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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:07,100 --> 00:00:08,570 - I want to go to the meatball shop. 2 00:00:08,567 --> 00:00:10,327 - We're not going to the meatball shop. It's-- 3 00:00:10,333 --> 00:00:13,103 - Is that Dave and John Mulaney coming out of Katz's? 4 00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:14,400 - That's your and Dave's place. 5 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:16,400 Wait, maybe we should go a different direction. 6 00:00:16,400 --> 00:00:19,030 - No, it's too late. They--they saw us. 7 00:00:19,033 --> 00:00:20,603 Act like we're together. 8 00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:21,470 - What? - Hey. 9 00:00:21,467 --> 00:00:22,527 - Hey. - Oh, hey. 10 00:00:22,533 --> 00:00:23,903 - How's it going? - Jim. 11 00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:27,670 - Hey. Well, we--I was just using the bathroom. 12 00:00:27,667 --> 00:00:29,167 You guys going in or-- 13 00:00:29,167 --> 00:00:32,127 - No. No, we're--we're going to look at an apartment. 14 00:00:32,133 --> 00:00:34,833 - Oh. 15 00:00:34,833 --> 00:00:39,233 - Um, oh, Jeannie, this is m--John, my partner. 16 00:00:39,233 --> 00:00:40,773 Uh, writing partner. 17 00:00:40,767 --> 00:00:43,027 - Nice to meet you. - Nice to meet you. 18 00:00:43,033 --> 00:00:44,803 I really like your scarf. 19 00:00:44,800 --> 00:00:46,530 - Oh, thank you. 20 00:00:46,533 --> 00:00:48,333 You know, I got it on Elizabeth Street. 21 00:00:48,333 --> 00:00:51,033 There's this really cute, like, scarves and candles store 22 00:00:51,033 --> 00:00:52,673 and they have cats. Like, cat treats. 23 00:00:52,667 --> 00:00:57,727 There's a cat named Eleanor who sits there all day, like... 24 00:00:57,733 --> 00:00:59,173 - Well, we should go. 25 00:00:59,167 --> 00:01:01,227 - How--how you been? You been all right? 26 00:01:01,233 --> 00:01:04,303 - Good, good, good. And you? 27 00:01:04,300 --> 00:01:05,770 - I'm also doing great. 28 00:01:05,767 --> 00:01:07,267 - Yeah, he's headlining Carolines tonight 29 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:11,567 and I'm opening for him. 30 00:01:11,567 --> 00:01:15,197 - Oh, well, I'll see you around. 31 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:16,470 - Dave got you banned from Carolines 32 00:01:16,467 --> 00:01:18,067 and now he's headlining? 33 00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:20,367 - He's got a TV deal. That's how it works. 34 00:01:20,367 --> 00:01:23,267 - John Mulaney liked my scarf. 35 00:01:23,267 --> 00:01:26,267 ["Love Hurts" by Nazareth] 36 00:01:26,267 --> 00:01:29,297 * 37 00:01:29,300 --> 00:01:32,270 - * Love hurts 38 00:01:32,267 --> 00:01:35,297 * Love scars 39 00:01:35,300 --> 00:01:36,900 * Love wounds 40 00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:38,570 [horn honks] 41 00:01:38,567 --> 00:01:43,397 - Voilà, the upstairs is divided into several bedrooms. 42 00:01:43,400 --> 00:01:44,930 - This is unbelievable. 43 00:01:44,933 --> 00:01:46,233 - H--how much is this place? 44 00:01:46,233 --> 00:01:49,203 - And wait until you see this. 45 00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:52,300 * Ba-ba! 46 00:01:52,300 --> 00:01:56,230 - This kitchen is bigger than our entire living room. 47 00:01:56,233 --> 00:01:57,403 An outdoor space! 48 00:01:57,400 --> 00:01:59,270 - Yeah. - How much is it? 49 00:01:59,267 --> 00:02:01,067 - And that is the city park, 50 00:02:01,067 --> 00:02:03,627 so they can never put up buildings and ruin your view. 51 00:02:03,633 --> 00:02:05,773 - I see our children playing, 52 00:02:05,767 --> 00:02:08,867 and I'm watching them through this window 53 00:02:08,867 --> 00:02:10,467 while I make my own pasta, 54 00:02:10,467 --> 00:02:12,367 and I'm seasoning it with herbs 55 00:02:12,367 --> 00:02:15,567 from--from my own herb garden right there, 56 00:02:15,567 --> 00:02:17,367 and there's--and there's places 57 00:02:17,367 --> 00:02:19,397 where we can build snowmen in the winter 58 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:21,330 and come right inside again for hot chocolate 59 00:02:21,333 --> 00:02:24,433 and in the summertime, fresh flowers! 60 00:02:24,433 --> 00:02:28,973 And a gigantic blueberry bush. 61 00:02:28,967 --> 00:02:30,797 And a baby pool! 62 00:02:30,800 --> 00:02:32,230 - How much is it? 63 00:02:32,233 --> 00:02:33,433 - Don't worry about it. 64 00:02:33,433 --> 00:02:35,303 - This is everything we have ever wanted. 65 00:02:35,300 --> 00:02:38,470 It--it's like we're in the city but we're not in the city. 66 00:02:38,467 --> 00:02:40,897 A suburban home but not in the suburbs. 67 00:02:40,900 --> 00:02:42,270 - What is the asking price? 68 00:02:42,267 --> 00:02:43,667 - See, that's the thing-- 69 00:02:46,067 --> 00:02:47,127 - What? 70 00:02:47,133 --> 00:02:48,303 - They're very motivated. 71 00:02:48,300 --> 00:02:51,430 - [scoffs] Cruel. 