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1
00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:23,346
Hmm... bag feels
a little light, Dad.
2
00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:25,221
- Chips!
- Chips!
3
00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:34,800
Chocolate chips.
4
00:00:34,835 --> 00:00:37,702
It's good to be men.
5
00:00:37,738 --> 00:00:40,332
Better to be living men.
6
00:00:40,374 --> 00:00:42,433
Come on, Mom. Manly food.
7
00:00:42,476 --> 00:00:45,070
Come on, Cor. Momly food.
8
00:00:45,112 --> 00:00:47,910
Humor her.
She washes your underwear.
9
00:00:47,948 --> 00:00:50,075
Aren't you going
to cut these sandwiches?
10
00:00:50,117 --> 00:00:51,516
No, no. When men eat...
11
00:00:51,552 --> 00:00:53,747
they like to feel a fistful
of bread and meat...
12
00:00:53,787 --> 00:00:56,255
not some crustless
little triangle.
13
00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:58,485
Yeah, Mom. Last time
you made us sandwiches...
14
00:00:58,525 --> 00:01:00,493
all the truckers
that passed us laughed...
15
00:01:00,527 --> 00:01:03,052
and thought
we were major nozzles.
16
00:01:03,096 --> 00:01:05,064
I want to go see
the Blue Angels.
17
00:01:05,098 --> 00:01:07,623
These aren't angels
from heaven, Morgan.
18
00:01:07,668 --> 00:01:09,363
Yeah, these angels
are from the Navy.
19
00:01:09,403 --> 00:01:11,371
Me and Dad are gonna
watch 'em do formations.
20
00:01:11,405 --> 00:01:14,272
- I want to go with you.
- Ya do?
21
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:15,570
Cory.
22
00:01:15,609 --> 00:01:17,873
Dad. You know
she can't sit still.
23
00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:21,904
You know she's got an attention
span of, like, two seconds.
24
00:01:21,949 --> 00:01:23,382
Morgan?
25
00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:26,351
I got it.
26
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:31,021
Heather, I'm sorry.
Look, you wear a turtleneck...
27
00:01:31,058 --> 00:01:32,821
no one's even gonna notice.
28
00:01:34,962 --> 00:01:37,760
OK. I sucked a neck.
29
00:01:43,437 --> 00:01:45,405
Mrs. Matthews,
Leonard Spinelli.
30
00:01:45,439 --> 00:01:47,498
I'm Mr. Matthews'
assistant manager.
31
00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:49,236
Lenny, I know who you are.
32
00:01:49,276 --> 00:01:51,574
You've had dinner here
maybe twenty times.
33
00:01:51,612 --> 00:01:53,409
Oh, well, I'm just never sure...
34
00:01:53,447 --> 00:01:55,472
if I really make
an impression on people.
35
00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:57,983
Yeah, you do.
36
00:01:58,018 --> 00:02:00,350
I tried phoning, repeatedly.
37
00:02:00,387 --> 00:02:02,878
Did you know call waiting
is only pennies a day?
38
00:02:04,491 --> 00:02:06,152
Lenny alert.
39
00:02:06,193 --> 00:02:08,161
Mr. Matthews,
I'm very sorry...
40
00:02:08,195 --> 00:02:10,425
to disturb you at home,
especially on a Sunday.
41
00:02:10,464 --> 00:02:13,058
Especially when you're
spending time with your family.
42
00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:14,226
Leonard Spinelli.
43
00:02:15,402 --> 00:02:17,734
Lenny, I know who you are.
44
00:02:17,771 --> 00:02:19,739
Oh, really? Because
I'm never really sure if...
45
00:02:19,773 --> 00:02:20,967
Yeah.
46
00:02:21,008 --> 00:02:22,441
You do.
47
00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:24,535
Lenny, you came here.
48
00:02:24,578 --> 00:02:26,341
I assume there's a point.
49
00:02:26,380 --> 00:02:29,349
Right. Mr. Matthews,
if we move quickly...
50
00:02:29,383 --> 00:02:32,352
I think we can contain
this thing.
51
00:02:32,386 --> 00:02:34,547
Oh, the horror!
52
00:02:34,588 --> 00:02:36,488
Bottom line, Lenny.
53
00:02:36,523 --> 00:02:39,651
Right, right. oh, boy.
The bottom line is this.
54
00:02:39,693 --> 00:02:42,662
You know that long shelf
over the produce department...
55
00:02:42,696 --> 00:02:44,664
that holds all those
cases of Perrier?
56
00:02:44,698 --> 00:02:45,892
Yeah.
57
00:02:45,933 --> 00:02:48,731
- It doesn't do that anymore.
