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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:10,442 --> 00:00:16,319 � Why must I be a teenager in love? 2 00:00:16,320 --> 00:00:19,467 � Each time we have a quarrel 3 00:00:19,625 --> 00:00:22,504 � it almost breaks my heart 4 00:00:22,761 --> 00:00:25,473 � 'Cause I'm so afraid 5 00:00:25,729 --> 00:00:28,206 � that we will have to part 6 00:00:28,594 --> 00:00:34,470 � Each night I ask the stars up above 7 00:00:34,471 --> 00:00:39,763 � Why must I be a teenager in love? 8 00:00:40,840 --> 00:00:43,000 � Each time we have a quarrel 9 00:00:43,817 --> 00:00:46,288 � it almost breaks my heart 10 00:00:46,777 --> 00:00:49,035 � 'Cause I'm so afraid 11 00:00:49,710 --> 00:00:52,135 � that we will have to part 12 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:54,040 God in Heaven. 13 00:00:54,353 --> 00:00:56,155 Must be yonks since he was a teenager. 14 00:00:56,605 --> 00:00:57,557 In or out of love. 15 00:00:58,606 --> 00:00:59,462 Yeah. Well. There you go. 16 00:01:00,315 --> 00:01:02,772 If he keeps this up, he'll empty the place. 17 00:01:03,948 --> 00:01:06,151 -He can do what he likes, can't he? -Oh? 18 00:01:06,838 --> 00:01:07,345 Can he? 19 00:01:08,619 --> 00:01:10,070 He is only the bloody owner, enn'e? 20 00:01:11,635 --> 00:01:13,170 I mean, it's his place, darling. 21 00:01:13,424 --> 00:01:16,114 � if you should say we're through 22 00:01:16,121 --> 00:01:19,306 � Well if you want to make me cry 23 00:01:19,884 --> 00:01:22,064 � that won't be so hard to do 24 00:01:22,788 --> 00:01:25,149 � If you should say goodbye 25 00:01:25,437 --> 00:01:28,335 � I'd still go on loving you 26 00:01:28,866 --> 00:01:34,713 � Each night I ask the stars up above 27 00:01:34,848 --> 00:01:40,712 � Why must I be a teenager in love? 28 00:01:40,812 --> 00:01:43,885 � I cried a tear (1: DINSDAG) 29 00:01:44,005 --> 00:01:46,547 � for nobody but you 30 00:01:47,237 --> 00:01:51,949 � I'll be a lonely one if you should say we're through 31 00:01:52,307 --> 00:01:58,812 � Well if you want to make me cry that won't be so hard to do 32 00:01:59,001 --> 00:02:02,701 � and if you should say goodbye I'll still go on... 33 00:02:02,708 --> 00:02:03,758 Loving you 34 00:02:05,685 --> 00:02:08,072 On what? -Sorry? 35 00:02:08,405 --> 00:02:09,277 Oh nothing, I... 36 00:02:10,568 --> 00:02:13,736 This is all a bit undignified, isn't it? 37 00:02:14,315 --> 00:02:17,165 I think I was thinking about something else, 38 00:02:17,239 --> 00:02:21,821 at least... I hope I was thinking about thinking about something else. 39 00:02:23,575 --> 00:02:28,316 Well, Mr Feeld, I'm now going to insert this soft tube into your rectum. 40 00:02:28,610 --> 00:02:30,754 I'm now definitely thinking about something else, 41 00:02:30,805 --> 00:02:32,677 spare me the guided tour, please. 42 00:02:32,751 --> 00:02:34,802 Oh, it's not too uncomfortable I assure you. But... 43 00:02:34,816 --> 00:02:36,697 you'll feel as though you want to defecate, 44 00:02:36,963 --> 00:02:39,797 Needless to say, I'd be extremely grateful if you didn't. 45 00:02:40,261 --> 00:02:44,585 God, no. I've been well and truly purged anyway, and. Oops. Sorry. 46 00:02:45,004 --> 00:02:46,406 I don't mind coming out that end. 47 00:02:46,419 --> 00:02:49,974 But if you could resist the urge to -um- OK? 48 00:02:58,763 --> 00:02:59,685 Here it goes. 49 00:03:03,854 --> 00:03:06,111 The liquid barium is going in. 50 00:03:07,698 --> 00:03:09,188 Comfortable? All right? 51 00:03:10,296 --> 00:03:14,506 You'll be able to see what's going on in your intestines by looking at that little monitor above... 52 00:03:15,715 --> 00:03:17,658 Not my sort of drama, doctor. 53 00:03:20,280 --> 00:03:23,674 And I didn't play with frog spawn when I was a kid either. 54 00:03:25,539 --> 00:03:26,923 And on to your tommy. 55 00:03:35,473 --> 00:03:38,190 EACH TIME WE HAVE A QUARREL 56 00:03:38,217 --> 00:03:40,988 IT ALMOST BREAKS MY HEART 57 00:03:41,161 --> 00:03:43,054 He can do what he likes, can't he? 58 00:03:47,422 --> 00:03:49,467 Could you say that again, please, sir? 59 00:03:49,653 --> 00:03:51,377 CLA RIJJIS. 60 00:03:51,671 --> 00:03:54,477 No, no. Her adress here in the United Kingdom. 61 00:03:56,610 --> 00:03:58,806 Her home here. -What? 62 00:03:58,906 --> 00:04:00,619 In England. 63 00:04:01,025 --> 00:04:02,041 Where does she live? 64 00:04:02,141 --> 00:04:06,351 I said. I said. CLA RIJJIS. 65 00:04:06,749 --> 00:04:10,861 Cla Rijjis. How do you... 66 00:04:11,611 --> 00:04:14,017 Oh, Claridge's? The hotel? 67 00:04:14,139 --> 00:04:17,952 I said. I said. CLA RIJJIS. -Sorry sir. I'm sorry. 68 00:04:18,598 --> 00:04:21,101 And if I could just have your - um - 69 00:04:21,729 --> 00:04:24,201 your mother's date of birth. 70 00:04:24,301 --> 00:04:26,108 What? What. What do you say? 71 00:04:26,115 --> 00:04:28,541 Her age sir. Please. 72 00:04:29,256 --> 00:04:30,537 How old is she? 73 00:04:31,092 --> 00:04:32,631 When was she born? 74 00:04:32,902 --> 00:04:35,175 ??? 75 00:04:35,657 --> 00:04:38,016 ??? 76 00:04:39,474 --> 00:04:42,824 61. She is 61. 77 00:04:42,924 --> 00:04:44,982 61? Oh, but... 78 00:04:45,082 --> 00:04:49,090 6-1. 6-1. Sixty bloody one. 79 00:04:49,164 --> 00:04:51,137 That was a great year for St Emilion, 80 00:04:51,144 --> 00:04:53,063 but I should be drunk now, OK? 81 00:04:53,117 --> 00:04:54,199 Who in charge here? Eh? Eh? 82 00:04:54,299 --> 00:04:56,912 Well Ben. That wasn't as bad as my thoughts had made it to be. 83 00:04:56,917 --> 00:04:59,896 My dignity does not, after all, reside in my bum-hole. 84 00:04:59,996 --> 00:05:02,759 Good. Good. But it took longer than my thoughts, Daniel. 85 00:05:02,777 --> 00:05:05,257 And I think I'm going to be date for my late. 86 00:05:06,248 --> 00:05:09,961 It was the second bit I didn't like very much. The barium was fine... well, ish... 87 00:05:10,061 --> 00:05:12,912 but then they go and pump air up your arse. 88 00:05:12,980 --> 00:05:17,145 Air? What do you mean air? - It's to extend the lower bowel or something. 89 00:05:18,954 --> 00:05:21,937 Christ, I thought I was going to float out of there like the Graf Zepplin. 90 00:05:22,565 --> 00:05:25,126 Wish you had been able to float, Daniel. 91 00:05:25,144 --> 00:05:28,855 Why the heck don't you finally, finally learn to drive? 