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♪ It seems today that all you see ♪
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♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪
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♪ But where are those
good old-fashioned values ♪
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♪ On which we used to rely? ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪
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♪ Lucky there's a man
who positively can do ♪
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♪ All the things that make us ♪
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♪ Laugh and cry ♪
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♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪
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- Synced and corrected by AlexandreMT -
- www.addic7ed.com -
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Ah! This is so exciting!
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I can't believe Daddy actually bought
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a Minor League Baseball team.
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I love coming to the ballpark.
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Drunken Irish in front
of a fishbowl of minorities.
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What could go wrong?
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Dad, what are you doing?
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This is tailgating, son.
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It's where you bring all your trash
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and you leave it
for someone else to deal with.
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Here, help me get this
Christmas tree out of the back.
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Meg's estrogen supplements?
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I'll take that. Thank you.
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So, what do you think
of your first tailgate, Stewie?
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It's so great.
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Dad gave me a sip of beer.
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I'm gonna mention that to my teacher,
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and it's gonna be a big problem.
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Oh, there's Bonnie.
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We always have so much fun
at these things.
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Hey, Bonnie, who's on first?
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Who, the person's name or the pronoun?
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Ha! And it goes on like this.
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Hey, Joe, how's it going?
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Sorry, Peter, no time to talk.
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- It's my day to shine.
- What?
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Yeah. Handicapped
person at the ballpark...
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Ramps, private escort, meet the team.
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Is there a Joe Swanson?
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Right here!
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Meet me at that sad balcony!
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Well, here it is.
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What do you think?
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Wow, Daddy, it's beautiful!
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Yeah, it's really great up here.
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There's free food, a bar,
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and you can drop
a plastic spider on a string
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- on your friends below.
- Really?
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Go, Quahog!
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I fell trying to lower a spider.
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Good afternoon, fans,
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and welcome to Minor League Baseball.
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I'm your announcer,
Johnny "Feedback" Robinson,
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here to tell you about all the...
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Whoa! Hold on, hold on.
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Step back from the mic.
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Like this?
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Okay?
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Now for tonight's starting lineup!
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First, your coach,
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Frank "Cardiac Arrest" Ross.
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And the pitching coach,
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Bill "Doesn't Know CPR" McGillicuddy.
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Damn it! Where am I gonna get
another coach?
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I'm on vacation!
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Aw, darn. That would've been funny.
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Hey, Griffin, you want to be
a Minor League Baseball coach?
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Seriously?
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Heck yeah, I do!
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Oh, man, I haven't been this excited
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since I met Cool Hand Luke.
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Wow. You got a cool hand, Luke.
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Yeah, well, he doesn't follow the crowd.
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He plays by his own rules,
and women respond to that.
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Check this out.
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"Hey, baby. You're looking fine."
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"Mmm. Oh, yeah.
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Mmm. Mmm."
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Oh, that's hot.
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You mind if I get in on that?
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"Oh, yeah.
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"Mmm.
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"Just FYI,
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I'm either gonna finish
too quick or not at all."
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All right, Griffin,
that cutaway convinced me
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that you are, in fact, sure of this.
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Now get down in that dugout
and do your job, Coach.
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Aw, thanks, Carter!
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I won't let you down,
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or my name's not
Peter "Little Bingo" Griffin.
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All right, little bingo. Let's go.
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Little bingo here. Not a lot of bingo.
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Don't want to play bingo
for a long time.
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Short game of bingo.
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Don't even have to play a little bingo.
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Could play a little banjo.
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Whoa, this guy knows what he's doing.
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I don't know. I'm not convinced yet.
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Ducks on the pond, guys,
ducks on the pond.
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Chewing up bits of bread,
pooping in the pond.
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Ducks on the pond. Some of 'em brown,
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some of 'em prettier...
All of 'em ducks.
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Ducks on the pond.
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I would follow him into hell.
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Morning, team.
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00:04:03,326 --> 00:04:05,786
Peter, do you really have
to wear those in the house?
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Yes, I do. I'm a baseball coach now.
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You knew that when you married me.
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Peter, you want some eggs?
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I actually brought my
own breakfast today, thank you.
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Ow. Gross!
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What the hell, Dad?
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Meg, can I, um...
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can I see you in my office, please?
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Hey, thanks for coming. Take a seat.
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- What's up?
