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I'm always doing things I don't like doing. I don't even know if I have an identity.

Who cares? There's even a song about it.

Chinese are the descendants of the country of the dragon.

We are a tough race, and we are born to conquer new lands.

And we bring our culture.

When things get better in the homeland, we will return.

- Homeland? - Yes.

Come here and then go back? What's the point?

Well, if I can't adapt, I'll go back.

- Can't adapt? - Yes.

What if you can't adapt when you get back? You must learn to adapt.

- Where's my shoe? - In your hand.

No, the other one. Help me find it.

- I think you've thrown it in the water. - Can you help me get it?

You just need to adapt, get used to it.

- Learn to adapt! - The hell with you.

Silly man!

Where's my car key? Shit, I lost it!

We'll have to walk back.

No, it's inside the car.

- You didn't lock the door? - No.

Hurry and open the door! Why didn't you lock the door?

- Don't your car doors lock automatically? - Of course not, you silly man.

What are you doing?

I'm learning how to drive. Then I can drive for you.

OK. Sit over here.

Move over.

Start the car.

- Start the car? - Yes.

You need to be in reverse gear.

You're in forward gear, so the car will go forward.

- Like this? - Yes, but don't turn the car so much.

Like this?

- What? You're stepping on my foot! - I'm just stepping on the brake.

- Don't drive so fast! - Why are you stepping on my foot?

Slower...

That's it.

Watch the road. Look behind you too.

Use the rear-view mirror!

Not so close. You'll only see your face. Look ahead.

- Change lane. - What is "lane"?

Change to that side. Turn your indicator on for changing lane.

Look ahead.

Don't be so nervous.

Or so relaxed!

I never realised you were such fun.

Watch the road.

Oh, no, traffic police! What should I do?

You don't even have a driver's licence! You can go to prison for that!

- Why don't we stop the car? - How can we?

We're in the middle of the road! We can't stop the car!

How about if we swap seats?

OK, but keep holding the steering wheel. I'm coming over.

Don't move.

Pull over.

How did we end up like this?

- You told me to... - keep holding the steering wheel.

- Hello officer. - Is there a problem here.

- No. - Would you mind to tell me what you're doing?

Uh, we just get married today.

- Yes. - Is that right?

Huh, honey?

- And who's driving now? - Me of course.

- You wouldn't mind showing me your driver's licence, would you? - Sure.

- What are you doing? - Looking for tissue to wipe my mouth.

- Here, officer. - Wait, right here.

What did you say to him?

I said I was teaching you how to drive.

So why did you kiss me?

No reason. It's no big deal. It's just how friends show they care for each other.

To kiss is to care for each other?

- I'm gonna cite you for reckless driving. - That's fine.

- And lady, if you wanna do it, do it on the sofa next time.

- It's a lot safer that way. Okay, thank you officer.

- And have a nice day! - Thank you, thank you.

- He still fined you? - Yes.

- What for? - For saying the wrong things.

What's going on here.

I'm trying to fill this prescription for uncle Tak, and you guys have screwed up everything.

Chica, this is our master's place!

If you're going to come in here, you're going to come in here with conpermiso!

- Why is the light still on? - The old man must be inside.

- But we killed the old man! - Let's check it out, come on let's go. - Okay.

Let's take her back to our boss!

Back off!

- Are you okay. - Yes, I am okay.

Let's show you what a real man can do!

- Get back! - Get her out of here, motherfucker, get the girl out.

Get! Fucking dog!

Shit!

PO CHI LUM

- Your joint is dislocated. Don't move. - He scared the hell of out me.

We're going to fight.

Anna is still out there somewhere.

Over there. Back up the car.

Are you OK?

Please it's no use! I can't practise anymore!

It'll be OK. Don't worry.

May, tell her her leg was dislocated.

I put it back in place. She'll recover soon. Tell her not to move so much.

- Master, are you OK? - I'm fine.

He'll fix your leg, you'll be OK. Don't worry.

Let me try.

You've already learned how to take advantage of girls?

What do you mean?

May said that in America, kissing a friend means that you care for them.

I don't know when they're coming, but don't be nervous.

Already, Master!

�rale, master!

Beat them I say.

Hit the ball, hit the ball!

Shit.

- Master, thanks. - Stupid.

Son of a bitch.

Watch out!

Let's get him!

Hey, crew-cut, my master has arrived.

My master defeated your master, who is now in hiding.

Your kung fu must be pretty basic. If you have the guts, come out and fight.

