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1
00:00:21,444 --> 00:00:23,112
Hi, Sam.
2
00:00:23,145 --> 00:00:24,781
Hi, Dr. Akoya.
3
00:00:24,813 --> 00:00:26,114
How are you doing?
4
00:00:26,147 --> 00:00:27,883
I'm okay.
5
00:00:27,916 --> 00:00:29,785
Been behaving yourself?
6
00:00:29,817 --> 00:00:32,286
Well, you're about to find out.
7
00:00:32,319 --> 00:00:33,799
You might find
some evidence in there.
8
00:00:35,689 --> 00:00:37,123
Gosh, you're so crazy.
9
00:00:37,156 --> 00:00:39,493
I can see you haven't
been behaving yourself.
10
00:00:39,526 --> 00:00:42,261
You've got a belly full
of dicks there, young lady.
11
00:00:42,294 --> 00:00:43,996
Oh, God!
12
00:00:44,029 --> 00:00:46,732
- Sam, you must stop.
- Sorry.
13
00:00:46,764 --> 00:00:47,999
Okay, shall we take a look?
14
00:00:48,032 --> 00:00:50,902
- Fine.
- All right.
15
00:00:50,935 --> 00:00:53,505
Okay. Anyway,
16
00:00:53,537 --> 00:00:56,473
I was just kidding.
I haven't done anythi-ing.
17
00:01:06,548 --> 00:01:07,916
Okay?
18
00:01:07,949 --> 00:01:09,518
Yeah.
19
00:01:12,119 --> 00:01:14,454
Right. Okay.
20
00:01:14,487 --> 00:01:16,623
All good. All normal.
21
00:01:16,656 --> 00:01:20,326
Okay. Normal, like...
22
00:01:20,358 --> 00:01:22,360
for my age?
23
00:01:22,393 --> 00:01:23,629
How close am I?
24
00:01:23,662 --> 00:01:25,263
Close to...
25
00:01:25,295 --> 00:01:27,532
Like, have I shut down
down there?
26
00:01:27,565 --> 00:01:28,766
Am I a man yet?
27
00:01:28,799 --> 00:01:30,968
Please tell me I'm
close to being a man.
28
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,301
No more periods.
29
00:01:32,335 --> 00:01:35,171
Sam, I hate to tell you,
30
00:01:35,204 --> 00:01:36,873
but you have
the reproductive system
31
00:01:36,905 --> 00:01:38,106
of a 16-year-old.
32
00:01:38,140 --> 00:01:40,475
Oh, my God.
33
00:01:40,509 --> 00:01:44,112
Yeah. Your tubes are
ripe and working.
34
00:01:44,145 --> 00:01:46,781
Jesus, that's so weird.
35
00:01:46,813 --> 00:01:48,882
Why?
36
00:01:48,915 --> 00:01:51,518
I don't know. I just...
Because...
37
00:01:51,552 --> 00:01:53,687
Ew! Shut up.
Stop talking about me.
38
00:01:53,719 --> 00:01:55,521
Okay. All right.
39
00:01:55,555 --> 00:01:57,723
Talk about you.
When are you due?
40
00:01:59,323 --> 00:02:01,192
Any bloody minute,
as you can see.
41
00:02:01,225 --> 00:02:03,562
Can I feel?
42
00:02:03,594 --> 00:02:05,663
- Yeah, of course.
- Oh!
43
00:02:05,696 --> 00:02:08,732
Hello, there, baby.
44
00:02:08,765 --> 00:02:10,967
Your mommy's a doctor.
45
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:15,404
And your daddy's a...
Uh, writer?
46
00:02:15,436 --> 00:02:19,908
Yeah, yeah. He, um, well,
he's trying to write.
47
00:02:19,940 --> 00:02:21,609
Mm.
48
00:02:25,344 --> 00:02:27,146
So this is so weird.
49
00:02:27,180 --> 00:02:30,016
Um, I went
to Dr. Akoya today.
50
00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:31,184
She pregnant?
51
00:02:31,216 --> 00:02:32,651
Yeah.
52
00:02:32,685 --> 00:02:33,586
- Really?
- Oh, my God.
53
00:02:33,619 --> 00:02:34,887
I know.
That's annoying.
54
00:02:34,920 --> 00:02:37,089
- Why?
- I don't know.
55
00:02:37,121 --> 00:02:38,832
She should take
a leave of absence
when she's pregnant.
56
00:02:38,856 --> 00:02:41,593
- Why?
- I don't know.
57
00:02:41,625 --> 00:02:43,727
Oh, baby, are you pausing yet?
