Original subtitles

( Boys laughing )

You ever fart and sneeze at the same time?

You ever barf up

you ever fart and sneeze at the same time?

Something you didn't eat?

You ever fart and sneeze at the same time?

I once barfed a whole shrimp.

You ever fart and sneeze at the same time?

Once I barfed so hard,

I pulled a bean out of my nose.

Once I barfed so hard,

oh!

Once I barfed so hard,

that was gross. Bet that was slimy.

Once I barfed so hard,

oh.

Once I barfed so hard,

you know when you're sick

once I barfed so hard,

and you're waiting to suck it down?

Once I barfed so hard,

you could hawk one of those 10 feet.

Once I barfed so hard,

no. It's better to blow them

once I barfed so hard,

out your nose.

Once I barfed so hard,

it's better to suck.

Once I barfed so hard,

those aren't the best loogeys.

Once I barfed so hard,

my cousin hawked a loogey

once I barfed so hard,

from the empire state building.

Once I barfed so hard,

killed a lady. He's in prison.

Once I barfed so hard,

in prison for snot.

Once I barfed so hard,

boom! Boom!

Once I barfed so hard,

( laughter )

Once I barfed so hard,

okay, you guys, come on.

Once I barfed so hard,

we place here in the time capsule--

once I barfed so hard,

the sacred shoe box.

Once I barfed so hard,

okay, in the sacred shoe box--

once I barfed so hard,

the things we do not understand--

once I barfed so hard,

to be opened again

once I barfed so hard,

when all the mysteries of the universe

once I barfed so hard,

have been revealed to us.

Once I barfed so hard,

who's first? Kevin.

Once I barfed so hard,

I found it in my mom's secret drawer

in this plastic box.

I found it in my mom's secret drawer

I know what this is.

It goes in the bathtub drain.

I know what this is.

It's a diaphragm.

I know what this is.

It prevents the passage of sperm

I know what this is.

Into the uterus.

I know what this is.

How do you know?

I know what this is.

I saw it on nightline.

I know what this is.

I'm telling you, Frank,

I know what this is.

It's for the bathtub.

I know what this is.

I think it's a travel drinking cup.

I know what this is.

She'll never miss it.

I know what this is.

Don't drink out of it.

I know what this is.

Yeah.

I know what this is.

Frank: Brad.

I know what this is.

I found it in my sister's room.

I believe it's some kind of weapon.

I found it in my sister's room.

A picture of my dead mother.

Why put it in?

A picture of my dead mother.

My dad keeps her pictures in the attic

a picture of my dead mother.

And says she looked like grace Kelly.

A picture of my dead mother.

Who's grace Kelly?

She was a famous clown.

Who's grace Kelly?

She was a princess, and also.

Who's grace Kelly?

I don't know what it's like

who's grace Kelly?

To have a mother.

Who's grace Kelly?

We could tell you.

Who's grace Kelly?

You can't tell somebody something like that.

Who's grace Kelly?

Brad: Have you ever noticed

that girls don't fart?

Brad: Have you ever noticed

it looks like a boob.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

yeah. Make them fly around.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

got you.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

my boobs are bigger than yours.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

try to catch my boob.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

you've got a mosquito-bite boob.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

why don't girls spit?

Brad: Have you ever noticed

they're hiding something.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

the rules have changed.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

it's a battle of the sexes,

Brad: Have you ever noticed

and believe me, we are way behind.

Brad: Have you ever noticed

( rap music playing )

¶ You know you make me want to shout ¶

¶ put my hands up and shout ¶

¶ you know you make me want to shout ¶

¶ look, my heart's jumping ¶

¶ you know you make me want to shout ¶

uh!

¶ You know you make me want to shout ¶

¶ come on now and shout ¶

¶ you know you make me want to shout ¶

shit.

¶ You know you make me want to shout ¶

I can't dance.

¶ You know you make me want to shout ¶

( whistling )

¶ You know you make me want to shout ¶

you see this, Frank?

This little seedling represents

you see this, Frank?

An entire species of marsh grass.

You see this, Frank?

If it lives, the wetlands survive,

the mortlake turtle can return,

if it lives, the wetlands survive,

and the glossy ibis

if it lives, the wetlands survive,

won't lose another nesting place.

If it lives, the wetlands survive,

dad, we'll be late for school.

If it lives, the wetlands survive,

hey, hey, look at this.

Ha, ha!

Hey, hey, look at this.

You won a prize?

Hey, hey, look at this.

Yeah.

Hey, hey, look at this.

What is that?

Homework.

They're assigning Cosmopolitan as homework?

Homework.

No. They assigned this.

Homework.

You can't relate that to the real world.

Homework.

Like how?

Homework.

Like was mom a virgin

homework.

When you married her?

Homework.

Are you studying, religion?

Homework.

Sex. Tell me.

Homework.

No.

Homework.

That's good coffee. Fresh-brewed?

Homework.

Instant.

Homework.

Do you have to have sex?

This can't be instant.

Do you have to have sex?

We ran out of beans.

Do you have to have sex?

What base is a kiss?

Do you have to have sex?

Where is the birth canal?

Do you have to have sex?

You never have to have sex.

Do you have to have sex?

The birth canal is there.

Do you have to have sex?

You shouldn't have sex unless you're in love.

Do you have to have sex?

Why not?

Do you have to have sex?

It's about not having babies

do you have to have sex?

With people you don't know.

Do you have to have sex?

There's a spot on a woman you can touch

do you have to have sex?

To drive her completely insane.

Do you have to have sex?

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

In my experience, there is no such place.

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

Dad.

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

When I grow up,

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

Do I have to have hair all over?

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

You saw your sister naked?

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

Sort of.

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

I was in the laundry basket.

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

Hey, Stacey.

I don't think the magazine's a good idea.

Hi, Brad.

I saw you in the drugstore.

Hi, Brad.

You were buying gum.

Hi, Brad.

Are you going to the dance?

Hi, Brad.

I'm thinking of going to it.

Hi, Brad.

Can I wear your jacket today, Brad?

What do you want for it?

I want to take you

to the closet and.

I want to take you

no way. You're so bad.

I want to take you

( bell rings )

I want to take you

what did you say?

I want to take you

told her what I wanted.

I want to take you

she's not that kind of girl.

I want to take you

all girls are that kind of girl.

I want to take you

she didn't used to be a girl.

I want to take you

hey, guys.

I want to take you

what are we looking at?

Woman: Oh. Oh. Oh, mmm.

What's that?

Oh, God. Oh, yes. Oh!

What's that?

Think it's an elbow.

What's that?

What's it doing with that other elbow?

What's that?

Doesn't look like anything

I ever want to do.

Doesn't look like anything

ah! Ah!

Doesn't look like anything

will you stop cleaning?

Doesn't look like anything

why do you do that?

Doesn't look like anything

my dad demands order and sanitation.

Doesn't look like anything

I know a place where the girls

are naked all the time,

I know a place where the girls

where guys can see naked girls

I know a place where the girls

twenty four hours a day--

I know a place where the girls

for anyone with guts and 100 bucks.

I know a place where the girls

I don't believe it.

I know a place where the girls

what are you talking about?

I know a place where the girls

the city.

I know a place where the girls

we're not allowed to go.

I know a place where the girls

in the city, there are no rules.

I know a place where the girls

everything is available

I know a place where the girls

for a price.

I know a place where the girls

luckily our needs are small.

I know a place where the girls

what are our needs?

I know a place where the girls

to see a woman naked.

I know a place where the girls

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ but you can give them to the birds and bees ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ I need money ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

let me see the money.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

¶ your love gives me such a thrill ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ but your love don't pay my bills ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ I need money ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

¶ that's what I want ¶

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

all right!

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

( cheering )

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

keep it moving.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

come on. Come on. Give me the money.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

keep it running smoothly.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

looks beautiful on you. Thank you.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

Kevin: That's a lot of milk money.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

Brad: Some things are important.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

what do you need this money for anyway?

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

we're going to buy a pros--

¶ the best things in life are free ¶

--thetic leg for his dog.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

his dog lost his leg.

¶ The best things in life are free ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

ha, ha, ha!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

woo!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

woo-hoo!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

what did you tell your dad?

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

I'm at Kevin's house.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

Brad: I said I'm at Frank's house.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

is the city big?

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

huge!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

lots of naked ladies.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

ha, ha, ha!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

if I had my own naked lady,

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

I'd never leave my room.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

you got the money?

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

we've got everything.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

ha, ha, ha! Woo!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

ha, ha, ha!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

hey!

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

¶ everybody wants to be closer to free ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ yeah ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ oh, yeah, everybody one everybody two ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ everybody three ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ everybody needs to touch you know, now and then ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ and everybody wants a good, good friend ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

ah.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

oh, no.

¶ Ya-hoo! ¶

¶ closer to free ¶

¶ ya-hoo! ¶

¶ ooh-ah ¶

I want to go back.

