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(d Jaunty hornpipe)

Here, take a look at this.

- Isn't that the, er...? - The Maggie.

Coming in as bold as brass. I never thought we'd see HER again in Glasgow.

What's her skipper's name? MacTaggart.

Is he the one that caused all that trouble in the Kyles?

Aye.

Well, they're asking for it this time.

Mr MacGregor, I'm still the master of this vessel. I know what I'm about.

If you had to come to Glasgow, could you not have waited till after dark?

We've nothing to fear from any man or woman.

We'II only be here long enough to find a cargo, then we'II be off again.

If Sarah or anyone is watching for us, they'II be watching by night.

They'd never expect us to have the effrontery to come in by day.

When you've finished the lamps, laddie, grease the wire blocks.

- Aye. - And there's buttons missing on my shirt.

Aye.

Hey!

Hey, you down there!

- Where's Captain MacTaggart? - Pollockshaws, for his mother's funeral.

- He won't be back for a fortnight. - We'II wait.

(Laughter)

Aye, oh, aye.

You're very smug with your gold braid, your pensions and your five days a week,

but you're no better than hirelings, standing like wee bairns

in front of Mr Campbell's big desk down yonder.

You haven't the freedom of operation that I have.

You haven't the dignity of your own command.

And as for my boat, there's not a finer vessel in the coastal trade!

There's not a finer vessel anywhere...

There's two men aboard us, in bowler hats.

- Inspectors. - (Laughter)

Hamish, there's no time for that. Come on.

- Good luck to you, skipper! - You'II be needing it!

(Laughter)

Here, there's seven pence owing.

I've no change. You pay him, lad.

(Raucous laughter)

- You'd better grab him, Dan. - Oh, it's the wee boy that pays.

They haven't got seven pence between them. Come on.

Son, they tell me the truant officer's after you

for going to sea before you finished school.

- It's no' true. I'm over 15. - You can finish your schooling now.

- That old puffer won't put out again. - She will.

It's time MacTaggart was put ashore. He's not fit to manage a rowing boat.

- You'II no' say that about the cap'n. - Captain, him?

(Shouting)

(Boy) Take your hands off me.

Ah! You wait, you big fushionless gomeril. I'II get Hamish to you...

Wee devil! Three months out of school and he's as big a rogue as the rest.

(Laughter)

I'm sorry, MacTaggart. She's done for.

Is it the loading licence?

Aye.

If they take that away, we won't be able to carry any cargo at all.

Aye.

Not until she's had her plates repaired.

Aye.

- Is that what we need the L300 for? - Aye, that's right.

She's finished.

Come on.

- Could we not borrow the money? - Who from?

- We can, er... - Excuse me.

We can offer him a quarter share in the Maggie for L300.

Aye, but what about Sarah?

I could say my sister has a sort of a share in the boat,

that it's a family concern and I'm acting on her behalf.

It's a good idea.

Good morning.

Good morning. We were wanting to speak with Mr Campbell.

Mr Campbell's engaged and he's already Iate for a luncheon appointment.

- If you care to wait... - We cannae afford to wait for long.

Telephone and say I'm on my way.

Mr Campbell, I'm getting through now.

You heard what Captain Jamieson says. The ship won't be ready before tomorrow.

- We've no other vessel available. - Mr Marshall's not going to like this.

- He can be a very impatient man. - I'm afraid I can't do a thing about it!

(Pusey) World International Airways? It's Mr Pusey here.

Put me through to Mr Marshall, please. Yes, I'm phoning from Glasgow...

Mr Campbell, if you can spare us a moment.

(Pusey) The cargo should've gone to Kiltarra. There are architects waiting.

Mr Marshall's anxious to have the house in good repair by his wife's birthday.

I'm sure he would pay the highest rate. Mr Marshall?

It's Pusey here, sir. No, I'm afraid it hasn't.

There's been a further delay, Mr Marshall. It's the shipping agency...

There's a matter of business we would like to discuss with you, sir.

I'm sorry, MacTaggart. I haven't the time. Come back after three.

(Pusey) I've tried everywhere, Mr Marshall.

There just isn't a boat of any description available for charter.

Not before tomorrow night, and even then they can't guarantee.

I know, Mr Marshall, but there just isn't a boat.

If...

If it's a cargo for Kiltarra you have, there's a boat right here.

What?

I don't understand. Excuse me, Mr Mar...

Mr Campbell just this minute... I'm sorry, Mr Marshall. There's some confusion.

Now they say there is a boat. But Mr Ca...

Sir?

The captain?

- Are you the captain? - Yes.

Yes, Mr Marshall. Certainly.

It's Mr Calvin B Marshall, General Overseas Manager of World...

Yes.

Aye?

Captain MacTaggart speaking.

Aye. Aye, we have.

And you want it in Kiltarra by Thursday noon?

Oh, easily, easily.

Insurance?

L4,000?

Oh, we'II see to that, sir.

Aye.

Who?

Mr Marshall, I'm still not quite sure...

'You've been up there three days. Let's get this stuff moving.

'Just make sure it's a sound boat, that's all that matters.

'If you hurry, you can catch the afternoon plane, right?'

- Yes, I think I... - (Hangs up)

Will you tell me why, if a boat is available, Mr Campbell didn't say so?

He put me in a most embarrassing position.

I was just trying to explain to him, sir, that...

- Where is the boat lying? - Couple of hundred yards down the road.

If you don't mind, I think I'II just take a look at it.

(Car draws up)

- Now, where is the...? - This way, sir.

Will you give me an estimate of the charges?

Well... it's difficult... to say exactly.

Maybe...

- Perhaps L300? - Three...?

That does seem rather high.

However, the goods are lying at Customs House dock, berth 17,

checked and crated, ready for shipment.