72 00:02:54,967 --> 00:02:57,897 - [laughs] 73 00:03:01,100 --> 00:03:03,230 I love New York! 74 00:03:03,233 --> 00:03:04,603 Yeah! 75 00:03:04,600 --> 00:03:06,400 - Why would you even show us this place? 76 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:07,600 We could never afford it. 77 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:08,770 - Oh, you can always make a bid. 78 00:03:08,767 --> 00:03:10,897 - Yeah, I can always win Powerball. 79 00:03:10,900 --> 00:03:13,730 - Jim, you live in a two-bedroom apartment with five children. 80 00:03:13,733 --> 00:03:15,603 You're not an old lady who lives in a shoe. 81 00:03:15,600 --> 00:03:16,800 It is time for an upgrade. 82 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:17,830 [phone vibrates] 83 00:03:17,833 --> 00:03:18,973 - Please. 84 00:03:18,967 --> 00:03:20,597 Hey, Stevie. 85 00:03:20,600 --> 00:03:23,070 - Did you see last night's "Dancing With the Stars"? 86 00:03:23,067 --> 00:03:24,767 - Barbecue. - No. 87 00:03:24,767 --> 00:03:26,797 - Who knew Joe Biden could jitterbug? 88 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:28,800 - I--is this why you're calling me? 89 00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,770 - No. Guess who wants to have a meeting with you? 90 00:03:31,767 --> 00:03:32,667 - Who? 91 00:03:32,667 --> 00:03:34,067 - No, I want you to guess. 92 00:03:34,067 --> 00:03:35,327 - Uh, I don't want to guess. 93 00:03:35,333 --> 00:03:36,333 Just tell me who. 94 00:03:36,333 --> 00:03:38,433 - Come on. 95 00:03:38,433 --> 00:03:40,273 - I don't know. A real agent? 96 00:03:40,267 --> 00:03:41,967 - No, silly. I'm your agent. 97 00:03:41,967 --> 00:03:44,727 You have a meeting with Will Ferrell. 98 00:03:44,733 --> 00:03:45,973 - Will Ferrell? 99 00:03:45,967 --> 00:03:47,427 - Yes, he wants to have a meeting with you 100 00:03:47,433 --> 00:03:49,173 on Monday in LA. 101 00:03:49,167 --> 00:03:50,567 - Monday? LA? 102 00:03:50,567 --> 00:03:52,767 - Called to ask when you would be in LA next. 103 00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:55,267 I know you have nothing so I said Monday. 104 00:03:55,267 --> 00:03:56,527 - But--but I'm in New York. 105 00:03:56,533 --> 00:03:58,633 W--what's the meeting about? 106 00:03:58,633 --> 00:04:00,803 - Who knows? This is a big opportunity. 107 00:04:00,800 --> 00:04:03,470 Pitch him something. A movie, a show. 108 00:04:03,467 --> 00:04:06,197 - I--I can pitch him my weatherman sitcom. 109 00:04:06,200 --> 00:04:07,600 - Or some other idea. 110 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:09,800 - You don't like the weatherman show? 111 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:11,900 - I love it. It's funny, right? 112 00:04:11,900 --> 00:04:14,070 - Yeah, it's funny. It's a comedy. 113 00:04:14,067 --> 00:04:16,567 You know, just email me the where and when 114 00:04:16,567 --> 00:04:17,567 and I'll be there. 115 00:04:17,567 --> 00:04:20,527 Thanks. Bye. 116 00:04:20,533 --> 00:04:21,803 - Jim, we heard the whole thing. 117 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:23,170 Will Ferrell? 118 00:04:23,167 --> 00:04:24,667 Jim, you're gonna meet with Will Ferrell? 119 00:04:24,667 --> 00:04:26,597 Are you nervous? Don't be nervous. 120 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,170 Are you going to be funny? 121 00:04:28,167 --> 00:04:29,667 - Oh, that's a good idea. You should try to be funny, Jim. 122 00:04:29,667 --> 00:04:30,767 - Look, I'm just going to talk to him. 123 00:04:30,767 --> 00:04:32,327 He's a comedian like me. 124 00:04:32,333 --> 00:04:35,073 - He's not just a comedian. - No, no, no, no, no. 125 00:04:35,067 --> 00:04:37,067 - He's like a movie star. He's like a comedy icon. 126 00:04:37,067 --> 00:04:38,767 - Jim, okay, this is big. 127 00:04:38,767 --> 00:04:40,567 You could finally give your wife and kids a good life. 128 00:04:40,567 --> 00:04:41,797 Don't blow it, Jim. 129 00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:43,600 - You know what? I loved "Anchorman." 130 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:45,630 I think he started Funny or Die. 131 00:04:45,633 --> 00:04:47,733 - He's funny and he's rich, 132 00:04:47,733 --> 00:04:49,703 so he's like the opposite of you, Jim. 133 00:04:49,700 --> 00:04:51,330 - Just don't get nervous. 134 00:04:51,333 --> 00:04:53,703 When you get nervous then you get that dot on your face. 135 00:04:53,700 --> 00:04:54,900 - It's more like a splotch. - It's like a blister and-- 136 00:04:54,900 --> 00:04:56,500 - And it grows. 137 00:04:56,500 --> 00:04:58,200 - And it gets bigger and bigger and then you're not funny. 138 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:01,130 - Would you two stop? I'm gonna be fine. 139 00:05:01,133 --> 00:05:03,803 Why would I be nervous? I've got a great idea. 140 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:06,900 I'm gonna pitch him the weatherman sitcom. 141 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:08,500 Remember? 