All language subtitles for Irreconcilable.Differences.1984.720p.BRRip.x264-PLAYNOW

Yeah.

Mrs. Carlin's called four times.

Her husband's two months late
with her child support again.

And your 10:00 just walked in.

Tell Mrs. Carlin I'll get back to her,
and show Miss Brodsky in.

Yes, sir.

Hi.

Come on in. Have a seat.

Well, I've thought a lot
about your situation,

and I've decided to take your case.

And based on what you've told me,
I think we can win.

I just want you to be sure
you know what you're getting into.

Divorce is a big adjustment
for anybody to make.

Now, you've been together
almost 10 years.

That's an awful long time
to share a life with someone.

So I just want you to be certain

that you're ready to throw it all away

and be out there on your own.

I'm ready, Mr. Hanner.

I want to divorce my parents.

Free Casey Brodsky!

Tom, I'm standing in front of
the Superior Court building

at downtown Los Angeles,

where an anxious crowd
is awaiting the arrival

of the Brodsky family

for the opening day of testimony

in this unprecedented
child emancipation case.

Casey Brodsky, a fourth grade student

at Mann Elementary School
in West Los Angeles,

is attempting to divorce her parents,

Lucy Van Patten Brodsky
and Albert Brodsky.

While Casey is not the first child
in this state to seek a divorce,

she definitely is the youngest.

Divorcing one's parents
is legally referred to

as the Emancipation of Minors Act.

Now basically, this act says

that any minor in the State of California

can be divorced from his or her parents

if that minor can prove
that the emancipation

is in their own best interest.

And that, of course,
is what this trial is all about.

Ms. Brodsky, is it true you were served
your daughter's divorce papers

while appearing on The Merv Griffin Show?

Ms. Brodsky, how do you feel
about your daughter

asking the court to appoint
your housekeeper

as her legal guardian?

Can I have your autograph?

Your book changed my life.

Hey, that's a great purse there, Lucy.
Where'd you get that?

Ms. Brodsky, is it true
your daughter's asking you for alimony?

Hey, Brodsky!

That, of course, was
the plaintiffs mother

and the codefendant in this case,

novelist Lucy Van Patten Brodsky.

Now the proceedings
are about to begin

here at the county courthouse.

However, we are awaiting the arrival
of the plaintiffs father,

film director Albert Brodsky.

Mr. Brodsky?

Hi. I'm Alan Sclusa
from the Salkin office.

I'm gonna be
representing you on this case.

- Where's Salkin?
- Mr. Salkin can't be here.

He's gonna be busy all week.

Wait. He's not coming at all?

He's been my lawyer for ten years.

What? Suddenly I'm not
big enough for him?

Oh, shit.

Mom, Dad.

Casey.

- Casey, come here.
- Casey, I want to talk to you.

Why haven't you
returned my phone calls?

My lawyer advised me
not to speak to you.

Your lawyer?
This whole thing is so crazy.

You are 8 years old.
What are you doing?

I am 9.

Can you hold still for just a minute?

I'm sorry that you overheard
your father and I fighting that day.

We shouldn't have involved you, I know.

But dragging us into court--

I mean, suddenly we're a media event.

Mother, you and Dad for a long time

did not recognize my rights
as a human being.

You both treat me like chattel.

You cannot do with me
as you please anymore.

We have irreconcilable differences.

Oh, my God. She's been brainwashed.

Are you gonna say anything?

Casey, are you doing this
because your mother's

been so insensitive to you?

Do you know how not be a worm?

Casey.

I understand why you want
to divorce your father.

I know you never got over
his abandoning us.

No, Mom, you never
got over his abandoning us.

Let's not blame this whole thing on me.

All Casey needs is a little love

from a parent who's
not too busy to do it.

And what do you know about love?

I'm human being, too, you know.

Since when?

Casey.

Casey, honey, wait. Wait.

Listen.

Whatever we did to you,
we did by accident.

We're your parents. Stop this insanity.

Come on, don't make us go in there.

What do you say? Huh, pal?

Do you swear to tell the truth,

the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth,

so help you God?

- I do.
- Please be seated.

Mr. Brodsky, where were you born?

Plainfield, New Jersey.

You grew up in Plainfield?
Went to school there?

Yes. And then I went on
to New York University.

And what brought you to California?

A job.

I got my doctorate in Cinema at NYU.

And my thesis,
Themeological Analysis

of the Sexual Overtones
in the Early Films of Ernst Lubitsch,

was published, and I was subsequently
offered a professorship at UCLA.

Is that where you met
Ms. Van Patten Brodsky?

No. I met her before I came to L.A.

On the way out, actually.

I had two weeks to kill
before classes began.

I thought it would be
exciting and romantic

to hitchhike across the country.

Excuse me.
Can we stop for a minute?

Is this really relevant
to my daughter's problem?

Finding out what led you
to this courtroom

is exactly your daughter's problem.

Please continue.

When did you say you met
Ms. Van Patten Brodsky?

Oh. Sorry.

I met Lucy in Harmony, lndiana,

on January 20, 1973.

I had no idea I'd be
married to her four days later.

Call out my name

And you know wherever I am--

Hi.

Remember me?

I-- I was wondering,

would it be possible for you
to give me a lift into St. Louis?

Or actually any small town
that's got an airport.

I've decided to hang up the old thumb.

I mean, it's taken me six days
to get through 3 1/2 states.

Obviously, hitchhiking is not my forte.

I'm sure you must have your reservations

about picking up strangers, but--

Do you speak English?

Excuse me, buddy.

Thank you very much.

Wait. Wait, Miss, please.
I'm freezing to death.

I'm frozen. I can't stay out
here anymore.

Won't you do me this one favor?
Look. Look at this.

I have lD. I'd show you my license,
but I don't drive.

Listen, I have a library card.
Look. Here's a picture.

I'm a teacher. You can't
get any safer than that.

Ah, come on.
Look, I'll sit in the back.

I won't make a sound.
It's starting to rain.

Could you give me a break here?

Let me in! Please! God, please!

Lady! I'll pay you!

I'll only take you
as far as the next town.

Thank you very much
for changing your mind.

I didn't pick you up before
because this car doesn't belong to me.

It belongs to my fianc�e, Bink,
and he has this thing--

- Bink?
- Well, his name is Dennis Brinkerhoff,

but everybody calls him Bink.

He's great, but he has
this thing about his car--

no food or hitchhikers allowed.

He actually had a sign
in here that said that,

but it kept falling down.

Anyway, when you said
you were a teacher,

- I figured--
- Bink likes teachers?

Uh, yeah. Sure.

- What do you do?
- Who?

- You.
- Me?

Um, nothing. I'm just engaged.

Oh. When are you getting married?

Actually, I write children's stories,

but I don't do it for a living yet.

I probably never will.
February 14th.

The 8th. The 14th. The 11th.

We're getting--

We're getting married in San Diego.

Bink's stationed there.
He's in the Navy.

I'm bringing him out his car

and I'm bringing him out me,
all at the same time.

- Do you want a cigarette?
- No, thanks.

No. Neither do l.
So what do you teach?

- Film.
- Oh. Really? Wow.

God, we didn't even have
a film department at my school.

We didn't have anything
at my school.

I went to Chatham.

That's an all-girls' school in Pittsburgh.

I'm from Pittsburgh,
so don't make any jokes.

I happen to love it there.

So, um, how do you
teach film anyway?

That's all right. It doesn't matter.

Let's go trucking, baby.

I don't truck. Thank you. Please.

- Come on--
- Please. Please.

Honey, the twins just threw up
all over your grandmother.

Oh, good.

- Thanks.
- No problem.

How you doing?

Oh, I like your belt.

Themeological Analysis
of Sexual Overtones

in the Early Films of Ernst Lubitsch?

What does that mean?

MGM, circa 1934, The Merry Widow.

We're in the bedroom of King Achmed

and his beautiful young wife Delores.

Now, King Achmed was played
by George Barbier.

He was a 65-year-old,
very rotund actor.

Well, he was getting dressed to go out.

Finally he finishes,
he walks out the door,

and there is a very young,
handsome captain of the guard.

