All language subtitles for RuPaulsDragRace.S12E11

RuPaul: Previously
on RuPaul's Drag Race...

You're going to be making over
Drag Race superfans.

-Surprise!
-[cheering]

-Jackie Cox.
-I liked it.

There are some looks

that I'm head over heels
in love with.

Heidi Afrodite.

She should have tied in
with some sequins or something.

The family resemblance
is kind of missing.

Jaida Essence Hall.

You are stunning.

Con-drag-ulations. You are the
winner of this week's challenge.

[applause]

Heidi, shantay you stay.

Jackie Cox.

Shantay you stay.

[cries]

[applause]

No one is going home tonight.

Ooh, Lord.

Lord in heaven.

Heidi and I
were both just given

the double save by Mama Ru.

A genie only gets three wishes,
and I've used up two.

So this third one,
we gotta make it count.

So, bitch, how y'all feeling
about this lip sync?

I mean, when I thought
I was going home

and Ru saved me,

I felt my entire heart

plummet into the bottom
of my feet.

I thought last week
I was feeling things.

This week,
I'm feeling more things.

This is like
RuPaul's Therapy Race.

I don't know
what's happening to me.

Jackie seems, like, positive,

almost like she had
an "hepiphany" last night

like the smoke
cleared out of her head.

Is it not "hepiphany?"subtitles

Epiphany?

I've been saying it wrong
this whole time.

Epiphany.

Bitch, learn something new
every day I guess.

All right.

That's three wins
for Miss Jaida,

two back to back.

It's, like,
now I've had a win

for a dancing,
musical kind of challenge.

I've had a win
for an improv challenge.

Now I've had a win
for a looks challenge.

She's well-rounded.

Well, I'm feeling, like,
bitch,

you're showing
what you came to do,

and the judges are loving it.

Jaida is really starting
to inch her way

towards a secured spot
in that top four.

I have definitely
gotten a wake-up call.

I don't know
what's been going on with me,

but I'm gonna
snap the fuck out of it.

Honestly, right now
I'm, like, a little shook

that we're just
right back to six now.

I mean, I know we're like--

obviously I'm so happy
that you're still here

and I was very sad,
to, you know,

have expected you to go.

But as soon
as she said you were safe,

there was a moment in me
where I was, like, really?

Only, because, I'm, like, okay,
now we have to start over again.

-Oh, my God.
-[laughs]

I see how it is.

I thought y'all
were gonna be happy

that I was still here,
but clearly not.

Look, when you send your friend
off at the airport,

that doesn't mean
you love them any less.

[all laugh]

The more girls who leave
and go home,

the closer I get
to winning my crown.

But if I have to whup on
these girls again one more time,

then that's what
I'm gonna have to do.

See you.
Love you, though.

RuPaul: The winner
of RuPaul's Drag Race

receives a one-year supply

of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics

and a cash prize of $100.000.

With extra-special guest judge
Whoopi Goldberg.

♪ RuPaul's Drag Race ♪

♪ May the best woman ♪

♪ Best woman win ♪

-Top six!
-Top six!

[weak applause]

[laughs] It's a new day
in the werkroom,

and she's starting to feel
like a cat with nine lives.

You guys
aren't feeling the fire?

You can call me Heidi Ho,
Heidi Dooty,

Heidi Hutton,
Heidi Heidi Heidi,

Heidi Almighty,
and now I'm Heidi Afrodite.

Hello, hello, hello.

-Hi.
-Hello.

Ladies, for today's
mini challenge,

we're gonna have ourselves

a good old-fashioned
bitch fest,

and we're gonna do it
with puppets.

[cheers and applause]
Why?

Because everybody loves puppets.

God, I miss this challenge.

[all laugh]

Here's how it works.

First, you reach
deep inside that hole

and pick out a puppet

that represents
one of your competitors.

Second, you drag it up.

Third, you and your puppet
have a bitch fest.

First up, Crystal Methyd.

Okay.

No one's been in that hole
for a long time,

so please be gentle.

[all laugh]

Jaida.

Gag.

Up next, Jackie Cox.

I got Sherry Pie.

Sherry Pie.

It's Heidi.

I'm wearing those same pants.
Oh, God!

Heidi Afrodite.

I got Crystal Methyd.

[cheering]

Jaida Essence Hall.

It's Gigi.

Gigi Goode, go on over.

Dig deep.

Oh, surprise, surprise.
Jackie Cox.

Ladies, you've got 20 minutes
to drag up your puppet,

and you can use materials
from the F&S Fabric wall.

Go!

Bitch, I just wanna make sure

I get the fashions right.

You better.

All right, ladies,
time is up.

First up, Crystal Methyd

and her puppet
Jaida Essence Hall.

Let the bitch fest begin.

Hey, Jaida.
I'm kind of confused.

What is it the essence of?

Girl, I'm confused, too.

I don't even know
what's going on.

I'm just trying to be Jaida.

Me, I'm trying to be myself
all the time.

[laughs]

You know, I've gotten
in trouble on the runway

for wearing the same pair
of boots a few times.

But how come you haven't been
spotted for those earrings?

They're the same every time!
[all laugh]

That's a low blow,
and it's not a fact.

I've only worn
the earrings twice.

Shady move.

Um...look over there.

[all laugh]

Bye.

[all laugh]

Well, Gigi, that's
a lovely dress you're wearing.

I think you look amazing today.

My mother and I
have a very close relationship.

I love her so much.

We conceptualized this garment.

[all laugh]

I love fashion.
I love shoes. I'm amazing.

Well, you sound
a lot like Maria the robot.

I am Maria the robot.

[laughs]

Hi, Heidi.
How you doing?

Hi, Sherry.
Very well--aah!

Aah! My hair fell off!

Does that puppet
look soft and supple?

The level of this bitch.

Sherry, correct me if I'm wrong.

Is this the first time

you're not dressing up
as an old lady?

Well, yes.
I'm not old. I'm from New York.

Sherry, I'm from New York, too.

Really? I've never
seen you before in my life.

Sherry!
[all laugh]

It seems you're on the branding.

Yes, my name is Sherry Pie.

That's why I'm holding a pie.