( Humming the William tell overture )

( Beep beep )

( Humming the William tell overture )

Hey, the footpath's for virgins.

( Humming the William tell overture )

We are virgins.

( Humming the William tell overture )

Hey, not for long.

( Humming the William tell overture )

If you get killed, I'm going home.

( Humming the William tell overture )

Oh, beautiful.

Oh, my God. Do you believe this?

This woman gave birth

oh, my God. Do you believe this?

To her own head.

Oh, my God. Do you believe this?

It sang to her.

Oh, my God. Do you believe this?

Wow.

Oh, my God. Do you believe this?

Wow.

Oh, my God. Do you believe this?

Cash, where are you going?

Don't ask me that.

Never ask me that!

Don't ask me that.

Okay I'm sorry. I just forgot.

Don't ask me that.

Jeez.

Don't ask me that.

( Door slams )

Don't ask me that.

Guys, come here.

Don't ask me that.

Whoa.

Woman: Yeah. You ready?

Woman: Yeah, I am.

Woman: Yeah. You ready?

This will be tough.

How do we tell the prostitutes?

This will be tough.

How do we know we're not asking

this will be tough.

A math teacher?

This will be tough.

We've got to try it.

This will be tough.

They need to see the money.

This will be tough.

Excuse me, miss.

Uh, ma'am--

get out of my way.

Uh, ma'am--

excuse me,

are you a prostitute?

Excuse me,

what?

Excuse me,

will you take your clothes off for $103.62?

Excuse me,

uh!

Excuse me,

ooh.

Excuse me,

thanks, Kevin.

Excuse me,

what?

Excuse me,

what did I do?

Excuse me,

( horns honk )

All right?

( Horns honk )

Pssst.

( Horns honk )

Guys.

( Horns honk )

You guys need some help?

( Horns honk )

You talking to us?

( Horns honk )

Yeah.

( Horns honk )

We want to see a naked lady.

( Horns honk )

Do you have money?

( Horns honk )

$103.62.

( Horns honk )

Really?

( Horns honk )

That will do it.

( Horns honk )

Come on.

( Horns honk )

Hurry up. Come on. Come on.

Where?

There are naked women in here?

Guys, you got to trust me.

Why should we trust you?

Guys, you got to trust me.

I got a gun.

Guys, you got to trust me.

Woman: Okay, open up, big boy.

Mmm.

Woman: Okay, open up, big boy.

Mmm.

Woman: Okay, open up, big boy.

Okay, backpacks. Come on. Do it. Do it now.

Woman: Okay, open up, big boy.

I'm full. I'm full.

Woman: Okay, open up, big boy.

He's got a gun.

Get down.

He's got a gun.

Stay.

He's got a gun.

Stay.

Uh!

You okay?

All: Yeah.

You okay?

Get us out of here!

Wait a minute, son of a bitch!

I want my money!

Oh, goddamn it!

I want my money!

All: Aw.

I want my money!

You all right?

I want my money!

All: Yeah.

I want my money!

How am i going to get home?

I'll get in such trouble.

How am i going to get home?

Us, too.

How am i going to get home?

Shit.

How am i going to get home?

Well, I'm out of here.

How am i going to get home?

You'd better go.

How am i going to get home?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

Ma'am?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

No, thanks.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

Are you sure you don't need something?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

I need 100 bucks,

do you need any help, ma'am?

Or I'm going to get smacked.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

You got that?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

Yes, I do.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

You can have it. You saved my life.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

What are you doing with all that money?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

We wanted to see a naked lady.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

You know what?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

Why don't you take that money

do you need any help, ma'am?

And go home?

Do you need any help, ma'am?

I wish I could,

do you need any help, ma'am?

But it means a lot to my friends.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

We just want to look.

Do you need any help, ma'am?

How much looking?

As much as money could buy.

How much looking?

Okay.

How much looking?

Thank you.

Mm-hm.

Thank you.

Pull your shirts over your heads.

Thank you.

You first.

Show me yours, and I'll show you mine.

You first.

Your armpits. Come on.

You first.

Come on.

You first.

Okay, you're not dangerously hairy.

We're not hairy at all.

So, what's your name?

We're not hairy at all.

V.

We're not hairy at all.

Kevin: Like the letter?

We're not hairy at all.

What's it stand for?

We're not hairy at all.

What's your name?

We're not hairy at all.

Kevin.

We're not hairy at all.

I'm Frank.

We're not hairy at all.

Brad.

We're not hairy at all.

Hey, baby.

Hey.

Oh, God.

Come on. Come on.

Excuse me.

What do we do now?

Brad: Just ask her to.

What do we do now?

You see many hookers?

What do we do now?

No. This is our first one.

What do we do now?

Why do you have a picture of grace Kelly?

What do we do now?

I'd like to be like her.

What do we do now?

Without your clothes, is it cold?

What do we do now?

Depends on the room.

What do we do now?

I dream that I'm naked at school

what do we do now?

And I have to get home.

What do we do now?

I do, too.

What do we do now?

The last time, an alligator chased me.

What do we do now?

You ever get that one?

What do we do now?

No.

What do we do now?

Are you married?

What do we do now?

Boy, you ask a lot of questions.

What do we do now?

The meter's ticking.

What do we do now?

She's on the bed.

Do you want this on the bed?

She's on the bed.

I'll stand.

She's on the bed.

I meant me, not you.

She's on the bed.

On the bed.

Bed.

On the bed.

Okay. Come here.

On the bed.

Do you want the lights on or off?

Is she naked yet?

I can't see.

Is she naked yet?

Brad: You turned off the lights.

Is she naked yet?

All set?

What's the matter?

I'm being a gentleman.

What's the matter?

Gentlemen bring enough for everybody.

This is the greatest moment of my life.

Okay. That's it. Time's up.

Any questions?

Okay. That's it. Time's up.

After sex, you smoke.

It's a rule.

After sex, you smoke.

Anybody have any matches?

After sex, you smoke.

Both: No.

I feel it now. We're different.

How?

I feel it now. We're different.

We're men.

Yeah. Men without bikes.

Oh, boy.

Walter, Walter, look.

Don't worry.

Walter, Walter, look.

Your cut's waiting for you.

Walter, Walter, look.

( Knock on door )

Walter, Walter, look.

Relax. Relax.

Walter, Walter, look.

Look, i tell you what.

Walter, Walter, look.

Ow.

Walter, Walter, look.

If you don't get your dough, kill me.

Walter, Walter, look.

Ahem.

What do i look like, huh?

A laundromat? A slot machine?

What do i look like, huh?

'Cause I am not a slot machine.

What do i look like, huh?

You are a slot machine.

What do i look like, huh?

Sorry.

What do i look like, huh?

What? I hurt your feelings?

What do i look like, huh?

No.

What do i look like, huh?

You don't got no feelings.

What do i look like, huh?

Yes, I do.

What do i look like, huh?

I'm a person with feelings.

What do i look like, huh?

Oh. Oh, you're a person now.

What do i look like, huh?

She's not a person,

what do i look like, huh?

Is she, Betty?

What do i look like, huh?

Yeah. She sort of is.

What do i look like, huh?

Who needs you?

What do i look like, huh?

If you were a person,

what do i look like, huh?

You could do whatever you want.

What do i look like, huh?

Ow.

What do i look like, huh?

You do whatever i tell you to do.

What do i look like, huh?

Isn't that right, Betty?

What do i look like, huh?

Yeah.

What do i look like, huh?

I am a person.

What do i look like, huh?

I do what I want. I take what I want.

What do i look like, huh?

Everybody answers to somebody.

What do i look like, huh?

You answer to waltzer.

What do i look like, huh?

Waltzer answers to Jerry the pope.

What do i look like, huh?

Oh, you think so, huh?

What do i look like, huh?

V: Yeah.

What do i look like, huh?

Waltzer steals from Jerry.

What do i look like, huh?

I steal from waltzer.

What do i look like, huh?

They think this is their turf.

What do i look like, huh?

This belongs to me.

What do i look like, huh?

Yeah, you're the man, cash.

What do i look like, huh?

Yeah, that's right.

What do i look like, huh?

( Horn honks )

What do i look like, huh?

( Honk honk )

And the man's got to go out.

( Honk honk )

Don't either of youse two move

( honk honk )

Until I get back.

( Honk honk )

I am a person. I'm a human being.

Tell the asshole I'm borrowing his car.

You can't do that.

Tell the asshole I'm borrowing his car.

Oh, yes, I can.

Tell the asshole I'm borrowing his car.

Didn't you learn

not to play in the rain?

Didn't you learn

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days come clean other days are sneaky ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days take less but most days take more ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days are better than others ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days you wake up with her complaining ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

bye. Thanks.

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

thank you.

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

see you guys.

