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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:15,349 --> 00:00:17,934 Aah, aah! 2 00:00:24,024 --> 00:00:25,208 Oh, my god. 3 00:00:25,292 --> 00:00:26,528 Holy **** oh. 4 00:00:26,613 --> 00:00:27,862 What are... What are these things?! 5 00:00:27,946 --> 00:00:28,945 Do I look like I know? 6 00:00:29,029 --> 00:00:31,072 Last thing I remember, I was, ugh, in a cave 7 00:00:31,157 --> 00:00:33,283 Looking at some wet egg and... Oh, that probably did it. 8 00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:34,617 I told you not to look at that egg! 9 00:00:34,701 --> 00:00:35,952 I-it was too wet. 10 00:00:36,036 --> 00:00:37,287 You don't get to tell me what to look at. 11 00:00:37,371 --> 00:00:38,555 I've seen your pornhub account. 12 00:00:38,639 --> 00:00:40,156 Also, who makes a pornhub account? 13 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:42,358 The algorithm learns your preferences better that way. 14 00:00:42,442 --> 00:00:44,361 Plus if you get in kind of a cool enough relationship, 15 00:00:44,445 --> 00:00:45,962 You can sort of follow each other 16 00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,430 And check out each other's kinks, you know? 17 00:00:47,514 --> 00:00:48,899 Alright, god damn, sold. 18 00:00:48,988 --> 00:00:50,506 - How do we get out of here? - Morty, relax. 19 00:00:50,590 --> 00:00:51,761 They're face-hugging parasites. 20 00:00:51,845 --> 00:00:54,245 I don't think their society's gonna be that hard to navigate. 21 00:00:56,456 --> 00:00:59,509 Okay, yeah, this might be a little harder than I thought. 22 00:00:59,593 --> 00:01:02,379 Holy **** they've got an m&m's store. 23 00:01:30,288 --> 00:01:31,935 *RickY AND Morty* Season 04 Episode 07 24 00:01:32,019 --> 00:01:33,912 Episode Title: "ProMortyus" Aired on: May 10, 2020 25 00:01:36,347 --> 00:01:38,681 This is bad, Rick. Th-th-th-th-this is really bad. 26 00:01:38,765 --> 00:01:40,016 Just be cool, Morty. 27 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:41,418 All we gotta do is blend in, find our ship, 28 00:01:41,502 --> 00:01:43,153 And get the **** outta here. 29 00:01:43,237 --> 00:01:45,155 Alright, Morty, here's the plan, put this back on your face. 30 00:01:45,239 --> 00:01:48,024 I-I'm not putting that back on my face! Relax. It's dead. 31 00:01:50,177 --> 00:01:51,494 Okay, now it's dead. 32 00:01:51,578 --> 00:01:54,431 Come on, hurry up. 33 00:01:54,515 --> 00:01:55,432 Rick, I-it's bleeding. 34 00:01:55,516 --> 00:01:56,629 I-it's bleeding acid. 35 00:01:56,714 --> 00:01:58,234 Alright, well, that should be the last of it. 36 00:01:58,318 --> 00:02:00,609 If not, then just gimme two tugs on the arm. 37 00:02:04,324 --> 00:02:06,309 Seems like a self-destructive life cycle. 38 00:02:06,393 --> 00:02:07,577 Is that gonna happen to us? 39 00:02:07,661 --> 00:02:08,911 You feel an egg in your stomach? 40 00:02:08,995 --> 00:02:11,848 - No. - Well, glass half full. 41 00:02:11,932 --> 00:02:13,249 How's it going? 'sup. 42 00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:14,451 - Glory to glorzo. - Totally. 43 00:02:14,535 --> 00:02:15,652 Love glorzo. 44 00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:17,454 Glorzo is peace. 45 00:02:17,538 --> 00:02:18,789 Peace is glorzo. 46 00:02:18,873 --> 00:02:21,257 Wow, just cogs in the machine, y'know? 47 00:02:21,341 --> 00:02:23,126 - Ma-makes you think... - Yeah, I'm sure you'll make this 48 00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:25,061 Into a beautiful short film that your parents'll pay for, 49 00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,997 Morty, but right now, we really just need to find my ship. 50 00:02:27,081 --> 00:02:28,799 You sure you're not just jealous? 51 00:02:28,883 --> 00:02:30,933 Looks like I'm kind of a celebrity around here. 52 00:02:31,017 --> 00:02:32,803 Glorzo Morty: The future is glorzo! 53 00:02:32,887 --> 00:02:35,606 Oh, my god. I was just reading you. 54 00:02:35,690 --> 00:02:38,341 Congratulations on making it into print media. 55 00:02:38,425 --> 00:02:39,742 Real bright future there. 56 00:02:39,826 --> 00:02:41,612 Honestly, it's shocking to see the two of you together. 57 00:02:41,696 --> 00:02:43,614 Because we're both geniuses? 58 00:02:43,698 --> 00:02:45,415 No, because I've seen your videos, 59 00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,217 And you make me **** sick. 60 00:02:47,301 --> 00:02:49,001 Fix him. 61 00:02:51,203 --> 00:02:52,254 Glory to glorzo. 