Original subtitles

The echoes of the era of kings and emperors still reverberated.

The Danube still seemed beautiful

and cerulean blue.

Yes...

the Giant Ferris wheel still turned on Vienna's Prater

as dark clouds once again gathered above

Central Europe, homeland of people not civilized enough to ensure

that violence and demagogy had disappeared.

A certain unemployed, failed painter

had returned to his fatherland

to annex it to the country where he was Fuhrer.

GUMPENDORF, SUBURBS OF VIENNA. MARCH, 1938.

Crackerjack.

Perfect.

What happened to the tenant?

Life is a string of paradoxes, Mr. Schneider.

Your name means 'tailor'', yet you're a juggler.

My name isn't Juggler, and I'm a tailor.

Why?

Would I be a juggler if I were just a bit taller?

Would I be working in the midget circus if I were

160 cm tall, or even 158?

No, Mr. Haber, I'd be a dandy

and spend time at Zacher's

looking at the shapely hips of beautiful ladies

and not be asking stupid questions.

Which reminds me...

doesn't this jacket make me look fat?

It ought to slim me, so that I'd look taller.

You're right, Mr. Schneider.

Let's not ask stupid questions.

If you want to be taller, go see a cobbler

or to an oculist and have him make an optical illusion.

I know one, Dr. Perlman, who's been in Vienna

for 20 years.

- A Jew? - Like us, but respectable.

They'd just write.

They still are.

We'd better go back inside.

Jews, out!

''Jews, out''?

No, no, I didn't meant it like that.

What I meant to say was this...

Jewish children

please leave, as daddy has to make a telephone call.

Take this army outside.

But the dagoes are still dug in.

What business is that of yours?

Don't argue with history. Let me make my phone call.

Telephone call for you, counselor.

Some German.

Haber?

The said it was a German.

What?...Counselor? No, that's just a nickname.

No, I'm no lawyer. What's up with you, Haber?

Bad news.

Close the shop and come to Krakow with your family.

I don't know anyone there.

You'll be the 'Viennese Tailor.'' Krakow's elite will come to you...

doctors, lawyers, professors from the Jagellonian University.

University professors always buy off the rack.

Sew robes.

Haber, listen

you're not a Jewish writer; you can't afford pessimism.

You're a Jewish tailor and you have children to raise.

Close up, and bring the family. Have no fear...

what am I here for?

Mr. Hitler, what is 'tomorrow''? Give me just a few days

and I am out of here.

Moritz...

One, two, three, again a, there's no place like Vienna.

You want to jump from the frying pan

into the fire.

I saw the doctor today and told him I had a cough.

He asked me if I coughed when I was 20.

''No.''

When I was 40? ''No,'' again. 60? ''No, never,'' I said.

So he said to me...

Mr. Haber, when do you plan to start coughing?

Go to Krakow, if you like.

Since I cough in Vienna, and I am to cough in Krakow

I prefer to cough in Palestine.

Mr. Schneider, it's the eleventh hour

The eleventh hour.

DESERTERS' GOLD

You could've made yourself lieutenant.

Too much for only four soldiers, but a corporal not enough.

Everyone's afraid of a sergeant; they're always ass-kickers.

I knew one who was like my mother, understanding and intelligent.

Where was that?

It's not important; the less you know, the less you'll spill.

A sergeant can't have a rifle!

No?

Starring

Set design

Music by

Director of photography

Screenplay written and directed by

KRAKOW, AUGUST 1939

Those were the days. A pleasure to recall them.

For him too, but Mr. Kite tells stories better than he does.

What do you mean?! The children laugh.

They don't need a lot, and they're playing army.

Do you have children, Mrs. Kite?

Mrs. Haber is speaking to you.

I'm sorry.

I've lived with Mr. Kite for 10 years, but he's never asked

me to change my name to his.

Mine is funny, Barbara Pigeon.

So far

I haven't hatched him any children.

Your name isn't funny; I like it very much.

Keep it. It's cozy in our nest.

You know how he seduced me? He brought me a bird book.

So? I don't understand.

A pigeon and a kite are birds. Kites are predators.

And a pigeon is such a charming bird to peck at.

I don't understand.

A kite is a type of hawk, a bird of prey.

Really?

Really

Yes.

A customer? Are you expecting anyone?

A customer at the kitchen door? I could be Mr. Pytel.

He's a janitor at the university, my only customer from academia.

Here for his alterations.

Times are hard.

His order has been ready for a month.

There's someone to see Mr. Kite.

Did you tell anyone?

Silbermann, in case he saw Red

from Warsaw.

You know.

Red?

He's free?

I can't stand him. Don't get involved.

I have to help him.

- Ask him to come in. - No, I'll go.

