,333 --> 00:34:33,171
Not ever. Clouseau is gone,
and I am free forever.
282
00:34:33,253 --> 00:34:35,298
Now, have a cigar.
283
00:34:35,380 --> 00:34:37,007
Thank you, Charles.
284
00:34:37,090 --> 00:34:39,468
I've made the necessary arrangements
for your release.
285
00:34:39,551 --> 00:34:42,720
The surete is sending a car
for you to be picked up at 5:30.
286
00:34:42,804 --> 00:34:45,515
Remember, you're on probation
for 12 months.
287
00:34:45,598 --> 00:34:49,185
If you have any problems,
call on me immediately.
288
00:34:49,268 --> 00:34:51,186
Thank you, Paul.
289
00:34:57,359 --> 00:35:00,194
Listen to me, Officer.
You are making a serious mistake.
290
00:35:00,277 --> 00:35:03,072
Unless you release me immediately,
I will personally see to it...
291
00:35:03,155 --> 00:35:06,783
that you are transferred to Martinique
where you will spend your career...
292
00:35:06,867 --> 00:35:09,827
writing traffic citations
and checking parking meters.
293
00:35:09,911 --> 00:35:13,830
The man who was killed in that car,
my car, uh, Cato's car, was not me.
294
00:35:13,915 --> 00:35:16,625
He was wearing my clothes, yes.
These are his clothes!
295
00:35:16,667 --> 00:35:19,002
I am Chief lnspector Jacques Clouseau.
296
00:35:19,086 --> 00:35:21,004
Miss or Missus?
297
00:35:21,087 --> 00:35:24,757
You fool! The president himself
when he decorated me said...
298
00:35:24,841 --> 00:35:27,718
"Clouseau, you are a man of courage."
299
00:35:27,802 --> 00:35:30,720
And he called me the greatest detective
in all of France.
300
00:35:30,805 --> 00:35:33,556
Charlatan! lmpostor!
301
00:35:33,641 --> 00:35:36,350
All right, calm down, Mr. Poirot.
302
00:35:36,434 --> 00:35:37,894
Poirot?
303
00:35:37,978 --> 00:35:42,731
Yes. Yes.
But you can call me Hercule.
304
00:35:42,815 --> 00:35:46,235
And I am the greatest detective
in all of France...
305
00:35:46,318 --> 00:35:48,320
the greatest in all the world.
306
00:35:54,658 --> 00:35:57,286
That man is obviously crazy.
307
00:35:57,369 --> 00:35:59,496
We do not use that word around here.
308
00:35:59,579 --> 00:36:03,041
- What do you normally use around here?
- Now, now!
309
00:36:03,124 --> 00:36:05,584
He is very now-now,
I can tell you that.
310
00:36:05,668 --> 00:36:07,628
Court order.
311
00:36:07,712 --> 00:36:11,047
I shall need your signature
on the transfer document.
312
00:36:15,719 --> 00:36:20,348
Ninety days comprehensive--
Thank you.
313
00:36:20,431 --> 00:36:22,808
Psychiatric examination.
314
00:37:01,551 --> 00:37:03,218
Peekaboo.
315
00:37:05,386 --> 00:37:07,513
Your car's at the entrance, lnspector.
316
00:37:16,438 --> 00:37:18,732
Good-bye, Chief lnspector Dreyfus.
317
00:37:29,825 --> 00:37:32,035
Good evening, Chief lnspector Dreyfus.
318
00:37:32,119 --> 00:37:34,496
Good evening, Francois.
319
00:37:38,750 --> 00:37:42,378
It's good to have you back on the job,
Chief lnspector.
320
00:37:42,462 --> 00:37:46,297
Is it true that you will personally take
charge of the Clouseau investigation?
321
00:37:46,340 --> 00:37:47,590
Yes.
322
00:37:47,675 --> 00:37:50,843
You must feel torn.
On the one hand, it is your duty...
323
00:37:50,928 --> 00:37:54,555
to send the guilty parties
to the guillotine for killing Clouseau.
324
00:37:54,639 --> 00:37:57,475
On the other hand...
325
00:37:57,516 --> 00:38:00,602
I'm sure you'd rather
congratulate them, eh?
326
00:38:01,770 --> 00:38:04,438
Can you imagine,
a state funeral for that idiot?
327
00:38:04,481 --> 00:38:07,858
The president, dignitaries
from all over the world will be coming.
328
00:38:07,943 --> 00:38:11,445
Why, there's a rumor
the pope might even show up.
329
00:38:11,487 --> 00:38:13,488
Pope?
330
00:38:14,823 --> 00:38:16,324
Pope?
331
00:38:16,408 --> 00:38:17,659
What?
332
00:38:17,742 --> 00:38:20,995
You said pope.
Do you have a cold?
333
00:38:21,079 --> 00:38:25,500
Yes, yes. I have the cold
in the chest, you know.
334
00:38:26,375 --> 00:38:29,627
You sound terrible.
Do you want me to send you a doctor?
335
00:38:29,712 --> 00:38:33,047
No, no. It's much better
than it sounds.
336
00:38:33,132 --> 00:38:36,676
Anyway, I want to go directly
to the Clouseau apartments...
337
00:38:36,759 --> 00:38:39,303
to commence the search
for the clues.
338
00:38:39,345 --> 00:38:40,804
Yes, sir.
339
00:39:07,995 --> 00:39:10,164
This is the Clouseau residence?
340
00:39:10,246 --> 00:39:11,498
Yes.
341
00:39:18,211 --> 00:39:23,717
This is also the residence
of the Clouseau manservant Cato Fong?
342
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:25,510
Yes.
343
00:39:25,551 --> 00:39:28,597
Then be so good as to tell him...
344
00:39:28,679 --> 00:39:32,516
that I wish to have speaks with him.
345
00:39:32,558 --> 00:39:37,396
Who shall I say wish to have speaks
with Mr. Fong?
346
00:39:38,939 --> 00:39:41,191
Tell him it is an old friend.
347
00:39:41,232 --> 00:39:43,943
Mr. Fong has many old friends.
348
00:39:44,027 --> 00:39:48,697
Listen, you, tell him
it is Chief lnspector...
349
00:39:50,615 --> 00:39:52,075
Clouseau.
350
00:39:52,158 --> 00:39:54,536
Why didn't you say so
in the first place?
351
00:39:54,577 --> 00:39:56,579
Please come in.
352
00:40:07,130 --> 00:40:08,589
Good evening...
353
00:40:08,674 --> 00:40:11,592
and congratulations!
354
00:40:11,677 --> 00:40:13,636
You are our first Caucasian...
355
00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:17,555
and that entitles you
to a 10% discount until midnight.
356
00:40:17,598 --> 00:40:21,268
- Who are you?
- Mrs. Wu. But you can call me Madam.
357
00:40:24,104 --> 00:40:26,939
- Yes?
- Inspector Clouseau.
358
00:40:26,981 --> 00:40:29,066
Please come in.
359
00:40:30,150 --> 00:40:32,611
- Welcome.
- Good evening.
360
00:40:32,652 --> 00:40:35,447
Please, make yourself at home.
361
00:40:36,864 --> 00:40:39,534
That man just called himself
lnspector Clouseau.
362
00:40:39,617 --> 00:40:41,536
It was Mr. Fong's idea...
363
00:40:41,618 --> 00:40:44,579
but personally I think
we should have a better password.
364
00:40:44,664 --> 00:40:46,123
Password?
365
00:40:53,421 --> 00:40:57,299
I demand to know exactly
what is going on in here.
366
00:40:57,341 --> 00:41:00,677
Just about anything
your little heart desires.