Mainly plumbing and heating apparatus, some timber, a deep freeze.

A variety of materials, all extremely valuable,

so I've been instructed to make certain that the ship is perfectly sound.

(Pusey) Ah, yes! Well, I see no cause for concern on that score.

Shall we go back to the office?

Better still, we could settle the matter here.

Aye, that's a better idea.

I think, in the circumstances, I can agree to the 300.

If you will just sign the inventory.

In triplicate, please.

Just one thing, I'd like Mr Campbell to phone me tomorrow morning,

so that I can be certain everything got away all right.

Oh, everything will get away all right.

You'II want something on account. I'II give you a cheque for...

Cash would be better, if you can manage it, sir.

I'm afraid I only have about...L50.

That'II do fine, sir.

You can let us have the rest when the job's done.

Well, I'm afraid I must... Goodbye.

Good day to you, sir.

And good luck to you.

Seems to me yon laddie's the victim of a serious misunderstanding.

You did not tell him a thing that wasnae true.

You wouldn't want him to deal with the CSS. The villains would do him down.

- It's a stove. - Aye.

But Hamish, do you see this? Four baths!

AII on the one island.

(Dan) Come on. Outside, the lot of you.

- Come on. - Good evening.

- Time gentlemen, please. - I'II give you a hand.

Oh, here! My concertina.

I'II take that one.

(d Plays a lively tune)

(Engine chugging steadily)

- Captain, sir? - Aye?

- Is it not about low tide? - Aye.

With all this cargo on board, are we no' Iying a bit low in the water?

- Aye. - I mean sir, is it no' a bit...

..dangerous going down this part of the river with the s...?

- What do you know about it? - You're no' the captain yet, laddie.

You're getting far too cheeky. Now, away forward and make us some tea.

(Crash)

Hello? Just a moment.

- Campbell on the line. - Thank you.

Hello, Mr Campbell. I was rather anxious, so I thought I'd phone you.

I trust the cargo got away all right?

What?

The cargo on the boat, of course.

What boat? Well, the boat I chartered yesterday.

You found a boat, then? Well done.

"Found a boat"? This man's quite impossible.

This lad is off his head. Aye?

You made arrangements with whom?

MacTaggart?

It's him there's all the fuss about down in the Broomielaw.

(She laughs)

Mr Campbell, in all my experience, I...

And it's still there?

Well, Mr Pusey, MacTaggart has nothing to do with our organisation.

(AII laughing)

He's master of an old puffer!

The puffer Maggie!

No. Oh, no. That is impossible.

('Campbell laughing')

(Marshall on intercom) 'Send Pusey in.'

('Campbell still laughing')

Hello? Hello?

- And he... gave me his signature. - Well?

- He signed the inventory. - So?

- So, naturally, I chartered the boat. - And...?

They weren't who they said they were.

Campbell says the cargo's not on the boat. It's in Glasgow.

The man you spoke to hasn't a boat, but something called a "puffer".

It's stuck on the Subway, and not even the right boat!

Just let me get one thing straight. You say a boat is stuck on a Subway?

(MacTaggart) I was sailing this river while you were eating saps.

(Man) The Subway lies under the river at this point.

(MacTaggart) The Subway is a menace to navigation.

(Man) You had no right to put out at that state of the tide.

- You may have damaged the Subway. - What about the damage to my ship?

- Captain MacTaggart? - Aye?

I'm from the Evening News. Would you care to make a statement?

You can say that I'm considering bringing an action.

Good for you. What's your destination?

- Kiltarra. - What are you carrying?

A valuable cargo belonging to Mr Calvin B Marshall of World International Airways.

Kiltarra, eh? Tell me, captain, how do you think you'II get her off?

I'II wait for the tide.

Ahoy, Captain Carlson? Are you hanging on?

(Laughter)

Mrs Marshall asked me to remind you that you're giving a dinner party tomorrow.

(Clunk)

(Cheering)

(Horn blows)

(Man) Evening News!

- Evening News! - Let me have one.

Thank you, sir.

Oh, you're here in Glasgow, Mr Pusey?

(Laughs)

Oh, when you were in my office, did you by any chance take my fountain pen?

It doesn't matter. I want to speak to the manager.

- It's about the puffer Maggie. - I don't know I like your tone, Mr Pusey.

But Mr Campbell, I...

But they were in your office, Mr Campbell.

If it isn't the CSS's responsibility, I'd like to know whose it is.

- But that's positively... - Let me talk to him.

Mr Campbell? Calvin B Marshall speaking. Sorry to trouble you.

It seems that we're causing you quite a bit of a...

Yes, I came up to get things straightened out.

Yes, at the Central.

I'd be very much obliged, if you could spare a few moments of your time.

Here? That's very kind of you. Thank you, Mr Campbell.

If you're in a man's office and other people come in and start discussing...

Take it easy, Pusey. There's no need to panic.

It won't help matters to blame Campbell for your mistakes.

If I may say so, Mr Marshall, you spoke to Captain MacTaggart yourself.

Doesn't matter who's to blame. I'II have it straightened out in an hour.

Book us some sleepers on the night train to London.

Hello. Hello, operator?

Even had the effrontery to ask if I'd taken his fountain pen.

My name is Campbell.

- Oh, good evening, Mr Pusey. - Good evening.

- There's a reporter from the News... - Good evening. I want to see Mr Marshall.

- I'm sorry... - There's no need to be sorry.

Tell him Sarah MacTaggart is here. He'II see me soon enough.

How do you do, Mr Campbell?

- You were very kind to give us your help. - Not at all, Mr Marshall.

- Can I offer you a drink? - Oh, I'II have a whisky, thank you.

And a Vichy water for me. Won't you sit down?

(Sarah) Well, you can tell him right now.

It's quite a boat! Is that MacTaggart?