58
00:02:43,760 --> 00:02:46,329
No. Okay, so this
is the weird thing.
59
00:02:46,362 --> 00:02:47,598
I assumed, you know.
60
00:02:47,630 --> 00:02:49,899
I thought I was at
the end of the rope here,
61
00:02:49,932 --> 00:02:52,568
and I was kind of hoping that
she was going to say that.
62
00:02:52,601 --> 00:02:56,237
But apparently I have
the reproductive system
63
00:02:56,270 --> 00:02:58,172
of a 16-year-old. Like,
64
00:02:58,205 --> 00:03:00,908
my tubes are really good,
65
00:03:00,941 --> 00:03:03,410
and my eggs are still coming,
66
00:03:03,442 --> 00:03:07,179
and I'm fully functional
and productive
67
00:03:07,213 --> 00:03:10,583
and just the reproductive
system of a 16-year-old.
68
00:03:12,383 --> 00:03:13,418
Hmm.
69
00:03:14,785 --> 00:03:17,287
Did I fart? What's wrong?
70
00:03:19,489 --> 00:03:21,926
But your eggs are... fried.
71
00:03:21,958 --> 00:03:23,426
Right? I mean, they're...
rotten.
72
00:03:23,459 --> 00:03:26,763
It's not like you
can make anything.
73
00:03:26,795 --> 00:03:29,131
Um...
74
00:03:29,164 --> 00:03:31,266
Do you want to have a baby?
75
00:03:31,298 --> 00:03:33,735
- No. I just...
- Then why did you bring it up?
76
00:03:33,768 --> 00:03:35,870
I just thought it was funny.
77
00:03:35,903 --> 00:03:37,772
Oh. Well, it is.
It's funny.
78
00:03:39,172 --> 00:03:41,642
Um, okay.
79
00:03:41,675 --> 00:03:43,677
I think I'm going
to have the s'mores.
80
00:04:16,836 --> 00:04:18,638
As long as you're
doing all this,
81
00:04:18,672 --> 00:04:20,740
can you help me out
on the chin a little?
82
00:04:20,773 --> 00:04:22,107
Do I have to be an alien
83
00:04:22,140 --> 00:04:24,777
who's also an aging
lady with whiskers?
84
00:04:24,810 --> 00:04:26,845
Don't women
on the planet Zeepzop
85
00:04:26,878 --> 00:04:29,180
get electrolysis or whatever?
86
00:04:30,715 --> 00:04:32,717
No, but seriously, can you...
87
00:04:34,017 --> 00:04:35,752
Hi, Sam.
88
00:04:35,786 --> 00:04:38,454
Oh. Hi.
89
00:04:38,487 --> 00:04:41,523
So, um, this is just...
90
00:04:41,556 --> 00:04:43,192
I'm sorry,
but thank you so much.
91
00:04:43,224 --> 00:04:45,526
What?
92
00:04:45,559 --> 00:04:49,330
Uh, you can get out of
that make-up and go home.
93
00:04:49,362 --> 00:04:51,665
Home to the hotel?
94
00:04:51,699 --> 00:04:54,668
No.
Home to Los Angeles.
95
00:04:54,701 --> 00:04:56,869
Oh.
96
00:04:56,903 --> 00:04:59,305
Oh.
97
00:04:59,337 --> 00:05:01,272
Got it. I'm fired.
98
00:05:01,306 --> 00:05:02,674
No. Not exactly.
99
00:05:02,708 --> 00:05:04,109
They decided that
100
00:05:04,141 --> 00:05:05,719
instead of the Horvan
Crystal getting destroyed
101
00:05:05,743 --> 00:05:07,444
and then having to come
back to the planet
102
00:05:07,477 --> 00:05:08,889
to seek the source,
they're just going to go
103
00:05:08,913 --> 00:05:10,848
straight to the Peevan Galaxy.
104
00:05:10,880 --> 00:05:12,315
Oh. No. Totally.
105
00:05:12,348 --> 00:05:14,784
Also, we, uh, would
really appreciate it
106
00:05:14,818 --> 00:05:17,153
if you didn't divulge
any of the story points
to the public
107
00:05:17,185 --> 00:05:19,688
or post any selfies
while still in make-up.
108
00:05:21,088 --> 00:05:22,489
Copy that.
109
00:05:22,523 --> 00:05:23,858
Hi.
110
00:05:25,159 --> 00:05:26,694
Can we smoke in your cab?
111
00:05:30,263 --> 00:05:32,365
How many kids
do you have, Curtis?
112
00:05:32,397 --> 00:05:34,133
I got four kids, man.
113
00:05:34,166 --> 00:05:35,835
Are any of them named Curtis?