367
00:41:00,760 --> 00:41:03,471
But first,
why don't you relax?
368
00:41:03,555 --> 00:41:05,557
Give Benson your hat and coat...
369
00:41:05,639 --> 00:41:08,976
have a drink,
get to know the girls...
370
00:41:09,018 --> 00:41:11,186
and then when you are up to it...
371
00:41:11,270 --> 00:41:16,441
you can choose from a wide variety
of exciting little diversions.
372
00:41:19,319 --> 00:41:22,405
But I see that you already have
a preference.
373
00:41:32,830 --> 00:41:37,001
Allow me to introduce Tanya,
the lotus eater.
374
00:41:38,294 --> 00:41:40,211
What else does she do?
375
00:41:46,675 --> 00:41:49,929
I warn you, Tanya, the Easter lotus...
376
00:41:50,012 --> 00:41:53,307
I am opposed
to the women's libs.
377
00:41:54,349 --> 00:41:58,811
Man is the master,
and women's place is in the home.
378
00:42:00,229 --> 00:42:04,024
And another round-eye
bites the dust.
379
00:42:16,202 --> 00:42:17,662
Cato!
380
00:42:26,378 --> 00:42:28,921
Take your hands off me,
you Oriental fool!
381
00:42:29,004 --> 00:42:32,007
You are under arrest.
Anything you say will be taken down--
382
00:42:32,049 --> 00:42:34,259
Arrest? Arrest?
383
00:42:34,343 --> 00:42:37,512
You have the right to remain silent,
but let me tell you this.
384
00:42:37,553 --> 00:42:40,598
I am not your ordinary
run-of-the-mill transvestite.
385
00:42:40,682 --> 00:42:42,100
Say no more!
386
00:42:42,182 --> 00:42:44,102
What was that talk
about arresting us?
387
00:42:44,184 --> 00:42:46,853
-He was just kidding. Weren't you, boss?
-Boss?
388
00:42:46,937 --> 00:42:49,189
I used to work for him.
He used to be a cop.
389
00:42:49,272 --> 00:42:50,523
A cop?
390
00:42:50,607 --> 00:42:52,858
Tell them you were kidding, boss.
391
00:42:54,568 --> 00:42:59,197
Yes, he is right.
I was just kidding.
392
00:43:00,283 --> 00:43:02,492
Cross my heart...
393
00:43:02,576 --> 00:43:05,287
and hope to meet you again sometime.
394
00:43:05,370 --> 00:43:07,872
And you, madame...
395
00:43:07,955 --> 00:43:09,707
and you, too.
396
00:43:09,790 --> 00:43:12,376
You two should be ashamed
of yourselves.
397
00:43:12,458 --> 00:43:14,962
And you! I want to talk to you!
398
00:43:15,044 --> 00:43:19,549
- You come in here! Listen, now.
- Please, boss!
399
00:43:19,632 --> 00:43:21,467
I thought you were dead.
400
00:43:21,551 --> 00:43:25,429
As a tribute to my memory,
you open up...
401
00:43:25,512 --> 00:43:27,598
this Chinese nooky factory!
402
00:43:27,681 --> 00:43:30,308
I had to do something
to keep busy.
403
00:43:30,392 --> 00:43:35,146
Besides, a first-rate joint like this
can make 300,000, 400,000 a year!
404
00:43:38,398 --> 00:43:40,650
- Is that net?
- No, gross.
405
00:43:40,735 --> 00:43:44,445
But even so, a smart operator can
clear himself a couple hundred grand.
406
00:43:44,529 --> 00:43:46,907
And that ain't exactly chicken feed.
407
00:43:50,034 --> 00:43:54,288
And ten years on Devil's lsland ain't
exactly the chicken's feed, either...
408
00:43:54,370 --> 00:43:56,290
my greedy little yellow pimp.
409
00:43:57,373 --> 00:44:01,169
I'll have to close up anyway
now that you're alive.
410
00:44:01,252 --> 00:44:02,795
Yes, yes.
411
00:44:02,878 --> 00:44:07,341
Normally, that is precisely
what you would have to do.
412
00:44:07,424 --> 00:44:11,136
But these are not normal times.
413
00:44:11,218 --> 00:44:13,263
Someone has just tried to kill me.
414
00:44:13,346 --> 00:44:14,805
That's normal.
415
00:44:14,848 --> 00:44:18,309
But this time, that someone thinks
he has succeeded.
416
00:44:18,392 --> 00:44:22,812
Except for you and me,
the whole world believes that I am dead.
417
00:44:22,854 --> 00:44:26,900
And in this case,
death has its advantages.
418
00:44:29,485 --> 00:44:31,820
No one will know it is me...
419
00:44:31,904 --> 00:44:37,201
as I glide through the underworld
like a shadow.
420
00:44:39,285 --> 00:44:42,747
- Good evening, Commissioner.
- Charles!
421
00:44:46,709 --> 00:44:48,168
Thank you.
422
00:44:48,210 --> 00:44:51,797
I'm sorry to be late,
but as you must have heard...
423
00:44:51,880 --> 00:44:54,173
some lunatic was hiding in my closet.
424
00:44:54,257 --> 00:44:56,425
Yes. Russo.
425
00:44:56,509 --> 00:44:57,927
Russo?
426
00:45:01,179 --> 00:45:02,889
You remember.
427
00:45:02,974 --> 00:45:05,934
Why wouldn't I remember?
It was only three years ago.
428
00:45:06,017 --> 00:45:10,188
Of course. Claude Russo,
alias Claudine Russo.
429
00:45:10,271 --> 00:45:12,690
Armed robbery dressed as a woman.
430
00:45:12,774 --> 00:45:14,692
But he got five years.
431
00:45:14,774 --> 00:45:18,069
He was released on parole
three months ago.
432
00:45:18,153 --> 00:45:20,530
So it could have been Russo.
433
00:45:20,573 --> 00:45:22,782
He is clever.
434
00:45:22,865 --> 00:45:25,743
Clever enough to fool Francois?
435
00:45:25,826 --> 00:45:30,539
I like Francois, but fooling him
no longer constitutes...
436
00:45:30,621 --> 00:45:34,750
an act of more than average cleverness,
shall we say?
437
00:45:38,588 --> 00:45:41,799
I always thought
he was rather a good policeman.
438
00:45:41,883 --> 00:45:44,593
When he was my assistant,
he was a very good policeman...
439
00:45:44,676 --> 00:45:46,761
with a bright future.
440
00:45:46,845 --> 00:45:48,762
But then he was assigned to Clouseau.
441
00:45:48,847 --> 00:45:50,223
Now, Charles.
442
00:45:50,306 --> 00:45:53,350
- All that's in the past.
- Yes, of course.
443
00:45:53,393 --> 00:45:54,894
Tomorrow morning...
444
00:45:54,935 --> 00:45:59,689
when they plant him six feet deep
and shovel in the dirt...
445
00:46:01,107 --> 00:46:03,443
I shall be truly free.
446
00:46:03,526 --> 00:46:07,280
Unless he's figured out a way
to come back from the dead...
447
00:46:07,363 --> 00:46:12,367
nothing that anyone does or says about
him will ever make any difference again.
448
00:46:12,451 --> 00:46:15,661
- Shall we do some work?
- That reminds me.
449
00:46:17,788 --> 00:46:19,248
What is it?
450
00:46:19,290 --> 00:46:22,793
The chief thinks
that you should give the eulogy.
451
00:46:22,876 --> 00:46:25,128
- The what?
- The tribute.
452
00:46:25,212 --> 00:46:26,213
Me?
453
00:46:26,296 --> 00:46:29,798
- You knew him intimately.