- This is...
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This is really the toughest part
of the business, isn't it?
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Oh, my God, are you trading me?
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Look, it's nothing personal.
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You've been very professional
as a family member,
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but... here's the thing...
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We're sending you down to American Dad.
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No! What? No!
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Look, they're not excited
about it either.
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I guess I could call The Orville.
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I'll do American Dad.
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Okay, boys, this is it.
Bottom of the ninth.
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We just need a bleep,
a bloop, a walk, a balk,
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another balk,
and, of course, a little bingo.
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Let's go!
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That's it, boys! Walk-off home run!
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Get out there and tear his clothes off!
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He just won for us!
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Get him!
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Yeah! Punch him!
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Good! Curb him!
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Okay, now pull his shirt over his head
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and waterboard him with the Gatorade.
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Yes! Cut him with knives!
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Good! Burn him with fire! Yes!
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Way to go, you!
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All this is happening
because you did something well.
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I'm sorry, Lois.
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I, I'm gassed.
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What's wrong?
You want me to get the wedge?
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- What's going on, Coach?
- I'm losing it.
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Maybe we should call in the kid.
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Hey, no problem.
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You went eight full minutes.
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Bring in the kid!
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All right. Bring us home, kid,
bring us home.
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Little bingo. Ducks on the pond,
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00:06:06,116 --> 00:06:07,741
furry ducks, little man in a boat.
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If you can find it,
you're a better man than I am.
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I can't believe
the Quahog Whooping Scalpers
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are actually going
to the playoffs this year.
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To Coach Griffin!
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Hey, thanks, guys.
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All right, it's time for me to
Oakley-load for tonight's game.
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Okay. Forehead Oakleys,
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round-the-neck Oakleys,
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brim-of-the-cap Oakleys,
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back-of-the-head Oakleys,
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tucked-into-my-shirt-collar Oakleys,
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Everglades fan boat Oakleys,
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and Ray-Bans for my eyes,
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because Oakleys are terrible.
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All right, it's Bucket-O-Shrimp Night,
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brought to you by Rocco's
Lukewarm Refrigerator Trucks.
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Rocco's... We got it there, didn't we?
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Hmm.
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That child's beach toy full of
gray baseball stadium shellfish
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isn't sitting right for some reason.
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Maybe I should smoke a cigarette
for the first time ever.
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Okay, not a fix for now
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00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:08,552
but definitely something I
immediately want to keep doing.
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Probably best to just add something hot
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and acidic to the mix.
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Burnt coffee!
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00:07:13,099 --> 00:07:15,768
Get your burnt, re-microwaved coffee!
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I'll take one!
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Oh, boy.
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Mr. Pewterschmidt, I think I
have to go to the bathroom, sir.
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Not now. We're about
to do the national anthem.
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Oh, boy.
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It's like Medusa's hair in there.
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I can't stop it.
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Must... sit in a way...
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that pinches my sphincter...
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shut.
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Oh, my!
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00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,940
Looks like Coach Peter Griffin
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00:08:02,941 --> 00:08:05,859
is taking a knee
during your national anthem.
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I'm Canadian.
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What is he thinking "aboot"?
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00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:10,614
What's he doing?
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00:08:10,615 --> 00:08:12,825
He's not protesting the anthem, is he?
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00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:16,370
Uh-oh.
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Shrimp buckets!
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All-you-can-eat shrimp!
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Right here, dude.
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Good evening, I'm Tom Tucker,
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joined tonight by a very special guest,
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00:08:30,468 --> 00:08:33,303
Channel Five's own Tom Tucker Senior,
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00:08:33,304 --> 00:08:35,806
who hasn't been on the air since 1964.
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00:08:35,807 --> 00:08:37,224
Take it away, Dad.
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00:08:37,225 --> 00:08:38,392
Thanks, Tom.
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00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:39,643
More and more women are choosing
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00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,228
to work outside the home.
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00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:42,813
I call them prostitutes...
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00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:44,481
And that's a wrap for Tom Senior.
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00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:45,858
Our top story tonight,
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00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:48,068
local baseball coach Peter Griffin
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00:08:48,069 --> 00:08:50,154
took a knee during
the national anthem today,
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00:08:50,155 --> 00:08:52,281
joining the fight for equalit.
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00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:53,866
Well, just finished a load.