Hi, lawyer.

How'd you find me here?

Silbermann lives in the building.

- On the next floor. - Really?

What's up?

The German Consul. His wife's going to the opera.

I'm meeting the maid for a little roll in the hay.

I've been working on her for a week and she'd letting me in tonight.

We'll have an hour. I'll tell Silbermann.

Wait!

And the consul?

He left for Berlin this morning.

The krauts are up to something.

So what; I've got to get even for the time I did in jail.

With your help; you owe me.

Is this nice?...

Hi, Basia!

I'm not Basia to you!

He's my pal.

But not mine.

Excuse me.

Basia's right, I acted like a clod.

I guess I'll have to invite you two

for supper where we can break the ice over some vodka.

- Hurry it up, will you? - What if I don't?

Quiet! You'll wake up the whole house.

No, it's me, Truda. No, she's still at the opera.

Yes, I'll tell her. I'll stay up till she returns.

That was the consul; he wants his wife in Berlin immediately.

Someone in the family must be ill.

Forget that, come back to bed.

KRAKOW, CAPITAL OF THE GENERAL GOUVERNMENT IN MARCH, 1942.

Hey lawyer, catch!

POLES TO ARMS

I only read fairy tales at bedtime.

But it's really something! Read what it says.

I don't give a shit.

Pick it up!

Give it back, it's mine,

What's that?

Love letter.

Let's see.

You don't read other people's mail.

You're right.

Back to work!

Lawyer saved your ass again.

OCCUPIED WARSAW NOVEMBER, 1942

Is this it?

Yeah, second floor.

Jadzia!

Yes?

It's me, open up.

Jadzia's not home?

- You here to see her? - No, just asking.

- Who's this? - Buddy of mine.

I'll just finish my soup.

What do you want?

Mr. Zenon Pisur?

Born May 11

1901 in Mlawa?

So?

By order of a court martial of the Polish Underground

Zenon Pisur

son of Teodor

for crimes, treason and

collaboration with the Nazis is condemned to death.

Justification.

Under pretense of sheltering Jews who'd escaped from the ghetto

you then informed the Gestapo, who then killed...

Hi.

- Why'd you shoot the meat loaf? - She'd serve it at the wake.

That's if he's dead. Couldn't you wait till I finished?

You don't think I have the fucking nerve?

Attention!

WARSAW, ZOLIBORZ MARCH 1942

Allow me to introduce us, sir.

I am captain Leliwa, of the mounted artillery.

I escaped from a POW camp.

Lieutenant Lotka, trained in Scotland and

in October

parachuted into Poland.

- Second lieutenant Pet... - We've met.

I attended the professor's lectures in my first year of law school.

Sit down, gentlemen.

We can begin.

Gentlemen...

headquarters has received the report of our needs

for arms, medical supplies, spare parts for vehicles, etc.

We have the possibility of buying a lot of weapons and ammunition

from a certain officer

of the Italian division moving from the eastern front

and temporarily stationed in Poland.

These are large amounts, and they require spending

a lot of money, much more than

the quartermaster has.

At the same time, intelligence reports that

the Germans have collected huge sums of money

by robbing and exacting it from Jewish communities.

According to our information

their agents in Switzerland have exchanged this fortune for gold.

Together with gold from Jews, they melted it all down into bars.

This treasure is being held in a bank in Lodz.

Litzmanstadt, since being incorporated into the Reich.

Thus the code name of our outfit.

Auntie...

It is our duty.

What is our life compared with history, or our homeland?

A speck of meaningless dust. That's why we can sacrifice it.

I agree.

Tell auntie I went to Zosia's.

Alarm?

The girl gave the signal for ''Emergency''

2 degree.

Thank you.

Let's play bridge.

We have to form and train a team for the Lodz operation.

Is this bank open and functioning normally?

As a one of the branches, it provides a full range of services

but only to Germans.

How do we get into the safe? Explosives...

or do we frighten and force the staff to unlock it?

A very good question.

Blowing it open is not an option.

It would make a fast escape impossible.

They control

everything.

The employees probably don't know the safe combination

so force is useless.

I guess we have to hire specialists.

Who?

Safecrackers, burglars.

My word!

Why not? I thought of that too. But how do we find them?

We have one.

He did time for burglary before the war, but they were sins of youth.

He joined the underground, a sworn member.

Promoted to sergeant. Maybe he'll open the safe.

Which section?

Executions. Recently carried out a sentence.

Name?

Red.

Before the war we were famous.

Bankers shook with fear of us.

You opened safes?

A bank job is an operation just like on the front lines.

Opening the safe's easy; most important is organization.

Otherwise you panic and everything goes to hell.

So you were attracted to the army and tactics even back then?