- I hated him intimately.
454
00:46:29,883 --> 00:46:33,887
But you're the expert who's going
to track down his murderers.
455
00:46:33,969 --> 00:46:37,932
I'm the expert who would love
to kiss his murderers. Understand?
456
00:46:38,014 --> 00:46:41,184
The P.R. people loved the angle.
457
00:46:42,268 --> 00:46:44,562
Sacrilege! I won't do it.
458
00:46:44,646 --> 00:46:46,104
Politics.
459
00:46:46,147 --> 00:46:48,398
No. I'm a good Catholic.
460
00:46:48,482 --> 00:46:51,235
- So is the chief's wife.
- I don't care.
461
00:46:51,276 --> 00:46:55,948
- What's she got to do with it?
- She wrote the speech.
462
00:46:57,114 --> 00:46:59,075
Ladies and gentlemen...
463
00:46:59,158 --> 00:47:01,785
honored guests...
464
00:47:02,870 --> 00:47:04,455
dear friends...
465
00:47:05,998 --> 00:47:07,958
we are gathered here...
466
00:47:07,999 --> 00:47:11,835
to say good-bye to a, uh...
467
00:47:15,130 --> 00:47:17,174
a great man.
468
00:47:22,637 --> 00:47:26,558
Not only was he
a model police officer...
469
00:47:26,641 --> 00:47:29,268
a brilliant detective...
470
00:47:31,436 --> 00:47:35,399
admired and respected
by his fellow officers...
471
00:47:35,481 --> 00:47:40,194
and all those
who were fortunate enough...
472
00:47:41,320 --> 00:47:42,780
enough...
473
00:47:43,531 --> 00:47:45,532
enough to know him...
474
00:47:46,659 --> 00:47:48,618
he was above all else...
475
00:47:51,288 --> 00:47:53,205
a modest man.
476
00:48:10,305 --> 00:48:14,349
His kind will not pass this way again...
477
00:48:14,433 --> 00:48:17,143
and our loss is surely...
478
00:48:19,145 --> 00:48:20,563
heaven's gain.
479
00:48:32,365 --> 00:48:34,450
Present arms!
480
00:48:35,367 --> 00:48:36,827
Fire!
481
00:48:52,716 --> 00:48:55,510
- Get rid of that woman.
- We'll talk about it later.
482
00:48:55,552 --> 00:48:58,930
I want your answer now
or I sue for divorce.
483
00:48:59,013 --> 00:49:02,183
- I'm warning you.
- Are you going to have me killed?
484
00:49:33,085 --> 00:49:34,545
Gentlemen...
485
00:49:36,588 --> 00:49:38,923
you will be relieved to know
that our friend in New York...
486
00:49:39,007 --> 00:49:42,510
was very impressed
by our little demonstration.
487
00:49:42,594 --> 00:49:44,594
It was a good idea, Guy.
488
00:49:44,679 --> 00:49:47,390
The Gannet transaction is on again.
489
00:49:47,430 --> 00:49:50,058
-The same delivery date?
-Unless there is something I don't know.
490
00:49:50,101 --> 00:49:53,562
I spoke to Hong Kong.
They say the Gannet's on schedule.
491
00:49:55,188 --> 00:49:57,940
Good. That means
that this time next week...
492
00:49:58,024 --> 00:50:01,442
we can declare ourselves
a very healthy dividend...
493
00:50:01,527 --> 00:50:04,737
Ietting our international colleagues
know that the French connection...
494
00:50:04,822 --> 00:50:06,781
is back in business.
495
00:50:07,699 --> 00:50:12,369
I'll be at the farm. I do not want to be
contacted except in extreme emergency.
496
00:50:13,620 --> 00:50:15,038
Meeting adjourned.
497
00:50:22,461 --> 00:50:26,339
Guy, stick around.
I might need you.
498
00:50:26,424 --> 00:50:27,842
Right.
499
00:50:30,510 --> 00:50:33,680
Miss Le Gree, would you come in
for a moment, please?
500
00:50:46,065 --> 00:50:47,775
What's wrong with you?
501
00:50:49,319 --> 00:50:52,947
- We have to stop seeing each other.
- Your wife?
502
00:50:53,947 --> 00:50:57,451
That witch!
How long this time?
503
00:50:57,534 --> 00:50:59,619
I'm afraid permanently.
504
00:50:59,703 --> 00:51:02,330
Permanently?
505
00:51:03,497 --> 00:51:05,583
- Permanently?
- Yes.
506
00:51:05,666 --> 00:51:09,629
- She gave me an ultimatum.
- Like you have no choice in the matter.
507
00:51:09,669 --> 00:51:12,130
- I haven't.
- You have to. Get rid of her!
508
00:51:12,172 --> 00:51:15,133
- My own wife?
- Get rid of her. Out! Why can't you?
509
00:51:15,175 --> 00:51:17,176
She's got enough evidence
in her safety deposit box to ruin me.
510
00:51:17,260 --> 00:51:19,803
Her attorney has been told that
if anything accidental happens to her...
511
00:51:19,846 --> 00:51:21,805
to give her box
to the authorities.
512
00:51:21,846 --> 00:51:24,682
- Then get rid of the authorities.
- What do you think I am?
513
00:51:24,767 --> 00:51:27,685
Get rid of her attorney.
514
00:51:27,727 --> 00:51:31,856
- I couldn't afford the scandal.
- I'll show you a scandal.
515
00:51:31,940 --> 00:51:36,276
You know I don't love her.
I need her respectability.
516
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:38,487
- Permanently?
- Yes!
517
00:51:38,570 --> 00:51:42,532
Six years together, just washed up?
Just over with?
518
00:51:42,616 --> 00:51:46,244
- I'm afraid so. I'm sorry.
- That's just wonderful, isn't it?
519
00:51:46,326 --> 00:51:49,580
You obviously can't go on
being my secretary.
520
00:51:49,664 --> 00:51:52,916
I have deposited a substantial amount
of money in your bank account--
521
00:51:52,999 --> 00:51:54,918
- I don't want your money.
- What do you want?
522
00:51:55,001 --> 00:51:57,003
I don't know what I want.
523
00:51:59,213 --> 00:52:01,173
But I'll think of something!
524
00:52:15,686 --> 00:52:17,104
Leaving early?
525
00:52:17,187 --> 00:52:19,398
Later than you think, Mr. Algo.
526
00:52:28,197 --> 00:52:30,324
Something you want me to do?
527
00:52:32,576 --> 00:52:35,245
Not unless she decides
to be indiscreet.
528
00:52:35,328 --> 00:52:39,707
If you have to, be sure
you make it look like an accident.
529
00:52:45,713 --> 00:52:47,590
Ahoy!
530
00:52:47,672 --> 00:52:49,674
Ahoy, the skipper!
531
00:52:51,259 --> 00:52:54,387
Hello, up there in the fog.
532
00:53:05,813 --> 00:53:07,731
Don't worry.
533
00:53:07,773 --> 00:53:10,901
It's only an old salty
Swedish sea dog...
534
00:53:10,943 --> 00:53:13,987
out there from the salty seas,
you know.
535
00:53:17,282 --> 00:53:19,409
Pumpin' the air in the parrot.
536
00:53:22,328 --> 00:53:25,122
Naughty bird afraid of the fog.
537
00:53:35,339 --> 00:53:36,798
Swine leg.
538
00:53:43,888 --> 00:53:45,848
Hello, lnspector.
539
00:53:47,058 --> 00:53:49,268
Chief lnspector.
540
00:53:51,353 --> 00:53:55,190
I will keep under the covers.
No one must suspect a thing.