92 00:05:28,871 --> 00:05:30,610 Surely it'd make a sot of lense. 93 00:05:30,710 --> 00:05:33,641 Now. Now. Your spoonerisms are showing, Ben! 94 00:05:34,670 --> 00:05:37,626 Look - if I can't call on you, as my agent, 95 00:05:37,644 --> 00:05:41,042 for the occasional if demeaning bit of comfort and chauffeuring. 96 00:05:41,050 --> 00:05:45,037 then I'm pretty sure that there are few other grand literary agents in this town 97 00:05:45,385 --> 00:05:49,670 who would be quite willing to oblige. And without getting their words back to front! 98 00:05:51,352 --> 00:05:53,262 Dan. Are you all right? 99 00:05:54,317 --> 00:05:56,535 How much did I earn last year, Ben? 100 00:05:56,553 --> 00:06:02,505 Hey now. What's all this. You know very well I don't mind driving you to something like this 101 00:06:02,523 --> 00:06:06,317 but I mo have a deeting. - No. Come on. How much? Last year? 102 00:06:06,808 --> 00:06:11,523 488.724,80 pond, bruto. 103 00:06:11,523 --> 00:06:14,178 Jesus Christ on a bike! 104 00:06:14,278 --> 00:06:16,353 And you know it just like that. 105 00:06:16,371 --> 00:06:20,225 To the pearest nenny. Nearest p-penny. 106 00:06:20,495 --> 00:06:23,509 You know, I had no idea it would be as much as... 107 00:06:23,527 --> 00:06:28,003 When are they going to catch on, those studios paying for drafts they never actually make... ? 108 00:06:29,498 --> 00:06:30,646 So... let's see... 109 00:06:30,927 --> 00:06:35,732 you yourself, Ben Baglin, you make forty-eight thou... 110 00:06:35,832 --> 00:06:41,094 No, nearly forty-nine thousand pounds in twelve months from my scratchy old pen, eh? 111 00:06:41,113 --> 00:06:43,266 And then you kick up a fuss about... -No, you look. 112 00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:47,364 I mean, heavens... I mean, it's not as though you haven't done it often enough before, now is it? 113 00:06:48,446 --> 00:06:51,907 I don't want to do it with him at all, thank you very bleed'n much. 114 00:06:53,503 --> 00:06:55,181 But they are speaking my... 115 00:06:56,494 --> 00:06:59,762 It's not as though you got to keep on doing wiv him, now is it? 116 00:06:59,772 --> 00:07:02,862 I don't wanna do it at all, fanks very much. 117 00:07:02,962 --> 00:07:07,467 I mean, Christ... I mean, it's not as though you ain't done it often enough before... 118 00:07:07,477 --> 00:07:10,423 What do you mean? - Oh, come on Angel 119 00:07:10,441 --> 00:07:13,658 You have done more bleeding blokes than I had bleed'n... 120 00:07:13,668 --> 00:07:16,457 Daniel. Daniel what are you saying here? Come on. 121 00:07:16,557 --> 00:07:17,937 You're joking, right? 122 00:07:17,947 --> 00:07:20,578 They were speaking my lines. - No, no, no. 123 00:07:20,605 --> 00:07:22,633 It's been happening to me all morning, Ben. 124 00:07:23,471 --> 00:07:29,166 This man burbling on the radio when I woke up... OK, OK, it was in a different context, yes, all that... 125 00:07:30,193 --> 00:07:33,943 but suddenly he comes out with an excact same sentence from my Karaoke script. 126 00:07:33,970 --> 00:07:36,523 And then... - But that is cure poincidence. 127 00:07:36,541 --> 00:07:38,697 And then when I was about to have the barium enema, 128 00:07:38,715 --> 00:07:40,710 I distinctly heard 129 00:07:40,749 --> 00:07:43,541 the song that begins the whole story... 130 00:07:43,559 --> 00:07:46,927 you know, `Why must I be a...' -What do you mean, heard? 131 00:07:46,945 --> 00:07:49,340 Like Joan of Arc, do you mean... 132 00:07:49,358 --> 00:07:54,078 And then afterwards, the nurse, she... or I thought she... 133 00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:56,675 Oh, what's the point. 134 00:07:58,376 --> 00:08:03,939 All I know is... All I know is... something very strange is... 135 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:10,166 You've just been feeling a bit low, Daniel. 136 00:08:10,184 --> 00:08:13,350 That stomach ache, and... forgive me, 137 00:08:13,368 --> 00:08:15,864 but I'll say it just once more, I promise. 138 00:08:15,882 --> 00:08:18,822 Don't you think you're drinking just a bit too much? 139 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:23,392 Drop me here, stop. - Aw, Daniel, come on... 140 00:08:23,410 --> 00:08:25,277 No, no, it's just that... No. 141 00:08:25,295 --> 00:08:27,314 I've decided not to go to the cutting room. 142 00:08:27,332 --> 00:08:30,497 This bloody tummy-ache, it's... 143 00:08:30,597 --> 00:08:33,579 No. If you put me down here, 144 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:36,918 I can beat that one-way system and cut through to my flat. 145 00:08:36,936 --> 00:08:41,273 I need to lie down for a bit. Or walk for a bit. Or something.. 146 00:08:53,073 --> 00:08:55,668 You want me to call the cutting room? Or anybody? 147 00:08:55,686 --> 00:08:58,370 I'm seeing flap, flap, rush, rush Anna for dinner tonight, anyway. 148 00:08:58,388 --> 00:09:01,743 We are going to that brasserie where they filmed the opening. Yuk. 149 00:09:01,761 --> 00:09:06,433 She'll talks about drink too. 150 00:09:06,451 --> 00:09:08,891 And to as little effect, I promise you. 151 00:09:28,206 --> 00:09:32,016 � Your cheatin' heart 152 00:09:32,034 --> 00:09:35,470 � Will make you weep 153 00:09:35,704 --> 00:09:39,567 � You'll cry and cry 154 00:09:39,585 --> 00:09:43,138 � And try to sleep... 155 00:09:43,156 --> 00:09:46,817 � But sleep won't come 156 00:09:46,835 --> 00:09:50,704 � The whole night through 157 00:09:50,722 --> 00:09:54,546 � Your cheatin' heart 158 00:09:56,759 --> 00:09:58,220 � Will tell on you 159 00:09:58,238 --> 00:10:01,970 � When tears come down 160 00:10:02,029 --> 00:10:04,748 � Like falling rain 161 00:10:05,718 --> 00:10:09,236 � You'll toss around 162 00:10:09,254 --> 00:10:13,311 � And call my name 163 00:10:13,329 --> 00:10:16,814 � ... you'll walk the floor 164 00:10:16,832 --> 00:10:20,247 � The way I do 165 00:10:20,256 --> 00:10:24,683 � Your cheatin' heart 166 00:10:24,701 --> 00:10:27,125 � Will tell on you 167 00:10:30,117 --> 00:10:32,032 Oh. It's the fan. 168 00:10:33,172 --> 00:10:36,381 Of course. 169 00:10:38,714 --> 00:10:41,358 Sorry, Mr Morse...? - What? 170 00:10:41,868 --> 00:10:44,444 Sorry, I thought you spoke... - I ? 171 00:10:44,871 --> 00:10:46,709 No, no. My mistake. 