- What do you mean, 'then?'' - Back then, Red.

What are you talking about? Who's Red?

- Do I have red hair? - Relax.

You're sergeant ''Red'' and this is squad leader ''Kmicic.''

I'm major ''Jeremi.'' You carried out Pisur's execution.

Sir.

- Sergeant ''Red''... - At ease.

I didn't come here just to get a shave.

And I don't think I'll be a customer of yours.

You're pretty heavy-handed for a safecracker.

I never opened them; I was the lookout.

I see.

I was mislead.

So who opened the safes?

In Grodzisk Jagiellonski, in Grudziadz, in Katowice?

You did those jobs in 1934-35 before you were locked up.

They never proved me guilty. Someone else cracked the safes.

There were two of them, always together: Lawyer and Silbermann.

KRAKOW, DISTRICT KROWODRZA MARCH 1943

Romanian?

In Bucharest you can buy some carrots; good for your eyes.

You are not a good person.

You guessed it.

But your dog licked me.

An axe, a hoe, a saw and a shovel buy an invalid a double

An axe, a hoe, a saw and a flick buy a double make it quick!

Hi.

Long time.

You still alive?

I thought you'd been killed. Nobody's seen you.

I went back to the capital.

The Germans say this is the capital.

I don't give a shit about the Germans.

Robbing your countrymen now?

No.

It seems you perceive me in a completely false light.

Listen to you! A regular man of letters.

That's liters, not letters, and bring me one of vodka.

I'll go sit down somewhere.

I don't wait on tables. You can take it yourself.

It's about Janek and important. If you want to find out what

then bring it.

Wait...

- A private room. - Yes ma'am, bring anything?

No, I'll serve him myself.

When were you at the jail?

Before Christmas, about once every three months.

Next time?

In two weeks.

Listen, Basia. Would you like to see him out?

What a question!

There's a chance; it depends on him

and you.

He has to agree, and you have to pay.

What?

Ask him if he'll go for a triple Auerbach.

What's that?

A big, tough job.

If he asks who, say they can spring him if he goes along with them.

Really?

These days?

People can do a lot if they want. So, will you ask him?

What about that payment?

A trifle. Just my commission.

How much?

Why do you ask?

I know you'll pay any price to get him out.

Everything?

Everything that's most dear.

Right?

Think it over.

Beast!

You know how much a beast can love his master?

You know the terms, yes or no. There'll be no more haggling.

Who?

I don't know, but they have a lot of power.

Well?

Yes.

Tell them I agree.

Waiting for me?

- Did you see him? - Yes.

- And? - He agrees.

Smart move. What about you?

- Do I have any choice? - I guess not.

But nothing in advance.

And after he gets out, you won't be...

afraid?

You?

I'm not afraid of him any more.

You'll get paid when I see him free.

- Hello Mr. Kite. - How about a lift?

Goods delivered.

You staying overnight or leaving later?

We're leaving.

Soon.

But you have to have a drink before you go.

Get lost!

I owe you, gentlemen.

I'll repay my debt by taking part in your enterprise.

But I have three conditions.

Which are?

First, I find a way to get into the bank.

You'll handle the military

organization, the security

and the certain pursuit.

That's what I had planned.

Second, I need my own man to open the safe.

I know, Silbermann; he's in the ghetto, not far from here.

That's why we rented this apartment, to get him out.

Third, I want ten percent of whatever's in the safe.

- What? - Ten percent.

Do you know who we are?

The underground army, partisans, or something like that.

You need money

for resistance activities.

When it comes to patriotism, that's what guides us.

Know what that means?

Your patriotism may come from various premises.

It could be the Sienkiewicz type, na

or political, and better left alone.

You're right.

We value your professionalism, but 10 percent is too much.

How much do you think we'll get out of that bank?

Half a million, at least, or else it wouldn't be worth

springing me from the can.

So you expect a commission of 50,000 dollars?

Yes.

I'll make you a deal.

If there's a half a million, or more, you'll get 50,000.

If less, you'll get 10 percent.

- Agreed? - OK.

It's a deal.

It's me.

In life, you have to pay for everything.

Don't worry.

We'll get even.

Basia...

do you know where your aunt, the archer, is?

What are you doing here? Beat it!

Pass it.

Wait!

I'll get you!

I'll rip your legs off!

Silbermann?

Silbermann.

Stop playing.

Recognize me?

It's me, lawyer.

Lawyer?

You're here too?

For you.

For me? Stop joking.

I need you for a job.

A job? What sort of job here?

Those still alive here are down to their last pennies.

Dead.

Are you a hit man now?

Not here, it's on the other side of the wall.

Are you crazy? They'll kill me out there.

And not here?

I'll die with my own kind.