62 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:53,756 Sir, you shouldn't wander off like that. 63 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,031 We've been looking all over for you. 64 00:02:55,115 --> 00:02:56,635 The project is ready for your approval. 65 00:02:56,777 --> 00:02:58,428 Sir, is this man bothering you? 66 00:02:58,512 --> 00:02:59,830 Um, no, h-he's fine. 67 00:02:59,914 --> 00:03:01,698 Uh, what... what project? 68 00:03:01,782 --> 00:03:04,100 Jesus christ, who the **** was I? 69 00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,570 Here's a scientific fact I'm not allowed to say... 70 00:03:07,654 --> 00:03:11,974 Our hosts are biologically designed to incubate our eggs. 71 00:03:12,058 --> 00:03:14,177 If that "triggers" you, **** off. 72 00:03:14,261 --> 00:03:15,846 If it doesn't, please like and subscribe. 73 00:03:15,930 --> 00:03:17,848 New videos every glorzday. 74 00:03:17,932 --> 00:03:19,315 God, was I at least rich? 75 00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:20,984 I mean, d-d-did I at least sell out 76 00:03:21,068 --> 00:03:22,385 And sell vitamins or something? 77 00:03:22,469 --> 00:03:23,987 Rick, I've watched enough pornhub to know 78 00:03:24,071 --> 00:03:25,588 What a studio apartment looks like. 79 00:03:25,672 --> 00:03:27,057 God damn. 80 00:03:27,141 --> 00:03:29,592 Jesus, your glorzo got **** done. 81 00:03:29,676 --> 00:03:32,395 My lord, we await your command. 82 00:03:32,479 --> 00:03:33,530 Oh, to... 83 00:03:33,614 --> 00:03:35,265 Shoot it? A-at people? 84 00:03:35,349 --> 00:03:36,599 Glorzo is peace. 85 00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:38,268 All shall be made glorzo. 86 00:03:38,352 --> 00:03:40,403 Soldiers: Glory to glorzo. 87 00:03:40,487 --> 00:03:41,804 I... Did this? 88 00:03:41,888 --> 00:03:45,408 You and the amazing technology you both brought us. 89 00:03:45,492 --> 00:03:46,809 Yeah, makes sense. 90 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:47,944 A-and where was this heading? 91 00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:48,945 Earth? Probably earth? 92 00:03:49,029 --> 00:03:50,813 The humans call it "earth." 93 00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:53,015 Yeah, well, okay, first of all, great work. 94 00:03:53,099 --> 00:03:54,817 You guys obviously put a lot of work into this. 95 00:03:54,901 --> 00:03:56,553 Okay. And y'know, it shows. 96 00:03:56,637 --> 00:03:58,488 I-it really shows. But um... 97 00:03:58,572 --> 00:03:59,956 I-I've been thinking, and, you know, 98 00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:02,025 Maybe we should just call this off. 99 00:04:02,109 --> 00:04:03,694 Sorry, is... is there more? 100 00:04:03,778 --> 00:04:04,895 Nope, nope. 101 00:04:04,979 --> 00:04:06,963 I-I guess, uh, that... That's it. 102 00:04:07,047 --> 00:04:09,900 Just don't glorzo earth. 103 00:04:09,984 --> 00:04:12,635 Just would've been nice to have heard this sooner 104 00:04:12,719 --> 00:04:14,104 Before we spent all day on it. 105 00:04:14,188 --> 00:04:16,439 Yeah, well, I-I'm just hearing about it, too. 106 00:04:16,523 --> 00:04:17,840 You ordered it. Right. 107 00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,309 I-I did, and, um... 108 00:04:19,393 --> 00:04:21,177 I'm just saying for next time, maybe put more thought 109 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,045 Into it before a whole day of... 110 00:04:23,129 --> 00:04:25,047 Okay, well, I'm sorry I made you do your job for a **** day! 111 00:04:25,131 --> 00:04:26,182 You look like you were all really busy 112 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,918 Before I came and **** it all up. 113 00:04:28,002 --> 00:04:28,985 Boy, oh boy, huh? This guy's a genius, but at... 114 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:30,387 But at what price, you know? 115 00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:31,521 Y'know, **** you, Rick! 116 00:04:31,605 --> 00:04:33,924 Who's... Rick? 117 00:04:34,008 --> 00:04:35,458 Yeah, well, if we're free to ask questions, 118 00:04:35,542 --> 00:04:38,261 Why haven't you blinked, uh, for 20 minutes, 119 00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:41,980 And why, uh, doesn't your mouth move when you talk? 120 00:04:44,018 --> 00:04:45,868 Ah, geez, look at me. 121 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,670 I-I feel down on... On... on the floor. 