172 00:10:46,727 --> 00:10:49,603 Ah. I see. You think that I talk to myself, do you? 173 00:10:49,621 --> 00:10:51,694 No Mr Morse. Of course not. 174 00:10:51,713 --> 00:10:53,397 Then why are you hovering? 175 00:10:55,431 --> 00:10:57,885 I just thought you wanted something... 176 00:10:57,903 --> 00:10:59,617 Oh, but I do. 177 00:11:00,583 --> 00:11:04,377 All old men want to call back yesterday. 178 00:11:07,041 --> 00:11:11,543 But I don't imagine for one moment that this establishment could offer up... 179 00:11:11,561 --> 00:11:13,806 Dear God. 180 00:11:31,627 --> 00:11:35,328 I mean... it's not as though you got to keep on doing it wiv him, now is it? 181 00:11:35,346 --> 00:11:38,067 Don't want to do it with him at all, fanks bleed'n much. 182 00:11:38,085 --> 00:11:42,533 I mean, Christ...it's not as though you haven't done it often enough before. 183 00:11:42,551 --> 00:11:45,574 What do you mean? - Oh. come on, Angel. 184 00:11:45,988 --> 00:11:49,520 You've had more bonks wiv more blokes than I've had bleed'n Weetabix. 185 00:11:49,538 --> 00:11:53,299 Now look I've hardly ever never done it for the... 186 00:11:55,495 --> 00:11:56,724 No! Not for the money! 187 00:11:59,361 --> 00:12:02,052 I want a thousand down on the table before I even... 188 00:12:02,458 --> 00:12:07,061 You've got a bloody cheek, Peter. Sod off! - Hey. Hey. Watch that lip 189 00:12:10,811 --> 00:12:14,148 No, no, no. I know what you... No. 190 00:12:14,184 --> 00:12:18,045 No. It's very clearly her we want to see, Ian. 191 00:12:18,081 --> 00:12:20,180 Is it? - I know it is. 192 00:12:20,216 --> 00:12:21,089 Are you sure? 193 00:12:21,125 --> 00:12:24,778 I know it is. Full stop. - Fine. Period. 194 00:12:25,090 --> 00:12:27,361 I'm not saying I disagree, Nick 195 00:12:27,379 --> 00:12:30,578 But I think Ian has something of a point when he... - Who was that? 196 00:12:30,614 --> 00:12:33,426 On the phone. - Oh, Ben Baglin. 197 00:12:33,462 --> 00:12:36,490 `Back-to-front-Ben'. Daniel Feeld's agent. 198 00:12:36,516 --> 00:12:39,575 Daniel Feeld. Words never back to front. 199 00:12:39,615 --> 00:12:44,791 In his scripts they are supposedly in a perfect pre-ordained by Almighty God himself. 200 00:12:44,827 --> 00:12:46,894 Daniel Feeld. The precious bastard. 201 00:12:46,930 --> 00:12:50,174 I.. It seems he can't come to the cutting room until tomorrow. He is not very... 202 00:12:50,210 --> 00:12:53,478 Thank God for that. Perhaps we can get on a bit at last. 203 00:12:53,520 --> 00:12:56,946 But he'll have his say, you know. Especially about the music. 204 00:12:56,982 --> 00:13:04,404 Och now... he will! And his funny old agent will tell you to take a junnig rump. 205 00:14:11,969 --> 00:14:20,942 EEC Counsel Directive 89 stroke 622. 206 00:14:21,945 --> 00:14:25,826 You pig. You indulgent pig. 207 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:29,494 Obey the EEC! Obey! 208 00:14:46,404 --> 00:14:50,780 Aaaaaagh! The health Police! 209 00:14:54,676 --> 00:14:57,579 I confess. - Daniel. 210 00:14:57,650 --> 00:15:00,137 Good afternoon. Nigel here. 211 00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:04,527 I've had the plates biked around me, and I think I can safely tell you what's wrong with you. 212 00:15:04,553 --> 00:15:08,043 Well. Join the queue, Doctor, it's like a Harrods sale. 213 00:15:08,770 --> 00:15:13,203 You are suffering from sigmoid spastic colon, Daniel. 214 00:15:13,257 --> 00:15:16,201 It's these spasms which gave you the pain. 215 00:15:16,255 --> 00:15:19,187 You can actually see what is going on when you look at the plates. 216 00:15:19,232 --> 00:15:21,620 Anyway, I've got your prescription ready. 217 00:15:21,674 --> 00:15:25,778 I'll have it biked around to Ben's office and someone there will file it and bring you the pills. 218 00:15:25,832 --> 00:15:29,666 They're called Spasmonal. Stop the spasms. OK? 219 00:15:32,114 --> 00:15:33,395 And then let's see. 220 00:15:34,060 --> 00:15:36,051 Spastic colon? 221 00:15:36,060 --> 00:15:39,139 Is that what you're calling it? Sounds sweet. 222 00:15:39,184 --> 00:15:42,435 Or what is popularly known as IBS... 223 00:15:42,444 --> 00:15:44,310 Irritable Bowel Syndrome. 224 00:15:44,319 --> 00:15:48,226 Use witchever diagnoses impresses whomsoever the most. 225 00:15:48,235 --> 00:15:50,641 I'm sorry it's not a little more dramatic. 226 00:15:50,650 --> 00:15:54,450 Well, I've known for a long time that I've got an irritable head syndrome... 227 00:15:55,150 --> 00:15:58,011 But is that all it is? And what causes it? 228 00:15:58,137 --> 00:16:00,245 In a word, stress. 229 00:16:00,281 --> 00:16:02,897 Fucking nonsense. Stress. Me? 230 00:16:02,933 --> 00:16:06,143 I'm as gentle as the beat of an angel's wings. 231 00:16:46,136 --> 00:16:51,322 The words of the song come up on the lower half of the screen, in English, 232 00:16:51,358 --> 00:16:53,674 sandwiched by Japanese. 233 00:16:53,710 --> 00:17:00,648 At the same time, from the start, a male voice is singing badly with an East End accent, 234 00:17:00,684 --> 00:17:06,685 the same words as they march across the screen, darkening on cue... 235 00:17:08,747 --> 00:17:10,401 Slow dissolve. 236 00:17:11,344 --> 00:17:14,309 � I cried a tear 237 00:17:14,346 --> 00:17:17,039 � for nobody but you 238 00:17:17,075 --> 00:17:19,559 � I'll be a lonely one... 239 00:17:19,595 --> 00:17:22,393 � if you should say we're through 240 00:17:22,429 --> 00:17:25,838 � Well if you want to make me cry 241 00:17:25,874 --> 00:17:28,623 � that won't be so hard to do 242 00:17:28,659 --> 00:17:31,974 � and if you should say goodbye 243 00:17:32,010 --> 00:17:34,871 � I'll still go on loving you 244 00:17:34,907 --> 00:17:41,013 � Each night I ask the stars up above 245 00:17:41,049 --> 00:17:46,950 � Why must I be a teenager in love? 246 00:17:46,986 --> 00:17:50,318 � I cried a tear 247 00:17:50,318 --> 00:17:52,689 � for nobody but you 248 00:17:52,725 --> 00:17:56,702 I'll be a lonely one if you should say... 249 00:17:56,738 --> 00:18:01,802 What? Oh yes. That song... 250 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:04,843 The song at the start of Karaoke. 251 00:18:06,637 --> 00:18:08,811 The baptismal bounce. 