Force-feeding America!
Rraagghh!

[all laugh]

Sherry, what did I tell you
about chewing the scenery?

Sure.

What was
your name again?

[all laugh]

Say hello, Jackie.

I commend you on your attempt
to make your makeup better.

Thank you, thank you.

I've tried
really dialing it down

on the five o'clock shadow,
as you can see.

I can see that.

You've really tried
to cover that up, haven't you?

Yeah.

[laughs]

So where do you live
right now, Jackie Cox?

Well, I'm a current resident
of New York City.

And where are you from?

I'm from Canada.

You might know that
from my political debate.

All I want to do

is sink further and further
and further down.

I'm keeping my puppet up high.

Crystal Methyd. Whoo!

Let's talk about
this garment you're wearing.

You know, I just like to go
to the local thrift store

and just throw it on my body
and hope for the best.

It surely
has been working for you.

I think what the judges
are looking for from you

is to start relying
on what's in your head

and not what's on your mullet.

-[laughs]
-You know what, Heidi?

I think it's time for you
to go back in the closet.

Thank you.

This is now the Crystal show.

Mullets! Mullets! Mullets!

[all laugh]

Ladies, the winner
of today's mini challenge is...

Jackie Cox.

Oh! This is my third
mini challenge win.

Does this add up
to a maxi challenge win?

Ladies, playtime is over,

but showtime
is just about to begin.

For this week's maxi challenge,

your charisma, uniqueness,
nerve, and talent

will be center stage

as you create and perform
your own one-woman--

or should I say
one-drag-queen show?

[all laugh]

#DragRace.

Now, you can play
multiple characters

or just be yourself.

Anything goes.

Now, you'll be performing
in front of a live audience.

And Jackie Cox,
you won the mini challenge,

so you get to create
the show order.

-Oh.
-Oh.

Now, later today,
you'll be coached

by this week's extra-special,
EGOT-winning guest judge...

Whoopi Goldberg.

[screaming]
Oh, my God!

The Color Purple
is one of my favorite

of all time movies.

Whoopi is like some sort
of transcendent deity

of, like, Earth.

I'm trying to be like a Whoopi.

Now, Whoopi's
big break came

when she wrote and performed
her one-woman show on Broadway.

So take notes, ladies.

Gentlemen, start your engines,

and may the best woman win.

So, listen,
since I'm in charge,

the only thing I'm gonna say

is I would like to go first.

I just don't want
to close the show.

I'll tell you that.

I think Sherry
does not want to go last

because Sherry knows
that the end

is usually a bad position.

Nobody wants
the butt slice of bread.

I'll tell you that.

I wouldn't mind,
going, like, second or third.

I'd like to go third.

I'm with Jaida. I wanna go
kind of in the beginning.

I would like to go
somewhere in the middle as well.

Girl, not everyone
can be in the middle.

So what are you thinking, boss?

Well, okay.
So I think I'll go first.

Then Crystal.
And then I think Heidi next.

I would be okay going third.

And then does anyone feel
comfortable closing the show?

'Cause someone's got to.

Jaida, I know you didn't,
like, want to be last.

Girl.

I mean, I don't care
at this point.

If it's gonna be funny,
bitch, it's gonna be funny.

All right,
Jaida signed up for it.

So I have Heidi
followed by Gigi

followed by Sherry,
and closing out the show,

Miss Essence Hall.

Yeah.

Poor Jaida.

[laughs]

I know
she is not liking that spot,

especially going after Sherry.

That's a hard spot to fill.

Speak now, 'cause
I don't want people to come back

and tell me
things are shady later.

I'm okay with my spot.

Okay.

Ooh, Jaida.

You're in danger, girl.end act

Hi, Jackie Cox.

Hello.

It's time for us
to meet with our coaches

for our one-woman shows,

and I get to meet
Whoopi Goldberg.

Aah!

I am beyond thrilled
to meet you.

Oh, thank you.

I'm a huge Star Trek nerd.

and I wanted to be Guinan
when I grew up.

-Yeah.
-I do a lot of Star Trek drag.

So performing
for Whoopi Goldberg,

I am freaking out.

What are you
getting ready to do?

The concept is Drag Race 101:
A Brief Herstory.

-Let's get to it.
-All right.

Look, this show's
been on forever.

Has anyone been watching
since the first season?

-No.
-Yes.

Some of you yes,
some of you no.

That's okay.
Professor Jackie Cox is here.

You know, this show
has been on for 12 seasons.

So much has changed,
you know,

starting with
this vaseline filter

that covered the lens
that first season.

It was, like,
you could barely make out

what was happening.

Jackie, this is gonna
get somewhere soon, right?

Fuck, shit.

We'll get there, I promise.

All right.

Now, see,
what you guys don't know

is when there isn't
a live studio audience here,

this is actually
a shark-filled moat.

Whenever any of us
wears any amount of green,

we get those eyes
from Michelle Visage

and all of a sudden that
shark fin starts bobbing up.

[hums theme from Jaws]

♪ Dun-dun-dun ♪
Don't eat me, shark!

Shit, fuck, shit.

This isn't
how I wanted this to go.

I don't know. There's
a disconnect for me somewhere,

and it's in
the humanity of it.

I feel like
I don't know who you are.

Take yourself out
of this stand-up idea.

I don't do stand-up
because I'm not that funny.

But I can tell a mean story.

And I need to know who are you?

That's what I want.

What do you want me
to know about you?

You've got five minutes
to make us love you.

I think I try so hard
to be, like,

who I think I have to be
all the time.

Yeah, and you don't.

Yeah, and I'm thinking
of everything you're saying.

I'm thinking of all the things

that my mom said to me
growing up.

which were the opposite things

than what my dad
said to me growing up.

And, like, how Jackie Cox

is, like, somewhere
in the middle of those things.

Yes!

The truth is, when people
are super vulnerable,

you fall in love with them.

That's the hard part,

is being willing
to be honest.

I now need to synthesize
34 years of my life

into a three-
to five-minute story,

and make it happen.

Thank you.

I'll take you
to a cookout with my family

and how they all act
and nonsense

and cutting up
and misbehaving.

Are you going to behave
like some of them?

