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1
00:00:01,131 --> 00:00:03,090
But some lives
change on a dime.
2
00:00:03,090 --> 00:00:06,528
[ Coin rattles ]
3
00:00:06,528 --> 00:00:08,312
I've never
really believed in God,
4
00:00:08,312 --> 00:00:13,361
but recently I managed to summon
almost superhuman strength.
5
00:00:13,361 --> 00:00:16,103
Two days ago, I witnessed
an auto accident.
6
00:00:16,103 --> 00:00:18,757
A taxi flipped over,
and there was a 3-year-old
7
00:00:18,757 --> 00:00:19,889
pinned underneath.
8
00:00:19,889 --> 00:00:21,543
I don't know where the power
came from,
9
00:00:21,543 --> 00:00:24,111
but I got down on the cement,
10
00:00:24,111 --> 00:00:27,418
and I managed
to do 900 push-ups.
11
00:00:27,418 --> 00:00:29,855
I don't consider myself a hero.
12
00:00:29,855 --> 00:00:32,554
I just did what any ripped
specimen of jacked man-meat
13
00:00:32,554 --> 00:00:34,599
would've done in that situation.
14
00:00:34,599 --> 00:00:36,775
I held a pretty sweet pose
until the coroner arrived
15
00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:39,430
to throw the boy in the trash
and ask for my autograph.
16
00:00:39,430 --> 00:00:41,650
I just...
17
00:00:41,650 --> 00:00:44,348
I don't understand
how I got so huge!
18
00:00:44,348 --> 00:00:46,785
I mean, check my 'bliques.
19
00:00:46,785 --> 00:00:49,658
They shredded.
20
00:00:49,658 --> 00:00:51,877
Father? Father?
21
00:00:51,877 --> 00:00:56,534
You are the new Christ.
22
00:00:56,534 --> 00:00:59,363
The crippled came from the world
over to be healed.
23
00:00:59,363 --> 00:01:02,584
Indeed, each time he showed them
his chiseled beef,
24
00:01:02,584 --> 00:01:05,891
miraculously,
they died psyched.
25
00:01:05,891 --> 00:01:07,589
♪♪
26
00:01:07,589 --> 00:01:12,942
Eyes once blind saw glory,
ears once deaf now pounded.
27
00:01:12,942 --> 00:01:15,901
Even...had their problem fixed.
28
00:01:15,901 --> 00:01:18,687
Blimey now, come quick!
It's alive!
29
00:01:18,687 --> 00:01:20,297
[ Whoosh! ]
30
00:01:25,389 --> 00:01:27,391
Hunky Messiah renowned us.
31
00:01:27,391 --> 00:01:31,091
We're all beef in our souls
where it counts.
32
00:01:32,701 --> 00:01:37,184
♪♪
33
00:01:37,184 --> 00:01:42,276
♪♪
34
00:01:42,276 --> 00:01:46,932
That being said, humans have
an animal need to connect.
35
00:01:46,932 --> 00:01:51,807
♪♪
36
00:01:51,807 --> 00:01:53,417
[ Phone rings ]
37
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:54,853
Woman:
Ugh, thank God you picked up.
38
00:01:54,853 --> 00:01:57,291
I'm having literally
the worst day ever.
39
00:01:57,291 --> 00:01:59,771
So at lunch today, Hannah said
she couldn't have brunch
40
00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:02,470
with me tomorrow because she's
having brunch with Bethany,
41
00:02:02,470 --> 00:02:03,775
but Bethany
she couldn't brunch with me
42
00:02:03,775 --> 00:02:05,951
because she's brunching
with Hannah,
43
00:02:05,951 --> 00:02:08,432
so then when I confronted them,
they said they don't think so,
44
00:02:08,432 --> 00:02:10,086
but other people think
I'm pissy trash,
45
00:02:10,086 --> 00:02:12,088
but, like, you don't
think that, do you?
46
00:02:12,088 --> 00:02:13,872
'Cause if you say, "Yes,"
then literally I will die
47
00:02:13,872 --> 00:02:17,006
because this is already, like,
the most literal day of my life!
48
00:02:17,006 --> 00:02:19,617
Man: Li Quin Gwang was desperate
to say
49
00:02:19,617 --> 00:02:22,316
how lucky she felt to gab
with a new gal pal,
50
00:02:22,316 --> 00:02:24,796
but she couldn't get
a word in edgewise,
51
00:02:24,796 --> 00:02:27,321
so she used the new app.
