Original subtitles

Seven. That did it. This time I'm shooting five.

- I've got one. - You've paid ahead.

Here we go. Come on. Let's show them how many days are in a week.

Snake eyes, jump up and bite him.

Eight she is. Eighter from Decatur. A working mars point.

- Do we ride or are we walking? - Finkelstein is hot.

Come on, baby. Let's get over the hump this time.

- Here we go. Eight she is. - Seven she is.

- Shoot the deuce. - Come on tootsie, work for papa.

Why, you double crossing, sawed off hunk of elephants tusks.

- What's the idea? - Sorry, you know the regulations.

Since when did you start giving orders in this outfit?

Maybe you're scared of those rats bellied goose steppers down there.

I'm not afraid, but I don't think that we should underestimate them.

Who's underestimating them?

Do you think they need a map for that cockeyed moon tailing us?

And from now on, keep your nose out of my business.

- Take it easy. He didn't mean it. - Who does he think he is.

- Alright. - That accent is like a hiney to me.

Pete, with you, everything's gotta be an argument. Don't be silly.

Max is American, alright? He speaks just as good as English as me.

What's a fella like him doing in this outfit anyway?

You seem to know him pretty well, Moe. Who is he?

Well, it's kind of like my old pal, Father O'Grady used to say:

The saints would sooner throw a block party for a straightened out guy...

than for ninety and nine right guys that don't need no straightening out.

I met him a few months before we entered the war.

It was in...

maybe I'd better not tell you the name of the town. Let's say it was...

somewhere on the east coast of the United States.

See, the mayor of the town was a great little kidder.

Send in Solomon and Finkelstein.

- Ok, you two. Go on in. - Yes, sir.

- Hi, Greenberg. - Hi, Finkelstein.

Hi, Rosenblatt.

- Finkelstein reporting, sir. - Solomon reporting, sir.

Hello. How would you like a vacation from that graveyard beat you're on?

- The longer the better. - Suits me if you make it permanent.

- I'm transferring you to the battery. - The battery? That's a swell spot.

- Oh, sure. - To patrol the German consulate...

to prevent the inciting of any riot or demonstration and to see that...

no harm comes to the members of the staff specifically to Karl Baumer...

the German Counsel General. You'll work alternating shifts.

- You'll work first, Finkelstein. - Yes, sir.

Solomon? The Nazi counsel.

- So what? - So what?

Solomon, you, me, the Nazi.

Send in Kapitsky and Poland.

Wait a minute.

Excuse me, Captain, but did you say the German counsel?

That's right.

I won't do it.

Put that shield back where it belongs.

You could be busted for doing that. Now put it back.

I just can't do it, Captain. I'd cut off my right arm for the department...

do a 36 hour tour in the rain, but I just can't protect a dirty Nazi.

Come here.

You see those buttons?

By tonight there'll be 3OO of you boys protecting...

the lives and property of Germans.

Bund members, camps, club halls.

- You know how we feel. How you... - Orders. Straight from the mayor.

- He expects every cop to do his duty. - Duty? You call that duty?

When in our hearts, we hope they should all break their necks...

from Hitler to Baumer to the littlest Nazi rat in Yorkville.

Berlin has complained to Washington about demonstrations in our cities.

So, a few Nazi windows were broken in travel agencies.

The mayor wants them to be safe, as long we're neutral...

A great little guy, our mayor. He's got a sense of humor.

He wants you to teach the Nazis the difference between their system...

...and our democratic free country. - Hizzoner's a great guy alright...

...but his sense of humor stinks. - Finkelstein!

Free country. Free speech.

Okay. Now, come on. Get on the job.

It's like asking to sit down and break bread with Hitler.

I'm a cop not a storm trooper.

- A cop doesn't fall down on his job. - But you...

In this country a cop gives everybody a break...

no matter how he feels.

3315. Magillacutty wore this. He was killed in action.

Now, you know the tradition.

A dead hero's shield goes to the most promising cop.

Now, you're not going to disgrace 3315...

are you?

No, sir.

But mama won't like it.

Heil Hitler.

Good morning. Patrolman Finkelstein. I'm assigned to duty here.

Wait here.

Yes, Fritz?

The new policeman, Finkelstein, is here, Baron.

Ask him to wait. I'll tell the counsel.

Yes, sir.

Jewish policemen to guard this consulate.

If I were Hitler, I'd break off diplomatic relations.

- Then, you'd be out of a job, Otto. - What do you mean?

Without diplomatic relations, there would be no American F�hrer.

Baron, you're talking like one of those stupid columnists.

Our Bund has no connection with the German government.

Are your reports for Berlin ready?

- Everything. - Good.

The dispatch leaves tomorrow at midnight.

This is a list of new memberships and pamphlets distributed...

to libraries, labor halls and waiting rooms.

We've done very well in dentist's offices.

People tend to leave them in a frame of mind for our messages...

and my new budget of Bund expenses, Baron. I'm very low on funds.

The counsel gave you US$25 thousand last month.

- No, he didn't. - He didn't?

No, and I must have money to pay for these new uniforms.

Who told you to buy new uniforms?

Well, I've got to do something to get my picture in the papers.

Alright. I'll speak to the counsel about it.

Wait here.

Oh, you're the new man.

- Are you the counsel? - No, I'm Baron von Alvenstor...

his secretary. Do you know your duties?

- Well, positively. - I'll tell the counsel...

that you've reported.

Baron...

is he really as bad as they say he is?

You won't find the counsel difficult if you don't antagonize him.

Thank you.

Baron...

...are you a Nazi? - Naturally.

- What's so naturally about it? - You'll excuse me.

- Oh, Fritz? - Yes, sir?

- Will you show the officer around? - Yes, sir.

Well, let's go, thin-blood.

This way.

- Good morning, Frieda. - Good morning, Herr Counselor.

Good morning. These stubborn, stupid English.

Can't they get anything through their thick heads?

I'll bet you that the F�hrer will have dinner in Buckingham in 3 weeks.

