All language subtitles for Cults and Extreme Belief S01E01 NXIVM 1080p Amazon WEB-DL DD+ 2.0 x264-TrollHD

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Original subtitles

Slaves, masters, and a secret sex cult--

and now, a federal indictment.

A&E investigates NXIVM

[music playing]

SARAH EDMONDSON: I don't think people can imagine

what it's like to have your skin seared open for 40

or 45 minutes.

There's me and me brand, front page of "The New York Times."

Keith Raniere, the founder of NXIVM,

is accused of coercing women into being sex slaves.

He's now facing federal charges,

including sex trafficking.

We were all pawns for him in his sick, perverted fantasy,

especially women.

What would you say to Keith if you had the chance

to say anything to him now?

I would say that he messed with the wrong person.

[music playing]

MARK VICENTE: Let's go sit over there.

Here at the table spot.

It's a good place.

Yeah. Water?

- Yes, please. - [inaudible]

MARK VICENTE: Yeah.

So I was looking through the Facebook page.

Check this out.

So this was 2013 Michelle, in.

SARAH EDMONDSON: Still in.

Left.

Left. In.

In.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I was in NXIVM for 12 years,

and I left six months ago.

Until recently, my primary social group was NXIVM.

My husband started NXIVM a few years before I did.

And when he and I met, we were friends for a few years

before we started dating.

MARK VICENTE: And this was the happiest people

because, for a moment, they forgot they were in a cult.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I was born and raised and spent

my entire childhood and most of my teenage life in Vancouver.

My parents were former hippies, Then my mom became a therapist.

My dad's a counselor.

Self-help, and therapy, and introspection,

and self-awareness was a big part of my life

since as long as I can remember.

I was very much a seeker from a young age.

[music playing]

It didn't feel like I was having the impact that I was hoping

that I'd gain from acting.

And that's when I met Mark Vicente.

He and I connected immediately.

MARK VICENTE: So Sarah and I met on a cruise ship.

I think it was 2004, 2005.

I was a judge at a film festival at sea.

SARAH EDMONDSON: We just chatted all night.

And by the end of the week, he had told us about the smartest

man in the world that lived in upstate New York

and this group people that were really changing things.

I don't even remember the specifics of it.

I just knew that I wanted to be a part of it,

and I wanted to work with Mark.

He thought I would've really loved the NXIVM

five-day course, and it just so happened

that there was a five-day workshop in Vancouver

a few weeks after that.

I put my deposit down to take the course,

and I paid over $2000.

NXIVM says that it's a self-help group.

It's a set of tools or an educational system

to help people evolve their limiting beliefs,

and to understand themselves better,

and take everything to the next level.

[music playing]

The goal is to help people relieve themselves

of the patterns and the issues they've

had their whole life to be a more

optimal version of themselves.

It's a workshop that, when you do this right,

an issue you've had for your entire life will be gone.

The first class is a class called rules and rituals.

We call it that because these are the rituals

that we use in our program.

For example, we take our shoes off at the door.

We call Keith Raniere vanguard because a vanguard

means it's a leader of a philosophical movement.

There is a ranking system similar to martial arts

using sashes.

And all of it's been preempted with--

there is going to be things that happen in this module that will

make you uncomfortable, and you will feel the urge to bolt.

And that's totally normal.

And when you feel that, just speak to any of the coaches.

Put your hand up.

We're happy to help you.

It means that you're doing it right.

How long did it take you to suspend your skepticism

and say, OK, you know?

Day three-- day three of the five.

The first three days of my five-day,

I was very closed and very, very skeptical.

And then by the third day, I had enough shifts,

basically from doing therapy for 14-hours a day for three days.

And I felt very differently.

And I was like, OK.

This is great.

I'm in.

The night of the third day, I had a huge shift,

and I thought it was amazing.

And every time I took a training, I felt better.

And I felt more options in my life,

and I started to breakthrough limitations in my career.