Salutes him with a sword
and clicks his heels.

Maurice Chevalier. Dashing.

And the captain of the guards
watches him walk down the hall

and disappear around the corner,

and then he slips into
the bedroom with the queen.

All right? Now, meanwhile,
the king, he's walking along

and he looks down, he doesn't have his belt,
he doesn't have his sword.

He's gonna have to go back.

So the camera pans back with him

down the hallway, to the doors,

but stops at the door.

He goes in, the camera stays
on the closed doors, right?

Beat. Beat. What's going to happen?

Suddenly the doors fling open,

and it's him, it's the king.

He's fine. He walks out.

He's got his belt and his sword,
and he's putting them on.

Only this time, they don't fit.
They're too small.

The Lubitsch touch.

Well, that'll be all for today, class.

It must be great to be so passionate
about something.

I'll bet you're a wonderful teacher.

Oh, lllinois.

Bink made up these tapes for me.

Travel tapes. One for each state.

They're really quite helpful.

Welcome to lllinois.

How you doing, Peanuthead?

He thinks I have a small head.

Before we get too far
into The Prairie State,

better check your gas gauge.

She's probably down
to less than half a tank.

You'll find an Esso station
on the north side of the highway

at approximately 2300 hours,
if you're still on course.

Booked you a room in my name
at the Ho Jo's in Culver.

By the way, an ex-roomie
of mine from Annapolis,

Kip Harwood, lives in Culver.

Kip's a super guy.

Give him a jingle if you need anything.

Area code 217--
ah, you're right there.

You don't need the area code.
Look alive, Bink.

Okay.

His number's 555-7623.

And his wife's name is Corky.

Hell of a nice gal.

And, Luce, if they invite you over,

take them something, will you?

Spend up to 15 bucks.
Nah, make that 10.

We weren't that close, for Christ's sakes.

Only 11 more days till our wedding.

You know the Binker loves ya.

That was Bink.

- He sounded, um...
- I know. I know.

He's very--
Oh, what's the word? Um...

Uh, domineering?

I could tell you thought that.

No. You don't know him.
He's not domineering at all.

He's, um-- He likes things
a certain way, you know?

When you set the table for him,

he likes to line up
the bottoms of the knife

and the fork and the spoon perfectly.

He's-- He's very--

Compulsive.

Excuse me,

but I don't think you know
what you're talking about.

No. No. I can't wait
until we get married.

I've wanted to be a bride all my life!

I've got my veil and my gown
in the trunk--

Are you all right?

I'm fine. I'm fine.

I'm so sorry. I didn't mean
to put the Bink down.

He sounds like a terrific guy.
Really, he does.

Yes, he is. Everybody likes him.

He's great.

I mean, he knew lllinois
was The Prairie State.

He's in the Navy, serving his country.

Maybe I better get out here.

No, no. No. No. Wait. Wait, wait.

This is not your fault.
It's not your fault.

- It isn't?
- No.

I do this all the time.

Okay, okay. It's fine.

Gosh, it was really nice meeting you.

I wish you all the luck in the world.

- Thank you.
- I mean that.

Yeah, well,

I'm sorry about that
little outburst before.

I've been a little nervous lately.

Everybody goes through that

right before
they get married, you know?

It's happened to all my friends.

Also, I'm a little pooped
from the drive.

I don't like road trips that much.

But I was the only one
Bink trusted with his car.

I just didn't want you to think
I was a nut or anything.

No, no. It's just--

I don't think I should get into it.

What? Get into it.

Well, don't take this the wrong way.

but if you saw somebody
talking about how excited

they were to get married

and broke into tears
when they were telling you,

you'd just think it was
a little fishy, that's all.

Do you have a girlfriend, Albert?

No. No. Not at the moment.

You have a lot of opinions
for a guy who never had a girl.

I didn't say I nev--

I knew I shouldn't
have said anything.

Good-bye.
Thanks again for the lift.

Good luck in Hollywood.

Would you hate it a lot

if I gave you a ride
all the way to California?

Arm in Arm. That's the title.

You're sure you never read
any of these to Bink?

"Two octopuses got married

"and walked down the aisle

"arm in arm in arm in arm in arm in arm

in arm in arm in arm in arm--"

No, no, no. I liked it. Keep going.

- Really?
- Yeah.

Here's a good one.

You have to picture a blank page.

- Okay?
- Okay.

And under it is written:

"No worm, no bird,

"no cat, no dog,
no person, no house,

"no tree, no woods,
no land, no water,

"no clouds, no sky, no sun,

"nothing.

No picture."

That was fabulous. I love you.

I mean I love them.

It's excellent. Excellent.

- Really?
- I'm not kidding.

I think you could get these published.

Oh. Don't-- Don't start crying again.

Oh, Albert.

Why don't you read me another one?

- Well, okay.
- Please.

Yeah. Good.

Wait a minute! No, no, no, no!

- You can't do this to me!
- Stop! Wait!

- No, no, no!
- Stop!

- No, no, no, no!
- God, everything I own is in that car!

All my John Ford notes!

My lucky typewriter! Everything!

- Are you crazy?
- What?

Who cares about your stupid stuff?

Bink's car has been stolen.

The car he worked nine straight summers
mowing lawns to buy.

The car he trusted me
to bring out to him!

- Well, wait a minute--
- Wait a minute!

If you hadn't talked me into deviating

from Bink's safe plan,
that car would still be here.

This is not my fault.

Fine.

Tell Bink that.

Yeah. Tell him that I was getting drunk
on margaritas with a hippie

while his car was being stolen.

Tell all 245 pounds of him, fella.

Well, I'm not a hippie!

Oh! He'll never talk to me again!

You don't know this guy.

I had to prove myself for weeks

so that he'd let me drive his idiotic car!

What am I going to do?

Tell him you misplaced it.

You're really stupid, you know that?

I bet you don't talk to Bink this way.

I don't have to.
He doesn't screw anything up.

You know, I refuse
to take the blame for this.

- Forget it!
- I'd like to forget you.

- How's that?
- Fine.

Fine.

You really bug me sometimes.

Is it possible
we only met three days ago?

Impossible.

Why is it you don't have a girlfriend
at the moment?

I don't know.

I was never very comfortable
around women.

You seem to be
pretty comfortable with me.

What do you see in me anyway?

I see in you exactly
what Jimmy Stewart saw

in Jean Arthur.

In?

In Mr. Smith Goes To Washington.

Did they end up together?

I'd like to see that sometime.

Well, he knows
if she's got the painting,

she's the woman in the wheelchair.

He sees the painting.

I understand the parts
when they're not talking.

She says,

"lf you can paint, I can walk."

Keep the meter running.

- Excuse me, ma'am.
- Yes?

I'm looking for Lucy Van Patten.

She's about yea high.
She's got blonde hair.

That's the best movie I ever saw.

Who's that?

The guy from the coffee shop.

I ordered us some breakfast.

You know,

great sex always...

always makes me hungry, darling.

Lucy!

It's Bink!

Open this door!

Lucy, open this door right now!

What's he doing here?

I had to call him about his car!

I said, "Great sex makes me hungry"

right in front of him!

He wouldn't even touch me, nothing.

- I'm supposed to be a virgin.
- You are?

I'm going to be sick.

I'll handle this.

Lucy, what's going on in there?

Albert, remember,

he's trained to kill.

Who are you?

A lot's happened
since you saw Lucy last.

I asked you who you were, hippie.

Please put me down, Bink.

I'm obviously not going to hurt you.

I said put me down.

Thank you.

I'm Albert Brodsky.

And I was hitchhiking in lndiana

on my way to California,

and Lucy was kind
enough to give me a lift.

He was drowning in a rain storm!

Yes, I was, and Lucy saved my life.

And, well, to tell you the truth, Bink,

we were drawn to each other
from the very start,

and now, well,

I'm in love with her.

Are you in love with me?

Completely.

I'm calling off our engagement.

If I marry you, I don't think
either one of us would be very happy.

Lucy--

I wouldn't be a good wife to you.

I don't take orders that well.

These past few days with Albert,

I've realized that you
and I aren't very close.