He's a crafty looking old boy, all right. No wonder he was able to...

- (Sarah) The money is owing to me! - Put one over on Pusey.

I don't think a man would need to be very quick to leave Mr Pusey behind.

- This puffer that you hired... - We have not hired a puffer!

It says in the paper that you did. Are your goods aboard her or not?

- No. Yes, but they won't be. - I want to see the owner.

I'II not be put off by underlings.

Put it down.

I don't want to go to the police, but I can tell you one thing right now.

From the look of her and the way MacTaggart navigates,

I want my cargo off that boat. Nothing for me.

If your boat's available from tomorrow morning, we can radio MacTaggart.

You can't. They've no radio.

Who heard of a cargo vessel without a radio?

- Understand, they usually carry coal. - Coal?

I've got L4,000 worth of stuff on that boat that's taken months to get together.

How do I get in touch with him?

I can give you a list of pier masters and their telephone numbers.

Fine. I'II have Pusey start on that right away.

Ah, here you are, then! This is the kind of man you are.

I beg your pardon, ma'am! Just a moment please!

- Who is this woman? - Sarah MacTaggart.

The legitimate owner of the puffer.

And whatever money you owe is to be paid to me or I'II go to the police.

- Mrs MacTaggart... - Miss!

Miss MacTaggart, I'm sorry to inform you that I owe you no money at all.

- On the contrary, your father... - He's not my father! He's my brother.

Whoever he is, he stole L4,000 worth of...

Who... What? Who is this man?

- I don't know, Mr Marshall. - Frazer's the name, Mr Marshall.

- Of the Evening News. - What?

You mean...?

Are you the one who thinks this is so funny?

(Horn blasts)

Ahoy!

Ahoy, MacTaggart!

You've to telephone the Central Hotel in Glasgow.

To a Mr Marshall.

Ahoy! MacTaggart!

MacTaggart!

Yes, that's right, honey. It's just a routine business matter.

What?

Well, either by train tonight or on the first plane tomorrow morning.

If I stay over, I'II ring you later tonight.

That's right, dear.

Well, thanks for calling, honey. Bye bye.

Yes?

I just had a call from the harbour master at Greenock.

- He said that puffer arrived there... - Great. Here's the plan. Tell Pusey...

But they just turned around and sailed right out again.

Can you get another half knot out of her? She's not making more than five.

- She's making six. - Five at the most.

- She's making six. - Then see if she'II make seven.

She cannae make seven. What's the matter with you?

You would no' spend a penny on the boiler.

- We need to get to Kiltarra. - Who got the boat stuck on the Subway?

Mr MacGregor, I'II have no insubordination on board my vessel.

Insubordination?

Who was too drunk to find their way out of Campbeltown harbour?

Come out and face me like a man, you old goat! I'm going to resign...

(Plane engine roars)

I'm sure that's him. Let's have another look.

If he does that again, Iet him have it, both barrels!

They're making for the Crinan Canal at Ardrishaig.

Where's the nearest place you can set us down?

Campbeltown, sir.

If you hire a car, you can catch them before they get through the canal.

Will it not be the American, Mr Marshall?

It's most unlikely. And if it is, he'II have seen how far we've come.

He'II know he's got nothing to worry about.

Once we're in the canal, we'II be safe enough.

What kind of boat are you trying to catch, sir? A puffer, by any chance?

- Yes. - They're grand boats, the old puffers.

Always getting into trouble!

Did you read about the one that got stuck on the Subway?

MacTaggart her skipper is. There's a man for you.

Only last month in Campbeltown I've seen him drunk three times in one day.

(d Concertina plays soulful tune)

- Hamish. - What?

Pheasants.

Skipper.

- Ship's stores are getting low. - Aye.

Off you go.

(Birds screech)

(Tyres screech)

Holy smoke! They've caught us.

Well, look who's here! It's Mr Pusey.

How are you, sir?

What brought you all the way to Crinan?

We thought you'd returned to London, sir. We didn't expect to find you here.

Och, man! Your cargo's safe and sound. There's not a scratch on it.

I don't think I've met this gentleman before.

Is it Mr Marshall himself, by any chance?

That's right. That's my cargo you've got on board this hulk.

- Listen, the Maggie is a fine old puffer. - Are you serious?

- Oh, a coat of paint... - You were going to take this out to sea?

- We'II be in Kiltarra not later than... - You may be, but not with my cargo.

Oh, but I don't really understand, Mr Marshall.

I'm not going to say anything about your misrepresentation

- when you showed Pusey the wrong boat. - Wrong boat?

- There must be some misunderstanding. - I don't even want my L50 back.

It must've cost you something to get this far.

You're going to turn this tub around, go back to Ardrishaig, unload my cargo,

so I can get it on a good boat, and I'm putting Mr Pusey on to see that you do it.

- Me, sir? - Yes, you, sir.

Mr Marshall, I can assure you we are capable of doing the job for you.

There's no sense in you going to additional expense.

What? Don't talk to me about expense!

Look, if for any reason whatsoever he hasn't got you in Ardrishaig by 5:00,

- call the police, right? - Er... Yes, sir.

Stay overnight in Ardrishaig if you have to,

but make sure the stuff gets on the right boat.

I'II expect you in London some time tomorrow.

(Car engine starts)

Are we ready to proceed?

- I said, are we ready to proceed? - We cannae go yet.

- Why not? - We're waiting for the mate and the boy.

Where are the mate and the boy?

(Gunfire)

- They're poaching. - Aye. Ha-ha!

I don't see anything amusing in breaking the law.

They're here somewhere. They'II not get away this time.

Go fetch the constable.

You look over here. I'II take this side.

Hamish!

I know you're in there. Come out!