142 00:05:08,500 --> 00:05:09,670 - Or something else. 143 00:05:09,667 --> 00:05:12,867 [man beatboxing] 144 00:05:12,867 --> 00:05:16,627 * * 145 00:05:16,633 --> 00:05:18,533 - Hardwick. - Jim, hey. How's it going man? 146 00:05:18,533 --> 00:05:19,903 You look great. What's going on? 147 00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:21,730 - Got a meeting with Will Ferrell. 148 00:05:21,733 --> 00:05:23,333 - Ooh. 149 00:05:23,333 --> 00:05:25,333 - What? - Nothing. 150 00:05:25,333 --> 00:05:27,433 I'm--I've heard some-- but I'm sure it's fine. 151 00:05:27,433 --> 00:05:28,933 I'm sure he's fine. 152 00:05:28,933 --> 00:05:30,703 You--you're not going to his office, are you? 153 00:05:30,700 --> 00:05:32,770 You'll be fine. I'm sure it'll be fine. 154 00:05:32,767 --> 00:05:33,967 I got to go. 155 00:05:33,967 --> 00:05:35,097 We're developing "Walking Dead on Ice." 156 00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:36,330 It's going to be great. 157 00:05:36,333 --> 00:05:37,773 - Ice.? - I'll see you later. 158 00:05:37,767 --> 00:05:39,667 * * 159 00:05:44,933 --> 00:05:47,773 [flatulent creaking] 160 00:05:47,767 --> 00:05:49,427 - That was the couch. 161 00:05:49,433 --> 00:05:53,333 [chuckles] That wasn't me. 162 00:05:53,333 --> 00:05:55,803 See? Watch this. 163 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:59,130 It didn't do it that time, but... 164 00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:03,630 You lived in LA long? 165 00:06:03,633 --> 00:06:05,703 [mouths words] 166 00:06:05,700 --> 00:06:08,670 You're from Fort Worth? 167 00:06:10,867 --> 00:06:14,067 Mexican food's great here, huh? 168 00:06:14,067 --> 00:06:16,067 I don't bring that up because of the couch. 169 00:06:16,067 --> 00:06:19,667 I--I love Mexican food. 170 00:06:19,667 --> 00:06:21,767 Not just 'cause I'm Mexican. 171 00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:26,070 - Mr. Ferrell will see you now. 172 00:06:26,067 --> 00:06:27,497 - Thank God. 173 00:06:27,500 --> 00:06:29,300 Oh. [couch creaks] 174 00:06:29,300 --> 00:06:31,070 Couch. 175 00:06:31,067 --> 00:06:36,497 * * 176 00:06:36,500 --> 00:06:39,070 I'm not nervous. 177 00:06:39,067 --> 00:06:42,067 [ominous music] 178 00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:43,067 * * 179 00:06:43,067 --> 00:06:44,797 [door slams, echoes] 180 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:49,630 - Who dare comes before the great Will Ferrell? 181 00:06:49,633 --> 00:06:53,303 Be funny or die. 182 00:06:53,300 --> 00:06:55,700 - This is Jim of House Gaffigan. 183 00:06:55,700 --> 00:06:57,900 - Never heard of it. 184 00:06:57,900 --> 00:07:00,970 - You stand before the great Will Ferrell, 185 00:07:00,967 --> 00:07:04,067 King of the Elves, Ruler of Nights of Talledega, 186 00:07:04,067 --> 00:07:08,267 Man of Anchors, Wielder of Blades of Glory. 187 00:07:08,267 --> 00:07:10,297 Be funny or die. 188 00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:15,070 - So what pitch do you bring to me, House of Fattigan? 189 00:07:15,067 --> 00:07:17,497 - It's Gaffigan. 190 00:07:17,500 --> 00:07:19,130 - Spit it out, fool. 191 00:07:19,133 --> 00:07:23,503 - Oh, it's about this weatherman and he... 192 00:07:24,733 --> 00:07:26,173 Is this your office? 193 00:07:26,167 --> 00:07:29,067 It's--it's nice, but the weatherman, 194 00:07:29,067 --> 00:07:30,427 he, um... 195 00:07:30,433 --> 00:07:32,833 - I can't concentrate on a word you're saying 196 00:07:32,833 --> 00:07:35,803 because of that giant splotch on your face. 197 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:37,430 It's repulsive. 198 00:07:37,433 --> 00:07:41,503 - So, uh, uh, the weatherman moves to New York and he, uh... 199 00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:43,270 - Not funny. 200 00:07:43,267 --> 00:07:44,327 You die. 201 00:07:44,333 --> 00:07:45,533 Off with his oversized head. 202 00:07:45,533 --> 00:07:46,903 - No, no-- 203 00:07:46,900 --> 00:07:51,770 - Save his white, bulbous body for the hounds. 204 00:07:51,767 --> 00:07:52,897 That's good meat. 205 00:07:52,900 --> 00:07:55,700 - Uh, can we talk about this? 206 00:07:55,700 --> 00:07:58,330 Uh, I guess I'm a little nervous. 207 00:07:58,333 --> 00:07:59,603 - Interesting. 208 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:00,770 Sounds very appealing to me. 209 00:08:00,767 --> 00:08:01,867 And, uh... 210 00:08:01,867 --> 00:08:05,497 Hey, come in. Yeah, yeah. 211 00:08:05,500 --> 00:08:07,070 Hold on one second. Hey, Jim? 212 00:08:07,067 --> 00:08:08,327 Welcome. Just have a seat. 213 00:08:08,333 --> 00:08:09,333 It'll take a second. 214 00:08:09,333 --> 00:08:11,203 No, go ahead. 215 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:12,300 Donate all the money. 216 00:08:12,300 --> 00:08:13,800 Yes. I had a good year. 217 00:08:13,800 --> 00:08:16,730 Yeah, bye. Hey. Hey. 218 00:08:16,733 --> 00:08:18,403 - Thanks for, uh, meeting with me. 219 00:08:18,400 --> 00:08:20,430 - Oh, my gosh. Are you kidding me? Look. 220 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:22,303 I'm just gonna cut to the chase. 