252 00:18:08,864 --> 00:18:11,971 Well... yes. - What do you mean? 253 00:18:12,079 --> 00:18:15,758 Aren't you sure, Ms Producer? - Sure? 254 00:18:15,839 --> 00:18:20,607 Hey, babe. What's that steak made off? Asbestos. Cork. What? 255 00:18:20,617 --> 00:18:24,833 Maybe. Or my brain. - Your what? 256 00:18:25,805 --> 00:18:28,307 You live alone, don't you, Daniel? 257 00:18:30,875 --> 00:18:33,800 No wife, no misstres. 258 00:18:34,281 --> 00:18:39,850 The occasional sleazy and all but commercial sneeze-like bonk, 259 00:18:39,860 --> 00:18:43,283 preferably with someone who has more to lose than I have. 260 00:18:43,293 --> 00:18:46,492 No children. No commitments. No cleaner. 261 00:18:46,502 --> 00:18:52,596 And, please note, and a capacity for minding my own business. 262 00:18:52,696 --> 00:18:56,675 Well, that's all very nice. - Except? 263 00:18:56,685 --> 00:18:59,242 Except it makes you forget how to talk to people. 264 00:18:59,252 --> 00:19:01,648 And how to treat your colleagues. 265 00:19:01,748 --> 00:19:08,753 Or even how to be even halfway polite. - But it was a crucial, comic opening song in my script, Anna... 266 00:19:08,763 --> 00:19:11,013 Where we first see that sleazy place, 267 00:19:11,023 --> 00:19:13,539 and Arthur Mallion bellowing the words so badly. 268 00:19:13,549 --> 00:19:19,401 `Pig' Mallion, the blackmailer, the real, foul-mouthed heavy. 269 00:19:20,141 --> 00:19:23,985 Why do they do it, restaurants? 270 00:19:23,995 --> 00:19:25,872 Muzak, or whatever? 271 00:19:25,882 --> 00:19:29,613 To fill the empty and divert the bored. 272 00:19:29,623 --> 00:19:31,765 What else? Showbiz. Essence off. 273 00:19:31,775 --> 00:19:33,874 I usually manage to shut it out. 274 00:19:33,884 --> 00:19:39,162 I mean, if you let background music get to you, you'd hardly ever be able to eat out at all. 275 00:19:39,172 --> 00:19:42,229 They even do it in funeral parlours nowadays. 276 00:19:42,239 --> 00:19:48,071 `On the Sunny Side of the Street' or... um... `Life is Just a Bowl of Cherries'. Eh? 277 00:19:48,897 --> 00:19:53,121 Each night I ask the stars up above, 278 00:19:54,232 --> 00:19:58,335 why must I be a teenager in love? 279 00:20:01,028 --> 00:20:05,143 Too on the nose. - That's the point. Smack on the schnoz, my love. 280 00:20:05,153 --> 00:20:07,551 No, I mean to be really funny, or... 281 00:20:08,398 --> 00:20:11,843 And it just sort of lies there, that song. 282 00:20:11,943 --> 00:20:15,087 Nick isn't... well, you know what Nick's like... 283 00:20:15,187 --> 00:20:16,601 But he isn't happy with it. 284 00:20:16,611 --> 00:20:18,532 Aaa, poor lickle ting! 285 00:20:18,632 --> 00:20:21,126 And he wants to change it. - Well, he can't. 286 00:20:22,018 --> 00:20:23,913 And in any case he's alresdy shot it. 287 00:20:24,501 --> 00:20:27,361 It was on one of those bloody awful casettes you sent me. 288 00:20:27,461 --> 00:20:30,329 He shot an alternative version. - He what? 289 00:20:30,339 --> 00:20:32,658 He's... Daniel, it's not a bad choice as such... 290 00:20:32,758 --> 00:20:34,375 same sort of... 291 00:20:34,385 --> 00:20:37,523 He's used `Your Cheatin'Heart'. The Hank Williams number. And it... 292 00:20:37,533 --> 00:20:39,019 Wait there. 293 00:20:40,713 --> 00:20:42,604 Don't move. 294 00:20:45,749 --> 00:20:47,541 ... and that was what he said. 295 00:20:47,551 --> 00:20:50,276 God, I was in stitches! - Hurry up. 296 00:20:50,286 --> 00:20:54,106 `Wot? Wot'? he said. `All bloody right then,' he said. 297 00:20:54,116 --> 00:20:57,206 What do you call a fish that hasn't got an eye... 298 00:20:57,216 --> 00:20:58,682 Are you going to be long? 299 00:20:58,692 --> 00:21:00,514 Oh, God, Annie... wait for it... 300 00:21:00,524 --> 00:21:02,480 I said are you... 301 00:21:02,490 --> 00:21:06,238 It's a fish. Get it? A fish. No ``i'', see. 302 00:21:13,222 --> 00:21:17,547 Oh, shit. - ...Listen to her. 303 00:21:45,422 --> 00:21:48,306 REALITY ... OR NOTHING 304 00:21:57,360 --> 00:22:01,217 At last! Ben... what the... Ben, this is Daniel... 305 00:22:01,227 --> 00:22:04,228 What the hell are you doing, man? - Doing? Doing? 306 00:22:04,238 --> 00:22:09,367 I'm up to my neck in scripts as usual, what do you think I'm ducking fooing? 307 00:22:09,377 --> 00:22:12,624 Well, you certainly take half a decade to answer! The point is this... 308 00:22:12,634 --> 00:22:16,922 that snotty, chinless bastard Nick Balmer 309 00:22:16,932 --> 00:22:19,772 has taken it in into his puffed-up apology for a head 310 00:22:19,782 --> 00:22:22,594 to tamper with Karaoke, and I want you 311 00:22:22,604 --> 00:22:26,573 straight at once! Ben! I want you... - Is everything all right madam? 312 00:22:26,583 --> 00:22:30,019 Oh, yes. Splendid, thank you. Dinner with a lunatic. 313 00:22:30,029 --> 00:22:32,846 It's part of the community care programme. 314 00:22:38,362 --> 00:22:41,871 Well, we'll soon have that sorted out. I hope. 315 00:22:41,881 --> 00:22:45,174 Daniel. For Christ sake. - Oh. You haven't finished eating, have you? 316 00:22:45,274 --> 00:22:50,371 Didn't you like it, or... Hey. And your glass is empty! I'm sorry. 317 00:22:50,381 --> 00:22:54,560 Oh God. Haven't you had enough already? - I knew you'd say that. 318 00:23:00,258 --> 00:23:05,457 I'm sorry. Look. I'm not the sort of writer 319 00:23:05,467 --> 00:23:12,307 who thinks that his words on the page are some kind of holy writ in tablets of stone. 320 00:23:12,317 --> 00:23:17,313 No? Well then... put down your chisel. 321 00:23:32,348 --> 00:23:36,527 This is... weird. Sort of creepy. - How do you mean? 322 00:23:36,537 --> 00:23:38,807 Well, I felt a bit unsettled eating here in the first place. 323 00:23:38,817 --> 00:23:41,060 Your choice, fella. 324 00:23:41,070 --> 00:23:48,251 I mean, the place where you lot filmed on that Sunday all those months ago. 325 00:23:48,351 --> 00:23:52,989 The self-same place. And here they are playing the first song in the script. 326 00:23:52,999 --> 00:23:58,008 And it will be, Anna. It will be! 327 00:24:00,457 --> 00:24:02,985 I don't like the song, of course, 328 00:24:03,085 --> 00:24:07,017 but I hate the other one... and it doesn't have the same resona... 329 00:24:08,770 --> 00:24:11,709 What is the matter? 330 00:24:12,084 --> 00:24:18,095 Oh. It's the fan. - Daniel. 