You don't even know
that I write children's stories.

I'd like to be a writer one day.
I really would.

And if I married you,
I don't think I'd ever do it.

And that's how people
get sick, you know?

They never do what they really want,

and give themselves diseases.

And you know something else
that really bothers me,

as long as we're having this discussion?

Is that I never liked the fact

that your stupid car meant
more to you than I did.

Don't call my car stupid.

Good-bye, Bink.

Send my apologies
to your folks, please.

Very romantic, Mr. Brodsky.

How soon after that was Casey born?

The following winter.
December 11, 1975.

Now tell me, please, Mr. Brodsky,

how long did you teach at UCLA?

A little over four years.

Did you spend much time
with your daughter during those years?

Yes, I did. Of course I did.

I spent a lot of time with her.

What prompted you to stop teaching,
Mr. Brodsky?

When I was at UCLA,

I used to invite guest lecturers
from the film industry to my class.

One day, I invited
David Kessler, a producer.

Glad you could make it, Ken.

David, I'd like you to meet my wife.

we got to talking after class.

He was impressed
with my knowledge of film

and invited me to his house

for a screening of his latest picture.

All right. Now we can settle it.

This kid is a walking encyclopedia.

I saw that movie on the Late Show last night

with Freddie March

and that blonde dame that Gable went with.

Nothing Sacred?

That's it. Nothing Sacred.

Who else was in it? Now, listen to this.

Walter Connolly, Charles Winninger,

Sig Ruman,

"Slapsie" Maxie Rosenbloom,

former light heavyweight champion
of the world.

It would make a great
remake, wouldn't it?

Great? Well, I don't think so.

It wasn't exactly state-of-the-art
filmmaking to begin with.

Beside, it was remade, wasn't it?

Janet Leigh, Jerry Lewis, 1954.

You know, Ben Hecht
wrote that screenplay

in a four-day trip on the Super Chief
across the United States.

That's pretty good for four days.

Where did you find this kid?

What do you do?

I write children's books.

None of them have
been published yet,

so I'm doing a little typing at home

just to help out.

We also have a baby.

Well, she's not a baby anymore.

She just turned 3.

Do you have kids?

Yeah, but I'm not into parenting right now.

Oh. Well.

He said, "l think you'll like this.

It's by William Shakespeare."

Then he said "And we have
sets by Michelangelo."

And he said, "That's not bad."

"And we have a score by Mozart."

He said, "l like this. I better read this."

He said, "Now, wait a minute.
God's got this girlfriend."

Oh, that's--

That's very funny.

Hi. How are you doing?

Oh, fine.

Good.

I guess--

Hi, sweetheart. Having fun?

- Fabulous party.
- Good.

I guess going out with David,
you get to see a lot of movies.

Oh, yes. Especially
when his wife's away.

David loves screenings.
She hates them.

David's married?

They just celebrated
their 35th wedding anniversary.

Where is she?

Skiing, I think, or at a health spa
or something. I don't know.

She loves to travel,
so they're never together.

I think that's why
they've lasted 35 years.

All right, kids. Show time.

Anybody want anything
before we start?

Good night.

Good night.

I adored it, darling.
It was just wonderful.

It was gorgeous. I'll cal you tomorrow.

Okay. Good night.

Big hit. Big hit.

Thank you.

Congratulations.

Thank you.

David, thank you
very much for having us.

It was very nice to meet you.

Dinner was delicious.

Stay and have a little ice cream.

There you are.

We thought it was great.

Thanks, David.

Thanks for coming.
See you in the morning.

So what didn't you like
about the movie?

No, no. We liked it, didn't we, honey?

We liked it a lot.

Yeah, it was real cute. Adorable.

Bad liars. How refreshing.

I am really interested in your opinion.

Now, what do you think
is wrong with it?

- Well, a lot.
- For instance?

Well, for one thing,

it's cut like a drama,
and it's a comedy, right?

Yeah, it's supposed to be.

You think the problems are fixable?

Sure, if you could recut the film.

I can do anything I want.

Okay.

I think your director lost
you at least 10 good jokes.

He cuts on the punch line.

I've never seen anything like it.

And he mangled the performances.

I saw where the actors
were trying to go,

but as soon as I'm about
to be moved, he cuts.

So I'm not laughing, I'm not crying.

You know, Orson Welles said

that film is the most
emotional medium in the world.

I think he's right.

People don't like to leave
a theater feeling empty.

Oh, I'm sorry. Excuse me.

Well, it's getting late.

Listen, it's a fine film.

I see things in pictures
that no one else would ever notice.

I'm sure it'll be a big hit.

What if I turn
the picture over to you?

Do you think you can fix it for me?

Well, I'm awfully busy
right now, sir.

I'm working on a new book--

Post-war Westerns 1946 Through 1952.

It's a very complex subject.

Takes up all my free time.

You're absolutely charming.

I'm not interested
in your free time, schmuck.

I want you to come work for me.

I'll double your salary. Think about it.

I want you to start Monday morning.

Well, look, I just think
it would be very good for us.

You can't deny that.

Oh, Albert.

You continually misunderstand me.

Yes, I agree. It would be great.

We could do a lot with $500 a week.

You could buy the BMW.

We could get a housekeeper.
We could--

Which would give you time to write.

Do you know how many young directors

David Kessler
has given their start in this business?

If I do a good job for him,

Maybe someday
he'll give me a chance to direct.

That's the reason
I came out here to start with.

It is?

Come on.

Oh, hi, punky.

Hi.

Hi. Yeah.

Oh, honey, did we wake you up?

A drink of water, Daddy.

Okay.

It's just the thought of you
working for this Kessler,

a guy with a...

a wife and a girlfriend
and a mansion and--

I don't want to turn into these people.

How are we going to turn
into these people?

I don't know how it happens.

Maybe it's something
in the Perrier water.

Oh, take the job.

No, take it. You're right.

It'll be good for us.

I'm overreacting.
It's a great opportunity.

Congratulations.

Casey, too?

Oh, yes. Casey, too.

Albert worked for David Kessler
for the next two years.

He became Kessler's
right hand, his left hand,

and the son he never had.

Albert bought the BMW he wanted,

we hired a housekeeper,

and I enrolled in real estate school.

And Albert was right about Kessler.

He did offer him
a chance to direct a movie.

I remember the summer afternoon

when Kessler first brought up
An American Romance.

I tell you, it's a great story.

An older man thinks he's dying.

Then he falls in love for the first time
with a 25-year-old girl.

Finally, something to live for.

I tried to get this story
made with Bogie and Bacall.

Really?

35 years I've worked on this project.

I've had over 20 writers on it,

some of the greats.

Why don't you take a stab at it?

If you can make it work,
you can direct it.

I remember Albert's answer
as if it were yesterday.

No problem.

"No problem." What am l, nuts?

Casey, will you hurry up?
We have to leave in five minutes.

I'm coming, I'm coming.

Where's my panda?

In the living room.

How's it going?

Great, great. You got a minute?

She has to be in gym class
in 15 minutes,

and I still have to pick up
Todd and Laura. Why?

I wanted to read you something.

Good. No. I'd love to hear it.

Excuse me. What are you
doing in my purse?

I need lip gloss.

No, you don't.

- Mommy.
- Give me that.

Okay. Thank you very much.

Sorry.

Go ahead.

"lnterior of a taxi. Day. It's drizzling.

"The taxi drives down
a suburban street.

"ln the back seat

"is a beautiful young woman, Rebecca Tyler.

Her eyes are closed. The driver--"

What are you doing?

I'm hot.

Honey, put that back on, please,

and go sit in the car
for me. Thank you.

I'm listening. Her eyes are closed.

All right. Her eyes--

"The driver says,
'Where are you from??

"Rebecca says, 'Here,

"but I haven't been
home in a long time'.

"The driver says, 'What's the occasion??

She says, 'My mother's
getting married'."

That's all I have so far.

I have a terrific idea for a shot.

Start inside the taxi.

I like starting in the taxi.

But?

Well, this may be stupid,

but why don't you just
stay on the driver

and hear Rebecca's voice?

Like maybe shoot it
from her viewpoint

and looking out the window,
you know?