541
00:54:03,906 --> 00:54:06,658
What do you have of special interest...
542
00:54:06,742 --> 00:54:10,245
to my secret investigations?
543
00:54:10,328 --> 00:54:13,121
There's something big going down
at Le Club Foot.
544
00:54:13,997 --> 00:54:16,751
Le Club Foot? Remarkable.
545
00:54:16,834 --> 00:54:18,252
Keep your--
546
00:54:21,713 --> 00:54:23,798
Keep your eyes and ears peeled.
547
00:54:23,882 --> 00:54:26,008
Keep in constant contact.
548
00:54:26,092 --> 00:54:30,554
I am extremely grateful
for this excellent piece of information.
549
00:54:32,013 --> 00:54:34,432
Thar she blows!
550
00:54:36,351 --> 00:54:40,230
Once again, I thank you
for this most useful tip.
551
00:54:40,312 --> 00:54:44,441
And if there is anything
I can ever do to repay you--
552
00:54:44,525 --> 00:54:47,444
Now that you mention it,
Chief lnspector--
553
00:55:11,339 --> 00:55:14,801
Sixteen chests
on a dead man's rum
554
00:55:14,885 --> 00:55:18,138
Yo ho ho in the bottle
of the chest
555
00:55:18,221 --> 00:55:21,515
Drink to the devils
and some for the rum--
556
00:55:26,979 --> 00:55:28,897
Do it some more
557
00:55:28,981 --> 00:55:31,108
Yeah, give me some more
558
00:55:31,191 --> 00:55:34,152
All right
559
00:55:35,904 --> 00:55:38,448
Come on, yeah
Slide it
560
00:55:41,241 --> 00:55:43,034
Move 'em out
561
00:55:43,076 --> 00:55:45,078
Move 'em out
562
00:55:45,120 --> 00:55:48,706
If you mess around with women, boy
You wanna fix the trimmin'
563
00:55:52,627 --> 00:55:54,712
Better listen to me, cousin--
564
00:55:54,754 --> 00:55:56,922
She's coming in now.
565
00:56:01,259 --> 00:56:03,678
- Bonsoir, Vic.
- How you doing, Simone?
566
00:56:03,761 --> 00:56:05,930
Mr. Toledo, Mr. Vancouver.
567
00:56:06,013 --> 00:56:07,431
What's happening?
568
00:56:09,098 --> 00:56:11,392
You can show us to my usual table.
569
00:56:11,476 --> 00:56:13,812
How about something near the floor?
Easier for dancing.
570
00:56:13,895 --> 00:56:16,898
No, thank you.
I want my usual table.
571
00:56:22,778 --> 00:56:24,529
Is something wrong?
572
00:56:24,613 --> 00:56:27,240
It is Mr. Douvier's table,
ain't it, love?
573
00:56:27,282 --> 00:56:30,535
No, it really ain't, love, but if
you're worried about Mr. Douvier...
574
00:56:30,618 --> 00:56:32,537
why don't you give him a call?
575
00:56:32,620 --> 00:56:34,539
I wouldn't want you to get in trouble
with your boss.
576
00:56:34,622 --> 00:56:36,540
- He ain't my boss.
- He ain't?
577
00:56:36,623 --> 00:56:38,834
Then why you paying him
all that money every month?
578
00:56:38,917 --> 00:56:42,587
- That ain't cool, baby.
- You ain't seen nothing yet. Come on.
579
00:56:52,351 --> 00:56:54,561
Where we going?
580
00:56:53,878 --> 00:56:56,881
We don't want to be obvious. We've got
to make our entrance through the back...
581
00:56:56,881 --> 00:57:00,176
in disguise,
as I told you, you fool.
582
00:58:03,242 --> 00:58:05,828
Get up here.
583
00:58:07,370 --> 00:58:10,539
- It's a bakery.
- I know that.
584
00:58:10,539 --> 00:58:14,544
Come on. At least
you're not yellow anymore.
585
00:58:14,669 --> 00:58:17,088
This time I'm going to stand
on your shoulders.
586
00:58:17,131 --> 00:58:19,383
What good would that do?
587
00:58:19,425 --> 00:58:23,262
- Because I'm taller than you, you fool.
- Oh, yeah.
588
00:58:23,262 --> 00:58:25,264
Make a cradle.
589
00:58:28,559 --> 00:58:30,436
Get rid of that.
590
00:59:13,856 --> 00:59:15,856
I can't reach it.
591
00:59:15,899 --> 00:59:18,903
You'll have to find something
to stand on.
592
00:59:36,921 --> 00:59:40,174
All right! Let me see some, baby.
Come on.
593
00:59:40,216 --> 00:59:42,802
Do it, baby.
594
00:59:49,767 --> 00:59:51,352
Let me go!
595
00:59:53,646 --> 00:59:56,232
- Can you reach it?
- Yes.
596
01:00:13,416 --> 01:00:16,128
- Hey, are you okay?
- No.
597
01:00:16,211 --> 01:00:18,504
- You know something? You're terrific.
- What?
598
01:00:18,547 --> 01:00:22,092
You're terrific. You saved my life.
Come with me.
599
01:00:22,135 --> 01:00:24,261
- Where?
- Over here. I want to save your life.
600
01:00:24,387 --> 01:00:26,680
- Let's go. Come on.
- Oh, God.
601
01:00:40,862 --> 01:00:44,282
-Come with me before the killers see us.
-What killers?
602
01:00:44,407 --> 01:00:46,575
- I'll tell you at my apartment.
- What apartment?
603
01:00:46,700 --> 01:00:48,161
My apartment.
604
01:01:07,138 --> 01:01:09,557
Oh, my God!
605
01:01:09,599 --> 01:01:11,559
And mine, too.
606
01:01:11,602 --> 01:01:13,604
I'm soaked to the skin.
607
01:01:13,729 --> 01:01:18,025
Yes, I have received
considerable soak also.
608
01:01:23,447 --> 01:01:26,617
Get out of those wet clothes before
you catch your death of pneumonia.
609
01:01:26,617 --> 01:01:30,622
Yes. What shall I do with my coat?
I don't want to spoil your beautiful--
610
01:01:30,622 --> 01:01:34,041
Just put it down anywhere.
Put it on the floor. That's fine.
611
01:01:40,215 --> 01:01:41,633
Help yourself.
612
01:01:41,757 --> 01:01:44,636
I'm going to change.
I'll bring you a robe.
613
01:01:53,645 --> 01:01:56,189
I'm gonna put on some music.
614
01:02:05,949 --> 01:02:09,244
- You know, it's strange.
- What?
615
01:02:09,369 --> 01:02:12,372
I say, it's strange.
616
01:02:12,497 --> 01:02:14,542
Yes, I know.
And I said "what?"
617
01:02:14,667 --> 01:02:17,419
- You mean, what is strange?
- Yes.
618
01:02:19,254 --> 01:02:21,257
It's strange...
619
01:02:21,257 --> 01:02:25,970
that I have never yet
set foot in this building...
620
01:02:25,970 --> 01:02:30,559
but I have the distinct impression
that I have been here before.
621
01:02:31,976 --> 01:02:34,437
It's called deja vu.
I have it all the time.
622
01:02:34,520 --> 01:02:36,564
Yeah, deja vu.
Thank you.
623
01:02:36,564 --> 01:02:38,566
You're welcome.
624
01:02:38,691 --> 01:02:40,861
- You okay?
- Yes.
625
01:02:42,570 --> 01:02:44,573
That feels good.
626
01:02:46,158 --> 01:02:49,285
It's not going to do you much good
if you don't take your pants off.
627
01:02:49,285 --> 01:02:51,412
- What?