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00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:55,325
Gonna do the laundry next.
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00:08:55,326 --> 00:08:56,785
Dad, check it out!
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00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:59,705
You're on the news for taking
a knee during the anthem.
220
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,206
- What?
- They called you a hero
221
00:09:01,207 --> 00:09:02,666
and an activist.
222
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:03,834
- A hero?
- Yeah.
223
00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:05,169
Because you took a knee
to support the fight
224
00:09:05,170 --> 00:09:07,045
against police brutality.
225
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:10,048
Yeah, yes. That's what I did.
226
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:12,468
I can't believe my dad's a hero.
227
00:09:12,469 --> 00:09:13,927
Oh, I'm no hero.
228
00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:17,097
I'm just a white guy doing what
black people were already doing.
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00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:18,849
In other words, a hero.
230
00:09:18,850 --> 00:09:21,685
Well, can I just say,
as the famed family liberal,
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00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:23,937
I think this activism is great, Peter.
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00:09:23,938 --> 00:09:26,064
Doesn't matter if it's me or, say, you
233
00:09:26,065 --> 00:09:28,233
who gets applauded
for his progressive thinking,
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00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,860
as long as the message is out there.
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00:09:29,861 --> 00:09:31,153
Thank you, Brian.
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00:09:31,154 --> 00:09:34,281
Wow. You-you are furious.
237
00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:36,575
Not at all. As long
as the message gets out there.
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00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,619
I'm no different than my peers...
Rosa Parks,
239
00:09:38,620 --> 00:09:41,205
Nelson Mandela, Dr. Martin Luther King.
240
00:09:41,206 --> 00:09:43,081
Hey, did you ever notice
he has the names "Doc"
241
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:44,374
and "Marty" in his name?
242
00:09:44,375 --> 00:09:46,543
- Let it go.
- Hello, Twitter.
243
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:51,424
And I have to move out again.
244
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:55,219
I don't know, Peter.
245
00:09:55,220 --> 00:09:56,887
This all seems weird.
246
00:09:56,888 --> 00:09:59,139
You never been interested
in these issues before.
247
00:09:59,140 --> 00:10:02,476
A-Are you sure you're not just
exploiting a real social issue
248
00:10:02,477 --> 00:10:04,853
so that people can call you a hero?
249
00:10:04,854 --> 00:10:06,980
- You heard Tom Tucker.
- I'm an activist now.
250
00:10:06,981 --> 00:10:08,440
I'm gonna go down in history,
251
00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:10,067
like my great-great-grandfather,
252
00:10:10,068 --> 00:10:12,778
John Wilkes Photo Booth Griffin.
253
00:10:24,123 --> 00:10:26,124
We now return to Seinfeld,
254
00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,962
which keeps getting edited down
more and more for syndication.
255
00:10:29,963 --> 00:10:32,172
No soup for...
256
00:10:32,173 --> 00:10:33,549
Funny show.
257
00:10:33,550 --> 00:10:36,760
Drinks are on me tonight,
thanks to your boy Peter.
258
00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:38,136
Wow. Thanks, Jerome.
259
00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:40,764
Well, thank you
for supporting the cause.
260
00:10:40,765 --> 00:10:43,183
Wow, people just give you things now?
261
00:10:43,184 --> 00:10:45,060
Yeah. Being an activist is great.
262
00:10:45,061 --> 00:10:47,271
I get all kinds of respect now.
Check it out.
263
00:10:47,272 --> 00:10:49,357
Here comes Cher to congratulate me.
264
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:53,652
Peter, that's just a barstool
with a fur coat draped over it.
265
00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:54,945
Oh.
266
00:10:54,946 --> 00:10:57,532
Well, I see Robert De Niro
headed this way.
267
00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:01,827
That's a trash can
with a moldy pumpkin on top.
268
00:11:01,828 --> 00:11:05,540
Ah. Well, I definitely see
Michael Rapaport over there.
269
00:11:07,458 --> 00:11:10,294
That's someone's Boston Market
that fell on the floor.
270
00:11:10,295 --> 00:11:12,045
- Peter, you okay?
- Yeah, so many liberals
271
00:11:12,046 --> 00:11:14,798
patted me on the back today
that I lost my glasses.
272
00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:17,301
We're proud of you, Peter.
273
00:11:19,178 --> 00:11:22,390
In some comics, this means I'm sleeping.