- Ridiculous. - Shut up, Churchill.

Ridiculous.

- Did the dispatch from Berlin come? - Yes, sir.

Otto Horst is downstairs. He wants his money.

- I gave him US$25,OOO last month. - He says you didn't.

That's right. I put it off until I see his new budget.

How could Berlin have chosen such a dumbkoff for our American F�hrer?

As a teacher at Midwestern high school, he was extremely valuable...

in advancing the ideology of national socialism to the American students.

- Anything from Schroeder yet? - No.

Has he been investigating somebody for you again?

Max, sometimes you're too curious.

I never thought of myself as unduly curious.

Perhaps it's an Austrian trait.

As far as I know, I inerited nothing from my Viennese grandmother.

How can we know what we inerit from our grandparents...

if we know so little about them? Any money?

- Yes. US$5O thousand. - US$5O thousand?

What am I to do with US$5O thousand?

Take care of Horst, secure confidential information...

buy off American journalists and radio commentators?

Next, Berlin will order me to corrupt Walter Winchell...

with an autographed picture of Hitler.

Special delivery.

Look here, sir. We've got to get together...

on the finances of the consulate. I can't make the books balance.

You're not supposed to keep books. Books are dangerous.

I keep the figures in my head. That's why Berlin sent me.

I hope I've made a mistake, but I make a shortage of US$25O thousand.

Those funds belong to our country. You must help me straighten things out.

How can I straighten books out that you keep in your head?

You have to try, sir. I can't delay sending my report to Berlin...

the dispatch leaves tomorrow at midnight.

How charming. I must have a secret admirer.

- Is there no card? - No, Max.

Perhaps they are from a lady, who prefers to remain anonymous.

- Don't eat. They might be poisoned. - Why anyone would poison me?

We Germans are not too popular these days.

They really are beautiful.

- Maybe Mr. Churchill would like one. - No, please. Why take a chance?

Mrs. Farmer is very fond of Mr. Churchill.

- Are you afraid of me, Mr. Churchill? - Ridiculous.

- Good morning. - Good morning, Sophie.

What's the matter with him?

Well, rest in peace, Mr. Churchill.

No, thank you, Frieda.

I'm afraid you were right, Max. The grapes are poisoned.

- You killed him. - I was sent grapes in the mail.

Max warns me they might be poisoned. You want me to try them on myself.

- You could've sent them for analysis. - You did it deliberately.

- You knew I was fond of him. - You can buy another parrot.

And, please, one with a less limited vocabulary.

I got quite bored with Mr. Churchill saying nothing but ridiculous...

ridiculous every time I opened my mouth.

- I hate him. - Sophie.

I can't stand it any longer. I can't go on living with him.

Why do you, Sophie?

You know why I do. My father's still in Prague.

He wouldn't take it out on your father.

Wouldrt he?

- You really don't know him, Max. - I understand how you feel...

but he hasn't had an easy job in his post. He has plenty to worry about.

- Max, you're always so loyal to him. - I'm not loyal to him.

I'm loyal to what he represents.

- The Nazis? - Yes. The Nazis.

- Sophie, is there anything I could do? - No, thank you. I'll be all right.

This is Officer Finkelstein. He'll be on duty instead of Officer Callahan.

Pleased to meet you.

- Mr. Churchill is dead. - What did she say?

- Mr. Churchill is dead. - Winston Churchill?

Yes. He just died upstairs.

When somebody dies, you've got to report it. Churchill? Dead here?

Mr. Churchill is a parrot. Mrs. Baumer's pet parrot.

What happened, Frieda?

- What was that? - Baumer received a box of grapes...

from an anonymous admirer. The parrot got a hold of one.

- Lucky it wasrt Mr. Baumer. - Very.

Sure, a guy like the Counsel ain't exactly popular.

- He ought to watch his diet. - We are very careful.

Nice and pleasant home life you've got here.

- The counsel. - Go ahead, don't mind me.

So, you're Frieda, huh?

That was a fast brush off.

- Tell Horst I'll see him now. - Yes, sir.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

Well, Horst, you get the plans?

I've been busy. The Bund is about to start a new membership drive...

for all American citizens of German blood.

Already, we have five thousand men in uniform in this state.

I asked you if you got the plans.

But that takes time...

...and money. - Money, money, money, money.

My dear man...

I commissioned you to get plans for the defense of the East Coast...

and you make speeches and run around like a chicken with his head cut off.

- But how can you expect? - And by the way...

if you have any complaints about me...

please be good enough to make them to me...

...and not to my secretary. - Yes, sir.

Alright.

And now, Horst, I want you to get me four longshoremen union cards.

By tomorrow morning.

Four of our men are arriving on the Belmont this afternoon...

and I want you to put them to work on the waterfront immediately.

- The waterfront? That's impossible. - I'm not interested in excuses.

All I want is the cards, don't care how you get them or where.

Just get them. That's what we pay you for.

- But I haven't been paid. - Bring the cards in the morning...

and I'll see what I can do. Who is next?

The new policeman. Officer Finkelstein.

Finkelstein. Tell him to come in.

The counsel will see you now, Officer Finkelstein.

Alright, sir.

Come on in, Officer Finkelman.

Finkelstein. Moe Finkelstein.

- Moe Finkelstein. - That's me, brother.

- Begin by not calling me brother. - Just the American way of talking.

- You're no brother of mine, Mister. - Thank you.

Thank your mother. What a break for both of us.

Shut up. Horst, you can go now. I'll see you in the morning.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

Pardon me, sir, but you shouldn't get mixed up with fellas like that.

- What do you mean? - Well...

he's running a racket and that ain't good.

Wrapping himself up in an American flag to make un-american speeches.

Free speech is part of your Constitution.

But when a guy like Horst preaches murder...

there ought to be a constitutional way to give him a military funeral.

- That will do. - I'm telling you that Das Horst...

is heading for the clink, but why should I tip you off? I'm too democratic.

Officer, do you know why you are here?

