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1
00:00:07,507 --> 00:00:10,635
I'm a weirdo.
That's what everyone says.
2
00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:13,179
Sometimes, I don't know what people mean
when they say things,
3
00:00:13,346 --> 00:00:17,267
and that can make me feel alone even
when there are other people in the room.
4
00:00:17,350 --> 00:00:19,936
And all I can do is sit and twiddle,
5
00:00:20,020 --> 00:00:22,689
which is what I call
my selfstimulatory behavior,
6
00:00:22,772 --> 00:00:27,360
when I flick a pencil against
a rubber band at a certain frequency
7
00:00:27,444 --> 00:00:29,529
and think about all the things that
I could never do,
8
00:00:29,612 --> 00:00:34,075
like research penguins in Antarctica
or have a girlfriend.
9
00:00:34,159 --> 00:00:36,995
I don't know.
I'd like to go to Antarctica.
10
00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:38,872
It's quiet there...
11
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:42,208
except in the rookeries,
where the penguins breed.
12
00:00:42,292 --> 00:00:44,294
Those aren't quiet. No, sir.
13
00:00:45,628 --> 00:00:47,088
I'm finished with my answer.
14
00:00:48,131 --> 00:00:49,215
Great.
15
00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:51,718
Almost done for today.
Good session, Sam.
16
00:00:51,801 --> 00:00:53,970
I can see your bra. It's purple.
17
00:00:57,223 --> 00:01:01,061
Um, there was one more thing
I wanted to discuss.
18
00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:03,813
And I don't need your answer now,
19
00:01:03,897 --> 00:01:06,232
but I'm asking all my clients
if they'd be willing
20
00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:07,984
to donate their brains for research.
21
00:01:09,694 --> 00:01:10,945
Donate my brain?
22
00:01:11,696 --> 00:01:13,865
After you die.
Oh.
23
00:01:13,948 --> 00:01:17,160
Yeah. There's such a shortage
of brain matter available,
24
00:01:17,243 --> 00:01:19,829
and, you know, there's no
substitute for the real thing.
25
00:01:21,081 --> 00:01:23,249
Just think about it.
26
00:01:24,292 --> 00:01:26,586
Okay.
And, hey, Sam,
27
00:01:27,253 --> 00:01:29,923
what you said earlier
about having a girlfriend?
28
00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,383
People in the spectrum date, you know?
29
00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:36,137
You can try to find someone,
if you wanted to.
30
00:01:36,679 --> 00:01:39,182
How?
You just have to put yourself out there.
31
00:01:40,141 --> 00:01:41,184
Out where?
32
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:45,021
Buses are okay,
33
00:01:45,104 --> 00:01:48,024
but I don't like the feeling
of the seat on my back,
34
00:01:48,108 --> 00:01:49,859
so I sit like this.
35
00:01:49,943 --> 00:01:51,653
I don't know how people stand it.
36
00:01:51,736 --> 00:01:55,281
Maybe they've developed thicker back
skin from riding the bus so much.
37
00:01:55,365 --> 00:01:58,660
There's a type of Antarctic cod
that has a special protein
38
00:01:58,743 --> 00:02:01,037
in its blood that
stops it from freezing.
39
00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:03,206
Antifreeze in fish.
40
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:10,547
I was just thinking about Antarctic cod.
41
00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:16,970
Antarctica is the most remote continent
on the planet.
42
00:02:19,430 --> 00:02:21,391
It has 90% of the world's ice,
43
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:24,185
but it's considered a desert
because the annual rainfall
44
00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:25,687
is only about eight inches.
45
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:29,232
You wouldn't think it was
a desert when you looked at it.
46
00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:31,943
That's why I like it.
47
00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:34,863
It's not what it looks like.
48
00:02:35,488 --> 00:02:38,158
Sam! Dinner!
49
00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:41,578
So, I ordered those Tshirts
that Sam likes, in bulk...
50
00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:43,454
you know, 100% cotton...
51
00:02:43,538 --> 00:02:48,001
and they switched them to something
that they called "triblend."
52
00:02:48,084 --> 00:02:52,422
So I called the company,
and I spoke to this woman named Rizwana.
53
00:02:52,505 --> 00:02:54,424
I think I was speaking with India.
54
00:02:54,507 --> 00:02:55,592
Mmhmm.
55
00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:57,260
But, anyway, um...
56
00:02:57,343 --> 00:03:01,055
And she found a box of the old ones,
57
00:03:01,139 --> 00:03:02,724
and they sent them free of charge.
58
00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:05,101
They're exactly the right kind.
Mm.
59
00:03:05,184 --> 00:03:07,061
Wow. That is a great story, Mom.
60
00:03:07,145 --> 00:03:08,438
Oh, don't be a dick, honey.
61
00:03:08,521 --> 00:03:11,149
So, Sam,
how was your session with Julia today?
62
00:03:11,232 --> 00:03:12,775
She wants me to donate my brain,
63
00:03:12,859 --> 00:03:14,444
but don't worry, it's after I die.
64
00:03:14,527 --> 00:03:17,447
What, like, for research?
That could be kind of cool.
65
00:03:17,530 --> 00:03:18,531
Absolutely not.
66
00:03:19,198 --> 00:03:20,825
And the queen has spoken.
67
00:03:20,909 --> 00:03:23,077
Well, it's gross, Casey.
68
00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:26,039
You tell Julia, "Thank you, but no."
69
00:03:26,122 --> 00:03:28,333
Okay.
You're so easy to boss around.
70
00:03:28,416 --> 00:03:30,585
I don't care what happens
to my dead brain.
71
00:03:30,668 --> 00:03:33,171
It's either I give it to Julia,
or maggots eat it.
72
00:03:33,254 --> 00:03:35,089
If Mom wants maggots to eat it, fine.
73
00:03:35,173 --> 00:03:37,467
No, no, no. That's not what I'm saying.
74
00:03:37,550 --> 00:03:38,551
Kind of is.
75
00:03:38,635 --> 00:03:40,220
I don't care. I'll be dead.
76
00:03:40,303 --> 00:03:43,431
Can we stop talking about you being
dead? You're not going anywhere.
77
00:03:43,514 --> 00:03:45,141
Wow, this chicken's really good, honey.
78
00:03:45,266 --> 00:03:46,851
Thanks. It's a dry rub.
79
00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:48,144
It's a good dry rub.
80
00:03:48,811 --> 00:03:51,272
Julia thinks that I should
put myself out there
81
00:03:51,356 --> 00:03:53,316
and find someone to have sex with.
82
00:03:54,859 --> 00:03:56,778
She didn't say the sex part.
I added that.
83
00:04:33,773 --> 00:04:36,359
My school is crowded, noisy,
84
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:37,986
and it smells weird,
85
00:04:38,069 --> 00:04:40,405
but it has one thing going for it:
86
00:04:40,488 --> 00:04:42,490
it has lots of girls.
