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1
00:02:28,595 --> 00:02:31,530
THE THINGS WE HAVE IN COMMON
2
00:02:31,565 --> 00:02:34,295
l'm not that weird.
3
00:02:34,334 --> 00:02:39,636
Some of my ideas might sound
a little weird, but...
4
00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:43,006
She's obsessed!
5
00:02:43,043 --> 00:02:46,342
Go ahead and nod,
but she is.
6
00:02:46,379 --> 00:02:50,247
What happens to unworn clothes?
7
00:02:50,283 --> 00:02:52,478
She goes crazy every season.
8
00:02:52,519 --> 00:02:54,111
Her clothes won't fit!
9
00:02:54,154 --> 00:02:58,090
Wool is made from elastic fibers,
it shrinks.
10
00:02:58,124 --> 00:03:01,924
She didn't gain weight,
her clothes shrunk!
11
00:03:01,962 --> 00:03:04,624
Chocolate is not fattening.
12
00:03:04,664 --> 00:03:07,565
lt helps you lose weight.
13
00:03:07,601 --> 00:03:11,833
The energy makes you more active
and you burn fat.
14
00:03:11,872 --> 00:03:15,433
She pigs out on chocolate
every night.
15
00:03:15,475 --> 00:03:18,638
lt's my fault she gains weight.
16
00:03:18,678 --> 00:03:21,272
I put too much oil on her salad!
17
00:03:21,314 --> 00:03:24,112
Pictures change.
18
00:03:24,150 --> 00:03:26,209
At first you hate yourself.
19
00:03:26,253 --> 00:03:29,279
Months later you realize
you've changed.
20
00:03:29,322 --> 00:03:31,688
What are you like in pictures?
21
00:03:31,725 --> 00:03:34,558
You are what you are!
22
00:03:34,594 --> 00:03:37,791
A few months later,
you are what you were.
23
00:03:37,831 --> 00:03:38,991
Big deal!
24
00:03:39,032 --> 00:03:42,627
Pictures improve with time.
25
00:03:42,669 --> 00:03:45,638
Okay, so we get older...
26
00:03:45,672 --> 00:03:48,539
But I don't want to face that.
27
00:03:48,575 --> 00:03:52,511
Life is too short to waste
on mistakes.
28
00:03:52,546 --> 00:03:56,277
You have to plan everything to a ''T''.
29
00:03:56,316 --> 00:04:01,413
Life is too short to waste
on planning everything.
30
00:04:01,454 --> 00:04:03,854
You gotta be flexible!
31
00:04:03,890 --> 00:04:07,656
The only way to keep control
is to be organized.
32
00:04:07,694 --> 00:04:09,662
The only way to keep control
is to be unorganized.
33
00:04:09,696 --> 00:04:13,188
The only way to keep control...
34
00:04:13,233 --> 00:04:16,031
- is to be unorganized.
- You're right.
35
00:04:16,069 --> 00:04:17,969
I lost my lighter.
36
00:04:18,004 --> 00:04:23,135
Being jealous means you're afraid
to lose the other person.
37
00:04:23,176 --> 00:04:26,873
Being jealous means you don't trust
the other person.
38
00:04:26,913 --> 00:04:30,178
So when you're jealous,
it's love!
39
00:04:30,216 --> 00:04:34,676
lf there's no trust,
you're not in love!
40
00:04:36,323 --> 00:04:39,258
THEY DON'T MAKE LOVE
LIKE THEY USED TO
41
00:04:57,043 --> 00:05:00,308
- When did you find out?
- At the video store.
42
00:05:00,347 --> 00:05:04,681
I pick a movie and Andrea says
we've seen it.
43
00:05:04,718 --> 00:05:07,846
Maybe he saw it, but I didn't!
44
00:05:07,887 --> 00:05:12,824
He starts making up crap,
saying someone lent him that movie.
45
00:05:12,859 --> 00:05:16,192
Then I remembered
we never saw that movie
46
00:05:16,229 --> 00:05:18,163
because it was playing at Mignon.
47
00:05:18,198 --> 00:05:21,793
- Who takes your tickets at Mignon?
- Silvia, his ex!
48
00:05:21,835 --> 00:05:23,735
Of course he denies everything.
49
00:05:23,770 --> 00:05:27,831
He didn't go there to see the movie,
he went there to see...
50
00:05:27,874 --> 00:05:30,172
- The sex bomb.
- So, I decided.
51
00:05:30,210 --> 00:05:32,678
There is a lack of trust here!