Sure, Hizzoner the mayor wants you to be happy.

I take it that you don't enjoy being my personal bodyguard.

It's got its merits. Imagine me being responsible for your health.

Where else could a cockeyed thing like that happen except in a democracy?

Do you realize what will happen to you if anything happens to me?

I'll get sacked off the force if a hair on your head gets touched...

...which is why I've got to be careful. - Shut up.

Just holding up my end of the conversation.

Do you have any relatives in Germany?

I come from a very smart family. They left long before Hitler.

All of your core religion in Germany will be hostages for my safety.

Remember what happened to them when Greenspan shot the Secretary...

...of our embassy in Paris. - I know all of the colorful details.

In this country Dillinger and Capone used to pull stunts like that.

You know where they wound up. I'm hoping for the best in your case.

I'll report you for insolence.

I don't wanna start nothing. A grudge against you, I ain't got.

You've done me a favor. You've shown me the difference...

between living in the land of the free and in the land of gangsters.

- Hitler is a genius. - Yeah, but he's a stupid genius.

Maybe I should've gone in the grocery business with uncle Jake.

Frieda.

Oh Frieda, I forgot my gloves.

You've been here over 2 months. You must learn to speak English.

Fritz says not necessary. Come ta tach everyone will sprecten Deutsch.

In the meantime, a little English might come in handy. Get my gloves.

Yes.

Officer. I don't believe I've seen you before. I'm Mrs. Baumer.

Patrolman Finkelstein. A pleasure to meet you.

I'm glad to see you on the job, officer. There may be trouble tomorrow night...

...when Hitler's speech is broadcast. - Don't worry. There won't be trouble...

with me and Solomon on the job.

I'm sure there won't.

- Do you want your car? - No, thank you.

I'm just going around the corner.

Hey, that Mrs. Baumer sure is a swell lady.

No, Dr. Jennings. It's no use.

This won't make me sleep.

I'm not sick. I'm worried. Scared.

Scared of what?

My father's in a concentration camp in Czechoslovakia.

In a concentration camp? Your father?

My father was Czech ambassador in Berlin when I met my husband.

After the Anschluss...

well he's been in a camp over a year and a half now.

But I don't understand. Can't your husband help him?

No. I mean...

I'm afraid I can't explain. Anyway, thank you, doctor.

I have no right to take up your time with my personal problems.

Come here.

Sit down.

Now, tell me.

You've never met my husband.

If you had, you'd probably wonder why I married him.

But he can be very charming when he wants to.

I was young. I'd been brought up in Germany.

Perhaps, I was flattered by the attention of a Nazi official.

At any rate, I soon knew that I had made a mistake.

I told him and asked him to let me go.

At first he just laughed at me.

Then he pleaded with me.

Finally, he threatened me.

You mean he's using your father's plight to make you stay with him?

Yes. Sometimes I've been afraid that I'd kill him.

- That wouldn't help your father. - No.

- Why don't you see a lawyer? - I don't dare.

- You don't dare? - I'm watched constantly and followed.

- I find that hard to believe. - My husband is by the window...

in the library right now spying on me...

waiting for me to come out.

- Are you sure you're not imagining? - Why don't you look?

- Anything from Vienna, yet? - Yes, the letter from Schroeder.

- It just came. - Give it to me.

I said give it to me. Strictly personal.

- Lf it's in code... - It won't be.

Schroeder has a strange notion that codes were invented by spies...

...to give spies employment. - Who is the victim this time?

Why are you so curious, Max?

Lately, sir, anybody that you don't like you expect them of being Jewish.

Forgive me, sir, but it's become rather an obsession.

A rather useful obsession for a smart Nazi.

- Fritz? - Yes, sir?

- Is the car here? - Yes, sir.

Does the letter concern me?

Why should the letter concern you?

See you later, Officer Finkelberg.

The name is Finkelstein. Moe Finkelstein.

Hello.

Say baby, how about heating me a cup of coffee?

- Coffee? - Yeah, coffee.

- Officer Callahan ordered a coffee. - Look out for that Irishman.

- What? - He's married.

- Married? - Yeah, married.

Married. Five little Callahans. More coming.

You know, honey. You're a darn, cute looking kid.

You're beautiful.

Beautiful?

You dames understand that in any language. Don't you?

Yeah, beautiful.

Your eyes, Greta Garbo.

Your shape, Betty Grable. Your mouth, Loretta Young.

Nein. Hedy Lamarr.

Alright, so we'll settle for Lamarr.

Married?

See...

...married? - Who? Me? Heaven forbid.

Mama should hear you say that.

- Your uniform. - Yeah, thanks.

How about you and I going out tomorrow night?

Look, you, me, dinner tomorrow night.

Tomorrow night is Mr. Hitler's radio broadcast.

Don't tell me that you have to get Hitler's permission.

Alright, Saturday night. Seven o'clock.

- Seven o'clock. Good. - First, we'll eat.

- We'll have blintzes, borsht... - Nein. Chop suey.

Alright, chop suey.

- Movies? - Sure, movies.

- Confessions of a Nazi Spy. - Good.

It's a date. Okay?

Vas ist das okay?

Okay is okay.

Okee dokee. Hotsy Totsy. Honky doree.

Alright. Ok. Okay?

- Okay. - Okay.

- Karl, I want to talk to you. - Fritz.

- Why won't you give me a divorce? - This routine is getting boring.

But I'm no longer the slightest use to you. You only married me...

because you thought the daughter of an Ambassador might be useful.

Yes, and for the first time in my life I was a dumbkoff.

To marry a Czech one year before Anschluss.

In Europe now, it's not safe to marry for anything but love.

At the time we married, the jewels I inerited from my mother...

...were valued at a half million dollars. - I used the money to help your father.

- Did you? - Yes. And much more.

Sophia, our finances are in bad shape. The books don't balance.

There's quite a shortage.

What have you done with the money they sent you from Berlin?

- Max is handling the money. - Oh, stop it.

You are. Max can prove that to Berlin.