87
00:04:42,573 --> 00:04:47,287
Well, I think every girl is pretty
in her own way,
88
00:04:47,370 --> 00:04:50,164
like a snowflake
in a seasonal Antarctic storm.
89
00:05:06,014 --> 00:05:07,807
But girls don't notice me at all.
90
00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:14,689
Thank you.
91
00:05:17,775 --> 00:05:19,944
Banged a veterinarian
I met online last night.
92
00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:22,613
She had a pet parrot that
repeated everything she said.
93
00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:25,908
"Do me, Brown Sugar!
Do me, Brown Sugar!"
94
00:05:26,409 --> 00:05:28,244
Oh, shit. I think she's racist.
95
00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:30,455
What kind of parrot?
96
00:05:30,538 --> 00:05:33,124
Oh, I don't know. The red rainbow one?
97
00:05:33,207 --> 00:05:35,543
That's a scarlet macaw.
Oh.
98
00:05:41,507 --> 00:05:42,550
Zahid...
99
00:05:43,676 --> 00:05:44,886
do you like dating girls?
100
00:05:46,304 --> 00:05:48,264
Yeah, dude. I like dating girls.
101
00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:55,605
What are you doing?
102
00:05:55,688 --> 00:05:58,191
Going online to try
and find a girl to date.
103
00:05:58,274 --> 00:05:59,734
That's hilarious. I'll help.
104
00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:02,987
Okay, finish this sentence:
105
00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:05,323
"I spend a lot of time
thinking about..."
106
00:06:05,406 --> 00:06:06,657
Easy. Penguins.
107
00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:09,535
And, especially,
I'll say chinstrap penguins.
108
00:06:09,619 --> 00:06:11,579
They're my favorite bird,
109
00:06:11,662 --> 00:06:14,123
but all four types
of Antarctic penguins are good.
110
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:18,252
Did you know early explorers thought they
were fish and classified them that way?
111
00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:20,088
Not birds, fish.
112
00:06:22,590 --> 00:06:23,841
I'm gonna put "sports."
113
00:06:23,925 --> 00:06:25,134
Hey, kids.
114
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:26,469
What you doing?
115
00:06:26,552 --> 00:06:28,679
Casey's helping me sign up
for online dating,
116
00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:30,681
but hates all my answers,
so she's lying.
117
00:06:32,642 --> 00:06:34,477
Wow.
Mmhmm.
118
00:06:34,560 --> 00:06:36,145
You're a little young for that.
119
00:06:36,229 --> 00:06:38,940
You know, I saw an episode on 20/20.
120
00:06:39,023 --> 00:06:42,276
There's actually something
called "catfishing,"
121
00:06:42,527 --> 00:06:45,571
and it has nothing to do with fishing.
Bye, Mom.
122
00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:50,660
Should we take another picture
with Edison?
123
00:06:50,743 --> 00:06:53,621
I read online that girls love animals.
124
00:06:53,704 --> 00:06:54,831
Maybe like this?
125
00:06:55,790 --> 00:06:58,459
I think this might go quicker
if you just leave.
126
00:07:00,294 --> 00:07:01,838
Damn it.
127
00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,174
Careful. What are you doing?
128
00:07:05,258 --> 00:07:06,717
Honey, can you get that for me?
129
00:07:08,678 --> 00:07:10,763
Which one?
Three to five.
130
00:07:11,764 --> 00:07:13,975
This room, it's, like, so disorganized.
131
00:07:14,934 --> 00:07:16,477
Such a mess.
You okay?
132
00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:18,312
Yes, fine. Totally fine.
133
00:07:19,313 --> 00:07:20,231
Yeah.
134
00:07:21,149 --> 00:07:23,818
Sam's gonna start dating,
so that's something.
135
00:07:23,901 --> 00:07:25,194
Do you remember these?
136
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:26,988
Sam's emotion cards?
Yeah.
137
00:07:27,071 --> 00:07:29,323
"Someone's making this face,
they might be sad,
138
00:07:29,407 --> 00:07:31,033
so you should try to be kind to them."
139
00:07:31,117 --> 00:07:33,911
A woman in the support group,
her son was just diagnosed,
140
00:07:33,995 --> 00:07:34,912
so I said I'd throw
141
00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:36,706
some things together.
142
00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:39,959
This was the exact face he made
when I surprised him with Mets tickets.
143
00:07:40,042 --> 00:07:41,919
Remember that?
Yeah, I do.
144
00:07:42,003 --> 00:07:45,173
I wanted us to just have one thing
in common.
145
00:07:45,256 --> 00:07:46,466
Just one thing.
146
00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:50,470
Me and my dad used to go
to the ball games all the time.
147
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:54,474
I think it's all right that
Sam's gonna try to date.
148
00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:57,018
I mean, you and I weren't
much older when we met,
149
00:07:57,101 --> 00:07:58,978
and that was fun, right?
We had a good time.
150
00:07:59,061 --> 00:08:02,023
Sam's not like us.
I know, but he has to start...
151
00:08:02,106 --> 00:08:04,108
Do you know that every time
the phone rings, I jump?
152
00:08:04,692 --> 00:08:06,152
Every time.
153
00:08:06,944 --> 00:08:09,655
I think he's crossed the street again
with his eyes closed...
154
00:08:10,531 --> 00:08:12,533
or he had a freakout in a store
155
00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:15,870
or he's hit a police officer.
156
00:08:15,953 --> 00:08:18,247
Every time the phone rings.
I know. I know.
157
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:21,083
But maybe now it's time for us
to take a step back.
158
00:08:21,709 --> 00:08:23,628
Spend time together, just the two of us,
159
00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:26,547
you know, get back to where
we were before all of this.
160
00:08:27,173 --> 00:08:28,049
Maybe we go on a date.
161
00:08:29,008 --> 00:08:29,842
Hmm?
162
00:08:29,926 --> 00:08:31,719
Or we... we fool around.
163
00:08:33,429 --> 00:08:34,764
Huh?
Yeah, right.
164
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:35,890
No?
165
00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:39,602
Oh.
166
00:08:40,478 --> 00:08:41,479
You're serious.
167
00:08:42,355 --> 00:08:43,689
I'm not serious.
168
00:08:43,773 --> 00:08:45,441
I'm sorry.
I'm just playing.
169
00:08:54,700 --> 00:08:57,745
Common traits
of autism spectrum disorder include
170
00:08:57,828 --> 00:09:00,248
repetitive behaviors,
difficulty socializing
171
00:09:00,331 --> 00:09:03,209
and persistent, intense preoccupations.
172
00:09:03,292 --> 00:09:06,963
I have a patient who came up
with 95 ways to cook an egg.
173
00:09:10,424 --> 00:09:11,676
Come on in.
174
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,346
Please, sit.