221 00:08:22,300 --> 00:08:25,130 Um, I think you are so funny 222 00:08:25,133 --> 00:08:28,703 and I want to do a show with you, 223 00:08:28,700 --> 00:08:30,070 but what? 224 00:08:30,067 --> 00:08:33,067 - Oh, wow, well, I do have an idea for a show. 225 00:08:33,067 --> 00:08:36,067 It's about a weatherman from Indiana. 226 00:08:36,067 --> 00:08:37,067 - Right. 227 00:08:37,067 --> 00:08:38,067 - The guy--he's kind of a star 228 00:08:38,067 --> 00:08:40,367 on the local morning show in Gary. 229 00:08:40,367 --> 00:08:42,497 - Gary! Gary the weatherman. 230 00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:44,800 - No, he's from Gary. 231 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:45,900 - Oh, oh, he's from Gary. 232 00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:47,530 - Yeah. - And his name is Gary. 233 00:08:47,533 --> 00:08:51,433 - His name is Jim but he's from Gary. 234 00:08:51,433 --> 00:08:52,573 I would play him. 235 00:08:52,567 --> 00:08:53,567 - Of course. Sorry. 236 00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:55,067 Yes, love it. Yeah. 237 00:08:55,067 --> 00:08:57,327 - Anyways, so he's kind of a star on this local show 238 00:08:57,333 --> 00:09:01,573 in Gary, Indiana where they make the bathroom smell. 239 00:09:01,567 --> 00:09:03,727 - Oh, I didn't know that. 240 00:09:03,733 --> 00:09:04,973 - Well, that--that's a joke. 241 00:09:04,967 --> 00:09:08,167 Gary, Indiana, it smells weird there. 242 00:09:08,167 --> 00:09:09,867 - Oh, okay. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 243 00:09:09,867 --> 00:09:11,197 Got it. Yeah. 244 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,570 - So anyway, our weatherman gets hired 245 00:09:13,567 --> 00:09:15,267 by this morning show in New York, right. 246 00:09:15,267 --> 00:09:16,627 - Okay. 247 00:09:16,633 --> 00:09:19,233 - And everyone in New York treats this guy from Indiana 248 00:09:19,233 --> 00:09:21,103 like he's an uneducated farmhand. 249 00:09:21,100 --> 00:09:24,100 They're like, "Hey, welcome to New York. 250 00:09:24,100 --> 00:09:27,330 "This lamp thing's called electricity. 251 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:28,603 "You can use a chair. 252 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:30,700 You don't got to sit on the ground no more." 253 00:09:30,700 --> 00:09:33,070 - I'm crazy about this idea. - Oh. 254 00:09:33,067 --> 00:09:35,667 - Yeah, and I want to tell you something, Jim. 255 00:09:35,667 --> 00:09:40,367 My dad was a weatherman. 256 00:09:40,367 --> 00:09:41,897 - Well, that's--really? 257 00:09:41,900 --> 00:09:43,870 - I mean, not professionally. 258 00:09:43,867 --> 00:09:46,497 But he--he was really good at, you know, 259 00:09:46,500 --> 00:09:47,870 sensing when it was gonna rain. 260 00:09:47,867 --> 00:09:49,327 - That's a skill. 261 00:09:49,333 --> 00:09:51,303 - Let's make this show. - Yeah, let's do it. 262 00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:53,430 - I don't see any reason why this shouldn't be on television. 263 00:09:53,433 --> 00:09:54,933 - Right? That's great. 264 00:09:58,167 --> 00:09:59,367 - Will Ferrell liked your weatherman idea? 265 00:09:59,367 --> 00:10:00,367 - He loved it. 266 00:10:00,367 --> 00:10:01,397 - Really? 267 00:10:01,400 --> 00:10:03,430 - Yeah. He was crazy about it. 268 00:10:03,433 --> 00:10:05,373 - Outdoor space-crazy? 269 00:10:05,367 --> 00:10:07,297 - Outdoor space-crazy. 270 00:10:07,300 --> 00:10:10,200 - Oh, my gosh. Jim, my dream apartment. 271 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:11,800 - Will asked me to come in tomorrow 272 00:10:11,800 --> 00:10:13,700 with five episode ideas. 273 00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:15,400 - I've got ten. 274 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,100 Jim, we're so close to being able to have our own TV show. 275 00:10:18,100 --> 00:10:20,700 - I know. - Oh, you know what? 276 00:10:20,700 --> 00:10:22,100 Joseph is eating crayons again. 277 00:10:22,100 --> 00:10:23,630 I got to go. I love you. 278 00:10:23,633 --> 00:10:24,633 - Yeah. I love you too. 279 00:10:24,633 --> 00:10:27,603 - Honey, what are you doing? 280 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:28,600 - [sighs] 281 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:31,030 [harp glissando] 282 00:10:31,033 --> 00:10:33,703 Can't believe our show won all these Emmys. 283 00:10:33,700 --> 00:10:38,700 - This is the greatest moment of my professional career. 284 00:10:38,700 --> 00:10:41,700 [sultry saxophone music] 285 00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:49,700 * * 286 00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:51,630 [record scratch] 287 00:10:51,633 --> 00:10:53,403 - Uh, I got to eat something. 288 00:10:53,400 --> 00:10:54,430 [laughter] 289 00:10:54,433 --> 00:10:57,303 So then the people in Chicago 290 00:10:57,300 --> 00:10:59,670 don't know that northwest Indiana 291 00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:00,867 is, like, ten minutes away. 292 00:11:00,867 --> 00:11:02,527 - No. Oh! 293 00:11:02,533 --> 00:11:03,533 - It's true. 294 00:11:03,533 --> 00:11:04,833 - That's so good. 295 00:11:04,833 --> 00:11:07,203 Jim, all these episodes are dynamite. 