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days have a grin ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

¶ some days you hear a voice ¶

¶ some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

this is where you live?

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

yep. The yellow house over there.

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

Frank: Do you like it?

¶ Some days are dry some days are leaky ¶

yeah. It's okay.

It was nice meeting you.

Likewise.

It was nice meeting you.

You're very well-behaved.

It was nice meeting you.

Thanks.

It was nice meeting you.

Veronica.

Virginia?

Veronica.

West Virginia.

Veronica.

Bye.

Veronica.

I never really looked.

I didn't see anything.

I never really looked.

( Bicycle bell rings )

Come on, Bentley.

( Bicycle bell rings )

Hey, dad.

( Bicycle bell rings )

Woman: Come on, Amanda.

( Bicycle bell rings )

Hurry, girls.

( Bicycle bell rings )

Your hair looks funny. Ha, ha, ha!

( Bicycle bell rings )

Child: Dad!

( Bicycle bell rings )

Hey!

Looks like TV.

Hey!

( Car doesn't start )

Can I use your phone?

The phone's over here.

Where are your parents?

The phone's over here.

I only have one, a father.

The phone's over here.

He's in the tanahpaya wetlands.

The phone's over here.

This was all once wetlands.

The phone's over here.

He's trying to save the last five acres,

the phone's over here.

But he won't.

The phone's over here.

No money.

The phone's over here.

He teaches science by day

the phone's over here.

And tries to save the wetlands by night.

The phone's over here.

I admire but pity him.

The phone's over here.

You pity him?

The phone's over here.

Well, yeah.

The phone's over here.

His goals aren't realistic.

The phone's over here.

( Horn honks )

The phone's over here.

That's him.

The phone's over here.

Maybe he shouldn't find me here.

The phone's over here.

Why not?

The phone's over here.

He's seen girls before.

The phone's over here.

Hey, dad.

Dad, look over there.

It's a girl.

Dad, look over there.

Dad: I know.

Dad, look over there.

What do you say?

Dad, look over there.

Thank you?

Dad, look over there.

To her. To her.

Dad, look over there.

Dad, this is v.

Frank: V, this is dad.

Dad, this is v.

Hello.

Hello. Dad.

What's she doing here?

Her car broke down.

What's she doing here?

But who is she?

What's she doing here?

She's, uh.

What's she doing here?

She's Brad's new math tutor.

What's she doing here?

She gave me a ride home.

What's she doing here?

Then her car wouldn't start.

What's she doing here?

( Car doesn't start )

What's she doing here?

You know what it is?

It's not the starter.

You know what it is?

Tom. Larry.

Wow!

Tom. Larry.

Frank was telling me what you do.

Tom. Larry.

Really?

Tom. Larry.

Do you enjoy it?

Tom. Larry.

Enjoy it?

Tom. Larry.

Sometimes.

You can move around--

sometimes.

Change of scenery, meet new people.

Sometimes.

I never thought of it that way.

Sometimes.

You seem like a real "people" person.

Sometimes.

Outgoing. Not like me.

Sometimes.

No?

Sometimes.

Thanks.

Sometimes.

I bet you're good at it.

Sometimes.

Well, there's only one way to find out.

Sometimes.

Am I glad to hear you say that.

Sometimes.

It's the one subject

sometimes.

He's having trouble with.

Sometimes.

Could you fit him in?

Him?

Could you fit him in?

Frank.

Could you fit him in?

Frank? Are you kidding?

Could you fit him in?

At his age?

Could you fit him in?

If he doesn't learn now,

could you fit him in?

He's never going to.

Could you fit him in?

I'd teach him myself,

could you fit him in?

But I'm out of practice. Aah!

Could you fit him in?

Ow! Um.

Could you fit him in?

You should never have to practice.

Could you fit him in?

Easy for you to say.

Could you fit him in?

You're a professional.

Could you fit him in?

If us laymen don't use it, we lose it.

Could you fit him in?

Well, how long has it been--

could you fit him in?

You know, since you. Used it?

Could you fit him in?

I use it a little bit every day--

could you fit him in?

The bank, the grocery store--

could you fit him in?

But it's probably been

could you fit him in?

10, 15 years since I was any good at it.

Could you fit him in?

It doesn't come up that often.

Could you fit him in?

Maybe it's the neighborhood.

Tom. Larry.

Maybe it's the neighborhood.

Wow!

Maybe it's the neighborhood.

( Car doesn't start )

Maybe it's the neighborhood.

Well, it's not the battery.

Maybe it's the neighborhood.

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

the alternator, the pump.

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

it could be worn-down plugs.

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

I'll replace them in the morning.

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

could I give you a ride home?

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

um, no. I can walk.

In the morning, I'll check the fuel line,

what do you think?

Can you help him?

I'd rather do something for you.

Can you help him?

What could you do for me?

Can you help him?

Well, it seems like

can you help him?

You've forgotten just about everything.

Can you help him?

I remember the basics.

I'm not concerned about myself.

I remember the basics.

It's Frank I'm worried about.

I remember the basics.

It's not that important to me anymore.

I remember the basics.

Ha, ha!

Poor man.

Ha, ha!

¶ I was born to make you happy ¶

¶ think you're just my style ¶

¶ everywhere I go ¶

¶ telling everyone I know ¶

¶ everywhere I go ¶

¶ baby, I love to see you smile ¶

¶ don't wanna take a trip to China ¶

¶ don't wanna sail up the nile ¶

¶ wouldn't wanna get too far ¶

¶ from where you are ¶

¶ wouldn't wanna get too far ¶

¶ 'cause I love to see you smile ¶

( low whistle )

¶ 'Cause I love to see you smile ¶

Stacey: Look at her.

Oh, my God.

Stacey: Look at her.

Her top is so low.

Stacey: Look at her.

And her skirt is so high.

Stacey: Look at her.

That is bad.

Stacey: Look at her.

It is.

Stacey: Look at her.

It's very, very bad.

Stacey: Look at her.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

I'm not the public health nurse.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Would you, uh, like company?

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Yes, I would.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Hi, Andy.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Man: Hi, boss.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Hi.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Did you hear that?

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

That was bad.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

That was very, very bad.

Are you, uh, what I think you are?

Want a date?

That's not going to work.

Want a date?

That's reverend whitehead.

Want a date?

God doesn't let him do that.

Want a date?

I got you ice cream. You're probably hungry.

Want a date?

What are you doing here?

Want a date?

Where are you going to sleep?

Want a date?

In a hotel, if you'll let me make some money.

Want a date?

You shouldn't be doing this.

Want a date?

What are you, some child missionary?

Want a date?

Sort of.

Want a date?

I did have an idea about the sleeping thing.

Want a date?

Hi, Frank.

She spoke to me.

Hi, Frank.

I speak to her. She never speaks to me.

Hi, Frank.

Hey, Frank. Going to the dance?

I can't dance.

Hey, Frank. Going to the dance?

Me, neither.

Hey, Frank. Going to the dance?

Aren't you going to introduce us?

Hey, Frank. Going to the dance?

I'm Frank's father's sister, aunt v.

Frank and I are very close, aren't we?

I'm Frank's father's sister, aunt v.

We've got to be going. See you.

I'm Frank's father's sister, aunt v.

Stacey: Look at the way she walks.

That is bad.

Stacey: Look at the way she walks.

That is very, very bad.

Stacey: Look at the way she walks.

Are you running away?

No! What are you doing?

Are you running away?

I'm organizing a fund raiser.

Are you running away?

Again?

Are you running away?

There's only two weeks

are you running away?

Before they bulldoze my 5 acres.

Are you running away?

Who will you invite?

Are you running away?

I don't know.

Thanks, pal.

Frank?

You know g? "G"?

Frank?

The math tutor.

Frank?

Yeah?

Frank?

She's a grace Kelly.

Frank?

Yeah.

Ha, ha, ha!

Light.

Reading material.

Light.

Hey.

Light.

Dinner, with everything.

Light.

Oh, great.

And, pajamas.

Oh, great.

Okay.

Oh, great.

Turn around.

Oh, great.

Why?

Oh, great.

I'm changing, and you don't have any money.

Oh, great.

This is sweet.

Oh, great.

It was my mom's.

Oh, great.

Won't she miss it?

Oh, great.

She died before I was born.

Oh, great.

I think that's impossible.

Oh, great.

She died exactly when i was born, to the minute.

Oh, great.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Oh, great.

You can turn around now.

Oh, great.

What's this?

Did some rich guy give it to you?

What's this?

No.

What's this?

Oh, did your mom give it to you

what's this?

To remember her by?

What's this?

No. I stole it.

What's this?

Oh.

What's this?

Too bad it's empty.

What's this?

Too bad you don't have a guy for it--

what's this?

A guy with a house, a job, a car,

what's this?

Credit cards.

What's this?

And a son.

What's this?

What you're doing is not going to work.