274
00:11:25,727 --> 00:11:27,644
All right. In order to prove
I'm an activist,
275
00:11:27,645 --> 00:11:30,314
I need to yell at people
who are just trying to buy milk
276
00:11:30,315 --> 00:11:32,232
on their way home from work.
277
00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:34,026
Hello. Hi.
278
00:11:34,027 --> 00:11:35,319
Have a nice day.
279
00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:36,653
Hi there. Hello.
280
00:11:36,654 --> 00:11:38,655
Do you have a minute
to save a child's life?
281
00:11:38,656 --> 00:11:40,198
Yeah. I guess.
282
00:11:40,199 --> 00:11:42,242
You got a minute. Ticktock.
283
00:11:42,243 --> 00:11:43,577
What are you doing?
284
00:11:43,578 --> 00:11:44,870
30 seconds now.
285
00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:45,871
I'm listening.
286
00:11:45,872 --> 00:11:47,331
What am I even convincing you of?
287
00:11:47,332 --> 00:11:50,250
Tell me why Smokey the Bear
wears jeans but no shirt.
288
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:51,460
Why would they do that?!
289
00:11:51,461 --> 00:11:55,173
- Is that what this is all about?
- That's what this is all about.
290
00:12:00,511 --> 00:12:02,179
Peter, what the hell?
291
00:12:02,180 --> 00:12:04,056
It's okay, it's okay.
292
00:12:04,057 --> 00:12:05,182
"I voted."
293
00:12:05,183 --> 00:12:07,059
So... yeah.
294
00:12:07,060 --> 00:12:09,061
- What does that matter?!
- Oh, well, I'm a part
295
00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,355
of the national conversation
now, and I voted.
296
00:12:11,356 --> 00:12:13,565
So my hands are kinda tied, so...
297
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:14,775
yeah.
298
00:12:14,776 --> 00:12:16,360
You know what? This whole activism thing
299
00:12:16,361 --> 00:12:18,111
has gone on long enough.
300
00:12:18,112 --> 00:12:20,864
You knelt at one game.
It's not like opportunity's
301
00:12:20,865 --> 00:12:23,909
gonna come knocking on the door,
offering you money for it.
302
00:12:25,745 --> 00:12:28,205
Hi. I'm the president of Nike.
303
00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:29,456
How'd you like some money?
304
00:12:29,457 --> 00:12:31,208
For crying out loud!
305
00:12:31,209 --> 00:12:33,293
Mr. Griffin, we heard about your protest
306
00:12:33,294 --> 00:12:36,046
and we no-heartedly believe
that, with your help,
307
00:12:36,047 --> 00:12:39,466
we can conflate buying our
products with genuine activism.
308
00:12:39,467 --> 00:12:41,259
- I voted.
- Yes.
309
00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:43,428
And now we want to give you
a lot of money
310
00:12:43,429 --> 00:12:45,097
to star in a commercial for us.
311
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,140
- What do you say?
- Well, I have two questions.
312
00:12:47,141 --> 00:12:49,393
- Will there be a stipend?
- Yes.
313
00:12:49,394 --> 00:12:51,436
Ah. And what is a stipend?
314
00:12:51,437 --> 00:12:53,230
It's a fee for being in the commercial.
315
00:12:53,231 --> 00:12:54,564
I'm in.
316
00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:58,151
How do you know what's inside you
317
00:12:58,152 --> 00:13:00,570
unless you test yourself?
318
00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:02,072
Don't do one push-up,
319
00:13:02,073 --> 00:13:03,782
do 100.
320
00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:05,701
Don't run one mile,
321
00:13:05,702 --> 00:13:07,786
run a marathon.
322
00:13:07,787 --> 00:13:09,329
Don't have one family,
323
00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:13,208
have a second family
all the way across the country.
324
00:13:13,209 --> 00:13:15,252
Don't just have a second family,
325
00:13:15,253 --> 00:13:19,298
have a third family in Santa Fe
with an alternative lifestyle.
326
00:13:20,591 --> 00:13:22,926
Don't spend any time
with the first two families,
327
00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:25,137
make a commitment
to family number three,
328
00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:27,139
and double down by announcing it
329
00:13:27,140 --> 00:13:29,350
at his war-hero father's
retirement party.
