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1
00:00:01,507 --> 00:00:03,015
Whose car do you think that is?
2
00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:05,054
Must be a rich Omaha banker.
3
00:00:05,079 --> 00:00:06,915
- You think?
- See, I think it's Meghan and Harry,
4
00:00:06,939 --> 00:00:08,796
because if you wanted
to escape the castle,
5
00:00:08,821 --> 00:00:10,562
what better place to
hide than Bucksnort?
6
00:00:10,587 --> 00:00:11,977
Whoever it is, we should stop staring,
7
00:00:12,001 --> 00:00:13,774
because obviously,
they don't want a lot of attention.
8
00:00:13,798 --> 00:00:16,617
- A little attention, please!
- Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh!
9
00:00:16,773 --> 00:00:17,914
Oh, my God.
10
00:00:17,939 --> 00:00:19,047
That's, um...
11
00:00:19,071 --> 00:00:21,710
Mrs. Skillet from Mrs. Skillet's Diner.
12
00:00:21,735 --> 00:00:23,765
We ate there when we
first drove into Nebraska.
13
00:00:23,790 --> 00:00:25,391
Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes.
It's got the jingle, right?
14
00:00:25,415 --> 00:00:26,415
The jingle, yeah.
15
00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:29,828
? If your tummy's empty,
we can fill it ?
16
00:00:29,853 --> 00:00:31,601
? Mrs. Skillet ?
17
00:00:31,626 --> 00:00:33,421
? Got the breakfast ?
18
00:00:33,446 --> 00:00:35,079
- "Right off of Route 34."
- Yeah.
19
00:00:35,103 --> 00:00:36,398
- Should we say hi?
- Yeah.
20
00:00:36,423 --> 00:00:37,843
Well, let me have it back.
21
00:00:37,868 --> 00:00:39,781
Mrs. Skillet. Mrs. Skillet.
22
00:00:39,806 --> 00:00:41,408
My name's Rio. I'm
just a really big fan.
23
00:00:41,433 --> 00:00:42,907
Well, I'd think a "big fan" would know
24
00:00:42,931 --> 00:00:46,035
that my real name is
Dolores Skelmersdale.
25
00:00:46,060 --> 00:00:48,500
- Skelmersdale. That's great.
- Skelmers... Skelmer...
26
00:00:48,525 --> 00:00:49,627
- I'm Mike.
- Hi.
27
00:00:49,652 --> 00:00:51,218
What... What brings you to Bucksnort?
28
00:00:51,243 --> 00:00:54,015
Well, I'm opening a new
franchise down the road.
29
00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:55,875
- Oh!
- Oh, my Go...
30
00:00:55,900 --> 00:00:57,101
- Score!
- Ooh! Sign us up.
31
00:00:57,126 --> 00:00:58,148
Here's my card.
32
00:00:58,173 --> 00:00:59,882
- Ooh, a card.
- Don't call, though.
33
00:00:59,907 --> 00:01:01,625
- You know... No.
- Don't call.
34
00:01:01,650 --> 00:01:03,179
Um, will you be rude to me next?
35
00:01:03,204 --> 00:01:06,007
- I don't think I have the time.
- She did.
36
00:01:13,140 --> 00:01:15,077
Well, hello there...
37
00:01:15,491 --> 00:01:17,190
Betsy.
38
00:01:17,809 --> 00:01:20,104
I'm off the clock.
You'll have to pump your own gas.
39
00:01:20,129 --> 00:01:22,524
We're not liable for slips,
falls, or explosions.
40
00:01:22,549 --> 00:01:24,526
Do you know who I am?
41
00:01:24,551 --> 00:01:26,088
You're not the president, are you?
42
00:01:26,113 --> 00:01:27,901
I don't follow the news.
43
00:01:27,926 --> 00:01:29,510
Tall and funny.
44
00:01:30,644 --> 00:01:32,377
What are you drinking?
45
00:01:32,402 --> 00:01:34,479
This, I guess.
46
00:01:45,288 --> 00:01:46,885
Mmm.
47
00:02:01,368 --> 00:02:02,955
Yeah.
48
00:02:11,630 --> 00:02:13,754
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
49
00:02:19,755 --> 00:02:20,996
Hey, honey.
50
00:02:21,021 --> 00:02:23,020
I've been reading up on Mrs. Skillet,
51
00:02:23,044 --> 00:02:25,434
and she had a big ol' scandal last year.
52
00:02:25,459 --> 00:02:27,106
- Oh.
- Turns out their powdered eggs
53
00:02:27,131 --> 00:02:28,886
were cut with baby powder.
54
00:02:28,911 --> 00:02:30,153
- Mm-mm-mm.
- That's gross.
55
00:02:30,178 --> 00:02:31,864
Yeah. Now she's trying to rebrand,
56
00:02:31,889 --> 00:02:33,294
and I thought... ding!
57
00:02:33,318 --> 00:02:34,965
what about this as a PR move?
58
00:02:34,990 --> 00:02:38,020
- Okay.
- They add an item to their menu...
59
00:02:38,045 --> 00:02:40,862
Local eggs from our farm!
60
00:02:40,887 --> 00:02:42,379
- Huh?
- I like that.
61
00:02:42,404 --> 00:02:43,817
I have a meeting with her tomorrow.
62
00:02:43,842 --> 00:02:45,629
- I'm so excited.
- And I-I... This is it.
63
00:02:45,654 --> 00:02:47,239
This is what we've been working for!
64
00:02:47,264 --> 00:02:48,529
I mean, I don't want to overstate it,
but I think
65
00:02:48,553 --> 00:02:51,059
our whole life has been
leading up to this moment.
66
00:02:51,084 --> 00:02:52,162
Hang on a second.
67
00:02:52,186 --> 00:02:54,503
- What do we got?
- It's Kay. She keeps texting me.
68
00:02:54,528 --> 00:02:55,560
She wants me to go over there.
69
00:02:55,584 --> 00:02:57,512
She's helping Jacob and Janine
plan their engagement party,
70
00:02:57,536 --> 00:02:58,541
and I don't think it's going well,
71
00:02:58,565 --> 00:03:01,121
'cause she keeps texting me
"Duck that witch."