- Take your pants off.
628
01:02:51,455 --> 01:02:52,872
Forgot about those.
629
01:02:52,997 --> 01:02:54,999
Look at me.
630
01:02:54,999 --> 01:02:57,586
Look at my hands.
I'm shaking like a leaf.
631
01:02:57,753 --> 01:03:00,297
I can't stop shaking.
I know what it is.
632
01:03:00,422 --> 01:03:04,884
You know what it is?
I'm just not used to being killed.
633
01:03:05,009 --> 01:03:09,473
- That's my first time, you know?
- I know, but listen.
634
01:03:09,556 --> 01:03:14,603
When you have been killed as many times
as I have, you get used to it.
635
01:03:14,728 --> 01:03:17,607
- Really?
- Yes, oh, yes.
636
01:03:17,731 --> 01:03:20,567
Yes, indeed. I'll put this here.
637
01:03:20,609 --> 01:03:24,154
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
638
01:03:24,197 --> 01:03:28,033
- This is for you.
- Yes, of course.
639
01:03:28,158 --> 01:03:31,037
- Then this must be yours.
- Thank you. Cheers.
640
01:03:33,205 --> 01:03:34,623
Yes. Anyway--
641
01:03:37,210 --> 01:03:39,879
- You have nothing to fear.
- Yes, I have.
642
01:03:39,921 --> 01:03:41,923
- No, you don't.
- Yes, I have.
643
01:03:43,509 --> 01:03:48,805
No. You see, I am an officer
of the law.
644
01:03:48,889 --> 01:03:52,100
- The "lew"?
- What?
645
01:03:52,184 --> 01:03:56,230
You said you are an officer
of the "lew"?
646
01:03:56,230 --> 01:04:00,526
That is correct. Yes, yes.
I am Chief Inspector of the surete.
647
01:04:02,194 --> 01:04:03,947
What?
648
01:04:04,113 --> 01:04:06,366
You doubt me.
649
01:04:06,491 --> 01:04:10,660
No, I don't doubt you.
Why should I doubt you?
650
01:04:10,785 --> 01:04:13,914
- That's right. Why should you?
- If you say so, I don't.
651
01:04:13,957 --> 01:04:16,543
Who were those men
who tried to kill you?
652
01:04:16,543 --> 01:04:18,962
- Killers.
- How do you know?
653
01:04:19,128 --> 01:04:22,673
- Because they work for Douvier.
- Douvier? I know that name.
654
01:04:22,840 --> 01:04:26,218
Everyone in France knows that name.
He's a millionaire businessman.
655
01:04:26,260 --> 01:04:30,140
Yes, of course. Douvier the
millionaire businessman. I knew I knew.
656
01:04:30,265 --> 01:04:33,560
But, how many people
do you think know...
657
01:04:33,684 --> 01:04:38,272
that Douvier the millionaire businessman
is also Douvier the French connection?
658
01:04:38,397 --> 01:04:39,815
How many?
659
01:04:43,819 --> 01:04:46,448
I suppose his mother, for one.
660
01:04:46,531 --> 01:04:48,700
Why do you suppose he wanted
to have me killed?
661
01:04:48,825 --> 01:04:51,285
Elementary.
He wanted you dead.
662
01:04:56,708 --> 01:04:59,253
- You all right?
- I got singed.
663
01:04:59,295 --> 01:05:01,881
- I'm sorry about your robe.
- That's all right.
664
01:05:02,006 --> 01:05:04,425
Tell me about this Douvier.
665
01:05:06,302 --> 01:05:09,597
I was his mistress and
private secretary for two years.
666
01:05:09,597 --> 01:05:14,477
I know enough about Philippe to send him
to prison for his whole life.
667
01:05:17,480 --> 01:05:20,316
You keep talking about this Douvier.
668
01:05:21,483 --> 01:05:24,612
But who is Philippe?
669
01:05:24,737 --> 01:05:27,490
- Philippe Douvier.
- His son?
670
01:05:27,573 --> 01:05:29,451
Whose son? He has no son.
671
01:05:29,493 --> 01:05:31,786
- His brother then?
- His brother is Fred.
672
01:05:31,870 --> 01:05:34,205
- Then it has to be his father.
- His father's dead.
673
01:05:34,205 --> 01:05:36,208
Now we're getting somewhere.
Who killed him?
674
01:05:36,333 --> 01:05:40,628
- No one. He died of natural causes.
- Then who is this Philippe?
675
01:05:40,628 --> 01:05:44,215
I want to see some identification.
Right now.
676
01:05:44,340 --> 01:05:47,928
Right now.
I want to see some identification.
677
01:05:48,095 --> 01:05:51,514
If you're not a policeman, then I
shouldn't be telling you these things.
678
01:05:56,061 --> 01:05:59,523
- Can you keep a secret?
- I don't know. That depends.
679
01:06:01,358 --> 01:06:04,361
Brace yourself for what
I'm about to tell you.
680
01:06:05,238 --> 01:06:07,240
I am none other...
681
01:06:08,949 --> 01:06:12,829
then Staff lnspector
Jacques Clouseau.
682
01:06:12,911 --> 01:06:14,663
No, you're not.
683
01:06:14,831 --> 01:06:16,665
- Yes, I am.
- No, you're not.
684
01:06:18,543 --> 01:06:20,253
I am.
685
01:06:20,378 --> 01:06:21,796
You're not.
686
01:06:26,550 --> 01:06:28,428
Yes, you are.
687
01:06:29,386 --> 01:06:30,847
Oh, my God!
688
01:06:30,847 --> 01:06:33,266
I admit it's not
a good photograph, but--
689
01:06:33,391 --> 01:06:36,437
But I saw your funeral on television.
690
01:06:36,519 --> 01:06:37,980
Yes. Yes.
691
01:06:38,146 --> 01:06:40,565
Even the pope was there.
Cheers.
692
01:06:41,858 --> 01:06:44,569
But if you're not dead, who's dead?
693
01:06:46,863 --> 01:06:49,824
A wandering transvestite
took my car...
694
01:06:49,866 --> 01:06:52,579
and stole my clothes at gunpoint.
695
01:06:52,703 --> 01:06:56,414
I have been working under the covers
tracking the killer.
696
01:06:56,457 --> 01:06:59,001
- The killer's Douvier!
- What?
697
01:06:59,168 --> 01:07:01,295
He wanted to impress the godfather.
698
01:07:02,881 --> 01:07:07,176
What? You mean Douvier killed
a wandering transvestite...
699
01:07:07,301 --> 01:07:10,012
just to impress his godfather?
700
01:07:11,139 --> 01:07:12,723
The man's unthinkable.
701
01:07:12,766 --> 01:07:14,600
The door.
702
01:07:14,600 --> 01:07:18,146
- What's wrong with it?
- I saw the knob turn.
703
01:07:44,756 --> 01:07:46,174
Hurry.
704
01:07:47,050 --> 01:07:49,344
- I wonder whose apartment this is.
- I don't know.
705
01:07:53,099 --> 01:07:55,517
The other one's probably upstairs
waiting in my room.
706
01:07:55,643 --> 01:07:57,936
How do you know there's another one?
707
01:07:57,936 --> 01:08:01,107
Because assassins always travel
in pairs. It's a company rule.
708
01:08:01,190 --> 01:08:03,359
Do you know what
the Gannet Transaction is?
709
01:08:03,484 --> 01:08:05,653
The Gannet Transaction? What is that?
710
01:08:05,778 --> 01:08:10,115
It's a code name for
a 50-million franc heroin sale.
711
01:08:10,199 --> 01:08:12,201
50 million francs?