What's this?

What am I doing?

What's this?

You want me to date your dad.

What's this?

No, I don't.

What's this?

I want you to marry my dad.

What's this?

Let me explain.

I never mix business with pleasure.

Let me explain.

I'm not talking about pleasure.

Let me explain.

I'm talking about marriage.

Let me explain.

But people like your dad

let me explain.

Don't marry women like me.

Let me explain.

I told him what you did,

let me explain.

And he didn't mind.

Let me explain.

I told the truth.

Let me explain.

Really?

Let me explain.

I think the truth gets you in trouble.

Know what you should do?

Find your dad a nice woman from town.

Know what you should do?

They don't understand him.

Know what you should do?

I don't understand him!

Know what you should do?

He spends all his time

know what you should do?

Wading around cataloguing plants.

Know what you should do?

Well, good night.

Use the can if you need anything.

Well, good night.

The can?

Well, good night.

Looks like a boob.

Hello, v?

V?

Hello, v?

V, this is Frank.

In the can.

V, this is Frank.

This is v!

My dad thinks you look like grace Kelly.

Good night.

My dad thinks you look like grace Kelly.

Good night, Frank.

Frank: I'm telling you,

she slept in the tree house!

Frank: I'm telling you,

you're full of shit.

Frank: I'm telling you,

a "c"! My dad will kill me.

Frank: I'm telling you,

what's wrong with a "c"?

Frank: I'm telling you,

her car broke down. She's there now!

Frank: I'm telling you,

she's going to tell!

Frank: I'm telling you,

she's not there.

Frank: I'm telling you,

I'll bet a zillion dollars.

Frank: I'm telling you,

name your price.

Frank: I'm telling you,

your leather jacket.

Frank: I'm telling you,

oh, thank God! A "d"!

What?

Oh, thank God! A "d"!

No, I'd rather bet a zillion dollars.

Oh, thank God! A "d"!

Look, if she's not there,

oh, thank God! A "d"!

I'll be your slave for life!

Oh, thank God! A "d"!

These are excellent terms, Brad.

Oh, thank God! A "d"!

You're toast.

Oh, thank God! A "d"!

Oh, no!

Ha, ha! He got an "f"!

Oh, no!

Your understanding

of the female reproductive cycle

your understanding

is simply not satisfactory.

Your understanding

I'm giving you a second chance,

your understanding

by assigning an oral presentation.

Your understanding

oral, as in from the mouth?

Your understanding

that's exactly right.

Your understanding

an oral presentation on the material,

your understanding

with visual aids,

your understanding

due by the end of the week.

Your understanding

what kind of visual aids?

TV reporter: Well, trash day

what kind of visual aids?

In the red-light district took on new meaning

what kind of visual aids?

As one local resident made a grisly discovery.

What kind of visual aids?

He found among the trash cans

what kind of visual aids?

The dead body of an unidentified white male.

What kind of visual aids?

The body, when examined by paramedics,

what kind of visual aids?

Showed signs of what police are calling

what kind of visual aids?

"Ritualistic mutilation."

What kind of visual aids?

Oh, my God!

What kind of visual aids?

Oh, my God!

What kind of visual aids?

Authorities wouldn't elaborate on the mutilation

what kind of visual aids?

Or release the victim's name,

what kind of visual aids?

But speculation is that the killing was related

what kind of visual aids?

To drugs and prostitution.

What kind of visual aids?

Importer and reputed mob boss Jerry the pope

what kind of visual aids?

Denied allegations that moneys

what kind of visual aids?

From local prostitution operations

what kind of visual aids?

Were being funneled through his corporation.

What kind of visual aids?

( Ring )

What kind of visual aids?

Hello?

Betty, I'm watching the news. What happened?

Hello?

Um.

Hello?

Cash stole from waltzer,

hello?

So waltzer cut his heart out.

Hello?

I guess he wasn't a person after all.

V.

I guess he wasn't a person after all.

Cash said that you took the money.

I guess he wasn't a person after all.

That's not true.

I-i believe you,

but, um,

i-i believe you,

you got to tell waltzer in person.

I-i believe you,

( mouthing )

I-i believe you,

um,

tell me where you are.

Um,

I'll come to you.

Um,

v?

Oh, shit.

Got to get out of here. Okay.

( Car doesn't start )

Oh!

( Car doesn't start )

Excuse me!

Sorry. Excuse me.

Excuse me!

Thank you.

Excuse me!

Who do I need to find? What am I doing?

Excuse me!

Dad, dad. Find dad.

Excuse me!

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

Uh, he's a teacher here.

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

Oh! What's the goddamn name?

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

His name is, um.

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

Tom.

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

Tom. That's his name.

Um, excuse me. I'm looking for Frank's father.

Student: Hey, tom, over here!

Tom: Now feel the edges.

That's one way to tell. Sedges have edges!

Tom: Now feel the edges.

If you look at this soil under a microscope,

tom: Now feel the edges.

You could see thousands of years of evolution!

Tom: Now feel the edges.

Thanks, Mr. Wheeler.

Tom: Now feel the edges.

You're welcome, Nate.

Tom: Now feel the edges.

Mr. Wheeler, is this toadflax?

Tom: Now feel the edges.

No, that's impatiens capensis, or touch-me-not.

Tom: Now feel the edges.

Guys! I found a touch-me-not!

Tom: Now feel the edges.

Untouched, here in the middle

tom: Now feel the edges.

Of suburban uniformity, you can find.

Tom: Now feel the edges.

A tiny wilderness.

Dad! Hey, dad! Whoa!

I need to talk to you for a second.

Student: He has a daughter?

I need to talk to you for a second.

You have to fix my car.

I need to talk to you for a second.

I planned to, after school.

I need to talk to you for a second.

I can't wait that long.

I need to talk to you for a second.

I need to leave town, right now.

I need to talk to you for a second.

Lady, we all do!

I need to talk to you for a second.

Are you late for an appointment with a client?

I need to talk to you for a second.

Are you a religious fanatic or something?

No. Why?

Because you're just the most

understanding man I've ever met.

Because you're just the most

thank you.

Because you're just the most

wow, look at this place.

What is this?

Wow, look at this place.

This is the tanahpaya wetlands--

wow, look at this place.

What's left of it.

Wow, look at this place.

This is the place that you're trying to save.

Wow, look at this place.

Oh, it's so beautiful.

Wow, look at this place.

Tom: You think so?

Wow, look at this place.

V: Yeah.

Wow, look at this place.

Why would anybody want to ruin this?

Wow, look at this place.

Well.

Wow, look at this place.

Look!

Wow, look at this place.

Both: A glossy ibis!

Wow, look at this place.

I watch a lot of documentaries on TV.

You know, maybe i don't have to leave.

I mean, it's so safe here.

Nobody knows about this place

I mean, it's so safe here.

Except you.

I mean, it's so safe here.

And me.

I mean, it's so safe here.

Just you.

And me.

Just you.

And the 20 of us.

Just you.

( Laughter )

Just you.

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

Okay.

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

Can you manage on foot?

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

Yeah. I have this.

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

I have this old bike here.

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

Hey, hey! That's my bike!

I-i could fix your car at 4:00.

Oh! Ha, ha!

Bye.

It's her car.

It's her car! Oh!

It's her car.

What are you doing?

I'm taking a bath.

What are you doing?

Why?

Because my boss had his heart ripped out.

Why?

Some bad people are after me, so I'm staying.

Why?

I've seen the Brady bunch.

Why?

Nothing bad happens to you people.

Why?

I told you.

Why?

She'll tell our parents!

Why?

If my dad finds out, I'm dead!

Why?

She's not going to tell!

Why?

She's going to marry my dad.

Why?

Marry her? Marry her? He can't marry her!

Why?

No one can marry her!

Why?

When people marry, they tell everything!

Why?

She'll tell. They all tell!

Why?

Kevin! Listen to me.

Why?

If she tells, we'll say it's Frank.

Why?

Fine.

Why?

Brad!

You're wearing my jacket.

Brad!

I thought we bet a zillion dollars.

We need to get a few things straight.

Dad isn't home. Relax.

We need to get a few things straight.

You can stay in my tree fort

we need to get a few things straight.

And play in the house when dad's at work.

We need to get a few things straight.

No smoking, no swearing,

we need to get a few things straight.

And no letting dad know you're staying here.

We need to get a few things straight.

And don't take your clothes off for money.

We need to get a few things straight.

Ha, ha, ha! Anything else?

We need to get a few things straight.

Yeah.

I need some help with my homework.

Yeah.

What's the subject?

Yeah.

How long do you want me to wait?

Yeah.

Till you're more mature.

Yeah.

A sexual relationship

yeah.

Is a very precious thing.

Yeah.

I was talking about dinner. It's getting cold.

Yeah.

Oh.

Yeah.

I knew that.

Yeah.

Ready?