Silbermann

this is a big job with big money; it'll save you and your family.

I've got no one left.

I have nothing to live for.

I'm alive only

thanks to the Habers.

Are they still here?

I thought they shipped them out to Vienna.

Mrs. Haber died last winter, and the boys disappeared

maybe went over the wall.

Only Haber and his daughter are left.

Stop and let's go.

Stop playing!

Mr. Goldman is alone and he can risk it, I can't.

You have to risk it because of her.

You have to save her.

We've had our sweet moments. Give her a chance too.

Kite, I'm begging you

stop molesting, blackmailing me, I can't do anything rash.

I have to calculate everything coolly and carefully.

How can I when my head's bursting.

Don't force me to make heroic decisions.

I'm a Jewish tailor

not some Tantalus damned to eternal suffering!

Listen, you cretin, I'm the one who's risking everything.

Not long ago in the slammer, I would repeat this every day...

''Don't get caught, and you won't do time.''

Die running, not sitting on the sofa, you schmuck!

Mr. Goldman, why is he calling me a schmuck?

Well.

Help.

I'm not saying anything, because I'm starting to waver.

If you have any sense at all, you can have chicken soup tonight.

Daddy...

Sosza's decided.

Finally...

We had to wait for the priest.

Excuse me, but what do we need a priest for?

You'll see, you doubter.

Pet, you dunce, introduce us.

Yes sir!

Captain Leliwa, Father from Holy Cross Church, and Mrs. Holowiecka

world co-champion.

Lwow, 1932.

No real names, please.

- It's time. - Isn't it too light?

Let's start while you can still see.

Ma'am.

May I have an arrow?

Wait.

Fly

in the name of the lord.

God bless.

Can you shoot from there?

I can't draw the bow; I have to go on the roof.

I'll hold on to you.

You don't need to.

See it?

The mattress?

Yes.

May I?

Captain, permission...

Fire!

- There's the signal. - Let's begin.

Haber, come on.

Get in!

I've thought it over and I think I have to back out.

I feel sick.

Shut up or you'll scare Silbermann.

Silbermann? You mean Goldman, don't you?

Kite, why... Why do you call...

Goldman...

Silbermann?

Welcome Mr. Silbermann.

I'm not Silbermann

I'm Moritz Haber.

And Silbermann... I mean Goldman, is coming.

- Who are you? - A tailor.

- Where's Kite? - We were in the brig together.

This guy's an idiot! What's the meaning of this?

Silbermann?

- Who's this? - My daughter.

Daughter? What's going on here?

Where is Kite?

Mr. Kite promised chicken soup.

Who?

Goldmann.

Silbermann?

Me.

Aha.

I didn't mention it because nobody asked.

Silbermann is a code name for the team of Haber and Goldmann.

They always work together and only together are dependable.

- One's the eyes, the other ears. - And the girl?

We use her when the bars are narrower than a hat brim.

You work wearing hats?

- We have. - You do what you have to.

I even use gloves.

But I meant the width of a head.

Good Lord, it's only the beginning of May!

Wouldn't it be better to go in a week or two?

I'll tell you the truth, ma'am, it's not really a picnic.

I have orders.

We want to take Olenka as camouflage.

The major was too shy to ask.

Olenka...

in our family

the women

have given all for our homeland.

It cannot be otherwise with you.

I agree.

I'm so proud of you.

I have one condition, you must look after yourself.

Promise.

One more thing... Wait here.

You're to wear warm knickers. Nights are still cold.

Auntie!

Need some bromide?

Olenka knows ''Pan Tadeusz'' by heart.

We're on volume 3.

See that kraut?

We could steal his piece.

No.

That punk is probably dreaming about his mommy and milk.

Or Gretchen with big tits.

That's what's pissing me off. I could take it easily...

- They execute for that. - Fine, it'd be chivalrous.

Then challenge him to a duel with battle-axes.

You'll be court martialled! What about your weapon?

Sound asleep dreaming of Gretchen's big tits

or about your mama.

Move it, you're under arrest!

In that case, let them execute fatso.

KOZIENICKA FOREST MAY, 1943

We have six suits including one tuxedo.

That's not a tux, it's tails, like diplomats wear.

- Dress uniform? - One dress and one SS officer.

Haber, the duds are here.

Duds, duds! You're worse than

my supplier of tailoring accessories in Vienna.

What shit!

What's this?

An operetta.

It was at the operetta where I lifted, er...

got it.

I think this is from ''Countess Marica,'' but they wear these.

We even have braid.

What braid, it's a putz from an old red sofa.

Enough of this chit-chat.

Mr. Haber will dye and adapt the tassel.

With what? Maybe you can tell me that?

With shoe polish.

What about transport?

There's a Hungarian jeep, a transporter, and a truck.