712
01:08:12,243 --> 01:08:15,370
Philippe's going to Hong Kong on Tuesday
to meet with the American buyer.
713
01:08:15,538 --> 01:08:16,956
Hong Kong.
714
01:08:17,081 --> 01:08:20,543
I don't know how it fits in,
but the Gannet's a boat.
715
01:08:28,217 --> 01:08:30,428
What are you doing?
716
01:08:33,222 --> 01:08:35,434
- I know why this place looks familiar.
- Why?
717
01:08:35,558 --> 01:08:37,561
Chief lnspector Dreyfus lives here.
718
01:08:42,273 --> 01:08:44,568
I think he has received a faint.
719
01:08:46,445 --> 01:08:49,448
Wake up, Chief lnspector.
Wake up.
720
01:08:49,573 --> 01:08:50,992
Chief lnspector?
721
01:08:51,868 --> 01:08:54,996
Hello? Are you in there,
Chief lnspector?
722
01:08:55,871 --> 01:08:57,290
Hello?
723
01:08:58,582 --> 01:09:01,878
There's no reply.
It's no use.
724
01:09:01,878 --> 01:09:03,880
We will have to go to Hong Kong
without him.
725
01:09:04,005 --> 01:09:05,839
- We?
- Yes.
726
01:09:05,881 --> 01:09:08,592
You, I and Cato,
who will translate for us.
727
01:09:08,718 --> 01:09:11,554
Not me. I am not going to Hong Kong.
728
01:09:11,597 --> 01:09:13,890
Are you kidding?
Douvier would shoot me on sight.
729
01:09:14,016 --> 01:09:16,601
Not if he doesn't recognize you.
And he won't.
730
01:09:16,726 --> 01:09:19,187
Why not?
731
01:09:19,187 --> 01:09:24,734
We will leave that
up to the great Balls.
732
01:09:24,777 --> 01:09:27,321
The great Balls?
733
01:09:28,488 --> 01:09:31,199
At your service!
734
01:09:31,325 --> 01:09:34,161
Please forgive the condition
of my establishment...
735
01:09:34,203 --> 01:09:37,039
but as the lnspector knows--
736
01:09:37,164 --> 01:09:40,042
- Chief lnspector knows--
- Auguste.
737
01:09:41,334 --> 01:09:43,211
So sorry. I beg your pardon.
738
01:09:43,337 --> 01:09:46,799
But as the Chief lnspector knows,
we were bombed.
739
01:09:46,924 --> 01:09:48,633
Sounds like you still are.
740
01:09:48,758 --> 01:09:52,346
Almost all my collection
was either destroyed or damaged.
741
01:09:52,471 --> 01:09:55,641
Starting Monday,
I have to have a fire sale.
742
01:09:56,643 --> 01:09:58,935
You could call it
"The Great Balls of Fire" sale.
743
01:09:58,935 --> 01:10:00,938
A catchy suggestion.
744
01:10:01,062 --> 01:10:02,481
Very good.
745
01:10:03,774 --> 01:10:05,192
Cunny!
746
01:10:11,532 --> 01:10:15,661
I can't tell you how good it is
to see that you are still alive.
747
01:10:15,787 --> 01:10:18,956
It has been my privilege
to serve the good lnspector...
748
01:10:18,956 --> 01:10:22,252
the Chief lnspector,
for, lo, this many years.
749
01:10:22,252 --> 01:10:24,671
Thirteen, to be precise.
750
01:10:24,671 --> 01:10:29,092
And his reported demise
was a real blow to me.
751
01:10:29,133 --> 01:10:31,219
Something's coming.
752
01:10:31,260 --> 01:10:34,139
Yes, Cunny, you are not dreaming.
753
01:10:34,264 --> 01:10:38,268
Our friend, our customer,
is alive!
754
01:10:38,268 --> 01:10:39,854
Hello, Cunny.
755
01:10:41,271 --> 01:10:44,817
Now, how can I serve you?
756
01:10:44,858 --> 01:10:48,278
Through wind and mud,
snow and hail...
757
01:10:48,278 --> 01:10:52,158
whether long or short,
dark or pale, remember...
758
01:10:52,283 --> 01:10:54,869
that when duty calls...
759
01:10:54,994 --> 01:10:57,121
you've got Balls.
760
01:11:00,708 --> 01:11:02,127
I gotta sit down.
761
01:11:02,168 --> 01:11:04,462
Yes, of course. Cunny! Quick.
762
01:11:04,544 --> 01:11:06,172
Please, please, please.
763
01:11:06,172 --> 01:11:08,591
Come along. That's right.
There you are.
764
01:11:08,716 --> 01:11:13,305
- Sit. Come, come, come. Sit, sit.
- You're not serious.
765
01:11:13,305 --> 01:11:16,016
There has been no time
to get new furniture.
766
01:11:16,016 --> 01:11:19,310
Believe me, since the blast,
he's much more comfortable.
767
01:11:19,435 --> 01:11:21,020
Please sit.
768
01:11:21,020 --> 01:11:23,564
Matter of fact,
I've been sleeping on him.
769
01:11:26,735 --> 01:11:28,195
Chief lnspector?
770
01:11:28,195 --> 01:11:31,031
I'm leaving for Hong Kong
in the morning.
771
01:11:31,197 --> 01:11:32,783
Hong Kong?
772
01:11:32,867 --> 01:11:36,869
Could you pick me up
some cheap coolie hats?
773
01:11:36,912 --> 01:11:40,624
My dear Auguste,
I need your best Hong Kong disguise.
774
01:11:40,792 --> 01:11:44,794
Also, I will need something
extra special in the godfather line.
775
01:11:45,755 --> 01:11:48,174
Doctor, please, you must help me.
776
01:11:48,215 --> 01:11:50,467
Is Clouseau real...
777
01:11:50,510 --> 01:11:52,470
or am I going mad again?
778
01:11:52,512 --> 01:11:56,057
- What do you think?
- What do I think? What can I think?
779
01:11:56,099 --> 01:11:58,893
If that nincompoop is really alive...
780
01:11:58,935 --> 01:12:03,357
and the things I heard are true,
he'll probably be decorated again...
781
01:12:03,357 --> 01:12:06,234
for rounding up
the biggest drug ring in France...
782
01:12:06,234 --> 01:12:08,820
and I'll be a laughingstock.
783
01:12:08,945 --> 01:12:12,532
That sounds reasonable.
What are you going to do?
784
01:12:13,534 --> 01:12:15,661
What choice do I have?
785
01:12:15,786 --> 01:12:19,372
I either commit myself and come back
to be locked up in here...
786
01:12:21,124 --> 01:12:22,667
or...
787
01:12:23,668 --> 01:12:25,963
I go to Hong Kong.
788
01:12:57,244 --> 01:13:00,874
- I don't think I can do this.
- Of course you can.
789
01:13:00,874 --> 01:13:03,293
Just think yellow and follow me.
790
01:13:35,200 --> 01:13:40,330
"Mr. and Mrs. Low Key."
791
01:13:41,874 --> 01:13:45,211
You stupid lunk! What the hell
do you think you're doing?
792
01:13:45,336 --> 01:13:47,213
Absolutely ruined my suit!
793
01:13:47,338 --> 01:13:49,341
Why the hell don't you look
where you're going?
794
01:13:51,051 --> 01:13:55,054
I'm Mr. Algo. When Mr. Scallini arrives,
have me paged in the bar.
795
01:13:55,221 --> 01:13:57,348
Certainly, Mr. Algo.
796
01:13:58,474 --> 01:14:01,228
Who is gonna pay for my suit?
797
01:14:03,062 --> 01:14:04,940
See that man there?