330
00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:33,645
Don't go to the funeral,
331
00:13:33,646 --> 00:13:36,023
'cause, remember, you got
two other families to deal with
332
00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:37,858
and a marathon to train for.
333
00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:40,861
Don't just let Kenneth
walk out of your life,
334
00:13:40,862 --> 00:13:42,447
take his life from him.
335
00:13:43,406 --> 00:13:44,948
Don't just go to jail,
336
00:13:44,949 --> 00:13:47,909
go to death row by killing
the two other families.
337
00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:51,455
Don't just let anyone have
their closure by apologizing,
338
00:13:51,456 --> 00:13:54,124
send a message that
you're not afraid of hell.
339
00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:55,334
(BLEEP)
340
00:13:57,962 --> 00:13:59,463
Nike.
341
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,425
You may not know this,
but our full name is Nichael.
342
00:14:08,347 --> 00:14:09,973
Oh, my God! Peter Griffin!
343
00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,808
- Can I have your autograph?
- Sure.
344
00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:14,186
My friends are not
gonna believe I met you.
345
00:14:14,187 --> 00:14:15,645
'Cause I'm a known liar.
346
00:14:15,646 --> 00:14:18,523
- Okay.
- I love you. You're my hero.
347
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,358
I can fly.
348
00:14:20,359 --> 00:14:23,196
Okay, I'm ready to move on
to the next person.
349
00:14:24,072 --> 00:14:26,198
Well, now I don't know what to believe.
350
00:14:26,199 --> 00:14:28,033
Carter. What are you doing here?
351
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,993
Peter, ever since you made
that stupid commercial,
352
00:14:29,994 --> 00:14:31,828
my ticket sales have tanked!
353
00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:33,205
Thanks to you, people now think
354
00:14:33,206 --> 00:14:34,831
the Quahog Whooping Scalpers are racist!
355
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:36,792
You want me to sign your boobs?
356
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:39,169
Peter, your kneeling days are over.
357
00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:41,254
Two strikes, two outs,
bottom of the ninth,
358
00:14:41,255 --> 00:14:43,090
down by one, bases loaded,
Pewterschmidt up.
359
00:14:43,091 --> 00:14:45,050
Carter! Carter!
360
00:14:45,051 --> 00:14:47,052
He grounded out in the second,
struck out in the fifth.
361
00:14:47,053 --> 00:14:48,553
Hasn't been his day.
362
00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,180
Here's the wind-up, the pitch...
363
00:14:50,181 --> 00:14:52,182
Strike three! And he knew it.
364
00:14:57,188 --> 00:14:58,396
Aw. Cute.
365
00:14:58,397 --> 00:14:59,690
Look at the little birds.
366
00:15:03,236 --> 00:15:05,863
Oh. Disney's not gonna like that.
367
00:15:11,702 --> 00:15:13,411
Cleveland?
368
00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:15,789
Wha... Where am I?
369
00:15:15,790 --> 00:15:18,208
Welcome to WaQuahog.
370
00:15:26,968 --> 00:15:28,718
Oh, my God.
371
00:15:28,719 --> 00:15:30,846
Why wasn't this The Cleveland Show?
372
00:15:30,847 --> 00:15:34,892
This entire episode would have
been our season five premiere.
373
00:15:43,776 --> 00:15:46,570
What happened to me? Where am I?
374
00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,446
Have you ever seen Black Panther?
375
00:15:48,447 --> 00:15:50,157
No. No. God, no.
376
00:15:50,158 --> 00:15:53,118
Well, this is WaQuahog,
a secret part of Quahog
377
00:15:53,119 --> 00:15:56,079
with technology more advanced
than any nation.
378
00:15:56,080 --> 00:15:57,664
We brought you here to help you
379
00:15:57,665 --> 00:16:00,125
after you were attacked
for your activism.
380
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:02,252
Really? So I'm the only white guy
381
00:16:02,253 --> 00:16:04,087
who knows WaQuahog exists?
382
00:16:04,088 --> 00:16:06,965
Well, you and one Postmates guy.
383
00:16:06,966 --> 00:16:08,925
Hey, I got your Taco Bell breakfast.
384
00:16:08,926 --> 00:16:10,302
Thanks.
385
00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:13,305
Oh. I don't, uh,
I don't see a soda with that.
386
00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:14,347
Oh, yeah, sorry.