- A Hungarian jeep? - They're just like German ones.

I've broken only 16 out of 90 eggs today.

Omelets for supper again.

I don't understand.

He's practicing his touch on eggs

to get it just right.

Show me.

It's very simple.

When you want to open a strange lock...

The major never opens locks.

It's just an expression.

It's all in the fingers.

if you hold it too lightly, the cylinder won't rotate.

Too tight, and you won't know what it's saying to you.

Saying?

That's just an expression.

To hell with you

and all your eggs!

Seventeen.

Not worth a shit, again. I heard you from far away.

What have you got in your pockets?

Empty them!

Keys in a forest? You're jingling like a dog's balls.

You could wake the dead.

And you shouldn't smoke.

Smoking tobacco is the main cause of cancer

and heart attack.

And you've got lunch in case you get lost?

It's only a book.

You had to read. Interesting.

It's just this.

Lieutenant...

is this from your lending library?

All right, let's have everyone fall in.

Fall in, single file!

Attention!

Boys

you're all volunteers who love their homeland

and are ready to die for it.

I do too, but learn how to get your asses out of this war in one piece.

Not only will your women benefit from it

but so will our homeland.

Because after the war, you have to make lots of sons to love it.

That's a lot better than a stupid death on some field of glory.

It's not we who must die in war, but our enemies.

Right?

That was pounded into our heads by captain Wilson...

our trainer in Glasgow.

Yes sir!

And book with patriotic poems you can read to your grandkids

when you're old farts.

This I understand!

Much better.

Beyond duty, a soldier must think only about his beloved.

And of all her sweet charms.

Now show me what you can do.

Hand to hand combat!

Corporal Olenka reporting.

At ease.

I didn't call you here on official business.

A briefing?

I wanted to say good-bye.

Why?

I can't tell you, military secret.

If I reveal it, they'll shoot me.

God!

All I can say is that I might die.

Don't say that. If you died, I'd...

Would you cry?

I couldn't go on living.

Don't cry, you're breaking my heart.

As a farewell, kiss my medal.

I'll give it to you. It'll protect you.

- It's snagged. - Hold on, I'll help you.

I must say farewell to them too.

My one and only, I'll wait for you until the war is over.

We'll begin a new life together in a new homeland.

White rose buds are blossoming.

Come back from the war, Jasiu.

Return and kiss me as you did in the past.

I'll give you roses...

Oh yes!

Offices, soldiers.

We are ready to carry out our mission.

We begin ''Operation Litzmanstadt.''

I think everyone knows their places.

Any questions?

No!

To victory!

Into the vehicles.

Let's go!

END OF PART 1

Part 2

I don't get it, we're supposed to say it's a piano?

If anyone asks.

Who's going to ask?

At some roadblock.

What if they look in here?

Our men will open fire.

Oh.

And us?

Hit the deck.

- I may not make it in time. - Then you'll hit it anyway.

How are you feeling?

At the academy they taught us

that the army ethic was supranational and timeless

but, it still makes me mad as hell.

Want some?

Yes.

Hungarian Army, II Regiment. Roadblock.

Documents please.

The truck driver has them.

Papers.

Orders, etc.

- Didn't he sell us the truck? - Who the hell knows?

Load?

Piano.

With so many guards?

It's an antique Steinway. Paderewski played on it.

You know him?

We're taking it to Berlin for von Karajan's orchestra.

Open the tarp.

Don't shoot!

Benedek!

Unreal!

How'd you get here?

I looked for you in Krakow, but they said the krauts had you.

We'll get you out

the boys.

We'll take a short cut and cut the krauts off.

Wait, I'll show you something.

Paderewski, show yourself, you bungler.

Satoralijaujhel!

An army buddy.

I won't let them take you. On my signal, run for it

and we'll cover you.

No, they're not Germans, and we're not prisoners.

Impersonators.

We're pulling a big job tomorrow. You can help on our way back.

Let me know how I can contact you.

I guess you know what you're doing. I'll be waiting for you.

What about Baldini and Chudej?

Baldini, nothing, and Chudej's in our outfit.

I've got to relieve myself.

You'll really shit when you see who's here.

What are you doing? Why are we standing?

This is Benedek, a friend of mine from the army.

Leliwa, mounted artillery.

Gentlemen, let's go.

See you.

- What's up? - I need to take a crap.

Afraid?

- I ate too many pears. - Pears in May?

Go on, I'll catch up with you.

Got a telephone?

Call Warsaw 12355, Gestapo headquarters.

Operator...

There's an officer here. Connect me with Warsaw 12355...

Gestapo.

Eating butter while soldiers on the front don't even have margarine?

Pigs!

Who's that, partisans?

No, my wife in bed.