Let's get those bastards now.

Shit! Officer in trouble. Where are you guys?

Everybody break, you jokin' Bruce Lee?

Why is he crying?

He doesn't hold a green card. He's afraid of being sent back to Mexico.

Tell him to go right now.

We cannot leave this room.

We can only leave if the sergeant tells us to.

Wait a moment. Were there five of you?

One hasn't arrived yet.

One hasn't arrived yet.

Really? Let me share a little secret with all of you.

I'm gonna nail that son of a bitch to wall.

I'll get him for resisting arrest, destroying public property, assault.

A few more things, kicking me in the face.

You all did a good job.

Don't worry, it's clearly an act of self-defense.

All I want you to do, is stick around to testify in the court, OK?

- He says we can leave now. - What about the one behind him?

- I don't know. - Let's all shake his hand. I have an idea. - I want to thank you all, thank you very much.

Thanks.

- Tell him to take care of his health. - He said, "Take care of your health".

The Mexican boys cannot hide forever.

Hey, if Po Chi Lum hired them,

then after a few years they can apply for residency.

- I doubt it. - Why?

Master accepted an American as a pupil before. Now he dislikes all foreigners.

If he knew I'd taught these three clowns kung fu, he'd kill me.

Hiding like this is no different to being a fugitive. Life is meaningless.

- You'll be hiding too, if you stay. - Who says I'm staying?

There's no way I'll hide, even if my master asked me to.

Master.

Don't call me master again.

Master!

If you want to leave, leave! Don't say I'm forcing you.

- Master, please don't misunderstand. - Don't live in hiding.

If things go wrong, I don't want to be responsible.

Master, I talked without thinking. Please don't be mad at me.

I know it's tough for you. I'll stay a bit longer, OK?

Please forgive me.

I don't need your sympathy. You took those Mexicans as pupils.

When they turn on you and come to destroy my shop, give me a good funeral.

Master...

Leave! I don't want to see you again!

What's the deal, Oscar?

I've been calling you to bail my ass out of jail, where were you?

- I'm sorry Johnny, how did you get out? - My American Express Card, dumbshit.

Look at you, what's your problem? You look like a scared rabbit.

We're in deep shit, Johnny. All our stocks dumped, we're debt up to here.

Where can I go, Oscar? The whole world knows me. You got me into this shit, you tell me!

- We could go to China, you'll be a big star. - You go to hell!

Thanks for getting me the plane ticket so quickly.

Must you leave so soon? There are lots of places you haven't seen yet.

I came to America to see my master.

He tells me to leave. What other reason do I have to stay?

You really can't think of any other reason to stay longer?

No, I can't.

Can you think harder?

No.

Why don't you tell me one?

- It's not the right time to say. - Of course not! The bus is leaving soon.

How about this: If you have so much to say,

why not write me a letter so you can tell me everything you want to say.

- Let's leave it at that. Goodbye. - Goodbye.

Now that we've become friends, to show you I care...

I'm leaving now.

Is something wrong with your eyes? What happened?

No, I'm fine.

Remember to write!

Master!

Pupil...

Let's get our stuff and get out of here.

- Hallo. - Is that you old man?

- We got Anna all tied up, and if you wanna see her healthy again... - What? What are you saying?

Hey, come over here. Tell me what he's saying.

Talk to the the China man.

- Hallo. - Give me that.

Hello, Master Tak.

Anna has been kidnapped by us. My master wants to see you.

Hey, this dude's talking Chinese.

- Hello. - Look, old man, if you wanna see Anna alive again...

What did you say, asshole?

You're the asshole!

What? You can say "asshole"?

Anna is being held by my master.

You and your pupil, meet us at the NRB Building in half an hour.

If you don't come, Anna dies.

That's kidnap!

Quick, write down the address.

A pen!

- What's the address? - 1100 Wilshire Boulevard.

NRB Building, 1100 Wilshire?

What reason? What reason is there to stay?

Asked me to say it... and said there was something wrong with my eyes.

Silly man. He has problems with his eyes if he didn't realise!

Where's my passport? Looks like I forgot it.

Maybe I dropped it.

Does anyone know how to drive a bus?

Does anyone know how to drive a bus?

Thank you.

Is something wrong with the bus?

What are you doing here?

Thanks for your concern.

It's OK.

- What's a wig doing there? - That's not a wig.

Hurry and take me to get my passport.

Why did you come in here?

There's a letter here.