52
00:02:27,321 --> 00:02:32,195
[ Speaking indistinctly ]
53
00:02:32,195 --> 00:02:35,764
Once given the chance to speak,
Ms. Gwang wondered
54
00:02:35,764 --> 00:02:38,549
if any language was rich enough
to convey her depth
55
00:02:38,549 --> 00:02:41,552
of appreciation
for this fellowship.
56
00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:45,730
She hoped silence would suffice.
57
00:02:45,730 --> 00:02:47,558
But it's like I don't even know
if I like brunch,
58
00:02:47,558 --> 00:02:48,820
but I wish you and me
could brunch sometime.
59
00:02:48,820 --> 00:02:51,562
And at that moment,
Ms. Gwang realized
60
00:02:51,562 --> 00:02:54,043
how she too could be literal.
61
00:02:54,043 --> 00:02:56,393
[ Speaking indistinctly ]
62
00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:04,401
♪♪
63
00:03:04,401 --> 00:03:06,621
She was ready for brunch.
64
00:03:06,621 --> 00:03:10,712
Ah!
65
00:03:10,712 --> 00:03:14,368
To bust with life
was Jay Reese's thickest wish,
66
00:03:14,368 --> 00:03:16,021
but he felt so dead
in his heart.
67
00:03:16,021 --> 00:03:18,459
His chest was swarmed
by coffin worms
68
00:03:18,459 --> 00:03:22,245
desperate to wriggle in
for the feast of their lives.
69
00:03:22,245 --> 00:03:25,161
It might smell dead
in there now, fellas,
70
00:03:25,161 --> 00:03:27,207
but not after tonight.
71
00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:28,512
[ Spray hisses ]
72
00:03:28,512 --> 00:03:31,254
[ Elevator bell dings ]
73
00:03:31,254 --> 00:03:34,301
I'm here for a pick-up.
Reese.
74
00:03:34,301 --> 00:03:37,391
Reese, Reese.
[ Clucks tongue ]
75
00:03:37,391 --> 00:03:39,697
You had us recreate your old
high-school crush, right?
76
00:03:39,697 --> 00:03:41,873
Bring out the custom job
for Reese!
77
00:03:41,873 --> 00:03:43,701
Man:
Reese had no photos,
78
00:03:43,701 --> 00:03:46,269
so they had to construct her
from his description.
79
00:03:46,269 --> 00:03:50,055
All they told him was to imagine
a desert choked dead
80
00:03:50,055 --> 00:03:54,277
by a 1,000-year drought and that
she was the first spring rain.
81
00:03:54,277 --> 00:03:57,237
Exactly as pretty
as I remember.
82
00:03:57,237 --> 00:03:58,673
Yep, she ought to be
working nice.
83
00:03:58,673 --> 00:04:01,502
We took her out
for a test spin,
84
00:04:01,502 --> 00:04:03,765
put up a couple few miles
on her, right?
85
00:04:03,765 --> 00:04:05,636
Oh, okay.
86
00:04:05,636 --> 00:04:06,855
Thanks.
87
00:04:06,855 --> 00:04:08,857
Vroom, vroom,
right, Mr. Reese?
88
00:04:08,857 --> 00:04:10,119
Yeah, I guess.
89
00:04:10,119 --> 00:04:11,729
You guess what?
90
00:04:11,729 --> 00:04:14,297
Uh, uh, I, um...
Vroom, vroom.
91
00:04:14,297 --> 00:04:16,560
If you say so.
Okay. We're all set.
92
00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,520
And, uh, did you want
dignity with that?
93
00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:20,782
Like, what?
94
00:04:20,782 --> 00:04:23,567
Dignity, do you want
any dignity?
95
00:04:23,567 --> 00:04:25,569
We can put a look of dignity
in her eyes
96
00:04:25,569 --> 00:04:27,571
or just keep
the blank stare.
97
00:04:27,571 --> 00:04:31,227
Uh, is the, um,
dignity extra?
98
00:04:31,227 --> 00:04:32,576
Fifty cents more.
99
00:04:32,576 --> 00:04:38,103
Uh, I'm on
a philosopher's salary.
100
00:04:38,103 --> 00:04:39,453
I understand.
101
00:04:39,453 --> 00:04:42,238
This guy doesn't want
any dignity.