- It fell down?
58
00:02:48,769 --> 00:02:51,033
"Fell down"
would be one way of putting it.
59
00:02:51,071 --> 00:02:53,164
Another way would be
that the bottles crashed...
60
00:02:53,206 --> 00:02:55,800
through those produce bins
like they were eggshells...
61
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,867
and sent an imported
French tidal wave...
62
00:02:57,911 --> 00:02:59,742
all the way down aisle six.
63
00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:01,645
What's on aisle six?
64
00:03:01,682 --> 00:03:04,116
10,000 packages of Alka Seltzer.
65
00:03:05,118 --> 00:03:07,712
- Was anybody hurt?
- Hard to say.
66
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:10,314
Mr. Conklin was still fizzing
when I left.
67
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:13,326
- I got to go.
- Dad...
68
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:16,921
Cory, I got to go. I've got
an effervescent produce manager.
69
00:03:16,964 --> 00:03:18,693
Well, you got a warping son.
70
00:03:18,732 --> 00:03:20,859
I'm not spending enough
time with my dad.
71
00:03:20,901 --> 00:03:22,425
You step out of this house...
72
00:03:22,469 --> 00:03:24,733
I'm on my way
to my first ballet lesson.
73
00:03:24,771 --> 00:03:26,568
I'll promise you.
I'll make it up to you.
74
00:03:26,607 --> 00:03:29,235
Hey, I promise.
75
00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:37,440
Hey, Cory. Cory.
76
00:04:37,477 --> 00:04:39,240
Phillies are playing
on the west coast...
77
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:40,951
and Schilling's going
into the seventh inning...
78
00:04:40,981 --> 00:04:42,419
with a no-hitter
against the Dodgers.
79
00:04:42,449 --> 00:04:43,609
You too tired to come down...
80
00:04:43,650 --> 00:04:44,755
and watch the rest
of the game with me?
81
00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,253
What, are you new here?
82
00:04:48,822 --> 00:04:50,289
The Phillies got
a no-hitter going.
83
00:04:50,323 --> 00:04:52,587
Want to come down watch the game
with me and Cory?
84
00:04:52,626 --> 00:04:54,253
I can't. I'm...
85
00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,626
I'm naked,
and I'm taking a math test.
86
00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:10,769
Boy, you never
see this on a menu.
87
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:13,279
They don't know good.
88
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:16,612
Long fly ball.
89
00:05:16,650 --> 00:05:18,379
Could be the no-hitter.
90
00:05:18,418 --> 00:05:21,012
No! Dykstra pulls it back
over the wall.
91
00:05:25,592 --> 00:05:28,288
- I hear ya.
- Mmph!
92
00:05:34,301 --> 00:05:36,098
Thanks for waking me up, Dad.
93
00:05:36,136 --> 00:05:39,469
Hey, wouldn't be
this much fun without you.
94
00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:41,371
Uh, don't tell Mom.
95
00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:43,873
Mom's not in on this?
96
00:05:43,910 --> 00:05:46,606
No, no, no.
This is kind of a guy secret.
97
00:05:46,646 --> 00:05:49,911
Well, a father-son bonding.
98
00:05:52,352 --> 00:05:55,082
Your mother can never
find out about this.
99
00:05:58,125 --> 00:06:00,116
- Dad?
- Hmm?
100
00:06:00,160 --> 00:06:04,062
This was as good as watching
those navy planes any day.
101
00:06:10,337 --> 00:06:12,931
All right, class, time's up.
102
00:06:12,973 --> 00:06:16,534
Please pass your test papers
to the front of your rows.
103
00:06:16,576 --> 00:06:20,535
Mr. Minkus, this test didn't
require an essay answer...
104
00:06:20,580 --> 00:06:24,676
but how refreshing that you've
chosen to include one.
105
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:26,549
Ahem. Suck-up.
106
00:06:26,586 --> 00:06:27,780
Future plumber.
107
00:06:29,456 --> 00:06:31,890
Feels a C-minus short.
108
00:06:31,925 --> 00:06:33,586
Ah, yes.
109
00:06:34,628 --> 00:06:36,095
Here we are.
110
00:06:38,265 --> 00:06:40,233
Huh? Is the test over?
111
00:06:40,267 --> 00:06:41,598
How'd I do?
112
00:06:41,635 --> 00:06:44,297
- Looks like an "A."
- I got an "A"?
113
00:06:44,337 --> 00:06:46,567
No. "A" is the only answer
you put down...
114
00:06:46,606 --> 00:06:48,506
before you slipped
into the coma.