798
01:14:05,065 --> 01:14:07,650
That's Guy Algo,
Philippe's right-hand man.
799
01:14:07,817 --> 01:14:10,236
This Scallini must be Mr. Big
from New York.
800
01:14:12,114 --> 01:14:14,658
Listen, we'll go up to the room.
801
01:14:14,783 --> 01:14:17,661
You stay here ten minutes,
then tell Mr.--
802
01:14:17,786 --> 01:14:20,830
- Algo.
- Right, yes. Algo.
803
01:14:20,914 --> 01:14:24,084
That Mr. You-Know-Who has arrived,
and bring him to the room.
804
01:14:24,126 --> 01:14:28,255
- Mr. You-Know-Who?
- Right. I will be Mr. You-Know-Who.
805
01:14:28,380 --> 01:14:30,257
Come, Ming Loy.
806
01:15:13,134 --> 01:15:15,720
You got a reservation for Scallini?
807
01:15:21,728 --> 01:15:24,605
Page Mr. Algo in the bar.
Tell him Mr. Scallini is here.
808
01:15:48,797 --> 01:15:52,217
- What do you think you're doing?
- Mr. Scallini in lobby.
809
01:17:27,314 --> 01:17:30,859
You heard what I said to him?
Dumb Frenchman.
810
01:17:30,902 --> 01:17:32,319
"Cochon."
811
01:17:32,444 --> 01:17:34,489
That means pig.
812
01:17:34,571 --> 01:17:37,741
I tell Mr. Scallini you're here.
813
01:17:46,626 --> 01:17:48,503
- Listen, boss--
- It's not boss. It's me!
814
01:17:48,628 --> 01:17:50,046
Where is he?
815
01:17:50,046 --> 01:17:52,048
In the bathroom getting into
his godfather disguise.
816
01:17:52,215 --> 01:17:55,636
Algo's in the next room. Scallini's
down the hall in the Tang suite.
817
01:17:55,636 --> 01:17:58,055
- Marvelous.
- We rode up in the same elevator.
818
01:17:58,055 --> 01:18:00,056
Maybe I can reach him
before he contacts Philippe.
819
01:18:00,056 --> 01:18:04,060
- What are you going to do?
- I'm not sure. Keep your eye on Algo.
820
01:18:29,837 --> 01:18:31,839
- Ice?
- Please.
821
01:18:36,261 --> 01:18:38,555
- Soda?
- Yes.
822
01:18:43,686 --> 01:18:45,938
I hope it's not too strong.
823
01:18:45,979 --> 01:18:48,230
I'm sure it will be fine.
824
01:18:53,278 --> 01:18:55,572
Hey! Mama Mia.
825
01:18:56,574 --> 01:18:58,701
Spaghettini du AI Pacino!
826
01:19:00,452 --> 01:19:05,165
Carlo, Cato and me got a little business
to talk over.
827
01:19:05,165 --> 01:19:07,876
We won't be long.
Have another drink.
828
01:19:09,879 --> 01:19:11,297
Viva Zapata!
829
01:19:15,843 --> 01:19:18,303
- Where is she?
- I don't know.
830
01:19:23,851 --> 01:19:25,269
Get out--
831
01:19:26,854 --> 01:19:28,314
Hello, Mr. Marchione.
832
01:19:28,480 --> 01:19:31,901
- Hey. Come on in.
- Thank you.
833
01:19:31,901 --> 01:19:34,195
- Thank you very much.
- Can I get you a drink?
834
01:19:34,195 --> 01:19:36,197
No, nothing, thank you.
835
01:19:36,907 --> 01:19:38,741
It's Simone.
836
01:19:38,784 --> 01:19:40,868
You have a good memory.
837
01:19:40,910 --> 01:19:43,913
I never forget a pretty face.
838
01:19:43,913 --> 01:19:48,167
Boss, this is Simone.
That's Douvier's personal--
839
01:19:48,209 --> 01:19:50,628
Secretary. How do you do,
Mr. Scallini?
840
01:19:50,753 --> 01:19:54,341
We never met before.
If we meet before, you call me Julio.
841
01:19:55,509 --> 01:19:59,055
- That's a nice hand.
- Thank you. That's only the right one.
842
01:19:59,180 --> 01:20:01,474
- You type, too.
- 100 words a minute.
843
01:20:01,515 --> 01:20:03,474
I may faint.
844
01:20:03,517 --> 01:20:07,229
Mr. Douvier has asked me to apologize.
He's going to be a little late.
845
01:20:07,229 --> 01:20:09,773
If you like, I'd be happy
to keep you company until he arrives.
846
01:20:09,816 --> 01:20:12,527
If I like?
Does my mother cook spaghetti?
847
01:20:12,527 --> 01:20:14,904
To the Gannet Transaction.
848
01:20:22,245 --> 01:20:24,914
Shall I tell Douvier
we're on our way?
849
01:20:27,125 --> 01:20:29,126
Don't forget the money.
850
01:20:39,679 --> 01:20:41,264
What?
851
01:20:41,264 --> 01:20:43,933
Throat! Back!
852
01:20:45,227 --> 01:20:46,978
Choking!
853
01:20:47,145 --> 01:20:50,106
You want me to hit you on the back.
854
01:21:12,297 --> 01:21:14,298
We're on our way.
855
01:21:15,174 --> 01:21:18,302
- Mr. Douvier will meet us in the lobby.
- Yeah. Great.
856
01:21:18,469 --> 01:21:21,138
- Is that it?
- Yeah.
857
01:21:21,180 --> 01:21:23,182
50 million francs and no bodyguard?
858
01:21:23,307 --> 01:21:26,852
Listen, buddy, I take care of my body,
my body takes care of me.
859
01:21:26,894 --> 01:21:28,854
You know what I'm driving at?
860
01:21:37,781 --> 01:21:39,740
I'll buy some cigarettes, huh?
861
01:21:39,784 --> 01:21:43,161
Yeah, smoke a few. When Douvier shows,
I'll meet you in the lobby.
862
01:21:43,203 --> 01:21:44,621
Right.
863
01:22:40,554 --> 01:22:42,680
Be right with you.
864
01:23:16,132 --> 01:23:18,718
What the hell is going on here?
865
01:23:36,028 --> 01:23:37,904
Lee Kee shipyards.
866
01:23:44,787 --> 01:23:48,624
- Where'd he go?
- I think to Lee Kee shipyards.
867
01:24:09,645 --> 01:24:10,895
My cart!
868
01:24:11,815 --> 01:24:14,942
You see this? I can tell by
your heart line you're a passionate man.
869
01:24:14,942 --> 01:24:16,945
See how long this is?
870
01:24:16,945 --> 01:24:20,240
Keep watching.
It's going to get longer.
871
01:24:23,534 --> 01:24:26,246
- Hello.
- Lee Kee shipyards. Douvier.
872
01:24:26,246 --> 01:24:28,790
It was Douvier!
873
01:24:28,832 --> 01:24:33,378
The doorman heard him tell the driver
to go to the Lee Kee shipyard.
874
01:24:33,378 --> 01:24:36,382
Something is caccuzza around here.
875
01:24:38,382 --> 01:24:41,678
Your boss and a couple boys
just left the hotel.
876
01:24:41,678 --> 01:24:43,973
Really? I wonder why they did that?
877
01:24:44,140 --> 01:24:46,851
You got me.
Why don't we go ask him?
878
01:24:46,976 --> 01:24:50,854
Yes. Okay, I understand.
879
01:24:53,399 --> 01:24:55,984
Douvier left the hotel
about five minutes ago.
880
01:24:55,984 --> 01:25:00,406
He was with two men. He told the driver
to go to the Lee Kee shipyard.