175
00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:17,974
Yeah, thanks.
Oh.
176
00:09:19,809 --> 00:09:21,894
Is everything okay with Sam?
177
00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,397
Oh, yes. It's fine.
178
00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:25,773
I just, um...
179
00:09:29,193 --> 00:09:31,529
Sam said you spoke to him about dating.
180
00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,824
He mentioned wanting a girlfriend,
so I thought...
181
00:09:34,907 --> 00:09:36,701
I appreciate you're trying to help,
182
00:09:36,784 --> 00:09:40,621
but all the things that make
my son's everyday life difficult...
183
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:44,208
like reading social cues,
exchanging small talk...
184
00:09:44,292 --> 00:09:46,961
all the things I've helped him
navigate his entire life,
185
00:09:47,044 --> 00:09:48,421
are magnified in dating.
186
00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:50,256
Um...
187
00:09:50,965 --> 00:09:55,011
Dating is almost entirely
nonverbal communication,
188
00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:57,179
and Sam's the most literal
person I know.
189
00:09:57,847 --> 00:10:00,516
Yeah, and there are strategies
that I could teach him.
190
00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:01,601
Are there?
191
00:10:03,102 --> 00:10:05,771
Are there strategies
for when you get your heart broken?
192
00:10:07,773 --> 00:10:09,567
Sam is doing really well.
193
00:10:10,151 --> 00:10:12,153
I mean,
we're 32 days into his senior year,
194
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:14,488
and he hasn't had a meltdown yet, so...
195
00:10:15,489 --> 00:10:16,741
I don't want to push him.
196
00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:20,119
I mean, relationships are hard enough
for neurotypicals.
197
00:10:20,202 --> 00:10:22,622
I don't want to put that kind
of pressure on my son.
198
00:10:23,289 --> 00:10:26,667
There was a study done
in Toronto a few years ago.
199
00:10:27,376 --> 00:10:30,630
Researchers found that only nine percent
200
00:10:30,713 --> 00:10:32,548
of adults with autism are married,
201
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,508
not because they lack the desire,
202
00:10:34,592 --> 00:10:36,677
but because they don't
know how to do it.
203
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:40,014
Your son has the same desire
to be loved that we all do.
204
00:10:40,640 --> 00:10:41,891
Why shouldn't he pursue it?
205
00:10:43,392 --> 00:10:45,019
He's not ready yet.
206
00:10:45,686 --> 00:10:48,022
You know,
a lot of parents have a hard time
207
00:10:48,105 --> 00:10:49,899
as their kids become more independent.
208
00:10:49,982 --> 00:10:52,693
It's completely natural.
209
00:10:52,777 --> 00:10:54,945
So if you ever need someone to talk to,
210
00:10:55,029 --> 00:10:57,156
I can refer you to one of my colleagues.
211
00:10:57,239 --> 00:10:58,783
Oh, wow. No, um...
212
00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:02,870
That won't be necessary.
213
00:11:04,580 --> 00:11:05,706
Thank you for your time.
214
00:11:08,250 --> 00:11:10,461
That's okay. I got it. Thanks so much.
215
00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:11,796
Have a great day.
Okay.
216
00:11:18,094 --> 00:11:20,096
When I'm learning something new,
217
00:11:20,179 --> 00:11:24,058
like how to get infinity lives
in a video game or date girls,
218
00:11:24,141 --> 00:11:25,559
I do a lot of research.
219
00:11:25,643 --> 00:11:26,560
I like research.
220
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,020
Insult them.
221
00:11:28,104 --> 00:11:31,565
Something like, "Baby,
those some serious bug eyes you got."
222
00:11:32,566 --> 00:11:34,360
Trust me, brother...
Bug eyes?
223
00:11:34,443 --> 00:11:36,404
quickest way to get a chick
on your dick.
224
00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:40,241
I examine as many sources
as possible.
225
00:11:40,324 --> 00:11:42,243
Yo, yo, mamacita.
226
00:11:42,952 --> 00:11:44,537
Is that a phone in your back pocket?
227
00:11:45,329 --> 00:11:46,872
'Cause that ass is calling to me.
228
00:11:48,833 --> 00:11:50,376
And I ask questions.
229
00:11:50,459 --> 00:11:52,420
Just listen to what they say.
230
00:11:52,503 --> 00:11:54,839
Don't bring up seals
or penguins or whatever.
231
00:11:54,922 --> 00:11:56,674
And don't stare at their boobs.
232
00:11:56,757 --> 00:11:57,883
Wait, slow down.
233
00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:01,178
I'm still on the no penguins part.
What if she likes penguins?
234
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,055
Just assume she doesn't.
235
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:07,518
The trick is knowing when
to put my research to use.
236
00:12:07,601 --> 00:12:09,186
I'm not great at picking up signals.
237
00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:13,482
Yo, Sammy.
Red over there is making eyes.
238
00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,818
What?
That chick.
239
00:12:15,901 --> 00:12:17,737
Bubble Butt by the monitors.
240
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:20,698
What about her?
241
00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:22,575
Dude, she's smiling right at you.
242
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:25,119
Oh.
243
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:26,579
So?
244
00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,248
Smile back.
Really?
245
00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:39,717
Wow.
246
00:12:39,800 --> 00:12:41,677
You scared her away
from across the store.
247
00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:43,804
Impressive range, dude.
248
00:13:02,114 --> 00:13:03,073
Oh, no.
249
00:13:03,157 --> 00:13:06,285
I'm sure whoever did this
just feels terrible.
250
00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:09,830
Bailey.
251
00:13:19,798 --> 00:13:22,218
I don't get it.
You're not even friends with Beth.
252
00:13:22,301 --> 00:13:24,303
So? You don't have to be friends
to do what's right.
253
00:13:24,595 --> 00:13:27,765
Sweetie,
hitting someone's face is never right.
254
00:13:27,848 --> 00:13:30,935
Of course you don't get it. You were
the one picking on the fat kids.
255
00:13:31,018 --> 00:13:32,353
I had a pudgy friend.
256
00:13:32,436 --> 00:13:36,398
Besides, Bailey Bennet is a lovely girl,
and she did not deserve to get punched.
257
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,733
Bailey Bennet is a twat.
258
00:13:37,816 --> 00:13:39,235
Casey Gardener, language.
259
00:13:39,318 --> 00:13:41,612
Sometimes a word or phrase
gets stuck in my head,
260
00:13:41,695 --> 00:13:45,282
like on on a loop,
and it just plays over and over
261
00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:46,575
and over and over.
262
00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:48,619
Twat. Twat.
263
00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,622
Twat, twat, twat,
twat, twat, twat, twat...
264
00:13:51,705 --> 00:13:54,542
You got suspended?
You didn't waste any time.
265
00:13:54,625 --> 00:13:57,253
You're gonna miss practice.
They said I could practice.