115
00:06:48,542 --> 00:06:50,772
So, what did I get?
116
00:06:50,811 --> 00:06:55,305
Well, you answered one question
out of forty, and got it wrong.
117
00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:57,680
So what grade do you think
I'm going to give you?
118
00:06:57,717 --> 00:07:02,677
Can it be found at the beginning
of the word "fajita"?
119
00:07:02,722 --> 00:07:04,587
Si. senor.
120
00:07:04,624 --> 00:07:07,684
Come on, Mr. Feeny.
I was up till after midnight.
121
00:07:07,727 --> 00:07:09,354
Oh, and what
earth-shattering event...
122
00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:11,091
kept you up
till that time of night?
123
00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:12,257
A no-hitter.
124
00:07:12,299 --> 00:07:14,426
You got to stay up
and watch the game?
125
00:07:14,467 --> 00:07:16,731
- With my dad.
- Cool.
126
00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:19,534
Ah, baseball. Silly me.
127
00:07:19,573 --> 00:07:21,097
I thought
you might've stayed up...
128
00:07:21,141 --> 00:07:23,371
for something frivolous,
like the announcement...
129
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:26,243
from Stockholm
of the Nobel Prizes.
130
00:07:26,279 --> 00:07:28,770
Biophysics...
Dr. Ira Soochek.
131
00:07:28,815 --> 00:07:31,215
Medicine... Dr. Lin Yi Pao.
132
00:07:31,251 --> 00:07:34,152
Economics...
Professor Narwhal Fowab.
133
00:07:34,187 --> 00:07:36,314
And I'm fresh as a daisy.
134
00:07:37,624 --> 00:07:40,115
- Teacher's pet.
- Fix a sink.
135
00:07:42,562 --> 00:07:44,894
- Hi, babe.
- Hi, Daddy.
136
00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:46,660
I think he was talking to me.
137
00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:48,600
Well, actually,
it was a generic "babe"...
138
00:07:48,635 --> 00:07:51,229
encompassing all of womanhood.
139
00:07:51,271 --> 00:07:53,569
Oh, don't I feel special?
140
00:07:53,607 --> 00:07:56,576
Dad. Dad! We blew it.
141
00:07:56,610 --> 00:07:58,148
Hey, I haven't seen you
since breakfast.
142
00:07:58,178 --> 00:07:59,616
Whatever it was,
you blew it yourself.
143
00:07:59,646 --> 00:08:02,809
I failed a test today
just because I fell asleep.
144
00:08:02,849 --> 00:08:06,046
I told Mr. Feeny you and I
were up past midnight...
145
00:08:06,086 --> 00:08:09,453
watching this incredible
no-hitter and...
146
00:08:11,057 --> 00:08:12,319
and then I realized...
147
00:08:12,359 --> 00:08:15,055
it was probably just
an intensely vivid dream.
148
00:08:19,065 --> 00:08:22,000
You kept him up that late
on a school night?
149
00:08:22,035 --> 00:08:23,593
Well, it may not have been me.
150
00:08:23,637 --> 00:08:25,161
I think I saw
some other father...
151
00:08:25,205 --> 00:08:26,968
slurking around out there
after midnight.
152
00:08:27,007 --> 00:08:29,976
Midnight on a school night?
What were you thinking?
153
00:08:30,010 --> 00:08:33,468
I was thinking that I don't
spend enough time with my son.
154
00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:37,210
I was thinking that I promised
to make it up to him.
155
00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:39,582
I was thinking I'd go have
a talk with Mr. Feeny.
156
00:08:39,619 --> 00:08:40,916
Thank you.
157
00:08:40,954 --> 00:08:43,479
I'll explain it to him, get him
to let Cory take a make-up test.
158
00:08:43,523 --> 00:08:44,785
Oh, I'm so glad.
159
00:08:44,824 --> 00:08:47,657
Because until you do,
you're grounded.
160
00:08:49,562 --> 00:08:52,861
Does that really work?
Can she ground you?
161
00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:56,568
In certain ways, yes.
162
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,509
All right, Dad.
The Dad-inator.
163
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:05,738
You're gonna crush Feeny
like a grape.
164
00:09:05,779 --> 00:09:08,145
- George.
- Alan.
165
00:09:08,181 --> 00:09:09,512
Mr. Feeny.
166
00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:10,948
Mr. Matthews.
167
00:09:10,984 --> 00:09:12,679
I'd Like to talk to you...
168
00:09:12,719 --> 00:09:14,209
about that test
my son failed today.
169
00:09:14,254 --> 00:09:16,154
Of course, Alan.
I'm always available...