My close friends saw me, and they

would see a difference in me.

And they, whatever you're doing, what is that?

I want to do that.

And I remember feeling like I had

been given a book of secrets.

And then in 2009, Mark Vicente and I became business partners,

and we actually opened a physical center

here in Vancouver.

We were incredibly successful, bustling, great energy.

At the highest, we had over 240, I believe, full-time students.

People would come in.

They'd see my presentation.

They're like, I don't even know this is.

But I love the people here, and I want to be a part of this.

And it was amazing.

I brought so many people into NXIVM.

And at the time, I thought I was inviting them to something

that was really helpful.

[music playing]

Keith did this big enrollment push and was like,

we need to create an enrollment culture--

and started recruiting, recruiting, recruiting.

I had a huge network.

I was a natural promoter.

And I was signing people up and sharing my success,

and I felt really on fire.

MARK VICENTE: Check this out.

So, I took a lot of photographs with Keith Raniere.

I was always trying to make him look better.

You know, I was always trying to make him look like--

More normal?

MARK VICENTE: Yeah.

SARAH EDMONDSON: This is part of his mannerisms.

[music playing] - Yeah.

What does this mean?

It means to come close to me, feel comfortable with me.

Yeah. I'm harmless.

I'm harmless.

You can trust me.

I'm not a sociopath.

I won't molest you.

KEITH RANIERE: And when you run a personal development program,

our main emphasis, our main belief

is to have people experience more joy in their lives.

And from that, all sorts of interesting effects

appear to happen.

SARAH EDMONDSON: Keith is the leader of NXIVM.

He's the philosophical founder.

We were told that Keith is a genius with an IQ of 240.

He was speaking in full sentences at the age of one.

He was a concert pianist.

He was the east coast judo champion at 11.

He earned degrees in mathematics,

biology, and physics.

Keith is a businessman who created NXIVM in 1998.

Under Keith's leadership, NXIVM has

brought in millions for personal and professional development

programs.

We're a success program.

Richard Branson took our course.

The Dalai Lama is endorsing us.

Allison Mack, who is an actress, is part of NXIVM.

JANJA LALICH: NXIVM has an image of very happy, good looking,

successful people--

and especially women.

This is very important to create that image

because it's a very powerful tool for recruiting.

SARAH EDMONDSON: When I first met [inaudible]

I just turned 28, and I was definitely

looking forward to meeting him.

He was the founder of NXIVM, solving

the world's biggest problems.

He was this selfless humanitarian.

MARK VICENTE: When you're someone like me that values

intelligence and you're told this

is the smartest man in the world,

highest IQ ever scored, you got me.

Because of everything I was told and the things he would say,

I elevated him in my mind to somebody who really

understood the human condition.

I was the person responsible for creating

those videos that are online.

When I looked back at them recently, I was thinking,

what is he saying?

He's not saying anything.

We have sterling credentials that we have

no credentials in the field.

See, credentials seem to be self-limiting in the field.

He did some things with me that were really interesting.

I'll give you an example.

I was sent a video from one of my Mexican contacts

who was a civil rights guy of four women being

decapitated by the cartel.

So I told Keith Raniere about the video, and he said, well,

can I see it?

I go, I don't want to show anybody.

It's the worst thing I've ever seen.

He says, no, I can handle it.

So I give him the video.

A couple of days later, he calls me.

And he says, I've watched it, and I'd like

to talk to you about it a bit.

And he starts talking to me about all

the different perspectives of the players

in this video of decapitation--

the old woman, the younger girl, the kid

who can't cut the head off properly,

the other one who is giving the orders.

And he says, what's it like for that one?

What's it like for this one?

What's it like for this one?

And it always struck me--

how does he do that?

How does he not have these terrible reactions I do?

How is he so evolved?

ELIZABETH VARGAS: What was the charisma?

Because I haven't watched all the videos on YouTube

and I've seen all the, you know--

the films of him speaking on stage.

