Original subtitles

I'm tired of being bossed around

To get some air, some breathing room.

I'm going out without you.

I can't tell you whether I'll be back or not.

What's gotten into you, Merlaux?

I'm here to kill you, Colonel.

You betrayed my father, tried to kill me, and worked with the Nazis.

Say it.

Say: "I'm a dirty collaborator, I'm a scumbag.

I'm the shame of France."

Say it.

I'm your father, André.

What does this "resurrection" signify? It is mentioned...

You're alive!

Two superpowers, two blocs, two ideologies,

two monsters lurking in the shadows,

two opponents fueled by ferocious hate.

They share the same aspiration.

To destroy, exterminate, annihilate their opponent,

mercilessly and remorselessly, until only one is left standing,

even if there is nobody left.

This is our world,

a new world,

the world of the Cold War.

I'm not done yet.

We could use a drink.

To your resurrection, my son.

I have something to ask you.

-Something important. -I'm all ears.

Is it possible that Mercaillon is my father?

Excuse me.

Your mother, your father and Mercaillon were...

indeed very close in the Resistance.

And your parents broke off all contact with Mercaillon

during the last years of the war.

Why?

-Your parents were Communists. -Communists?

That's how they met in '36.

They belonged to the same section.

It was the Popular Front, a nation's hope that change was coming.

They kept that dream alive in the Resistance.

They believed in the Great Night.

Mercaillon was a bourgeois. He hated Communists.

Why were they so close, then?

Because at the height of our fight against the Nazis,

all of our forces could assemble.

And also,

and this is crucial,

Mercaillon was in love with your mother.

She's the only person who could tell you the truth about this.

But when the Vulcain network fell,

she was captured by the Gestapo.

No one has seen her since.

What could've attracted my parents to Communism?

Two Germanies, East and West,

four Berlins, East, West, North and South.

Two Vietnams, North and South. Two Koreas, North and South.

Two Chinas,

Taiwan and Mainland China.

And Hong Kong.

Three Chinas.

Two Mexicos, North and South.

We already have to deal with the real countries...

I was just thinking there's no such thing as South Mexico.

Not yet. Please!

In this world where latent conflicts abound,

everything must be viewed through the prism of the Cold War.

The simplest question or phrase

could potentially be coded.

For example,

can you guess what this means?

"Yvette loves big carrots"?

Moulinier?

What does it mean? "Yvette loves big carrots."

I'd venture that this Yvette has got a dirty mind.

You just missed crucial information

about a weapons airdrop during a hot war.

What will happen if you make that mistake during this Cold War?

Thank you, Mr. Calot.

But I'm not done yet.

You're out of time. Ladies and gentlemen...

here's the schedule for our "hobbies and passions" conferences.

In April, Marie-Jo will tell us about buckwheat crepes.

In May, Mr. Pochon will talk about model railroading. In June...

Sorry, Mr. Schmid, but if it's possible...

instead of the crepes,

I'd rather tackle the subject of parrot photography.

Because, you know, it's 1961. It's more modern, I think.

Well, look, the schedule was stamped during Week 48

of the previous fiscal year. If we all

change hobbies in Week 5, it'll never work out.

Buckwheat crepes are modern enough.

In June, Mr. Moulinier will talk about the Alpine ibex.

You've reached the Mercaillon household. Hello.

Mr. Mercaillon speaking. Is she back?

Not yet, sir.

If she comes back, would you like me to deliver

a message to her?

No. No need for that.

COLD WAR

What are you doing, Calot?

Are you moving out again?

I'm bringing back the files for my hilarious conference.

Don't overreact. It was just friendly banter.

You gotta see the comedy in Commies.

Yvette and her big carrots.

You'll stop laughing when an atomic bomb hits Europe.

Any day could be doomsday.

If we lose our focus for a mere second...

Come on, no need to exaggerate.

Your region being trendy

doesn't make it riskier than others.

Calot, what are you doing?

I'm returning these files and heading to Berlin for a quadripartite meeting.

What about you, Moulinier?

Well, I've got a bunch of stuff to do.

We're going to change things up a bit, for a change.

We're stuck in a rut,

going through the motions. Moulinier, you're going to Berlin, not Calot.

You can't do that. It's a complex region.

This is an order.

But, what am I going to do?

Take a break. It'll do you good. You look exhausted.

Not at all. I sleep very well, sometimes several times a night.

-And I never go on vacations. -That's why you need one, for a change.

What am I going to do on vacation?

Do what other people do. Slip on some shorts and sandals.

Send some postcards.

Give all this to Moulinier,

and go relax.

And for the rest of you, it's time for drinks.

But, Colonel, it's only a quarter past nine.

We never have drinks before eleven.

Well, things are changing!