170
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:19,283
to discuss a student's progress
or problems...
171
00:09:19,326 --> 00:09:20,691
with an interested parent.
172
00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:23,025
You see, it was my fault
he fell asleep in class.
173
00:09:23,063 --> 00:09:26,590
- I kept him up late last night.
- To watch a baseball game.
174
00:09:26,633 --> 00:09:28,931
A no-hitter!
A piece of Phillies' history.
175
00:09:28,969 --> 00:09:33,599
You know when the last one was?
May 23, 1991. Tommy Greene.
176
00:09:33,640 --> 00:09:37,041
And do you want to know
what happened June 21, 1964?
177
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:39,170
A perfect game. Jim Bunning.
178
00:09:39,212 --> 00:09:43,046
And what year did Magellan
circumnavigate the globe?
179
00:09:43,083 --> 00:09:45,449
Why would I fill my head
with that junk?
180
00:09:45,485 --> 00:09:49,148
Uh... George, I had made plans
with Cory yesterday...
181
00:09:49,189 --> 00:09:51,180
and something came up.
I had to cancel.
182
00:09:51,224 --> 00:09:53,530
I promised to make it up to him,
so I got him out of bed...
183
00:09:53,560 --> 00:09:56,495
last night for a little
father-son bonding.
184
00:09:56,529 --> 00:09:57,496
I see.
185
00:09:57,530 --> 00:10:00,499
So, can he take a make-up test
later this week?
186
00:10:00,533 --> 00:10:02,330
Cory may not take
a make-up test.
187
00:10:02,369 --> 00:10:04,098
The "F" stands.
188
00:10:05,372 --> 00:10:07,636
I thought you said
you understood.
189
00:10:07,674 --> 00:10:09,904
I believe I do understand, Alan.
190
00:10:09,943 --> 00:10:11,911
But understanding
and condoning...
191
00:10:11,945 --> 00:10:14,573
are two entirely
separate concepts.
192
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:17,879
So you're gonna fail a boy for
spending time with his father?
193
00:10:17,917 --> 00:10:20,181
In my 35 years of teaching...
194
00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:22,882
I have heard every
excuse imaginable...
195
00:10:22,922 --> 00:10:25,356
for why someone fails a test.
196
00:10:25,392 --> 00:10:28,884
What's my excuse
if somewhere down the line...
197
00:10:28,928 --> 00:10:30,555
a child fails at something...
198
00:10:30,597 --> 00:10:33,361
because I once abrogated
my responsibility...
199
00:10:33,400 --> 00:10:34,833
to impart knowledge?
200
00:10:38,571 --> 00:10:41,062
I've got to listen
to this every day.
201
00:10:42,342 --> 00:10:44,936
- House.
- Gone.
202
00:10:46,446 --> 00:10:47,845
Look, I don't understand...
203
00:10:47,881 --> 00:10:50,247
why you're making
a federal case out of this.
204
00:10:50,283 --> 00:10:51,580
Maybe if you were entrusted...
205
00:10:51,618 --> 00:10:55,213
with the education
of 32 sixth-graders every day...
206
00:10:55,255 --> 00:10:57,314
you would understand
what I'm talking about.
207
00:10:57,357 --> 00:10:59,291
And maybe if you had a son...
208
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,997
and were trying to find time
to spend with him...
209
00:11:01,027 --> 00:11:02,426
in between your job...
210
00:11:02,462 --> 00:11:04,430
and fixing the car,
and insulating the attic...
211
00:11:04,464 --> 00:11:06,364
you'd understand
what I'm talking about.
212
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:08,128
But you don't have
a son, George...
213
00:11:08,168 --> 00:11:10,295
so how could you understand?
214
00:11:11,938 --> 00:11:14,099
Well, we are obviously...
215
00:11:14,140 --> 00:11:16,938
on opposite sides
of the fence here.
216
00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:19,001
Yes, we are.
217
00:11:19,045 --> 00:11:21,605
Now, this conversation is over.
218
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:28,146
Aw, Dad. You got Feened.
219
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,550
Ah, the conquering
heroes return.
220
00:11:34,594 --> 00:11:35,856
How did you do?
221
00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:40,630
It was a very
difficult conversation.
222
00:11:40,667 --> 00:11:42,498
'Cause Feeny's a butt.
223
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:44,935
Hey, you don't call
your teacher that.
224
00:11:44,971 --> 00:11:47,132
Good teachers are a rare
commodity in this world...
225
00:11:47,173 --> 00:11:49,334
and George Feeny
is a great teacher.
226
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:52,640
Why don't you go upstairs
and get some tennis clothes on.