296 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,470 - Oh, thanks. 297 00:11:08,467 --> 00:11:09,597 - You know who asked me about the show? 298 00:11:09,600 --> 00:11:11,570 - Who? - Ron Howard. 299 00:11:11,567 --> 00:11:12,827 - Wow. 300 00:11:12,833 --> 00:11:15,333 - I said, "Back off. It's mine." 301 00:11:15,333 --> 00:11:16,433 - That's amazing. 302 00:11:16,433 --> 00:11:18,733 - All these episodes. Oh, spot on. 303 00:11:18,733 --> 00:11:20,273 - Oh, thanks. 304 00:11:20,267 --> 00:11:21,527 - Yeah, and we're definitely gonna make this show. 305 00:11:21,533 --> 00:11:23,103 - Yeah? Great. 306 00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:26,370 - But in the interim, I've got this other project 307 00:11:26,367 --> 00:11:28,127 that I'm so excited about that I would-- 308 00:11:28,133 --> 00:11:29,473 I would love to get your help. 309 00:11:29,467 --> 00:11:31,467 - Yeah, yeah, please. Whatever you need. 310 00:11:31,467 --> 00:11:32,667 - You're not just saying that? - No. 311 00:11:32,667 --> 00:11:33,897 Happy to help. 312 00:11:33,900 --> 00:11:35,230 - Fantastic. Great. 313 00:11:35,233 --> 00:11:37,303 I think you're going to love this. 314 00:11:37,300 --> 00:11:40,600 This, my friend, is the future of comedy. 315 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:45,530 - [humming and chirping] 316 00:11:45,533 --> 00:11:47,533 - How outrageous is that? 317 00:11:47,533 --> 00:11:51,533 - Yeah, that's...yeah. 318 00:11:51,533 --> 00:11:52,803 He... 319 00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:54,600 - He's using the microphone. 320 00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,070 - Yeah. 321 00:11:56,067 --> 00:12:00,097 So you're producing the Dave Marks show on TV Land? 322 00:12:00,100 --> 00:12:01,770 - I sure am. Yeah. 323 00:12:01,767 --> 00:12:03,227 Jumped at the chance to do it. 324 00:12:03,233 --> 00:12:04,633 This thing's gonna be epic. 325 00:12:04,633 --> 00:12:06,273 It's just--it's just missing something 326 00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:08,297 and I can't quite put a finger on it. 327 00:12:08,300 --> 00:12:10,070 - Hmm. Humor? 328 00:12:10,067 --> 00:12:12,097 - No, no. A foil, Jim. 329 00:12:12,100 --> 00:12:14,900 - Okay. - A yang to Dave's yin. 330 00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:16,570 - You mean like a bromance? 331 00:12:16,567 --> 00:12:17,567 - Hmm? 332 00:12:17,567 --> 00:12:19,367 Did you just make that up? 333 00:12:19,367 --> 00:12:20,467 - No. 334 00:12:20,467 --> 00:12:22,227 - That's brilliant. - Oh. 335 00:12:22,233 --> 00:12:25,303 - Yeah. That's why we need your voice on the show. 336 00:12:25,300 --> 00:12:29,970 - Yeah, yeah, well, what about my show? 337 00:12:29,967 --> 00:12:32,767 - Jim, give me your hand. 338 00:12:32,767 --> 00:12:34,467 - Um... 339 00:12:34,467 --> 00:12:37,597 - We are making your weatherman show, okay? 340 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:38,730 - Mm-hmm. 341 00:12:38,733 --> 00:12:41,073 - We're making it, okay? 342 00:12:41,067 --> 00:12:42,267 - Okay. - Okay? 343 00:12:42,267 --> 00:12:43,597 - Um... 344 00:12:43,600 --> 00:12:47,630 - My bond is sacred, okay? 345 00:12:47,633 --> 00:12:51,533 - Okay. 346 00:12:51,533 --> 00:12:52,903 - Right? - Yeah. 347 00:12:52,900 --> 00:12:56,600 - But for right now, I need your help on this show. 348 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,300 - Look, I want to help you. 349 00:12:58,300 --> 00:12:59,370 I-I really do. 350 00:12:59,367 --> 00:13:02,927 I just--I don't know if--if... 351 00:13:02,933 --> 00:13:04,273 - If what? 352 00:13:04,267 --> 00:13:06,797 Is this not something you want to do? 353 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:10,070 - No, I--I think you misinterpret-- 354 00:13:10,067 --> 00:13:11,267 I'm totally into doing it. 355 00:13:11,267 --> 00:13:12,267 - You're into it? - Yeah. 356 00:13:12,267 --> 00:13:13,767 - Oh. Great. 357 00:13:13,767 --> 00:13:15,097 I thought there was a problem there for a second. 358 00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:16,530 - Yeah, I was acting. - Oh! 359 00:13:16,533 --> 00:13:18,673 - That I--I gotcha. 360 00:13:18,667 --> 00:13:19,727 - Hook, like, and sinker. 361 00:13:19,733 --> 00:13:20,733 - Why wouldn't I want to do it? 362 00:13:20,733 --> 00:13:23,273 I know Dave and I--you know, 363 00:13:23,267 --> 00:13:25,627 I think I could make a terrific contribution. 364 00:13:25,633 --> 00:13:27,403 - This is gonna be great for both of us. 365 00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:31,500 Really is. Bromance. 366 00:13:31,500 --> 00:13:34,170 Gosh. So good. 367 00:13:34,167 --> 00:13:35,267 Can I use that? 368 00:13:35,267 --> 00:13:36,967 - Yeah, I think it's-- 369 00:13:36,967 --> 00:13:38,197 - Really? You're not gonna be weird? 