What's this, hubby and wife games?

During the day? You should be ashamed.

Not enough at night?

The children sleep with us

so it's awkward... and so when they're in school...

School holidays aren't much fun, eh?

Get the fuck in here. Close the door and wait.

And no fooling around with the wife.

Hi, it's me, Red. Things are moving.

Be on platform 2 at the station in Lodz at 11:00 P.M.

You'll make it.

Is there a rifle under there?

Take off your belt!

How long can you have the runs? A day or two, but not 45 minutes.

Let's go, he'll catch up.

Maybe he had a flat. Let's wait a while longer.

You could've helped, you cow. I'll kill you.

Go ahead, maybe at least that pop-gun of yours works.

- Engine trouble? - Yeah.

- We'll talk after the operation. - All right.

BMW's are junk; Harley-Davidson's going to win the war.

It's 40 km to the border. Should we risk it now?

I'm for it.

The tarp!

What's my name?

Count Ramon Serrano Lopez II.

Not like that, you twerp! Ramon Serrano Lopez II.

Why the second, who's first? I don't want to be second.

- It's more aristocratic. - Why are you so cantankerous?

Butt out, father!

- Something wrong? - No, no...

I'll help you remember our guest's name.

Ramon Serrano Lopez II.

brother-in-law to our ally, Caudillo Franco.

Make sure you remember it. He's going to be famous.

Count Roman Servanto Leopard II.

- That's right. - I'll remember; you may go.

LITZMANSTADT (LODZ) 28 MAY 1943.

Closed.

I can see that! Open up!

General Lopez is here. The director is waiting for us.

The directors not here.

Is there a problem?

The director's left already.

He dared?

He dared not to wait for a diplomatic delegation?

His address and phone number!

Open his office for our guests!

I'll take care of that director!

Red-haired with a beard?

They'll shave it off in Sachsenhausen.

Where is the captain of the guard?

- He's fallen ill. - Is he in the hospital?

No, he's here.

Take us to him!

Attention!

- Which one is the captain? - The one asleep.

On your feet! Wake him up!

Inspection, Pumpernikel, telephone

your old lady's calling.

Not so fast, sweetheart. I was dreaming about Kurzaj

the chicken king.

Recognize him, the company commander in Satoraljaujhel?

Right, it's him.

- Let's hide or he'll recognize us. - So what, it'll confuse him more.

We'd better hide.

Up!

Attention!

You're on duty, not in some brothel!

Too bad.

Attention!

Fall in!

The chicken king with his crown sits on his golden throne

while next to him his queen lays him golden eggs.

Bank guards, patriots, NSDAP members, and independents.

This is retired Major Ernst von Nogay speaking

your daily political and spiritual guide

appealing to you...

No, that's wrong.

How to put it?...I know. My dear patriotic guards...

Captain of the guards reporting: six plus one, together seven...

Shut up, you worm!

You'll be court martialled and do hard time in the brig

and pray each day

for Russian captivity or death.

Lay down your arms!

Dear patriots, bank guards

NSDAP members

and independents.

This is retired major

Ernst von Nogay, your political and spiritual guide.

Impossible, it can't be him. Such coincidences don't happen.

Where?

The studio.

- Where is it? - In the attic.

Where to?

We'll be right back.

Take 2 men

and lock up these morons.

What about me?

It must be him. It's his voice, the bastard!

This only happens in films and this isn't Hollywood.

Do I look like Douglas Fairbanks in a movie?

You look like the doorman at the movies.

And now the news.

The strategic genius

of our Fuhrer permitted simultaneous strikes against Crimea

Charkov, the Caucasus, and

North Africa.

Here.

- Shall we break it down? - Keep it quiet.

I didn't see his mug, but I think it's him.

Kite...

What if it is Dybuk?

- Who? - Dybuk.

Where to?

I've got to go.

And the motorcycle? Someone might steal it.

In Germany?...Who? There aren't any Gypsies or foreigners left.

This is no Germany. All the Jews from Balut live here.

- So you watch it for me. - But not for free.

OK, I'll pay.

Get to work, father.

Today we received

fresh

marvelous news from the eastern front...

It's not Dybuk, it's von Nogay. I think he recognized me.

The SOB!

A general! From which army?

An illusion.

I meant to say General Winter.

The illusion of General Winter in Russia used to frighten us

turns out to be not so dangerous.

It is summer now, it's true, and our army is attacking...

Stop it or I'll get all confused.

I'm a simple secret agent. Let's go in!

Let him talk.

If the police come, we'll look like real listeners.

- That's sophism; you read Spinoza? - Only on the train.

Shut up or I'll go crazy! What are we going to do?

Well block him in and he can go on talking.

He plays like Paganini.