266
00:13:57,336 --> 00:13:58,629
Twat, twat.
That's good.
267
00:13:58,712 --> 00:14:02,466
At least she's not gonna miss practice.
She punched a pretty girl in the face!
268
00:14:02,550 --> 00:14:04,260
Why does it matter she's pretty?
269
00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:06,428
Twat. Twat.
270
00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:07,805
Twat.
271
00:14:07,888 --> 00:14:10,975
Twat, twat, twat,
twat, twat, twat, twat.
272
00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:12,393
You're grounded.
273
00:14:12,476 --> 00:14:14,812
All right. That seems fair.
I'm gonna go for a run.
274
00:14:14,895 --> 00:14:16,605
Can I run when I'm grounded, warden?
275
00:14:17,273 --> 00:14:18,899
I'm done. You deal with her.
276
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:20,776
Go ahead.
277
00:14:22,027 --> 00:14:24,446
Awesome.
Great. Now I'm the bad guy again.
278
00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:27,408
Casey and I are cool. You're always
gonna be the bad guy with her.
279
00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:34,540
Leopards laze each
280
00:14:35,291 --> 00:14:37,293
On plush pillows
281
00:14:37,376 --> 00:14:41,297
Paperback dreams
In their deep doze
282
00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:58,689
Hey, Casey!
I brought you a chocolate cake.
283
00:14:58,772 --> 00:15:00,441
I make amazing cakes.
284
00:15:00,524 --> 00:15:02,318
I won three bakeoffs at my church.
285
00:15:03,193 --> 00:15:05,696
This is my brother Evan.
He drove me here.
286
00:15:05,779 --> 00:15:07,406
Hey.
Hey.
287
00:15:07,489 --> 00:15:10,242
Okay. Thanks for the cake.
288
00:15:10,326 --> 00:15:12,161
Thank you for today.
289
00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,163
Twat!
Sam!
290
00:15:14,246 --> 00:15:15,831
Jesus!
Um, hello.
291
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,207
What is wrong with him?
292
00:15:17,291 --> 00:15:19,376
Nothing's wrong with him.
Get away from him.
293
00:15:21,253 --> 00:15:23,547
It's cool. I got it.
294
00:15:24,465 --> 00:15:25,549
All right, bye.
295
00:15:27,509 --> 00:15:29,720
You forgot your chocolate cake!
296
00:15:29,803 --> 00:15:31,388
I'll just leave it on the porch.
297
00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:33,641
You're such an asshole.
298
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:37,061
My sister doesn't let
anyone beat me up...
299
00:15:41,982 --> 00:15:43,609
Got to do it four times, right?
300
00:15:43,692 --> 00:15:44,693
Ow!
301
00:15:44,818 --> 00:15:46,487
except herself.
302
00:15:49,573 --> 00:15:51,116
So, how's your week?
303
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:52,701
Well, I still don't have a date.
304
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:54,662
I scared a girl off
from across the room,
305
00:15:54,745 --> 00:15:56,830
and we had meat loaf twice,
and I hate meat loaf.
306
00:15:56,914 --> 00:15:57,790
How?
307
00:15:57,873 --> 00:15:59,541
My mom just made it in the oven.
308
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:02,086
I mean,
how did you scare her away?
309
00:16:02,169 --> 00:16:05,422
I don't know. I've been wondering
and wondering and wondering.
310
00:16:05,506 --> 00:16:08,050
Okay. Pretend I'm her. What'd you do?
311
00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:11,387
I just smiled at her like this.
312
00:16:12,638 --> 00:16:13,555
Ah.
313
00:16:14,223 --> 00:16:15,599
I read about it online.
314
00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:20,688
"Making eye contact and smiling
are step one for flirting."
315
00:16:20,771 --> 00:16:21,939
That's what I did. Look.
316
00:16:24,817 --> 00:16:26,735
"Insults equal chick on dick."
317
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,696
Not that part. The eye contact part.
318
00:16:28,779 --> 00:16:31,782
Right,
but we should get to that at some point.
319
00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:34,535
Anyways, the problem is
320
00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:38,497
you're crossing the line
from flirty to creepy.
321
00:16:38,580 --> 00:16:41,125
When you make eye contact,
you have to look away a bit.
322
00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:45,004
But how can I make eye contact
and look away?
323
00:16:45,087 --> 00:16:47,297
I mean, I'm not a mantis shrimp.
324
00:16:47,381 --> 00:16:48,590
All right.
325
00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:51,969
Okay, you make eye contact...
326
00:16:52,803 --> 00:16:53,929
glance away...
327
00:16:54,596 --> 00:16:56,223
make eye contact again.
328
00:16:57,391 --> 00:16:58,809
Otherwise, it can seem scary.
329
00:16:58,892 --> 00:17:01,687
Hold on. Let me write this down.
Okay.
330
00:17:03,105 --> 00:17:04,773
Now, the smile.
331
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:09,194
You need to turn that down, like, 70%.
332
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:11,947
70% smaller?
At least.
333
00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:16,326
Try no teeth?
334
00:17:18,495 --> 00:17:20,998
Yeah! That's the one. That's perfect.
335
00:17:24,460 --> 00:17:26,795
They didn't taste purple,
but they were purple carrots.
336
00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,548
It's a new kind of carrot, right?
337
00:17:29,631 --> 00:17:31,759
It tasted weird, but it was good.
338
00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:35,721
Okay, don't look,
but there's a couple on my right
339
00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:39,266
that's on possibly
the worst first date ever.
340
00:17:39,349 --> 00:17:41,143
I said don't look!
These two?
341
00:17:41,810 --> 00:17:44,646
She just asked him
if he wanted children.
342
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:48,442
They haven't even ordered appetizers.
God. There's no coming back from that.
343
00:17:48,525 --> 00:17:50,778
We should tell them what they're in for.
No.
344
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:57,159
You know, there is a small chance
that you're right.
345
00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:58,202
Yeah?
346
00:17:58,285 --> 00:18:00,579
A night out was a good idea.
Just a small chance?
347
00:18:00,662 --> 00:18:01,747
Yeah.
348
00:18:02,498 --> 00:18:03,749
I'm even wearing...
349
00:18:04,416 --> 00:18:06,585
a thong.
You are?
350
00:18:06,668 --> 00:18:07,503
Me, too.
351
00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:13,467
How's yours? Mine's really uncomfortable.
I feel good. Holds everything in place.
352
00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:16,929
See, this is nice.
353
00:18:17,012 --> 00:18:18,097
Mm.
354
00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:20,182
We needed this.
Mmhmm.
355
00:18:22,559 --> 00:18:23,602
We did.
356
00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:28,273
It's just hard for me
to relax sometimes.
357
00:18:29,274 --> 00:18:32,736
I get so worried about the kids and...
I know. But everything's good.
358
00:18:32,820 --> 00:18:34,655
The kids are great. Everything's fine.