I don't get it, Sarah.

I just--

SARAH EDMONDSON: I think because you're watching it

from the perspective of you already think he's, you know,

a narcissistic, sex ringleader.

And you're going, yeah, I can see it.

When I met him, I didn't have any of that in my head.

I had him in this other elevated status.

But is there something that's not

communicating or translating across through the TV screen?

Yes. Yes.

Yes, I do think so.

It is the whole foundation where, everyday, we're going,

thank you, Vanguard.

And, like, this curriculum is so amazing.

And it's all because of Keith.

So you have a lot of people saying thank you

and revering him before you even meet him.

By the time you meet him, he's good at getting in rapport

and connecting, you know, eye-to-eye.

And you feel--

What does he do?

Does he get close to you?

Stare into your eyes?

Does he touch your arm while he's talking?

You're not gonna like this answer?

What?

He kisses everyone on the lips.

Ew, really?

I want to say, like, something was off,

but it was countered by all the good things in NXIVM.

And I couldn't quite reconcile it.

In retrospect, Keith doesn't care about humanity and ethics.

We were all pawns for him in his little chess

game, especially women.

usic playing]

Now that I go back and I look at these pictures--

like this picture of everybody sitting

watching Keith enthralled--

I'm like, that's a whole different picture to me.

Like, when I was there--

you guys weren't there that day, were you?

No.

MARK VICENTE: When I was there, I was like, this man knows

[bleep] that nobody knows.

And, you know, he's going to take life to the next level.

And now I'm just like, oh my god, that's so sad.

I started to have suspicions about Keith

and his relationship with the women.

KEITH RANIERE: And as you are is, of course,

the sum of your whole past.

So when someone's being authentic,

you get the feeling that, not only that there's

a person there in the moment, but, somehow, you

reach into their very essence, and you

meet a unique individual.

Hm.

I don't know why that makes me want to cry.

It's beautiful.

I think-- - Well, it's--

Sorry.

Where it got really problematic for me is that some

of the people that Keith was mentoring, like Allison Mack,

began just enrolling all these girls,

pretty, young girls, very consistent-- not the fat ones.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I was in JNESS.

It was an offshoot of NXIVM.

JNESS is a workshop designed for women to help us figure

out who we are at our core.

The JNESS track was $15,000 for three, eight-day trainings--

so, five grand each.

ALLISON MACK: Working for JNESS is

the most satisfying and purposeful

thing I've ever done.

Watching the women who are involved in JNESS completely

transform and evolve in a way that is so pure

is such a privilege.

SARAH EDMONDSON: This is where I think Keith is brilliant

in his-- in my opinion--

sociopathic way that he is telling us we

need to look at our indoctrination.

How we're raised as woman is very different than how

men are raised.

And that indoctrination is disabling for us.

And he's saying, men see women as weak, and we are flaky.

Men say they're going to show up somewhere,

and they show up somewhere.

Women are designed to be monogamous,

and men are designed to be polyamorous.

Men are designed to spread their seed and to populate the world,

and we're designed to be loyal to our man and be subservient.

In the process of understanding our indoctrination,

he is slipping in a new indoctrination.

I actually remember the last training

I took with JNESS because I was like, wow,

I'm not obedient enough.

The cult has to break you down.

They have to reframe your identity in some way

emotionally and psychologically because cults

are about conformity and compliance.

So they have to start taking you apart and then

rebuilding you in their image.

So every cult will do that in some way.

That's part of the indoctrination process.

[music playing]

This is my wedding album.

And in this album is a lot of great pictures of-- let's see.

There's Lauren.

There she is.

Lauren was my maid of honor, and my officiant,

and godmother to our son.

[music playing]

Lauren told me that I'd have to go through an initiation

process to be a part of DOS.

She said, first thing is you make a vow of obedience--

a lifetime commitment to me.

It's like a heightened coach, which she kept repeating

because the next step was understanding that would

be a master-slave relationship.