227
00:11:52,679 --> 00:11:54,579
We'll go down to the "Y",
hit some balls.
228
00:11:54,614 --> 00:11:55,614
OK.
229
00:11:57,150 --> 00:11:59,550
Feeny's a butt.
230
00:11:59,586 --> 00:12:00,780
Alan.
231
00:12:00,820 --> 00:12:02,378
I know what you're going to say.
232
00:12:02,422 --> 00:12:03,480
No, you don't.
233
00:12:03,523 --> 00:12:05,184
Oh, yes I do.
You're gonna say...
234
00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:07,163
I'm a jerk for keeping
my kid up half the night...
235
00:12:07,193 --> 00:12:08,698
and then trying
to weasel his teacher...
236
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:10,787
into making an exception
to the rules.
237
00:12:10,830 --> 00:12:12,491
That's not what
I was going to say.
238
00:12:12,532 --> 00:12:14,159
OK, what were you going to say?
239
00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:15,758
Forks go on the left.
240
00:12:19,439 --> 00:12:22,408
- That's it?
- No.
241
00:12:22,442 --> 00:12:24,808
I know why you did
what you did...
242
00:12:24,844 --> 00:12:29,008
and I love you for wanting
to spend more time with Cory...
243
00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:31,642
but you can't just
jerk his life around...
244
00:12:31,684 --> 00:12:33,743
to... to let yourself
off the hook...
245
00:12:33,786 --> 00:12:35,515
when you don't
have time for him.
246
00:12:36,856 --> 00:12:38,847
I'LL get it!
247
00:12:40,860 --> 00:12:42,555
Mr. Matthews?
Leonard Spinelli.
248
00:12:42,595 --> 00:12:45,086
- I work for your father.
- I know that, Lenny.
249
00:12:45,131 --> 00:12:47,190
I see you at the store
every day.
250
00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:49,895
Look, you're
the assistant manager.
251
00:12:49,936 --> 00:12:52,461
I'm just a boxboy.
Why don't you call me Eric?
252
00:12:52,505 --> 00:12:54,996
That would make me
intensely uncomfortable.
253
00:12:55,041 --> 00:12:57,134
I blanch at the thought.
254
00:12:57,177 --> 00:12:59,015
Lenny, was there something
you had to tell my dad?
255
00:12:59,045 --> 00:13:00,910
Yes, there was.
Hence, I came here.
256
00:13:00,947 --> 00:13:02,915
He's right in there.
257
00:13:04,717 --> 00:13:06,241
Oh, God!
258
00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:10,021
Hello, Lenny.
259
00:13:10,056 --> 00:13:12,490
Mr. Matthews, I'm very sorry
to disturb you at home...
260
00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:14,152
especially after-hours.
261
00:13:14,194 --> 00:13:15,994
Especially when you're
giving mrs. Matthews...
262
00:13:16,029 --> 00:13:17,963
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
263
00:13:17,997 --> 00:13:21,728
- Why are you in my kitchen?
- There's a problem at the store.
264
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:23,633
Well, of course there's
a problem at the store.
265
00:13:23,670 --> 00:13:25,228
There's always
a problem at the store.
266
00:13:25,271 --> 00:13:27,068
That's why they hire a manager.
267
00:13:27,106 --> 00:13:30,667
Can you tell me why they hire
an assistant manager?
268
00:13:30,710 --> 00:13:34,703
To tell the manager when
there's a problem at the store?
269
00:13:34,747 --> 00:13:37,307
No. To assist the manager...
270
00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:40,217
by taking care of the problem
when he's not there.
271
00:13:40,253 --> 00:13:42,380
I had no idea.
272
00:13:42,422 --> 00:13:44,287
I apologize.
Forget I was here...
273
00:13:44,324 --> 00:13:46,485
because this is a problem
for the assistant manager.
274
00:13:46,526 --> 00:13:47,925
There is no problem for you.
275
00:13:47,961 --> 00:13:49,826
- Dad, you ready?
- Yes, I am.
276
00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,693
I'm ready to play
tennis with my son...
277
00:13:51,731 --> 00:13:52,959
and bring him home early...
278
00:13:52,999 --> 00:13:55,559
let him get a good night's rest,
send him off to school...
279
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:58,196
and watch those As
start rolling in.
280
00:13:58,238 --> 00:13:59,796
And I am going
back to the store...
281
00:13:59,839 --> 00:14:02,069
to make sure we never again
put the lighter fluid...
282
00:14:02,108 --> 00:14:04,576
next to the rotisserie chickens.
283
00:14:05,712 --> 00:14:07,339
Are we talking
about a fire, Lenny?