102
00:04:42,238 --> 00:04:44,545
No dignity for Jay Reese!
103
00:04:44,545 --> 00:04:46,024
And you're in luck.
104
00:04:46,024 --> 00:04:47,809
We're running a special promo
this month.
105
00:04:47,809 --> 00:04:49,724
Every custom
love doll you buy,
106
00:04:49,724 --> 00:04:52,466
we throw in a free doll
of your mother.
107
00:04:52,466 --> 00:04:53,989
Bring out the mom
on the Reese job!
108
00:04:53,989 --> 00:04:56,252
-Ah!
-It's Eudora Reese!
109
00:04:56,252 --> 00:04:58,559
-No, I don't want --
-Looks just like her, huh?
110
00:04:58,559 --> 00:05:01,039
Our team really does
their research.
111
00:05:01,039 --> 00:05:03,868
You can do anything
you want with her.
112
00:05:03,868 --> 00:05:05,914
Get me? Anything.
113
00:05:05,914 --> 00:05:09,178
Ew. I don't want to do sex
with Mommy.
114
00:05:09,178 --> 00:05:12,050
Who said anything about sex?
What's wrong with you?
115
00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:13,574
S-Sorry.
116
00:05:13,574 --> 00:05:15,619
I don't know what I'm supposed
to do with this.
117
00:05:15,619 --> 00:05:17,795
Punch her, strangling,
whatever you're into!
118
00:05:17,795 --> 00:05:20,058
Go on!
Sock her in the teeth.
119
00:05:20,058 --> 00:05:21,495
Break her in.
120
00:05:21,495 --> 00:05:23,845
Vroom, vroom, right,
like how you said.
121
00:05:23,845 --> 00:05:25,977
I'm not -- I would never
hurt my mom.
122
00:05:25,977 --> 00:05:27,588
Not true.
123
00:05:27,588 --> 00:05:29,372
You're breaking her heart
right now.
124
00:05:29,372 --> 00:05:30,634
See?
125
00:05:30,634 --> 00:05:32,157
Her eyes are totally wet
for you.
126
00:05:32,157 --> 00:05:35,987
Oh, she's a squirter!
127
00:05:35,987 --> 00:05:40,209
Ooh, oh, why do you have her
making noises like that?
128
00:05:40,209 --> 00:05:43,038
Oh, yeah, she's programmed
to say
129
00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:45,170
all the real stuff
your mom says.
130
00:05:45,170 --> 00:05:46,650
Oh, yeah, honey.
131
00:05:46,650 --> 00:05:48,652
Can I make you an egg-salad
sandwich, baby?
132
00:05:48,652 --> 00:05:52,439
Mm, that'll put some meat
on your bones.
133
00:05:52,439 --> 00:05:54,484
-Mm!
-Ugh, god!
134
00:05:54,484 --> 00:05:56,660
When are you going
to give me some grandchildren?
135
00:05:56,660 --> 00:05:58,575
Ugh, yeah, give it to me!
136
00:05:58,575 --> 00:05:59,837
Give me grandchildren!
137
00:05:59,837 --> 00:06:01,230
Make me a grandma!
Do it!
138
00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:03,624
No, no, no, no, no, no!
I can't hear this!
139
00:06:03,624 --> 00:06:05,408
Make her stop!
-Of course.
140
00:06:05,408 --> 00:06:06,975
I've got something
for that.
141
00:06:06,975 --> 00:06:08,672
Oh, honey.
142
00:06:08,672 --> 00:06:10,805
Cancel the whole thing!
It's all ruined!
143
00:06:10,805 --> 00:06:12,546
Uh, Mike, uh, hey,
I'm sorry.
144
00:06:12,546 --> 00:06:14,069
I didn't mean
to upset you.
145
00:06:14,069 --> 00:06:16,550
Tell you what, take it.
The mom is free.
146
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:18,421
It's not about the money.
I'm going.
147
00:06:18,421 --> 00:06:20,075
No, I mean, it's free.
148
00:06:20,075 --> 00:06:21,337
It has free will.
149
00:06:21,337 --> 00:06:23,600
It wants to come
with you!
150
00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,341
Oh, I'm coming!
Oh, yeah!
151
00:06:25,341 --> 00:06:27,343
I'm coming!
152
00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:29,258
No, Mom!
I don't want it!