72
00:03:01,146 --> 00:03:02,832
- It's autocorrect.
- "Duck that witch"...
73
00:03:02,857 --> 00:03:04,520
- Work it out.
- Okay.
74
00:03:04,545 --> 00:03:05,923
- So I got to get over there.
- Okay, it's getting hot over there.
75
00:03:05,947 --> 00:03:07,216
- Yeah.
- Uh, can I come with you?
76
00:03:07,240 --> 00:03:09,303
Because I-I want to get a
couple tips for my presentation.
77
00:03:09,327 --> 00:03:11,169
Beau told me he's, like,
an incredible salesman,
78
00:03:11,193 --> 00:03:13,457
and I bought it, so I'm thinking,
maybe he is.
79
00:03:13,482 --> 00:03:14,918
- Maybe he is. Yeah.
- Alright.
80
00:03:14,943 --> 00:03:17,463
I don't think you understand
how expensive it is
81
00:03:17,488 --> 00:03:19,379
to rent out an entire water park.
82
00:03:19,404 --> 00:03:20,654
- How is everyone?
- .. talking about this.
83
00:03:20,678 --> 00:03:22,965
Our engagement party has
to be at a water park!
84
00:03:22,990 --> 00:03:24,317
Why can't we just have it here?
85
00:03:24,342 --> 00:03:26,526
Because I'll look stupid
walking around the house
86
00:03:26,551 --> 00:03:27,695
in my bathing suit!
87
00:03:27,719 --> 00:03:28,911
Oh, my God!
88
00:03:28,936 --> 00:03:30,114
Janine... hey...
89
00:03:30,139 --> 00:03:32,282
You can go eat a foot-long
hot dog, Janine!
90
00:03:32,307 --> 00:03:34,457
You know she just ate lunch!
91
00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:37,629
- Hi, Rio. You look very nice today.
- Hi. Hi.
92
00:03:37,654 --> 00:03:39,764
- God, this is a nightmare!
- Well...
93
00:03:39,789 --> 00:03:42,292
No, their demands don't
even make any sense.
94
00:03:42,317 --> 00:03:44,808
Janine wants Coachella to perform live.
95
00:03:44,833 --> 00:03:46,529
- Coachella?
- Yeah.
96
00:03:46,554 --> 00:03:47,795
You know how hard she is to get?
97
00:03:47,819 --> 00:03:50,310
She's the biggest act in show business.
98
00:03:50,335 --> 00:03:51,380
Ohhh, dear.
99
00:03:51,405 --> 00:03:53,170
Kay, just remember what
we were talking about.
100
00:03:53,194 --> 00:03:54,474
They're inseparable.
101
00:03:54,499 --> 00:03:56,943
- They're a united front against you.
- Mm-hmm.
102
00:03:56,968 --> 00:03:59,622
You got to put on a big ol' smile
103
00:03:59,647 --> 00:04:01,208
and ingratiate yourself,
104
00:04:01,233 --> 00:04:02,810
- be on their team, okay?
- Mm-hmm.
105
00:04:02,835 --> 00:04:05,005
And then you can destroy
them from the inside,
106
00:04:05,030 --> 00:04:06,169
like a tapeworm.
107
00:04:06,194 --> 00:04:08,716
Alright. I think can put on
a pleasant face. How's this?
108
00:04:09,294 --> 00:04:11,130
Work on it.
109
00:04:13,367 --> 00:04:15,450
That's it. That's... That's the one.
110
00:04:15,475 --> 00:04:16,856
That's the one.
111
00:04:17,132 --> 00:04:18,615
Now, if you follow this ascending line,
112
00:04:18,639 --> 00:04:19,640
what you're gonna see is, more and more
113
00:04:19,664 --> 00:04:21,567
Americans are valuing organic...
114
00:04:21,592 --> 00:04:23,215
- No. No...
- ... healthy, local...
115
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:26,169
Business out here is about
relationships, not numbers.
116
00:04:26,194 --> 00:04:28,161
You walk in there
with a bottle of scotch,
117
00:04:28,186 --> 00:04:29,676
and you give Dolores a nickname,
118
00:04:29,701 --> 00:04:32,106
like "Chief" or "Pinky"
or "Ding Dong Daddy."
119
00:04:32,131 --> 00:04:34,295
And you don't think she'll be offended
if I call her "Ding Dong Daddy"?
120
00:04:34,319 --> 00:04:35,575
It's a power play.
121
00:04:36,014 --> 00:04:38,141
And so is this.
122
00:04:39,728 --> 00:04:41,121
Well, no... I...
123
00:04:41,146 --> 00:04:42,997
- You want to try it?
- Yeah, let me try.
124
00:04:43,474 --> 00:04:44,481
Hold on. Let me try it.
125
00:04:44,506 --> 00:04:46,169
- Watch that thing!
- Sorry.
126
00:04:50,449 --> 00:04:52,153
Hi, Betsy.
127
00:04:52,178 --> 00:04:55,340
I just stopped by to give
you a little present.
128
00:04:55,365 --> 00:04:57,341
For me?
129
00:04:57,412 --> 00:04:58,809
Wow.
130
00:04:59,214 --> 00:05:02,887
I just thought this would bring
out those blue eyes of yours.
131
00:05:02,912 --> 00:05:04,223
- Does it?
- Ohh.
132
00:05:04,248 --> 00:05:06,098
I can't see my eyes.
133
00:05:06,130 --> 00:05:08,200
You're adorable.
134
00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,676
- Are you seducing me?
- I'm trying.
135
00:05:10,701 --> 00:05:12,965
- I can't get you out of my mind.
- Oh, boy.
136
00:05:12,990 --> 00:05:14,965
Drinking that slushie.
137
00:05:14,990 --> 00:05:16,825
- So slowly.
- Mm-hmm.
138
00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:19,669
Mrs. Skelmersdale,
I find your attention very flattering,
139
00:05:19,694 --> 00:05:21,589
but you need to know the truth about me.