284
00:14:07,380 --> 00:14:09,507
Yeah, but there is
no problem for you.
285
00:14:09,549 --> 00:14:11,414
How much of the store is left?
286
00:14:11,451 --> 00:14:13,316
St...
287
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:14,786
Cory...
288
00:14:14,821 --> 00:14:16,789
Dad, it's oK,
and you don't have...
289
00:14:16,823 --> 00:14:18,484
to wake me up or anything later.
290
00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,185
We'll play tennis
some other time.
291
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:21,420
Is the fire out, Lenny?
292
00:14:21,461 --> 00:14:23,588
Oh, yeah. We contained
the actual flameage.
293
00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,188
Fine. Wait for me in the car.
294
00:14:25,231 --> 00:14:26,630
Yes, sir.
295
00:14:26,666 --> 00:14:28,429
Miss Matthews, Leonard Spinelli.
296
00:14:28,468 --> 00:14:30,095
I work for your father.
297
00:14:30,136 --> 00:14:32,604
Lenny, we've been through this.
298
00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:37,532
Cory, your mother
just said something to me...
299
00:14:37,577 --> 00:14:39,306
that made a lot of sense.
300
00:14:39,345 --> 00:14:41,370
Don't you hate
when she does that?
301
00:14:41,414 --> 00:14:43,507
Yes, I do.
302
00:14:43,549 --> 00:14:45,710
She pointed out to me
that I'm angry...
303
00:14:45,752 --> 00:14:48,050
at the wrong guy
about your test.
304
00:14:48,087 --> 00:14:49,918
Well, what other guy is there?
305
00:14:49,956 --> 00:14:51,856
Mr. Feeny's the one
who failed me.
306
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:54,223
No, I failed you.
I didn't do my job.
307
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:55,887
You're at the store all day.
308
00:14:55,928 --> 00:14:57,828
How could you say you're
not doing your job?
309
00:14:57,864 --> 00:15:00,196
I didn't do my job
as your father.
310
00:15:00,233 --> 00:15:01,257
What?
311
00:15:01,301 --> 00:15:02,768
Look, if it was up to me...
312
00:15:02,802 --> 00:15:04,362
you wouldn't have
to go to sleep at all.
313
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:05,608
You wouldn't have
to go to school...
314
00:15:05,638 --> 00:15:06,935
I wouldn't have to go to work...
315
00:15:06,973 --> 00:15:08,873
and we could just spend
all our time together.
316
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:10,967
And there's nothing
that I'd rather do.
317
00:15:11,010 --> 00:15:12,910
Then why don't we do that?
318
00:15:12,945 --> 00:15:14,242
I don't know.
319
00:15:14,280 --> 00:15:17,078
I guess the family's
gotten used to eating.
320
00:15:17,116 --> 00:15:18,674
Cory...
321
00:15:18,718 --> 00:15:22,484
I shouldn't have kept you up
late last night.
322
00:15:22,522 --> 00:15:25,320
Mr. Feeny is right.
323
00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:34,025
Uh-oh.
324
00:15:45,578 --> 00:15:46,840
Don't shoot, Mr. Feeny!
325
00:15:46,879 --> 00:15:48,608
I'm just getting my tennis ball!
326
00:15:48,648 --> 00:15:51,481
Good evening, Mr. Matthews.
327
00:15:51,517 --> 00:15:54,077
Care to join me for a drink?
328
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:56,748
Uh... sure.
329
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:02,552
Help yourself.
330
00:16:25,451 --> 00:16:28,113
Hey! This is apple juice!
331
00:16:28,154 --> 00:16:32,090
Oh, gee, I must've left it
in there too long.
332
00:16:32,125 --> 00:16:33,649
Nice, uh...
333
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:35,593
What do you call this thing?
334
00:16:35,628 --> 00:16:38,620
Hmm, a Christmas present
from my sister.
335
00:16:38,664 --> 00:16:40,598
She forgets that I only take...
336
00:16:40,633 --> 00:16:43,534
the occasional glass of claret
with dinner.
337
00:16:43,569 --> 00:16:47,061
So, how come you're sitting
outside in the dark?
338
00:16:47,106 --> 00:16:50,007
I was thinking about
when I was a boy...
339
00:16:50,042 --> 00:16:52,306
just a little younger
than you are.
340
00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:53,835
There was a war going on.
341
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:57,509
It's hard to picture you
as a boy.
342
00:16:57,550 --> 00:17:00,417
Did your parents
call you Mr. Feeny?
343
00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:04,653
I used to ask my mother...
344
00:17:04,690 --> 00:17:08,387
why I could only have butter on
my toast two mornings a week...