370 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:42,100 - You've never heard that term? - No. 371 00:13:45,733 --> 00:13:47,073 - So, wait, you're gonna work for Dave Marks 372 00:13:47,067 --> 00:13:48,797 after he betrayed you? 373 00:13:48,800 --> 00:13:51,070 - Not for, with. 374 00:13:51,067 --> 00:13:54,067 - So the show is about you and Dave? 375 00:13:54,067 --> 00:13:56,067 - No, it's Dave's show. 376 00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:57,767 I would be a character on the show 377 00:13:57,767 --> 00:13:59,597 and Will Ferrell really wants me involved in the writing. 378 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:00,970 [baby coos] 379 00:14:00,967 --> 00:14:03,427 - But I thought John Mulaney was writing with Dave. 380 00:14:03,433 --> 00:14:05,333 - He is writing, but Will wants me to write 381 00:14:05,333 --> 00:14:07,833 and appear on the show. 382 00:14:07,833 --> 00:14:10,533 Will thinks I'm funny. 383 00:14:10,533 --> 00:14:12,503 - That's--I don't know, Jim. 384 00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:14,670 - Jeannie, Will Ferrell's producing. 385 00:14:14,667 --> 00:14:15,927 This is how he does it. 386 00:14:15,933 --> 00:14:17,403 He still wants to do the weatherman show, 387 00:14:17,400 --> 00:14:20,070 but he wants to do Dave's show first. 388 00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:21,897 - It sounds pretty crazy to me. 389 00:14:21,900 --> 00:14:25,600 - Yeah, outdoor space-crazy. 390 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:28,270 - Okay. You definitely have to do it. 391 00:14:28,267 --> 00:14:32,297 - Can I have a bite of that? - Yeah. 392 00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:34,130 - Move that all into the scene. 393 00:14:34,133 --> 00:14:36,073 - Yeah, that one. Not the updated one. 394 00:14:36,067 --> 00:14:37,867 Not the one with the preview. 395 00:14:37,867 --> 00:14:39,527 - Hey. - Hey. 396 00:14:39,533 --> 00:14:43,303 - Hey. I'm gonna get a-a water. 397 00:14:47,733 --> 00:14:50,503 - Hey. - Hey. 398 00:14:50,500 --> 00:14:54,300 - Look, I know things have been 399 00:14:54,300 --> 00:14:56,300 kind of awkward between us, 400 00:14:56,300 --> 00:14:59,330 but I--I'm sure we can make things work, 401 00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:01,703 and for my part, I'm really thrilled. 402 00:15:01,700 --> 00:15:04,670 I'm honored to have you be a part of this thing 403 00:15:04,667 --> 00:15:06,667 and I'm really looking forward 404 00:15:06,667 --> 00:15:08,697 to what you have to contribute, so. 405 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:11,130 - Thanks. I--that--that means a lot. 406 00:15:11,133 --> 00:15:12,473 - Of course. Come on, man. 407 00:15:12,467 --> 00:15:13,927 Come on. - Thanks. 408 00:15:13,933 --> 00:15:15,403 - All right. - All's good? 409 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:16,930 - Yeah. All right. - Good. 410 00:15:16,933 --> 00:15:19,073 Hey, Jim. - Hey. 411 00:15:19,067 --> 00:15:20,627 - Welcome aboard. - Thanks. 412 00:15:20,633 --> 00:15:22,603 - Let's get started, huh? - All righty. 413 00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:23,800 - All right, Jim, you have notes? 414 00:15:23,800 --> 00:15:25,130 - I have notes. 415 00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:26,503 - You have notes. - I thought of some ideas. 416 00:15:26,500 --> 00:15:27,900 - You got some ideas? What do you got? 417 00:15:27,900 --> 00:15:29,230 - Well, you know, I was thinking about this. 418 00:15:29,233 --> 00:15:30,903 - All right. - So Dave, 419 00:15:30,900 --> 00:15:33,070 you're a single guy living with your mom in Jersey City, right? 420 00:15:33,067 --> 00:15:35,167 I'm a married guy living in Manhattan 421 00:15:35,167 --> 00:15:36,827 with my wife and five kids. 422 00:15:36,833 --> 00:15:38,303 We're opposites, right? 423 00:15:38,300 --> 00:15:39,930 But I was thinking of different stories. 424 00:15:39,933 --> 00:15:41,833 Like, one would be-- remember the time 425 00:15:41,833 --> 00:15:44,073 you crashed the kid's birthday party 426 00:15:44,067 --> 00:15:48,397 I had to go to in Central Park? 427 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:49,670 - I don't know about a kid's show. 428 00:15:49,667 --> 00:15:53,067 - Um, yeah, no. 429 00:15:53,067 --> 00:15:54,567 - No? Okay. - No. 430 00:15:54,567 --> 00:15:56,197 But I think there's something there. 431 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:57,400 - Yeah, yeah. 432 00:15:57,400 --> 00:16:00,070 - Like, but maybe instead of any of that 433 00:16:00,067 --> 00:16:01,527 and the kid's birthday party, 434 00:16:01,533 --> 00:16:03,073 remember when we were at Sarah Silverman's birthday? 435 00:16:03,067 --> 00:16:04,227 - Oh, yeah, yeah. 436 00:16:04,233 --> 00:16:05,503 - And the waiter came out with the nachos. 437 00:16:05,500 --> 00:16:06,970 - He did that thing with the thing. 438 00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:09,127 - He did that thing and we were both immediately like-- 439 00:16:09,133 --> 00:16:10,633 both: "These ain't nachos." 