140
00:05:21,614 --> 00:05:23,575
I may seem like some gas station Zaddy,
141
00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:25,473
but I've done some
bad things in my life.
142
00:05:25,498 --> 00:05:27,512
I gambled away my money,
committed insurance fraud,
143
00:05:27,537 --> 00:05:28,740
loved two women and lost them both.
144
00:05:28,764 --> 00:05:30,826
Now I live in a barn with a
goat that sleeps on my face.
145
00:05:30,850 --> 00:05:32,372
I'm bad news. Do you hear me?
146
00:05:32,397 --> 00:05:34,606
I want to read every page.
147
00:05:34,631 --> 00:05:36,551
I'm finding this banter
extremely arousing.
148
00:05:36,576 --> 00:05:38,403
I have a hotel room in Omaha.
149
00:05:38,428 --> 00:05:40,031
I'm not sure I can maintain
this level of ardor
150
00:05:40,055 --> 00:05:41,559
for a two-hour drive.
151
00:05:42,111 --> 00:05:44,145
Well, that was a good idea.
152
00:05:44,170 --> 00:05:45,770
I wouldn't have made it to Omaha.
153
00:05:45,795 --> 00:05:46,980
Plus, my shift isn't over,
154
00:05:47,005 --> 00:05:48,903
so it's good I didn't leave the station.
155
00:05:49,959 --> 00:05:53,504
Well, we're gonna have to
get you a suit to match this.
156
00:05:54,169 --> 00:05:55,606
I'm gonna have so much fun
157
00:05:55,631 --> 00:05:57,340
making you over.
158
00:05:57,365 --> 00:06:00,372
And I'm glad that there
isn't a lot of body hair,
159
00:06:00,397 --> 00:06:03,184
but I think we're gonna have to
get rid of what is there.
160
00:06:03,209 --> 00:06:05,146
- Okay.
- And there's just one little thing
161
00:06:05,171 --> 00:06:07,216
- that I need from you.
- Mm-hmm?
162
00:06:07,622 --> 00:06:09,662
It's a non-disclosure agreement.
163
00:06:09,687 --> 00:06:11,787
You can't talk to anyone
about our relationship.
164
00:06:11,812 --> 00:06:13,794
My brand is family-friendly.
165
00:06:13,819 --> 00:06:15,755
I'm not gonna have my personal affairs
166
00:06:15,780 --> 00:06:18,802
splashed all over every
tabloid in Nebraska.
167
00:06:18,904 --> 00:06:22,091
Ours will be a secret love,
like Romeo and Juliet
168
00:06:22,116 --> 00:06:23,506
or some other couple we never heard of
169
00:06:23,530 --> 00:06:24,770
'cause their love was a secret.
170
00:06:26,340 --> 00:06:27,630
There's my boss coming.
171
00:06:27,655 --> 00:06:29,357
Act like I just changed the oil.
172
00:06:29,621 --> 00:06:31,091
You have oil in this?
173
00:06:31,116 --> 00:06:32,794
I do now.
174
00:06:33,081 --> 00:06:34,349
Hey, Beau!
175
00:06:34,374 --> 00:06:35,740
Hey, Deb.
176
00:06:36,144 --> 00:06:37,959
Just putting up my storm windows.
177
00:06:37,984 --> 00:06:39,240
Tornado season.
178
00:06:39,265 --> 00:06:40,373
Yeah? What's the point?
179
00:06:40,398 --> 00:06:43,584
I mean, the bank's gonna
own this farm next month.
180
00:06:43,756 --> 00:06:47,466
I saw how behind you are on
your tractor lease. Eesh.
181
00:06:47,491 --> 00:06:49,413
I guess when you and Kay
were contemplating divorce,
182
00:06:49,437 --> 00:06:50,966
no one was watching the farm, huh?
183
00:06:51,217 --> 00:06:52,701
Ruh-roh!
184
00:06:52,726 --> 00:06:54,341
Bye-bye!
185
00:06:54,643 --> 00:06:58,427
One day, all you mail people
are gonna be replaced by drones.
186
00:06:58,452 --> 00:07:00,615
Stop flirting with me, Beau!
187
00:07:02,709 --> 00:07:04,061
Well, how am I supposed to harvest
188
00:07:04,085 --> 00:07:06,067
if you take back all my equipment?
189
00:07:06,092 --> 00:07:09,013
I have been a loyal customer
for more than 30 years.
190
00:07:09,038 --> 00:07:11,451
Don't do me like this, Dale. Don't...
191
00:07:11,476 --> 00:07:13,074
Who are you talking to?
192
00:07:14,335 --> 00:07:17,990
I have no interest in investing
in an adult bookstore.
193
00:07:18,015 --> 00:07:19,459
What?!
194
00:07:19,920 --> 00:07:21,710
Pornographers.
195
00:07:31,999 --> 00:07:33,880
Okay.
196
00:07:35,249 --> 00:07:38,373
Oh. Beau. What are you doing here?
197
00:07:38,398 --> 00:07:40,193
Hey, Mike. I just, uh, came by...
198
00:07:40,218 --> 00:07:43,349
Well, there they are, my two egg boys.
199
00:07:43,374 --> 00:07:44,849
You know what is wild, Mike,
200
00:07:44,874 --> 00:07:47,076
is that Beau came up with
the same idea you did.
201
00:07:47,101 --> 00:07:49,046
Did he, now?
202
00:07:49,571 --> 00:07:51,311
- Come on in, Mike. I'll see you first.
- Oh, sure.
203
00:07:51,335 --> 00:07:53,373
Let me, uh, give you this.
204
00:07:53,601 --> 00:07:55,615
What a cute little bottle.
205
00:07:55,640 --> 00:07:58,771
Well, I thought to go any
bigger would be tacky.
206
00:08:01,367 --> 00:08:04,107
What's taking those two
pinheads so long upstairs?
207
00:08:04,132 --> 00:08:06,366
'Cause this is disrespectful to
your mother, making her wait.
208
00:08:06,390 --> 00:08:07,951
I told them I needed to talk to them.
209
00:08:07,976 --> 00:08:09,496
You know what you should do?
You should use this.
210
00:08:09,520 --> 00:08:10,927
This is a massager.