114
00:05:35,868 --> 00:05:38,070
Uh-huh. No, them all
girl, you see,
115
00:05:38,102 --> 00:05:40,504
but I'm on working on
getting me a Curtis,
116
00:05:40,538 --> 00:05:43,474
and I will not quit
until I get me one.
117
00:05:44,607 --> 00:05:46,676
So how many kids
you got, darling?
118
00:05:46,710 --> 00:05:48,545
I have three girls.
119
00:05:48,577 --> 00:05:49,879
Is the daddy a good man?
120
00:05:49,912 --> 00:05:52,715
Um... uh...
121
00:05:52,749 --> 00:05:54,250
I get the picture.
122
00:05:54,282 --> 00:05:55,817
That's why, cuz, I will never,
123
00:05:55,851 --> 00:05:57,318
never leave my children.
124
00:05:57,352 --> 00:05:58,920
Never.
125
00:05:58,953 --> 00:06:01,588
Yeah, so you get to
tuck them in every night,
126
00:06:01,621 --> 00:06:02,823
right, Daddy?
127
00:06:02,857 --> 00:06:05,726
Soon come.
They live in Jamaica.
128
00:06:10,628 --> 00:06:12,064
- Yoo-hoo!
- Hi, Mom.
129
00:06:12,097 --> 00:06:13,866
- Hello, darling.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
130
00:06:13,899 --> 00:06:15,367
- Hi.
- Don't come over here.
131
00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:16,711
Don't come over here.
Don't come...
132
00:06:16,734 --> 00:06:18,903
Have a good day, Mom.
133
00:06:18,936 --> 00:06:20,504
- What are you doing?
- I got to go...
134
00:06:20,537 --> 00:06:21,839
What are you doing?
135
00:06:21,872 --> 00:06:24,207
I just got back from
working in Canada.
136
00:06:24,240 --> 00:06:27,543
Canada? You know, it's legal
to be a prostitute there.
137
00:06:27,576 --> 00:06:28,744
Fascinating, isn't it?
138
00:06:28,778 --> 00:06:30,512
If you're not a child.
139
00:06:30,545 --> 00:06:32,915
It's illegal to pay
for a prostitute,
140
00:06:32,947 --> 00:06:34,715
but it's legal to be one.
141
00:06:34,749 --> 00:06:37,952
Oh. Good. Well, anyway...
142
00:06:37,985 --> 00:06:41,955
they let me go
a day early, so...
143
00:06:41,989 --> 00:06:43,957
Where are the girls?
144
00:06:43,990 --> 00:06:45,758
Well, I assume they're here,
145
00:06:45,792 --> 00:06:48,227
although they don't answer
their phones to torture me.
146
00:06:48,260 --> 00:06:49,595
Susie's with them.
147
00:06:49,627 --> 00:06:51,763
Oh. Why didn't you
ask me to watch them
148
00:06:51,797 --> 00:06:53,531
- when you were gone?
- Oh, that's okay.
149
00:06:53,564 --> 00:06:54,866
Well, anyway, it's impossible,
150
00:06:54,899 --> 00:06:55,766
because I couldn't have done,
151
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:57,601
because we had
a neighborhood watch meeting
152
00:06:57,634 --> 00:06:59,369
to discuss disaster response.
153
00:06:59,402 --> 00:07:01,938
Mom, I want to go inside now.
154
00:07:01,971 --> 00:07:03,406
Yes. I know, but...
155
00:07:03,439 --> 00:07:04,573
- Okay.
- Hold on a minute
156
00:07:04,607 --> 00:07:05,818
because what I wanted
to tell you
157
00:07:05,841 --> 00:07:08,410
was that I'm
building up my muscles.
158
00:07:08,443 --> 00:07:09,778
And look.
Look at my arm.
159
00:07:09,812 --> 00:07:11,880
- That's good. Good.
- No, look. Feel it.
160
00:07:11,913 --> 00:07:13,647
- Nope.
- Because what's interesting
161
00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:15,582
is that my nail is falling off,
162
00:07:15,616 --> 00:07:16,960
- and that's disgusting.
- No. Mom, I don't...
163
00:07:16,983 --> 00:07:18,985
But my muscles are really,
really good.
164
00:07:19,019 --> 00:07:20,386
- Go on, feel them, Sam.
- No, no.
165
00:07:20,420 --> 00:07:21,654
Let me see yours, then.
166
00:07:21,686 --> 00:07:23,989
No, Mom! I don't want
to stand outside
167
00:07:24,023 --> 00:07:27,592
and compare bodies with you
like we're grooming chimps.