Yeah.

Ready?

Both: Ready, set, go.

Ready?

Ah, beat you!

Ha, ha, ha!

Who was a faster eater, you or mom?

We never raced.

What kind of microwave dinners did she like?

We cooked real food.

What kind of microwave dinners did she like?

Do you miss real food?

What kind of microwave dinners did she like?

I've never eaten it.

What kind of microwave dinners did she like?

( Bell rings )

All right, everybody! Sit down.

Okay, come on.

All right, everybody! Sit down.

Let's get started. Time!

All right, everybody! Sit down.

Sit down.

All right, everybody! Sit down.

Ohh!

Look at that!

Ohh!

Brad: Look! Do you believe it?

Ohh!

He's wearing the jacket!

Ohh!

Frank, are you ready to begin your report?

Ohh!

No, not yet.

( Ring )

No, not yet.

Owen meany junior high.

Just a moment.

Owen meany junior high.

Mrs. fetch,

please report to the office.

Mrs. fetch,

you have a phone call.

Mrs. fetch,

uh, Frank, don't do anything until I get back.

Mrs. fetch,

of course!

Mrs. fetch,

let's get started.

On what?

Let's get started.

Get started on what?

Let's get started.

He looks so cool.

What is he doing?

What's he doing?

What is he doing?

Hello.

Aaah!

Hello.

Hello?

Hello.

The line is dead.

This is a woman.

The line is dead.

( Cheers and whistles )

The line is dead.

These are her breasts.

The line is dead.

( Cheers and giggling )

The line is dead.

They serve an important biological function

the line is dead.

In child-rearing,

the line is dead.

As both a food source.

The line is dead.

And headrest.

The line is dead.

( Cheers and laughter )

The line is dead.

Size and shape of breasts may vary

the line is dead.

From person to person,

the line is dead.

But number is constant-- one, two.

The line is dead.

Whoo!

The line is dead.

Please.

( Gasp )

Mrs. fetch: Children! Children!

Who wants to go on?

Mrs. fetch: Children! Children!

Children, unlock this door!

Mrs. fetch: Children! Children!

I didn't want to do this. It's the assignment.

Mrs. fetch: Children! Children!

These.

Mrs. fetch: Children! Children!

Are the ovaries.

Oh! Oh.

Oh!

Oh! Oh.

That's where the eggs are.

Oh! Oh.

Eggs, eggs, eggs, eggs, eggs,

oh! Oh.

Eggs, eggs, eggs, eggs.

Oh! Oh.

Each ovary is connected to a fallopian tube.

Oh! Oh.

Mrs. fetch: Frank!

Oh! Oh.

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Mrs. fetch: Open this door now!

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Leading to the uterus, that fist-sized baby motel,

uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Which is roughly here.

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

What?

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Tickles.

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Sorry. Wait. Where was I?

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Uterus.

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Excuse me?

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Baby motel!

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Oh, right, which brings us to.

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Intercourse!

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

Whoaah!

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

May I have a volunteer from the class?

Uh, which swings down like a little freeway.

( Applause and cheering )

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

Mmm.

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

Okay, how about this one?

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

This is nice.

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

I don't know.

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

I-i don't think

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

That I should wear her clothes.

Frank: Here's something. What do you think?

V?

Yeah?

V?

Is there a place you can touch

v?

To make a woman completely insane?

V?

Where did you hear that?

A magazine.

Where did you hear that?

Um, well.

Where did you hear that?

Don't count on it.

Okay.

Don't count on it.

How about this one?

Like it?

How about this one?

Know what I like about you?

Every time I think of you, you appear.

Know what I like about you?

Mmm.

Know what I like about you?

If you're not rushing to see a client

no.

If you're not rushing to see a client

not in this dress.

If you're not rushing to see a client

could we have dinner?

Yes. Really?

Could we have dinner?

Yes. Yes!

Could we have dinner?

Okay.

I'm just going to change.

Okay.

Vicky? No.

Okay.

Valerie?

Okay.

Virginia?

Okay.

No.

Okay.

West Virginia?

Okay.

Hmm?

He asked me out!

Hmm?

He's changing right now.

Hmm?

I saw.

Hmm?

He's ironing like crazy.

Hmm?

Why are you dolled up?

Hmm?

I'm not!

Hmm?

Are you coming?

Hmm?

Gross! I have my own life, thanks.

Hmm?

Is that cologne you're wearing?

No.

Is that cologne you're wearing?

Are you going on a date?

Is that cologne you're wearing?

No.

Is that cologne you're wearing?

Just practicing being cool,

is that cologne you're wearing?

In case i run into Stacey.

Is that cologne you're wearing?

Oh. Do you have something to give her?

Is that cologne you're wearing?

Is that a rule?

Is that cologne you're wearing?

No, but it should be.

Girls and gifts.

No, but it should be.

Kind of the same word.

No, but it should be.

I can't take this.

No, but it should be.

Why not?

No, but it should be.

I'm not giving this to anyone.

No, but it should be.

I'll keep it with me always.

No, but it should be.

Yeah?

No, but it should be.

Thanks.

No, but it should be.

You're welcome.

No, but it should be.

I never had time to be lonely.

I had Frank,

I never had time to be lonely.

And I buried myself in my work.

I never had time to be lonely.

Other than Frank,

I never had time to be lonely.

The wetlands mean everything to me.

I never had time to be lonely.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

I wonder who that is.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

She's a hooker.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

Oh, honey! Shh.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

I can't believe I'm saying all this.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

Why?

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

I'm normally not like this,

look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

Not at ease with new people.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

No? Neither am I.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

In my line of work, that's a problem.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

How do you deal with it?

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

Well, let's see.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

When I'm with someone new, i pretend like

look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

I'm with someone I love.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

That helps me get through.

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

( Crash )

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

Oh!

Look, honey. It's Frank's dad.

I don't think I've ever met

a more dedicated teacher.

I don't think I've ever met

I don't think anyone's ever

I don't think I've ever met

looked at what i do that way.

I don't think I've ever met

why? Because you don't do it in the classroom?

I don't think I've ever met

you know, you're an amazing man.

Right now,

with me.

Right now,

what?

Right now,

are you pretending?

Right now,

pretending?

Right now,

that you're with someone else,

right now,

someone you love.

Right now,

no. I don't have to pretend with you.

Mmm.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Holly, isn't that your little friend's dad?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yeah. Mother: Who is he with?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

It's his sister.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

I-i feel a, a strong,

no. I don't have to pretend with you.

Almost mammalian pull towards you.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Hey.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

You mean, like how the moon

no. I don't have to pretend with you.

Pulls the tides?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yes.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yes, just like that.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Dad: Don't you mean his sister-in-law?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

No. It's his sister.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

I think that's sweet.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

They must be an affectionate family.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

You two could learn something

no. I don't have to pretend with you.

About how close

no. I don't have to pretend with you.

A brother and sister can be.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

No one's said that before.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Say it again.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

What?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

The mammal word.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Mammalian.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yes, that's it.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

What does that mean?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Mammals are warm-blooded creatures.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Warm?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Very warm.

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yes?

No. I don't have to pretend with you.

Yes.

Very, very warm?

Yes.

There's no way I'm doing that.

Both: We should go.

Um, where?

Well, we're-we're going to be late.

Um, where?

Oh.

Um, where?

We have reservations.

Um, where?

Yeah.

Um, where?

Tom! Judy.

Hank.

Tom! Judy.

Kevin.

Tom! Judy.

V!

Tom! Judy.

You know this woman, son?

Tom! Judy.

Not like we know each other,

tom! Judy.

Mr. Smith.

Tom! Judy.

You, know her, father?

Uh, no! No, no.

You, know her, father?

You must be confusing me with someone else.

You, know her, father?

I may forget names

you, know her, father?

But never a face.

You, know her, father?

My name is v, the letter.

You, know her, father?

Your husband and I

you, know her, father?

Did business together once.

You, know her, father?

Oh! Yes, of course!

You, know her, father?

Business!

You, know her, father?

I'm sorry. Of course.

You, know her, father?

Uh, v is a, um, dance instructor.

You, know her, father?

She taught me to dance.

You, know her, father?

You teach dance and tutor math?

You, know her, father?

Isn't that wonderful?

You, know her, father?

We should all go dancing sometime.

You, know her, father?

Judy: Let's do it soon.

You, know her, father?

V could teach us some things.

You, know her, father?

Uh, she can't!

You, know her, father?

Um, she's retired.

You, know her, father?

It was really nice to see you. Bye.

You, know her, father?

Ha, ha, ha!

You, know her, father?

What--

you, know her, father?

Well, it's a small--

you, know her, father?

V.

V!

V.

( Engine won't start )

V.

Tom: Stop that!

Stop it. What are you doing?

Tom: Stop that!

I thought you fixed it.

Tom: Stop that!