387
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,850
Um... do you want me to go back?
388
00:16:16,851 --> 00:16:18,852
Well, I mean... kinda.
389
00:16:18,853 --> 00:16:21,354
Okay, but since it's WaQuahog
it'll probably be, like,
390
00:16:21,355 --> 00:16:23,690
- 45 minutes, at least.
- Yeah. I mean,
391
00:16:23,691 --> 00:16:26,818
I ordered the soda
'cause I wanted the soda.
392
00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,445
Okay, man.
393
00:16:28,446 --> 00:16:31,198
- See you in, like, an hour.
- Right on.
394
00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:33,450
You better give him a big tip.
395
00:16:33,451 --> 00:16:37,162
Pretty sure the tip is already
built into the service charge.
396
00:16:43,794 --> 00:16:46,671
Wow! So this is, like, a secret kingdom
397
00:16:46,672 --> 00:16:48,381
cut off from the rest of the world?
398
00:16:48,382 --> 00:16:50,425
We got everything you need down here.
399
00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:52,802
Even our own WaQuahog TV channel.
400
00:16:52,803 --> 00:16:54,221
Oh, The Jeffersons.
401
00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:57,098
Yeah, but they edit
all the shows for syndication.
402
00:16:57,099 --> 00:17:01,896
- Weezy...
- ♪ Mmm... yeah. ♪
403
00:17:06,734 --> 00:17:09,069
- Now LeBron's a Laker.
- A Laker's now LeBron.
404
00:17:09,070 --> 00:17:10,320
Yeah, that's not really working out,
405
00:17:10,321 --> 00:17:12,155
but thanks for having me here, guys.
406
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:13,531
It is our pleasure.
407
00:17:13,532 --> 00:17:15,033
We want to thank you.
408
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:17,577
By taking a knee, you showed the world
409
00:17:17,578 --> 00:17:20,997
that you see the terrible
injustices our people face.
410
00:17:20,998 --> 00:17:25,460
Of course, being an activist,
you already know all about them.
411
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:26,795
Oh, boy.
412
00:17:26,796 --> 00:17:28,296
This is more uncomfortable
413
00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:30,882
than sports announcers
in a too-small booth.
414
00:17:30,883 --> 00:17:33,134
So, the Cowboys come in to today's game
415
00:17:33,135 --> 00:17:35,095
winners of four of their last five.
416
00:17:35,096 --> 00:17:36,972
So, Troy, what do they need to do
417
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,640
to beat this Eagles team today?
418
00:17:38,641 --> 00:17:40,517
Well, Joe, you and I were talking
419
00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:42,936
over chopped liver
and coffee this morning,
420
00:17:42,937 --> 00:17:45,480
and we said it has to start
with the run game.
421
00:17:45,481 --> 00:17:46,982
I remember after that
422
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:48,942
we Lady-and-the-Tramp'd
a croissant together
423
00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:51,695
and said this O-line needs
to get healthy.
424
00:17:51,696 --> 00:17:54,322
That's right, Joe.
And I hope the viewers out there
425
00:17:54,323 --> 00:17:57,158
can see by the fact that
our lips are almost touching
426
00:17:57,159 --> 00:17:59,995
that we are truly excited
about today's matchup.
427
00:17:59,996 --> 00:18:02,998
Straight from your mouth
into mine, partner.
428
00:18:02,999 --> 00:18:05,542
We do hope you'll join us in protest
429
00:18:05,543 --> 00:18:07,335
by kneeling at the next game.
430
00:18:07,336 --> 00:18:09,004
You bet I will!
431
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:11,214
C-Can I, can I just ask
one question, though?
432
00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:12,882
What are Migos?
433
00:18:12,883 --> 00:18:17,762
Peter, everyone has to find out
what Migos are for themselves.
434
00:18:22,518 --> 00:18:24,561
A lot of eyes on you today, Griffin.
435
00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:26,646
I'm counting on you
to do the right thing.
436
00:18:26,647 --> 00:18:28,690
The only kneelin'
I want around here is Kevin.
437
00:18:28,691 --> 00:18:29,816
Hey, Mr. Pewterschmidt...
438
00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:31,568
Front row seats... thanks
for having me at the game.
439
00:18:31,569 --> 00:18:33,903
Pleased to meet you, Kevin.
I've got some seats for you
440
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:35,655
- in the front row.