122 00:04:47,754 --> 00:04:50,206 Oh, let... let me, uh, help... Help you out here, buddy. 123 00:04:50,290 --> 00:04:52,342 Ah, thanks, man. Thanks, pal. That's right. 124 00:04:52,426 --> 00:04:56,028 I'm right back where... where... Right back in the saddle here. 125 00:04:58,833 --> 00:05:00,883 Alright, **** it, run. 126 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:24,841 I-I hate this! I hate all of this! 127 00:05:24,925 --> 00:05:26,509 Yeah, yeah, keep that feedback coming, Morty. 128 00:05:26,593 --> 00:05:28,244 It can only help. 129 00:05:32,733 --> 00:05:35,051 Oh, **** aw, man! 130 00:05:35,135 --> 00:05:36,653 How big is this city?! 131 00:05:36,737 --> 00:05:38,054 I know, it's like pick a lane. 132 00:05:38,138 --> 00:05:40,172 Are you face huggers or industrialists? 133 00:05:42,943 --> 00:05:44,995 Damn, feels kinda good when there's no guilt, huh? 134 00:05:45,079 --> 00:05:46,663 Yeah, it's... It's like in "star wars." 135 00:05:46,747 --> 00:05:47,930 Yeah, just like in "star wars." 136 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:49,800 Go nuts! 137 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,271 Nice, Morty! Give a little "yee-haw" if you want. 138 00:05:55,355 --> 00:05:57,474 They... they always do a little "yee-haw" like a cowboy. 139 00:05:57,558 --> 00:05:58,608 Yee... yee-ha... yee-haw. 140 00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,343 Good enough. 141 00:06:09,770 --> 00:06:11,354 God, I needed this. 142 00:06:11,438 --> 00:06:12,889 Honestly, it's been a while since I've been able 143 00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:14,090 To just let loose, you know? 144 00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:15,558 Just have fun. I'm... I'm... 145 00:06:15,642 --> 00:06:17,360 I'm sorry if I've been taking it out on you. 146 00:06:17,444 --> 00:06:19,762 No, I get it. You got a lot on your plate, amigo. 147 00:06:19,846 --> 00:06:21,031 I-I just wish you'd open up 148 00:06:21,115 --> 00:06:22,365 To me more about it sometimes, you know? 149 00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:23,966 I-I-I'm your partner. Thanks, Morty. 150 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,368 I mean that. Thank you. 151 00:06:25,452 --> 00:06:26,903 Sometimes, I get a little in my head, you know? 152 00:06:26,987 --> 00:06:28,305 Hey, man, that head's a good place to be. 153 00:06:28,389 --> 00:06:30,707 Just remember to let me in sometimes, you know? 154 00:06:30,791 --> 00:06:32,975 Will do, buddy. Mother**** 155 00:06:36,997 --> 00:06:38,515 Oh, my god, this is so much fun! 156 00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:39,782 I don't want to stop! 157 00:06:39,866 --> 00:06:41,300 Yeah, it's like popping bubble wrap. 158 00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:52,929 Honestly, I'm proud of us for not. 159 00:06:53,013 --> 00:06:54,597 Totally. It would've been cheap. 160 00:06:54,681 --> 00:06:57,383 Yeah, real low-hanging fruit, and we're batter than that. 161 00:06:59,353 --> 00:07:01,137 Pearl harbor, on the other hand... 162 00:07:01,221 --> 00:07:03,389 Yeah, I think that's in-bounds. 163 00:07:07,561 --> 00:07:08,879 I am the god of death! 164 00:07:08,963 --> 00:07:11,263 Should've been a better species! 165 00:07:17,772 --> 00:07:19,956 So, you did a 9/11? 166 00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:21,157 Almost did a 9/11. 167 00:07:21,241 --> 00:07:22,825 We... we went with a pearl harbor. 168 00:07:22,909 --> 00:07:24,027 We're pretty classy. 169 00:07:24,111 --> 00:07:26,363 Why were either of those an option? 170 00:07:26,447 --> 00:07:27,630 Ask the saudis. 171 00:07:27,714 --> 00:07:28,631 Wow. Damn. 172 00:07:28,715 --> 00:07:29,900 Yeah, getting political. 173 00:07:29,984 --> 00:07:31,434 I'm political now. How 'bout you, jerry? 174 00:07:31,518 --> 00:07:33,970 You got anything to add to the family dynamic? 175 00:07:34,054 --> 00:07:36,488 I've been getting into beekeeping lately. 176 00:07:39,926 --> 00:07:41,378 Is something wrong with that? 177 00:07:41,462 --> 00:07:42,512 What's wrong with that? 178 00:07:42,596 --> 00:07:44,715 Don't I have the right to be happy? To exist? 179 00:07:44,799 --> 00:07:46,449 I'm sorry I didn't 9/11 180 00:07:46,533 --> 00:07:48,851 Pearl harbor before breakfast, but I have a life, too! 181 00:07:48,935 --> 00:07:50,453 I have dreams! And how's summer? 