168
00:07:28,927 --> 00:07:30,328
I'm sorry.
169
00:07:30,361 --> 00:07:32,430
Time to go home now, though.
170
00:07:33,864 --> 00:07:35,565
You certainly told me.
171
00:07:35,598 --> 00:07:37,334
Yes. Home. Now.
172
00:07:37,367 --> 00:07:38,635
All right.
173
00:07:42,604 --> 00:07:43,605
Oh.
174
00:07:54,313 --> 00:07:55,815
Oh, shit.
175
00:07:59,385 --> 00:08:00,854
Oh, shit.
176
00:08:00,886 --> 00:08:02,988
Hello.
177
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:32,379
No, Mom. I mean, you
weren't even supposed
to be home today.
178
00:08:32,412 --> 00:08:33,947
We would have cleaned it all up.
179
00:08:33,980 --> 00:08:36,115
This... This doesn't
even count.
180
00:08:36,148 --> 00:08:37,549
Sam?
181
00:08:39,417 --> 00:08:40,952
Hi, Susie.
182
00:08:40,986 --> 00:08:42,287
Hi.
183
00:08:42,320 --> 00:08:45,290
Susie, I didn't mean it.
184
00:08:45,322 --> 00:08:46,991
I didn't mean hi.
185
00:08:47,024 --> 00:08:49,059
Sorry.
186
00:08:49,092 --> 00:08:51,394
Where is Duke?
187
00:08:51,427 --> 00:08:52,896
Duke is sleeping at Lam's house,
188
00:08:52,929 --> 00:08:54,697
and Max...
189
00:08:54,729 --> 00:08:57,699
Oh, no, no, I don't give a shit
where Max is right now.
190
00:08:57,732 --> 00:08:59,834
Mom, you're freakazoid.
191
00:08:59,868 --> 00:09:01,236
Please stop freaking out
192
00:09:01,268 --> 00:09:03,504
so we don't have to send you
to a mental hospital.
193
00:09:03,537 --> 00:09:04,838
This is what I'm going to do.
194
00:09:04,872 --> 00:09:06,740
I'm going to go upstairs
and take a long nap,
195
00:09:06,772 --> 00:09:08,641
like Susie got to,
196
00:09:08,674 --> 00:09:11,844
and then I'm going
to come downstairs,
197
00:09:11,877 --> 00:09:13,545
and all of this is going
to be cleaned up.
198
00:09:13,578 --> 00:09:16,916
Mom, I can't.
I have soccer, remember?
199
00:09:16,948 --> 00:09:19,083
Are you taking me to soccer?
200
00:09:19,117 --> 00:09:20,684
I'll take her.
201
00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:27,524
Hello.
202
00:09:27,556 --> 00:09:29,091
Hi, Mom.
203
00:09:29,125 --> 00:09:30,927
Hello, darling.
204
00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:32,694
Uh, tell me about your muscles
205
00:09:32,728 --> 00:09:34,096
and the water thing.
206
00:09:34,129 --> 00:09:36,564
You can do it now if you want.
207
00:09:36,597 --> 00:09:41,102
Oh. Well, you know
Marshall Sanders.
208
00:09:41,135 --> 00:09:42,036
Uh, well, he's
209
00:09:42,069 --> 00:09:43,670
the watch commander,
210
00:09:43,703 --> 00:09:47,007
and his wife died last year,
211
00:09:47,040 --> 00:09:49,108
and I don't know whether
I'm making it up,
212
00:09:49,142 --> 00:09:51,444
but I think he's got
his eye on me
213
00:09:51,476 --> 00:09:54,112
because do you remember
how he looked at me
in the grocery store?
214
00:09:54,146 --> 00:09:55,914
And then I thought to myself,
215
00:09:55,947 --> 00:09:59,016
God, "watch commander"...
Aptly named.
216
00:09:59,050 --> 00:10:00,060
But I might be wrong.
Anyway,
217
00:10:00,084 --> 00:10:01,352
but the thing is,
218
00:10:01,384 --> 00:10:03,086
I was very, very pleased
219
00:10:03,119 --> 00:10:05,188
that he chose me to be
in charge of water
220
00:10:05,221 --> 00:10:07,357
because I thought it was
quite a responsible position,
221
00:10:07,389 --> 00:10:09,891
don't you think?
It is, isn't it?
222
00:10:09,925 --> 00:10:13,128
And so I've got to be
very on the ball
223
00:10:13,161 --> 00:10:14,728
in case there's an earthquake.
224
00:10:14,762 --> 00:10:16,106
Um, and then he'll
be pleased with me,
225
00:10:16,130 --> 00:10:17,231
don't you think?