She's like, not like a real slave

like putting grapes in my mouth, but, like, think guru disciple.

You actually said at one point you thought you were

a bunch of bad-ass bitches.

Yeah, that's how she pitched it to me-- a bad-ass

bitch boot camp, which--

Bad-ass bitch boot camp.

--I will tell you is just incredibly embarrassing.

I agreed to this because now that I'm not drinking

the Kool-Aid, it's so clear to me how she recruited me,

and how she used my values against me,

and how she lied to me.

So we've heard stories of other women who were in DOS

and what they were asked to do to their masters.

Right.

You had to respond within 60 seconds if she texted you.

Mm-hm.

Day or night.

Correct.

What happens if it was 4:00 AM?

You had to respond.

Yup.

And what happened if you didn't?

Well, the first time we didn't and there was a group failure

in responding in a certain time, Lauren

told us that there was going to be big consequences for her

from her master.

And we asked what.

And she said that she was gonna be paddled.

Paddled?

Paddled-- like with a--

JANJA LALICH: Paddle. - With a paddle.

JANJA LALICH: With a paddle.

With, like, an S&M spanking paddle.

And she told us that she was going to be put into a cage.

Oh my god.

And then our group decided that we we're all going to have

the same consequence but worse.

And she had-- I don't know-- three

paddles or something like that, and we were going to 10.

Now, luckily, I didn't have anyone from my little DOS group

in Vancouver with me, otherwise I would have been paddled.

Been paddled?

Yup.

But the other women in California

and in Mexico, they paddled each other, videotaped it--

naked-- and sent it to--

JANJA LALICH: Naked?

--naked, naked paddling-- sent that to Lauren,

who sent it to her master, who now we know is Keith.

Keith.

SARAH EDMONDSON: And my major sticking point

was Lauren told me that I had to agree to an initiation process

where I'd be getting a mark, like a tattoo.

I said, I'm not going to do that because I

don't want to commit to that.

And that's what I told her.

And she's like, but this is your commitment

to your growth, which is never going to change,

and it's going to remind you.

It will be a physical mark of that commitment.

I said, what's it look like?

She's like, I can't tell you.

I said, do you have one?

She says, yeah, it's right here.

I'm like, why can't you show me?

She's like, you can't see it until the night

of your initiation.

I was like, I don't want a tattoo.

And she's like, don't worry.

But I'm trusting her--

like I did with Mark, like I've done

with everyone else in ESP-- that she

knows something that I don't.

I think about a day or two went by before I told her--

sure, I'm in.

She's like, great.

Now we have to collateralize your life

to make sure that you're never going

to speak about it to anybody.

It sounds crazy, and I know to anyone from the outside

would be like, but why would you give collateral?

Collateral started years before in NXIVM as a concept

that people use to help people keep their word.

So, like, I'm going to go to the gym everyday this week,

and if I don't, I'm putting this collateral on the table--

I don't know, $100.

And if I don't go to the gym, I'm going to give

that to my friend Janja--

that kind of thing, very simple.

Then it started to get more painful.

If I don't go to the gym, I'm going

to sleep on the floor for a week or have cold showers

for the month-- yeah.

So in the moment of choosing to go to the gym

or not go to the gym, you go to the gym

because the thought of the pain of the painful thing

that you've committed to would be worse.

The consequence.

The consequence.

The first thing was to ruin my reputation as an actress

is I had to do a nude photo.

So she has one nude photo of me.

I gave her a damaging letter.

My letter said, I, Sarah Edmondson, blah, blah,

blah in my 20s a bunch of indiscretions.

Then I had to do videos.

And in four separate videos, I [bleep]

talked all of the most important members of my family.

[music playing]

So I was in Albany at Allison Mack's house

with a group of women and Lauren Salzman.

And we were told to take off our clothes.

We were shuffled into a tiny, little guest room.

Then we saw a medical table, like a massage table.

The first woman laid down on the table.