What's wrong with you?

Tom: Stop that!

I thought things were different.

Tom: Stop that!

What happened?

Tom: Stop that!

I don't understand.

Tom: Stop that!

That's why I'm leaving!

Tom: Stop that!

Let me take you.

Tom: Stop that!

Do you know where I live?

Tom: Stop that!

I have no idea.

Tom: Stop that!

Do you want to see it? Follow me.

Tom: Stop that!

Why are we climbing this tree?

May I ask why you're living

in my son's tree house?

May I ask why you're living

take off your pants first.

May I ask why you're living

why do i have to?

May I ask why you're living

men are better listeners

may I ask why you're living

when they're not wearing pants,

may I ask why you're living

and I don't want you

may I ask why you're living

to be able to get away.

May I ask why you're living

fine. I'm taking off my pants.

May I ask why you're living

this better be good.

May I ask why you're living

nobody's treated me like you do.

May I ask why you're living

like how?

May I ask why you're living

like a person.

May I ask why you're living

how do others treat you?

May I ask why you're living

like a hooker.

Why would they do that?

Like a hooker.

Because I am a hooker.

Like a hooker.

What do you mean, exactly?

Frank said he told you.

What do you mean, exactly?

What?

What do you mean, exactly?

I'm a prostitute!

What do you mean, exactly?

Men pay me to have sex with them.

What do you mean, exactly?

Then why are you teaching math?

What do you mean, exactly?

I don't teach math!

What do you mean, exactly?

Frank said you're a tutor!

What do you mean, exactly?

Frank said you didn't care

what do you mean, exactly?

That I'm a hooker.

What do you mean, exactly?

He bought me a hooker?

What do you mean, exactly?

He didn't buy me for you!

What do you mean, exactly?

What a relief!

What do you mean, exactly?

I'm to marry you.

What do you mean, exactly?

You said I looked like grace Kelly.

What do you mean, exactly?

Who said?

What do you mean, exactly?

Frank. He probably lied about that, too.

What do you mean, exactly?

No, he didn't.

What do you mean, exactly?

I-i did say that.

What do you mean, exactly?

I thought you were different and understanding.

That would explain

I thought you were different and understanding.

Why you looked at me that way.

I thought you were different and understanding.

That was because you looked at me that way.

I thought you were different and understanding.

What way?

I thought you were different and understanding.

Like I was somebody.

I thought you were different and understanding.

You are somebody.

I thought you were different and understanding.

We're both somebodies.

I thought you were different and understanding.

How do you open--

I thought you were different and understanding.

I'm an adult-somebody teacher.

I thought you were different and understanding.

You're an adult-somebody hooker

I thought you were different and understanding.

I'm supposed to marry.

I thought you were different and understanding.

You should have told me.

You always say, it's not what you do,

you should have told me.

It's who you are.

You should have told me.

But there's a difference--

you should have told me.

There was no "but."

You should have told me.

I know you're trying to help.

You should have told me.

She's the right woman.

You should have told me.

What's so right about her?

You should have told me.

I took this magazine test,

"are you your mate's perfect woman?"

I took this magazine test,

she scores 98%,

I took this magazine test,

losing one because she's a stranger

I took this magazine test,

and one because your relationship is a lie.

I took this magazine test,

you only lose one?

I took this magazine test,

it says it's unimportant.

I took this magazine test,

what's more important?

I took this magazine test,

if she's a grownup, has a job,

I took this magazine test,

is independent, good with money, funny--

I took this magazine test,

she doesn't swear anymore--

I took this magazine test,

she watches cartoons,

I took this magazine test,

likes ice cream,

I took this magazine test,

and fits into mom's clothes.

I took this magazine test,

I knew that dress looked familiar.

I took this magazine test,

she likes you, dad!

I took this magazine test,

that's the best part.

I took this magazine test,

where did you learn to be like this?

I took this magazine test,

from you.

I took this magazine test,

so,

what does the magazine say?

So,

what should I do?

So,

call her.

So,

on what?

So,

v?

V?

V?

She's not picking up.

V!

She's not picking up.

Ah! Jeez!

V, don't go!

I thought you were my friend, but you're not.

V, don't go!

You're a liar.

V, don't go!

( Door opens )

I want to talk to you.

( Door opens )

Stay away from me.

( Door opens )

I should be angry. I was deceived.

( Door opens )

I am not angry!

( Door opens )

I just want to leave.

( Door opens )

I don't like suburbs.

( Door opens )

Car doesn't work.

( Door opens )

Keep it! It isn't mine.

( Door opens )

( Crying )

( Lid slams )

It's a diaphragm.

It's a locket.

Somebody's empty locket.

It's a locket.

It's kind of sad.

It's a locket.

It's my locket. I gave it to him.

He said he would keep it forever.

It's my locket. I gave it to him.

Ah!

It's a picture of his mom.

Ah!

I didn't even know he had this.

She doesn't look at all like grace Kelly.

Neither do I, for that matter.

She doesn't look at all like grace Kelly.

You do to me.

She doesn't look at all like grace Kelly.

I don't want to have sex with you, you know.

I don't want to have sex with you, either.

Tom: I never really thought

that she looked like grace Kelly.

Tom: I never really thought

it was just a quality that she had,

tom: I never really thought

a feeling.

Tom: I never really thought

it became a game with Frank and me,

tom: I never really thought

who did or didn't have this quality.

Tom: I never really thought

it was so hard for me

tom: I never really thought

to talk about her.

Tom: I never really thought

it was the only way

tom: I never really thought

I could let Frank know about her.

Tom: I never really thought

tell me how you met.

Tom: I never really thought

we knew each other in high school.

Tom: I never really thought

actually, it was junior high school.

Tom: I never really thought

I remember the first time i saw her.

Tom: I never really thought

yeah?

Yeah.

Yeah?

She was leaning on the kitchen counter,

yeah?

Talking on the telephone.

Yeah?

We were at a dance.

A dance.

We were at a dance.

I never went to a dance.

We were at a dance.

Why not?

We were at a dance.

Because I left home when I was 14.

We were at a dance.

Missed my whole life.

We were at a dance.

If I'm the first,

this might hurt a bit.

If I'm the first,

are you trying to be funny?

If I'm the first,

I'm not talking about sex.

If I'm the first,

what are you talking about?

If I'm the first,

I want to make love.

If I'm the first,

Eve. Eve.

Eve is my real name.

Eve. Eve.

I-i changed it

Eve. Eve.

Because it sounded too biblical,

Eve. Eve.

So I took off the es.

Eve. Eve.

This hurts.

( Snoring )

( Thump )

Ow! Ouch. Damn it.

( Thump )

Yes, hello.

Uh, did you have somebody in mind, sir?

Yes, hello.

I have someone in mind. V.

Yes, hello.

V? Uh, we don't know where she is.

Yes, hello.

That's bullshit!

Yes, hello.

That's bullshit.

Yes, hello.

I saw her tonight in middleton.

Yes, hello.

You saw her in middleton?

Yes, hello.

Middleton? What address?

Yes, hello.

Um, he hung up.

Oh, he hung up.

Um, he hung up.

She shouldn't be hard to find.

Um, he hung up.

( Teakettle whistling )

( V giggles )

Both: Good morning, Frank.

Did I miss something?

Both: Good morning, Frank.

V and I have been in the wetlands

both: Good morning, Frank.

Collecting samples since dawn.

Both: Good morning, Frank.

I have to get something

both: Good morning, Frank.

Out of the garbage.

Both: Good morning, Frank.

You looking for this?

I'm sorry I lied,

but you said the truth

I'm sorry I lied,

gets you in trouble.

I'm sorry I lied,

yeah.

I'm sorry I lied,

are you staying?

I'm sorry I lied,

for a while.

I'm sorry I lied,

as my mom?

I'm sorry I lied,

no, not as your mom.

I'm sorry I lied,

well, then, as what?

I'm sorry I lied,

um, as a friend of the family.

I'm sorry I lied,

that'll do.

I'm sorry I lied,

good. Come on.

I'm sorry I lied,

there's just one more thing.

( Music playing )

Now, I want you

( music playing )

To just watch my feet

( music playing )

And listen to the music,

( music playing )

Okay?

( Music playing )

See? Now you try it.

Move your feet.

See? Now you try it.

I said, move your feet, Frank!

See? Now you try it.

I am!

See? Now you try it.

Okay

see? Now you try it.

New deal.

See? Now you try it.

Um.

See? Now you try it.

Don't move your feet, okay?

See? Now you try it.

Just sway your hips from side to side.

See? Now you try it.

No! That's how it all starts.

See? Now you try it.

What?

See? Now you try it.

Sex. I've decided it's an evil scheme.

See? Now you try it.

What can you do?

See? Now you try it.

Something where you touch somebody

see? Now you try it.

And move at the same time.

See? Now you try it.