Paganini wasn't a priest.

I can't concentrate.

It's too comfortable here, and too many lights.

Got your flashlight?

I was kidding, but you do! You remembered!

Stick it in your trap so you'll stop bullshitting

and bothering yourself.

Everyone say a prayer that this third one works.

Priest's orders.

To which god? We've got several faiths here.

Each to his own, maybe one of them will listen.

It'll improve our chances.

Who do you pray to?

To myself, for example, I'm a Greek Orthodox Catholic.

If you're a believer, then I'm a Spaniard!

This isn't the place for ideological disputes.

Red is a Greek, you're a Spaniard, and that's it.

But...

Shut the fuck up!

They ought to be working instead of having that idiotic conversation.

It's from fear, they can't handle the tension of the moment.

For them, this safe is like the battle of Stoczek for you.

But I'll be quiet.

He we go!

Shipping order.

Shipment to Berlin on May 29...

- What's today's date? - May 28.

Just in time.

This was all planned. We waited till they packed it up.

Open it.

How much can one bar be worth?

Who knows?

I see I screwed myself. I could've demanded more.

Take care of the loading. Turn the trucks around.

Yes sir.

Mr. Kite

let the difference be your donation to our homeland.

I have no choice.

But I'd like to have a word with you.

Ever seen so much loot? The krauts will cry!

It's all going to buy weapons.

Something's going on. SS men, and the safe's open.

They've probably come for the deposit.

But they speak Polish.

Fishy.

Wake the girls, but quietly.

Idiot!

Get up!

Again?

You sluts! We'll talk later, Helen!

If you worked where Helen does

you'd crave a little tenderness too.

We just tell each other

bedtime stories.

Demanding 50,000 bucks I knew I might come out being a fool

but a deal's a deal.

However, maybe you could consider the money at the cashiers

as my commission.

Those are deposits of civilians and awkward for you to confiscate.

Drop 'em!

Whoever moves first, dies.

I'll count to three.

If you don't drop your weapons, we're going to shoot.

I'm not armed.

Don't risk creating an international scandal

by shooting a diplomat from a friendly power.

Allow me to introduce myself.

Don Alfonso von Messerschmitt.

I am the Spanish cousin of your airplane builder.

Our common ancestor was Max von Zeppelin.

Allow me to kiss your hand.

What do you plan to shoot me with? This 1884 model Mauser?

I defended emperor Franz Jozef with one of these.

Does it still fire? Is it loaded?

Just as I thought, empty.

Look here

this pretty face wants to kill this good-looking guy!

Wouldn't that be a shame? Why not go out with him?

Besides, he's in no danger. Your gun's not loaded either.

No...

Really?

Didn't I tell you?

But that's no reason for tears. Drop your weapons...

Disarm and lock up these women.

The army's full of holes!

I did forget to order them to ''lock and load.''

It's like forgetting to salt the potatoes.

Get busy and carry out these crates.

Well.

Shall we go?

Time for a walk, my little one.

What's this?

You rascals, you cretins! Pulling pranks in time of war?

Move this wardrobe, you animals!

Pumpernikel, you swine, I'm ordering you to let me out!

Get your asses in the car!

Soon you'll be riding trams again.

Red's turning back; something must have happened.

His motorcycle probably broke down again.

Krzywy and Prosty, go back for him.

If he was stopped by a patrol, liquidate it.

But don't use your guns.

Sorry buddy, but we'll get the brig if we're late.

And me?

They'll hang me!

I think he went to buy some smokes.

No, something smells fishy here.

Keep an eye on the cabbie while I look around.

You look like a real killer. But I've got the vest on.

It wouldn't have helped you then if I hadn't shoot blanks.

OK.

The goods are on their way home, but they'll be hard to get.

I gave you money for men. What are you pulling?

Your men are just punks; these guys are real commandoes

trained by our son of a bitch

agent in Scotland. Our boys won't match them.

What do you want me to do, report them to the commander?

We won't get shit that way. They won't pay us a finder's fee.

Great, but will you make it in time?

I've got a train to Warsaw in five minutes.

I know where to look for a guy. Maybe he won't be too drunk.

We'll ambush them near Radom.

There where our boys are. They can help unload the truck

then we'll kill them so there won't be any witnesses.

Gotta go or else they'll notice I'm not with them.

Can you overtake him by a minute?

- Where's he going? - To Piotrkowska Road.

No problem, we'll take a back road.

Don't shoot, it's us!

- Who's going to pay me? - Anybody got any change?

I'll...

Don't, he's a Pole. Give him some gasoline.

What some?

You could've broken my windshield!

Ungrateful SOB!

Let's go.

Word of honor?

Red never even left the city.

My men saw him with that informer Pisur

who he supposedly killed.