226
00:10:18,598 --> 00:10:20,133
Anyway,
227
00:10:20,167 --> 00:10:22,970
so the doctor says
I'm losing muscle mass,
228
00:10:23,002 --> 00:10:24,770
- but he's a liar.
- Uh-huh.
229
00:10:24,803 --> 00:10:26,973
And he can't tell me
what's happening to my body
230
00:10:27,006 --> 00:10:28,707
because I know.
231
00:10:28,739 --> 00:10:32,477
So I'm trying to decide
if I should sue him.
232
00:10:32,510 --> 00:10:34,579
What do you think?
233
00:10:34,611 --> 00:10:36,213
And then he'd stop.
234
00:10:45,787 --> 00:10:47,222
Phil.
235
00:10:47,255 --> 00:10:48,623
Yes, darling?
236
00:10:48,656 --> 00:10:50,425
Do you have any vodka?
237
00:10:50,457 --> 00:10:52,593
I always have vodka.
238
00:11:00,166 --> 00:11:01,834
What was the name of the man
239
00:11:01,866 --> 00:11:04,069
that you were dating
when you met my dad?
240
00:11:07,005 --> 00:11:08,606
Audrey.
241
00:11:08,639 --> 00:11:09,940
That's right.
242
00:11:09,974 --> 00:11:12,110
That's amazing. Audrey.
243
00:11:12,142 --> 00:11:13,176
Hmm.
244
00:11:13,210 --> 00:11:15,778
He swept me off my feet.
245
00:11:15,812 --> 00:11:17,947
Then why didn't you marry him?
246
00:11:17,980 --> 00:11:20,249
Oh, no, no.
You don't marry the man
247
00:11:20,282 --> 00:11:22,151
who sweeps you off your feet.
248
00:11:22,184 --> 00:11:24,153
You marry the man
who pulls you back down
249
00:11:24,185 --> 00:11:25,353
and grounds you,
250
00:11:25,386 --> 00:11:26,988
takes care of you.
251
00:11:28,222 --> 00:11:29,623
My dad.
252
00:11:29,656 --> 00:11:31,491
No.
253
00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:34,461
What do you mean?
254
00:11:34,493 --> 00:11:39,332
I met Audrey in 1960,
255
00:11:39,364 --> 00:11:43,035
and I fell in love immediately.
256
00:11:43,068 --> 00:11:47,272
And he took me to New Zealand
to live by a vineyard
257
00:11:47,304 --> 00:11:52,776
while he picked grapes
for about five cents a pound.
258
00:11:52,808 --> 00:11:55,278
And then I met Joseph,
259
00:11:55,311 --> 00:11:57,380
and he was
an American businessman.
260
00:11:57,412 --> 00:12:00,382
He was very small and serious.
261
00:12:00,415 --> 00:12:02,017
And he saw me in the Village,
262
00:12:02,050 --> 00:12:06,187
and he said,
"I'm gonna marry you,"
263
00:12:06,220 --> 00:12:09,057
and told me how much he made
264
00:12:09,089 --> 00:12:11,791
and he could provide for me,
265
00:12:11,824 --> 00:12:14,994
and so I grew up,
266
00:12:15,027 --> 00:12:17,496
and I said yes to Joseph.
267
00:12:17,529 --> 00:12:19,698
What the hell?
268
00:12:19,730 --> 00:12:23,034
What the hell, Mom.
I don't know this story.
269
00:12:23,068 --> 00:12:24,635
What happened to Joseph?
270
00:12:24,668 --> 00:12:27,637
Well, we were getting ready
271
00:12:27,671 --> 00:12:29,806
to go back to the States
to get married,
272
00:12:29,838 --> 00:12:32,475
and I said good-bye
to Audrey.
273
00:12:32,508 --> 00:12:37,012
But then Joseph died.
274
00:12:39,281 --> 00:12:42,184
Jesus. He died?
275
00:12:42,216 --> 00:12:44,218
He drowned.
276
00:12:44,251 --> 00:12:47,888
He got drunk
and fell in a puddle.
277
00:12:47,920 --> 00:12:50,156
Well, it was raining.
278
00:12:50,190 --> 00:12:53,259
And so then
I went back to Audrey.
279
00:12:53,292 --> 00:12:56,928
And then two years later,
I met your father.
280
00:13:02,065 --> 00:13:05,102
So why did you marry my dad?
281
00:13:07,569 --> 00:13:09,271
I don't know.
282
00:13:09,305 --> 00:13:11,240
Why'd you marry him?
283
00:13:11,273 --> 00:13:12,741
I don't know...