345
00:17:08,428 --> 00:17:10,988
and she said,
"Because of the war in Europe."
346
00:17:11,030 --> 00:17:13,658
And I wondered why there was
never enough candy...
347
00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:17,294
and she told me,
"Because of the war in Europe."
348
00:17:17,336 --> 00:17:19,964
oh, and I longed
for a pair of sneakers.
349
00:17:20,006 --> 00:17:21,803
But I couldn't have any.
350
00:17:21,841 --> 00:17:25,106
Those Europe guys stole 'em?
351
00:17:25,144 --> 00:17:29,672
No, no. The rubber had to be
diverted to the war effort.
352
00:17:29,715 --> 00:17:31,774
There was a version
of a sneaker available...
353
00:17:31,818 --> 00:17:34,651
but it was made
out of recycled tires...
354
00:17:34,687 --> 00:17:37,747
and left black marks
on the gym floor.
355
00:17:37,790 --> 00:17:39,849
Hey, you took gym?
356
00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:41,689
They made me.
357
00:17:43,029 --> 00:17:47,329
Anyway, I prayed every night
for an end to the war in Europe.
358
00:17:47,366 --> 00:17:50,699
Not from any altruistic desire
for world peace.
359
00:17:50,736 --> 00:17:56,038
Just a boy's selfish wish
for buttered toast and sneakers.
360
00:17:56,075 --> 00:18:00,876
Then I heard that Mr. Truman was
going on the radio that night...
361
00:18:00,913 --> 00:18:02,972
to announce the end of the war.
362
00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:05,176
And I went home
and asked my father...
363
00:18:05,218 --> 00:18:09,211
if I could stay up with him
to hear the president.
364
00:18:09,255 --> 00:18:11,155
Do you know what he said?
365
00:18:11,190 --> 00:18:13,021
I'm guessing it's
either yes or no...
366
00:18:13,059 --> 00:18:16,995
but we both know how well I do
on multiple choice.
367
00:18:18,130 --> 00:18:22,362
He said...
"Tomorrow's a school day.
368
00:18:22,401 --> 00:18:24,494
"I don't want you up with me."
369
00:18:24,537 --> 00:18:29,372
So you're saying your dad really
knew the value of education.
370
00:18:29,408 --> 00:18:31,740
No, I'm saying
my father didn't want me...
371
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:35,645
hanging around with him
and his drinking buddies.
372
00:18:35,681 --> 00:18:38,479
As a result,
the next day at school...
373
00:18:38,518 --> 00:18:42,511
I was rested and fresh
and ready to learn.
374
00:18:42,555 --> 00:18:44,819
I see your point, Mr. Feeny.
375
00:18:44,857 --> 00:18:47,849
No, I don't think
you really do, Cory.
376
00:18:47,894 --> 00:18:51,762
What do you suppose
I learned in school that day?
377
00:18:51,797 --> 00:18:55,062
I know this has got
to be a biggie...
378
00:18:55,101 --> 00:18:57,831
like the Magna Carta
or something.
379
00:18:57,870 --> 00:19:01,636
I have no idea
what you learned that day.
380
00:19:01,674 --> 00:19:03,608
Neither do I.
381
00:19:03,643 --> 00:19:05,736
You see, Mr. Matthews...
382
00:19:05,778 --> 00:19:08,941
education is not about
obscure facts...
383
00:19:08,981 --> 00:19:11,176
and little test scores.
384
00:19:11,217 --> 00:19:14,948
Education is about
the overall effect...
385
00:19:14,987 --> 00:19:17,683
of years of slow absorption...
386
00:19:17,723 --> 00:19:19,953
concepts, philosophies...
387
00:19:19,992 --> 00:19:22,984
approaches to problem-solving.
388
00:19:23,029 --> 00:19:28,865
The whole process is so grand
and all-encompassing...
389
00:19:28,901 --> 00:19:30,994
that it really can't
be threatened...
390
00:19:31,037 --> 00:19:34,495
by the occasional
late-night no-hitter.
391
00:19:36,742 --> 00:19:41,270
It is important that a boy
spend time with his father.
392
00:19:41,314 --> 00:19:43,578
But... how do you know that?
393
00:19:43,616 --> 00:19:45,709
Your dad didn't let you
stay up with him.
394
00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:48,242
That's precisely why I do know.
395
00:19:49,689 --> 00:19:50,781
Cory!
396
00:19:50,823 --> 00:19:52,256
Over here, Dad...
397
00:19:52,291 --> 00:19:54,054
having a drink with Mr. Feeny.