Yes, but who in Berlin is going to take his word against mine now?

- Now? - Yes, Sophie.

Imagine. Our charming Max's Viennese grandmother was a Jewess.

I have a letter from my agent Schroeder in Vienna.

It's carefully documented.

- Karl, they'll put him in a camp. - It's customary.

But you can't tell him. He couldn't stand it. He might kill himself.

Yes, I know. Sensitive fellow. Only way out and all that.

Thank you.

That would dispose of the shortage and Max.

Good night, Sophie.

Thank you, Officer Fogelstein.

Finkelstein. Moe Finkelstein.

Eight. Black and even.

- Brandy. - Yes, sir.

- US$5 thousand. - US$5 thousand.

- Please Frau Baumer, can I go out? - So late, Frieda?

The young officer wants to take me for a short going.

What?

- Oh, you mean walk. - Yeah, walk.

I thought you didn't like the young officer.

Oh, he's okay.

Okay?

Yeah, okay, okee doke, hunkie dorie, hotsy totsy.

Oh, he must be something.

Alright, go along and have a short going with your young officer.

Thank you, Frau Baumer.

Thirty-one.

US$5 thousand more. I'll sign for it.

- Mr. Lavass. - Alright.

Would you please move away? It might change my luck.

- Put this on eight. - Eight.

- Waiter, another brandy. - Yes, sir.

The number is 29.

Eleven. One more. Take it easy.

Twelve. Say doc, come here.

- She won. - Well, this never happened before.

- Well, it has now. Pay off. - You can have anything in the house.

Did you hear what he said? You can have anything in the house?

Up to thirty-five cents.

Where are you going?

A lipstick.

A lipstick.

You mean you never had one before?

You see, I'm beginning to understand German. She says lipsticks...

...are forbidden in Germany. - That's horrible.

Why? It's the only thing mother would agree with Hitler about.

- That will be $1.18. - A dollar eighteen.

The lipstick was $1.5O. The lady has thirty-five cents coming to her.

The tax is three cents. That makes $1.18.

Okay?

Okay.

Eighteen.

- Come on, honey. - Please, more Coke.

More Coke?

Two more Cherry cokes, please.

Say, I thought you didn't like our national drink.

- I like. - You like? Give yourself a chance.

You'll find a lot of things around here you like...

...and you can start on me. - Okay.

Hello, Solomon.

- Hello. - How's everything going?

Everything is under control. Where have you two been?

- We went to buy a lipstick. - So, I see.

Moe.

If you run along home to the Missus. I don't mind to put in an extra hour.

Arert you the guy who did all the squawking about going on this job?

- Only a fool don't change his mind. - And you ain't no fool, brother.

- Will you learn me to talk English? - Will I?

You just stick to me, and you'll be talking right out of Shakespeare.

Good.

Why does anybody want to learn how to talk? It ain't necessary.

Just like the good old days in Vienna.

Frinklebaum!

- What's going on in here? - Just a quiet little Anschluss...

and the name is Finkelstein. Moe Finkelstein.

- Still working on your report, Max? - It has to be ready tomorrow night.

What a sense of responsibility you have and your head for figures...

- This just came over the wire. - Thank you.

Sophie.

Sophie.

- Yes? - I have news from Berlin.

Bad news.

News from Berlin is always bad news for somebody.

- I've been recalled. - They've finally caught up with you.

They give me 48 hours to get rid of Horst...

and clean up the finances of the consulate.

What? No orders to overthrow the government in Washington?

Sophie, this is serious. You know what will happen to me if I go back.

The Third Reich allows no margin for error.

I ought to say I'm sorry, but I'm not.

Do you think I want to go back to Germany any more than you do?

It is an easier country to serve than to live in just between us.

Perhaps, I won't have to go if you help me.

Help you?

After all, Max is no longer one of us.

I'd rather die than help you ruin Max.

Perhaps, you will die.

Perhaps you'll kill me like you killed the parrot this morning.

- I didn't kill the parrot. - Oh, didn't you?

I found this in your medicine chest. It smells of bitter almonds.

You poisoned the grapes and mailed them to yourself.

I didn't kill the parrot and I won't have to kill you.

- Berlin knows how to handle traitors. - I'm not a traitor.

That can easily be arranged when we arrive in Berlin.

- I'm not going to Berlin. - Then I'll have you deported.

You can't have me deported. My mother was an American. I was born in USA.

Don't forget your father is still in Prague.

I've protected him. He may not be exactly free, but he's alive.

I deserve to die just for living with a swine like you.

I have an affidavit that you will sign...

giving detail about how Max gambled the money belonged to the Reich.

But it's not true. I won't do it.

You will do it and don't try any tricks.

It won't save Max and it certainly wouldn't be so nice for your papa.

I don't care what you do. I'm going to tell Max right away.

Sophie, stop it. Sophie.

Max.

Max.

- Max. - What is it?

Don't believe anything he says. He's trying to make you a scapegoat.

Don't listen to her. She's hysterical.

- Max, please. - Book passage for Sophie immediately.

- I won't go back to Germany. - You're leaving with me.

Stop it, Baumer. I won't have this.

Now, things are going to be the way I want them.

You can't torture her like this. I won't have it.

Very touching. Twist her and desert her.

- That's an amusing angle. - Can't you see she's upset?

Officer, please get Dr. Jennings.

- He's just around the corner. - Yes, sir.

- Anything I can do, Herr Counsel? - Watch them upstairs.

Report to me later.

- Max, what are we going to do? - Don't worry, Sophie. You mustrt.

Max, you must do something before it's too late. You must.

Dr. Jennings.

I'm Baron von Alvenstor.

- The counsel's secretary. - Glad to meet you, Baron.

If I wasrt wearing this uniform I'd knock your boss' brains out.

If he has any.

- Twister. - What was Sophie trying to tell me?

- Can't you guess? - What was in that letter?

Don't you know?

Schroeder can't tell you anything about my Viennese grandmother.