(Birds fly off)

- Mr Pusey! What are you doing here? - You're to come back to the boat at once.

- Shh. They're after us. - The boat is returning to Ardrishaig.

Shh.

- Shh! It's the laird. - Don't you manhandle me!

- The laird! - The what?

- If we're caught, it's jail for us. - Jail?

I'II not be a party to any illegal...

Get down. They'II see us.

If he catches us, we'II never get away at all.

- This is ridic... - (Laird) Come out!

You can't escape!

Come out!

Sir Charles, where are you, sir?

This way!

When he gets past that ditch, make a run for it.

- Where's my hat? - Take this. I have too much to carry.

Don't drop it. If they find it, we're sunk.

There they are. After them!

Please, this has nothing to do with me!

Hey!

What are you doing in my woods? You're poaching, aren't you?

- I can explain everything. - You're poaching, aren't you?

No.

(Cries out)

I can't swim!

(Gurgling)

Arrest that fellow! Arrest that...

Here he is!

(Laughter)

- Where's Mr Pusey? - He chucked the laird in the canal!

(d Concertina plays)

(AII laughing)

- Good evening. - Good evening.

My editor said Mr Marshall wanted me to drop by.

Good evening, Mr Frazer. Come in.

- Mr Marshall, will that be all? - Call me half an hour before train time.

Sit down, won't you?

- I ask, isn't that a little bit too much? - Too much, Mr Marshall?

You had a good laugh at my expense yesterday, so OK.

Why must you make me out to be a complete fool?

I certainly didn't intend to be offensive, sir.

Frazer, I'm in the transport business. It's my job.

I have a certain reputation for being efficient, for getting the job done.

My shipment to Kiltarra is personal, but even so,

if certain people read your little stories, it wouldn't do me any good.

Do you understand? Why make a career out of my difficulties?

Well, Mr Marshall, these old puffers are public characters in Scotland.

- They're very popular. - They're not very popular with me.

No, but they are held in great... I won't say "esteem".

Well, people like them. They've affection for them.

They're not much to look at, I admit, but there's something kind of...

heart-warming about them.

Now, you're an important man in the transport world, you might not see it,

but they've got a touch of tradition, Mr Marshall.

The old simple "Iive and let live" of human values...

- This old MacTaggart's a scoundrel. - (Phone ringing)

That tub is a disgrace, yet you get a big kick out of it

- every time he gets away with murder. - I admit that...

Nobody can accuse me of not having a sense of humour.

I like a joke as much as the next fella and I can take a joke.

- Hello? - Sorry to disturb you Mr Marshall.

I've had a message from Captain Anderson at Ardrishaig.

He hasn't been contacted by anybody. The puffer hasn't returned.

What?

- What? - (Phone ringing)

It's almost ten o'clock. There must be some mistake.

Pusey is actually on board. How could they possibly...?

- Mr Pusey's on the other line. - Hang on, Mr Campbell.

Pusey's just rung in.

Hello, Pusey? It's about time! Have they started loading...?

What?

Well, where are you?

Where?

AII I wanted you to do was to...

Pusey, how could you possibly have gotten arrested for poaching?

Yes, sir. Yes, I will.

- Yes, thank you... - (Phone cut off)

That was Mr Marshall. He's going to get on to our legal department.

- We'II see how long I have to remain... - That will be three shillings, sir.

Why can't I take a room at the inn?

You're to stay until the sheriff's ready to see you.

The sheriff? Oh, the magistrate.

Look, I won't stand for this. I demand to speak to the magistrate.

Who is he? What's his name?

He's the laird, the one you pushed in the canal.

(Locks door)

If he doesn't get his cargo aboard our boat by tomorrow afternoon...

Thank you. He'II, er...

he'II have to make other arrangements.

(Chuckles)

He'II be lucky if he finds them.

I wish I could see his face right now.

He wants somebody from the legal department to fly to Glasgow at once.

Whoever goes is to be fully briefed on the laws relating to poaching.

- He's to wait at the Central Hotel. - Poaching?

Would you get me Mrs Marshall, please? Yes.

- It's true she's no idea what he's doing? - Yes.

- Why? - It's supposed to be a sort of surprise.

Well, he's certainly generous.

Yes, when he has a reason.

When I threatened to walk out last year, he doubled my salary.

Where do you figure they're heading for?

It looks like they're putting in for Inverkerran for the night.

If they thought I thought they were going to Inverkerran,

- where do you think they'd head for then? - Strathcathaig, maybe.

I know this sounds silly,

but if they thought I'd think they were going to Strathcathaig

because it looks as if they're going to Inverkerran,

where would they head for then?

My guess would be Penymaddy.

If there's such a thing as a triple bluff, I'II bet MacTaggart invented it.

OK, Penymaddy.

Aye, he'II have guessed we were making for Inverkerran.

Will he not go there himself, then?

Och, no. He'II know we know he's seen us.

They'd be expecting us to make for Strathcathaig instead.

- Then shall I set her for Penymaddy? - No.

If it should occur to him that it's occurred to us

that he'd be expecting us to make for Strathcathaig,

then he'd think we'd be making for Penymaddy.

- Then shall I set her for Pinwhinnoich? - Och, no.

We'II make for Inverkerran, just as we'd planned.

It's the last thing he's likely to think of.

- How much do I owe you? - That'II be Ardnamessan to Penymaddy,

Penymaddy to Strathcathaig, Strathcathaig to Inverkerran.

That'II be... L12 please.

Well, there's L5.

And L7 for yourself. Right?

Sonny?

Hey, sonny.

Sonny?

Do you know this puffer, the Maggie?

I just want to ask you a question. You know Captain MacTaggart?

You don't belong...?

(Cock crows)

Yes, I caught them - at Inverkerran.

How soon can the boat get here?

Oban?