398
00:19:55,394 --> 00:19:58,192
It's just apple juice.
How's the store?
399
00:19:58,230 --> 00:19:59,663
Oh, the store is fine.
400
00:19:59,699 --> 00:20:01,758
Just a small grease fire
at the rotisserie.
401
00:20:01,801 --> 00:20:05,362
Tomorrow we'll run a special
on blackened chicken.
402
00:20:05,404 --> 00:20:07,395
- Alan.
- George.
403
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:09,465
Better come in, kiddo.
About time for bed.
404
00:20:09,508 --> 00:20:10,770
Sure, Dad.
405
00:20:10,810 --> 00:20:15,076
Um... are we ever gonna study
that European sneaker war?
406
00:20:15,114 --> 00:20:17,514
I think you'll
get to it sometime...
407
00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:19,609
in the course of your education.
408
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:22,621
Good, 'cause it sounded
really interesting.
409
00:20:22,655 --> 00:20:24,350
Oh, it was.
410
00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:26,984
Well, good night, Mr. Feeny.
411
00:20:27,026 --> 00:20:28,823
Good night, Mr. Matthews.
412
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:35,994
Ahem. I, uh...
413
00:20:36,035 --> 00:20:38,469
just want you to know
I'm gonna have him in bed...
414
00:20:38,504 --> 00:20:41,268
every night
when he's supposed to be.
415
00:20:41,307 --> 00:20:45,004
Well, I want you to know
that if I did have a son...
416
00:20:45,044 --> 00:20:47,604
and the opportunity
presented itself...
417
00:20:47,647 --> 00:20:50,548
to wake him up
to watch a baseball game...
418
00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:54,952
or to listen to the president
on the radio...
419
00:20:54,987 --> 00:20:58,423
or for absolutely
no reason at all...
420
00:21:01,160 --> 00:21:02,422
Well...
421
00:21:02,461 --> 00:21:03,985
good night, Alan.
422
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:09,558
Good night, George.
423
00:21:13,472 --> 00:21:15,463
Night, Cor. Have good dreams.
424
00:21:15,508 --> 00:21:16,998
You, too.
425
00:21:17,043 --> 00:21:18,510
Hey, Mom?
426
00:21:18,544 --> 00:21:20,068
Hey, Cor?
427
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:22,876
- Can I ask you something?
- Sure.
428
00:21:22,915 --> 00:21:26,146
I'm on the clock
for another half hour.
429
00:21:26,185 --> 00:21:28,779
Um... well, earlier tonight...
430
00:21:28,821 --> 00:21:30,721
Dad told me
Mr. Feeny was right.
431
00:21:30,756 --> 00:21:34,089
And then later on,
Mr. Feeny told me Dad was right.
432
00:21:34,126 --> 00:21:36,219
At least that's what
I think he was saying.
433
00:21:36,262 --> 00:21:38,134
Sometimes I can't
hold my breathe long enough...
434
00:21:38,164 --> 00:21:41,361
to get down to where
Mr. Feeny likes to swim.
435
00:21:42,668 --> 00:21:44,533
Well, Cor,
sometimes two adults...
436
00:21:44,570 --> 00:21:46,868
can think two different ways
about something...
437
00:21:46,906 --> 00:21:48,533
and both can be right.
438
00:21:48,574 --> 00:21:51,134
Then, how come I only think
one way about things...
439
00:21:51,177 --> 00:21:52,508
and I'm always wrong?
440
00:21:52,545 --> 00:21:54,604
Good night, Cory.
See you tomorrow.
441
00:21:54,647 --> 00:21:55,978
What do you mean, tomorrow?
442
00:21:56,015 --> 00:21:57,846
The Phillies
are still in Los Angeles.
443
00:21:57,883 --> 00:21:59,441
What if there's
a no-hitter going?
444
00:21:59,485 --> 00:22:01,476
What if the president
goes on the radio?
445
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:04,455
Whatever goes on
can wait till tomorrow.
446
00:22:04,490 --> 00:22:05,787
How come?
447
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:09,261
Because your father
is always gonna be there...
448
00:22:09,295 --> 00:22:11,923
in the morning
to tell you about it.
449
00:22:11,964 --> 00:22:13,295
Good night, Dad.
450
00:22:13,332 --> 00:22:14,924
Good night, son.
451
00:22:17,036 --> 00:22:18,731
Am I still grounded?
452
00:22:18,771 --> 00:22:20,238
We'll talk about it.
453
00:22:20,272 --> 00:22:24,470
Hey, talk I can get anywhere.
Hmm?
454
00:22:27,146 --> 00:22:28,875
He won't be back tonight.
31401
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