52
00:05:32,712 --> 00:05:36,011
So I go: ''What else
has he hid from me?''
53
00:05:36,049 --> 00:05:39,644
He goes: ''I hate jealousy.
Change or it's over.''
54
00:05:39,686 --> 00:05:43,588
So I go: ''l'm not changing,
it's over.''
55
00:05:43,623 --> 00:05:47,184
Since he's a wimp,
he gave in.
56
00:05:47,227 --> 00:05:50,685
Love means leaving room
for mistakes.
57
00:05:50,730 --> 00:05:51,719
No.
58
00:05:51,765 --> 00:05:54,256
Love means never having to say:
''I told you so''.
59
00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:56,029
Well, I told him so.
60
00:05:56,069 --> 00:05:58,094
Ex's are just that: Ex!
61
00:06:02,308 --> 00:06:04,003
Andrea.
62
00:06:04,044 --> 00:06:08,811
We said we either get married
or break up.
63
00:06:08,848 --> 00:06:10,941
So we broke up.
64
00:06:10,984 --> 00:06:15,216
But there's one thing I don't get.
65
00:06:15,255 --> 00:06:17,120
Who broke up with who?
66
00:06:17,157 --> 00:06:22,220
lf I broke up with you,
it's my own fault.
67
00:06:22,262 --> 00:06:25,663
But if you broke up with me...
68
00:06:25,699 --> 00:06:27,098
Pick up the phone!
69
00:06:27,133 --> 00:06:29,431
l'm not calling to argue.
70
00:07:19,886 --> 00:07:22,047
There's someone in here!
71
00:07:23,623 --> 00:07:25,853
lt's gonna be a while!
72
00:07:39,472 --> 00:07:41,531
l'm just here to say bon voyage.
73
00:07:41,574 --> 00:07:46,136
Mother says no more girl scout trips
because it's time to mature.
74
00:07:46,179 --> 00:07:51,708
I need to travel and have
my own experiences.
75
00:07:53,019 --> 00:07:55,613
Guys, let's go!
76
00:07:55,655 --> 00:07:58,283
Proceed, I don't want to delay you.
77
00:07:58,324 --> 00:08:00,656
You didn't see me here!
78
00:08:11,004 --> 00:08:13,336
Hello, Mother.
Ciao.
79
00:08:13,373 --> 00:08:16,035
No, everything is fine.
80
00:08:16,075 --> 00:08:19,135
I couldn't find them.
81
00:08:19,179 --> 00:08:22,637
Quit going ballistic,
the train was late!
82
00:08:22,682 --> 00:08:25,515
I know, but...
83
00:08:25,552 --> 00:08:27,076
I have a wicked idea!
84
00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:30,214
I can get an lnter Rail ticket.
85
00:08:30,256 --> 00:08:34,090
l'll travel Europe and have
my own experiences.
86
00:08:36,129 --> 00:08:37,824
I won't ruin your vacation!
87
00:08:40,266 --> 00:08:41,756
l'm almost 15!
88
00:08:41,801 --> 00:08:44,668
Good job, Martina.
You act older.
89
00:08:44,704 --> 00:08:48,162
I know, l'm mature for my age.
90
00:08:48,208 --> 00:08:51,006
But call me Meggy.
91
00:08:51,044 --> 00:08:53,342
Martina sounds old!
Thanks.
92
00:08:53,379 --> 00:08:56,507
Meggy isn't even short
for Martina.
93
00:08:56,549 --> 00:08:58,141
Like I know!
lt's way unfair.
94
00:09:01,020 --> 00:09:04,183
Granny said that Mother said
95
00:09:04,224 --> 00:09:07,250
I could stay at your house
since you got dumped
96
00:09:07,293 --> 00:09:09,193
and weren't going anywhere.
97
00:09:09,229 --> 00:09:11,026
What? I dumped him!
98
00:09:11,064 --> 00:09:15,023
I made all the decisions, as usual.
99
00:09:15,068 --> 00:09:18,936
Can't they mind their own business?
100
00:09:18,972 --> 00:09:22,931
You don't have a book, do you?
101
00:09:22,976 --> 00:09:24,739
l'm not that stereotypical!
102
00:09:24,777 --> 00:09:28,372
- I have a book.
- Take another one.
103
00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:34,186
Give me the one I have to read
for summer homework.
104
00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,949
Sure!
105
00:09:35,989 --> 00:09:39,390
That one about teen angst...
106
00:09:39,425 --> 00:09:42,223
- Young Holden?
- No...