881
01:25:00,406 --> 01:25:02,408
I'm sure it was that nincompoop.
882
01:25:07,830 --> 01:25:10,249
I'm sure Mr. Douvier didn't intend
to be gone very long.
883
01:25:10,291 --> 01:25:13,002
- We'll see.
- It doesn't make much sense.
884
01:25:13,002 --> 01:25:15,171
If you leave,
and then he comes back--
885
01:25:15,254 --> 01:25:18,132
Stop worrying.
You give yourself wrinkles.
886
01:25:24,889 --> 01:25:27,892
What about this Lee Kee shipyard?
887
01:25:27,892 --> 01:25:30,020
Perfectly legitimate
as far as I know.
888
01:25:30,145 --> 01:25:33,148
They build a line of
expensive power cruisers and sailboats.
889
01:25:33,190 --> 01:25:35,901
Maybe Mr. Douvier
is just buying himself a yacht.
890
01:25:43,909 --> 01:25:45,577
Lee Kee shipyards?
891
01:25:45,619 --> 01:25:47,579
Yeah, that's what
the como si chiamare said.
892
01:26:06,224 --> 01:26:07,934
Move it!
893
01:26:13,188 --> 01:26:15,066
Come along!
894
01:28:02,635 --> 01:28:05,054
This is Mr. Chow,
our Far Eastern representative.
895
01:28:05,054 --> 01:28:07,933
- Mr. Scallini.
- It's an honor to meet you.
896
01:28:07,933 --> 01:28:11,478
- You remember Mr. Algo. Shall we go?
- This way, please.
897
01:28:11,519 --> 01:28:13,938
After you launch the boat,
we'll go to Mr. Chow's office.
898
01:28:14,063 --> 01:28:16,357
You can sign the ownership papers.
Everything legal and aboveboard.
899
01:28:16,525 --> 01:28:18,652
Above the board. Good, good.
900
01:28:20,069 --> 01:28:23,907
- Where is it? You know--
- I understood you were told.
901
01:28:23,949 --> 01:28:27,827
No. I was told.
But I'm checking, you know.
902
01:28:29,370 --> 01:28:34,209
- In the keel.
- The old keel ploy. Yes.
903
01:28:34,251 --> 01:28:37,129
All you have to do is sail her
around the Caribbean for a while...
904
01:28:37,254 --> 01:28:40,674
haul her out of the water,
take the midsection out of the keel...
905
01:28:40,800 --> 01:28:43,969
and voila, 40 kilos
of the finest merchandise...
906
01:28:43,969 --> 01:28:46,388
your experts have ever tested.
907
01:28:46,555 --> 01:28:50,100
I'll tell you, it better hell be
the best merchandise...
908
01:28:50,142 --> 01:28:53,563
'cause my experts
certainly have tested some.
909
01:28:53,688 --> 01:28:56,399
- We have faith in our merchandise.
- That's good.
910
01:28:56,524 --> 01:28:59,277
All right. Now, would you like
to launch her?
911
01:28:59,277 --> 01:29:01,404
I would be delighted.
912
01:29:19,589 --> 01:29:23,426
September. A good month for the vintage.
913
01:29:27,306 --> 01:29:28,724
Congratulations!
914
01:29:44,449 --> 01:29:46,909
He must be a cop!
Get him! Get him!
915
01:29:48,035 --> 01:29:49,495
Hey, boss!
916
01:29:59,213 --> 01:30:01,633
Look out, you are an idiot!
917
01:30:05,220 --> 01:30:06,930
What are you doing?
918
01:31:09,870 --> 01:31:11,288
Jesus Christ!
919
01:31:16,293 --> 01:31:18,004
You crumb!
920
01:31:25,552 --> 01:31:28,597
Get back here, you slob!
921
01:31:31,891 --> 01:31:33,310
It's me!
922
01:31:33,310 --> 01:31:34,728
I know!
923
01:31:48,034 --> 01:31:49,285
Wait!
924
01:32:12,601 --> 01:32:15,938
Hey, cancel the artillery!
925
01:32:22,653 --> 01:32:26,073
I don't care! Get out of my way!
926
01:32:26,073 --> 01:32:29,660
- Al, where are you?
- How do I know?
927
01:32:30,911 --> 01:32:34,664
Wherever you are,
this is Chief lnspector Clouseau.
928
01:32:34,831 --> 01:32:37,543
I'm warning you
that if you are not careful...
929
01:32:37,543 --> 01:32:39,837
I will arrest you all
in the name of the law.
930
01:32:46,386 --> 01:32:50,391
You and your bright ideas.
Let me get my hands on you.
931
01:32:50,391 --> 01:32:51,849
Clouseau?
932
01:32:52,809 --> 01:32:54,935
Yes?
933
01:32:54,977 --> 01:32:57,856
- Are you wounded?
- No.
934
01:32:57,939 --> 01:33:01,276
Fortunately I was saved
by the darkness.
935
01:33:01,276 --> 01:33:03,696
So what we need is more light.
936
01:33:09,993 --> 01:33:12,162
Look what you did to my shoes!
937
01:33:46,031 --> 01:33:47,490
Hello, Philippe.
938
01:33:48,617 --> 01:33:51,036
Simone, what the hell
are you doing here?
939
01:33:51,161 --> 01:33:53,204
I'm waiting for the firecrackers
to go off.
940
01:33:53,288 --> 01:33:56,749
- What firecrackers?
- The ones I stuck in your pants.
941
01:36:27,071 --> 01:36:30,533
Hello.
I'm sorry I'm late.
942
01:36:30,616 --> 01:36:35,372
I had some important police business
to attend to, you know.
943
01:36:35,372 --> 01:36:38,083
- Everything's all right?
- Yes, absolutely fine.
944
01:36:38,208 --> 01:36:40,377
Allow me to let you in the car.
945
01:36:40,543 --> 01:36:42,378
Please.
946
01:36:42,546 --> 01:36:45,257
- It's beautiful.
- It's rather neat, isn't it?
947
01:36:45,257 --> 01:36:47,259
I call it the Silver Hornet.
948
01:36:56,684 --> 01:36:58,145
Yes.
949
01:37:00,230 --> 01:37:03,525
It's a little overdue for service,
unfortunately.
950
01:37:07,864 --> 01:37:10,700
Perhaps it's better
to leave that there.
951
01:37:11,867 --> 01:37:13,953
It's a beautiful night.
Why don't we walk?
952
01:37:13,994 --> 01:37:15,996
What an excellent idea.
953
01:37:16,830 --> 01:37:19,833
- I'm sorry about that.
- It's quite all right.
954
01:37:19,875 --> 01:37:22,002
You look ravishing tonight.
955
01:37:22,127 --> 01:37:24,714
- Yes, I know that.
- You know that?
956
01:37:24,838 --> 01:37:26,841
I knew that you knew that.
957
01:37:26,882 --> 01:37:28,885
You did? I knew you knew
I knew that.
958
01:37:29,009 --> 01:37:31,304
What made you decide
to become a detective?
959
01:37:31,304 --> 01:37:35,892
It's not something one decides
every day of the week, you know.
960
01:37:35,892 --> 01:37:39,478
But in my case, it began
when my great aunt was kidnapped...
961
01:37:39,604 --> 01:37:44,317
and held for ransom
by an unlicensed Armenian phrenologist.
962
01:37:44,442 --> 01:37:46,486
An Armenian phrenologist?
963
01:37:46,569 --> 01:37:51,033
Yes, you know. A man who reads
the "bimps" on the head.
964
01:37:51,033 --> 01:37:53,619
- The "bimps"?
- What?
73475
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