Yes, Mr Campbell, but...

I'd have to sail with them. I'm not Ietting these lunatics out of my sight.

AII right, if it would save a whole day.

Don't worry, it'II be there. What?

Oh, just a minute, operator.

Give me a shilling, will you?

It'II be there!

Is it worth your while going 30 minutes to Oban?

It's sailing in the wrong direction. We could be in Kiltarra...

MacTaggart, I can think of 19 reasons why you should be put in jail!

Taking L50 under false pretences.

Having Pusey put in jail for poaching.

You cost me two days of aeroplanes at L16 an hour.

Enough on taxis to... Well, to buy a fleet of taxis!

- I ought to sue you! - If I've offended you in any way...

But the real reason I'm taking the cargo away from you

is because nobody gets away with trying to make a monkey out of me.

30 miles to Oban.

Och, many things might happen in 30 miles.

- The engine. - (Footsteps approach)

I have been thinking about the various things that might happen

to prevent our getting to Oban by this afternoon, such as engine trouble.

It's only fair to warn you, gentlemen,

I built a better engine than that when I was eight years old.

(d Concertina plays lyrical melody)

Mr Marshall, sir?

Yes?

- I'm feeling there's some fog coming on. - Fog?

Aye. Might be wise to put her in somewhere.

- How can you tell? - Well, with the time of year

and that big nip in the air and the way the wind's lying.

You might call it seaman's instinct.

Tell me, MacTaggart, are you out of your mind

or is it just you think you've driven me out of mine?

Fog!

(Horn blasts)

(Plop)

- What's he doing that for? - Radar.

- What do you mean, radar? - If it plops, we're OK.

But if it rattles...

(Plop)

- If it rattles, what? - We'II know we've made a mistake.

(Horn blasts)

- I want to ask you... - (Horn blasts)

I'm taking her into Fiona Bay to beach her. It's what she was built to do.

What makes you sure we'II get into Fiona Bay and not onto some rocks?

I'm not sure that I could explain it, sir.

It's what you might call a seaman's instinct.

Hey, it's 4 o'clock. Why didn't somebody wake me?

- Well, you see... - Never mind. Show me where we are.

We're just there, sir.

Where's the nearest place with a telephone?

Well, you could walk back to Inverkerran, but that's over the hill there.

It'd be quicker to go to Loch Mora.

- Just there, sir. - That's ten miles!

- Yes. - AII right, let's go.

- Come on. Let's go. - You're wanting me to come with you, sir?

You don't think I'm going to let you drift away again?

The tide will not be in for hours. She's not on wheels.

Come along anyway. The exercise will do you good.

Come on!

(Cock crows)

Well, Alastair.

Well, how are you? What are you going to have?

On the beach?

There's no possibility of keeping Captain Anderson's boat another day.

Oh, aye. Loch Mora. You're in luck.

We have a cattle boat calling there tomorrow to pick up some geese.

There's an abandoned pier there which is being dismantled next week.

What?

It's more than abandoned. I'd say it's debauched.

It's wonderful to think of old Davy reaching his 100th birthday.

There's a few people would like to get across to Bellabegwinnie for the party.

You'II no' be going across yourself, Peter?

(Marshall) I'm developing an unusual sense of humour.

I cannae be sure.

The stuff will on the pier at 3 o'clock tomorrow afternoon.

Thank you. Goodbye.

Let's get there before it's dark.

Would you not prefer to tuck up here for the night? It would be most comfortable.

We could bring the puffer along in the morning.

Come on!

Right away.

It's been a grand evening.

You were quite right. The exercise has done me good.

(Joints crack)

(Engine chugging)

- Good morning, sir. - Where are we?

- It's a fine day. - Where are we?

Where are we on this thing?

Just about there. That's Beinn Chreagach over yonder.

That's Beinn na Croise over there. We'II be in Loch Mora under the hour, sir.

- Morning, sir. - Morning.

Will you not be having some breakfast, sir?

No, I'II wait till I get to, um...

(Sizzling)

- There's more eggs, sir. - No, thanks.

I couldn't eat another thing. That's the biggest meal I've eaten in years.

- More tea? - AII right. Just a little.

Thanks.

Don't they call you anything but "the wee boy"?

- My name's Douggie, sir. - Douggie, eh?

Well, Douggie, you can certainly cook ham and eggs.

Why won't you let the captain take the cargo for you, Mr Marshall?

Because he caused me a great deal of trouble and expense.

I know, but why won't you let him take the cargo?

Well, he made a...

He double-crossed me. He disobeyed all my instructions.

He didn't pay any attention to anything I said. He behaved very badly.

Hm. But why won't you let him take the cargo?

Douggie, I could use a few people Iike you in my own business!

You ought to come and work for me.

I wouldna' want to leave the captain.

The captain's the best skipper in the coastal trade.

Everybody knows that. There's no' many skippers like Captain MacTaggart.

You're so right.

Tell me, is it true? Was the captain really born on this boat or is that...?

- Yes, sir. He was. Here in this cabin. - How'd it happen?

Well, sir, the Maggie was just launched.

The captain's granddad was the skipper. His dad was the mate.

The captain was supposed to be born at Applecross,

but his mother needed a doctor.

They were taking her across to Portree.

There was a storm, so the captain was born right here on the Maggie.

Why don't you let him take the cargo for you, sir?

(Geese cackling)

(Geese cackling loudly)

(Conversation inaudible)

(Cattle mooing)

(Creaking)

- Captain, sir? - Aye.

Look at the way she's lying. If the tide comes in, will she not catch the pier?

- Hamish, slack her off a bit. - Wait a minute, sir.

If you left her the way she is... and the tide came in, would there not be...

(Whispers) ...an accident?

(Creaking)

You're a good lad, Douggie, and I'm not denying it.