You can go write me a briefing on Berlin. It'll be a good exercise for you.

I'm on it, Mr. Moulinier.

You're not having drinks with us, Mr. Calot?

No, I'm on vacation.

Your conference was very interesting.

Thanks.

How long have you been interested in parrot photographs?

Oh, I find them pretty but I'm not sure everyone does.

I would!

I need to go.

Hold on.

Have you ever taken a vacation?

Yes, a couple of days.

And what do you do with your time?

Well, hmm, I... It depends.

I might rest or... visit my mother.

And what if your mother weren't around, what would you do?

I don't know.

One time, I went on a trip with my sister.

I'm awfully sorry, but I really need to go now.

Enjoy your vacation.

THE CAPITAL KARL MARX

Two regulation pajamas, two suitcases.

Why two?

You're one person, times two zones: East and West Berlin. So two.

-Four city maps. -Why four?

Four zones. French, British, Soviet and American.

-That adds up to four. -Of course.

Signature.

All right.

Enjoy your mission.

Here's your briefing.

I asked you for a briefing, not an encyclopedia.

Yes, but when one delves into it a little,

one must admit that Mr. Calot isn't wrong. It's a complex region.

By the way, he said you might have trouble navigating it.

Let's not exaggerate, shall we?

I also wanted to tell you that, as I was drafting this,

I intercepted a telegram that was sent from Berlin.

I don't know what zone it's from, but I'm adding it to the file

because it did seem kind of odd.

It says: "The ape is in the rocket."

We could ask Mr. Calot if he knows what that means?

Enough with Calot.

I don't need him to read a telegram.

I was just kidding, of course. And now that he's on break,

we get a break too, right?

I was kidding, of course.

Gentlemen,

together, our nations have together over the Nazi threat.

Great Britain is appealing to the noble spirit of this alliance

and to each member's responsibility

to find common ground

on the matters that brought us together today

in a spirit of unity and peace.

France will honor its responsibilities, as always.

To start off,

Great Britain contests the notice it received about the required payment

of 4,356 British pounds

to rehabilitate Berlin's sewage network.

Since the Soviets

hold 354 thousandths of the network's entire length,

a percentage that is one point five times higher than that of Great Britain,

Great Britain wishes to bring its share up to 54%.

We don't use the quadripartite sewage network.

-What network do you use then? -This is none of your business.

If you've completed works, where are your authorizations?

It's not in a shared area,

so we do not need authorizations.

Yes you do.

It it's structural work, you do.

Whatever you do in your zone...

The most innocuous question or phrase

could potentially be coded.

You'll stop laughing when an atomic bomb hits Europe.

Any day could be doomsday.

It's a matter of thousandths...

If you want to save money, let's start by turning off

street lighting after 8 pm.

It's useless.

I know you there's nothing to do at night in your country,

but in ours, citizens are also free to live at night.

Gentlemen, in an effort to ease tensions,

Great Britain may consider

limiting the reduction of its share to 58 rather than 54%,

which would lower its contribution.

If this were the case, could we not

submit this resolution for a vote?

Who says "yes"?

Who says "no"?

What is France's position on this resolution?

France...

abstains.

Next resolution.

FONDEST WISHES FROM THE CAPITAL

And resolution approved...

Yvette loves big carrots.

...on the color of tiles in the shared areas.

Great Britain thanks you.

I'm sorry, gentlemen. Gentlemen?

France wishes to add a point

that was not listed on the agenda.

-You can't do that. -Just a minor point to settle.

You should ask for it to be included

on the agenda of the next regular meeting.

Only if there is one.

That's the question...

because France is worried, gentlemen.

France is an old country,

a great nation whose diplomatic tradition is well-established.

France has always sought to reconcile all the tribes... hmm...

peoples.

So France...

thanks to its top-notch Intelligence, intercepted a message

that clearly indicates that one of the nations represented at this table

is planning a nuclear strike on one of the other nations.

Who is it?

-Yes, who is it? -"Who" is irrelevant, gentlemen.

We're not here to point fingers

and figure out who the guilty party is.

I know there are tensions,

everyone surely holds some of the blame,

and France merely seeks to ease tensions, like it always does.

I mean, what's the point of dropping bombs on one another

if no one's left to cheer for the victors?

So let's just all get along, we can drop our machetes

and let's turn the Cold War into the Warm War.

No?

You will be fully responsible for another world war,

which you will lose.

This is an unacceptable accusation.

Please! We said we wouldn't be accusing anyone.

If we are provoked, we will retaliate.

Gentlemen?

Same here.

The USSR has allies everywhere, even in America.

It will protect them at all cost.

What are you implying?

If we ask them to, I am sure

our Cuban friends would be ready to take in

whatever is needed to defend the Communist world.