I can thumb-wrestle.

Okay. That's good. That's a start.

I can thumb-wrestle.

Watch out. I'm pretty good.

I can thumb-wrestle.

One, two, three, four,

I can thumb-wrestle.

Now we start the thumb war.

I can thumb-wrestle.

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

¶ she's a real deceiver ¶

¶ has a history plays tricks ¶

I got you.

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

no, you didn't!

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

got you!

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

¶ made me a true believer ¶

¶ has a history plays tricks ¶

ha, ha, ha!

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

come on.

¶ Has a history plays tricks ¶

yeah!

¶ A true believer ¶

Frank.

¶ A true believer ¶

whoa!

¶ A true believer ¶

Frank!

¶ A true believer ¶

you're dancing.

¶ A true believer ¶

you're dancing, dude.

¶ A true believer ¶

good morning.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Nice day, isn't it?

Good morning.

Sour cream and onion.

Um, popsicles.

Sour cream and onion.

Sure. Pretzels?

Sour cream and onion.

Yeah.

Sour cream and onion.

Oh, fluff.

Sour cream and onion.

Hi. How are you?

Great.

Hi. How are you?

Very good.

Good.

Very good.

Excuse me, ma'am.

Have you seen this woman? It's important.

Excuse me, ma'am.

Take your time. I've got all day.

No, I can't say as I have. Sorry.

Take your time. I've got all day.

I beg your pardon--

mom, can I have the new cosmo, please?

I beg your pardon--

my mom, she's the greatest.

Where are we going?

You're going home.

Where are we going?

I'm getting out of here.

Where are we going?

He didn't even recognize you.

Where are we going?

He doesn't know

where are we going?

My dad can't fix cars.

Where are we going?

I'm not staying, Frank.

Where are we going?

( Drill whirring )

Where are we going?

So this is what it's like.

What do you mean?

So this is what it's like.

To have a mom.

So this is what it's like.

You look cool, Frank.

You look very, very cool.

You look cool, Frank.

Tonight, Stacey will think

you look very cool, too.

Tonight, Stacey will think

v, don't go.

Tonight, Stacey will think

it'll be fun. Come on, keep up.

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

Frank! V!

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

Frank! V!

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

I found out what's wrong with the car!

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

Frank! Frank!

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

V?

( Banging ) Oh, shit!

Frank?

Where is everybody?

Frank?

( Tires squealing )

( Horn honks )

¶ Over the Mountain ¶

¶ across the sea ¶

¶ over the Mountain ¶

¶ there's a girl a-waiting for me ¶

¶ over the Mountain ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ she's passing me ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ blowing loud ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ over the Mountain ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ a girl ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ waits for me ¶

¶ across all the rivers beyond every cloud ¶

¶ there on the sand ¶

¶ every blade of grass ¶

¶ there on the sand ¶

¶ please tell the wind ¶

¶ there on the sand ¶

what happened to you?

¶ There on the sand ¶

I stopped washing completely.

¶ There on the sand ¶

¶ over the Mountain ¶

¶ there on the sand ¶

¶ a girl waits ¶

¶ there on the sand ¶

you smell.

¶ There on the sand ¶

I will no longer be my father's dupe.

¶ There on the sand ¶

you don't look so good yourself. What's up?

¶ There on the sand ¶

lots of things.

¶ There on the sand ¶

and Stacey loves Brad,

¶ there on the sand ¶

which makes me feel like i can't breathe.

¶ There on the sand ¶

it would be different if v were here.

Really?

It would be different if v were here.

You think so, huh?

It would be different if v were here.

What would you do if v were here?

It would be different if v were here.

I'd ask her to dance.

It would be different if v were here.

¶ My love waits ¶

it would be different if v were here.

Prove it.

It would be different if v were here.

¶ For me ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ Into each dark ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ And starry night ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ Oh, what a mystery ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ That's sealed so tight ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ Over the Mountain ¶

it would be different if v were here.

¶ A girl ¶

it would be different if v were here.

Frank, I couldn't leave without saying goodbye.

It would be different if v were here.

Want to dance?

It would be different if v were here.

I thought you didn't know how.

It would be different if v were here.

I don't.

It would be different if v were here.

What do you do here if you can't dance?

It would be different if v were here.

I thumb-wrestle.

It would be different if v were here.

Look, sweetie.

It's your dance instructor.

Look, sweetie.

Oh.

Look, sweetie.

¶ I had a cat named way out Willie ¶

¶ he got a cool little chick named rockin' Millie ¶

¶ I had a cat named way out Willie ¶

oh, yes.

¶ I had a cat named way out Willie ¶

¶ he walks, and he strolls and he Suzie qs ¶

¶ I had a cat named way out Willie ¶

¶ and do that crazy hand jive, too ¶

¶ I had a cat named way out Willie ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ doin' that crazy hand jive ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

she's very good, isn't she?

¶ Hand jive ¶

hmm? Yes, yes.

¶ Hand jive ¶

oh, yes.

¶ Hand jive ¶

¶ "you and that hand jive have got to go" ¶

¶ hand jive ¶

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

he can dance.

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

he can dance really well.

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

¶ hand jive, hand jive ¶

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

she's a math tutor.

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

can she solve multivariable equations?

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

what are the odds of finding another woman

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

with that body and those skills?

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

¶ come on ¶

¶ Willie said "papa, don't you put me down" ¶

¶ my love must be a kind of blind love ¶

here comes my jacket.

¶ My love must be a kind of blind love ¶

I think he likes you.

¶ My love must be a kind of blind love ¶

think he does?

¶ My love must be a kind of blind love ¶

hi. Hi.

¶ My love must be a kind of blind love ¶

hi.

¶ My love must be a kind of blind love ¶

would you like this?

¶ Shoo-bop shoo-bop ¶

¶ shoo-bop shoo-bop ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ Shoo-bop shoo-bop ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ Oh, shoo-bop shoo-bop ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ Are the stars out tonight? ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ Shoo-bop shoo-bop ¶

would you like to dance?

Did I miss something?

Would you like to dance?

¶ I don't know if it's cloudy or bright ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ I only have eyes ¶

would you like to dance?

¶ For you ¶

would you like to dance?

Mine.

Would you like to dance?

( Tires squealing )

Wait right here. Don't move.

Waltzer, what are you going to do?

Wait right here. Don't move.

I'm going to the sock hop--

wait right here. Don't move.

Whatever that is.

Wait right here. Don't move.

I have something important to tell you.

You don't want me to leave?

I have something important to tell you.

Right. I don't want you to leave,

I have something important to tell you.

But there's something else, too.

I have something important to tell you.

You've got nerve--

bringing a slut like this into our school.

You've got nerve--

¶ I don't know if ¶

you've got nerve--

oh!

You've got nerve--

( screaming )

You've got nerve--

you turned my son into a pig.

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

There are children here!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

There are children here!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

I'm happy to see you, v.

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Yeah, it's a real gun.

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Hey!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

I'd ask you to dance,

yeah, but he's a happy pig.

But you got the last geezer in trouble.

Yeah, but he's a happy pig.

You thought you could take my money.

Well, you thought wrong!

You thought you could take my money.

I wouldn't steal from you.

You thought you could take my money.

Whoa! Uh!

You think I'm stupid or something?

No.

You think I'm stupid or something?

Cash steals from me. He hides 250 grand.

You think I'm stupid or something?

I hated cash.

You think I'm stupid or something?

My money pays for your life in the suburbs.

You think I'm stupid or something?

I wouldn't do anything like that.

You think I'm stupid or something?

Give me your best shot.

You think I'm stupid or something?

Ooh! Uh!

You think I'm stupid or something?

Now, here's the best part.

Are you listening?

Now, here's the best part.

One, I kill cash. I kill you.

Now, here's the best part.

I get my money.

Now, here's the best part.

I love happy endings.

Now, here's the best part.

Money in the car?

Now, here's the best part.

"Money in the--"

now, here's the best part.

It's still there.

Now, here's the best part.

( Alarm ringing )

( All screaming )

( Alarm ringing )

Come on! Come on!

Mister, i know a shortcut!

Come on! Come on!

Waltzer: I don't like fire.

Come on! Come on!

Come on! This way! Over here!

Come on! Come on!

Thanks, Sonny Jim.

Come on! Come on!

Oh, my God. It's a closet.

Come on! Come on!

Yes!

Come on! Come on!

I don't like closets! Oh, it's dark in here!

Come on! Come on!

Uh! Uh!

Uh! Uh!

Uh! Uh!

Come on!

Uh! Uh!

( Horn honks )

Uh! Uh!

There it is! Go!

Little bastards!

Who's driving?

Little bastards!

Whoa! Whoa! Frank.

Little bastards!

Frank, you let me drive.

Little bastards!

Let's go!

Little bastards!

Yes!

There's no bloody fire!

Yes!

Get out of the bloody way!