Who the hell knows.

I think I do.

I see him. What are your orders?

Don't lose sight of the SOB. If he tries to leave, shoot him.

Bad carburetor!

While they were robbing the safe, these cretins blocked me in.

It wasn't us!

You will all be shot!

They had a Spanish general with them.

Get this drunk out of here or I'll have to kill him myself!

A Spanish general? Delirium, delirium.

General? So it wasn't an illusion.

I also saw a general from an operetta.

You will all be arrested.

Sound the alarm! Track them down immediately!

- How many kilometers to go? - About 130 by road to Radom.

Not more than 100 as the crow flies.

- How much time do we have? - Three and a half hours.

Stretch break!

Empty those bladders!

Ladies on the right, gents on the left.

The guy who invents an engine that runs on piss will win a Nobel.

Drivers, gas up. The rest of you fall in!

Gentlemen

the worst is behind us

but we must still get our load home.

I'm sure the Germans are chasing us.

That's why we must be ready for anything.

When we shoot, aim at their heads

because they'll be wearing bullet-proof vests.

Oh yes...

From how far away can a revolver shoot through a vest like that?

Anyone.

Red?

From how far away?

Don't know.

How far away were you when you shot Pisur?

Don't recall.

You stuck the barrel almost against his chest.

Arrest him!

Seat him so he doesn't run. He'll sing for us.

Before you hang, I'm going to cut your balls off for Basia.

Did she say how good it was?

I hate crudeness!

Listen!

- Hear that? - What?

Listen again.

In the vehicles!

- Let's take care of him now. - We'll have time.

How'd you know those women's weapons weren't loaded?

I didn't, I was bluffing. Bluffing is the spice of life.

How about a game of poker tonight.

Afew more kilometers and we'll be in Hungary.

They have to come this way.

- Maybe they already have! - No way, too slow.

We'll wait and if they don't come, we'll go further.

OK.

There they are. Now we'll take care of them!

Hit the personnel carrier first.

Don't shoot the truck, that's where the loot is!

I'll fix the rider.

That's Red!

One less to split it with.

What about loyalty?

Mine ends with you, for now.

- It's not Red. - So what?

This isn't the convoy, it's the Germans.

Stop, you bastard, wait

don't leave me here!

Bye Benedek!

See you after the war!

Benedek! Aim better, you idiot!

That takes the cake! Prepare the artillery!

Set up the gun!

Chudej, over here!

Load!

Set the sights, 15/08.

Fire!

LUNNI ESTATE NEAR WOLKOWYSKO JUNE, 1943

What time are you picking me up tomorrow?

05.00 AM.

Don't be late of the general will put you in a fighter

and the Russians will shoot you down tomorrow over Smolensk.

I'll be on time.

And don't catch the clap in Bialystok.

I'm pleased to report that the cars contained what was promised.

The same as your truck. A pleasure doing business with you.

Our two nations have been friends for a long time.

Your operation is becoming legendary already.

I'd like to meet one of those brave people.

I knew a brave Pole years ago.

Maybe someday I'll be able to introduce you to them.

Gentlemen, drinks...

I too am benefiting, as Fulvio brings excellent cognacs.

It's sheer pleasure for me. Please accept one more gift.

These cigars will last you till the end of the war.

To the end of the war?

In that case, I'd have preferred one, small box.

Let's drink to war's end.

DOMINICAN MAONASTERY IN X... SUMMER, 194...

Did you put aside some money for our tickets to Pernambuco?

Of course, Silbermann. We sail as soon as the war ends

and don't return to Europe until

people here learn to live without wars.

Kite...

What do they speak there?

I don't know, Portuguese, Spanish?

Sara

Miss Olenka...

Don't tap dance so much or you'll get overheated.

I won the ring toss.

Miss Olenka, do you speak Spanish or Portuguese?

No.

Too bad.

Sara has to learn those languages.

She has a lot of subjects and she's learning French.

Brother porter has taught me some new steps.

Brother cook says the meal is served.

Coming.

Why are you hiding, as of you were sneaking up on us?

Eavesdropping?

I'll cut your ears off too!

I won't any more, just don't cut anything else off!

Don't wrinkle! What's for dinner?

Bean soup.

Bean soup ... la Jokai. Benedek gave me the recipe.

I have some plum brandy.

Kosher?

No, Catholic; I swiped it from the prior while we were playing chess.

For winning.

Who ever heard of a Catholic beating a Jew at chess?!

It's the end of the world.

I think you're right.

Everything's topsy-turvy. That's how it must be

because now everything in the world will have to be changed

so that it can again be as it once was.

Let's go have dinner.

English Subtitles by Roger Domagalski

Subtitles by Adam Szostak