- I've tried to find out myself. - One's blood begins to ask questions.

There is no answer in my blood that I do not belong to Germany...

...or Germany doesn't belong to me. - Isn't there?

For heavers sake, you know I love Germany.

It isn't true.

It can't be.

- I couldn't bear it. - Of course not.

Life would be intolerable. Wouldrt it?

Yes.

Oh, I beg your pardon.

- You're Doctor Jennings, aren't you? - Yes.

Glad to meet you. This is my secretary, Baron von Alvenstor.

- We've met upstairs. - He's a little upset, doctor.

Bad news from Vienna about his grandmother. Drink, doctor?

- Thanks, I don't mind a scotch. - Soda?

- Straight. - I take brandy the same way.

A taste I got in the tropics.

I was consulate in British South Africa.

I gave Mrs. Baumer a sedative. Sleep is the best thing for her.

Poor Sophie. She's under tension.

We live in a dangerous atmosphere. Our lives are threatened daily.

- I can imagine. - Yesterday and this morning again...

...I received deadly poison in the mail. - It's easy to trace the sender.

Deadly poisons are not easy to get.

This is rather used for murder extra quickly.

- It's a suicide's poison. - Suicide's poison.

That's interesting. Isn't it, Max?

Yes, very.

Well, I'll be running along.

I think Mrs. Baumer will sleep through the night.

That's fine, doctor.

But I'd like to talk to you about her. Maybe tomorrow, if you're not busy.

Anytime you say, doctor.

Anytime you say.

We're having a little supper tomorrow night. Just a few friends.

Afterwards, we can discuss anything you want to. Will you come?

Thanks, I believe I will.

Good, we'll see you tomorrow night.

- Good night, Dr. Jennings. - Good night.

You can go now, Officer Finkelstein.

I'm going off duty now. Is there anything I can do for you?

Hey, what are you doing with that?

I have the same blue eyes. The same blonde hair.

Quite the same face that I had this morning.

Because I had a grandmother that I never laid eyes on, I'm not a Nazi.

- I'm no longer German. - So, that's it?

- Yes. That's it. - Yeah, but this is America.

Nobody has to bump himself off on account of the color of the skin...

...or the shape of his nose. - You don't understand.

Sometimes death is the only way out for Germans like me.

Don't be a dope, Baron.

Excuse me, I'm sorry. How long have you been in this country?

About three months.

Three months. So up until three months ago, ever since you were a kid...

Hitler's been shoving that propaganda down your throat?

With all Nazi songs and uniforms and swastikas and Heil Hitlers.

And since you've been here what have you seen outside of these walls?

You can take it from me. It's a different world.

Why don't you come with me some night and meet a few of the guys?

Irishmen, Norwegians, Russians, Germans, Italians, all Americans.

They're so busy minding their own business...

they haven't got time to worry about the other guy's grandmother.

They do, they say, and they think what they want to.

Why, if they don't like something our President does, they say so.

If you look cross eyed at a picture of Hitler, off goes your head.

Baron...

let's make a deal, huh?

You think for a few days and I'll try to show you a couple of angles.

Look...

I trust you.

Don't disappoint me, huh?

Thanks, officer.

Call me Moe, Max.

Good night, Moe.

Good night, Max.

- Anything going on? - Looks like there may be...

a little trouble tonight when Hitler goes on the air.

So, they'll toss a few eggs and tomatoes.

- And maybe a few stink bombs. - It won't change the atmosphere here.

- I'll see you tonight. - Say...

...is the counsel in? - Yeah, he's checking some passports.

Four guys just arrived on the Belmont from Germany.

Kurt Wellar.

So, you came over as ships cooks?

- Yes, we did. - Did they teach you how to cook...

at the Faxtant School, too?

A good saboteur has to learn a little bit of everything.

We managed not to poison any of the passengers.

Although more than the usual number aboard ship where quite seasick.

Most of them were refugees, anyway.

Horst, do you have the four Longshoremen union cards?

Don't lose them. I had plenty of trouble getting them.

- Do you got your instructions? - Our objective is Pier 18.

- And the equipment? - Right here.

- Very clever, we Nazis. - This is the detonating device.

- It can be set to the minute. - My only regret is that...

I won't be present to see Mr. Winston Churchill's fat face...

when he learns that his first load of guns, planes and tanks...

has been blown into the Hudson River.

This job is almost as big as the Blacktown of the First World War.

I hope I don't get into any trouble over it.

You were born to get into trouble.

Set the explosion for the moment when Hitler finishes his speech.

It 'll be midnight here. Dawn in Hamburg.

Our fleet all ready to sail to victory.

The crowds gathered on the docks to bid them farewell.

The bands playing... "Deutschland, Deutschland"...

and then our F�hrer will speak...

and when he finishes...

with the crowds cheering and the guns saluting...

we'll add our little contribution.

US$8 million of war materials for England blow into bits.

A glorious and fitting climax.

- When do you go back? - Our boat sails at one.

Good, then you'll be out of danger. That's all.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

- Here's a copy of my report. - I'll talk to you later, Max.

- Well, how about my money? - You're not going to need any money.

Look here, my expenses are heavy. These uniforms and...

I've ordered 4OOO knives. The handles are cork. They leave no fingerprints.

- And from now on, I also carry a gun. - Do you have a permit?

You know they won't let us have anything at the camp but BB rifles.

- Give it to me. - I want it.

- It's loaded. - Is it?

Dumbkoff. Once you almost got yourself sent up for drunken driving.

I asked for good, pale hoffbrau. Those Legionnaires played me a trick.

They gave me something called "skunk hole swamp water".

- Horst, you are finished. - How dare you say that to me?

First, you made a convincing noise.

Some people believed you. But you're obscuring our great Nazi truth.

You've become a national comic strip.

Well, what can I do?

- Find a martyr. - A martyr?

Yes, a martyr who will die for his beliefs.

Horst, if you could contrive to get yourself...

how does one say over here?

- "Rubbed out" by a Jew. - Don't be ridiculous.