I found out I was not getting a tattoo.

I was going to be branded.

So we're all naked with this woman

having her flesh seared open, and she is freaking out.

She's-- she's like-- I remember thinking she

was like a-- like a stuck pig.

We were holding her so she would stay still

or the line would have been jagged.

And she is crying, twisting, and turning.

And I said to Lauren, I don't want to do this.

You told me I was getting a tattoo.

She's like, it's like a tattoo.

It's a brand, and it's so beautiful.

This is what--

I don't want that on my body.

I could have walked out naked into the street

and figured out how to get a cab.

It was not an option for me because she

had all this [bleep] on me.

She had my nude photo.

She had my videos.

She had my written confessional.

And then on top of that, she was using my values against me.

You need to do this because you committed to this,

and this is what you need to be the strongest

version of yourself, and to save your marriage,

and be a good mom.

And I trusted her in that.

The point, they said, of the whole branding

is to do something character building to build your capacity

to experience pain, to experience

your body as separate from your self

so that you could do anything.

And I said, to myself, lay down on the table.

You said you were going to do it.

Suck it up. Don't be a wimp.

Get on the table and just do it.

I lay on the table.

I'm like, I'm can [bleep] do this.

I can [bleep] do it.

And I laid totally still.

I think when people think branding,

they think there's a stamp.

And then there's just going to be a metal thing that

goes like this on your flesh.

And it sears your flesh, and you take it away.

I don't think people can imagine what it's

like to have your skin seared open by a hot cauterizing

iron for 40 or 45 minutes.

It was the most excruciating pain ever,

ever felt in my life.

And then, of course, when I opened my eyes,

there's Lauren looking down at me going,

you're doing so great!

And I'm weeping, and she's weeping.

And everyone's like, oh my god, this is amazing.

And then I go from, before, everything in my body saying

get the [bleep] out of here--

run!

And then going, no, you got to do.

You got to do this because you said you were going to do it.

And that doing it and going, that was amazing!

Oh my god, I can't believe it!

I just overcame the worst pain!

Initially, you had said, after you were branded,

you actually felt proud that you had gone through this.

Yeah, I went through this thing.

It was painful.

It was awful.

I wanted to leave.

Then I stuck it through, and I did feel proud of myself

for not bailing.

By the time you're that far in and you've so internalized

the belief system, you believe that this is what you need

to do in order to reach whatever that level is that they're

promising you and in order to respect, you know,

your revered leader.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I walked around thinking,

I did that even though I didn't want to,

which is the whole thing that Keith has taught us.

As women, if we don't want to do it, we don't do it,

and that's so flaky and indulgent.

And I did it.

I'm feeling love for Lauren and love for these women I

just endured this trauma with.

It put me into a place of pride.

And that was so great, until I realized what the symbol was.

There's this whole description of what all the lines meant.

But, really, it was Keith's initials.

I have [bleep] Keith's initials on my [bleep] crotch.

The first person I told was Mark.

MARK VICENTE: She said to me, it's really bad,

and she started telling me, like, everything.

And I was [bleep] horrified because I was, like, what

the [bleep] are they doing?

And she said, I can't--

I can't leave.

I'm like, what do you mean you can't leave?

And she says, they have all this [bleep] on me.

I was so angry.

They burnt her with his initials.

They did that to somebody I brought in who trusted me.

And then I thought, how many other girls

are in this position?

And I say to Sarah, OK, I'm resigning.

And she starts, like, feeling very emotional and very upset

because it's a huge thing.

We've been business partners and, like, friends for years.

And I told her, you need to get out.

You need to make peace with whatever material

they have on you and whatever [bleep] you've

said that you've recorded.

You need to make peace with it, and you need to get out.

This is dangerous.

And I told her this is [bleep] trafficking.

And then she was saying, Anthony doesn't know.

And I said, you need to tell him.

When I first saw the brand, I wanted to break [bleep]..

I was appalled.