You plan to arm Cuba?

Brilliant idea! Thank you.

Gentlemen, don't get carried away.

I told you France was worried in the hope to ease tensions.

By the way, I've been to Cuba myself...

Gentlemen, I believe this meeting is over.

-Yes. -Gentlemen?

Gentlemen, come back.

It's a three-letter name.

A name that will go down in history.

Today, January 31, 1961,

Ham paves the way to the stars for America's astronauts.

The three-year old chimp from Cameroon,

boarded a Mercury capsule,

and became the first living creature to survive spaceflight.

What's wrong?

We've seen enough.

-You don't agree? -So the ape in the rocket...

it was just about an ape in a rocket.

Should we go and eat lunch?

Did you know that the Americans were launching an African ape into space?

-Of course I did. -I, for one, am impressed...

Because they're launching beasts into space?

I don't get the point. What will it be next?

A tapir? A platypus?

The Soviets will be sending men to space,

not the local zoo's residents.

They'd better hurry up then,

because with all the people joining the West,

they'll soon run out of men for their rocket.

There are also people who flee democracy.

So are we going out for lunch?

Why is it that the Soviets are threatening to set up missiles

in Cuba and we're being blamed for it?

What the heck did you do in Berlin, Moulinier?

You told me everything went smoothly.

Did you lie? It didn't go down that well?

You know what these meetings are like.

They drag on for hours. People quibble and argue.

There was a bit of friction, but nothing serious.

I've received 12 telexes from 12 different countries

who worry about a severance of ties

between the Soviets and the Americans

due to a huge crisis in Berlin.

It's surely just a misunderstanding. I'll see what I can do.

-Why don't we send Jacquard in? -I have nothing to do with this.

Anybody can barge into my region to wreak havoc!

That's enough! The three of you!

If you keep it up, I'll send you you on a mission to the Eastern front!

Come on! They get ticked off so easily in your region!

If you've been behaving in Africa like you just did in Berlin,

you can expect the mess you created in your region

to blow up in your face! And it'll hurt really bad, and for a long time!

He's such a glass-half-empty kind of guy.

Should we go out for lunch?

Where are you off to?

I won't bother you anymore with my mess. I'm gone.

Don't be ridiculous. Where are you going to stay?

I know where I need to go. Don't worry about me.

You wait for Mercaillon to retire.

You wouldn't want to take any risks. Keep on stamping for France!

If you're lucky, you'll get a bonus.

-What is that supposed to mean? -Goodbye, Moïse.

What are you going to do?

What I expected to do by your side: fight.

Approaching Mercaillon would be reckless.

I'm not afraid of him.

What did you do to him this time? He's been weird lately.

Mercaillon, you bastard.

-Goodbye, Moïse. -Don't do anything foolish!

-You've come to your senses. -I've come to pick up my clothes.

Do you really think you could live on your own?

I do.

And where are you going to stay?

How will you get the money for the rent?

You can't even open a bank account.

-I could sell my body. -At your age?

I'm 41. I've been married to you for the past 20 years.

I've raised your two kids who no longer need me.

It's time for me to live my own life.

My two kids?

Our daughter and your son.

Should we talk about him?

About his blond hair? His affinity for Wagner?

You have no right...

Stay, Irène, your place is here.

No.

I'm bored to death here!

I can't spend the rest of my life in this dull apartment,

with Marthe and your slippers...

and your civil servant job with Veterans Affairs.

I need some fresh air,

adventure, surprises.

You know what? I'll just leave it all here. Bad memories.

Everything you have, you owe to me,

including this outfit.

You want to keep it?

As a memento.

I never liked it anyway.

It's brownish and dull,

like everything else around here.

Everything.

This tablecloth is mine. It's from Mom's hope chest.

You're going out like this? Have you gone insane?

So long, Maurice.

I'm the head of French Intelligence Services.

I have the General on the phone every day.

I'm a dangerous man, Irène.

If I told you about all the people I got killed,

and that I get killed every single day!

Maurice.

Ah, I knew it!

Colonel Maurice Mercaillon?

That's me.

Your strength, integrity and courage

have led General de Gaulle to select you

to lead, in deepest secrecy, negotiations with the FLN.

You're off to Algiers.

TOP SECRET

Here's the answer to your request.

-Mr. Moulinier? -Yes?

I'm doing the course on intercepting messages.

I heard something. I'd like to run it by you first.

Go ahead.

"Imminent landing in the Bay of Pigs."

Don't waste your time with this.

It only means some pigs are going to bathe.

There you go. Have a good evening, Guy.

That's what I thought. But when in doubt...

Have a good evening, Mr. Moulinier.

Subtitle translation by Thomas Isackson