How do I get myself rubbed out by a Jew?

Their self-restraint is positively nauseating.

Maybe I could arrange it for you.

- What did you say, Baumer? - Maybe I could arrange it for you.

But how I...

- lf the American F�hrer dies... - We'll replace you.

You're trying to murder me. I won't have it.

Is the American F�hrer not prepared to die for his Nazi principles?

No, I mean yes.

The F�hrer asks no one to do what he would not do himself.

Yeah, but so far nobody's asked him.

- Look here. How about you? - Me?

Yes, you. You're much more important that I am.

This is no time for modesty.

You're a real German. My parents were born over there accidentally.

Why, I'm an American.

My good man.

I didn't mean to frighten you.

Relax a moment. Get used to the idea.

Take your time...

and I will arrange all of the troublesome details for you.

- Have you a scheme? - Not worked out yet...

but this knife for instance, which leaves no fingerprints.

What about it?

If you were found with this knife in your back...

in my hallway late tonight...

Have you already hired someone to assassinate me?

- Who else could I trust but myself? - Isn't this very risky?

Risky? For me or for you?

When you're discovered, I'll say you had quarrel with my Jewish policeman.

- But I haven't. - Hang around and I'll arrange one.

But suppose you couldn't prove that the policeman did it?

All that's necessary is that he'd not be able to prove that he didn't.

Suppose they suspect you?

Why would anyone suspect me of murdering you...

more than you of murdering me?

There's something in that thought, Baumer.

I'll expect you tonight during the F�hrer's broadcast.

That always gives me further inspiration.

- Inspiration? - Yes.

My inspirations come to me as they come to Hitler.

Out of nothing.

And mine too.

- Heil Hitler. - Heil Hitler.

Max.

I'll make a bargain with you.

If you hold up this report for one week...

I'll destroy the letter from Schroder and never reveal it's contents.

- Sorry, my report leaves at midnight. - I just need a few days.

I'll make more allowances when the Pia and it's valuable cargo...

have been disposed of.

The 3rd Reich allows no margin for error.

Then, at least, let's take the report back to Berlin instead of sending it.

I'm not going to Berlin. I'm sending in my resignation with my report.

It's my last job for them and you.

- Twister is running out on his order. - What do you mean by that?

One doesn't have to be a diplomat to know that you're in love with Sophie.

- I've never. - Don't explain, Max.

I understand the situation perfectly...

but I'm afraid you don't.

When Sophie arrives in Berlin, she'll be asked many questions.

And unfortunately, I'll be forced purely in self defense...

...to tell them certain things. - You can't make her go to Berlin.

- She's still my wife. - I won't let her go.

She loves her father. She will go with me to Berlin.

And Berlin has such a brutal custom.

They use axes on little ladies necks in Berlin.

- Why, you... - Yes?

Alright, Baumer.

- You've found my price. - I knew you'd be reasonable.

I ought to shoot you.

Shall I tear up the letter?

Tear it up.

Listen to what they're saying:

"A tisket, a tasket put Baumer in a basket".

Voice of democracy. Loud, but ineffectual.

They mean you. You're the martyr they want.

Yes, but I am not the martyr they'll get.

That bunch outside is restless. I'd better close those windows.

Stop that.

But if you get bopped by a bottle I won't send flowers to the hospital.

I want the window open. Why don't you arrest the mob?

- They've got a right to picket. - Another democratic institution.

Yes, and we're proud of it.

The police can't even control a handful of Jews.

Those guys are mostly Czechs and Pols and Germans.

What?

Its our German citizens that don't want any part of you or you or him...

...and they're getting out of hand. - That isn't true. I protest.

Control your convulsions, horsey.

I'll report you for insulting my guest.

I'm a neutral and I'm going to stay a neutral...

until I face you across a trench someday...

and while I put six inches of steel right through your swastika.

What insolence. He ought to be purged.

Arert you forgetting we're in America?

It is almost time for the broadcast.

We must not miss any part of the F�hrer's speech.

I'd just as soon miss all of it. They're all alike.

The only novelty for me it would be if somebody shot him on it.

Shall we have coffee in the library?

We presently bring you the speech of Adolf Hitler from Hamburg.

We're trying to establish contact with Hamburg.

Come in, Hamburg.

Fine. Now, we're in for a dose of Mr. Schicklegroover.

- Schicklegroover? - Yeah, Schicklegroover.

That's Hitler's real name. You know something, honey?

The world might 've been different if he hadrt changed his name to Hitler.

Just imagine people going around saying "Heil Schicklegroover".

- Heil Schicklegroover. - Heil Schicklegroover.

There's a slight delay in contacting Germany. Stand by everybody.

- Your scotch, Doctor. - Thank you.

And your pale hoffbrau, Horst? What would you like, dear?

- Nothing, thank you. - And you, Max?

- A whiskey straight, please. - We've now contacted Germany...

and we are now turning you over to our correspondent in Hamburg.

Hello, America. This is Whitney Bartons from Hamburg, Germany.

The harbor is buzzing with tens of thousands of people.

The excited crowds are waiting for the F�hrer to arrive.

Bands are playing, soldiers are marching...

- Where is the policeman, Finkelstein? ...a huge arming.

Break it up there. Let us through. What's going on here?

It's about time you put a stop to this sort of thing.

I'm a German too, but I'm a good American citizen.

And on account of these Nazi guys, decent people won't even talk to me.

Come on along with us.

Well, Max, shall we drink to our new friendship?

- Your new friendship? - Just a secret between Max and me?

Max, what is it? What has he made you do?

Why are you so concerned about Max?

I know what you're trying to do, but I won't let you.

The music stops.

Adolf Hitler.

Karl, you wrecked my life and my father's. Leave Max alone.

Do you mind if we defer this discussion 'til after the broadcast?

Horst, which one of us will get an inspiration from the F�hrer's speech.

Now see here, Baumer. I have no intention of becoming a martyr.

You shouldn't have quarreled with that policeman...

specially in front of witnesses.