284
00:13:12,773 --> 00:13:14,142
Why'd you marry my dad?
285
00:13:55,609 --> 00:13:58,579
So are you ever gonna
say something?
286
00:13:58,611 --> 00:14:01,214
About what?
287
00:14:01,248 --> 00:14:02,582
Oh, my God. Nothing.
288
00:14:04,416 --> 00:14:06,652
Are you ever gonna
say something?
289
00:14:06,685 --> 00:14:08,086
About what?
290
00:14:08,119 --> 00:14:10,455
Oh! About my dad leaving.
291
00:14:10,488 --> 00:14:13,158
What?
292
00:14:13,190 --> 00:14:14,791
Yeah, I didn't think so.
293
00:14:17,127 --> 00:14:19,729
Max, you had a party.
294
00:14:19,762 --> 00:14:22,598
No, it wasn't a party.
And anyway, you left.
295
00:14:22,631 --> 00:14:27,336
- I had to work.
- God, you don't
have to work, Mom.
296
00:14:27,369 --> 00:14:32,006
What? How do you think
we ever have anything?
297
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:35,742
You work because
you want to be famous.
298
00:14:35,775 --> 00:14:38,511
Dad told me. You have tons
of money in savings,
299
00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:42,014
and he is living like shit.
300
00:14:42,046 --> 00:14:44,483
This is so unfair that
I think I'm gonna pass out.
301
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:47,186
Oh, my God.
Yeah, Mom, you're the victim.
302
00:14:47,218 --> 00:14:48,452
Everything is unfair.
303
00:14:54,056 --> 00:14:56,993
Max, I try like hell
304
00:14:57,025 --> 00:14:58,994
to be fair to your father
305
00:14:59,027 --> 00:15:00,596
and not put you in the middle.
306
00:15:00,629 --> 00:15:03,832
I'm human, but I do try that.
307
00:15:03,864 --> 00:15:05,633
But you're 16 now,
308
00:15:05,666 --> 00:15:09,136
and that's old enough
to know how unfair it is
309
00:15:09,169 --> 00:15:11,438
what you just said to me.
310
00:15:11,471 --> 00:15:14,208
You know, it really disgusts me
311
00:15:14,240 --> 00:15:16,442
how you will sometimes
say anything
312
00:15:16,475 --> 00:15:19,945
to avoid responsibility
for your mistakes.
313
00:15:19,977 --> 00:15:22,013
You had a party,
314
00:15:22,046 --> 00:15:25,350
and you wrecked the house.
315
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:27,384
You're not the first kid
to do that.
316
00:15:27,418 --> 00:15:29,620
It's not the end of the world.
317
00:15:29,653 --> 00:15:33,190
Then why are you acting
like it is?
318
00:15:33,223 --> 00:15:35,658
Because you make me get this mad
319
00:15:35,690 --> 00:15:39,861
before you even look up
from your phone!
320
00:15:39,894 --> 00:15:42,364
And you act like
your shit don't stink
321
00:15:42,396 --> 00:15:43,964
and you shouldn't answer
for anything.
322
00:15:43,997 --> 00:15:45,165
But you know what, baby?
323
00:15:45,199 --> 00:15:47,235
Your shit does stink.
324
00:15:47,267 --> 00:15:50,403
And your father
lives better than I do!
325
00:15:50,437 --> 00:15:52,439
And I pay for all of it!
326
00:16:03,247 --> 00:16:04,848
Answer your phone.
327
00:16:08,451 --> 00:16:10,386
Hello?
328
00:16:10,419 --> 00:16:12,697
If you can meet me somewhere
tomorrow at ten in the morning,
329
00:16:12,721 --> 00:16:15,258
then we can do it
maybe even twice.
330
00:16:15,290 --> 00:16:16,291
I have a meeting at noon.
331
00:16:18,360 --> 00:16:20,228
Yes, I will be there then.
332
00:16:21,795 --> 00:16:23,264
Bye.
333
00:16:32,704 --> 00:16:34,005
20 years since they were kids,
334
00:16:34,038 --> 00:16:35,350
they never left, they let...
It's like this amazing story.
335
00:16:35,374 --> 00:16:37,242
So I asked
if I could do my project,
336
00:16:37,275 --> 00:16:39,519
like, I have three of
my friends stay in my basement
for, like, a month.
337
00:16:39,543 --> 00:16:42,280
And then we all write
about it afterwards to
see what it felt like.
338
00:16:42,312 --> 00:16:45,014
And it was like...
Mom, are you listening?
339
00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:49,051
- Yes. What? Tell me.
- Ugh! Mom, listen.
340
00:16:49,084 --> 00:16:51,429
- Okay, go.