107
00:09:42,262 --> 00:09:44,321
- Young Turles?
- No...
108
00:09:44,364 --> 00:09:47,128
- Young Werther?
- Yes, that one.
109
00:09:47,166 --> 00:09:48,929
They still make kids read those?
110
00:09:53,473 --> 00:09:57,375
- 285!
- Come on!
111
00:09:57,410 --> 00:09:59,640
The German version is in there too.
112
00:10:01,147 --> 00:10:06,084
I lived with a guy for 8 years
who used his mother's bank account!
113
00:10:06,119 --> 00:10:10,317
I had to thank his mother too
for gifts he got me.
114
00:10:10,356 --> 00:10:13,723
He couldn't make a decision!
115
00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:19,027
When you ask him a question
you have to answer it too.
116
00:10:19,065 --> 00:10:23,525
How could I diet when he always
cooked me things?
117
00:10:24,504 --> 00:10:28,463
- You said we'd split it!
- No, this is the last piece.
118
00:10:28,508 --> 00:10:30,066
This is the Peace Pie.
119
00:10:30,109 --> 00:10:34,011
Andrea made it whenever we argued.
120
00:10:34,047 --> 00:10:35,981
Then we'd make up.
121
00:10:36,015 --> 00:10:38,040
There's ice cream in the freezer.
122
00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:44,053
This is good because
of its secret ingredient.
123
00:10:44,090 --> 00:10:45,921
Actually there are two.
124
00:10:45,959 --> 00:10:47,927
Ginger and cinnamon.
125
00:10:47,961 --> 00:10:49,792
He couldn't even decide on that.
126
00:10:49,829 --> 00:10:54,391
- There's only one secret ingredient.
- Got a picture of Andrea?
127
00:10:54,434 --> 00:10:56,766
ln the trash.
128
00:10:56,803 --> 00:10:59,966
Under there, in the trash.
129
00:11:00,006 --> 00:11:04,909
Are you nuts?
You trashed 8 years of pictures!
130
00:11:04,944 --> 00:11:07,037
Only where you could see him.
131
00:11:19,859 --> 00:11:22,419
The world passed right by us!
132
00:11:22,462 --> 00:11:26,364
People got married and the cute guys
came out of the closet.
133
00:11:26,399 --> 00:11:30,893
lt's not my fault the train broke
and I was late!
134
00:11:30,937 --> 00:11:35,169
Scout camp could have been
a major educational experience!
135
00:11:35,208 --> 00:11:37,972
You can't dump someone after 8 years!
136
00:11:38,011 --> 00:11:40,138
Especially at your age!
137
00:11:40,179 --> 00:11:44,946
You wanna be free
but you're too young.
138
00:11:44,984 --> 00:11:49,614
When you are free,
you're too old to enjoy it!
139
00:11:59,332 --> 00:12:03,996
As if I would go with you
and those wrinkly old farts!
140
00:12:04,037 --> 00:12:08,303
As it is, our hometown reeks!
141
00:12:09,842 --> 00:12:12,606
You don't trust me.
142
00:12:12,645 --> 00:12:17,776
Sibilla Balzarro went to the States
by herself when she was 1 3!
143
00:12:19,652 --> 00:12:22,018
Yes, I would jump off a bridge
if she did!
144
00:12:22,055 --> 00:12:25,024
All teenagers copy each other.
145
00:12:25,058 --> 00:12:29,188
We lack major equilibrium,
I didn't choose to be your daughter!
146
00:12:29,228 --> 00:12:31,924
You chose to be my mother!
147
00:12:31,964 --> 00:12:36,367
Your daughter needs to go on vacation
with her friends.
148
00:12:36,402 --> 00:12:39,599
lf you won't take her
because you're selfish,
149
00:12:39,639 --> 00:12:42,506
then l'll take my niece.
150
00:12:42,542 --> 00:12:45,636
Why?
Why can't l go to scout camp?
151
00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:49,443
You know what l'm like?
152
00:12:49,482 --> 00:12:51,609
What are you like?
153
00:12:51,651 --> 00:12:55,246
Martina is staying with me.
154
00:12:55,288 --> 00:12:57,119
lt's Meggy, not Martina.
155
00:12:57,156 --> 00:13:00,648
Whatever.
Have a nice trip.
156
00:13:00,693 --> 00:13:03,560
Your mother is terrible!
157
00:13:03,596 --> 00:13:06,258
l have to live with her all year.
158
00:13:06,299 --> 00:13:08,290
How can we be sisters?