211
00:08:10,952 --> 00:08:13,169
Oh, can I take this
and rub it on my butt
212
00:08:13,194 --> 00:08:14,584
and then rub it in Janine's face?
213
00:08:14,609 --> 00:08:17,341
No, woman. Put it on your body.
214
00:08:18,069 --> 00:08:19,974
This isn't gonna work.
You know that, right?
215
00:08:19,999 --> 00:08:21,357
Ohhh!
216
00:08:21,382 --> 00:08:22,849
- What is that?
- Okay.
217
00:08:22,874 --> 00:08:24,990
- How's it not work...
- Oh, God. This is so dumb.
218
00:08:25,015 --> 00:08:26,388
I hate it.
219
00:08:26,707 --> 00:08:27,892
Ahhhhh.
220
00:08:27,917 --> 00:08:29,654
I'm gonna go check on the kids.
221
00:08:29,679 --> 00:08:31,451
Really, really dumb.
222
00:08:31,734 --> 00:08:33,888
I love you so much.
This isn't gross at all.
223
00:08:33,913 --> 00:08:36,201
Guys? Hello? Are you okay?
224
00:08:36,226 --> 00:08:37,498
Yeah, um...
225
00:08:37,523 --> 00:08:39,042
This has been happening a lot lately.
226
00:08:39,067 --> 00:08:41,091
I-I think that her anger at my mom
227
00:08:41,116 --> 00:08:42,843
is making her sick every morning.
228
00:08:42,868 --> 00:08:43,936
I don't know what it's called.
229
00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:46,357
It's like some kind
of... morning sickness.
230
00:08:49,970 --> 00:08:51,857
Could you bring a scrunchie?
231
00:08:52,557 --> 00:08:54,963
Ooh, Mama.
232
00:08:55,609 --> 00:08:56,841
Kay. Kay.
233
00:08:56,866 --> 00:08:58,377
- Oh. Hey. Hey.
- Um...
234
00:08:58,402 --> 00:09:00,291
This thing is great.
235
00:09:00,316 --> 00:09:01,322
- Is it?
- I-I've...
236
00:09:01,347 --> 00:09:04,056
I've never felt more
relaxed in my entire life.
237
00:09:04,089 --> 00:09:05,090
- Good.
- Yeah, I don't know
238
00:09:05,114 --> 00:09:07,056
what I was so worked up
about with Jacob.
239
00:09:07,081 --> 00:09:08,721
- He's just a boy in love.
- Yeah, just...
240
00:09:10,198 --> 00:09:11,718
Oh, are you scatting?
241
00:09:11,743 --> 00:09:13,416
Scooby-doo-bop! Scooby-doo-bop!
242
00:09:13,700 --> 00:09:16,010
I like that you're in this space.
243
00:09:16,035 --> 00:09:18,322
I have some neutral news
244
00:09:18,347 --> 00:09:20,697
that really shouldn't affect
this beautiful composure
245
00:09:20,722 --> 00:09:21,971
that you're experiencing right now.
246
00:09:21,995 --> 00:09:23,556
Hit me. Whatever it is, I'm at peace.
247
00:09:23,581 --> 00:09:25,095
Yeah. Okay, cool. Um...
248
00:09:25,120 --> 00:09:27,025
- Janine might be pregnant.
- What?!
249
00:09:28,013 --> 00:09:30,075
- Might.
- What?!
250
00:09:30,928 --> 00:09:33,061
Stop it! Down! Woman!
251
00:09:33,195 --> 00:09:36,678
So the doctor says, "Rectum?
I damn near killed him!"
252
00:09:37,890 --> 00:09:40,193
That's even funnier the second time.
253
00:09:40,218 --> 00:09:41,529
- Okay.
- I'll see you later.
254
00:09:41,554 --> 00:09:44,287
- Alright.
- Okay.
255
00:09:46,305 --> 00:09:48,084
Hey! Beau?
256
00:09:48,203 --> 00:09:50,717
Hey, man. No hard feelings, right?
257
00:09:50,742 --> 00:09:53,482
Oh, no. Very hard feelings. It's on.
258
00:09:53,507 --> 00:09:56,311
Dolores is coming to my farm
on Tuesday, and I'm gonna win.
259
00:09:56,336 --> 00:09:58,951
Okay, well, she's gonna see
my farm on Tuesday, too.
260
00:09:58,976 --> 00:09:59,976
- Okay?
- Ooh, ahh.
261
00:10:00,001 --> 00:10:01,373
- But we're still friends.
- No.
262
00:10:01,398 --> 00:10:03,225
- We're... We're like gladiators.
- Mnh-mnh.
263
00:10:03,250 --> 00:10:04,702
One day, we fight it out in the ring.
264
00:10:04,726 --> 00:10:06,865
Next day, we...
We go to the gym together.
265
00:10:06,890 --> 00:10:09,139
No, no, no, no, no.
One of us has to die.
266
00:10:09,164 --> 00:10:11,209
That's how gladiators work.
267
00:10:12,115 --> 00:10:13,686
- Unh!
- You... Ohh, ohh!
268
00:10:17,274 --> 00:10:18,668
Let's go.
269
00:10:18,693 --> 00:10:20,490
- Let's do this.
- Come on.
270
00:10:21,794 --> 00:10:23,826
I'm only gonna ask you this once.
271
00:10:23,851 --> 00:10:25,467
How many times did you have sex?
272
00:10:25,492 --> 00:10:27,178
- Twice.
- Zero times.
273
00:10:27,566 --> 00:10:31,186
Okay, guys,
we've got zero and two times.
274
00:10:31,211 --> 00:10:33,585
Those are two different answers.
We're gonna need some details.
275
00:10:33,609 --> 00:10:35,342
Just... I mean, not too many details.
276
00:10:35,367 --> 00:10:38,092
Just the minimum amount of details
required to answer the question.
277
00:10:38,117 --> 00:10:39,490
It was just once,
278
00:10:39,515 --> 00:10:41,771
but we took a really
long break in the middle.
279
00:10:41,796 --> 00:10:45,717
Yeah, and it wasn't
completely 100% all the way.