You could see kids playing
where she used to play

And then, when you go
to Rebecca's house,

you haven't really seen
Rebecca yet, you know?

Also, I don't know if I'd mention
why Rebecca's coming home.

Why?

Well, let the story
unfold a little more slowly.

You know it's her mother's wedding
once you're inside the house.

Oh, I don't know.
Your way's probably better.

After I drop her off,

I'm going to the market,

and then I have to go
the vacuum place,

and then I've got my class,
and then I'll be home.

Come on. Let's go.

Okay, sweetie.

There's chicken in the fridge.

Luce. Luce.

Could we work together a little
this afternoon?

I have to study for
my real estate exam.

The pressure's starting
to get to me a little.

If you could work with me
for a couple of hours,

help me get back on track.

I'd really appreciate it.

Come on.
You are the writer in the family.

We worked that afternoon

and the next afternoon

and the next...

and the next.

Finally, Albert just came out
and asked me to write with him.

When we started writing,
it was early summer.

We finished right after Christmas.

Maria, did she have her dinner?

Thank you.

Good night.

Good night.

What?

Was it good?

It's great.

How great?

You're kidding.

Can we hug?

Real hard?

I'll never love anybody in my life
the way I love you.

Kessler said our script
was one of the best he'd ever read.

We shot the movie that spring.

Suddenly, the best times of our lives
were about to change.

They turned people away
from the last two shows.

What's-his-name, the manager,

said we are breaking house records.

I never, never expected this.

Well, how's the audience?

Just like last night.

They applauded when she left.

They're laughing in all the right places.

What are you doing?

I am figuring out how much we're
going to make, dear.

8 foreign, 4 for the TV sale,

2 for ancillary rights.

Did you order me something?

Let's see. Divide that in half,

of which we have 5 percent--

Kessler's going to make
a bloody fortune out of this picture.

What's this?

For Monsieur Brodsky
from Monsieur Ballentine.

Albert Brodsky, nice to see you again.

Suddenly, Albert was
Hollywood's new darling.

Not only was the movie
a box-office smash,

but the reviews were phenomenal.

Newsweek called it a masterpiece.

The New Yorker said
it was a landmark in movie history.

And Time called Albert
the director of his generation.

What a nice guy.

Who is he?

I have no idea.

There's Albert Brodsky.

- Where?
- Right there, with the girl.

5 percent of 7.5 million.

How do you multiply on this thing?

Ah, wait, here we go.

Well, what do you think?

Any price tags on me?

No.

If you didn't know me,

would you think I was
wearing contact lenses?

No. Would you open the door?

It's kind of hot in here.

Did I tell you about the guy
I met in the commissary yesterday?

I was with David, and he said,

"I'd like you to meet Albert Brodsky,"

and the man gasped
when he heard my name.

Gee, that's great.

She's doing it again.

Stop it. I want you
to speak to us in English.

Well, we want you to.

Casey, honey,
we're going away for two weeks.

We'd like our last words
to be in English.

This is my fault.

I'm not with her enough.
She's getting me back.

She just feels
a little neglected, that's all.

Yeah, and what do we do
to make her feel better?

We go away for two weeks.

Maria, did you see
my tux shirt by any chance?

Is it packed?

Your tuxedo shirt? S�.

Good. Would you make me
a quick glass of iced tea

- before I go?
- S�.

Lucy, call the office
about a car in Cannes.

Hey, do it yourself.
I don't work for you.

What's the matter with you?

Sometimes I wish
we'd never made this stupid movie.

What?

This hasn't been
the greatest year of your life?

Yes. In some ways.

It's also been
like the worst year of my life.

What are you telling me,

you don't like your new house,

that you wrote the biggest
picture of the year,

that finally we got a little clout?

We? What we?

You're just upset because
I'm getting all the accolades.

Yeah, well, so would you be

if you did half the work
and no one mentioned your name.

Every interview I do,

I tell them you laid down the script.

Hey, pal, I did more than lay it down.

You couldn't write
a word without me.

This is like Bink's car being stolen.

It's not my fault
they're giving me all the credit.

Maybe I don't get credit
because I'm a woman.

Now you're a feminist.

Please, Lucy, don't do this to me, okay?

Why don't you just go
to Cannes without me?

What is the matter with you?

I don't like you anymore, okay?

I don't like how possessed you are

with your movie and your clothes
and your contacts and your clout.

It's enough, already!

It's boring.

I've got such a headache.

I want something else
out of my life, Albert.

I want some romance.

I want some fun.

I want to be like we used to be.

Well, I don't.

The child emancipation case
of Brodsky versus Brodsky and Brodsky

closed its second week of testimony today.

Sources close to
Lucy Van Patten Brodsky

say that Monday's
testimony will include

the name that everyone
familiar with this case

has been waiting for.

That name, of course, Blake Chandler.

More on that part of the story now

from Entertainment Editor
Rex Reed. Rex.

Thank you, Kelly.

After the phenomenal success
of An American Romance,

Albert Brodsky joined the ranks

of such superstar directors

as Francis Ford Coppola,
Peter Bogdanovich,

and Steven Spielberg.

Brodsky was, as they say, hot.

His only problem was
what to do for an encore.

He and his then-wife and coscripter,

Lucy Van Patten Brodsky,

found an obscure French novella

entitled La vision de gabrielle,

the story of an artist's model
who inspired the lmpressionists.

This, of course, became
the hit film Gabrielle.

Now, every star and would-be
star across two continents

vied for the coveted role of Gabrielle,

but Albert Brodsky
was looking for a new face.

Enter Blake Chandler.

We read her. She's not right.

Who? Oh, yeah.

Well, yes, she's
a wonderful actress.

She's not pretty enough.

Yeah. Well, I like her, too,

but she's too old for Gabrielle.

We need that young, sexy, gorgeous,

fabulous-looking, you know?

We need a face you could die from.

Listen, could I call you right back?

Albert just walked in.

Okay, thanks.

Please call if you're going to be
two hours late, okay?

We're starving.

Betsy called,
and David called twice from New York.

He's at the Sherry.

Hi, Daddy.

Hi, pumpkin.

Where have you been?
You look funny.

I was driving around, thinking,

and I stopped to get a Coke
at this hot dog stand,

and there was a girl there.

I took one look at her,
and I knew she was Gabrielle.

You're kidding.

She's incredible. She's perfect.

She is the character.

Well, great. We'll test her.

What do you want to drink?

She wouldn't test.

Ah, well, what are you
going to do, you know?

She sells hot dogs for a living.

I wouldn't exactly be upset.

I hired her, Luce.

Hi.

I hope I'm not
interrupting anything.

This is great.

I haven't had
a decent meal in months.

How long have you been working
at this hot dog place?

Oh, for about
three months, I guess.

Before that, I was going with
this guy Giorgio.

He said he wanted to marry me.

He was so sick.

I mean, just because

I wouldn't go to Acapulco
with him for the weekend,

he tries to strangle me.

You can still see
the choke marks on my neck.

See?

That's how I met
Waldo and Doug,

the guys who own
the hot dog stand.

They saved my life.

When I jumped out of the car

The night Giorgio tried to kill me,

I was right in front
of the hot dog stand.

Doug and Wally saw the whole thing.

Since I didn't have anywhere to go,

Doug and Wally and took me in.

But I need to get
out of their place soon.

They're getting married.

Waldo and Doug?

Yeah. I'm going to be
their maid of honor.

Blake, I don't know how much

Albert told you about our film, but--

Well...

he told me a little in the car,

but he kept losing
his train of thought.

He was so nervous with me driving.

Driving what?

Your Mercedes.

She drove the Mercedes?

She never drove one before.

Casita, Malcolm's on the phone.

I'll be right back.

Malcolm's her boyfriend.

Since when?

Since they did their art project
together two weeks ago.

My God, he's all she talks about.

Where have you been?

I've been working.

That's what I do. I work.

We all work.

Did I miss anything?

Finish your dinner.

Blake, do you know anything
about the period of our film,

turn-of-the-century Paris,
the lmpressionists?

Well, I know a little,

Iike the girls sort of
with their hair like this.