- I'm telling you about
this because it's important!
341
00:16:51,453 --> 00:16:53,289
Frankie, don't speak
to your mother like that!
342
00:16:53,321 --> 00:16:55,532
Ugh! Anyway, my teacher was
like, "No, you can't do that."
343
00:16:55,556 --> 00:16:57,124
But I was like,
"Oh, This is just so...
344
00:16:57,157 --> 00:16:59,294
- Mommy, I don't
get what this is.
- Oh, my God!
345
00:16:59,326 --> 00:17:00,794
- Frankie!
- Hey!
346
00:17:00,827 --> 00:17:02,396
Stop. Save it for later.
347
00:17:02,429 --> 00:17:05,432
Oh, I want to kill everybody.
348
00:17:05,464 --> 00:17:08,301
- Calm down.
- Mommy, what is this
ever gonna do?
349
00:17:08,334 --> 00:17:10,745
It's this women
and girls empowerment thing,
and it's annoying.
350
00:17:10,768 --> 00:17:13,438
Women and girls empowerment
is annoying?
351
00:17:13,471 --> 00:17:15,106
It is the way my school does it.
352
00:17:15,138 --> 00:17:17,308
The people get up there
and they talk and they ruin it.
353
00:17:17,341 --> 00:17:19,876
Oh, well,
I'll try not to ruin it.
354
00:17:19,909 --> 00:17:21,877
Now, come on,
we're here for your mother.
355
00:17:21,911 --> 00:17:23,479
- No, we're not.
- Yes, we are.
356
00:17:23,513 --> 00:17:25,381
Hey, Patty.
357
00:17:25,414 --> 00:17:28,049
Sam, thank God you're here.
358
00:17:28,082 --> 00:17:29,551
Hi, Miss Donner.
Donner, Donner...
359
00:17:29,584 --> 00:17:31,386
Did you think
I wasn't gonna come?
360
00:17:31,419 --> 00:17:33,454
Well, two of my speakers
flaked on me.
361
00:17:33,487 --> 00:17:35,489
- Oh, my God.
- I'm gonna start.
362
00:17:35,523 --> 00:17:38,459
- Okay, so who's on first?
- It's just you.
363
00:17:38,491 --> 00:17:41,260
- Oh, shit.
- Darling!
364
00:17:41,294 --> 00:17:43,062
Okay? I'm starting.
365
00:17:43,094 --> 00:17:45,397
- Donner, Donner,
Donner, Donner.
- God!
366
00:17:45,431 --> 00:17:48,667
I am so happy you all could come
367
00:17:48,699 --> 00:17:53,304
to our women and girls
empowerment seminar.
368
00:17:53,337 --> 00:17:55,672
We have one guest speaker.
369
00:17:55,705 --> 00:17:58,342
And tonight she's gonna speak
about being a mom
370
00:17:58,374 --> 00:18:02,144
- and having a career.
- Nobody cares.
371
00:18:02,177 --> 00:18:06,749
Please welcome
our very own Sam Fox.
372
00:18:06,781 --> 00:18:09,216
Oof.
373
00:18:11,985 --> 00:18:14,287
Yeah, Mom! Go, Mom!
374
00:18:22,561 --> 00:18:25,664
Thank you, Patty.
375
00:18:25,696 --> 00:18:28,532
Um, well...
376
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:32,370
I work and I am a mom.
377
00:18:32,402 --> 00:18:35,672
And some of you might
later in life
378
00:18:35,705 --> 00:18:40,777
find yourselves in
the same situation, I hope.
379
00:18:40,809 --> 00:18:46,615
Because you girls can be
anything you want.
380
00:18:46,647 --> 00:18:48,449
You know, when I was a girl,
381
00:18:48,482 --> 00:18:50,984
no one ever really said
that women had jobs,
382
00:18:51,017 --> 00:18:54,187
except Marlo Thomas
and Mary Tyler Moore.
383
00:18:54,219 --> 00:18:57,990
Thank you, Henry.
384
00:18:58,023 --> 00:19:02,160
But, uh...
385
00:19:02,193 --> 00:19:03,895
we can do it all!
386
00:19:03,927 --> 00:19:06,963
And we have to do it all,
because in the end,
387
00:19:06,997 --> 00:19:11,602
the mom, the women,
are the ones left watching.
388
00:19:18,773 --> 00:19:20,341
Okay, this is...
389
00:19:23,076 --> 00:19:25,513
Let me ask you all a question.
390
00:19:25,546 --> 00:19:29,517
How many girls out there
get your period?
391
00:19:31,249 --> 00:19:32,551
Yeah, you heard me.