You'II be a skipper one day.

Tell Mrs Marshall I'II be home tomorrow definitely.

Thank you. Yes, that's right. Goodbye.

AII right, boys. I'II buy the drinks.

(Creaking)

(Douggie giggles)

(Men laughing)

AII right, let me in on it. What's so funny?

(Laughter)

(Creaking)

(Cattle mooing)

(Mooing)

(Creaking)

- Hey! - (Moo)

Hey!

Hey! Hey!

Hey, move your boat! It's breaking up the pier, please!

The boat! Away from the pier!

Come on, you!

Move the boat out.

Get going. Get in there. Do something.

- There's some trouble here. - Get in the window.

Get the boat out.

Move it out! You, do something! Out! Out!

(Mooing)

Out, out. Move the boat out.

Do something.

Do you not think it will be better, all things considered...

Move it out. You're going to tear the pier down!

(Creaking/mooing)

Move it out! Out!

Back!

Move it back!

(Pier creaking and groaning)

Stop your engine. Bring it back!

- What did he say? - He said to take her back in again.

- He said to back her up. - But Mr Marshall...

How can I back her in with the pier here?

Back! Back! The pier!

Move it back!

No, no!

(Moo)

No, no, no, no.

No, no, no.

(Engine stops)

(Moo)

Och, well, they were going to dismantle it anyway.

(Laughter)

Would you take a look at that?

(Moo)

Sir.

Excuse me, sir. Are you Mr Marshall, sir?

I'm no longer absolutely sure.

Well, I'm afraid there's nothing we can do for you, sir.

We can't get your cargo out here,

and we draw too much to get in by the wharf.

I know.

No, there's nothing that can get at it except...

the puffer.

(Moo)

Of course you understand, Mr Marshall,

I have every sympathy for your predicament

but, well, it wouldn't be in our best interest to take the job

unless we were going the whole journey to Kiltarra.

Without meaning any offence, Mr Marshall,

it would simplify matters if you could see your way

to letting us have the rest of our fee in advance.

Well, John, set them up again.

He's talking to somebody in London.

I've never seen such a man for the telephoning.

It will be the American way, everything in a rush.

Aye, but he's not a man that's at peace with himself.

(d Concertina plays a jolly tune)

Anything wrong, Mr Marshall?

You'II be amused to know that Mr Pusey's now out ofjail.

That's good news. I was very disturbed...

You'II also be amused to know that Mrs Marshall found out what I was doing.

That's the last thing in the world I wanted to have happen.

I want to sort of get a shave, and I was wondering...

(Grunting)

(Child giggles)

(Quacking)

Mr Marshall, they were wanting a lift,

and I thought you wouldn't mind if we dropped them off on the way.

- Mr MacDougall, Mr Marshall. - Why are we sailing south?

- We're taking on coal in Bellabegwinnie. - But...

- Roger MacDougall, Mr Marshall. - How do you do?

- Isn't that out of our way? - Just a bit.

Miss MacDougall, Mr Marshall, the owner of our cargo.

It'II save time in the end, sir. Mr Angus MacDougall.

- Glad to see you. - Mrs MacDougall.

I have a phone call to make and I'd like to buy a change of clothes.

- Have we time for that? - Aye. We might manage that, sir.

(Laughter)

Lydia, how can you say it's a silly idea when you haven't seen the place?

I promise you you'II absolutely love it.

It's beautiful, Lydia, dear.

We can be there most of the summer.

What?

No, we... can't talk about it like this over the phone.

Darling, I want you to do something for me. Please, fly out to Kiltarra.

I'II be there some time tomorrow.

We can sit down and discuss it reasonably.

(Click)

Hello? Hello?

Operator? Operator, we've been cut off.

- Operator. - 'Your party's no longer there.'

Thank you.

I'II just wrap these up for you.

- How much do I owe you? - 11 and three.

- Where are the others? - Up in the village, sir.

Aren't we ready to go?

Have they taken on the coal?

No, sir.

Hey, laddie, is Peter MacTaggart there or has he gone to the party?

(Laughter)

MacTaggart.

Mr Marshall, I was just coming to find you.

I'm afraid they can't let us have the coal till tomorrow.

Sit. Sit down.

Look, I know you came here because somebody's having a party,

- but I want to ask you one thing. - Well, it's old Davy MacDougall, sir.

- He sailed with my... - I know he sailed with your father.

- I want to ask you one thing. - My grandfather.

- He was mate when the Maggie was new. - I still want to ask you one thing.

Doesn't the job mean anything at all to you?

It means a great deal. We'II be able to get the Maggie's plates put right...

Then don't you think you should fulfil your contract?

Contract?

You're supposed to be taking me and my cargo to Kiltarra.

But we are taking you, sir. It's only one day's sailing.

- If we're away first thing... - MacTaggart, don't you realise?

If you fail to keep your bargain, I can stop payment on the cheque I gave you?

Oh, no, you couldn't do that, Mr Marshall.

No? Well, if you don't get that thing under way right now...

- You couldn't refuse to pay us. - Why wouldn't I?

- Why shouldn't I? Why couldn't I? - Because you're an honourable man.

I recognised you for an honourable man the first minute I saw you.

Och, there's nothing for you to worry about, sir. We'II get you there.

And Mr Marshall, I've been instructed to tell you

that you're included in the invitations.

(Music and laughter)

Sheila, come on. It's the Bard, he's making the speech.

(Man speaks Gaelic)

Davy MacDougall!

(Continues in Gaelic)

(Speech continues)

Mr Marshall! Will you not come in and join us?

It's Mr Marshall.

Excuse me. Mr Marshall, come in. You'II be made very welcome.

It's old Davy MacDougall's birthday and you must join us, an old puffer man.

Come in. Anna, give him a piece of cake.