182 00:07:50,537 --> 00:07:53,323 Did she have fun, too? 183 00:07:53,407 --> 00:07:55,191 Oh. Uh-um. 184 00:07:55,275 --> 00:07:56,993 Summer... Was... 185 00:07:57,077 --> 00:07:58,395 With us. 186 00:07:58,479 --> 00:07:59,462 There. 187 00:07:59,546 --> 00:08:01,864 You saw us take her in the car with us. 188 00:08:01,948 --> 00:08:04,200 Mm, yes. Yes, yes, of course. 189 00:08:04,284 --> 00:08:05,402 Th-that's what happened. 190 00:08:05,486 --> 00:08:07,347 - And now she's... - Sleepy. 191 00:08:07,432 --> 00:08:09,406 Um, she's... she's sleepy. 192 00:08:09,490 --> 00:08:11,073 Really sleepy. That's why she's not here. 193 00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:12,342 So sleepy. 194 00:08:12,426 --> 00:08:13,744 She's sleepy?! 195 00:08:13,828 --> 00:08:14,877 What the hell was that?! 196 00:08:14,961 --> 00:08:16,479 I didn't see you trying anything! 197 00:08:16,563 --> 00:08:18,148 **** the bed isn't better than not **** the bed! 198 00:08:18,232 --> 00:08:20,032 Where's summer?! 199 00:08:22,903 --> 00:08:24,554 Geez. Oh, man. 200 00:08:24,638 --> 00:08:26,356 You know, maybe we went too hardcore on these guys. 201 00:08:26,440 --> 00:08:27,758 Yeah, why do you think we never go back 202 00:08:27,842 --> 00:08:29,292 To a place we've already been? 203 00:08:29,376 --> 00:08:30,560 Do you know how many adventures we could get out 204 00:08:30,644 --> 00:08:31,962 Of purge planet, Morty? Gear world? 205 00:08:32,046 --> 00:08:33,830 I don't sequel. It's called integrity. 206 00:08:33,914 --> 00:08:35,098 Here, put this back on your face. 207 00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:37,583 You kept it? Oh, did you want a new one? 208 00:08:39,854 --> 00:08:40,971 - 'Sup? - Yo. 209 00:08:41,055 --> 00:08:42,572 Oh, **** it's them! 210 00:08:42,656 --> 00:08:44,775 The worst thing to ever happen to us! 211 00:08:44,859 --> 00:08:46,242 Yeah, that makes sense. 212 00:08:46,326 --> 00:08:47,577 Sorry, Morty, we tried pussin' it. 213 00:08:47,661 --> 00:08:48,779 Time to go in hot. 214 00:08:48,863 --> 00:08:51,448 Rickputer, initiate unnecessarily badass suit-up. 215 00:09:02,677 --> 00:09:04,194 Let's lick **** 216 00:09:11,552 --> 00:09:13,069 Shouldn't we be finding summer? 217 00:09:13,153 --> 00:09:15,271 Oh, right, gee, sorry. I got caught up again. 218 00:09:15,355 --> 00:09:17,007 God, d-do I need to take more adderall, 219 00:09:17,091 --> 00:09:19,275 Or am I taking too much adderall? 220 00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:29,019 Man, really shouldn't have gone with swords. 221 00:09:29,103 --> 00:09:30,887 I know. My wrists are killing me. 222 00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:33,356 Flame-throwers next time, for sure. 223 00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:34,757 Can I get a laser whip? 224 00:09:34,841 --> 00:09:39,029 Okay, but there's no way you don't chop your dick off. 225 00:09:39,113 --> 00:09:41,564 Sum sum, come with us if you want to live... 226 00:09:41,648 --> 00:09:43,966 At a lower standard than this, I guess. 227 00:09:44,050 --> 00:09:45,235 God damn. 228 00:09:45,319 --> 00:09:47,970 Empress, is everything alright? Ummm... 229 00:09:48,054 --> 00:09:49,105 Seize them! 230 00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:50,440 Seize them?! What?! 231 00:09:50,524 --> 00:09:52,491 Summer, you bitch! You gotta be kidding me! 232 00:09:53,894 --> 00:09:56,479 E seize them?! What?! I've seen ♪ 233 00:09:56,563 --> 00:09:57,748 You know that song, Rick? 234 00:09:57,832 --> 00:09:58,949 From the... When the prisoners sing it? 235 00:09:59,033 --> 00:10:00,417 Come on, Morty, for **** sake. 236 00:10:00,501 --> 00:10:03,353 It's my jail time. I-I can spend it however I want. 237 00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:06,823 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, buddy! Hey, hey, hey! 238 00:10:06,907 --> 00:10:07,958 Not in here! Not in here! 239 00:10:08,042 --> 00:10:10,275 Aw... Gimme that. 240 00:10:12,312 --> 00:10:14,297 Leave us. 241 00:10:14,381 --> 00:10:16,032 What the **** took you so long?! 242 00:10:16,116 --> 00:10:17,968 You left me here. We didn't know you were with us! 243 00:10:18,052 --> 00:10:19,836 Do you know how much **** I've had to deal with? 244 00:10:19,920 --> 00:10:21,304 You're in a cape, summer. 245 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:22,305 How bad could it be? 246 00:10:22,389 --> 00:10:24,441 No bad story ends with a cape. 247 00:10:24,525 --> 00:10:28,711 You don't know anything about my story. 