I mean, I was like, how the [bleep] could this happen?

I'm taking my wife and my kid, and I'm getting the [bleep]

out of here.

And you guys might be in criminal trouble.

[music playing]

I needed to wake up to what was actually

going on in this company.

And when I had that recognition of what it was actually

a part of and I stopped drinking the Kool-Aid,

I knew that I had to leave.

Keith really thought that this whole collateral thing would

just stop people from talking.

And it didn't.

And I'm not going to stop talking about it

until Keith is held responsible.

Do you feel like you're on a mission to undo something?

Yes.

That's a-- sorry.

I have to--

I have to undo it as best as I can.

I can't just walk away.

ELIZABETH VARGAS: The night of the branding,

where did that happen?

SARAH EDMONDSON: The actual branding itself

was at Allison Mack's home

ELIZABETH VARGAS: Allison Mack's home.

SARAH EDMONDSON: Mm-hm.

ELIZABETH VARGAS: And there's been a lot said about the fact

that the brand shows Keith Raniere's initials--

KR.

They also show Allison Mack's initials--

AM.

It appears to be that way.

I saw the AM before I saw the KR.

ELIZABETH VARGAS: You did?

SARAH EDMONDSON: I saw the AM first.

When I left, I thought the branding

was the most horrific abuse that was happening in NXIVM.

I actually think that the branding doesn't even

compare to the other emotional abuses that

have been going on for decades.

So once I left, I heard about Keith using sex

as a means to control people.

MARK VICENTE: My knowledge about him sleeping with all the girls

was that there was a few.

I didn't understand that it was dozens, 20, 30--

like, a lot.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I've heard of women--

many women-- signing lifelong vows

to only have sex with Keith.

I don't have a problem, necessarily, with somebody

saying they want to have a swinger lifestyle.

But don't convince a girl that having sex with you

is the thing she needs to do for her own growth.

[music playing]

SARAH EDMONDSON: I don't think it's OK for a man who's

the leader of a philosophical movement to be sleeping

with all of the higher ranks within his company

and his students within the company.

It's a conflict of interest because they're there to learn.

And then you have the person who's

teaching them having sex with them as part of their growth?

If that's what he wants to do, that should

be on their [bleep] web site.

This is the level of growth through sex with the leader.

Keith has been able to continue on with these types of abuses

because nobody talks about it.

So I did an interview with "The New York Times"

to be a whistle-blower.

There is two goals--

educating the world and helping people on the inside

see what they were involved with.

NXIVM is Keith's sick, perverted fantasy

to get people to do what he wants, to bend to his will.

But unfortunately, people inside NXIVM, didn't believe me.

Keith denied everything.

There's no world where Keith didn't know this is going on.

It's impossible.

I think DOS is the culmination of Keith's madness

that he started decades ago.

Keith Raniere denied that he had anything to do with DOS.

Correct.

And yet, the night you were branded, each of you

took turns holding an iPhone--

Lauren's iPhone.

--Lauren's iPhone to videotape to tape the branding.

Yep.

And during the time that you were holding the phone,

Keith texted Lauren.

Keith texted Lauren.

That's when the initial seed was planted of, wow,

this is not what I thought it was.

And so a text came through from KAR,

so then I've confirmed it was Keith

Allen Raniere saying, how are they

all doing with each other--

to Lauren.

And it's because you were holding phone.

SARAH EDMONDSON: I was holding Lauren's phone filming.

ELIZABETH VARGAS: But you see that she happened to catch--

JANJA LALICH: Right, yeah. - Yes

--the fact that he knew full well what was going

on in Allison Mack's townhouse - Yeah, that's interesting.

Yeah.

But when I initially came out and I

wasn't going to say anything, and then

when I did talk about it and tried to share that with people

to try to get them out, they would say, well, how do we know

that the text came from Keith?

Can you duplicate that?

I didn't see it.

It wasn't proof.

You know, this is obviously a crisis

moment for the organization.