Shame on if I ever so one.

If anybody's going to die, Baumer, it won't be me.

Let's drink to the F�hrer. Heil Hitler.

He knows how the encirclement was planned by Capitalistic democracies.

But no encirclement and no power will force Germany to her knees.

Karl!

You've got to get out of here. Quick.

- Here. Put these on. - I've got to tell the police.

But what good will that do anybody? He deserved to die.

- But I had no right to. - He drove you to it.

He destroyed everybody near him. You must go. You're upset now.

You can't thinking clearly. Later, you'll know I was right.

Where?

There's a boat leaving at 1 o'clock for Lisbon.

The Belmont. One of our men poses as cooking boy. He'll make arrangements.

- I'll give you a note for him. - Lisbon?

Yes, go to Hotel a Vis. Wait there until you hear from me.

Sophie, you have been through so much. Let me take care of you.

Yes, Max.

I'll write the note while you change.

National Socialism has done more for civilization in the last 7 years...

than England, America and France combined during the past 100 years.

Sophie, the boat's at Pier 12. Give this to M�ller.

I told him that we're on a secret mission. I used the maid's name...

Frieda Schmidt. It 'll save explanations. This will last a while.

Germany's peaceful aims. He says that while the so called democracies...

dreamed only of war, Germany wanted only peace.

Good luck, darling.

I took Mrs. Baumer to her room. She's not feeling well.

I don't blame her. Those Heil Hitlers don't relax me either.

For many years and on many sleepless nights I've asked myself...

"What would've happened to Europe...

if destiny hadn't given me to Germany as her F�hrer?"

I just took that guy that threw the brick down to the station.

Will you ask the counsel if he wants to prefer charges?

Okay.

Say, Mr. Baumer.

Solomon grabbed the guy who threw the brick.

Do you want to prefer charges?

He's gotta know. Mr. Baumer.

He promises that no attempt by the capitalistic democracies...

will break the loyalty to Russian allies.

He proclaims this decision historical and definite.

Turn that thing off.

- What the devil do you mean by this? - Don't move. None of you.

- Herr Baumer. - He ain't gonna answer. He is dead.

- Are you sure he's dead? - Suicide?

He killed himself. What courage. What beautiful courage.

- How do you know he killed himself? - Because...

- I don't know anything. - Did anybody hear a shot?

- The radio has been going full blast. - This place has been a bedlam.

Get this fast, everybody. This wasrt a suicide. This was a murder.

- Absolutely. This was murder. - How do you know it was murder?

A few seconds ago you knew it was suicide. Why do you change your mind?

I was merely echoing your remark. You seemed so very sure of yourself.

I'm sure of one thing. This guy was bumped off and one of you is guilty.

That's impossible. Someone must 've come through the window.

But nobody did, because the windows lock from the inside.

Say, where is Mrs. Baumer?

In her room, she wasrt well. I took her up after the speech started.

- That's right. - I'll go get her.

Nobody's leaving this room. I'll get her if I want her.

You're actually accusing one of us? That's a strong accusation.

- I'm making it. - The best offense is a strong attack.

If the guy who did it came clean, I call the homicide and you can go.

You'd better call the homicide. You are not in a position to investigate.

I'm in an unusual position. I was responsible for his safety.

No one can hold you responsible for if you werert in here.

If he wasrt in it?

You don't deny that you could've come in that way unperceived.

I've got to admit that one.

Exactly. You sneaked in with revenge and murder in your heart.

- But he had no motive. - What is the matter with you?

He had a quarrel with Baumer. We all heard it. He threatened him.

You said that you'd run six inches of steel through his swastika.

You probably destroyed the evidence when you went to the desk.

In one minute, you'll make me sore I'll say I did and bump you off next.

A double confession.

You're trying to pin this thing on Officer Finkelstein.

Dumbkoff. Nonsense. This is not Germany. This is America.

Alright, It's America. Look at the spot I'm in, already.

You've got to help me. I'm not asking it for myself.

It's for hundreds of thousands of people that I've never laid eyes on.

I see what you mean. If you don't find the murderer...

they'll use this case to persecute a lot of innocent people in Germany.

Now, you're tuned in. First thing I've got to find out...

who the gun belonged to.

Guns contain serial numbers. It 's easy to trace where it was bought.

- Not where I bought this one. - Dumbkoff.

You tricked me. This is encirclement.

Baumer took it away from me this afternoon. I have no permit.

Moe, there's no use in going through all this. I shot him.

The gun was lying right there on the desk. It was very simple.

- Ok, so you shot him. - Yes. You can call the homicide now.

- I'm ready. - But I ain't.

Stop yammering about guns. Nobody said anything about a knife.

Somebody stabbed him.

- I'd like to examine that body. - That's the medical examiner's job.

I hold the coroner's assistant as a medical examiner.

Okay, doc. You see, Max.

A guy who's been stabbed first don't shoot himself after...

and after he's been shot, he ain't in shape to tickle himself with a knife.

That's how I deducted a double murder.

- Did you say he was stabbed? - Yeah, with a cork handle knife...

...that had some foreign words on it. - It was yours, Horst.

You sure travel with an arsenal. You don't have a torpedo on you?

You won't find my fingerprints on that knife. Cork doesn't hold them.

Well, if you knew that, we'll hold that as evidence against you.

- But I have no motive. - Yes, you had.

- He was about to liquidate you. - That's a lie.

- The order came from Berlin last night. - Officer, officer, neither the gun...

...nor the knife killed him. - What?

- He had been drinking. - Don't tell me that he died...

...from delirium treatments. - He was poisoned.

- It's a massacre. - He was quite dead when he was shot.

There was a bottle of poison in that drawer last night.

- It's gone. - Then where is it?

It must be on someone's person. I demand to be searched.

Horst, you go off on more sense than a plastered bloodhound.

- I demand it. - Okay, Horsey.

You asked for it.

You two can search each other.

Why, Baron.

- Dumbkoff. - Why, I don't understand how...