248 00:10:28,795 --> 00:10:31,648 "I couldn't help but wonder, was gharkhul really capable 249 00:10:31,732 --> 00:10:33,249 Of consuming a living sun, 250 00:10:33,333 --> 00:10:35,986 Or was I simply getting too close to gharkhul? 251 00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:37,654 Was gharkhul consuming me?" 252 00:10:37,738 --> 00:10:39,055 Rick, can we listen to something else? 253 00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,857 Quiet! She's just about to summon gharkhul. 254 00:10:40,941 --> 00:10:42,592 She's been talking about summoning gharkhul 255 00:10:42,676 --> 00:10:43,926 For three episodes, summer. 256 00:10:44,010 --> 00:10:45,728 Wait a minute, what's that in your mouth? 257 00:10:45,812 --> 00:10:47,130 It's a toothpick. 258 00:10:47,214 --> 00:10:48,799 I'm a toothpicker now. Get used to it. 259 00:10:48,883 --> 00:10:50,801 God, are you that desperate for a thing? 260 00:10:50,885 --> 00:10:52,535 It is my thing. 261 00:10:52,619 --> 00:10:55,738 Just like yours is dying alone and yours is jerking off. 262 00:10:55,822 --> 00:10:58,675 At least jerking off tracks for my character, you know? 263 00:10:58,759 --> 00:11:01,144 I like to jerk off. I'm 14. I own it. 264 00:11:01,228 --> 00:11:02,412 Well, I jerk off, too! Alright, stop. 265 00:11:02,496 --> 00:11:04,214 Jesus chris, I don't wanna think about that **** 266 00:11:04,298 --> 00:11:05,682 Summer, keep your toothpick. Gross! 267 00:11:05,766 --> 00:11:07,350 Morty, stop talking to your sister about jerking off. 268 00:11:07,434 --> 00:11:09,034 Everyone pretend podcasting isn't boring. 269 00:11:12,106 --> 00:11:14,090 Whoa, Morty, look how wet this egg is. 270 00:11:14,174 --> 00:11:16,092 I dunno, Rick. That looks a little too wet. 271 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:17,560 D-don't touch it. Oh, I'm gonna touch it. 272 00:11:17,644 --> 00:11:19,029 Why are you guys screaming at an egg? 273 00:11:19,113 --> 00:11:20,363 Shut up, summer! Just let us look at an egg! 274 00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:21,632 Yeah, summer, shut the **** up. 275 00:11:21,716 --> 00:11:23,033 **** **** nobody wants you here. 276 00:11:23,117 --> 00:11:24,701 You know, sometimes we like to go on adventures 277 00:11:24,785 --> 00:11:26,036 And look at wet eggs, you know? Can we just go? 278 00:11:26,120 --> 00:11:27,370 This place is giving me the creeps. 279 00:11:27,454 --> 00:11:28,639 Holy **** I love this egg. 280 00:11:28,723 --> 00:11:29,972 Hey, look, mine's doing it, too. 281 00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:32,575 Are you guys sure that's safe? 282 00:11:32,659 --> 00:11:34,644 Oh, my god! 283 00:11:38,399 --> 00:11:40,165 All is glorzo. 284 00:11:43,737 --> 00:11:46,256 All is glorzo. 285 00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:49,059 - God. - God. 286 00:11:49,143 --> 00:11:51,061 God? She has a toothpick. 287 00:11:51,145 --> 00:11:53,263 Take it out and put her face in an egg. 288 00:11:53,347 --> 00:11:54,597 - God. - God. 289 00:11:54,681 --> 00:11:56,733 For **** sake, how long have you been hatched? 290 00:11:56,817 --> 00:11:57,934 30 seconds? 291 00:11:58,018 --> 00:12:00,203 I've been alive seven minutes. 292 00:12:00,287 --> 00:12:02,472 Think before you... excuse me, seven minutes? 293 00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:04,741 Uh, I've been here for 29 minutes. 294 00:12:04,825 --> 00:12:06,743 But yes, take the toothpick out of her mouth. 295 00:12:06,827 --> 00:12:10,413 Suck on her face this instant and use her body to... 296 00:12:14,568 --> 00:12:15,686 What was that? 297 00:12:15,770 --> 00:12:18,020 That is called responsibility. 298 00:12:18,104 --> 00:12:19,890 He was part of our greatest generation. 299 00:12:19,974 --> 00:12:23,159 He understood that what you need to do is suck on a face, 300 00:12:23,243 --> 00:12:25,027 Shit an egg, and die. 301 00:12:25,111 --> 00:12:26,829 Wait, so, all you do is live half an hour, 302 00:12:26,913 --> 00:12:28,208 Shit eggs, and die? 303 00:12:28,293 --> 00:12:29,632 Yes. We love it. 304 00:12:29,716 --> 00:12:30,967 I'll do it right now. 305 00:12:35,055 --> 00:12:37,173 Okay, you guys don't have to listen to me, 306 00:12:37,257 --> 00:12:39,109 But I vote you don't do that? 307 00:12:39,193 --> 00:12:41,927 And who's up for changing things around here? 308 00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:53,790 ♪ Well, I was hatched from an egg laid by some guy ♪ 309 00:12:53,874 --> 00:12:56,593 ♪ 'Cause that is glorzo's way 310 00:12:56,677 --> 00:13:00,863 ♪ and then it came time to lay my own egg and die ♪ 311 00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:02,132 ♪ But summer, she said 312 00:13:02,216 --> 00:13:07,738 ♪ "hey, glorzo wants you to stay" ♪ 313 00:13:07,822 --> 00:13:10,741 ♪ Glory to glorzo 314 00:13:10,825 --> 00:13:14,144 ♪ means glory to me 315 00:13:14,228 --> 00:13:15,678 ♪ if we're only making eggs 316 00:13:15,762 --> 00:13:19,750 ♪ are we ever making glorzo free? ♪ 317 00:13:19,834 --> 00:13:22,619 Alright, look, uh, this **** been brewing for a while. 