I will be, yes.

I'll be trying
to act like my grandmother,

my cousin Slick,
Lil Boo-boo.

And I have--
who is the last person?

Oh, Uncle Rob.

He's the drunk of the family.

Can we see
a little bit of him?

Hey, party in the house.

What's to eat--oh.

Oh!

Oh, God.

You know, no drunks
move like that.

Right.

You know, when people
are standing like that,

you just trying to stay up.

So you holding out

'cause you think the air's

gonna keep you
from falling over.

[all laugh]

Concentrating on saying,

"I'm not...

drunk."

-[RuPaul laughs]
-I'm not...drunk.

There you go.

If you don't want
to do a character,

but you want to allude to it,

you just yell,
"Shut up, Boo!"

[all laugh]

That's fantastic advice.

And take your time.

Let us fall in love
with these characters.

Don't rush 'em.

And all the stuff

that you wanna put
into everybody's mouth,

now's the time to do it.

[laughs]

I was gonna try

a character that is
a male exotic dancer.

Oh.

-[laughs]
-Okay.

Are you gonna do it in drag?

Yes. Something I've been
struggling with this whole time

is that sometimes
I don't go all the way in,

and I really wanna make sure
that I make people laugh,

which that's what
I really like to do, so...

So make it fun for you,

and don't worry about
if it's funny to me.

'Cause what's funny to me

may be funny
to the person over there,

-but not that one.
-Yeah.

Can you show us
one of the strip moves?

I'm trying to just,
like, really try

and come up with the movements.
I don't really--

How do you think
El Debarge would move?

Um...

probably...

♪ To the beat
of the rhythm of the night ♪

[laughs]

It's funny.

Like that.

See, you do have it.

Yeah.

And you talk about going.
You went there.

You know how to do the swim?

Uh-huh.

Do you know how to do the jerk?

[both laugh]

Please do that.

Please do that.

I thought of making
a psychic goldfish.

-Psychic goldfish.
-Yes.

I'm going to be dressed
all in black

except for here.

Oh, you're the goldfish.

-Yes.
-Oh.

When I turn, I'm like...

-Do you have jokes?
-Yes.

I imagine being, like,
my name is Madam Bubbles.

I used to be a large,
but thanks to Bait Watchers,

I've gotten that
down to a medium.

-Uh-huh.
-No?

It's high concept,
and we the audience,

we just wanna laugh.

You could be
this other character

who channels the psychic
vibrations of the fish,

and that frees you up

from having to do the gills,
you know what I mean?

It's like I'm not funny at all.

[laughs]

I'm giving you
a full-on skit

with a character,
telling you a story.

-Really?
-Yes.

Well, who is this character?

She's a flight attendant
on the plane to hell.

Wow.

Can we see
a little bit of it?

Yes. Hi, and welcome aboard

Brimstone Airways Flight 666
non-stop to hell.

That's right. Based on
your track record on earth,

you've bought yourself
a one-way ticket

to your impending doom.

-Okay.
-Not quite?

It seems a little memorized
and rote.

-Can you put the paper down?
-Sure.

Oh, God. Okay.
Was not prepared for this.

Should have been, but I wasn't.

Hmm...

All right.

Now, for today's flight--
Oh, let me try that again.

I... [sighs]

I really
get caught up in my head

when I have to think on my feet,

so I really wanted
to write an entire script--

You don't have enough time.

-Okay.
-So improv.

Don't think about it.

Say whatever
comes out of your mouth.

[sighs]

I had a different impression

of what this challenge
was going to be,

and I was so confident
about what I came up with.

And I just feel very, um...
thrown off.

I'm sorry.

I don't feel like
I'm one to get in my head.

Don't think it.
Just do it.

Ru and Whoopi
keep just telling me

like, you know, just,
like, think on your feet.

You can do this.
It's just improv.

And, like, my mind
just doesn't work that way.

You've already said to yourself
you can't.

-I know.
-And you can.

You're gonna be fine.

-Thank you.
-Bye.

I just don't know
what I'm going to do.

Okay. So the first time

that my father
ever met my boyfriend

was my 20th birthday.

I was super excited.

He's coming over,
and my father

is giving him
a little eye from the side.

And I'm, like, oh, my God.

I don't know
what's gonna go down, but--

Can I stop you?

You have a tendency
to talk really fast.

Yeah.

Give us an opportunity
to fall in love with you

and to see the character
that you're doing.

Like I said, like, most--

Slow down.

Yeah. I'm sorry.
I just, like,

I always talk really excited.

That's just, like,
within my DNA,

so I'm just trying
to work on, like,

making sure that I'm,
like, pacing myself.

Think of it as a flower.

It starts to open,

and then there's another part,

and then another part
and another part.

And it's all of that information

in this small period.

-That's what this is.
-I see what you're saying.

-Yeah.
-Cool.

Do you have any more questions
for Whoopi?

You know, I don't
even have questions.

It's, like, uhh.

I don't want to get emotional,

but when Ru told us
that you would be here,

it was, like, miraculous

because preparing to come here,

I constantly would listen to
The Color Purple soundtrack,

and this competition
is almost exactly like

the journey of Celie
in the movie.

You go through all these
really, really hard times,

but on the other side of it,
there's so much joy.

So it's like a sign to me

that you would be here today

-And I'm, like, oh, my God.
-Come here. Come here.

Goddamn it,
come here.

-Oh, my God.
-All right.

For Whoopi to, like, make
that kind of connection with me

is just, like, everything
right now.

-Thank you so much for that.
-Thank you.

And I just feel like
that's just, like, a huge sign

that maybe
something's good gonna happen,

or maybe that's a sign
I'm going home.

I don't know.
[both laugh]end act

Ooh, is it time
to make the magic?

Today we're gonna be performing
our one-woman shows

in front of Ru, Whoopi,
and the judges.

I think the other girls
don't see me as a full threat

because I'm just weird
and kooky.

But I have worked my way
from the bottom

to a consistent top
in this competition,

and I just really
want to win a challenge

before the top four is picked.

Heidi: Is everybody ready
and excited?

I don't know.

I'm completely changing
my concept from yesterday.