331 00:24:18,105 --> 00:24:21,359 The fan... reflected on the top of the... 332 00:24:22,528 --> 00:24:28,210 For a moment I thought I was getting a message from somewhere else... or... 333 00:24:28,220 --> 00:24:32,760 or... the way the... on the surface of the... 334 00:24:32,770 --> 00:24:36,764 Daniel. Why are you repeating your own lines? 335 00:24:36,774 --> 00:24:48,823 Am I? Yes. I... Oh, this stomach. God in heaven. 336 00:24:49,785 --> 00:24:55,740 Speaking my own lines? Well... isn't that rather the point? 337 00:24:55,750 --> 00:24:58,724 Isn't that what my script's about? Karaoke! 338 00:24:58,734 --> 00:25:00,600 As a metaphor, I mean. 339 00:25:00,700 --> 00:25:04,592 The music's written and performed by someone else 340 00:25:04,602 --> 00:25:08,503 and there's this pidding little space left 341 00:25:08,603 --> 00:25:11,992 for you to sing yourself, but only to their lyrics, 342 00:25:12,002 --> 00:25:14,621 their timing, it's a feeling that... 343 00:25:15,853 --> 00:25:19,439 Dan. Are you all right? 344 00:25:20,066 --> 00:25:26,697 The fee... The feeling that... 345 00:25:26,707 --> 00:25:34,474 what we hear... see... think that what is so... say out of there. In front of us... 346 00:25:34,474 --> 00:25:41,147 the way we feel it's somehow or other been arranged in advance by... by... 347 00:25:41,247 --> 00:25:46,057 Oh, I don't know how to call it... - Paranoia? 348 00:25:54,060 --> 00:25:59,261 I've always longed to be an artsy-fartsy arsehole, Anna, 349 00:25:59,271 --> 00:26:01,959 which is why I want to work for the Arts Council 350 00:26:02,059 --> 00:26:09,781 or that magazine, what is it? Sight and Sound. I'd make a... 351 00:26:18,812 --> 00:26:20,432 It's straight out of it... 352 00:26:21,569 --> 00:26:23,494 it's the second page of my... 353 00:26:24,807 --> 00:26:26,188 What's happening here? 354 00:26:26,288 --> 00:26:29,147 Just... look, hang about a sec. 355 00:26:29,157 --> 00:26:31,782 If you just hold your bleed'n horses a minute. 356 00:26:31,882 --> 00:26:33,512 I don't... 357 00:26:33,612 --> 00:26:36,674 `If you just hold your bleed'n horses a minute...' 358 00:26:36,774 --> 00:26:40,595 What? - Look... is this some sort of set-up... 359 00:26:40,695 --> 00:26:43,351 Are you lot trying out a joke on me, or what? 360 00:26:43,361 --> 00:26:45,606 Daniel? What on earth are you on about? 361 00:26:45,616 --> 00:26:47,676 They are speaking my lines. 362 00:26:47,686 --> 00:26:49,969 Now look, Sandra! - No! You look. 363 00:26:50,069 --> 00:26:53,663 I mean, it's not as though you haven't done it often enough before, now is it? 364 00:26:53,763 --> 00:26:56,755 I don't want to do it with him at all, thank you very bleed'n much. 365 00:26:56,855 --> 00:27:03,004 Christ, I mean... it's not as though you ain't done it often enough before, honey. 366 00:27:03,014 --> 00:27:06,996 What do you mean? - What I mean? Blimey. Wake up! 367 00:27:08,084 --> 00:27:11,929 You've had more blokes than I've had bleed'n... - Weetabix. 368 00:27:12,339 --> 00:27:15,029 I've never hardly ever never done it for the... No! Not for money! 369 00:27:15,129 --> 00:27:18,363 What do you think I am? 370 00:27:18,463 --> 00:27:20,914 I'd want a thousand on the table before I even... 371 00:27:21,014 --> 00:27:24,130 You've got a bloody cheek, Peter. Sod off! 372 00:27:24,230 --> 00:27:27,373 Hey. Hey. Watch that lip. 373 00:27:30,264 --> 00:27:32,183 I'm sorry, love... I... 374 00:27:33,572 --> 00:27:38,947 I thought for a minute there I thought that those two... over there... you see?... 375 00:27:42,483 --> 00:27:44,286 They are too far away, aren't they? 376 00:27:44,790 --> 00:27:46,597 Can you hear what they're saying? 377 00:27:47,133 --> 00:27:48,301 Anna? Can you? 378 00:27:48,737 --> 00:27:50,956 Your speech is gettig slurred. Do you know that? 379 00:27:50,966 --> 00:27:52,669 Anna! Can you hear what they're saying! 380 00:27:52,679 --> 00:27:55,935 Of course I can't. And why would I even want to, for heaven's sakes? 381 00:27:56,874 --> 00:28:00,890 Daniel. Please. Surely you've had enough. 382 00:28:02,173 --> 00:28:05,317 And it can't be doing that stomach of yours much good. 383 00:28:05,327 --> 00:28:07,626 Haven't they told you that, the doctors? 384 00:28:07,636 --> 00:28:09,799 Why don't you look at me when I am talking to you? 385 00:28:10,418 --> 00:28:13,497 What the hell's going on in that pretty little head? Eh? 386 00:28:14,365 --> 00:28:16,659 That guy. Keeps staring at me. 387 00:28:16,759 --> 00:28:19,862 What. Him? 388 00:28:21,024 --> 00:28:22,404 He's nothing. 389 00:28:22,504 --> 00:28:24,909 And you should be used to all that by now. 390 00:28:24,919 --> 00:28:28,721 You're something you are, Sandra. Real special. 391 00:28:28,731 --> 00:28:31,743 No, all the time... eyes sticking out of his head. 392 00:28:31,965 --> 00:28:35,722 So long as he's not from your actual Customs and Excise... 393 00:28:36,526 --> 00:28:40,038 Nah. Nah. Looks to intelligent. 394 00:28:40,138 --> 00:28:44,312 You'd think I was in the bleed'n Top Shop window or something. 395 00:28:44,322 --> 00:28:47,982 I've had enough of this! - Hey! None of that! 396 00:28:49,340 --> 00:28:52,243 You dragged up in a pigsty or what? 397 00:28:52,343 --> 00:28:54,678 I'll assume service is included? 398 00:28:54,778 --> 00:28:57,138 Oh, but... but... Anna. That was my invite... 399 00:28:57,148 --> 00:29:00,262 You're not here, Daniel. You're off on some other planet. 400 00:29:00,272 --> 00:29:03,105 The one you can only see through the bottom of a bottle. 401 00:29:03,515 --> 00:29:06,582 Come on! Eh? Get yourself home and sleep it off. 402 00:29:06,592 --> 00:29:09,765 You're due in the cutting room tomorrow, and I'd like your head clear. 403 00:29:09,775 --> 00:29:11,804 Yeah. To assess the mess. 404 00:29:11,904 --> 00:29:12,549 What mess? 405 00:29:12,559 --> 00:29:13,666 Hah? - No. What mess? 406 00:29:13,676 --> 00:29:15,625 Thank you ver' much. I hope you enjoy. 407 00:29:15,635 --> 00:29:17,604 Come again please. 408 00:29:19,228 --> 00:29:23,442 We all know what Nick's like... but I think he's done a pretty good job on your script, Daniel. 409 00:29:23,452 --> 00:29:25,518 He's too arrogant! It's that twit-twit bray! 410 00:29:25,528 --> 00:29:27,626 That uppah uppah class thing, 411 00:29:27,627 --> 00:29:30,378 cousin-or-something of the Queen thing. 412 00:29:30,388 --> 00:29:33,912 A trenchful of blue shite. - Must go, Daniel. 