359
00:18:35,989 --> 00:18:38,700
The kids are great?
Oh, come on. Here we go.
360
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:42,830
No, I just want to hear
why you think the kids are so great.
361
00:18:42,913 --> 00:18:44,790
Why are you getting upset?
I'm not.
362
00:18:44,873 --> 00:18:46,834
You're implying that
I worry over nothing.
363
00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:49,378
Well... I mean, sometimes, you do.
364
00:18:50,671 --> 00:18:53,841
I mean, who cares? Sam wants to date.
That's good. That's a good thing.
365
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:55,884
He's 18.
It'd be weird if he didn't want to date.
366
00:18:55,968 --> 00:18:59,012
Because, Doug, it's not just dating.
367
00:18:59,096 --> 00:19:01,306
First it's dating,
and then he's graduating,
368
00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:03,433
and then he's moving out into the world.
369
00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:05,561
We can't protect him,
and that's terrifying.
370
00:19:05,644 --> 00:19:07,020
That's what we want for him.
371
00:19:07,104 --> 00:19:08,313
There's a lot we want
372
00:19:08,397 --> 00:19:10,524
that aren't possible for him.
How do you know?
373
00:19:10,607 --> 00:19:13,152
I'm the one that's been with him
for these last 18 years.
374
00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:15,946
You've never been close to him.
You don't even try.
375
00:19:16,029 --> 00:19:19,283
I mean, honestly, there is times
I think you don't even like him.
376
00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:22,911
That's what you think?
377
00:19:24,496 --> 00:19:25,956
I love our son.
378
00:19:27,207 --> 00:19:31,461
I always have. Has it been hard
to connect with him? Yeah, it has been.
379
00:19:32,004 --> 00:19:34,548
I thought he'd be more
like me or like you.
380
00:19:34,631 --> 00:19:37,885
He's not like either one of us
or anyone else I've ever met.
381
00:19:38,802 --> 00:19:39,678
I know.
Yeah.
382
00:19:39,761 --> 00:19:42,097
You remember his ninth birthday?
383
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:43,140
He wanted an igloo.
384
00:19:43,223 --> 00:19:45,267
And what did I do?
You built it.
385
00:19:45,350 --> 00:19:48,103
Yeah,
I spent 19 hours hauling and stacking
386
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,230
fricking ice blocks into the backyard
387
00:19:50,314 --> 00:19:52,482
just so my son would notice I was there.
388
00:19:53,192 --> 00:19:54,109
So he would like me.
389
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:56,195
And he wouldn't even go
inside because...
390
00:19:56,278 --> 00:19:58,488
the ice blocks weren't
lined up precisely.
391
00:19:58,572 --> 00:20:00,908
Okay.
You're not the only one in the family
392
00:20:00,991 --> 00:20:02,492
who has an autistic kid, Elsa.
393
00:20:04,494 --> 00:20:05,996
Can I get you anything else?
394
00:20:06,079 --> 00:20:08,540
No. Thank you.
No, thank you.
395
00:20:13,086 --> 00:20:14,296
Not it.
396
00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:21,220
Hey!
397
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:25,891
Hi.
398
00:20:27,184 --> 00:20:30,270
I just came to get Beth's cake pan back.
399
00:20:30,354 --> 00:20:31,772
Okay.
400
00:20:32,356 --> 00:20:33,941
I could've brought it to school.
401
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:35,442
Weird.
402
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:37,152
Should I come in or, um...
403
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,654
I'll just hang here.
404
00:20:40,822 --> 00:20:41,990
Here you go.
405
00:20:42,532 --> 00:20:45,410
It's been washed twice...
once by me and once by my mom.
406
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,371
'Cause that's my mom.
Thanks.
407
00:20:48,163 --> 00:20:51,166
That was nice of you to punch that girl
in the face for my sister.
408
00:20:51,250 --> 00:20:53,126
Oh, yeah, you're welcome.
409
00:20:53,835 --> 00:20:56,421
Hey, do you want to go out sometime?
410
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,133
Go out?
411
00:21:00,884 --> 00:21:03,720
With you?
Yeah. That's what I was thinking.
412
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:06,139
I'm sorry. I don't really date.
413
00:21:06,223 --> 00:21:08,141
It's just not a distraction I need.
414
00:21:08,225 --> 00:21:10,894
I'm gonna get a track scholarship
and get out of this town.
415
00:21:10,978 --> 00:21:12,771
Oh. Well, fair enough.
416
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,984
I'm probably gonna change your mind
about that dating thing, though.
417
00:21:17,067 --> 00:21:18,735
You know, I kind of grow on people.
418
00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:21,238
Stop the presses!
A girl wants to go out with me.
419
00:21:21,863 --> 00:21:23,198
Oh. Hello.
420
00:21:24,950 --> 00:21:26,159
I got to go.
421
00:21:32,749 --> 00:21:35,502
Her name's Bree, Bree.
422
00:21:35,585 --> 00:21:37,838
And she likes something
called vegan taquitos,
423
00:21:37,921 --> 00:21:40,299
and she has a cat named Simba.
I don't love cats.
424
00:21:40,382 --> 00:21:43,218
Do you think she'd get rid of it?
Do not ask her that.
425
00:21:44,344 --> 00:21:46,388
Where are you gonna go?
I thought about it.
426
00:21:46,471 --> 00:21:49,933
I'll take her to Techtropolis.
Take a date to an appliance store?
427
00:21:50,017 --> 00:21:52,394
I have to go where I'm comfortable.
Oh, my God.
428
00:21:52,477 --> 00:21:56,189
It'll be fun. We can sample different TVs
and see which one has the best clarity.
429
00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:58,150
I know,
but we'll see if she gets it right.
430
00:21:58,233 --> 00:21:59,943
She wants to go for coffee.
431
00:22:01,028 --> 00:22:02,863
Coffee?
Mmhmm.
432
00:22:03,697 --> 00:22:05,615
Who goes out for coffee?
433
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:08,994
Hey. Relax. This is gonna be okay.
434
00:22:09,828 --> 00:22:11,330
No, it's not.
435
00:22:12,748 --> 00:22:14,207
Yeah, no, it's not.
436
00:22:15,417 --> 00:22:18,712
Being in a loud,
unfamiliar place can be hard for me.
437
00:22:18,795 --> 00:22:21,798
I can't think.
I can't listen. I just freeze.
438
00:22:22,382 --> 00:22:24,301
But... don't worry.
439
00:22:24,384 --> 00:22:25,343
I have a strategy.
440
00:22:26,595 --> 00:22:27,971
Floor here's kind of sticky.
441
00:22:30,057 --> 00:22:32,809
Did you know that some frogs have pads
on their feet
442
00:22:32,893 --> 00:22:36,188
that secrete a thin layer of mucus
so to help them climb things?