392
00:19:32,584 --> 00:19:37,756
If anybody here has got their
period yet, put your hand up.
393
00:19:37,788 --> 00:19:39,424
Put your hand up.
It's okay.
394
00:19:39,457 --> 00:19:41,225
It's okay.
395
00:19:41,258 --> 00:19:43,193
Who's cotton-holing?
396
00:19:43,226 --> 00:19:44,494
I know, gross.
397
00:19:44,528 --> 00:19:47,030
But we're all girls
and women here.
398
00:19:47,063 --> 00:19:48,432
It's just us.
399
00:19:48,464 --> 00:19:52,435
So come on, Frankie,
help me out.
400
00:19:52,468 --> 00:19:55,270
- Mom!
- Come on, raise your hand.
401
00:19:55,302 --> 00:19:57,204
Listen, Frankie and I
went through it last week.
402
00:19:57,238 --> 00:20:01,175
She was stealing her sister's
tampons for half a year
before she told me.
403
00:20:01,207 --> 00:20:03,043
- Mom!
- Frankie.
404
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:04,445
Be a leader.
Get your hand up.
405
00:20:04,477 --> 00:20:06,712
- Mom!
- Help 'em out.
406
00:20:08,448 --> 00:20:10,082
Good girl! There!
407
00:20:10,114 --> 00:20:13,084
Anybody else? Who else here?
Who's bleeding?
408
00:20:13,117 --> 00:20:16,788
There you go! Good! So brave!
409
00:20:16,820 --> 00:20:18,889
Come on, moms,
let's hear it for them.
410
00:20:18,922 --> 00:20:23,861
All right, who here has
not gotten their period yet?
411
00:20:23,893 --> 00:20:25,595
Wow! Okay!
412
00:20:25,628 --> 00:20:28,798
Well, you girls are in for it.
You really are.
413
00:20:28,830 --> 00:20:31,099
But we all got your backs,
right?
414
00:20:31,132 --> 00:20:34,636
Who here is having
their period right now?
415
00:20:34,669 --> 00:20:37,104
I know I am!
Can you tell?
416
00:20:37,136 --> 00:20:38,705
All right! Thank you!
417
00:20:38,738 --> 00:20:41,274
Mrs. Donner! Yeah!
418
00:20:41,307 --> 00:20:44,578
Moms? Thank you!
Hands, hands.
419
00:20:44,610 --> 00:20:47,312
Sisters all!
420
00:20:47,345 --> 00:20:53,218
Who here has stopped getting
their period altogether?
421
00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:56,087
Aunt Flo has left
the station forever.
422
00:20:57,488 --> 00:21:00,356
Mom. Mom.
423
00:21:03,659 --> 00:21:05,227
Thank you!
424
00:21:05,259 --> 00:21:07,962
Thank you for that!
Thank you!
425
00:21:11,532 --> 00:21:14,434
Look, we're all girls,
and we're all women.
426
00:21:14,468 --> 00:21:17,471
And we all bleed,
and we all suffer.
427
00:21:17,504 --> 00:21:21,273
And then the bleeding stops,
and we still suffer.
428
00:21:21,306 --> 00:21:22,808
But you're gonna find
your own path,
429
00:21:22,841 --> 00:21:26,111
because we're tough,
and we can take it.
430
00:21:26,144 --> 00:21:28,480
And as long as you believe
in yourself,
431
00:21:28,513 --> 00:21:31,248
and you take care of each other
432
00:21:31,281 --> 00:21:32,750
and watch out for each other,
433
00:21:32,782 --> 00:21:35,284
you just make the rest up
as you go along.
434
00:21:35,318 --> 00:21:37,020
That's all there is to it.
435
00:21:37,053 --> 00:21:39,656
That's it! Thank you!
436
00:21:39,688 --> 00:21:42,090
Thank you!
Thank you, Detroit!
437
00:21:50,631 --> 00:21:53,500
Good job, Mom.
Also, I hate you.
438
00:21:53,534 --> 00:21:55,502
I know.
It's okay.
439
00:22:10,813 --> 00:22:12,982
- Okay.
- Yeah.
440
00:22:14,216 --> 00:22:15,518
Do you have a condom?
441
00:22:18,086 --> 00:22:20,488
- No.
- You need to use a condom.
442
00:22:24,659 --> 00:22:26,694
You never asked me before.
443
00:22:26,727 --> 00:22:28,195
I know.
444
00:22:30,029 --> 00:22:31,364
Shit.
445
00:22:31,397 --> 00:22:34,968
Wait, wait.
I'll be right back.
446
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:36,501
Stay.
30612
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