'ello to you.

Did I tell you?

So, what's your schedule like?

We've got a lot of work to do
and not a lot time.

I'm totally loose.

All I have to do is quit my job

and find a new place to live.

Albert felt if Blake moved in with us,

we could work with her day and night
and transform her into Gabrielle.

Frankly, I wanted to transform her
into an apartment down the street.

But I thought maybe Albert was right,

and I owed it to him to give it a try.

You see, unconsciously,
Gabrielle knows

that when Henri paints her

and his brush strokes the canvas,

in his mind, he's actually
stroking her flesh,

which he knows he can't do,

and that frustrates him
and excites her.

Now I want to be able
to feel that excitement.

I want to be able
to see you almost begin to tremble.

That's good.

I'm not happy lately.

Oh, don't start, Lucy, please.

We never used to act this way.

We never used to be distant or bicker.

I feel like my mother.

You're going to tell me
this is Blake's fault again, right?

Albert, you have to admit
ever since she came into our lives--

What?

Jesus, Mr. Defensive, I'll tell you.

She's changed our lives, okay?

How? How?

Well, we're never alone, for one thing,

and you never touch me when we are.

Well, we haven't been that romantic
in a long time.

You're telling me.

Yesterday I found a cobweb
on my diaphragm.

God, you're so sarcastic lately.

Sorry.

It's just that sexually I was hoping

that things would get
better between us,

not worse.

Sometimes I think you're in love with her.

Oh, come on. I'm in love
with Gabrielle, not Blake.

That's the way I work. I can't help it.

Wasn't I the same way

in American Romance with Rebecca?

Rebecca didn't live with us.

Do you think this girl
would be doing half as well

if we didn't work with her
day and night?

You're right. Everything's fine.

Okay? Is that what
you want me to say?

Everything is fine.

I adore you.

Oh, Albert, I missed you.

It's me.

Come in.

Hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

I'm sorry to bug you guys,

but I couldn't sleep.

I don't know how to say this,

but for the first time in my life,

I really feel like I'm part of a family.

I think you're both
such incredible people.

Lucy, I admire you so much.

I never met a woman like you.

You've got a great kid

and a beautiful house.

You're a fantastic cook

and a brilliant writer.

No.

And a good friend.

I love you both so much.

Well, that's all.

I just want you to know

how much I appreciate
everything you've done for me.

Oh, Blake.

Good night.

Good night.

I apologize.

I'm nuts.

She's a great kid.

Good night.

Cut it. Cut it, please.

Did I do something wrong?

No, you're terrific, honey. It's me.

Reggie, put a double in that 10k.

I think it's the blocking.

Let me just think for a second.

There aren't any sparks between them.

There's no heat.
There's no chemistry.

Something about it doesn't
seem too real to me.

I don't know what.

The reality is that
Gabrielle would be nude.

This is a cheat.

Nude? What do you mean nude?

Frontal nudity is an R.

I don't want to mess with the ratings.

It's the difference
between a scene that works

and a scene that doesn't work.

Come on, Lucy. It rings the bell.

Think she'd do it?

I don't know. Let me ask her.

Don't pressure her. She's just a kid.

Can I have her, please?

Works for me.

Blake, don't forget,

in the scene we're doing tomorrow,

that Gabrielle is still a little scruffy.

No nail polish, no earrings,

and she's still real intimidated--

You finished?

... by Henri. Yes, thank you.

And a little more tea, please.

Also, honey, I've been
thinking about that scene

where Gabrielle has the baby.

I want to rewrite the dialogue
before you shoot it.

Also, I think we should try it
with rain against the window.

I think it would play better
if Henri comes in a little wet.

Look, nothing's forever.

Five out of every eight marriages
end in divorce.

Now we're a statistic. So what?

I always figured we'd never last.

Do you want this, please?

Uh, no. You can have it.

Fine.

You're incredible, Lucy.

I'm a grownup, Albert.

You tell me you're in love with Blake.

What am I supposed to do, kill myself?

Throw myself off the Hollywood sign?

I'll live.

Let's not be sad.

We had nine good years.

The best.

Obviously not the best,

but we did have our good times.

Here's your sweater.

I had it dry-cleaned.

You're so thoughtful.

Mommy, when are we
going to come back?

Never.

Kiss your father good-bye.

Is it something I did?

I won't be fresh anymore.

I promise.

Oh, honey.

I have no life.

I have no husband, no home.

This isn't my street anymore.

What am I supposed to do now,

go to singles' bars,

get new clothes, look hot?

No.

That bimbo stole my husband!

They had an affair,

probably in my bed,

on my sheets.

I'm sorry.

They drank their lovers'
wine out of glasses

I stood in line to buy.

Who's going to take care of us now?

Most parents get divorced.

Really, Mom.

None of my friends' parents are married.

So what is that? Good?

This wasn't supposed
to happen to us.

Oh, where am I driving?

Come here.

My mom and I spent
that night at our corner.

The next day,
we got ourselves a little apartment.

My mom had some
of the profits of Gabrielle,

but she sold her part early
so we could afford to live.

Then, when Gabrielle came out,

it made lots of money.

My mom didn't make anything.

My dad and Blake got real rich

and moved into a mansion
in Beverly Hills.

My mom didn't want to have
anything to do with my dad.

She said he was
a worthless human being

who didn't deserve to know us.

I guess I won't lean into it.

That would be a good idea.

Now, Casey,

after your parents got divorced,

how often did you see your dad?

Whenever he could see me,
mostly on weekends.

Would you say
you remained close with your father?

No.

My dad changed a lot
once he started living with Blake.

Blake's mom moved in with them, too.

She was a real jerk.

Her name was Dotty.

She used to be a manicurist
at some hotel in Houston.

Hold on, please.

Blake, it's The New York Times.

Oh, honey, you talk to them.

- Yeah?
- You're so much better at this than me.

- No.
- Yes.

Okay.

I'll take it, Dotty.

This is Miss Chandler's
manager speaking.

Pardon me?

I didn't say anything.

Yes, you did. I heard you.

Well, then, you're hearing things.

We'll play some doubles. Bye-bye.

What's the trouble?

Lucy Junior's
making fun of me again.

I wasn't this time, I promise.

I swear to God I was
minding my own business.

You want Maria
to take you shopping?

Maria!

Yes, Mr. Albert?

I don't want to go shopping.

Well, girls, what shall
we screen tonight, huh?

Any suggestions?

Black Stallion,
please, please, please,

please, please, please, please?

That's fine. I'll go out
with Mother tonight.

Wait, wait.

Suggest something else.

How about Gabrielle?

Yuck! Again?

How about Gabrielle, Blake?

Great, boobie.

See? Now everybody's happy.

Lucy Brodsky. Is he in?

Hi, Jeff. How are you doing?

Hey.

Yeah. Great, thanks.

No, no. I'm really doing great.

It's been about a year,
but we've stayed close.

Actually, I'm writing.
I'm working on a novel.

Well, it's going pretty slowly.

That's why I was calling.

I wondered if you'd found a writer
for your new picture.

Well, I cowrote
An American Romance and Gabrielle.

Well, I don't have anything to show you

that I wrote on my own.

I never wrote alone.

Sure, sure. I understand.

Well, I can appreciate that.

Who?

I really don't think I'm the best person

to help you get to Blake Chandler.

Why don't you try her agent?

Yes, I'll mention it to Albert.

You're welcome.

Putz.

You haven't
changed your clothes all weekend.

Hi, Lucy.

Did you ask him about child support?

I forgot.

What, you didn't get it?

My accountant said he sent it.

Tell your father how much
gymnastics lessons cost

and how much the new
Blondie album is

and about the new Nikes you want.

I don't need new Nikes.

Would you like to eat
for the rest of the week?

I'm sure Miss Chandler's eating just fine.

Lucy, the money was due yesterday.

Yeah, and last month's
ran out two weeks ago.

Get it here on time, buddy,
or I'm taking you back to court.

I'm going to go watch TV.

When can I see Casey again?

Why, do you plan on being with her?

She called me six times from your
house yesterday.

You know, she doesn't
love staring at Blake

as much as you do.