443
00:22:37,439 --> 00:22:38,982
What's with the headphones?
444
00:22:39,775 --> 00:22:42,986
Oh. I just turned on
the noisecancellation feature.
445
00:22:43,070 --> 00:22:45,405
Need a little protection
from the racket.
446
00:22:52,329 --> 00:22:55,082
Baby,
those are some serious bug eyes you got.
447
00:22:55,665 --> 00:22:56,500
What?
448
00:23:00,462 --> 00:23:02,047
Mamacita...
449
00:23:02,589 --> 00:23:03,590
your ass is on the phone?
450
00:23:06,635 --> 00:23:09,221
I don't like cats. Would you
be willing to get rid of Simba?
451
00:23:13,975 --> 00:23:15,602
Yo, I'm clocking out.
452
00:23:15,685 --> 00:23:18,063
Can you see my nipples through here?
Yes.
453
00:23:18,146 --> 00:23:20,774
Good. I was standing
in front of the air conditioner.
454
00:23:20,857 --> 00:23:22,526
So, how's it going with the ladies?
455
00:23:23,401 --> 00:23:25,862
I'm not dating anymore.
It's too difficult.
456
00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:29,950
You have to guess what people are
thinking, and not just people, girls.
457
00:23:30,033 --> 00:23:32,160
They think I'm weird.
You are weird. So what?
458
00:23:32,244 --> 00:23:35,455
The French eat snails. That's weird,
but you know they're getting laid.
459
00:23:35,539 --> 00:23:37,040
Hey, look. Red's back.
460
00:23:38,166 --> 00:23:39,417
Ask her out.
461
00:23:39,501 --> 00:23:40,877
Go, go, go!
462
00:23:40,961 --> 00:23:41,962
Go!
463
00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:43,547
Go.
464
00:23:54,933 --> 00:23:56,643
Laser or inkjet?
465
00:23:56,726 --> 00:23:58,228
Oh, uh...
466
00:23:58,311 --> 00:24:01,189
I don't know.
I didn't really do any research.
467
00:24:01,273 --> 00:24:04,234
Well, lucky for you, I love research,
468
00:24:04,317 --> 00:24:05,944
and I know all about these printers.
469
00:24:06,027 --> 00:24:07,237
You should get this one.
470
00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:09,781
The other ones are garbage
and should be set on fire.
471
00:24:09,865 --> 00:24:11,867
Wow. Thanks.
472
00:24:11,950 --> 00:24:13,702
That's actually really helpful.
473
00:24:32,429 --> 00:24:34,472
Would you like to go on a date with me?
474
00:24:34,556 --> 00:24:37,726
That's the reason I came over here,
not to help you with printers.
475
00:24:42,564 --> 00:24:43,398
Okay.
476
00:24:44,941 --> 00:24:46,151
Ow!
477
00:24:46,234 --> 00:24:47,652
Gold rush
478
00:24:49,237 --> 00:24:52,032
Hey, I got... uh!
479
00:24:53,992 --> 00:24:55,243
I got to dig for it
480
00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:56,369
He got a date!
481
00:24:56,453 --> 00:24:57,787
Hey, hey, hey
482
00:24:58,872 --> 00:24:59,706
Hey, hon.
483
00:24:59,789 --> 00:25:01,541
You going to hockey?
Yeah.
484
00:25:01,625 --> 00:25:03,126
I shouldn't be home late.
485
00:25:04,252 --> 00:25:05,462
Honey.
486
00:25:06,254 --> 00:25:08,965
I'm sorry about dinner the other night.
487
00:25:09,049 --> 00:25:12,093
I'm just stressed, and...
it was a really nice idea.
488
00:25:12,177 --> 00:25:14,471
It's all right. Oh, listen, I...
489
00:25:14,554 --> 00:25:15,889
I got you something.
490
00:25:16,556 --> 00:25:17,807
You love to dance, right?
491
00:25:18,725 --> 00:25:22,103
You should check this out,
have some fun, maybe make a friend.
492
00:25:22,187 --> 00:25:23,396
You look good.
493
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:24,689
Sheesh!
494
00:25:24,773 --> 00:25:27,317
I don't even know
if I'll be able to dance anymore.
495
00:25:27,400 --> 00:25:29,861
Mamacita say, "Oh, oh"
496
00:25:29,945 --> 00:25:32,489
Mi amigo say, "Oh, Oh"
497
00:25:32,572 --> 00:25:35,033
Everybody say, "Oh, oh"
498
00:25:35,116 --> 00:25:37,244
We got your drummer there,
"Oh, oh"
499
00:25:37,327 --> 00:25:39,704
Mamacita say, "Oh, oh"
500
00:25:39,788 --> 00:25:41,539
Mi amigo say, "Oh, Oh"
501
00:25:41,623 --> 00:25:44,834
Thank you so much. That was so much fun!
502
00:25:44,918 --> 00:25:47,671
Oh, you're welcome! You're great.
You're a dancer, huh?
503
00:25:47,754 --> 00:25:49,881
What? Oh, no. I mean, forever ago.
504
00:25:49,965 --> 00:25:53,093
I was the captain
of the dance squad in college.
505
00:25:53,176 --> 00:25:54,469
Oh.
Yeah.
506
00:25:54,552 --> 00:25:56,805
We ranked nationally three times,
almost four.
507
00:25:56,888 --> 00:25:59,015
We were robbed, but whatever.
I'm over it.
508
00:25:59,766 --> 00:26:02,811
Hey, a few of us are gonna go grab
a drink. You want to come?
509
00:26:02,894 --> 00:26:05,480
Um, uh...
510
00:26:06,648 --> 00:26:07,857
Sure.
511
00:26:09,693 --> 00:26:11,278
This is so much fun.
512
00:26:12,904 --> 00:26:15,198
I feel like I'm back in college again.
513
00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:20,203
Want another drink?
514
00:26:20,912 --> 00:26:23,290
Um... no, thanks.
515
00:26:23,373 --> 00:26:26,543
I think I've escaped
my real life long enough.
516
00:26:27,877 --> 00:26:32,215
I don't know why I said that.
I love my life. I love it. Love it.
517
00:26:32,299 --> 00:26:33,633
This one's on me.
518
00:26:40,307 --> 00:26:44,060
When you told me we were having dinner
in the Techtropolis parking lot,
519
00:26:44,144 --> 00:26:45,645
I thought you were kidding.
520
00:26:46,479 --> 00:26:47,522
No, I don't do that.
521
00:26:48,356 --> 00:26:49,649
Oh.
522
00:26:49,733 --> 00:26:51,151
You're very pretty.
Thanks.
523
00:26:51,234 --> 00:26:53,737
I always thought my nose was too big.
524
00:26:53,820 --> 00:26:56,990
A little, but the rest of
your face makes up for it.
525
00:26:59,743 --> 00:27:00,827
Wow.