413 00:29:33,922 --> 00:29:36,895 It's my work, my sweat, he's fucking up! 414 00:29:36,995 --> 00:29:40,350 I'm not going to be knocked down by his bloody Rolls Royce! 415 00:29:40,450 --> 00:29:42,055 There's a long way to go yet. 416 00:29:42,155 --> 00:29:44,932 Lots of things happen in the cutting room, as you well know. 417 00:29:45,255 --> 00:29:47,100 You didn't bother to come on location once, 418 00:29:47,110 --> 00:29:50,920 and you've only seen a few rushes on casette, so why don't you wait and... 419 00:29:52,994 --> 00:29:55,076 And anyway you don't mean half of this. 420 00:29:55,086 --> 00:29:57,015 You 're drunk, Dan. It's gibberish. 421 00:29:57,025 --> 00:29:59,380 It's more tiredness than the... 422 00:29:59,390 --> 00:30:03,855 And deep disappointment, I'm sorry to say... 423 00:30:03,955 --> 00:30:06,609 deep, deep disapp... 424 00:30:06,619 --> 00:30:08,293 ...Aeh... Hang on! 425 00:30:08,862 --> 00:30:12,448 Anna! Anna! 426 00:30:19,464 --> 00:30:21,555 Anna! 427 00:30:23,692 --> 00:30:27,594 That girl in my Karaoke... God. She has such a horrible death, doesn't she? 428 00:30:27,604 --> 00:30:31,547 Will I see any of that in the cutting room tomorrow? The killing? 429 00:30:31,557 --> 00:30:33,706 We're still on the first reel. Of course not. 430 00:30:33,716 --> 00:30:36,592 The poor girl. It's such a horrible way to die. 431 00:30:39,020 --> 00:30:41,538 Why can you never get a taxi when it's raining? 432 00:30:41,548 --> 00:30:43,691 Oh, but you can if you've got an umbrella... 433 00:30:43,701 --> 00:30:46,791 Rucking fain, as Ben'd say... 434 00:30:46,801 --> 00:30:49,342 Half a mo'... didn't I have an umbrella? 435 00:30:49,442 --> 00:30:51,354 When `why must I be a teen... 436 00:30:51,454 --> 00:30:55,846 Oh, no. That was the old man in my... um... my... 437 00:30:59,118 --> 00:31:00,689 Here's one! 438 00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:05,281 Do you want a lift... ? Daniel? 439 00:31:13,278 --> 00:31:15,339 No. Don't go! 440 00:31:15,900 --> 00:31:18,947 Anna! Wait! Wait... ! 441 00:31:22,140 --> 00:31:25,603 Shall I stop? - No, thank you. Not on your bloody life! 442 00:31:26,817 --> 00:31:29,634 And there is this guy... `Listen,' he says. 443 00:31:29,734 --> 00:31:32,474 `He's got one hell of a serious condition. Fatal!' 444 00:31:32,574 --> 00:31:37,840 And I am thinking, God, no, do you mean Aids or the big C or... 445 00:31:37,850 --> 00:31:40,845 Worse, ' he said. `He's undercapitalized!' 446 00:31:54,903 --> 00:31:58,598 He should press his conk up against a drug store window. 447 00:32:18,185 --> 00:32:24,577 `And then the groteskly patterned tie comes over his head and around her throat. 448 00:32:25,147 --> 00:32:31,199 She thinks at first that it is some other kind of game in the manner she had come to expect from him. 449 00:32:32,247 --> 00:32:35,296 But then the choking begins' 450 00:32:43,253 --> 00:32:46,695 My God. There's some bloody lunatics about, Mr Balmer. 451 00:32:46,795 --> 00:32:49,831 You don't know how exactly right you are, for once. 452 00:32:49,931 --> 00:32:53,585 Sorry? - Well, it so happens that that particular lunatic was My Writer. 453 00:32:53,685 --> 00:32:57,481 I would have given you a bonus if you'd flattened the cocky little bugger... 454 00:32:57,581 --> 00:33:01,418 And I've doubled it had you reversed back over whatever was left of him! 455 00:33:01,428 --> 00:33:03,992 Squishy guts. A great sound. 456 00:33:04,566 --> 00:33:07,228 Sounds good to me. Will I get another go at it, sir? 457 00:33:07,328 --> 00:33:08,864 I'll make sure you do, Tom. 458 00:33:13,331 --> 00:33:14,256 Come on. 459 00:33:14,899 --> 00:33:15,748 Come on. 460 00:33:16,894 --> 00:33:18,741 It's only a story. 461 00:33:22,203 --> 00:33:23,522 A... story. 462 00:33:38,415 --> 00:33:41,456 I know this is the second time I've changed my mind... 463 00:33:41,477 --> 00:33:43,040 Don't matter a bit to me, miss. 464 00:33:43,058 --> 00:33:46,261 B'if you could wait here. I shouldn't be longer than fifteen minutes at the most. 465 00:33:46,287 --> 00:33:49,464 As long as you like, love. - And then take me to where I first said, Muswell Hill. 466 00:33:49,493 --> 00:33:52,612 Couldn't be better. That's my neck of the woods, and then I'm done. - Okay. 467 00:34:08,145 --> 00:34:10,423 � When tears dum dee. 468 00:34:11,354 --> 00:34:13,516 � Like ralling fain. 469 00:34:14,838 --> 00:34:16,735 � You'll dum dee dum. 470 00:34:19,308 --> 00:34:21,404 � And tall my came... ! 471 00:34:24,032 --> 00:34:25,672 No! 472 00:34:26,112 --> 00:34:29,602 He'll be very, very cross with me, my dear. 473 00:34:29,640 --> 00:34:32,640 I shall be made to go to bed early. 474 00:34:32,989 --> 00:34:35,989 Oh, but I'm sure... 475 00:34:36,670 --> 00:34:39,350 Mother! No! What have I always said? 476 00:34:39,410 --> 00:34:40,825 Mother! How could... 477 00:34:41,816 --> 00:34:45,872 Anna! You really, really... - She's a nice girl, Ben. 478 00:34:45,905 --> 00:34:49,555 Bo to ged! - I'm going. I'm going. 479 00:34:50,627 --> 00:34:53,381 A nice girl. Nice, nice girl. 480 00:34:57,467 --> 00:35:02,394 That's what you should be thinking of, Ben! Ben... ! 481 00:35:07,260 --> 00:35:11,385 Oh dear. I... - This is my leasure hour. 482 00:35:11,406 --> 00:35:14,775 My private time. - Yes, I'm... 483 00:35:14,802 --> 00:35:23,574 Oh, God. I'm sorry to barge in on you like this, but I've just been with your client Daniel Feeld, and I... 484 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:31,390 My, my nephew... what! Ah! My youngest sister's youngest boy. 485 00:35:31,431 --> 00:35:34,997 She won't let him... so I... well... during the day, you know... 486 00:35:35,023 --> 00:35:39,256 I'm out, after all... So I... - But isn't it wonderful. 487 00:35:40,111 --> 00:35:42,013 Is it? 488 00:35:42,023 --> 00:35:47,351 The boy must be a genius, it's so... 489 00:35:48,545 --> 00:35:53,606 Really, Ben. This is something I am very glad to have seen. 490 00:35:53,614 --> 00:35:57,324 I thought all these sort of things, all those sort of skills had... 491 00:35:57,335 --> 00:36:00,769 gone with the wind! - Well. Yes. I know what you... 492 00:36:02,797 --> 00:36:07,758 I must admit I'm sometimes tempted to hend a land on it myself... 