280
00:10:46,484 --> 00:10:49,123
But then it kind of...
It kind of was 100%.
281
00:10:49,447 --> 00:10:51,053
Do you know what 100% means?
282
00:10:51,078 --> 00:10:53,732
- Um...
- 'Cause I don't know what 100% means!
283
00:10:53,757 --> 00:10:56,061
Hold that. Hold that.
So, get us up to speed.
284
00:10:56,086 --> 00:10:58,022
Can you unpack that a little bit?
285
00:10:58,047 --> 00:10:59,748
Yeah, okay. Um...
286
00:10:59,773 --> 00:11:01,793
So, Janine was wearing
this really thin blouse...
287
00:11:01,818 --> 00:11:03,123
Okay, fast-forward.
288
00:11:03,148 --> 00:11:04,826
And then we got ice cream after.
289
00:11:04,851 --> 00:11:06,498
Jacob needed to get his blood sugar up.
290
00:11:06,523 --> 00:11:08,405
My legs were so weak,
I could barely walk.
291
00:11:08,429 --> 00:11:12,357
Guys, when you say that it wasn't 100%,
292
00:11:12,382 --> 00:11:13,483
- but it also was...
- Mm-hmm.
293
00:11:13,507 --> 00:11:15,277
that's where we're getting,
like, a little muddled.
294
00:11:15,301 --> 00:11:17,623
I just... I don't really
know how to explain it.
295
00:11:17,711 --> 00:11:20,451
You know, it's like when
you're at the community pool
296
00:11:20,476 --> 00:11:23,271
and you dip your toe in
the water to feel if it's cold.
297
00:11:23,743 --> 00:11:25,889
But it was not cold.
298
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:27,998
It was not cold at all.
299
00:11:28,023 --> 00:11:29,943
Then we totally did it 100%.
300
00:11:29,968 --> 00:11:32,146
- But only for a second.
- Well...
301
00:11:32,171 --> 00:11:34,662
I think it's coming into...
To focus a little bit, right?
302
00:11:34,687 --> 00:11:36,014
So, they did have sex,
303
00:11:36,039 --> 00:11:38,162
but it seems that it
was only for one second,
304
00:11:38,187 --> 00:11:40,834
but it was, during
that one second, 100%.
305
00:11:41,733 --> 00:11:43,357
This is a nightmare.
306
00:11:44,641 --> 00:11:45,857
Oh, my God.
307
00:11:45,882 --> 00:11:48,006
I sincerely hope your
day was better than mine.
308
00:11:48,031 --> 00:11:49,217
How was your presentation?
309
00:11:49,242 --> 00:11:51,209
You know what?
I think it was... it was likely
310
00:11:51,234 --> 00:11:53,146
the... the best presentation
of my whole life.
311
00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:54,225
- Really?
- Uh, yes.
312
00:11:54,250 --> 00:11:56,709
But then some S. O. B.
by the name of Beau
313
00:11:56,734 --> 00:11:58,272
showed up to try to
take the job from me!
314
00:11:58,296 --> 00:12:00,250
- He did what?
- The job I created.
315
00:12:00,275 --> 00:12:02,102
I did all the work. It was my idea.
316
00:12:02,127 --> 00:12:03,650
- I thought we were friends.
- Beau s...
317
00:12:03,674 --> 00:12:04,675
- You are friends.
- I really thought...
318
00:12:04,699 --> 00:12:05,728
I thought we had a breakthrough.
319
00:12:05,752 --> 00:12:08,289
Come to find out... no, no.
No, he's a backstabber.
320
00:12:08,314 --> 00:12:09,742
He wants to play dirty, guess what.
321
00:12:09,767 --> 00:12:11,391
I'll tear down his whole operation.
322
00:12:11,416 --> 00:12:13,345
Can I tell you the worst
part of this whole thing?
323
00:12:13,369 --> 00:12:15,139
He doesn't even feel guilty.
324
00:12:16,931 --> 00:12:18,531
Oh, God!
325
00:12:18,556 --> 00:12:20,211
- Oh, oh, God!
- Beau, we have to talk.
326
00:12:20,236 --> 00:12:22,024
I am freaking out!
327
00:12:22,049 --> 00:12:24,849
Oh, God. How can you
even be in here? It reeks.
328
00:12:24,874 --> 00:12:26,643
Smells the same way it always does.
329
00:12:27,018 --> 00:12:29,193
Are you crying? What's wrong?
330
00:12:31,056 --> 00:12:32,568
I went to the pitch.
331
00:12:32,593 --> 00:12:33,778
And?
332
00:12:34,243 --> 00:12:35,935
When I showed up, Mike was there,
333
00:12:35,960 --> 00:12:37,854
trying to steal the job out
from under me.
334
00:12:38,024 --> 00:12:39,576
Son of a biscuit!
335
00:12:39,601 --> 00:12:41,381
What kind of lowlife steals a job
336
00:12:41,406 --> 00:12:43,638
right from under his best friend?!
337
00:12:43,987 --> 00:12:46,506
Maybe he's hard up for cash.
338
00:12:47,446 --> 00:12:49,670
Maybe he's ashamed.
339
00:12:49,932 --> 00:12:51,943
God knows what he's going through!
340
00:12:51,968 --> 00:12:53,195
We got to win this thing.
341
00:12:53,220 --> 00:12:54,698
We're gonna take it from him
342
00:12:54,723 --> 00:12:55,921
'cause we're gonna need that income.
343
00:12:55,945 --> 00:12:57,047
Janine might be pregnant.
344
00:12:57,072 --> 00:12:59,226
- What?!
- Yeah. That's what I said.
345
00:12:59,251 --> 00:13:01,132
Okay, Jacob can't support a family.
346
00:13:01,157 --> 00:13:02,968
He can barely support his head.
347
00:13:05,993 --> 00:13:07,968
How can you be sold out of chicken feed?
348
00:13:07,993 --> 00:13:10,156
Because someone else bought it all?
349
00:13:16,903 --> 00:13:18,340
Alright.
350
00:13:20,686 --> 00:13:21,910
Uh...