440 00:16:10,633 --> 00:16:12,873 [laughter] 441 00:16:12,867 --> 00:16:14,127 - Oh, my God. 442 00:16:14,133 --> 00:16:16,073 That was like, I laughed from my bowels just now. 443 00:16:16,067 --> 00:16:17,497 - I love that laugh. - That's a good sign. 444 00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:18,500 - I love to laugh. - Put that in. Put-- 445 00:16:18,500 --> 00:16:19,870 - What--what happened? 446 00:16:19,867 --> 00:16:22,897 - You can say that there, and then my question is, 447 00:16:22,900 --> 00:16:23,930 do you want that? 448 00:16:23,933 --> 00:16:25,133 - Oh, my God, yes. 449 00:16:25,133 --> 00:16:26,573 - You still like it? - I like it. 450 00:16:26,567 --> 00:16:27,567 I like it more now. - I like that you like it. 451 00:16:27,567 --> 00:16:29,297 - I like it more, yeah. 452 00:16:29,300 --> 00:16:30,530 - I can't--if I can't see what you're writing down, 453 00:16:30,533 --> 00:16:31,733 I can't really contribute. 454 00:16:31,733 --> 00:16:33,333 - Can you just stop whining, please? 455 00:16:33,333 --> 00:16:34,503 Okay, this is my shot, all right? 456 00:16:34,500 --> 00:16:36,070 It's not "The Jim Gaffigan Show," 457 00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:37,697 you know, which I'm sure-- I'm sure would be fine. 458 00:16:37,700 --> 00:16:39,070 Anyway, your character's the easy part. 459 00:16:39,067 --> 00:16:40,627 It's the schlubby middle-aged bald guy 460 00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:42,103 married to the smoking hot wife. 461 00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:45,230 Meanwhile, we've got feelers out to Kelly Ripa. 462 00:16:45,233 --> 00:16:46,633 - Kelly Ripa? 463 00:16:46,633 --> 00:16:48,233 I mean, do you really think you're going 464 00:16:48,233 --> 00:16:49,273 to be able to get her? 465 00:16:49,267 --> 00:16:50,567 She has a talk show. 466 00:16:50,567 --> 00:16:52,327 Why would she do a sitcom on TV Land? 467 00:16:52,333 --> 00:16:53,703 - She would do it for Dave. 468 00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:55,570 And we need an actress of that caliber 469 00:16:55,567 --> 00:16:59,667 because this woman is so strong yet so vulnerable. 470 00:16:59,667 --> 00:17:01,267 - Right, you know. - Right. 471 00:17:01,267 --> 00:17:04,367 - Trapped in a loveless marriage to an outspoken anti-Semite. 472 00:17:04,367 --> 00:17:07,397 - What? W--what was that last part? 473 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,930 - Well, I'm sure Will told you that your character's like, 474 00:17:09,933 --> 00:17:11,333 the cranky curmudgeon, you know, 475 00:17:11,333 --> 00:17:12,803 who's always yelling things like, 476 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:16,700 "Get off my lawn," and "Argh, those pesky Jews." 477 00:17:16,700 --> 00:17:18,930 - I'm not saying anything anti-Semitic. 478 00:17:18,933 --> 00:17:20,903 - Well, that's good. You don't have to. 479 00:17:20,900 --> 00:17:22,930 The actor playing you will be saying the things 480 00:17:22,933 --> 00:17:24,473 that are anti-Semitic. 481 00:17:24,467 --> 00:17:26,667 - I'm not playing myself? 482 00:17:26,667 --> 00:17:27,867 - No, it's not a reality show. 483 00:17:27,867 --> 00:17:29,297 - Please. 484 00:17:29,300 --> 00:17:30,730 - So, like, Jim Gaffigan doesn't play Jim Gaffigan, 485 00:17:30,733 --> 00:17:32,203 and there'll be sets instead of real places. 486 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:33,500 - I know that. 487 00:17:33,500 --> 00:17:34,670 - It's not like I need to be surrounded. 488 00:17:34,667 --> 00:17:36,067 - Right, we get a real actor to do it, 489 00:17:36,067 --> 00:17:37,667 and that way Dave has real actors to work with. 490 00:17:37,667 --> 00:17:39,097 - I need real actors. - But I'm an actor. 491 00:17:39,100 --> 00:17:40,600 - Yeah, I mean, as much as John and I appreciate 492 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:42,330 you working the Hertz commercial 493 00:17:42,333 --> 00:17:44,173 we're going to need a little bit more than "My car," you know? 494 00:17:44,167 --> 00:17:47,527 I mean, meanwhile we got an offer out to Louie, so. 495 00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,733 - Louie CK has his own show. 496 00:17:49,733 --> 00:17:50,873 - No, Louie Anderson. - Louie Anderson. 497 00:17:50,867 --> 00:17:52,767 - And when he passes, John Goodman. 498 00:17:52,767 --> 00:17:54,667 - John... John Goodman. 499 00:17:54,667 --> 00:17:56,727 - Aren't those guys in their 60s? 500 00:17:56,733 --> 00:17:58,973 - You seem 60. - Me? 501 00:17:58,967 --> 00:18:00,067 No, I'm not-- 502 00:18:00,067 --> 00:18:01,127 - You're 59. 503 00:18:01,133 --> 00:18:02,933 - I'm not even close to 59. 504 00:18:02,933 --> 00:18:05,303 - You're a New York 50 but you're a Hollywood 60, 505 00:18:05,300 --> 00:18:07,130 and all that means is that you look 60. 506 00:18:07,133 --> 00:18:08,603 - Yeah. 507 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:11,430 - All right, look, I have other ideas here, so... 508 00:18:11,433 --> 00:18:12,703 - You have ketchup on your face. 509 00:18:12,700 --> 00:18:16,230 - That's not--that's my splotch. 