493 00:36:08,156 --> 00:36:13,533 Pardon? - Lend a hand! Lend a hand! 494 00:36:13,552 --> 00:36:16,480 You know I have this pittle troblem know and then? 495 00:36:16,522 --> 00:36:19,284 Usually when agitated. - I... 496 00:36:19,758 --> 00:36:26,909 Yes, Ben. But everyone thinks it's rather endearing, if you'll forgive me saying so. 497 00:36:26,935 --> 00:36:33,650 I... and I'm truly sorry to have caused you any... um... agitation by baring in like this... 498 00:36:33,805 --> 00:36:39,979 She's been fine up until about eighteen months ago, my dear old Ma... 499 00:36:39,995 --> 00:36:44,366 Eighty-seven years old. Been all around the world in all sorts of conditions, 500 00:36:44,431 --> 00:36:49,051 and never once been in hospital. My Father was a colonel, y'see. 501 00:36:49,112 --> 00:36:53,493 Army. No... fit as a fiddle, old Ma. 502 00:36:53,613 --> 00:36:56,703 Didn't even go into hospital when I came along. 503 00:36:56,740 --> 00:36:59,740 I was born on the lack of a borry. Uh... 504 00:36:59,879 --> 00:37:05,278 But nowadays, I'm afraid, the old head has sort of packed in a bit. 505 00:37:05,335 --> 00:37:08,740 Well, there you are, there you are. 506 00:37:09,231 --> 00:37:12,746 What did you want to see me about, Anna? 507 00:37:12,756 --> 00:37:15,495 Kucking Faraoke, I suppose. 508 00:37:33,482 --> 00:37:35,780 It was only drizzling when we came into that dump. 509 00:37:35,813 --> 00:37:37,608 Now look at it! Pissing down. 510 00:37:37,647 --> 00:37:40,014 You got a real nice way of putting things, I'll give that. 511 00:37:40,054 --> 00:37:43,104 Up you. - I mean, a bloke could take you anywhere. 512 00:37:43,136 --> 00:37:45,175 Well, my hair will get soacked. 513 00:37:45,184 --> 00:37:48,619 Moan, moan. Christ, you've only got to walk a few yards. 514 00:37:48,675 --> 00:37:52,109 You haven't got enough up top to worry about, haveya? Outside or in. 515 00:37:52,139 --> 00:37:53,666 Hey! - Well it's right. 516 00:37:53,677 --> 00:37:56,540 Here. Have my bloody coat, willya! 517 00:37:56,580 --> 00:37:59,539 Put it over your head and shut up. - Ta. 518 00:38:08,464 --> 00:38:12,346 ... and I was just so worried. He's obviously not very well, 519 00:38:12,356 --> 00:38:16,442 and there's going to be such a terrible blow-up when he finally does come to the cutting room. 520 00:38:16,671 --> 00:38:18,374 I dread it. 521 00:38:18,405 --> 00:38:20,905 And I think it's going to threaten the show, Ben. Really. 522 00:38:20,931 --> 00:38:24,523 Nick Balmer is not my client, thank God... 523 00:38:25,017 --> 00:38:27,876 but I've had previous dealings, my girl, 524 00:38:27,902 --> 00:38:31,586 and he can be a very, very pifficut derson. 525 00:38:31,596 --> 00:38:35,915 Dear old Dan, whom I dearly love, in case you doubt it... 526 00:38:36,175 --> 00:38:39,265 well, he's only half of your problem, if that. 527 00:38:39,440 --> 00:38:41,904 You'll have to be the boxing referee 528 00:38:41,915 --> 00:38:45,815 who gets a right hook from one and an upper-cut from t'other. 529 00:38:45,872 --> 00:38:50,543 Be strong. And wear metal underwear, eh? 530 00:38:51,494 --> 00:38:58,091 The trouble is, I'm not in a very strong position on this project, to be absolutely honest. 531 00:38:58,109 --> 00:39:02,628 Yes. I know that, my dear. Very awkward for you. 532 00:39:02,645 --> 00:39:05,782 It's not easy to step up from being a line producer... 533 00:39:05,800 --> 00:39:10,116 You see, Nick has invested nearly three-quarters of a million pounds of his own loot in the film. 534 00:39:10,158 --> 00:39:13,567 He owns the script... - With certain contractual restraints. 535 00:39:13,577 --> 00:39:15,234 Of course. But what I'm saying is... 536 00:39:15,267 --> 00:39:18,719 What you're saying is that Nick Balmer is appointed you 537 00:39:18,745 --> 00:39:21,530 and make damned sure that in the last resort you... 538 00:39:21,548 --> 00:39:23,618 do... what... he... wants. 539 00:39:23,662 --> 00:39:25,971 He who fays the piddler. - Oh, 540 00:39:28,179 --> 00:39:33,836 Yes. You're dead right, of course. 541 00:39:34,484 --> 00:39:36,936 I may well have to resign... 542 00:39:37,036 --> 00:39:43,235 throw it all up. Walk off into what won't be a sunset. 543 00:39:43,245 --> 00:39:48,418 No, no, no. Hang on in there. Do what you can. Come on. 544 00:39:48,428 --> 00:39:50,924 You know this business almost as well as I do. 545 00:39:50,924 --> 00:39:52,827 It's as tightly packed as a bolf gall 546 00:39:52,860 --> 00:39:57,179 with idiots, charlatans, strutting egoists, flundering bools! 547 00:39:57,217 --> 00:40:02,966 So. - So? - So... you'll meet him? Yeah? 548 00:40:03,093 --> 00:40:06,141 At least meet him. Wontcha! 549 00:40:06,973 --> 00:40:12,192 And it's a real nice hotel, love. Sandra! - What? 550 00:40:12,209 --> 00:40:16,614 You're a bitch! A real bitch! - But what do I get out of it? You tell me that? 551 00:40:16,637 --> 00:40:19,993 It's not what you get, Angel. It's what you don't get! 552 00:40:19,992 --> 00:40:24,558 Whatchewmean? - You don't get that clip round the ear'ole for a start, my girl. 553 00:40:24,795 --> 00:40:29,515 And you won't be needing no work off of no plastic surgeon, willya? 554 00:40:29,528 --> 00:40:33,481 Got to save her, I've got to... rewrite, 555 00:40:33,501 --> 00:40:38,722 or... or... New lines! 556 00:41:06,223 --> 00:41:09,733 No. I've got my own reason for working here. And it's a very special one. 557 00:41:09,775 --> 00:41:12,343 What is it then? Come on? What? - Never you mind! 558 00:41:12,894 --> 00:41:16,532 I know what goes on in there. God Almighty! 559 00:41:16,557 --> 00:41:19,628 You know damned well it's just a posh sort of knocking-shop! 560 00:41:19,654 --> 00:41:22,968 Ha! That's what you think! You got no bloody idea at all! 561 00:41:23,816 --> 00:41:25,248 Bastard. 562 00:41:25,484 --> 00:41:27,871 You shit! 563 00:41:46,179 --> 00:41:52,240 � How much is that doggie in the window? Arf, arf 564 00:41:52,266 --> 00:41:57,314 � The one with the waggly tail 565 00:41:57,320 --> 00:42:03,027 � How much is that doggie in the window? Arf, arf 566 00:42:03,052 --> 00:42:05,503 � I do'hope that doggie's for sale 567 00:42:08,365 --> 00:42:13,317 � I must take a trip to California 568 00:42:13,977 --> 00:42:19,536 � And leave my poor sweetheart alone 569 00:42:19,871 --> 00:42:24,941 � If he has a dog he won't be lonely 570 00:42:25,025 --> 00:42:29,117 � And the doggie will have a good home 571 00:42:30,715 --> 00:42:32,459 Happy ending! 