And this is a time when a number of people might leave,

but those people who stay become even

more fervent in their beliefs.

But what is that?

JANJA LALICH: That's cognitive dissonance.

It's when reality doesn't meet your belief system.

Nine times out of 10, you're going to retain your thinking

with the belief system rather than

change your reality because that's the safer way to go.

It's just so much easier to just hunker down

and stay with what you know.

[music playing]

SARAH EDMONDSON: I have spent so many years

promoting and recruiting for this group,

and singing his praises, and saying that it's good.

I regret putting my life force behind a sociopathic,

narcissistic, nut-job.

I absolutely feel like I sent people into the lion's den.

I brought so many people into NXIVM.

The people I enrolled and the people they enrolled

is just under or just over 2000 people.

And the more that I hear their stories,

the more I regret being a sales person.

Some of those people aren't even talking to me.

And they were friends of mine from way before this.

I feel especially responsible to make amends with the people

that I got in.

[music playing]

In the entire 12 years that I was NXIVM, the outside world--

also known as the real world--

said that I was in a cult. And we joked about that--

that if we were in a cult, it was

a great cult of happy, successful, joyful people.

And I was totally happy with my cult.

I was originally enrolled into NXIVM because I found this web

site and I saw Sarah Edmondson's face who I knew

and I recognized immediately.

If she's a part of this, I'm in.

I don't have the money, but I will

make room on my credit card.

And I will put all my savings into this because this

could change my life.

[music playing]

SARAH EDMONDSON: Jen Kobelt was a student of mine.

She came to me, and then I enrolled her into an intensive.

And she loved it and wanted to become a coach.

She was somebody that I personally mentored.

I felt very responsible for her.

She's somebody who I feel incredibly

guilty about because I found out after we all left that she was

part of the fright experiment.

JENNIFER KOBELT: One day while I was living in Albany,

my friend at NXIVM comes to me and says, we're doing a study,

and we're looking for 100 participants.

And I've been tasked with bringing them all together.

Would you be a part of it?

And I said, sure, of course.

I didn't know it was an experiment.

Yeah, I don't know.

I'm just-- every time I talk about it, it's just hard.

It's just really hard to talk about.

It's like my whole body is, like, just having

these little tremors because I know where we're going,

and I've lived through all of this.

When it came time, I trusted the doctor in NXIVM administering

it as a doctor and as a friend.

He's got the brain wave machine there and a TV screen set up.

I get the brainwave cap on.

I've got my finger monitor and whatever other little monitors.

And then he said, OK, so I'm going to play you some clips.

And in between, we'll just de-brief your experience.

But at the time, I had no idea what I was going to witness.

I didn't know how much it would affect me.

He presses play.

It wasn't a movie.

This is real life.

Four of the men reach down to the women on their knees.

And they pulled out their machete

and just cut their heads off.

It was so horrific.

They just started cutting them up into pieces.

And he said, how was that experience for you?

And I just sat there.

It was so surreal that at one moment

they were humans, and the next moment they were bodies.

I-- I still think I have some PTSD stuff.

Me too.

I devoted most of my income to this.

And when I first left, I had pretty much nothing.

You weren't treated well.

Not just by the upper ranks, but by me

and by so many people who just [bleep]

on your beautiful, shining spirit.

I'm so sorry.

I regret having people spend money

on a program that systematically destroys their life

and calls it growth.

Doctor, I wanted to get some of your reaction to this.

Why would anybody do an experiment like that?

Well, a cult's goal, or a cult leaders goal,

is to enforce conformity and compliance.

But how do you do that with a snuff film?

By seeing such a horrendous, violent, traumatic video,

they're able to monitor the reaction of the person.

They're hopefully desensitizing the person for further abuse

to come.

So it's a way to measure a person's ability to either move

to the next level or not.

And it's also just sick.

It's really sick.

It's really sick and evil, and it's

a horrendous ethical violation.