- Oh, great! Thanks!
441
00:18:35,656 --> 00:18:37,324
- Line of coke. Lead the way.
- Sure.
442
00:18:37,325 --> 00:18:39,659
Hey, what do you say
we take a pit stop in the...
443
00:18:39,660 --> 00:18:41,119
little boys' room.
444
00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:44,122
And now,
please rise for our national anthem
445
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:45,957
to be sung by Kevin Nealon.
446
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:48,918
And I have no idea
how he convinced me of that.
447
00:18:48,919 --> 00:18:51,297
I thought we were just talking
about other things.
448
00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:57,010
Oh, man. I don't know what to do.
449
00:18:57,011 --> 00:18:58,887
Kneel with us, brother.
450
00:18:58,888 --> 00:19:01,181
Whoa!
451
00:19:01,182 --> 00:19:03,391
That is good bathroom cocaine.
452
00:19:03,392 --> 00:19:04,976
Somebody's in this stall!
453
00:19:04,977 --> 00:19:06,020
That's it!
454
00:19:06,979 --> 00:19:08,313
Hey, listen up, everyone.
455
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:10,315
I have something
I need to come clean about.
456
00:19:12,026 --> 00:19:14,903
Cleveland, people of WaQuahog,
457
00:19:14,904 --> 00:19:18,239
I didn't kneel during the anthem
because I was an activist.
458
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,825
I kneeled because I had
fairly brutal diarrhea,
459
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:22,369
and I'm sorry.
460
00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:24,871
If I could take it back,
I would still kneel,
461
00:19:24,872 --> 00:19:26,915
but for the right reasons now.
462
00:19:26,916 --> 00:19:28,625
I see the struggle you face,
463
00:19:28,626 --> 00:19:30,711
and you deserve everyone's support.
464
00:19:31,712 --> 00:19:34,506
And, Carter, I know you're
just trying to honor the troops.
465
00:19:34,507 --> 00:19:36,424
- I never said that.
- But, honestly,
466
00:19:36,425 --> 00:19:38,218
why are we even playing
the national anthem
467
00:19:38,219 --> 00:19:39,636
at a sports event?
468
00:19:39,637 --> 00:19:42,430
It's not a solemn occasion,
like a military funeral
469
00:19:42,431 --> 00:19:45,392
or, or sex between Salma Hayek
and Ed Norton.
470
00:19:45,393 --> 00:19:46,393
It's a game.
471
00:19:46,394 --> 00:19:48,228
The problem isn't with each other,
472
00:19:48,229 --> 00:19:49,562
it's with the song.
473
00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:52,565
We need a new song,
one that unites all people.
474
00:19:52,566 --> 00:19:55,068
Why is your phone all pink and sparkly?
475
00:19:55,069 --> 00:19:57,195
- You're talking about it, aren't you?
- Oh, snap.
476
00:19:57,196 --> 00:20:01,366
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you
your new national anthem.
477
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:18,591
♪ Yeehaw! ♪
478
00:20:18,592 --> 00:20:19,801
♪ Here we go ♪
479
00:20:21,178 --> 00:20:22,804
I'm making my way to the bathroom.
480
00:20:22,805 --> 00:20:24,682
I have to poop again.
481
00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:33,106
Well, I'm glad
all that controversy is over
482
00:20:33,107 --> 00:20:34,774
and we got our old Peter back.
483
00:20:34,775 --> 00:20:36,359
But I kinda miss Meg.
484
00:20:36,360 --> 00:20:39,112
Oh, yeah, that's right.
She got traded to American Dad.
485
00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:41,448
I hear she's doing great.
486
00:20:44,118 --> 00:20:47,203
♪ Good morning, USA ♪
487
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:48,955
♪ Ba-da-ba-da-ba, Stan's the dad ♪
488
00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:50,874
♪ And the alien's gay ♪
489
00:20:50,875 --> 00:20:53,585
♪ And then there's a fishand a boy and a girl... ♪
490
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:54,836
Hey!
491
00:20:54,837 --> 00:20:56,129
Shut up, Meg.
492
00:20:56,130 --> 00:20:58,298
Oh. So it's just gonna be the same?
493
00:20:58,299 --> 00:20:59,382
Yup.
494
00:20:59,383 --> 00:21:00,968
Yeah.
36462
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