351
00:13:22,107 --> 00:13:23,254
Rudy, what the hell happened
352
00:13:23,279 --> 00:13:24,591
to all the chicken
feed I got this morning?
353
00:13:24,615 --> 00:13:26,785
Beau said he'd unload it.
Said you wouldn't mind.
354
00:13:26,810 --> 00:13:28,652
Which is odd, 'cause personally,
I would mind,
355
00:13:28,677 --> 00:13:29,997
'cause what are the chickens gonna eat?
356
00:13:30,021 --> 00:13:31,121
Where'd he unload it?
357
00:13:33,328 --> 00:13:34,556
Oh, ho, ho!
358
00:13:34,581 --> 00:13:37,296
Beau, you son of a biscuit!
359
00:13:38,012 --> 00:13:39,656
This is kidnapping!
360
00:13:39,681 --> 00:13:41,492
You don't deserve these hens, Beau!
361
00:13:41,517 --> 00:13:42,890
Chicken thief!
362
00:13:42,915 --> 00:13:44,560
Get back here!
363
00:13:50,190 --> 00:13:51,588
Go get 'em, Lil' Beau.
364
00:13:52,626 --> 00:13:54,869
This rooster can go all night.
365
00:13:54,894 --> 00:13:56,064
Enjoy.
366
00:13:56,089 --> 00:13:58,359
Okay, this is an absolute disaster.
367
00:13:58,384 --> 00:14:00,410
We can't have a rooster
in here with our girls!
368
00:14:00,435 --> 00:14:02,503
- Where is the...
- Oh! This guy.
369
00:14:02,528 --> 00:14:04,550
Oh, you are going back
to Beau and Kay's.
370
00:14:04,575 --> 00:14:05,599
- How dare you.
- We'll see how funny...
371
00:14:05,623 --> 00:14:07,067
Only one papa in this roost.
372
00:14:07,092 --> 00:14:09,293
No... no... Get him!
He's gonna fertilize all the eggs!
373
00:14:09,318 --> 00:14:11,215
- Catch him! Catch him!
- I'm getting it!
374
00:14:12,313 --> 00:14:15,371
We have to discuss how crazy our
husbands are being right now.
375
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:16,418
Who cares about them?
376
00:14:16,443 --> 00:14:18,942
I'm... I'm out of my mind
about Jacob and Janine.
377
00:14:19,427 --> 00:14:20,981
Does it stink in here?
378
00:14:21,006 --> 00:14:22,434
What is that smell?
379
00:14:22,459 --> 00:14:23,755
- What are you talking about?
- Oh, my God,
380
00:14:23,779 --> 00:14:25,356
I hope Jacob didn't save a baby bird
381
00:14:25,381 --> 00:14:27,067
and forget about it
under the sink again.
382
00:14:27,092 --> 00:14:28,114
- He does that?
- Mm-hmm.
383
00:14:28,139 --> 00:14:29,449
I don't smell anything.
384
00:14:29,474 --> 00:14:31,543
Does sleeping too much make
you sensitive to smells?
385
00:14:31,568 --> 00:14:33,463
Because I've been getting
like 12 hours a night.
386
00:14:33,488 --> 00:14:34,841
I mean, unless
you're a Hamptons housewife
387
00:14:34,865 --> 00:14:36,052
or you ate a big bowl of spaghetti,
388
00:14:36,076 --> 00:14:38,106
that is, like, entirely too much sleep.
389
00:14:38,131 --> 00:14:39,731
I'm just exhausted, you know?
390
00:14:39,756 --> 00:14:42,989
Between Beau and the chickens
and Jacob and that idiot
391
00:14:43,014 --> 00:14:44,739
who can't even tell she's knocked up...
392
00:14:48,946 --> 00:14:49,965
Can I say something?
393
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,262
No, no, don't say it.
394
00:14:51,287 --> 00:14:52,340
You might be pregnant.
395
00:14:52,365 --> 00:14:53,801
I said not to say it.
396
00:14:54,067 --> 00:14:55,415
No, I'm not pregnant.
397
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:57,161
I just swallowed a horsefly
while mowing the lawn.
398
00:14:57,185 --> 00:14:58,442
- Okay.
- Move!
399
00:14:58,467 --> 00:14:59,793
What are you doing? Aw, man.
400
00:15:00,294 --> 00:15:01,825
Janine, good to see you.
401
00:15:01,850 --> 00:15:03,771
Have you bought a pregnancy
test yet, like I told you?
402
00:15:03,795 --> 00:15:06,543
I can't just go to the
store and buy one of those.
403
00:15:06,568 --> 00:15:07,598
God will see.
404
00:15:07,623 --> 00:15:09,082
- "God will see"?
- Shh!
405
00:15:09,107 --> 00:15:10,989
He's probably watching right now.
406
00:15:11,014 --> 00:15:13,590
He's allowed to watch you
in the bathroom, like a doctor.
407
00:15:13,615 --> 00:15:14,645
What is wrong with her?
408
00:15:14,670 --> 00:15:16,388
Kay, you need to buy this
woman a pregnancy test.
409
00:15:16,412 --> 00:15:17,427
You need to buy yourself one, too.
410
00:15:17,451 --> 00:15:19,817
Rio, are you crazy?
We live in a small town!
411
00:15:19,842 --> 00:15:22,362
I can't just waltz into
Connie's a buy a pregnancy test.
412
00:15:22,387 --> 00:15:24,629
Everyone will be talking
about it before sunset.
413
00:15:24,654 --> 00:15:28,035
Fine! I'm gonna go buy you
guys both a pregnancy test.
414
00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:30,090
Nobody pee until I come back.
415
00:15:30,115 --> 00:15:31,590
This is a puke-only toilet.
416
00:15:32,740 --> 00:15:33,895
Great.
417
00:15:35,008 --> 00:15:37,559
Oh, my gosh. You're pregnant?
418
00:15:37,584 --> 00:15:38,817
No. Oh, no, no, no. It's...
419
00:15:38,842 --> 00:15:40,981
Rio is pregnant,
and Mike is not the father.