510 00:18:16,233 --> 00:18:18,103 - I'm sorry you're upset, honey. 511 00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:19,630 I want to support you. 512 00:18:19,633 --> 00:18:21,773 - If I work on Dave's show I'll be miserable 513 00:18:21,767 --> 00:18:25,127 but if I don't, Will Ferrell will think I'm difficult. 514 00:18:25,133 --> 00:18:27,333 - I think you'd rather be difficult than miserable. 515 00:18:27,333 --> 00:18:28,733 - But if I'm difficult 516 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:29,973 then I don't get to do my weatherman show. 517 00:18:29,967 --> 00:18:32,197 - Absolutely. So I say go with miserable. 518 00:18:32,200 --> 00:18:34,370 - I can't believe you want me to be miserable. 519 00:18:34,367 --> 00:18:37,167 - Okay, fine, then by all means, be difficult. 520 00:18:37,167 --> 00:18:39,067 - I'm not difficult. 521 00:18:39,067 --> 00:18:40,327 - Oh, you're definitely difficult. 522 00:18:40,333 --> 00:18:41,903 You know, at least visually. 523 00:18:41,900 --> 00:18:45,770 - Listen, I want this apartment really badly, it's true. 524 00:18:45,767 --> 00:18:47,367 But I don't want you to be miserable. 525 00:18:47,367 --> 00:18:49,127 So if you don't want to do the show, don't do it. 526 00:18:49,133 --> 00:18:52,173 - Yeah, that way you can be difficult and selfish. 527 00:18:52,167 --> 00:18:53,427 - You're not helping, Daniel. 528 00:18:53,433 --> 00:18:55,303 - No, he's right. 529 00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:57,200 I got to just suffer through this 530 00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,130 and focus on my weatherman show 531 00:18:59,133 --> 00:19:02,603 so that we can get the nice apartment. 532 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:04,800 - Really? We can? 533 00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,230 - Yes. 534 00:19:06,233 --> 00:19:08,533 In fact, tomorrow, I'm just gonna be super positive 535 00:19:08,533 --> 00:19:10,073 in the Skype with Will. 536 00:19:10,067 --> 00:19:12,597 - Skype? Can your head even fit on a computer screen? 537 00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:14,400 - I can put makeup on your splotch. 538 00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:16,070 - I don't need makeup. 539 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:20,470 - And then we were like... 540 00:19:20,467 --> 00:19:22,527 both: "These ain't nachos." 541 00:19:22,533 --> 00:19:25,373 [laughter] 542 00:19:25,367 --> 00:19:26,827 - 'Cause they weren't. 543 00:19:26,833 --> 00:19:30,303 They were, uh, I think they were pita chips. 544 00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:33,430 Oh, my gosh. Such a fun party, so much fun. 545 00:19:33,433 --> 00:19:36,573 Jim, do you, uh, do you know Sarah Silverman at all? 546 00:19:36,567 --> 00:19:37,927 - Yeah, I know Sarah. 547 00:19:37,933 --> 00:19:40,473 I just didn't know about the party. 548 00:19:40,467 --> 00:19:41,967 - Oh, that's funny, 549 00:19:41,967 --> 00:19:43,767 'cause she said she didn't know you. 550 00:19:43,767 --> 00:19:46,667 Anyway, I like all these ideas a lot. 551 00:19:46,667 --> 00:19:48,127 - Oh, great. Okay, terrific. 552 00:19:48,133 --> 00:19:49,733 Well, thanks. Thanks so much. 553 00:19:49,733 --> 00:19:51,373 - Hey, I love seeing the three of you 554 00:19:51,367 --> 00:19:52,567 work as a team. 555 00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:54,227 It's great for me. 556 00:19:54,233 --> 00:19:56,803 The only thing is, something isn't quite popping 557 00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:59,070 and I just want to make one small tweak. 558 00:19:59,067 --> 00:20:01,027 And here's my thought. Hear me out. 559 00:20:01,033 --> 00:20:04,633 Dave, instead of being a comedian, 560 00:20:04,633 --> 00:20:08,003 what if you were a weatherman? 561 00:20:08,000 --> 00:20:09,230 - Seriously? 562 00:20:09,233 --> 00:20:12,203 - I love it. I love it. 563 00:20:12,200 --> 00:20:13,330 - From Jersey City. 564 00:20:13,333 --> 00:20:15,733 - Uh-uh, no, Idaho. 565 00:20:15,733 --> 00:20:17,703 - Idaho. - Do--do you mean Indiana? 566 00:20:17,700 --> 00:20:18,700 - Oh, even better. 567 00:20:18,700 --> 00:20:20,330 Great idea, Jim. 568 00:20:20,333 --> 00:20:22,703 And his name shall be Gary. 569 00:20:22,700 --> 00:20:24,270 - Oh, yeah. 570 00:20:24,267 --> 00:20:26,827 This fall, TV Land-- 571 00:20:26,833 --> 00:20:30,603 both: Gary the weatherman! 572 00:20:30,600 --> 00:20:33,670 - Jim, is that ketchup on your face? 573 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:34,667 - It's my splotch. 574 00:20:34,667 --> 00:20:37,667 [man beatboxing] 575 00:20:41,167 --> 00:20:44,167 [man beatboxing] 576 00:20:44,167 --> 00:20:52,097 * * 577 00:21:04,633 --> 00:21:09,373 * * 578 00:21:09,423 --> 00:21:13,973 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 40506

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