153
00:06:29,258 --> 00:06:30,912
Go on! Get!
154
00:06:30,912 --> 00:06:33,697
Mm!
155
00:06:33,697 --> 00:06:35,917
Fine.
Let's go, Mom.
156
00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:38,485
Man: Reese knew, every time
he got a girl,
157
00:06:38,485 --> 00:06:40,791
his mom would find
a way to ruin it.
158
00:06:40,791 --> 00:06:43,141
I guess you'll
sleep in here.
159
00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:44,142
Why don't you wash up?
160
00:06:44,142 --> 00:06:45,492
I'll fix supper.
-Mm.
161
00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:48,364
After that, Reese was too
ashamed to see
162
00:06:48,364 --> 00:06:52,281
his real mom again,
so he began to lean on this one.
163
00:06:52,281 --> 00:06:55,110
[ Knock on door ]
164
00:06:55,110 --> 00:06:58,113
The original mother simply
couldn't imagine
165
00:06:58,113 --> 00:07:02,813
what she had done to make
her child reject her so coldly,
166
00:07:02,813 --> 00:07:06,121
but his doll was determined
not to feel guilty.
167
00:07:06,121 --> 00:07:08,515
It wasn't her fault that woman
couldn't manage
168
00:07:08,515 --> 00:07:10,952
to keep her own son loyal,
169
00:07:10,952 --> 00:07:13,911
so they settled into
a cozy companionship --
170
00:07:13,911 --> 00:07:16,610
long afternoons
connecting over tea
171
00:07:16,610 --> 00:07:18,176
with an ease
between them,
172
00:07:18,176 --> 00:07:21,397
although her prayers
often kept him up at night.
173
00:07:21,397 --> 00:07:23,747
Oh, God, oh, yeah, God.
174
00:07:23,747 --> 00:07:27,055
Oh, God.
oh, yeah, God, baby.
175
00:07:27,055 --> 00:07:28,404
Oh, yeah, God, baby.
176
00:07:28,404 --> 00:07:31,059
Oh, God,
yeah, God, baby.
177
00:07:31,059 --> 00:07:34,149
Yeah, God, baby, yeah, God,
baby, yeah, God, baby!
178
00:07:34,149 --> 00:07:36,151
And when he finally woke,
of course,
179
00:07:36,151 --> 00:07:39,415
she laid
quite a humongous egg.
180
00:07:40,764 --> 00:07:44,681
[ Squeaking ]
181
00:07:44,681 --> 00:07:46,901
The baby moms scampered
everywhere,
182
00:07:46,901 --> 00:07:48,859
dispensing kind advice
183
00:07:48,859 --> 00:07:51,688
and leaving tiny casseroles
around the house.
184
00:07:51,688 --> 00:07:54,169
They were competitive critters
who did favors
185
00:07:54,169 --> 00:07:55,910
and tricks
to prove their love
186
00:07:55,910 --> 00:07:58,216
without asking for anything
in return
187
00:07:58,216 --> 00:08:01,350
and spent all day
making squeaks that meant,
188
00:08:01,350 --> 00:08:03,570
"I don't need anything,
so don't worry about me
189
00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:05,006
because I don't want
to make trouble,
190
00:08:05,006 --> 00:08:06,877
and you can ignore me
if you like
191
00:08:06,877 --> 00:08:08,879
because all I want
is for you to be happy.
192
00:08:08,879 --> 00:08:10,707
Even though my leg hurts,
it's not a big deal,
193
00:08:10,707 --> 00:08:13,797
and I don't matter
because I'm just a mom."
194
00:08:13,797 --> 00:08:16,104
If he dared to help them
in any way,
195
00:08:16,104 --> 00:08:18,585
they'd break
into cute little riots.
196
00:08:18,585 --> 00:08:20,891
[ Squeaking and crashing ]
197
00:08:20,891 --> 00:08:22,545
[ Knock on door ]
-Exterminator.
198
00:08:22,545 --> 00:08:25,287
Uh, I didn't
call anyone.
199
00:08:25,287 --> 00:08:27,332
Exterminator!
200
00:08:27,332 --> 00:08:29,247
Dad, what are you
doing here?
201
00:08:29,247 --> 00:08:31,815
I have no idea what
you're talking about.
202
00:08:31,815 --> 00:08:35,427
I'm just a regular
exterminator, okay?