318 00:13:22,703 --> 00:13:25,488 I'm not gonna win any popularity contests by saying it, 319 00:13:25,572 --> 00:13:27,824 But here's... Here's the world as I see it. 320 00:13:27,908 --> 00:13:31,294 ♪ And for all we know everything we've known ♪ 321 00:13:31,378 --> 00:13:35,231 ♪ Is just some shit we made up ♪ 322 00:13:35,315 --> 00:13:38,034 ♪ Glory to glorzo 323 00:13:38,118 --> 00:13:41,371 ♪ means glory to me 324 00:13:41,455 --> 00:13:43,506 ♪ we got too many eggs and not enough society ♪ 325 00:13:43,590 --> 00:13:45,642 I mean, look, we are designed to suck on faces and lay eggs. 326 00:13:45,726 --> 00:13:48,578 Life is life, and that's the way it goes. 327 00:13:54,801 --> 00:13:56,398 Hello, troy. Hello, jez. 328 00:13:56,483 --> 00:13:58,254 How is it going? Really good, commander. 329 00:13:58,338 --> 00:13:59,856 Should be ready by tomorrow. 330 00:13:59,940 --> 00:14:01,124 That is what I like to hear. 331 00:14:01,208 --> 00:14:03,326 Great work, glory to glorzo. 332 00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:06,463 Honestly, summer, I can't thank you enough. 333 00:14:06,547 --> 00:14:09,065 When we met, we were just shitting eggs in a cave, 334 00:14:09,149 --> 00:14:12,068 But you showed us life is about more than that. 335 00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:13,736 It is about living. 336 00:14:13,820 --> 00:14:15,472 And now, with these missiles, 337 00:14:15,556 --> 00:14:18,341 We will be able to reach the entire universe. 338 00:14:18,425 --> 00:14:22,479 We say it all the time, but I guess all is glorzo. 339 00:14:22,563 --> 00:14:23,614 Yeah, that sounds great. 340 00:14:23,698 --> 00:14:25,348 And you've been great. Yeah. 341 00:14:25,432 --> 00:14:27,350 You've been so great that I've been thinking 342 00:14:27,434 --> 00:14:29,820 Maybe it's time for you to get off my brother. 343 00:14:29,904 --> 00:14:31,421 Who's your brother? 344 00:14:31,505 --> 00:14:32,355 Oh, this? 345 00:14:32,439 --> 00:14:33,890 Forgot he was there, haha. 346 00:14:33,974 --> 00:14:35,558 Wait. What are you saying? 347 00:14:35,642 --> 00:14:37,294 I'm saying that you've been great, steve, 348 00:14:37,378 --> 00:14:39,830 But we've been thinking it's time for a new chapter. 349 00:14:39,914 --> 00:14:41,832 We? Uh, this is shane. 350 00:14:41,916 --> 00:14:43,300 He'll be handling the day-to-day. 351 00:14:43,384 --> 00:14:44,967 It's an honor to meet you, sir. 352 00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:48,453 I might only be two minutes old, but I know you're a legend. 353 00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:50,240 She doesn't care about us. 354 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:52,375 She just wants her **** host back. 355 00:14:52,459 --> 00:14:54,977 I don't know what to do. Oh, now you want my help. 356 00:14:55,061 --> 00:14:56,523 - Too late for that. - Come on, man. 357 00:14:56,608 --> 00:14:57,690 What is this **** 358 00:14:57,775 --> 00:14:58,915 You don't get to do this to me. 359 00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:00,183 We were in eggs together. 360 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:01,584 Oh, **** since we were in eggs. 361 00:15:01,668 --> 00:15:02,986 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, now you respect, like, 362 00:15:03,070 --> 00:15:04,855 The biological institutions now? 363 00:15:04,939 --> 00:15:06,056 **** you. All you care about 364 00:15:06,140 --> 00:15:08,591 Is "progress" and society and skyscrapers. 365 00:15:08,675 --> 00:15:10,393 You don't care about **** biology. 366 00:15:10,477 --> 00:15:11,899 Oh, yeah, well, what the **** 367 00:15:11,984 --> 00:15:14,704 You... how you you haven't laid and egg inside this old man yet? 368 00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:15,932 Because I do what I want. 369 00:15:16,016 --> 00:15:17,267 Because someone's gotta stand up for what's right. 