Oh, shit.

And we'll see if it works.

And it's probably the most
personal thing I've done

so far in this competition.

I'm going to be doing
impressions of my parents,

who are total characters
in their own right.

I don't know if my mom

is going to love
this impersonation of her.

She doesn't know I do drag.

My mom has said things
to me in the past

that have really hurt me
in profound ways

that I think I'm still
not fully healed from.

A big part of that
has to do

with her not really accepting
that I'm gay.

I still care
about what she thinks,

even though I know

that I'll never get
100% of the approval

that I've wanted
my whole life from her.

So I've really
changed the whole thing,

and it's gonna be...

something else.

But I'm excited.

The fact that,
you know, like,

we're all doing
such different concepts

is, like, okay, well, who's
gonna be stronger than the other

and what makes us stronger
than the other?

I feel like
I have so much more work to do

than anybody else
in this entire group.

I don't know what to do
with the feedback that I got.

I am terrified.

I don't want
to look like an idiot.

I don't want that
ooh-ooh-ooh moment on stage.

It's not until you hear
somebody's whose job

is literally to guide you
through your own self

say, you know,
this does not feel very you.

I think what I do
is I convince myself

that self-doubt
is not there,

and it obviously is.

Internally I compare myself
to others all the time.

I'm always very hard on myself.

That's why I always feel like

outwardly I need to look
as pristine as possible.

It's just something
to deal with later

that never gets dealt with.

And I think now is the time
to attack it head-on

'cause we only get one chance,

and I don't want
to fuck it up.

I'm actually really excited
going into this challenge.

Really,it's just me
basically telling the story

about my family.

The hardest part
of this challenge

i knowing that I'm going
to be disowned by my family

at the end of this. [laughs]

Fun fact, though. The day
I started my very first job--

She's about to go running
to one of her little stories

about little Ramseur.

-Oh, bitch.
-The Rose Nylund of the season.

-Who is Rose Nylund?
-Oh.

Jaida Essence Hall.

What I did?

Is this bitch serious?

The Golden Girls?

Oh, okay, bitch.
Well, look...

[laughs]

I'm thinking that's some bitch
from New York City they know.

I don't know who that is.

My bad.

-Jaida.
-Look over there.

[all laugh]

Oh, bitch.

[RuPaul laughs]

♪ Cover girl,
put the bass in your walk ♪

♪ Head to toe,
let your whole body talk ♪

And what?

Welcome to the main stage
of RuPaul's Drag Race.

Look at you, Ru.

What a difference a day makes.

Yes, a little lip gloss
and mascara.

This week
we challenged our girls

to create and star

in their very own
one-drag-queen shows.

And on the runway,

category is The Color Purple.

Gentlemen, start your engines,

and may the best woman win.end
act

[cheers and applause]

Michelle, is that Dahlia?

Yes.

She's stalking us.

The Big Pink Furry Box Theater

presents Jackie Cox,

Between Two Parents.

Hello. Hello.

[applause]

Now, it may be hard to believe

from what you see
in front of you,

but both of my parents
are scientists.

My father
is a mild-mannered Canadian

with a very dry sense of humor.

My mother is from Iran,

and like many immigrant parents,

had a very clear list of things

that she wanted me
to accomplish

to fulfill her dreams,

top of which
is become a doctor.

And nowhere on this list

was drag queen.

Bouncing between
these two households--

my parents clearly
did not stay married--

was something that challenged me
in many different ways.

Take my mother, for instance.

I'm maybe 12 years old
watching the TV.

[Iranian accent]
What is this?

I do not approve
of these Spice Girls.

This is too sexy-mexy.

Go to your room
and go study your book

on male anatomy.

Well, you don't have
to tell me twice.

[all laugh]

[applause]

So I hear you are interested
in performing

and music and dancing.

I believe in you.
Okay, first things first.

We're gonna start with ballet
and then jazz and then tap

and then all other dancing
starting from flamenco to salsa.

Dad, this is a lot.

I don't know
if that's what I want to do.

But a few years later,

I started to get
a little bit of an idea.

Me and a few friends
sneak out

and we drive down
to Chicago Gay Pride,

and that's when I see them
for the first time.

They look eight feet tall,

giant high heels,
giant hair.

These aren't just women.

These are drag queens,
and I'm mesmerized.

I decide to take home
a little souvenir,

a beautiful white feather boa

with sparkly parts in it, too.

I get home, sneak that boa,

hide up in the topmost corner
of my closet.

[Iranian accent]
What is this?

[all laugh]

If my mom
can get past the fact

that I'm a drag queen
on national television,

hopefully she'll get over
this impression of her.

And what have I figured out?

Having someone in your corner

who is always cheering you on
and believes in you,

that's love.

And I learned
that having someone

who always wants to make sure

that nothing bad
will ever happen to you,

that's real love.

And I also learned

to hide that feather boa
a little better.

[cheers and applause]

Thank you, guys.

[cheers and applause]

I'm a little worried
having to follow this act

because she definitely
put a lot of herself

and her heart in it,

and I'm not
playing myself at all.

Next, Crystal Methyd

in Phenomenal Phil,
Exotic Dance Instructor.

Thank you. Thank you.

How we doing tonight, ladies?

[cheers and laughter]

All right.
Well, I'm Phenomenal Phil,

exotic dance instructor
to the stars.

I worked with Channing Tatum.

I taught him
how to do the Worm.

[screaming]

I've also taught
Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson

how to do The Sprinkler.

[screaming]

I even taught Betty White
how to do The Jerk.

[all laugh]

Are you all ready
to start Philling yourselves?

-Yes!
-Yes!

I brought you moves

from my dance training DVD
Phil Me Up.

[all laugh]

This first move is
The Litterbox.

[all laugh]

Get yourself in the mind
of a pussycat.

And then you get that
soiled sand, like, out of here.

Get it out!

[all laugh]

And then
we're gonna dump it, okay?

-Oh!
-Get it out.

Phil it up.

We're not done yet.

We probably got some
on our legs,

so do a little bit of this,

a little bit of that.

All right, Crystal.
She's killing it out here.

[cheering]

We might have to change her name

to Phenomenal Phil
after this performance.