420
00:15:41,006 --> 00:15:42,700
- Okay... What?
- Oh, yes!
421
00:15:42,725 --> 00:15:43,746
W-Wait, what?!
422
00:15:43,771 --> 00:15:45,293
No. Mike is the father.
423
00:15:45,318 --> 00:15:46,513
No, he's not! I'm not pregnant!
424
00:15:46,537 --> 00:15:48,811
I don't know what... This is ridiculous.
Here. Never mind.
425
00:15:48,835 --> 00:15:50,950
I don't even know why...
This is one of...
426
00:15:50,975 --> 00:15:52,028
Oh, my God! Rudy!
427
00:15:52,584 --> 00:15:54,020
Congratulations.
428
00:15:54,045 --> 00:15:55,209
Do you know who the father is?
429
00:15:55,233 --> 00:15:56,310
Rudy!
430
00:15:56,525 --> 00:15:58,076
- I'm the father?
- No!
431
00:15:58,101 --> 00:15:59,912
Guys, cool it!
432
00:16:00,366 --> 00:16:01,678
Hello, Constance.
433
00:16:01,703 --> 00:16:03,100
You... You look dapper.
434
00:16:03,125 --> 00:16:04,394
Here's a $100 bill.
435
00:16:04,419 --> 00:16:06,029
Don't ask me where it came from.
436
00:16:06,054 --> 00:16:07,944
Rudy, you can tell me anything.
437
00:16:07,969 --> 00:16:09,334
Are you gambling again?
438
00:16:09,359 --> 00:16:10,834
No, never.
439
00:16:10,859 --> 00:16:12,462
I mean, only in the game of love.
440
00:16:12,830 --> 00:16:14,171
I wish I could tell you more than that.
441
00:16:14,195 --> 00:16:16,397
W-Well, you can. I could help you.
442
00:16:16,422 --> 00:16:19,678
Rudy! I have henhouses to inspect.
443
00:16:20,072 --> 00:16:21,365
Huh.
444
00:16:21,390 --> 00:16:23,006
I wonder who that woman is.
445
00:16:23,226 --> 00:16:25,240
Better go find out how
she knows my name.
446
00:16:30,742 --> 00:16:32,436
Oh, you get me!
447
00:16:32,884 --> 00:16:35,756
But you know what? I still have
to check out the Levine-Youngs'.
448
00:16:35,781 --> 00:16:39,217
But I have to say that you have
a very impressive operation.
449
00:16:39,242 --> 00:16:40,490
That's what the sheep said.
450
00:16:40,515 --> 00:16:41,928
You're awful!
451
00:16:41,953 --> 00:16:43,608
Just stop it!
452
00:16:44,797 --> 00:16:47,609
Dolores hasn't made up her mind yet,
but I have a feeling.
453
00:16:47,634 --> 00:16:50,623
Put on your good bra.
We're going to the Sizzler.
454
00:16:50,648 --> 00:16:53,240
Guess it pays to stab your
best friend in the back, right?
455
00:16:53,265 --> 00:16:55,410
Oh, no, no, no.
Beau didn't stab Mike in the back.
456
00:16:55,435 --> 00:16:58,264
I mean, he came up with the idea
to sell to Mrs. Skillet's first.
457
00:16:58,289 --> 00:16:59,851
- Right, Beau?
- This whole thing started
458
00:16:59,875 --> 00:17:01,057
because you stole his idea.
459
00:17:01,082 --> 00:17:02,807
Tell her that's not true, Beau.
460
00:17:04,118 --> 00:17:06,003
Well, I...
461
00:17:08,573 --> 00:17:09,800
It's true.
462
00:17:10,044 --> 00:17:11,846
I stole Mike's idea.
463
00:17:11,871 --> 00:17:13,651
And I lied to you about it.
464
00:17:13,676 --> 00:17:15,690
- Wha...
- I broke your trust.
465
00:17:15,715 --> 00:17:18,901
I'm sorry. I-I-I-I-I hate
myself, alright?
466
00:17:18,926 --> 00:17:20,175
- Oh, don't...
- So, let...
467
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:23,659
I'm just gonna go lay naked
in the gravel driveway
468
00:17:23,684 --> 00:17:25,537
and cover myself in hot mustard
469
00:17:25,562 --> 00:17:27,373
and let the birds peck at my flesh.
470
00:17:27,398 --> 00:17:28,596
It's the least I can do.
471
00:17:28,621 --> 00:17:30,315
Just tell me why you did it.
472
00:17:30,340 --> 00:17:32,193
'Cause I needed the money.
473
00:17:32,218 --> 00:17:34,604
- We're almost broke.
- What...
474
00:17:34,895 --> 00:17:36,862
I-I should have kept
a closer eye on things.
475
00:17:36,887 --> 00:17:39,878
When we got separated,
I-I-I-I dropped the ball.
476
00:17:39,903 --> 00:17:42,425
I know you hate me right now,
and I get it.
477
00:17:42,486 --> 00:17:45,471
Go ahead. Kick me in the nards.
478
00:17:45,825 --> 00:17:48,573
Heel-stomp my grapes
until they make wine.
479
00:17:49,785 --> 00:17:51,393
Um, listen to me.
480
00:17:52,449 --> 00:17:54,677
I don't want to hurt you. I love you.
481
00:17:54,702 --> 00:17:56,620
I don't know why.
482
00:17:56,645 --> 00:17:58,373
I don't deserve your love.
483
00:17:58,398 --> 00:18:00,589
Of course you do, you buttface.
484
00:18:00,927 --> 00:18:03,323
Hey, we're in this together, okay?
485
00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:04,956
A year ago, yeah, sure,
486
00:18:04,981 --> 00:18:06,464
we'd never tell each other anything,
487
00:18:06,489 --> 00:18:09,198
but now we're open, we're honest.
488
00:18:09,368 --> 00:18:11,138
We tell each other everything.
489
00:18:11,163 --> 00:18:12,891
Oh, God.
490
00:18:12,916 --> 00:18:14,010
No.
491
00:18:15,227 --> 00:18:17,191
Guys, come on. You both have
to take a pregnancy test.