526
00:27:00,910 --> 00:27:02,203
You're really honest, huh?
527
00:27:02,287 --> 00:27:03,955
Yes. Is that bad?
528
00:27:05,123 --> 00:27:06,958
No. It's refreshing.
529
00:27:07,042 --> 00:27:08,960
Tell me more.
Okay.
530
00:27:09,044 --> 00:27:11,713
I'm really good at fixing computers,
531
00:27:11,796 --> 00:27:14,174
and biology is my favorite subject
in school.
532
00:27:14,257 --> 00:27:15,383
Girls don't like me.
533
00:27:15,467 --> 00:27:18,803
I love penguins,
but I'm not supposed to talk about it.
534
00:27:18,887 --> 00:27:20,388
I've never had sex before,
535
00:27:20,472 --> 00:27:22,807
and I have a pet turtle named Edison,
536
00:27:22,891 --> 00:27:25,602
who's named after Thomas Edison,
but he's not as smart.
537
00:27:28,438 --> 00:27:29,647
You're hilarious.
538
00:27:29,731 --> 00:27:30,774
Thank you.
539
00:27:33,735 --> 00:27:34,903
You never had sex?
540
00:27:35,487 --> 00:27:36,404
No.
541
00:27:38,823 --> 00:27:39,657
Want to?
542
00:27:50,710 --> 00:27:51,628
What are you doing?
543
00:27:51,711 --> 00:27:55,298
I just came to see if you changed
your mind about going out with me.
544
00:27:56,758 --> 00:27:57,801
I brought you this.
545
00:27:57,884 --> 00:28:00,095
What is up with your family
bringing me sweets?
546
00:28:00,970 --> 00:28:02,430
I don't know. I like you.
547
00:28:03,306 --> 00:28:04,140
Why?
548
00:28:04,224 --> 00:28:05,517
Uh...
549
00:28:07,143 --> 00:28:11,147
'Cause most people don't stand up
to assholes, but you do.
550
00:28:25,495 --> 00:28:26,955
Then there was Mel.
Mmhmm.
551
00:28:27,038 --> 00:28:29,290
That was my longest relationship,
like a month.
552
00:28:29,374 --> 00:28:30,417
Wow. A month.
553
00:28:30,500 --> 00:28:32,043
Stop it.
554
00:28:32,711 --> 00:28:35,130
Why am I telling you this?
Let's talk about something else.
555
00:28:35,213 --> 00:28:37,424
What? No. I want to hear about
your month with Mel.
556
00:28:40,885 --> 00:28:43,680
I don't know. I like what I do, I guess.
557
00:28:43,763 --> 00:28:46,057
Mmhmm.
I don't mean my job necessarily.
558
00:28:46,141 --> 00:28:47,559
Just my life.
559
00:28:48,351 --> 00:28:51,062
I wake up when I want.
I do what I want. I go where I want.
560
00:28:51,146 --> 00:28:53,606
Last week, I wanted to go
to the mountains, so I did.
561
00:28:53,690 --> 00:28:56,109
I didn't have to plan anything
or run it by anyone.
562
00:28:56,192 --> 00:28:58,862
I mean, that may be weird, but I just...
563
00:28:58,945 --> 00:29:00,029
I need that.
564
00:29:04,284 --> 00:29:06,202
Is that totally lame or what?
565
00:29:08,496 --> 00:29:10,165
No, that sounds great.
566
00:29:10,248 --> 00:29:12,834
I mean, you're a little old for that,
but, you know?
567
00:29:13,334 --> 00:29:15,420
Thanks.
568
00:29:16,045 --> 00:29:18,923
I think, if it were really, really cold,
569
00:29:19,007 --> 00:29:20,592
like Antarctica cold,
570
00:29:20,675 --> 00:29:23,178
the coldness would feel like a sound.
571
00:29:23,261 --> 00:29:26,014
The cold would be so intense
that you could hear it.
572
00:29:26,097 --> 00:29:27,515
I would like to hear that sound.
573
00:29:37,275 --> 00:29:40,445
I slip softly through
574
00:29:41,029 --> 00:29:44,365
Never been in a dorm. This isn't
what I thought it would smell like.
575
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,827
Yeah. My roommate makes a lot of ramen.
576
00:29:47,911 --> 00:29:51,331
Sometimes,
being touched makes me... jumpy.
577
00:29:51,414 --> 00:29:54,209
It has to be hard touch, uh, pressure.
578
00:29:54,292 --> 00:29:56,377
I like pressure. I don't like soft.
579
00:29:56,461 --> 00:29:58,880
Is that okay to say on the first date?
580
00:29:58,963 --> 00:30:00,840
Ooh, ooh, ooh
581
00:30:03,510 --> 00:30:05,053
Ooh, ooh, ooh
582
00:30:05,136 --> 00:30:10,350
It'll burn, burn,
burn, burn, burn
583
00:30:10,433 --> 00:30:12,644
Burn us both alive
584
00:30:17,106 --> 00:30:17,941
Aah!
585
00:30:18,024 --> 00:30:19,484
What the hell?
586
00:30:21,319 --> 00:30:23,321
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
587
00:30:23,404 --> 00:30:24,864
What is wrong with you?
588
00:30:24,948 --> 00:30:28,618
Seriously, are you retarded? Is there
something wrong with your brain?
589
00:30:31,913 --> 00:30:33,957
Get the hell out of my room.
590
00:30:38,503 --> 00:30:40,380
Sometimes, when I feel most alone,
591
00:30:40,463 --> 00:30:42,507
I imagine myself in that ice...
592
00:30:42,590 --> 00:30:45,760
frozen, unable to move, but safe.
593
00:30:55,270 --> 00:30:59,190
I thought technical school would be
dumb, but I actually really like it.
594
00:31:00,483 --> 00:31:03,820
Oh, hey. There he is, the "twat" guy.
595
00:31:04,696 --> 00:31:05,864
What's wrong?
596
00:31:07,448 --> 00:31:09,075
Sam?
597
00:31:20,378 --> 00:31:22,422
Here. Careful, it's hot.
598
00:31:24,299 --> 00:31:26,759
Hey, dude, don't feel too bad.
599
00:31:26,843 --> 00:31:28,678
The first time's always a shit show.
600
00:31:29,512 --> 00:31:33,975
My first time was on a PingPong table,
and it collapsed like two seconds in.
601
00:31:34,058 --> 00:31:36,853
My balls got all wrapped up in the net.
Really freaked her out.
602
00:31:38,021 --> 00:31:40,315
How about you, Case?
Was it crappy your first time?
603
00:31:40,398 --> 00:31:41,774
Okay, gross.
604
00:31:41,858 --> 00:31:44,485
I'm not discussing my sex life
in front of my brother.
605
00:31:44,569 --> 00:31:46,654
Not that there's anything to discuss.