This is my big money-maker.

It's the Brazilian
Banana Inspector.

Start up, and just find
the banana in the tree.

I think they grow on trees.

[all laugh]

Pull it down,
and then you gotta make sure

you work the nips
on the way down.

So here, give it a little bit...

Gimme a little bit of that,

and then we work it down
to the hips.

[cheering]

[laughter and applause]

All right, everybody,

I think that's about
all the time I have for today.

I'll be in the back
selling my DVD,

but only for about 20 minutes,

because I'm performing
at a bar mitzvah later.

[all laugh]

-Thank you!
-Bye, Phil!

Up next, Heidi Afrodite.

Whoo!

In Cookout With Your Cheeks Out.

Ooh, y'all look so good.
Y'all look so good.

I really just want to give y'all
some of my hometown living.

The first member of my family
I want you to meet

is my grandmother.

She's the one who raised me,

and she really...

hates everyone.

[all laugh]

Let me introduce you
to Grandmother.

'Bout time all y'all
got here in my house.

Now, y'all best stop
opening up my door and stuff.

I don't pay to air-condition
the outside.

Oh, Lord, have mercy,
here comes Sharon

with that nasty-ass
potato salad. Oh, Lord.

[all laugh]

Hello, hello, everyone.

Oh, how are you all doing?

I brought the potato salad.

Don't worry.

Imma put it
right here in the middle.

Now, Sharon, I done told you
about that potato salad.

You don't season it,

you don't put
the right potatoes in it,

you don't even
put mustard in it.

[gasps] How dare you talk
about my potato salad!

And there's always Uncle Rob,
the drunk.

Why y'all-- [hiccup]

Why y'all fighting?

Rob, I done told you,

take yo drunk ass
and sit down somewhere.

Always in somebody business.

The party don't start
till Cousin Slick walks in.

Yo, yo, yo, what's up, cuz?

What's up, y'all?
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.

Yo, what's here to eat?
Aunt Sharon's salad.

Oh, you know,
it's my potato salad here.

You know, it's so good.

No, no, no, Aunt Sharon,
no, no, no.

No, last time I had
your potato salad

I had to blow that bathroom up.

[all laugh]

Dumbass. [hiccup]

Just you wait and see, Sharon.

Imma laugh right in yo face.

Heidi is not giving
what I expected from Heidi.

Yo, yo, yo, I gotta go.
Bye, bye, bye, oh, oh.

Baby, the ship is--
it's not sinking,

but it's a few holes in it.

You have a good night,
everybody.

[cheers and applause]end act

The Furry Box Theater
presents Gigi Goode

in Welcome Aboard
Brimstone Airways.

[cheers and applause]

Good morning, sinners.

Welcome aboard
Brimstone Airways Flight 666

non-stop to hell.

Right, you all did something
in your lives to piss up--

to piss off
the big guy upstairs.

I'm gonna let you know

why a couple of you are here,
all right?

Let's see. You.

You in the front row
in this ripped-up denim jacket.

-What's your name?
-Derrick.

Gary, nice to meet you, Gary.

Gary, your credit score
sucks, Gary.

[all laugh]

-You, what's your name?
-Morgan.

I'm gonna call you Karen
from now on. Is that okay?

I'm gonna tell you why you're
on your way to hell, Karen.

It's because you're
a goddamn hypocrite, all right?

I see you mixing textiles.

Oh!

He's paying attention.

[all laugh]

Give me one second.

I'm gonna gather
my extremely important tools.

All right, if you'll kindly
familiarize yourself

with the lack of exits
on this aircraft.

You'll look
to my left and right,

that's right, no exits here.

Okay? For your in-flight snacks,
we have just one option.

It's peanuts!

Unsalted peanuts.

Welcome to hell, bitch.

[all laugh]

Okay, let's see
where I'm at now.

All right, so...

I love Gigi's concept,

but I'm seeing Gigi kind of
trying to remember her outline,

and keep going back to it

when she's on a roll
on different jokes.

Okay, all right.

So when we do land,
something will magically open

and you'll get off

and immediately
be engulfed in flames.

So as stated before,

that tiny piece of fabric
with metal attached to it

is not gonna protect you
from shit, Karen.

Or you, Gary.

I see you're wearing
distressed denim.

It's 2020.
Keep that in mind.

All right, I've just
received word from the captain

that we are beginning
our initial descent.

On behalf of Brimstone Airways,

I want to thank you
for choosing us

as your means
of transportation today,

and please enjoy your stay
in Detroit.

[all laugh]

Thank you. Burn in hell.

Thank you.
Go fuck yourself, Gary.

Bye-bye!

Next up, Bubbles and Sherry.

[cheers and applause]

Hello, everybody.
My name is Sherry Pie.

That's pie,
just like the food group,

and I'm Sherry with an "S,"
not "cherry" with a "C,"

because Sherry with an S
goes "shh," not "chh."

[all laugh]

Ladies and gentlemen,
boys and--

No, there are no children here.

Broccoli, ha. How are you?

I'm here to talk to you
about magic.

Magic comes
in many different forms.

Now, here--who--ooh, aah.

I just had a horrible stroke,

and none of you
did anything about it.

[all laugh]

I'm so scatterbrained.
I'm sorry.

I was drinking before the show.

Sherry's one-woman show
is hilarious,

but, you know,
it's supposed to be

Madam Sherry
and the fish Bubbles.

Where is the fish?

Something that a lot of people
don't know about mesubtitle

is that I'm psychic.

With Sherry and Bubbles,
you will believe in magic!4
minutes

Oh, my God, you have a cross.

You really believe in magic.

[all laugh]

We still going?

All right, everybody
put your hands togethersubtitle

for my co-hostess,
the one, the only, Bubbles!

[cheers and applause]

I'm going to need to
let you in on a little
secret.subtitle

Don't listen, Bubbles.

[all laugh]
Thank you for laughing.

This is what's called "absurd."

What is happening?

I thought
we only had five
minutes.subtitle

Hello. I'm Madam
Bubbles.subtitle

I am psychic.

Miss Sherry, bitch,
come on now, honey.