You're obsessed with Blake.

No, pal. You're obsessed with Blake.

All right. I'm sorry.
You're obsessed with--

I'm surprised I can eat,

upset as I am.

Come in.

Kathy, there's something
I want to say.

I want to tell you something.

Ladies first.

What did you want to tell me?

Daddy, I've been awful mean to you,

and I'm sorry, real honest sorry.

Well, I've been mean
to you, too, kitten, and I'm sorry.

I've been mean to you, too, dear.

Will you accept our apologies?

I don't know.

Your mom and I love you so much.

You do?

Of course we do. And to prove it,

your father and l
have a surprise for you.

Your mom and I are
going to get married again.

- You are?
- Blake's disappeared,

and I realize I still love Mom.

We're going to live happily ever after, dear.

So?

Mom, I'm trying to watch TV.

Just tell me, how was Blake?

She wears too much jewelry.

Daddy buys her jewelry?

Daddy buys her everything.

What kind of jewelry?
Diamonds, what?

I don't know. They're mostly green.

Emeralds. He buys her emeralds.

He never bought me
one piece of jewelry ever.

Nothing. Not even an engagement ring.

What did you do last night?

Watched movies in the screening room,

and then Blake washed
her hair for 10 hours.

What kind of towels do they have?

Mother, will you stop it?

I am trying to watch TV.

He's turning you against me.

You don't love me anymore, either.

I love you.

I'm sorry.

What are we going to do
on New Year's Eve, pal?

I'm invited to a party.

Oh, really? Whose?

Blake and Daddy's.

Blake and Daddy's.

Hey, hey, hey! I'm not staying.

Are you okay, Mom?

Sure.

Call me.

Bye, Mom.

Great.

Hi.

Say, I was wondering,

could you give me a lift into St. Louis
or any town that's got a--

That's not funny.

Where's Casey?

She just went inside.

I just ran to the store for Blake's mom.

Would you like to come in
and have a drink?

No. I can't.

I got to get home and get dressed.

Oh, yeah? You going out?

Yeah. Big party.

Great. Well, Happy New Year, Luce.

I'll see you.

Happy New Year.

Great party, Al.

Happy New Year.

Hi.

Daddy?

- Hey, Casey, you having fun?
- Yeah.

Have you seen Blake?

She's in there.

Daddy, are you going
to dance with me?

Later, pumpkin, later.

Happy New Year!

You're just saying that

because you want me
to star in your picture.

Albert, come here, kid.

I've been looking for you.

Oh, you look beautiful, Elaine.

Blake did a fabulous job on the house.

- Thanks.
- Elaine, darling!

Hello, Gladys.

Hey, I want to talk to you.

Excuse us.

Blake's sister is quite a number, huh?

That's her mother.

You're kidding.

Lucky boy.

Listen, uh, I got to talk to you.

Come here.

You know, when you first came to me
with your Gone With The Wind musical,

I thought you had something,
my right hand to God.

Yeah?

But, uh, I listened to
Blake's tapes this afternoon.

Was that singing?

No, I don't think so.

Singing is Lisa Minnelli, Barbra,

even Julie Budd, that's singing.

But this was like, uh...

I just didn't get it.

Come on. She's taking lessons.

What are you worried about?

What have my pictures grossed,

70, $80 million?

I know what I'm doing.

Blake Chandler can do anything.

She's the actress of her generation.

Yeah, but listen to me.

Blake was terrific in Gabrielle,

a great marriage of an actress and a part.

She didn't have to say too much.

She pouted, she showed her tits.

But a singing Scarlett O'Hara she is not.

You're going too far
out on a limb with this girl.

I mean, she's got you by the balls.

You don't know what
you're talking about.

Look, I may not have talent,

I may not have a genius lQ,

but one thing I do have is gut instinct.

It told me to hire you.

It told me to give you
An American Romance.

and now it is telling me to bail out.

Wait. I thought we were
partners on this one.

Look, I played Blake's tapes
for the studio today.

They won't give up the rights.

They don't want you
to remake Gone With The Wind.

Well, then, I'll come up
with my own idea.

They don't own the Civil War.

I'm going to make this picture, David.

Then make it.

You put up the dough.
You be the producer.

You take the chances.

I'm sorry, kid. I'm out.

Come on.

10, 9, 8,

7, 6, 5...

Happy New Year.

Happy New Year.

The studio doesn't
want to make the movie.

Why?

I don't know, problems with the script,
problems with me.

They don't think
a period piece will work.

So, let them go. Who cares?

Let them go?

We don't have any financing.
We don't have a script.

I knew you'd do something
to ruin my New Year's Eve.

You can never just be happy, can you?

You've always got to do something
to bring me down.

Do you have to be so
goddamn narcissistic?

You know how much
this movie means to me.

I've wanted to play Scarlett O'Hara
ever since junior high.

And I've already written half my songs.

I know. I know.

What am I supposed to do?

Fix it, baby.

I'll see you inside.

For auld lang syne

Let old acquaintance be forgot

I started spending

more and more time with Maria,

especially once my mom
started writing her book.

She wrote nonstop
for the next six months.

Where was your father all this time?

Making his movie, Atlanta.

I was only on the set of Atlanta once.

That was more than enough.

Excuse me. Make way.

Make sure the reverend
has got his glasses.

I don't think we've got enough flies.

These are dead men
in 100-degree heat.

Albert, we've already got
every fly in the state working.

What's that woman
in the carriage wearing?

What carriage?

Back there.
What color is she wearing?

Pink? She can't wear pink.
Blake's wearing pink.

Jesus, Albert. Who's going to notice
what color she's wearing?

No one's going to even
notice the carriage.

Unconsciously, the audience will know
the scene is just a little bit off.

Trust me, I know what I'm doing.

Uh, the wardrobe truck isn't here.

Well, we'll just have to wait for it.

Okay. Okay, Albert.

This is why your budget has gone

from $9 million to $22 million

in nine weeks.

You've have $40,000 worth of extras

Iying around for two days
while you wait for the perfect sunset.

And now you want to change wardrobe

that nobody will ever see!

You're turning on me now, too, huh?

First the cameraman,
then the art director.

I don't know what's
starting to happen here.

Calm down. Calm down.

I sunk every dime I have
in this goddamn picture.

- I know that.
- Every dime.

Albert, I know. I know.

Oh, God, I need a haircut.

Look, just change her dress, huh?

Do that for me, please.

Sure, sure.

Amy!

Run down there and throw a shawl
over that lady in the carriage.

What carriage?

The sun is going down. It's perfect.

Get them into positions.

This is what we've been waiting for.
Let's do it!

Let's do it, people!
Take your places, please!

Take your places on the double!

Places, please!

Come on.

Ready for rehearsal, Miss Amanda?

In a minute.

I don't need a rehearsal.
Let's shoot it.

All right, stand by, people.

This will be picture.

No drinking, no talking,
no laughing, no sneezing.

Leave the horses alone.

Keep the blood showing.
Let the blood show.

All right,
ladies and gentlemen, this will be it.

Quiet, please! We're rolling!

Rolling!

Speed!

Background action.

Horses. Smoke.

Flies.

And action.

"For as much as it
have pleased Almighty God

"in His wise providence
to take out of this world

"the souls of our deceased brothers,

"we therefore commit
their bodies to the ground.

"Earth to earth,

"ashes to ashes,

"dust to dust,

"looking for the general resurrection

"in the last day

"and the life of the world to come

through our Lord Jesus Christ."

Come, Amanda,

they need you.

Amanda?

No more.

No more bodies.

I can't take it anymore.

You mustn't say that, Amanda.

This civil war

Ain't gonna get me down

I'm movin' my act

To a brand-new town

This belle got burned in old Atlanta

I'm gonna find myself
a brand-new Santa

Cut!

All right, get in here.

Get the flies back.

Darling, I'm the one
who's supposed to say cut.

But, darling, apparently,
I'm the one that knows

this scene isn't working.

Somebody get me a Tab.

If you want to yell at me, fine.

But don't do it in front of the crew.

It undermines my authority.

I thought this was
a Brodsky-Chandler production,

or don't I have a right to an opinion?