606
00:31:49,532 --> 00:31:51,242
Sometimes, I wish I was normal.
607
00:31:51,326 --> 00:31:52,660
Well, dude...
608
00:31:53,286 --> 00:31:54,370
nobody's normal.
609
00:32:20,355 --> 00:32:23,358
In fourth grade,
my biology teacher, Mr. Durocher
610
00:32:23,441 --> 00:32:27,403
he was fat
said penguins are similar to humans...
611
00:32:28,696 --> 00:32:32,408
because once they copulate, they
stay with the same partner for life.
612
00:32:33,159 --> 00:32:35,453
So, what about you?
What's your life like?
613
00:32:35,536 --> 00:32:37,538
Mm.
614
00:32:38,081 --> 00:32:41,000
Well, ironically, when I was in college,
615
00:32:41,084 --> 00:32:43,211
I also dated a girl for about a month.
616
00:32:44,712 --> 00:32:46,506
Mm.
617
00:32:46,589 --> 00:32:49,258
And I am a hairdresser.
618
00:32:49,342 --> 00:32:50,593
Yours is too short.
619
00:32:52,470 --> 00:32:55,014
You're funny. And kind of mean.
620
00:32:57,892 --> 00:33:00,144
Yeah, I'm always mean to people I like.
621
00:33:00,770 --> 00:33:02,939
I think it's 'cause I expect so much.
622
00:33:03,815 --> 00:33:05,108
So you like me.
623
00:33:08,027 --> 00:33:10,071
But according to the 2010 census,
624
00:33:10,154 --> 00:33:12,365
which is the most recent data
I could acquire,
625
00:33:12,448 --> 00:33:15,034
49% of marriages end in divorce.
626
00:33:17,662 --> 00:33:19,414
Sorry. Um...
627
00:33:21,666 --> 00:33:23,501
You know, um...
628
00:33:23,584 --> 00:33:26,421
if you turn the heat up
on your dishwasher,
629
00:33:26,504 --> 00:33:29,882
you won't have those ugly white spots
on the glasses. Just so...
630
00:33:42,353 --> 00:33:43,813
Penguins mate for life.
631
00:33:45,648 --> 00:33:48,317
So penguins aren't like people.
632
00:33:53,031 --> 00:33:54,490
They're better.
633
00:34:15,553 --> 00:34:17,680
I wonder if they ever get tired
of swimming.
634
00:34:18,181 --> 00:34:19,307
They don't.
635
00:34:23,644 --> 00:34:26,981
You know, Casey...
told me what happened...
636
00:34:28,357 --> 00:34:29,650
with the girl.
637
00:34:31,861 --> 00:34:33,279
I wish I had a time machine.
638
00:34:33,362 --> 00:34:36,699
I would go back in time
and never ask her out
639
00:34:36,783 --> 00:34:39,243
and also maybe visit
the Middle Ages because...
640
00:34:39,327 --> 00:34:40,578
jousting.
641
00:34:41,621 --> 00:34:45,208
Look, I don't know about some
of that stuff you're into,
642
00:34:45,291 --> 00:34:48,377
but girls I know about, okay?
And they're tough.
643
00:34:49,670 --> 00:34:52,799
I'm proud of you
for putting yourself out there.
644
00:34:53,800 --> 00:34:58,096
I should never go on another date.
I should just stay away from girls.
645
00:34:58,971 --> 00:35:01,849
Sam, look, you got some stuff
to figure out, but you will.
646
00:35:03,643 --> 00:35:04,894
You're a good guy.
647
00:35:04,977 --> 00:35:07,188
You're sensitive, and you're funny,
648
00:35:07,271 --> 00:35:10,274
and the woman who ends up
with you will be lucky.
649
00:35:11,651 --> 00:35:13,319
You want to marry your best friend.
650
00:35:14,654 --> 00:35:15,530
Edison?
651
00:35:15,613 --> 00:35:16,572
No.
652
00:35:17,198 --> 00:35:18,491
Not your turtle, Sam.
653
00:35:18,574 --> 00:35:20,993
You said my best friend.
He's my best friend.
654
00:35:22,078 --> 00:35:23,121
I just...
655
00:35:24,038 --> 00:35:28,292
I meant you want to be with someone
who appreciates you for what you are.
656
00:35:29,127 --> 00:35:32,797
You know, who loves all
the little odd things about you...
657
00:35:33,506 --> 00:35:34,590
who gets you.
658
00:35:37,969 --> 00:35:39,762
Penguins mate for life, you know?
659
00:35:41,389 --> 00:35:42,515
Yeah?
660
00:35:43,850 --> 00:35:45,184
Well, good for them.
661
00:35:46,853 --> 00:35:50,565
So, how are you feeling now?
Still ready to give up on dating?
662
00:35:50,648 --> 00:35:53,317
I don't know.
My dad said to find someone
663
00:35:53,401 --> 00:35:56,571
who appreciates me for what I am,
which is a weirdo.
664
00:35:57,530 --> 00:35:58,614
We talked a lot.
665
00:35:58,698 --> 00:36:00,158
Glad to hear it.
666
00:36:00,241 --> 00:36:03,411
And that makes sense.
You're easy to talk to.
667
00:36:07,206 --> 00:36:08,291
Yeah.
668
00:36:09,041 --> 00:36:10,376
You're easy to talk to, too,
669
00:36:10,459 --> 00:36:13,671
which is good 'cause,
otherwise, you'd go broke.
670
00:36:18,259 --> 00:36:21,179
When a male gentoo penguin
chooses a mate,
671
00:36:21,262 --> 00:36:22,346
he makes an offering.
672
00:36:23,139 --> 00:36:24,682
He finds a pebble,
673
00:36:24,765 --> 00:36:27,101
often taking the time
to find the smoothest one,
674
00:36:27,185 --> 00:36:29,020
and presents it to the female.
675
00:36:29,854 --> 00:36:32,690
I'm a human,
so it would be weird to offer a pebble.
676
00:36:33,357 --> 00:36:34,233
Julia.
677
00:36:36,277 --> 00:36:39,197
I've decided I want to give you my brain.
Really?
678
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:40,448
After I die.
679
00:36:41,115 --> 00:36:42,950
Oh, Sam, that's so great.
680
00:36:45,369 --> 00:36:46,871
You're gonna help so many people.
681
00:36:48,664 --> 00:36:50,291
Good smile.
682
00:36:50,374 --> 00:36:51,751
It's not creepy at all.
683
00:36:51,834 --> 00:36:53,252
I've been practicing.
684
00:36:53,336 --> 00:36:54,503
Yeah, I can tell.
685
00:36:56,839 --> 00:36:59,425
If the female places the pebble
in her nest,
686
00:36:59,508 --> 00:37:01,219
she accepts him as a mate.
687
00:37:01,302 --> 00:37:03,846
And as you already know,
penguins mate for life.
50485
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