[slurring]
Eh, thank you all so m--subs
continue

[all laugh]new subtitle

Bitch, you do know
that I'm next, right?

You're not closing the show.

[slurring] It's really been
a pleasure entertaining
you.minutes subtitle

[cheers and applause]new
subtitle

She was doing a lot.

I don't think
it was purposeful, but...

Up next, Jaida Essence Hall
in The "P" In "Pageant."

[cheers and applause]

Hey, broke bitches,
my name is Jaida Essence Hall.

And for those of you
who do not know me,

I am a drag queen
and a badass bitch, okay?

Yeah!

And for those of you
who do know me,

I am sorry.
[all laugh]

Imma take you all on a tour
of one of the worst experiences

that has ever happened to me
in my life.

Now, one time I was hired to
judge and perform at a pageant.

The girls are beautiful,

they're walking around
in these beautiful gowns,

and I get a little shake
in my right leg.

Child, ooh.

So I look over
for a familiar face. Hey, Ru!

Except Ru happened
to be my boyfriend.

He comes on over.

I'm in a situation.

Imma need
a little bit of help, okay?

The category is over, I push
the chair back, I start to run.

Baby, I have to piss.

Tap him on the shoulder,
run into the bathroom.

Ooh, y'all are not feeling it.
That's all right.

[all chuckle]

That's all right.

We're going on a journey.
Okay.

And I'm like, okay, baby,
help me out here.

I'm pulling up my dress.
He's all on the floor.

He's fumbling around.

And I'm like, baby,
come on, come on, come on.

Come on, come on.
And then I stop.

Uh-oh.

[laughs]

[urine splashing]

All I can do is look down
at my man on the floor...

looking up at me
covered in urine.

Oh!

I head back
to the judges' table.

The head judge says,
"Please, please, please

can we get some air freshener
over here?"

Oh, no.

But then he looks over and says,

"These other judges to the left,

they had hot dogs
with onions on them."

-Oh!
-Oh!

[inhales]

Jaida...

was that the joke?

Look over there!

To me, this was one of the most
terrifying things

that ever happened in my life.

And sadly, I've just
played it out in front of y'all,

and y'all didn't even
laugh at the shit.

But that's all right.

I hope y'all had a great time,

and that was the night
that I put the "P" in "Pageant."

Thank you so much!

Terrible.

Terrible, terrible.

Bitch, I fucked up.end act

♪ Gonna love you,
you're a superstar ♪

Category is The Color Purple.

First up, Jackie Cox.

Ross: Her skirt's so short,
her lips are showing.

[all laugh]

-Oh!
-Ooh!

Jackie: The first thing I think
of

when I hear the word "purple"
is that song,

the one-eyed, one-horned,
flying purple people eater.

I'm having
a lot of fun with it.

Whoopi: Why is there a stamp
on her tongue?

It's Molly.

-Oh!
-Oh!

Molly, you in danger, girl.

[all laugh]

You know I wasn't gonna say it.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Crystal Methyd.

Michelle:
How now, purple cow?

[all laugh]

Ross: She's making me horny.

Crystal: My inspiration
for this look is Nick Cave,

an artist who makes soundsuits,

these beautiful outfits that,
like, move around all cool.

This is just really bizarre
and totally Crystal Methyd.

Michelle: She's on the rag.

Okay, Michelle.

[all laugh]

I had to fight that one.

[all laugh]
I did.

RuPaul: Heidi Afrodite.

Ross: She's eggplant-emoting.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Take a look
at that potato salad.

[all laugh]

Heidi: I'm giving you
purple lace the house down.

You see all these curves,
these swerves,

and you can see all that
soft and supple skin.

This is my real body, America.

I don't know why y'all gagging.

I give it to you every time.

Well, not every time.
[laughs]

Ross: Watch out for Slick.

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Gigi Goode.

Huh?

Gigi: Jinkies, we've got
a mystery on our hands.

My look is loosely inspired

by one of my favorite
childhood cartoons.

I've got my necktie,
my cute little green buttons.

I am skipping down that runway,

and, girl,
I'm giving the judges

their childhood fantasy
they've been looking for.

RuPaul: And I would have
gotten away with it, too,

if it wasn't
for you meddling kids!

[all laugh]

Sherry Pie.

The future of fashion is feral.

Sherry: Me-oww.

I am full-on
Cheshire Cat fantasy.

It looks like a big,
furry tail wrapped around me.

I just feel like
an Alice in Wonderland fantasy.

Ross:
Do The Kitty Litter dance!

[all laugh]

Dump it!

[all laugh]

RuPaul: Jaida Essence Hall.

She's on CP time:
Color Purple time.

[all laugh]

Whoopi: Now, where's Oprah?

Jaida: I feel my fantasy,

because I have
this beautiful hat.

It's blocking my light

because I don't want everybody
to see all of this face.

The body and this garment
are doing all the work.

I love having money,
I love feeling like money,

and this look just drips money.

Michelle:
She puts the "P" in "purple."

[all laugh]

Ross: Mi-chelle Vi-sage.

Come on, call back.

[all laugh]end act

Welcome, ladies.

It's time for the judges'
critiques...

starting with Jackie Cox.

Tonight on the runway
you are a one-eyed, one-horned,

flying purple Molly eater.

[laughs] Yeah.

It's very not Jackie,
and I like that you took a risk.

It's a skosh craft store,
but, you know,

when it's campy like this,
I can forgive craft for camp.

Let's talk about
your one-drag-queen show.

[Iranian accent]
What is this?

What you were able to do today
was blend comedy with heart.

This was your room to command,

and you didn't wanna look away.

And that's a good storyteller.

You know, I said to you

once you show
that vulnerability,

it allows us
to fall in love with you,

and...

we fell in love with you.

Thank you so much, RuPaul.
Thank you.

Up next, Crystal Methyd.

Hi!

Let's talk about Phenomenal
Phil, exotic dance instructor.

It was just all so stupid.

[all laugh]

Michelle hit the nail
on the head.

New level of stupid.
[all laugh]

Which is, by the way,
how you win this show.

We were all with you.

We were all kind of
learning these dance moves.

The cat box is my favorite.
[all laugh]

Because I saw you
have a good time with it.