492
00:18:17,215 --> 00:18:18,690
No, she does. I'm not pregnant.
493
00:18:18,715 --> 00:18:20,590
You just want me to take
a test so I'll go to hell.
494
00:18:20,614 --> 00:18:21,878
If this condemns you to hell,
495
00:18:21,903 --> 00:18:23,207
that means I'm gonna see you there,
because you know what?
496
00:18:23,231 --> 00:18:24,980
I've peed on literally
hundreds of these tests before.
497
00:18:25,004 --> 00:18:26,847
- Hundreds?! Goodness, Rio.
- You thought you were pregnant
498
00:18:26,871 --> 00:18:28,612
- a lot of times.
- That's a ton of sex.
499
00:18:28,637 --> 00:18:30,980
Is it gonna make you feel better?
I will do one with you right now.
500
00:18:31,004 --> 00:18:32,745
Come on. Up and at 'em.
Let's make it rain.
501
00:18:32,770 --> 00:18:34,393
Look alive. Here we go.
502
00:18:34,418 --> 00:18:37,057
You didn't have
to prepare me a whole meal.
503
00:18:37,082 --> 00:18:39,003
An egg's an egg.
504
00:18:45,677 --> 00:18:47,554
Oh, my God.
505
00:18:50,434 --> 00:18:53,005
This is the best egg I've ever had.
506
00:18:54,426 --> 00:18:55,706
Oh, is that good to hear!
507
00:18:55,731 --> 00:18:58,721
I have put so much work into these,
and I just... I really...
508
00:18:58,746 --> 00:18:59,973
It's really important to me...
509
00:18:59,998 --> 00:19:02,917
Oh, no, no. You don't need to do that.
510
00:19:09,484 --> 00:19:12,409
I made my mind up
before I came over here,
511
00:19:13,018 --> 00:19:15,550
but you have really surprised me.
512
00:19:15,575 --> 00:19:18,706
You have surprised me.
I've... I've never seen that.
513
00:19:18,731 --> 00:19:21,776
Uh, c-can I get you something to...
to wash that down with?
514
00:19:21,820 --> 00:19:23,612
Mnh-mnh.
515
00:19:24,438 --> 00:19:26,682
So, what am I looking for here?
516
00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:28,807
- And why is yours so wet?
- What?
517
00:19:28,832 --> 00:19:30,378
Good Lord! Rio!
518
00:19:30,403 --> 00:19:32,940
You can't score extra
credit on a pregnancy test.
519
00:19:32,965 --> 00:19:34,573
I refuse to be criticized right now
520
00:19:34,598 --> 00:19:36,096
for my aim and hydration.
521
00:19:36,121 --> 00:19:37,871
Alright, well,
these results may take a while.
522
00:19:37,895 --> 00:19:39,456
These expired in '07.
523
00:19:39,481 --> 00:19:41,854
That's alright.
We're gonna wait here, ladies.
524
00:19:41,879 --> 00:19:44,104
We got all the time in the world.
525
00:19:45,788 --> 00:19:49,010
Hey, uh, I was hoping we could talk.
526
00:19:49,035 --> 00:19:50,284
I got news for you.
527
00:19:50,309 --> 00:19:51,917
Unless something crazy happens,
528
00:19:51,942 --> 00:19:54,331
looks like Mrs. Skillet's
gonna go with my eggs.
529
00:19:54,356 --> 00:19:57,018
So, all that backstabbing,
that was for nothing.
530
00:19:57,043 --> 00:19:59,823
No one wants your eggs,
and no one wants your friendship.
531
00:19:59,848 --> 00:20:01,378
I deserve that.
532
00:20:01,645 --> 00:20:04,784
But just know no one hates Beau Bowman
533
00:20:04,809 --> 00:20:06,573
as much as Beau Bowman
hates Beau Bowman.
534
00:20:06,598 --> 00:20:07,854
Well, you are kidding yourself,
535
00:20:07,879 --> 00:20:10,292
because Mike Levine-Young
hates Beau Bowman way worse
536
00:20:10,317 --> 00:20:11,671
than Beau Bowman hates Beau Bowman.
537
00:20:11,695 --> 00:20:13,714
Oh, yeah? Well, what Mike Levine-Young
538
00:20:13,739 --> 00:20:15,651
needs to know is that Beau Bowman...
539
00:20:15,876 --> 00:20:17,987
Can we go back to using pronouns?
540
00:20:21,793 --> 00:20:23,105
Does that mean we're all pregnant?
541
00:20:23,129 --> 00:20:24,551
No, no, no. That's the tornado siren.
542
00:20:24,575 --> 00:20:26,346
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- A tornado, like, warning,
543
00:20:26,370 --> 00:20:28,315
or, like, a tornado's
happening right now?
544
00:20:28,340 --> 00:20:30,245
Like, get to the shelter, Dorothy,
545
00:20:30,270 --> 00:20:33,159
because in real life,
you don't go to Oz, okay?
546
00:20:33,184 --> 00:20:34,635
Your face gets planted in a tree.
547
00:20:34,660 --> 00:20:35,660
- Get inside!
- Alright!
548
00:20:35,685 --> 00:20:37,651
I'll be in the basement!
Good luck getting home!
549
00:20:37,676 --> 00:20:39,925
I'm not going home,
unless it's to Jesus!
550
00:20:39,957 --> 00:20:41,465
We got to get to the basement. Let's go.
551
00:20:41,489 --> 00:20:42,519
Wait, wait, I don't want this.
552
00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:44,112
- Okay, o-okay, um...
- Well, me either.
553
00:20:44,137 --> 00:20:46,748
So, you, um, are gonna be
in my right pocket.
554
00:20:46,773 --> 00:20:48,126
Kay, you're in my left pocket.
555
00:20:48,150 --> 00:20:50,287
I'll do upper-booby pocket. Okay, good.
556
00:20:50,312 --> 00:20:51,713
Oh, I feel like I got to
give this jump suit away.
557
00:20:51,737 --> 00:20:52,758
There's, like, pee all over it.
558
00:20:52,782 --> 00:20:54,507
Hey, go! Go!
41046
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