I mean, there's rules and regulations

for scientific or medical experiments,

and they violated all of that.

And to blindly put someone into that is just absolute cruelty.

[music playing]

MAN: We're gonna begin, though, tonight with some breaking news

involving NXIVM.

The leader of an alleged sex cult

has been arrested in Mexico.

Keith Raniere is expected --

WOMAN: Investigators found Raniere hiding

in a villa with several women in the popular Mexican resort

town--

WOMAN 2: Keith Raniere, the founder of NXIVM,

is accused of coercing women into being sex slaves.

MAN: He's now facing federal charges,

including sex trafficking.

MAN 2: --collateral for their silence

and even brand themselves with Raniere's initials.

It's alleged--

--and child that he's ever harmed, abused, exploited--

When you first learned about this massive indictment,

what are your emotions?

Do you finally feel vindication?

Do you feel triumph?

Do you feel shock?

Because these are serious charges.

Very serious charges.

I feel all of the things you just said, mostly--

vindicated, yes, but also that justice

is working finally, and after so many years.

But I also feel safer knowing that he's, at least

temporarily, behind bars.

I do feel like I think I'm always going

to be looking over my shoulder.

For what?

Even if he is in jail, there's this concept of flying monkeys

that narcissists have people that do their bidding.

And I've seen how people will follow

whatever order he puts out, and that's frightening to me.

This affidavit, I mean, part of it reads--

some of the masters gave their slaves

assignments that either directly or implicitly

required them to have sex with Raniere, which they then did.

Other assignments appeared designed to groom

slaves sexually for Raniere.

And in another part, Raniere acknowledge to one DOS victim

that his initials were incorporated into the brand

as a form of tribute to him.

It's not what it means to me anymore.

But that's what it was intended for.

Did anything surprise you in here?

I read things in here that I hadn't

heard of for the first time.

ELIZABETH VARGAS: What?

SARAH EDMONDSON: About the woman who was brought into a shack

to have oral sex performed on her while she was blindfolded,

and she didn't know who it was.

I mean, that's disgusting.

What would you say to Keith if you had the chance

to say anything to him now?

I would say that he messed with the wrong person.

And that he, for such a brilliant man,

made a big mistake.

He underestimated you.

He really underestimated me.

And at the same time, part of me still feels badly.

Isn't that bizarre that, like--

he's still a human, you know?

He's still a human who is going to have a rough time,

and I feel badly about that and anyone

who ends up going to jail.

JANJA LALICH: You begin to doubt yourself.

Yeah

For someone who's been in as long as you were,

you still hear that cult in your head every now and then.

And you're free, but you're not free.

And you're happy, but you're devastated.

There's this incredible roller coaster of emotion.

Absolutely.

For me, the indictment is so beyond

validating for my last year of hell that I've gone through.

And it has been hell.

And I've-- sorry.

It has been a very hard fight, but I'm very--

ironically, the most principled thing I've ever

done to stand up against him.

But to see the affidavit and to see that from the FBI

is so vindicating for everything that I fought for.

I've heard through other people within NXIVM,

especially since reading the affidavit from the FBI--

which is public--

that they're starting to ask questions of that the higher

ranks can't answer.

And the web of lies is falling apart.

[music playing]

Allison Mack was recruiting women from here in Brooklyn

to join this so-called empowerment

group in upstate New York before turning them into sex slaves.

WOMAN: She was arraigned in federal court

on charges of sex trafficking and forced labor.

MAN: Now Rainier and Mack could face 15 years to life in prison

if convicted.

SARAH EDMONDSON: The more that I try

to unravel what happened to me and figure myself out

and my life in the last 12 years,

the more I'm just wanting to shout from the rooftops

how important it is to shine a light on this type of abuse,

and this type of group, and how anyone could fall

victim to something like this.

I believe that Keith's arrest is the beginning

of the end for NXIVM.

I've always wanted to have an impact in the world,

and I didn't think it would be like this.

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