And tonight on the runway,

what I really love
is the switch-up of the makeup.

You took it into
a whole different realm,

and I think that's phenomenal.

You have had a pivot
in this competition,

where you've really gone all in
on your weird.

I am weird, and so sometimes

I feel like maybe
people won't like that.

Fuck 'em. Doesn't matter.

As long as
you're having a good time,

we wanna go where you're going.

If you have any doubts in your
head, any insecurities, dump it.

[all laugh]

You got it.

Up next, Heidi Afrodite.

Hi.

Michelle, don't you
just love that name?

It's the best one
out of the last 20.

Yeah.
[all laugh]

I actually really loved
your concept

for your one-drag-queen show.

Slick seemed hot.
He single?

[all laugh]

Trust me, you don't want
none of Slick.

-Trust me, honey.
-No?

Girl, you don't know my taste.

-Oh, my God.
-Here's the deal.

I love that you tried
to do something really big.

It was just a lot.

You've gotta make sure those
characters are so differentiated

that I know exactly when
you're popping into Grandma,

and I know when
you're popping into Aunt,

and I know--you know
when I'm popping into Slick.

[all laugh]
Hey, hey, hey.

Let's be honest. We all know
Slick's doing the popping.

Okay, let's be honest.
[all laugh]

Everybody does start sounding
a little bit like the other one,

because in your mind, okay,
you know what they look like,

but we don't know
what they look like.

Right.

We're taking your word for it.

Tonight on the runway,

I do wanna compliment you again.

Your face is just
looking better each day.

Thank you.

I let you wear my dress tonight.

[all laugh]
And I must say,

you have to keep it,
because it's gorgeous.

Thank you so much,
Miss Goldberg.

Just Whoopi. You can't have
a name like "Whoopi"

and be called "Miss" anything.

[all laugh]

-Up next, Gigi Goode.
-Good morning, sinners.

I didn't know you were
the Don Rickles of drag.

"Go fuck yourself, Gary"?
[all laugh]

It was a completely
original idea.

I thought you could have done
a ton more with it.

You felt like
you were nervous to me, Gigi.

I totally understand
what you mean.

See?
[all laugh]

-See?
-I know.

If you trust your gut,
97% of the time

it will lead you
in the right direction.

I love this look,
but I'm not surprised by that.

You've got this gorgeous
out here, right?

And a weird little mind
in there.

Well, thank you.

So just like we've been able
to see Crystal trust her gut

and go all-in
and push that boundary line,

I want you to do that, too.

Got it.

Thanks, Karen.

Fuck you.

[all laugh]

Up next, Sherry Pie.

Tonight on the runway,
you look absolutely stunning.

You can really paint.

I want to do those eyes.

I think I would scare
the women at the table,

just because
no one would ever understand

why I look so good
and they look like them.

[all laugh]

Fishy Fortunes
with Bubbles and Sherry.

The concept was fantastic,
the delivery was fantastic

if it wasn't an hour long.

I think you clocked in
at 17 minutes.

Did you know it was that long?

-No.
-Yeah.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry.

[all laugh]

It makes you selfish,

and you're taking time
away from the other girls.

So here's the deal.

The Ross Mathews
who has dinner reservations

was like, "Come on,
let's pick this up."

But it was so funny,
because you sold it.

Just let go
at about five minutes in.

All right, up next,
Jaida Essence Hall.

Hello.

When we asked
for your number one story,

we didn't mean
your number one story.

[all laugh]

I guess it's better
than your number two story.

-Yes!
-I don't want that.

The best part was when
you made fun of yourself

that it wasn't working.

Ooh, y'all are not feeling it.

You know,
and I felt like really then

you got the audience
back on your side.

-Yeah.
-But you had already given up.

I was, like, already, when I
started, I was like, oh, my God,

I got--was kind of
a little bit of fatigue.

So I'm like, oh, girl,

we gotta try
to go after this, and--

Because you waited 20 minutes.

-Yeah.
-For real.

I'm sorry.

That's fine.

-Did you choose to go last?
-No.

-So Jackie assigned you last?
-Yes.

I thought
you kind of gave up, too,

and I was trying to vibe you,
going, don't give up.

You're almost there,
don't give up.

So next time, you know,
if it doesn't work,

Fuck it.
Try something else.

Tonight on the runway
I absolutely love this.

It looks like
the Paris runway version

of what Whoopi wore
on Star Trek.

Thank you, yes.

I did wear this outfit,
but not nearly as well.

My legs were not nearly as long,

because my feet are size 11
and I'm 5'3".

That's my problem in life.

Thank you, Jaida.
I just wanna say this.

You six are really some of
the best we've ever had here.

Whoo.

I just think
you're something else.

You know, I wish you would be
the six forever and ever.

-Oh.
-Oh.

I really do.

Mwah. Thank you.

All right, now,
while you untuck backstage,

the judges and I
will deliberate.

All right, now, just between
us squirrel friends,

whaddaya think?

Let's start with Jackie Cox.

Tonight,
her one-drag-queen show

was brilliant
from beginning to end.

What I loved most about it is
she didn't try to force jokes.

And her heart was center stage.

Now, the outfit, I could see

she's trying to do
some type of Moschino storyline,

but it was a little cheap.

The hairline
was down to her eyebrows.

Nobody saw that?

Do I even know
what I'm looking at?

No.

No. See, this is why
I didn't say shit.

Okay, well, we did, we got you.

Crystal Methyd.

If I were standing backstage
and she was about to come out,

I would stop her and say,
"Hey, dear, let's rethink this."

[all laugh]
Right?

It was just
one of the most unique things

I've ever seen on this stage.

We went wherever
she wanted us to go,

and we had a good time.

On the runway, it's totally
Crystal, and it was fantastic.

I just thought tonight
was Crystal's night.

-Yeah.
-Heidi Afrodite.

-In the challenge...
-Dumbass.

She was barely keeping
her head above water.

But on the runway,

she was swimming laps
around some of the other girls.

Listen, I wanna give her credit
for trying to do what she did,

because she swung big.

But for me, when she started,

right away I thought
she's in danger.

I won't do the pun, Whoopi,
I promise.