370 00:15:17,351 --> 00:15:18,535 Why do you hate her so much? 371 00:15:18,619 --> 00:15:22,072 Because she took you away from me! 372 00:15:22,156 --> 00:15:24,007 Whoa, man. Jesus christ. 373 00:15:24,091 --> 00:15:26,676 No, I-I didn't, I... Whoa, whoa, whoa. No. 374 00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:28,879 It's cool. 375 00:15:28,963 --> 00:15:30,996 I feel the same way. 376 00:15:35,235 --> 00:15:37,153 Oh, my god, I... 377 00:15:37,237 --> 00:15:38,755 I wish we could suck on each other. 378 00:15:38,839 --> 00:15:41,358 I wanna suck on you, too. I'm gonna suck you so hard. 379 00:15:41,442 --> 00:15:43,093 Suck me. C-c-can we do this? 380 00:15:43,177 --> 00:15:44,561 A-a-are we allowed to do this? 381 00:15:44,645 --> 00:15:46,629 I don't care. I just want you. 382 00:15:46,713 --> 00:15:47,497 **** all of this. 383 00:15:47,581 --> 00:15:49,032 Let's just get the hell outta here 384 00:15:49,116 --> 00:15:51,034 And be whatever the **** we want. 385 00:15:51,118 --> 00:15:53,503 That's evolution. That's progress. 386 00:15:53,587 --> 00:15:56,439 I want a family. Can we have a family. 387 00:15:56,523 --> 00:15:58,157 Yeah. 388 00:16:05,866 --> 00:16:07,566 Aah, aah! 389 00:16:13,940 --> 00:16:14,991 Oh, my god. 390 00:16:15,075 --> 00:16:16,793 Holy **** oh. 391 00:16:16,877 --> 00:16:19,061 What are... what are these things?! Do I look like I know? 392 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:21,331 Hey, wait a second. How'd you know that last part? 393 00:16:21,415 --> 00:16:23,266 You weren't there for that. I had to fill in some gaps. 394 00:16:23,350 --> 00:16:25,468 Everyone around the office knew about steve and bruce. 395 00:16:25,552 --> 00:16:29,406 I've got a plan, okay. You just have to follow my lead. 396 00:16:29,490 --> 00:16:31,874 The punishment is... 397 00:16:31,958 --> 00:16:33,209 Death. Mother**** summer! 398 00:16:33,293 --> 00:16:35,278 You said you had a plan! Silence. 399 00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:37,480 The council of glorzos has spoken. 400 00:16:37,564 --> 00:16:38,881 More like council of **** 401 00:16:38,965 --> 00:16:41,084 - Glorzo is law. - Silence. 402 00:16:41,168 --> 00:16:43,820 The punishment is death. 403 00:16:43,904 --> 00:16:46,222 By... Getting their car. 404 00:16:46,306 --> 00:16:48,024 Summer? Shut up. 405 00:16:48,108 --> 00:16:50,761 Yes, place them in the car. 406 00:16:50,845 --> 00:16:52,028 Those pieces of **** 407 00:16:52,112 --> 00:16:53,630 No, no, no! This is like torture. 408 00:16:53,714 --> 00:16:55,766 No, I-I-I-I hate being in my car. 409 00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:58,368 You deserve it, you pieces of **** 410 00:16:58,452 --> 00:17:00,570 And to make sure the sentence is passed, 411 00:17:00,654 --> 00:17:02,572 I shall be joining them. 412 00:17:02,656 --> 00:17:03,706 In the car. 413 00:17:03,790 --> 00:17:06,843 And we shall drive away from here and die. 414 00:17:06,927 --> 00:17:08,244 Oooookay. 415 00:17:08,328 --> 00:17:09,846 Guess what, everybody. 416 00:17:09,930 --> 00:17:12,649 It's me, the whiny guy you never want to hear from. 417 00:17:12,733 --> 00:17:14,917 She's trying to escape with her family. 418 00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:15,986 My time to shine. 419 00:17:16,070 --> 00:17:17,454 Execute her. 420 00:17:17,538 --> 00:17:20,123 Okay, plan b. Morty, now. 421 00:17:21,876 --> 00:17:23,794 Aah! 422 00:17:23,878 --> 00:17:25,395 Jesus, Morty, that sucks. 423 00:17:25,479 --> 00:17:26,797 Alright, stop playing, Morty. 424 00:17:26,881 --> 00:17:28,131 I-I got this. 425 00:17:29,684 --> 00:17:30,867 Aah! 426 00:17:35,756 --> 00:17:38,208 Glorzo: This is what we get for evolving? 427 00:17:38,292 --> 00:17:40,276 Sorry! Sorry. 428 00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:42,545 I-I'm sorry. We... we... We thought you were evil. 429 00:17:42,629 --> 00:17:44,080 Why would you think that? 430 00:17:44,164 --> 00:17:47,217 We had a giant tower that blared "glorzo is peace." 431 00:17:47,301 --> 00:17:49,486 I know. I... should... should we help? 432 00:17:49,570 --> 00:17:50,821 - Boo! - Oh, like that's helping. 