Aren't I as bright as the great Lucy?

You don't always
have to put Lucy down.

We're losing the sun, folks.

Forget the sun!

This Tab is warm. Damn it, Dotty!

I'm sorry. It felt cold.

Well, it isn't.

For a thousand dollars a week, Mother,

I think you can learn the difference
between warm and cold.

Give me the script.

If we don't get the shot right now,

we're going to lose another whole day.

I know.

What are you doing?

The reason this scene doesn't work

is because the lines
before the song don't work.

They're too down.

Amanda never has
anything funny to say.

Nobody in this movie ever
has anything funny to say!

That's because it's not a comedy.

Okay, that's a wrap, folks!

God damn it, it's my money too!

No, it is my money.

It is my life. It is my career, honey.

You will go on and do lots of things.

Not me. I will be buried with this.

You might as well throw me
in that grave and bury me.

Blake and my dad stayed together
until the movie opened.

The night of the big premiere,

Blake took off with her limo driver,
and we never saw her again.

Atlanta lost more money

than any movie
in the history of movies,

or something like that.

Right, Dad?

My father had to declare--

what do you call it
when you have no money?

Bankruptcy?

Yeah. Bankruptcy.

And what was your mother doing
while all this was going on?

Finishing her book
and getting it published.

Your mother's novel became
a big success, didn't it?

Yeah, it did.

Then it was like
she became a new person.

Who did she become?

Lucy Van Patten Brodsky.

Hi, babe. How are you doing?

Who, me? I'm great.

Hot as a pistol and free as a bird.

How's the book going this week?

That's great.

I'll take it.

Listen, honey, I'd love to talk,

but I'm in the middle of a meeting.

That's okay.

You, too.

Finished.

Somebody pick up Casey
from the jerk's house?

I just did. She's right over there.

I had your car washed,
and your facial's at 5.

How did Albert look?

Bad. When I left, he was reading
Pauline Kael's review of Atlanta.

Again?

Do you have anything cold to drink?

I don't work here.

Sorry.

Hi, Gorge. How are you doing?

Give me a kiss.

Do you love me a lot?

Luce?

Tonight Show, 1 8th.

Perfect.

I thought we're going
to Palm Springs on the 1 8th.

You want me not to do
The Tonight Show?

Where's my lunch?

It just arrived.

Tell Her Highness

I'm going across the street
to the bookstore.

See if they've got me in the window.

Tell them who you are.

She's so moody lately.

You should have heard
what the little wisenheimer

called me yesterday.

Maybe I should take her to a shrink.

Maybe I should take me to a shrink.

You've never looked better in your life.

Never.

I'm feeling great, I am.

Who's got a cigarette?

...director Albert Brodsky.

What's that?

What?

The news. Turn it up.

Brodsky collapsed in his Bel Air home

and was rushed to Wilshire Memorial.

The 38 year-old film director
achieved notoriety

with his first film, An American Romance,

but was best known for his disastrous

$35 million megaflop, Atlanta.

What happened? Is he dead?

Who are you?

I'm his wife.

What happened?

Cardiac arrest.

He-- He had a heart attack?

He's 38 years old.

1/8 grain of morphine, Colleen.

Yes, doctor.

Can you-- can you hear me?

Oh, Albert.

God, you've got to get better.

We can't end like this, huh?

I never--

I always thought we--

Oh, God.

Turn the oxygen up to 4 liters.

I could never bring myself
to tell you this before,

but I saw Atlanta.

Albert!

I knew what you were going for. I did.

I thought you had some of
the most beautiful moments

I'd ever seen on film.

Really.

What are you doing?

Is he going to die?

I'd say from the looks of his EKG,

not for another 40 years.

Your husband didn't have
a heart attack, Mrs. Brodsky.

He had an anxiety attack.

From that moment on,

things got worse and worse,

especially for me.

My mom refused to have
anything to do with my dad.

It got to the point

where they wouldn't
even speak to each other.

Daddy wants to know--

I told you never to mention his name.

You-know-who wants to know
if he can see me

on Saturday instead of Friday.

Out of the question.

Tell him if he can't stick to the rules,
he can't see you.

Will you tell your mother

I've got unemployment on Friday?

Can't she bend a little bit?

Jesus, what's the big deal?

Tell your father the big deal

is that he has to start
working around me!

I'm calling the shots now.

Tell your mother
I'm not one of her flunkies.

She can go f--

Tell your father he just lost
visiting privileges for a month.

Maybe I should skip
seeing you this week.

You sure?

Yeah, it'll be easier.

Well, good luck in your new home.

Yeah. You, too.

Okay, guys.

Don't soil it, all right?

We're talking gray flannel here.

You get my drift?

Leon, sweetheart, gently, ever so gently.

I'll love you forever.

I couldn't believe it.

My mom bought my dad's house,

and my dad moved into
a place he could afford.

How long can a meeting go on,
for Christ's sake?

I've been trying
to reach him for days.

I don't believe this. Hello?

Casey, come here.

I want you to say you're
Robert Redford's secretary.

I think my agent's trying to avoid me.

Okay, it's ringing. Come here.

Dad.

Sound like an adult.

Hi. Is he in?

It's Robert Redford calling.

Hello, Sandy?

Hello, Sandy? It's me, Albert.

Why are you doing this to--

Oh, God.

No, I'm all right. I'm all right.

You know, you're starting to look
more and more like your mother.

How is your mother?

Okay.

She ever talk about me?

Well, not too much anymore.

I mean, I think she still hates you,

but she's been real busy lately.

They're making her book
into a movie, you know.

Oh, yeah? That's great.

She doesn't think I'm still
hung up on Blake, does she?

I mean, you know I'm not.

You could tell your mom if you wanted to.

I wouldn't mind.

Boy, this looks fabulous.

Where'd you learn to make enchiladas?

From Maria.

Maria.

How is Maria, anyway?

Fine.

Does she ever ask about me?

Hey, Case,

what do you think of your old man?

Be honest.

Daddy, you know, for a long time,

you didn't talk to me so much
because you were always so busy.

And now it's like you want me
to be your best friend or something.

It's not fair.

Fair? You want to talk fair?

Two Academy Award nominations,
and look at me.

I can't even get arrested.

You always read
when you eat with your mom?

I don't eat with my mom.

What are you reading?

Tomorrow.

Can I see it, please?

"Erica James celebrated
her 1 5th birthday

by screwing
the entire junior varsity basketball team."

What is this?

A book. May I have it, please?

No. I don't want you
reading books like this.

You can't tell me what to do.

Oh, yes I can. I'm your father.

No, you're not.

You don't pay child support anymore.

Mom, do you still love Daddy?

Why are you doing this to me?

This is the first chance
I've had to relax all week.

I'm sorry.

Want to go out to a movie
tonight or something?

Get that, will you, baby?

Say I'm not here.

Hello?

No, this is Casey, her daughter.

No, she's out.

Okay, I'll tell her.

Bye.

That was your publisher.

She wanted you to know

your book just reached number 1.

You're kidding.

I wrote the number 1
bestseller in the country?

My God, I'm huge.

Oh, God.

Get right in here. You are going to die.

Where's Howard?

Well, tell him to come in here.

Maria! Come in here.

Oh, wait. Where's lnez?

- Who's lnez?
- She's the cook.

I hired a cook. You hate my cooking.

No, I don't.

I just got a call from New York.

He said It Was Going To Be Forever

is number 1!

What is?

Her book.

Congratulations.

Thank you very much.

God, Lucy, that's super.

I thought you'd all want to know.

You were here
when it was happening.

Well, not you, lnez, you're new.

But you'll be here for the next one.

Oh, thank you, ma'am.

You're very welcome.

Thanks for coming in.

You don't have to stay, thanks.

Who is it?

It's me, Albert.

It's not your visiting day.

I know. Can I come in?

Hi.

What do you want?

The place looks really nice.

Great.

Hey, I read your book finally.

It's very well written.

It had some very funny things in it.

I laughed a lot.

I cried, too.

Well, I did, when they broke up.

I kept thinking back in the beginning

when they were young and on the road

and how tragic everything turned out.