572 00:42:32,536 --> 00:42:40,331 Happy ending! Must... write... a happy ending! 573 00:42:40,593 --> 00:42:44,586 Got to help her! Got to save her! 574 00:42:44,741 --> 00:42:47,760 � In the window? Arf, arf 575 00:42:47,825 --> 00:42:52,233 � I do'hope that doggie's for sale 576 00:42:53,426 --> 00:42:57,956 � How much is that doggie in the window? 577 00:42:57,970 --> 00:43:02,342 Well, hi! It's still raining then! 578 00:43:02,419 --> 00:43:07,440 How's about a nice dry champagne? - Um. Well, OK. Yes. 579 00:43:07,547 --> 00:43:10,564 Would you like it brought over to one of the alcoves over there? 580 00:43:10,575 --> 00:43:13,221 It's much more comfy and one of the young ladies... - No. 581 00:43:13,252 --> 00:43:17,155 No? Oh, but you'll be so much... - I'll just stand here, thanks. 582 00:43:17,434 --> 00:43:19,607 I'm not going to stay very long. 583 00:43:19,637 --> 00:43:24,309 I presume I'm allowed to do that. And I'm very fond of dogs. 584 00:43:24,339 --> 00:43:27,759 You can do what you like. That's the whole point darling. 585 00:43:28,007 --> 00:43:31,046 So, just relax, OK? 586 00:43:31,080 --> 00:43:36,238 Thanks. I'll just crack my knuckles in rythm, from time to time. 587 00:43:46,338 --> 00:43:49,790 They all somehow sort of look the bloody same, don't they? 588 00:43:49,815 --> 00:43:53,326 Yeah. Scumbags. - It's wet... 589 00:43:53,520 --> 00:43:56,053 might not be many in, that's the trouble. 590 00:43:57,052 --> 00:43:59,405 And he looks too pissed to try a poke. 591 00:44:09,431 --> 00:44:15,122 Hi! My name is Angie. I was looking at you... - No. 592 00:44:18,181 --> 00:44:23,261 Hi, I'm Angie. I was looking at you when you came in and I fought, he's... 593 00:44:23,334 --> 00:44:26,421 Who? - Sorry? 594 00:44:26,861 --> 00:44:28,166 Who did you fight? 595 00:44:31,110 --> 00:44:34,544 What are you laughing at, then? - I've used that line before. 596 00:44:35,083 --> 00:44:37,031 Pardon? - But so have you... 597 00:44:37,069 --> 00:44:39,700 Look... I'm only trying to be... - Go away. 598 00:44:40,433 --> 00:44:41,418 What... ? 599 00:44:41,454 --> 00:44:45,991 No. Please. I know you're only doing your... 600 00:44:46,029 --> 00:44:48,361 but... I've got this... this... 601 00:44:48,769 --> 00:44:52,124 Don't know whether my head's in my belly or my belly's in my head. 602 00:44:52,149 --> 00:44:53,780 They're both a fucking mess. 603 00:44:53,809 --> 00:44:55,696 Christ. 604 00:44:56,234 --> 00:45:01,444 So if you'll leave me be. 605 00:45:01,474 --> 00:45:03,841 Oh, all right then. Cheers. 606 00:45:07,758 --> 00:45:11,392 Perhaps you'd rather have a nice little chat with one of the others... 607 00:45:12,667 --> 00:45:16,282 No. I only came in... 608 00:45:21,264 --> 00:45:27,268 Lovely. Isn't she. I... Yes. Yes she is. Very lovely. 609 00:45:28,510 --> 00:45:30,465 Even in that garb. 610 00:45:37,763 --> 00:45:41,170 ... and with a face like a fucking bent fiddle! 611 00:45:41,196 --> 00:45:44,286 I'm sorry, Mr Mailion, but I just had this row with my boyfriend as was and... 612 00:45:44,296 --> 00:45:49,780 I don't give a pint of horse piss for your private life, my gal. 613 00:45:49,789 --> 00:45:51,903 This is where you get paid 614 00:45:51,921 --> 00:45:56,550 this is where you should bring your pretty little arse on time 615 00:45:56,565 --> 00:45:58,546 and this is where 616 00:45:59,453 --> 00:46:07,239 you-should-crack-your-fucking-fizzog- in-a-fucking-smile. Right? 617 00:46:08,267 --> 00:46:09,341 Right. 618 00:46:10,210 --> 00:46:12,158 Excuse me, Mr Mailion. 619 00:46:12,332 --> 00:46:14,818 But the gentleman down there at the other end of the bar 620 00:46:15,005 --> 00:46:16,816 would like to have a drink with Sandra. 621 00:46:19,886 --> 00:46:21,943 What? 622 00:46:23,743 --> 00:46:26,610 Dom fucking Perignon, right? 623 00:46:45,779 --> 00:46:47,739 Such a horrible way to... 624 00:46:52,453 --> 00:46:55,812 Hi! I was looking at you when you came in and I fought... 625 00:46:55,845 --> 00:46:59,288 You fought? - Beg pardon? 626 00:46:59,321 --> 00:47:02,000 These lines keep cropping up. The same lines... 627 00:47:02,007 --> 00:47:06,029 I mean... you'd... like a drink? Please? 628 00:47:06,477 --> 00:47:09,831 Well, thanks very much... yeah! ... But, hey, why don't we have a bottle? 629 00:47:09,841 --> 00:47:12,696 Certainly. - Dom Perignon. 630 00:47:12,717 --> 00:47:15,370 Ab-so-lutely. The best for the best. 631 00:47:20,383 --> 00:47:23,547 You where staring at me, weren't you? In that caf� place. 632 00:47:23,612 --> 00:47:28,004 I... Yes. - And you followed me in here, didn'tya? 633 00:47:28,061 --> 00:47:31,958 Yes. I did. - What you want? What you playing at? 634 00:47:31,979 --> 00:47:34,782 Please. What is your name? - Sandra. 635 00:47:36,123 --> 00:47:37,481 What's the matter? 636 00:47:38,979 --> 00:47:41,656 And the man you where with, he was called Peter, wasn't he? 637 00:47:41,717 --> 00:47:45,608 Yeah. But what's that got to do with you? You know him or what? 638 00:47:51,111 --> 00:47:55,853 I... I'm a writer. I put words into people's mouths. 639 00:47:55,886 --> 00:48:02,047 And at the moment, I... oh, God! My stomach! 640 00:48:03,479 --> 00:48:05,818 It's all coming true in front of me. 641 00:48:05,844 --> 00:48:10,705 So listen. I said I put words into people's mouths. Well, I also... 642 00:48:10,747 --> 00:48:13,251 Are you getting any of this? Can you understand at all? 643 00:48:13,268 --> 00:48:15,969 Hey! Steady on, Romeo. - It's not just marks on a page. 644 00:48:15,987 --> 00:48:20,812 It's not just words in other people's mouths. I make them do things. 645 00:48:20,853 --> 00:48:25,975 I even let them screw each other or lie to each other or 646 00:48:26,020 --> 00:48:29,288 or or or kill each other... 647 00:48:29,318 --> 00:48:32,750 Yes! Kill! Kill! - Hey! Somebody! Quick! 648 00:48:32,775 --> 00:48:38,496 And you... it's you, Sandra! They're going to kill you... 649 00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:41,901 Somebody! 650 00:48:43,789 --> 00:48:49,243 Help, somebody! Help... 651 00:48:49,284 --> 00:48:51,670 'Ere! You can't do that in my place! 652 00:48:52,616 --> 00:48:58,320 Why must I be a teenager in love 653 00:49:08,343 --> 00:49:12,024 Subtitles edited by CINEMAAS.54107

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