Yes, a piece of cake for Mr Marshall. Robbie, get a glass.

100 years old today.

Come on.

(Speaks Gaelic)

Shake hands with him, sir.

Congratulations, sir.

Tell him that where I come from, we have a saying

that the first 100 years are the hardest.

(Speaks Gaelic)

(Laughs)

(AII laugh)

Mr Marshall's all right, Davy boy.

Slainte mhath!

(d Band starts up)

What I can't understand is why you want to spend the whole evening with me,

- when all those young fellas... - Oh, I can always dance with them.

It's exciting to meet a stranger. Not many strange men come to Bellabegwinnie.

Besides, it'II do the two of them good.

They've been watching you every minute. Who?

The one in the window is Donald MacDougall. He's a fisherman.

The one in the door is Ian McCullough. He owns the store by the pier.

The question is, which should I marry?

Oh?

It's very difficult when you're only 19 to make such a decision.

Be easier if I were older. I would know so much more.

I mean, about men.

Well, how are you going to choose?

Oh, everyone says that Ian should be the one because he owns the store.

Already he's planning to buy another on Colonsay.

And people say that Ian McCullough will be a great man one day.

- And the other one, Donald MacDougall? - He's...

He's just a fisherman who sails with his brothers,

when they're not all drinking or fighting or running after girls.

He hasn't much money.

He's not so handsome as Ian McCullough. Everyone agrees to that.

I don't want to influence you, Sheila, but it doesn't seem a very difficult choice.

You mean I should marry Ian?

If he really wants to be somebody and make something of himself.

You want a man you know can take care of you and give you the things you need.

Yes.

It would be exciting to be married to a man who will do big things,

a man who was going so far in the world.

It would be exciting to be taken to places, to be given fine clothes

and expensive presents.

Yes, I would like all those things.

But I... I think it will be the other one I'II be taking.

Why?

Oh, it's simply that, even though he's away with his brothers so much,

he'II have more time for me.

He'II not be so interested in what he's trying to do or where he's going to.

Because he'II just be fishing.

And when he's come home from the fishing, there'II just be me.

And when we are very old,

we'II have only what we've been able to make together for ourselves.

And I... I think perhaps that... that is all we'II need.

Good morning, Mr Marshall.

- (Groans) - I thought you might like some tea, sir.

Put it over there.

Where are we?

- We're still in Bellabegwinnie, sir. - Bellabegwinnie.

One o'clock. My watch must've stopped.

One o'clock!

Why aren't we under way? Where is everybody?

- I think they're up in the village, sir. - Uh?

What?

Let's get this thing organised. Let's get out of here.

- MacTaggart. - Oh, good morning, Mr Marshall.

Will you not join us? A wee drop o' ale will do you no harm.

- No. Let's get going. - But you'II have just one, sir.

You left the celebrations abruptly, but the hair of the dog that bit you...

MacTaggart, I've got problems. My wife is waiting for me in Kiltarra.

I've got to talk to her. Let's get going. I'm serious!

Well, er...

I'm afraid we cannae go just at the minute, sir.

You see... Hamish is missing ever since last night.

I'm very angry with him, sir! Very angry indeed!

- Let's leave him. Let's get going! - Well, you see...

What with Hamish missing, I thought you wouldn't mind

and I told Mr MacGregor that it would be all right if he went to visit his cousin.

- It's only a mile away and... - AII right, MacTaggart.

I've had about all I can take from you.

If you're not on that boat in one minute and under way, I'II ruin you!

I understand how you feel, Mr Marshall, but you come with me...

- You old fool! You're drunk already! - Mr Marshall!

- Mr Marshall! - Oh, have a drink, Peter.

I want to make a telephone call.

- Where to, sir? - Let me think.

Central Hotel, Glasgow. I want to speak with a Mr Pusey.

AII right, MacTaggart, you asked for it from the word go and now you got it.

I bought your rotten hulk right out from under you.

I bought it, don't you understand? The thing belongs to me.

- You've bought the Maggie? - That's right.

What are you going to do with her, sir?

I'm going to take my cargo to Kiltarra as soon as authorisation comes through

and I'II have no trouble getting a crew.

You can come or stay, as you like.

As soon as I get my stuff landed in Kiltarra, I'm selling that thing for junk!

Mr Marshall, sir?

- Ye cannae do it. - I'm sorry, Douggie.

I'm tired of all this. I'm not interested in MacTaggart's problems.

I've got enough of my own. I don't care what you think, the man's a crook!

- No! - He's a petty thief.

- He's not. - He's a liar, don't you understand that?

He's lied and lied and lied. He's pulled every trick in the book.

Well, he's pulled his last trick on me...

(Thud)

You'd better go aboard.

I think I've killed him.

Douggie?

Could I speak to Mr Marshall, please?

Calvin B Marshall.

He told me to telephone him at this number as soon as...

- He's what? - He's not available just at this minute.

- You can leave a message. - Well, it's very urgent.

Will you please write it down?

I have contacted Miss MacTaggart...

and she refuses to sell.

In any circumstances.

- How is he, doctor? - Nothing to worry about.

But he must rest. I've given him a strong sedative.

He won't wake until morning.

Skipper.

She wouldna' sell.

With any luck, we'II have him in Kiltarra by the time he wakes up.

Best get under way.

Come on, Douggie.

Well, how are you now, Mr Marshall?

That was quite a nasty accident you had.

- It was the latch... - Is the wee boy Douggie on board?

Tell him I'd like to see him, will you?

(Hamish) He's awake and he wants to see Douggie.

(Douggie) No, I won't see him. (MacTaggart) It's all right, laddie.

You'd better go.

You might have killed me, Douggie.

Did you hear what I said? You might have killed me.

Why?

You were taking the Maggie away from the captain.