Yes!

Get out! Come on!

Get out of the bloody way!

Get out! Come on!

( Whistling )

Get out! Come on!

What the bloody hell happened, huh?

Get out! Come on!

Well, some very small person took the car,

get out! Come on!

But I broke a nail, which is--

get out! Come on!

I'll break your bloody neck!

Get out! Come on!

Get in there!

Get out! Come on!

You're not worth the price of a bullet.

Get out! Come on!

Oh, yes, I am.

Get out! Come on!

Oh, no, you're not.

Get out! Come on!

Oh, yes, I am.

Get out! Come on!

( Tires squeal )

Get out! Come on!

You're not. Am too.

Get out! Come on!

Not. Am too.

Get out! Come on!

Shut up! You're not!

Get out! Come on!

V: Slower!

I can't reach the pedals and steer.

V: Slower!

I've got some major cruise control.

V: Slower!

I'll do the pedals.

V: Slower!

Good idea.

V: Slower!

No! Let me drive!

V: Slower!

You can't drive from there!

V: Slower!

Look out!

V: Slower!

Aah!

V: Slower!

( Horns honk )

V: Slower!

Oh! Oh! The sidewalk!

Sidewalk?

Oh! Oh! The sidewalk!

Oh, people!

( Screaming )

Oh, people!

( Horn honks )

That was part of the car!

( Horn honks )

Brake! Brake! Gas!

( Horn honks )

( Horn honks )

( Horn honks )

Aah! Brake!

( Horn honks )

Gas! Gas! He's coming!

( Horn honks )

( Horn honking )

( Horn honks )

Aah! Oh, my God! Jesus!

( Horn honks )

Aah!

( Horn honks )

It's the pimp mobile!

( Horn honks )

Gas! Gas!

( Horn honks )

( Screaming )

( Horn honks )

All right! I see it!

Aah!

All right! I see it!

Wait! Left! Left!

Um, um, um, um--

wait! Left! Left!

Right! Left!

Wait! Left! Left!

Whoa!

Uh, that thing on the car is gone.

Whoa!

Do we need it?

Whoa!

Let me drive!

You broke the car!

Go right!

You broke the car!

( Engine revs )

You broke the car!

You lost the steering wheel?

You broke the car!

Who's smoking?

You broke the car!

It's the car!

You broke the car!

( Horns honk )

You broke the car!

( All screaming )

You broke the car!

That mad friggin' tart!

( Ding ding )

That mad friggin' tart!

Sounds like a train.

That mad friggin' tart!

It is a train!

That mad friggin' tart!

Well, what's it doing?

That mad friggin' tart!

( Ding ding )

That mad friggin' tart!

Oh, nothing.

That mad friggin' tart!

Oh, my God!

That mad friggin' tart!

Brad, we'll never make it!

That mad friggin' tart!

No, Brad, go! Go! We'll make it! Faster!

That mad friggin' tart!

Brake!

That mad friggin' tart!

Make up your minds!

That mad friggin' tart!

( Horn honking )

That mad friggin' tart!

Aah!

That mad friggin' tart!

All right!

That mad friggin' tart!

Brake!

Gas!

Brake!

My God!

Did we make it? What happened?

Fire!

Did we make it? What happened?

It's a fire! Get out!

Did we make it? What happened?

Get out!

Did we make it? What happened?

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

You could have killed me!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Jesus!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

She's going to blow!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Get out!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Go! Go!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Get away! Get out!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Help get him out!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

Get him out!

Betty: Ow! You big jerk!

They're children, you big dope!

Uh!

They're children, you big dope!

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

( Sirens )

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

When I find her,

oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

I'm going to rip her face off!

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Get in the car! Shut up!

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Just get in there.

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Oh, she's gone. She's gone.

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Oh, shut up!

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Cork your bloody beak.

Oh, God, they blew up my bloody money!

Frank!

Dad! Dad!

Frank!

Oh!

Frank!

Are you okay?

Yeah. We blew up the car.

Are you okay?

Open her up!

Are you okay?

You boys all right?

Are you okay?

( Both ) Yeah.

Are you okay?

Was v with you?

Are you okay?

She was with us.

Are you okay?

Did she get out?

Are you okay?

Yeah, she got out.

Are you okay?

Well, where is she? Where is she?

Are you okay?

Dad! Dad, she's gone.

Are you okay?

She's gone, dad.

( Police radio )

She's gone, dad.

( Doorbell rings )

This way.

Thank you.

This way.

I want out.

You'd be taking money out of my pocket.

Waltzer's taking out

you'd be taking money out of my pocket.

A lot more than i ever put in.

You'd be taking money out of my pocket.

I'm saving you a fortune, Jerry.

You'd be taking money out of my pocket.

I mean, let me go, please.

You'd be taking money out of my pocket.

Goodbye, my child.

Thank you.

Goodbye, my child.

Um, what about waltzer?

After today,

um, what about waltzer?

Waltzer doesn't exist anymore.

Um, what about waltzer?

Oh, my God.

Oh, my God!

Ha, ha, ha!

( Siren )

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

My dad's in therapy, Mr. Wheeler. Thanks.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

Dad, please, you lost.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

You've been here for two days.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

The paper didn't even show up.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

If you unchain yourself,

nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

Nobody's pressing charges.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

Please, dad.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

If we unchain you, you're going to jail.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

When this place goes,

nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

Part of me goes with it

nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

A part of all of us.

Nice chains, Mr. Wheeler.

I'll go to jail.

Okay, we're ready to go.

Tom, you're under arrest.

Okay, we're ready to go.

Dad!

Okay, we're ready to go.

You have the right to remain silent.

Okay, we're ready to go.

Anything you say will be used against you.

Okay, we're ready to go.

If you cannot afford one,

an attorney will be appointed.

If you cannot afford one,

do you understand?

If you cannot afford one,

forget it, Charlie.

If you cannot afford one,

he's got the right

if you cannot afford one,

to do any damn thing he pleases.

If you cannot afford one,

what's going on here?

If you cannot afford one,

what is that?

A deed.

What is that?

It's the deed to the wetlands in my name.

Wha--

it's the deed to the wetlands in my name.

Somebody bought the tanahpaya wetlands

it's the deed to the wetlands in my name.

In my name.

It's the deed to the wetlands in my name.

Who did this?

It's the deed to the wetlands in my name.

She did it.

V!

Oh, v!

V!

Mmm.

V!

Tom, I'm happy for you.

V!

All right, boys, let's go home.

V!

Does this mean you're staying?

Come on. I'll have to talk to your dad.

Does this mean you're staying?

Wow!

This is so cool.

Wow!

Well, you guys take care of yourselves.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, you guys take care of yourselves.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, you guys take care of yourselves.

You should have spent your money on yourself.

I did. I bought a few things.

You should have spent your money on yourself.

This is for you and me.

You should have spent your money on yourself.

The glossy ibis has to have a home.

You should have spent your money on yourself.

Thanks.

You should have spent your money on yourself.

Tell me I'm worth waiting for.

You're worth much more than that.

Tell me I'm worth waiting for.

Ha, ha, ha!

( Car starts )

Ha, ha, ha!

Well, where are you going?

How will we find you?

Well, where are you going?

Um, you know that ice cream parlor?

Well, where are you going?

Yeah.

Well, where are you going?

You know, the one where you first kissed me?

Well, where are you going?

Yeah.

Well, where are you going?

I bought it.

Well, where are you going?

You're staying here?

Uh-huh. Here?

You're staying here?

You know what?

You're staying here?

There is a place you can touch a woman

you're staying here?

That'll drive her crazy.

You're staying here?

Where?

You're staying here?

Her heart.

( Engine starts )

See ya.

I have a hair.

Ha, ha, ha!

I have a hair.

I have a hair!

¶ This heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart had love overflowin' ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart was reawakened when you came along ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart was born feet runnin' ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart saw your porch light on ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart hit the sidewalk ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ wonderin' why you left it on ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ was stuck out in a blizzard in its summer clothes ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart knows when love comes ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ and when it goes ¶

¶ this heart was almost taken ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart's gonna let it go ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ 'cause this heart knows the bells she's hearin' ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ aren't the telephone ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart has heard your laughter ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart has learned how to smile ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart will be your true believer ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ if you stay awhile ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ was stuck out in a blizzard in its summer clothes ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart knows when love comes ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ and when it goes ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart this heart, this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart this heart, this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ was stuck out in a blizzard in its summer clothes ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ this heart knows when love comes ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ and when it goes ¶

¶ this heart was stranded in the winter ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart's gonna let it go ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ 'cause this heart knows the bells she's hearin' ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ aren't the telephone ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart has heard your laughter ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart has learned how to smile ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart will be your true believer ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ if you stay awhile ¶

¶ this heart hears the telephone ringin' ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart this heart, this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶

¶ this heart, this heart this heart ¶