- Hello. - Hello...

Captain Mulrooney. Finkelstein speaking.

Yeah, I'm down at the counsel's.

Yeah, plenty of trouble. Well, listen, Captain Mulrooney.

What? The counsel? What happened to him?

It seems that he was shot stabbed and poisoned.

Why, that... Did it kill him?

Mulrooney's embarrassed.

Yeah, I got the guy who done it.

Okay, Captain. The squad will be here in 5 minutes? That's swell.

Look.

- Do you know the combination? - I? Baumer wouldn't trust me.

Dr. Jennings, get Mrs. Baumer quick. Maybe she knows the combination.

Officer, this safe and everything in it is the property of...

- I'm looking for Karl M�ller. - What do you want with him?

I'm Frieda Schmidt. I have a note from Baron von Alvenstor.

I'm Karl M�ller.

You are Herr Baumer's maid. Are you a good hairdresser?

Frau Baumer never complained.

I shall arrange for you to work in the ship's beauty salon.

- Hans will give you your uniform. - Thank you.

- She's not Frieda Schmidt. - What do you mean?

The counsel wouldn't have a photograph of his wife's maid...

...in his office, would he? - Hardly.

I saw it there. I never forget a face.

Let me have your reports as soon as you can.

- Yes, Captain. - Okay.

Sit down, Mrs. Baumer.

You see?

Perhaps Mrs. Baumer, you will be good enough...

to explain why you've been squerading as Frieda Schmidt.

I had some personal business to attend to for my husband.

It was necessary that I leave immediately without anyone knowing.

- Hans, call the counselor. - No, you mustrt.

- Why not? - Because...

Wait a minute.

Let me go.

He's gone.

Max.

Say Baron, what is all of this about?

Mrs. Baumer comes here disguised as her maid.

I couldn't explain in my note, but she is no longer loyal to Germany.

Her husband was about to have her deported. She shot him.

- Baumer's dead? - Yes, murdered.

She wanted to give herself up, but we couldn't stand a investigation.

I knew that the best way to keep an eye on her until I could get here.

I'm sorry I had to trick you, but I couldn't let you upset our plans.

- Do you want us to take her along? - You're not going.

- Not going? - The police is looking for her.

As soon the boat reached Bermuda, she'd be arrested.

What has that got to do with us?

The police will also be looking...

for certain parties in connection with a little sabotage job on P-18.

Now, that the counsel's dead...

it might be difficult to explain your activities in this country.

But if we stay here, we are sure to be arrested.

- Suppose there's no charge? - What do you mean?

There can be no arrests if the project is abandoned.

That's impossible. The time bombs are set for 12 o'clock.

That gives us fifteen minutes to get to the pier and disconnect them.

Do you still have your union cards?

Come on. Change. We haven't a minute to lose.

Quick. Quick.

I've got to get to a phone and call the police.

There isn't time to explain now, but you didn't kill Baumer.

- He was dead when you shot him. - What did you expect telling me that?

It's true, believe me. Those men are agents of the German government.

They're sent to blow up the pier.

I must get the police, before they escape.

You wait here.

- Is there a payphone, please? - Over there.

Give me police headquarters. Quick.

- Where's the Baron? - I don't know.

Wait a minute.

- Who are you telephoning to? - One of our men.

- Is everything taken care of? - What are you telephoning about?

Take them away. And how'd the devil did they get on the pier?

They worked there as longshoremen. Horst got them union cards.

- I never got them union cards. - Put the bracelets on the Bund dealer.

- I protest. - That was a fine thing you did.

But just the same, we've got to hold you for murder.

- Why do you say that? - He's confessed he shot your husband.

It's not true. I shot him. Max saw me do it.

It's alright, Mrs. Baumer. The shot didn't kill your husband.

- Someone had poisoned him before. - The Baron.

- We found the bottle in his pocket. - I didn't do it, Sophie.

He wouldn't poison a guy and then sit around for 2 hours...

hatching the evidence in his pocket.

Why wouldn't he?

On account of the brains that he inerited from his grandmother.

Yes?

Medical examiner and the fingerprint expert are here.

Send them in.

- Have you gentlemen got your reports? - The poison undoubtedly killed him.

It drained all the oxygen from his blood.

He was already dead when he was stabbed and shot.

- That clears Mrs. Baumer of murder. - And me too.

But there's still a nice, little charge of sabotage for you.

Right, but we must leave that to the court. Have you got your report?

The glass the counselor drank from had no fingerprints but his own.

- Which means? - He killed himself...

or the murderer wore gloves when he put poison in the whiskey.

- Whiskey? Karl never drank whisky. - Who gave him the drink?

He poured me a whiskey and then a glass of his own brandy.

That's right. I remember now. The solution of any crime lies...

...in the personality of the murdered. - Well?

This one lies in the counselor's tropically acquired taste for brandy.

Are you trying to tell us that he put the poison in the brandy himself?

No, he put it in the whiskey.

Of course, he did. Don't you see? He staged Max's suicide.

- He put the poison in my pocket. - Yes, to make it look like suicide.

And at the last minute, I he changed his mind and took the poison himself.

No, the brick.

- The brick? - Yes, the brick changed it for him.

In the confusion he put his brandy down on the bar beside the whiskey.

When he picked it up again, he accidentally switched glasses.

He gave the Baron the brandy and drank the poisoned whiskey.

And he always said there was no margin for error.

I keep this as sort of a souvenir.

I like to think I had a little bit to do with the President's decision.

What happened at the trial?

Well, the jury acquitted Mrs. Baumer and Max.

Horst and his four boyfriends got 99 years each for sabotage.

Max took out his citizenship papers and enlisted in the U.S. Army.

- Excuse-me. - What happened to the German girl?

You mean Frieda? She has another job now.

And on Sundays, she goes over and takes English lessons from Mama.

I'm sorry, pal. Shooting off my mouth the way I did.

That's alright. We're all fighting for the same cause.

The same peace. The same freedom.

The same victory.