- I had every right to buy... - You did not!

Anyway, there was a message. Captain's sister wouldn't sell it.

What? Why not?

You wouldna' understand.

- How soon do we get in? - An hour, maybe.

You were going to leave the captain ashore.

- You didn't care what happened to him. - He doesn't care what happened to me.

- He got you here! - After seven days...

You were going to take his ship!

I'm sorry for what happened.

- You are? - Aye, but I'd do it again.

Maybe the captain was a bit slow getting your cargo to Kiltarra for you.

You may not think much of his boat.

Maybe he's no' the best skipper in the coastal trade, like I said.

But that was no reason to do what you did.

(Engine stops suddenly)

- What's the matter with it? - I told you it would never get there.

- The whole contraption's tied with wire. - I told you if it gets hot to...

What do you mean "if" it gets hot? It's always hot! You feel it.

Listen to me. You forgot to put oil in the saddle block!

- You'II never get it! - We're in dangerous waters.

- Holy smoke, look! - What ye blitherin' about?

I cannae do everything!

We're sunk! I'm going to abandon this ship right now.

Will ye not be daft? I'II not abandon ship.

(MacGregor) There's nothing but fights.

If I don't get out, I'II commit murder!

I'm no' going to go down with this ship...

- What's the matter? - There's no cause for alarm, sir.

Well, what's the matter?

- What happened to the engine? - It's the connecting rod.

- Well, can't you fix it? - We haven't the tools.

- Let me have a look at it. - She's finished. We're finished.

He wouldnae spend a penny or do anything I asked.

The boiler hasnae been cleaned in nearly a year.

- She's throwing soot everywhere... - Fix that wedge.

The wedge? Aye. AII the boiler valves are leaking.

He never gives me any waste or paraffin and the slices of the rake are burnt away.

And look at the fire bars. I've got coal dripping into the ash pit.

I've no soap nor soda. You ought to hear what Hamish says.

- Hold that wedge. - Even the ropes are falling to pieces.

The rattlings are gone. The bogey funnel smokes.

We cannae even eat decent.

The spanners don't fit and we haven't any paint.

She'II break! You'II never do it!

Y-you'II tear the engine apart.

Give me a monkey wrench. A monkey wre... Oh!

Get ready to turn on the steam! Go ahead.

Aye.

(Gush of steam)

- Skipper! - Aye.

Hamish?

Hamish, get the hatches up and see if she's making any water forward.

Robbie, is she showing anything in the engine room?

- She's sitting solid! - What are you going to do?

- There's nothing coming through yet. - Get the winch started.

Douggie, give a hand with the lifeboat. The tide's on the turn.

- It'II be on the ebb within the hour. - She's dry enough, skipper.

- I think she's sound. - Then give a hand with the lifeboat.

Can't you get her off with the engine? I fixed it.

Can't you throw an anchor and kedge her off?

Not when she's two feet up. Not when the tide's on the ebb.

- You're going to abandon ship? - Your cargo will be safe enough, sir.

When you get ashore, you'II be able to get to Kiltarra within half an hour.

Right, Hamish.

You can arrange for another boat to come alongside and trans ship.

You've got 12 hours. There's plenty of craft about.

Won't the tide set her down harder on the rocks?

It'II be falling away and there'II be no damage to your cargo,

not till the tide's on the flood.

- Best get off, sir. Go with him, Douggie. - No, I...

Wait for me!

But what happens then? To the boat, I mean.

She'II not be able to take that sort of punishment. It'II break her back.

Well, we got to within five miles of Kiltarra.

It wasn't too bad for an old puffer.

- What if we jettison the cargo? - Sir?

- What if we threw the stuff overboard? - You cannae do that...

- Just answer the question. - Cannot throw it overboard.

It's nearing high tide. If the wind held outside, the tide might no' go away.

We might have a chance, but you cannae be serious, man.

It cost you more than the boat's worth.

Throw the stuff overboard.

Don't worry, it was bound to happen.

It was the only thing left that could happen.

Skipper?

There's one thing I forgot to tell you, sir.

With one thing and another, I'm afraid we never got round to the business of...

insuring the cargo.

I want you to understand something, and I'm serious.

If you laugh at me for this, I'II kill you with my bare hands.

Throw it over.

I don't understand.

The cargo!

Where's Mr Marshall?

- Mr Marshall... - Is my wife here?

Yes, she's up at the house.

Mr Marshall, they sent me to find a payoff for the story, but this is something!

- What happened? - Don't ask me. I couldn't tell you.

Mr Marshall, there is one small problem, if you could give us your opinion on it.

Apart from the expression of our appreciation of...

AII right, MacTaggart, forget it.

We were wondering, sir, as there was some misunderstanding

about whether we should have carried the cargo in the first place,

and as, owing to various circumstances,

we took somewhat longer than we planned,

and as, unfortunately, we didn't insure the cargo,

and especially as the cargo all lies at the bottom of the sea...

- Well? - We was wondering, sir, if...

perhaps you might feel that...

it would be right if we offered you

your money back.

MacTaggart, in seven days, that's the first thing you've said that made sense.

If you're not going to pay us so we could have our plates put right,

why didn't you let us stay on the rocks?

You might as well.

- Oh, thank you. - That was very decent of you.

- If you ever want another job done. - Goodbye, Mr Marshall.

- Goodbye, Mr Marshall. - Goodbye, Mr Marshall.

And good luck to ye.

(d Woman sings a Gaelic song)

Have you ever heard of a puffer called...

the Calvin B Marshall?

(MacGregor) Are you blaming me for getting the boat stuck on the rocks?

- I'm making no accusations. - You're accusing me!

You're not even fit to be the skipper of the Govan ferry.

Mr MacGregor, I'm giving you a warning...

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