203
00:08:35,427 --> 00:08:38,039
Now you put a tiny Bible
here for bait.
204
00:08:38,039 --> 00:08:41,695
They crawl in, and snap
goes their nagging neck.
205
00:08:41,695 --> 00:08:43,348
I don't
want to hurt them.
206
00:08:43,348 --> 00:08:47,701
Aw, let me just do a couple
of them, please, please.
207
00:08:47,701 --> 00:08:49,267
For the first time
in his life,
208
00:08:49,267 --> 00:08:53,663
Reese understood how to give
his father what he truly wanted.
209
00:08:53,663 --> 00:08:55,839
Sure, Pop,
right through there.
210
00:08:55,839 --> 00:08:58,146
[ Baby moms squeaking ]
[ Bones crack ]
211
00:08:58,146 --> 00:08:59,408
Thank you.
212
00:08:59,408 --> 00:09:01,192
[ Thud ]
213
00:09:04,065 --> 00:09:06,415
He realized these sweet
creatures could help
214
00:09:06,415 --> 00:09:10,593
so many others not lucky enough
to know a mother's touch.
215
00:09:15,076 --> 00:09:17,513
This gave him the confidence
that he was ready
216
00:09:17,513 --> 00:09:21,865
to find a real partner,
maybe even get married.
217
00:09:21,865 --> 00:09:23,867
Unfortunately,
at that exact moment,
218
00:09:23,867 --> 00:09:26,304
the queen mother just happened
to grow old
219
00:09:26,304 --> 00:09:30,395
as a total coincidence and not
as an emotional manipulation.
220
00:09:30,395 --> 00:09:32,310
As her health deteriorated,
221
00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:34,530
he was strangely grateful
for the chance to care
222
00:09:34,530 --> 00:09:38,012
for the person who had nurtured
him when he was helpless.
223
00:09:38,012 --> 00:09:40,101
He couldn't help
but see an elegance
224
00:09:40,101 --> 00:09:42,756
to the full circle shape
our lives take.
225
00:09:42,756 --> 00:09:46,455
He was with her at the end
when she slipped into infinity.
226
00:09:46,455 --> 00:09:49,240
It's so big. Ah!
227
00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:51,199
Let it in.
228
00:09:51,199 --> 00:09:54,028
-Big.
-Relax. Let it in.
229
00:09:54,028 --> 00:09:56,465
Oh!
230
00:09:56,465 --> 00:09:58,902
The first time he brought
a woman to completion,
231
00:09:58,902 --> 00:10:00,469
his heart throbbed to life.
232
00:10:00,469 --> 00:10:03,124
His coffin worms were thrilled
for their brunch,
233
00:10:03,124 --> 00:10:05,866
but Reese missed the warmth
of his little friends
234
00:10:05,866 --> 00:10:08,259
as they ate away
at all things death,
235
00:10:08,259 --> 00:10:10,566
chomping a path
he'd be crazy enough to follow.
236
00:10:10,566 --> 00:10:12,829
You're so tight.
237
00:10:12,829 --> 00:10:15,049
He was ready
for his brunch.
238
00:10:18,835 --> 00:10:20,924
Excuse me.
Can I get a water here, Miss?
239
00:10:20,924 --> 00:10:24,014
Holly Inglet had
quite enough messes.
240
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:29,324
Didn't you go to Bantam
High School?
241
00:10:29,324 --> 00:10:31,935
So the day he finally felt rain
on his face
242
00:10:31,935 --> 00:10:33,807
after a 1,000-year drought,
243
00:10:33,807 --> 00:10:35,635
Reese raised
her the whole world,
244
00:10:37,724 --> 00:10:40,509
and no matter how hard
his old friends
245
00:10:40,509 --> 00:10:42,729
begged him to visit them
for tea,
246
00:10:42,729 --> 00:10:47,168
he never set foot on the ground
again, not after tonight.
247
00:10:47,168 --> 00:10:49,692
♪ There's blood in the kitchen
248
00:10:49,692 --> 00:10:52,826
♪ There's blood in the hall
249
00:10:52,826 --> 00:10:58,962
♪ There's blood in the parlor
where my lady did fall ♪
250
00:10:58,962 --> 00:11:05,142
♪ Long Lankin was hanged
on a gibbet so high ♪
251
00:11:05,142 --> 00:11:10,800
♪ And the false nurse was burned
in a fire close by ♪
18551
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