- Letter? What does it say? - I can't read Chinese.

How can you not read Chinese?

It's a bit dark in here...

"Miss May, in case I encounter any misfortune,

please pass Po Chi Lum on to my pupil, Jet, to run it."

Signed, Chan Hou Tak.

Misfortune?

Misfortune?

Misfortune.

- Misfortune. - Yes.

What the hell is that? Is it good or bad?

Of course it's bad. It means something's gone wrong!

I don't even know where to find him!

What?

- What is it? - It's a place.

- Do you know how to get there? - Of course I do!

So what are you waiting for?

How can you pull me like that?

You pulled me earlier. Why can't I pull you?

We're finally here, we're finally reached the top.

Fall in!

Shit! How am I supposed to fight all these people?

- You guys stay here. - Be careful, Uncle Tak.

Whoever defeats this old man, and brings him to me on his knees...

will be promoted to the highest order in my school.

Four.

Attack in four.

Fathead! You tought these guys kung-fu?

- Ten. - Attack in ten.

- More. - Attack in ten.

Let's get the fuck out of here. Let's go!

Where'd you go stupid! Where'd you get to? The next time you go, I'm gonna kill you.

Sorry, I say, Merry Christmas.

�rale.

Ya basta.

Students.

Uncle Tak.

Uncle Tak.

Master? Master?

You haven't left yet?

I read your letter and knew something was wrong.

- Oh, that's my will. - Will?

You don't have to die. I'm staying to help you.

Master!

Pupil, beware of that Blondie.

- He's cunning, and I really don't know... - I will, Master.

No need to help me.

- Would you like to sit down and rest? - Nonsense!

Welcome to the game of death.

Even if you beat him, he'll still come back.

I'll keep him busy while you and the Latinos rescue Anna.

Be careful. He's very cunning. We'll save Anna.

Anna.

- Let go of the rope. - Let her go.

Help.

- Master, are you all right? - I'm fine.

Come on.

- Are you all right as well? - I'm fine too.

You have some skills.

I have more than you think.

I have more, more and more!

You will lose!

Are we finished yet?

Still won't stop?

Gas?

Now you can't move, how can you fight?

What are you waiting for, you son of a bitch. Finish me.

OK. Finish.

You bastard!

Come back up, quickly!

Take care of these clowns.

All right, everybody freeze!Put your hands on your heads, hold it right there.

Move out of the way. Police business!

Master!

- Master, I'm glad you're here! - Pupil, we're glad you're here too!

- You know what. I'm going to miss you. - Really?

Give me a kiss.

Uncle Tak, Bye-bye.

Thanks very much.

You get my hat, OK?

- Bye-bye. - Thanks

Bye-bye.

Bye-bye.

Bye you guys, bye assholes, goodbye.

Bye-bye XO.

No, Uncle Tak, no.

Sorry, mom.

- Hey, I hear Canada's not so bad. - Let's check out America first. It's so big.

Sure, but if Canada is good it's worth considering.

We're not afraid to cross the ocean. The Chinese will go anywhere under the sun.

I know, master.

Jet, masters never see their pupils as grown-ups.

That's why I treat you like a child. Don't be angry with me.

How could I be, master?

- You still have the tag on your jacket. - Don't pull it off.

I bought it to see you off. I'll take it back after this and tell them it doesn't fit.

It's OK to do that in America.

Remember that you don't have to pay to wear new clothes. Let's go.

Go on now and get home quickly. Let's go.

Hey, your suit has a tag too!

Glad I didn't take it off - I couldn't return it.

Even if you had, you can always tie it back on. Take care.

- Master, take good care. - Don't keep me waiting too long.

- Give my regards to May. - OK.

She's stuck in a meeting with Mr Egg Tart. She says to send her a postcard.

Tell her to work hard.

You lied to your master that you're staying in the US. You are cunning.

- What are you doing here? - Me?

As I couldn't think of a reason for you to stay, I decided to go with you.

- No kidding? - Yes!

Where are you going to stay?

- At your place? - At my place?

- Are you married? - No...

I'd better check I have my passport.

Shit, shit, shit...

- I think I forgot it again. - Really? Hurry and check carefully.

These are my underpants. Stop peeping.

My hand still hurts.

Master!

Your passport's with me. I'll get you a visa for Canada!

See you later!

Are you crying or laughing?

I don't have my passport, so I can't leave.

So you're going to Hong Kong by yourself.

Try to stay in a hotel. But there might not be a room.

Eat this!

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