It's a good book, Lucy. It really is.

Thank you. What do you want?

I mean, you did bury me there,

but thank God
you changed the names.

It wasn't to protect
the innocent, I assure you.

I know you could care less,
but I want you to know

that I realize how nuts
I was there with Blake.

I didn't know if I was coming or going.

I want you to know how sorry I am.

I feel badly about the way
I treated you and Casey.

So do we.

I realized today I don't even know
my own daughter anymore.

Gee, maybe you should have
thought about all of this

when you were lighting
Sarah Bernhardt's cigarette.

Are we ever going to be able
to talk like people, Lucy?

I don't think so.

Look, I've got to get back to work.
I've got a deadline.

Need any help?

No, thanks.

Okay, okay. I'm going.

Could I just say hello to Case? I--

We had a fight, and l'd
like to make up with her.

I'd like to apologize.

She's in her room.

Can I go up?

- She's not up there.
- Yes, she is.

Casey!

Well, she probably fell asleep
watching television.

Casey!

Well, I thought I saw her here earlier.

What do you mean,
you thought you saw her?

Don't yell at me.

Now where is she?
She always tells me when she goes out.

God, what if she's been kidnapped?

I should get a burglar alarm.

I should get one of those
armed guards to live in.

I keep getting these weird letters
from people all over the country.

- Lucy, where's Casey?
- I don't know.

Ask Maria.

Where's Maria?

Mr. Albert, Miss Lucy.

Maria, is Casey here?

Yes.

She said she told you she was coming.

She did?

I don't remember.
What's she doing here?

She's sleeping.

Why is she here? I don't get it.

I bring her here sometimes
when you travel with your book.

She likes to play with my kids.

Well, I'm taking her home.
She doesn't have to stay tonight.

Let her sleep, Miss Lucy.

She needs a rest.

Let the child alone.

She's okay.

She's sleeping good.

You interested in having a drink?

- No. I'm depressed.
- Well, I'm going to have one.

- Bye.
- Bye.

Come on. One drink.

I can't believe we did this.

You're not sorry, are you?

I don't know yet.

It's so weird being with you again.

And it's not weird at all.

You know what I mean?

Want me to be honest with you?

I just never remember it
being this great.

I don't know who you've been with, but--

Nobody.

Nobody?

Well, at first I just couldn't. I--

And then, you may recall,
I put on a few extra pounds.

Lately, I've just been too busy.

Sometimes I can't believe
how things have changed.

Casey told me they're making
your book into a movie.

Yeah, that's another thing.

You know, they wanted it,
like, yesterday.

Well, how far into it are you?

I'm almost finished.

Of course, I've been almost finished
for the last month.

- Who's going to direct it?
- I don't know.

We haven't decided yet.

Well, who are you leaning towards?

Nobody yet. I--

I don't want to talk about this now.

I think I'd be good for the job, Lucy.

I know your point of view, obviously,

and at one time, I think you thought
I was a pretty good director.

If I remember correctly, you were one
of the few who appreciated Atlanta.

I think I'm perfect for the job.

How do you feel about it?

Get out of my bed!

How can I let him do this to me?

You are a repulsive human being!

You are the reason women hate men!

I knew were you low.
I knew you were mean and insincere.

I had no idea
how inhumane you could be!

Crawling into my bed, using me!

You look like a rat!

I want you out of my house!

You're all confused.

I wanted to make love to you.

I've fantasized about it, Lucy, I swear.

What, do you think
I came here last night

hoping that we'd make love
so that I could ask you for a job?

Are you nuts?
I swear to God I'm innocent!

I'm calling the police.

I'm sweating. Oh, my God!

I feel like Henry Fonda in The Wrong Man.

I'm going to throw you out that window!

God help me! You lunatic!

I wish I'd never met you.

I should've let you
drown on that highway!

I'd be happy today,
living in Pittsburgh.

Nobody's happy living in Pittsburgh.

I hate you!

You should stop hating me for a minute

and take a look at yourself, Miss Macho.

Miss Genius Perfect Person
who has no idea

where her 9-year-old daughter is sleeping.

Oh, well, it didn't seem
to bother you earlier, worm.

No, you were too busy getting me drunk

so you could screw me
and ask for a job, weren't you?

How about dealing with the fact
that your 9-year-old daughter

would rather sleep at the maid's
than in the same house with you?

Yeah. You turned out to be quite
a mother, didn't you, Lucy?

You got a secretary to take her to school.

You got a secretary
to take her to dance class.

You got Maria to put her to bed,
the cook to give her breakfast.

Who gives her love?
Yuki the gardener?

Get off of me! Get off of me!

Albert, put me down!
Put me down!

Don't you ever criticize me
as a parent!

Why, goddess? Because a man
hurts a woman once,

does that allow her to become a barracuda
for the rest of her life?

Holier than thou from that moment on!

Don't you take responsibility
for anything in your own life?

You want to know something, Lucy?

Seeing what you've turned into
just breaks my heart!

I'll break your heart!
You want to know how, Albert?

I'm never going
to let you see your daughter again.

How's that for a broken heart, pal?

This child isn't going to know
she has a father after today.

Take a good look,
because she's out of your life forever.

- Oh, yeah?
- What are you guys doing?

Maria, call the police!

Let go of her!
I'm taking her away from you!

Try it, and I'll have you
arrested for kidnapping!

Oh, you're deep in, baby!

Don't call me baby!

Leave me alone!

They let go of me.
My mom started to cry.

My dad got in his car and drove off.

I was just standing there all by myself.

That's when I ran away,

and that's how come I ended up here.

I have no further questions.

You may step down now, Casey.

Can I say something else,
though, before I go?

Your Honor?

Sure.

I'd like to be honest with you, okay?

Okay.

The reason I went to a lawyer
to divorce my parents

is because I can't take living
with either one of them anymore.

And please, don't switch
custody around or anything,

because that won't help.

I want you to know I don't expect my mom

to be a person who vacuums all day,

bakes cookies for me
when I get home from school.

And I don't expect my dad to be some kind
of real understanding person,

puts me on his knee,
wants to take me fishing all the time.

But my mom and dad are just too mixed up
for anybody to be around.

I'm just a kid,

and I don't know
what I'm doing sometimes.

But I think you should know better
when you're all grown up.

I think you should know how to act,

how to treat people.

I think if you once loved someone
enough to marry them,

you should at least be nice to them,

even if you don't love them anymore.

And I think if you have a child,

you should treat that child
like a human being and not like a pet.

Not like you treat your dog or something.

You know, when you have a dog,

sometimes you forget he's there.

Then when you get lonely,
suddenly you remember him,

and you remember how cute he is

and stuff, and you kiss him a lot.

But then the next day
when you're busy again,

you don't notice him.

That's how I've been treated
for the past four years.

You don't treat your kid like your dog.

It's not right.

I want to live
with Maria Hernandez...

full time.

She said I could. I want you to let me.

I think I'll be okay without
a real mother and father.

I have been for a long time.

That's it.

Hi, Henry. Hi, Lindabelle.

- Hi, Miss Lucy.
- Hi, missus.

Hi.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Mom, how come you're here today?

Oh, God, is it your visiting day?

Well, I think so.
You were here last weekend, weren't you?

Was it last week?

I'm sorry.

Gee-- Oh, God.

Maria here?

No. She's working.

Well, I'll see you guys.

I can't believe I did this.
I'm really sorry.

Listen, we were about to get
something to eat.

Would you like to come along?

No. No, no. You two go ahead.

Why don't you, Mom?

- You don't mind?
- No, I don't mind.

Should I follow you in my car?

We can take mine.

Okay. Great.

Bye, Theresa!

- I'll get in the back.
- Oh, okay.

When did you get this?

A couple of weeks ago.

I like it.

Watch this. Now?

Okay, go.

Hey, great.

Looks crowded.

I'll go inside and check it out.

You want a cigarette?

No, thanks.

Neither do l.

They can take us!

Wait right there. I'm gonna park.

Well, what's everybody
going to have?

I don't know.

I'm having a hamburger, fries,

a Coke, and maybe a salad.
How about you, Luce?