I think had she taken out
maybe two of the characters,

we could have had something
really compelling here.

-Mm-hmm.
-Gigi Goode.

Tonight on the runway, we've
come to expect this from Gigi,

and she delivered it tonight
flawlessly.

What I loved about Gigi's show

is that
it was a twisted concept.

The problem was is she
didn't commit fully to it.

Yeah.

Let's move on down
to Sherry Pie.

It was an epic yarn.

[all laugh]

She's one
who has to perform often.

She was like, "Fuck this,
I'm talking."

-Yes.
-There are rules to follow.

But I just thought you were
actually a little harsh.

Which part?

Well, when you called her
selfish, when you--

It was self-indulgent.

If she was not being
self-indulgent,

she would have realized
there's a five-minute cutoff

and there's another girl
waiting to go.

Okay, you two,
you need to get a room.

[all laugh]

Jaida put the "P" in "pageant."

She put the "P"
all over the stage, too.

Tonight, her one-drag-queen show
was just kind of cringe-y.

I bet that story was so funny

when she called her best friend
and told her on the phone.

You know, oh, girl, I pissed
myself, and told the story.

-Yes.
-I bet it was hilarious.

Well, because
she probably took her time

and didn't start
with the visual.

But my goodness,
does she look great tonight.

That's what perfection
looks like.

-Mm.
-Silence.

I've made my decision.

Bring back my girls.end act

Welcome back, ladies.

I've made some decisions.

Jackie Cox.

-You're safe.
-Thank you.

You may step
to the back of the stage.

Gigi Goode.

You're safe.

Thank you.

Crystal Methyd.

Con-drag-ulations. You're the
winner of this week's challenge.

Yes!
[applause]

-Aah!
-Dump it.

[all laugh]

And you've won a cash tip
of $5.000.

Yes, Crystal!

-You may join the other girls.
-Thank you.

Finally, I won a challenge!

Aah! Aah!

There could not be
a better time.

I feel like I can do anything!

Sherry Pie, you're safe.

Thank you.

You may join the other girls.

That means Heidi and Jaida,

I'm sorry, my dears, but you
are both up for elimination.

Two queens stand before me.

Ladies, this is your last chance
to impress me

and save yourself
from elimination.

The time has come...
[thunder]

for you to lip sync...

[echoing] for your life!

America, I'm not fixing
to go home,

so I'm gonna do whatever
it takes on this stage

to make sure that I stay
in this competition.

Good luck,
and don't fuck it up.

[music plays]

Yes, Jaida!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

[all laugh]

♪ I was dreaming
when I wrote this ♪

♪ So sue me if I go too fast ♪

[cheering]

♪ Yeah, they say
two thousand zero zero ♪

♪ Party over,
oops, out of time ♪

♪ So tonight I'm gonna party
like it's 1999 ♪

♪ Yeah,
lemme tell you something ♪

♪ If you didn't come to party ♪

♪ Don't bother
knocking on my door ♪

♪ I got a lion in my pocket ♪

♪ And, baby,
he's ready to roar... ♪

This is gonna be
my fourth time in the bottom,

but I didn't come here
just to lay down and die.

Imma slay all day
like it's 1999, baby.

♪ But before
I'll let that happen ♪

♪ I'll dance my life away ♪

♪ Oh-oh ♪

♪ They say
two thousand zero zero ♪

♪ Party over,
oops, out of time ♪

♪ We're running outta time ♪

♪ So tonight I'm gonna party
like it's 1999... ♪

Jaida is strutting
all over that stage.

-Oh!
-She looks just like Prince.

It is amazing.

Heidi is doing her thing.

It is gonna be a tough call.

♪ 1999 ♪

♪ Don't you wanna go? ♪

♪ 1999 ♪

♪ Don't you wanna go? ♪

♪ 1999 ♪

[applause]

-Nice, girls!
-Whoo!

I've gotta catch their breath,
because I can't catch mine.

Whew.

Ladies, I've made my decision.

Jaida Essence Hall,
shantay you stay.

Thank you.
Thank you so much.

You may join the other
girls.subtitle

My dear Heidi,
no more hiding in closets.

Yeah!
[applause]

Now sashay away.

Thank y'all so much
for seeing something in me

even when I didn't see
something in myself.

[crying]

You are a superstar.

I think you're probably
the last one to know it.

Start looking at property
outside of Ramseur.

You might wanna move to
Los Angeles or to Manhattan.

But let me tell you something.

Kiddo, you're a star.

I'm so excited
for the world to see you.

They're gonna love you.

Just remember,
pay your taxes, okay?

Oh, no. Okay.

I definitely will.
Thank you.

[applause]

A small-town queen
with big-city aspirations.

Watch out, world, because
Heidi's coming through.

And remember, if I can do it,
so can you.

-Yes, Heidi!
-Yes!

[applause]

Whew, child.

I've exceeded every expectation,

really showing
that the small-town queen

can be fierce, too.

I just know all of Ramseur's
gonna be excited.

Hopefully I'll get a key
to the city. Fingers crossed.

Thank you [whistling] so much.

[whistling] Signing off
from soft and supple.

Heidi...something.

[trills]

Con-drag-ulations, ladies.

And remember,
if you can't love yourself,

how in the hell
you gonna love somebody else?

Can I get an "amen" up in here?

-Amen!
-Amen!

All right,
now let the music play.

♪ I am American, American ♪vote

♪ The red, white, and blue ♪

♪ I am American, American ♪

♪ Just like you, too ♪disclaimer

RuPaul: Next time
on RuPaul's Drag Race...

You've got some big shoes to
fill,

and I do mean big shoes.

I don't think anyone
is 100% confident

that they're gonna make it
to the finale.

If anyone slips up...

You're out and going home.

♪ I am American,
American, American ♪

♪ I am American, American ♪

♪ The red, white, and blue ♪

♪ I am American,
American, American ♪

♪ I am American, American ♪

♪ Just like you, too ♪

♪ Am-Am-Am-Am-American,
American, American ♪

♪ I am American, American ♪

♪ The red, white, and blue ♪

♪ I am American, American ♪

♪ Just like you, too ♪