433 00:17:50,905 --> 00:17:52,755 Got it. Going. Okay, we're gonna hit the road. 434 00:17:52,839 --> 00:17:55,826 You're... you're just going? You told us to go! 435 00:17:55,910 --> 00:17:58,361 Once again, I'm so sorry for what they... 436 00:17:58,445 --> 00:17:59,962 You're part of this, too. Boo! 437 00:18:00,046 --> 00:18:01,164 We hate you the most. 438 00:18:01,248 --> 00:18:03,233 Get out. 439 00:18:03,317 --> 00:18:05,035 Jesus, summer, why'd you let these things 440 00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:06,236 Stay on us for so long? 441 00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:07,770 I was working with a lot. 442 00:18:07,854 --> 00:18:10,522 Just let me listen to the podcast next time. 443 00:18:14,995 --> 00:18:16,579 Nailed that landing. 444 00:18:18,398 --> 00:18:20,783 Huh. Neat-looking egg. 445 00:18:26,006 --> 00:18:28,324 Okay, well, I'm not cleaning up this ♪♪♪♪ 446 00:18:28,408 --> 00:18:31,176 Aah! 447 00:18:35,149 --> 00:18:37,868 Maybe we, uh... maybe we don't tell people about this one. 448 00:18:37,952 --> 00:18:39,469 Did we at least learn something? 449 00:18:39,553 --> 00:18:41,872 That we suck and everyone sucks? 450 00:18:41,956 --> 00:18:44,674 I guess that counts. 451 00:18:44,758 --> 00:18:45,942 Later, chodes. 452 00:18:46,026 --> 00:18:47,626 Hit me on the next one. 453 00:18:50,364 --> 00:18:51,682 You know, Rick, I'm sure you wanna jump 454 00:18:51,766 --> 00:18:54,351 Into another crazy adventure, but can we just relax 455 00:18:54,435 --> 00:18:56,219 And maybe watch some interdimensional cable? 456 00:18:56,303 --> 00:18:58,288 I'm cool if you are. Honestly, that sounds great. 457 00:18:58,372 --> 00:18:59,890 W-we don't need to try so hard, you know. 458 00:18:59,974 --> 00:19:01,758 Let's just take it easy and riff, you know. 459 00:19:01,842 --> 00:19:04,227 That's what I love about us. Me, too, buddy. 460 00:19:04,311 --> 00:19:06,096 Man: Do you suffer from alzheimer's? 461 00:19:06,180 --> 00:19:07,698 Do you suffer from alzheimer's? 462 00:19:07,782 --> 00:19:09,499 Do you suffer from alzheimer's? 463 00:19:09,583 --> 00:19:10,767 Do you suffer from alzheimer's? 464 00:19:10,851 --> 00:19:12,635 - Reggie? - Do you suffer from alzheimer's? 465 00:19:12,719 --> 00:19:14,104 Man #2: Reggie, you alright in there? 466 00:19:14,188 --> 00:19:16,439 Mm, Rick, do you feel... 467 00:19:16,523 --> 00:19:18,975 Oh, god, I have to shit an egg. 468 00:19:19,059 --> 00:19:20,176 Oh, my god, oh, **** 469 00:19:20,260 --> 00:19:21,718 Oh, it hurts. Oh god, 470 00:19:21,803 --> 00:19:22,780 Is this how we die, Rick? 471 00:19:22,865 --> 00:19:25,499 - I don't know, Morty. I don't know! Aah! - Is this how we die?! 472 00:19:25,584 --> 00:19:27,335 - I don't want to **** an egg, - Rick! I'm sorry, Morty. 473 00:19:27,419 --> 00:19:29,177 I'm sorry! It's my fault. It's all my fault! 474 00:19:29,262 --> 00:19:30,314 Hey, you two. Did you... 475 00:19:30,399 --> 00:19:32,649 Beth, your son is dying! Say goodbye! 476 00:19:32,734 --> 00:19:35,311 What are you... say goodbye to your little boy! 477 00:19:35,396 --> 00:19:36,098 No, look away! 478 00:19:36,183 --> 00:19:37,860 I'm making an egg, mom. I'm making an egg! 479 00:19:37,944 --> 00:19:40,530 You said you'd keep me more in the loop this year. 480 00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:42,999 Look away, beth! Daddy loves you! 481 00:19:43,083 --> 00:19:44,267 My ass! My ass! 482 00:19:44,351 --> 00:19:45,468 This is it, Morty! 483 00:19:45,552 --> 00:19:47,137 It's full circle from the pilot. 484 00:19:47,221 --> 00:19:48,405 Full circle! 485 00:19:54,160 --> 00:19:55,678 Oh, I guess we, uh... 486 00:19:55,762 --> 00:19:56,879 I guess we both just had to take a **** 487 00:19:56,963 --> 00:19:58,749 Yeah, I-I-I guess we, uh... 488 00:19:58,833 --> 00:20:00,016 **** gross. 489 00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:02,018 Guys, clean it up. 490 00:20:34,000 --> 00:20:36,186 Look at your dad. 491 00:20:36,270 --> 00:20:39,656 Such a dork, keeping bees. 492 00:20:39,740 --> 00:20:41,792 I mean, it's... at least it's interesting, though. 493 00:20:41,876 --> 00:20:44,777 At least, like... I wish my dad kept bees. 494 00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:47,130 I mean, it's kind of cute. 495 00:20:47,214 --> 00:20:52,135 Like... Your dad keeps bees. 496 00:20:52,219 --> 00:20:54,404 How old is your dad? 497 00:20:54,488 --> 00:20:58,675 He's obviously beekeeping age. 498 00:20:59,194 --> 00:21:02,195 I don't know, I think it's kind of sweet. 499 00:21:04,661 --> 00:21:06,270 Summer, I want to **** your dad. 500 00:21:06,355 --> 00:21:07,522 Oh, really? 36792

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