159
00:13:13,473 --> 00:13:15,703
l'll take you, if you want.
160
00:13:15,741 --> 00:13:17,299
Where are these girl scouts?
161
00:13:18,911 --> 00:13:22,972
l'm not waiting for Andrea's call.
162
00:13:23,015 --> 00:13:25,848
My friends are in Greece.
163
00:13:25,885 --> 00:13:28,820
Nice, especially since
you're taking classical studies.
164
00:13:28,855 --> 00:13:30,982
Where exactly?
165
00:13:31,023 --> 00:13:33,389
los, in the Cyclades.
166
00:13:37,363 --> 00:13:39,558
Beaches, hot sun...
167
00:13:41,601 --> 00:13:43,694
Sorry, l can't.
168
00:13:43,736 --> 00:13:48,901
l break out in a rash
if l get too much sun.
169
00:13:53,279 --> 00:13:55,873
Stop looking at me like that.
170
00:13:55,915 --> 00:13:58,042
Don't you dare cry!
171
00:14:14,367 --> 00:14:17,359
Stefy!
Over here.
172
00:14:19,105 --> 00:14:22,165
Everyone's feet stinks!
173
00:14:22,208 --> 00:14:24,574
There's fresh air over here.
174
00:15:03,416 --> 00:15:05,748
l love you, Auntie!
175
00:15:05,785 --> 00:15:08,310
That's sweet of you.
176
00:15:08,354 --> 00:15:11,915
Too bad we never hang out,
you're a nice person.
177
00:15:11,958 --> 00:15:14,654
No, l'm not.
178
00:15:14,694 --> 00:15:17,288
l'm like a total liar.
179
00:15:17,330 --> 00:15:21,994
l try to tell the truth,
but something else comes out.
180
00:15:22,034 --> 00:15:25,902
lt's because of your mother!
181
00:15:36,682 --> 00:15:39,515
l missed the train on purpose.
182
00:15:39,552 --> 00:15:42,077
l'm mature enough
to be on my own.
183
00:15:42,121 --> 00:15:44,521
Never mind.
184
00:15:44,557 --> 00:15:47,219
Once you see your friends
it won't be a lie anymore.
185
00:15:47,260 --> 00:15:49,751
Sweet dreams.
186
00:15:49,795 --> 00:15:52,389
l sort of like told another lie...
187
00:15:52,431 --> 00:15:55,764
But l can't tell you,
'cause you'd get mad.
188
00:16:02,341 --> 00:16:04,639
l won't get angry.
189
00:16:09,915 --> 00:16:13,646
My friends aren't in Greece,
they're in Spain.
190
00:16:13,686 --> 00:16:17,679
l caused this royal mess
to go to los.
191
00:16:17,723 --> 00:16:21,625
The island of love,
it's always been my dream!
192
00:16:21,661 --> 00:16:24,459
And there l will lose my virginity.
193
00:16:24,497 --> 00:16:26,465
lf not there, where?
194
00:16:26,499 --> 00:16:29,263
Who said you have to?
195
00:16:29,302 --> 00:16:32,100
lt's a big deal for me!
196
00:16:32,138 --> 00:16:36,040
Guys get turned off because
they can tell l'm still a virgin!
197
00:16:48,220 --> 00:16:51,451
Stop staring, go back to sleep!
198
00:16:51,490 --> 00:16:54,118
You sleep,
l have to learn!
199
00:17:27,093 --> 00:17:28,822
Now what?
200
00:17:28,861 --> 00:17:31,329
Do you hate me now
that l told you the truth?
201
00:17:34,767 --> 00:17:37,930
You grownups always want us
to lie behind your backs.
202
00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:41,269
You're like Mother,
203
00:17:41,307 --> 00:17:43,241
you can't handle the truth!
204
00:17:44,810 --> 00:17:49,611
l'm in charge of you now,
this is too big of a responsibility.
205
00:17:49,648 --> 00:17:52,276
l can handle the truth.
206
00:17:52,318 --> 00:17:56,220
lt's that you want to do it
with a complete stranger!
207
00:17:56,255 --> 00:17:59,053
Listen to me!
208
00:17:59,091 --> 00:18:02,822
lt will be horrible
and you'll remember it forever.
209
00:18:02,862 --> 00:18:07,265
No. l'm going to have
a triple orgasm.
210
00:18:09,902 --> 00:18:12,336
l read all about it.
211
00:18:12,371 --> 00:18:15,397
You have to be relaxed.
212
00:18:17,610 --> 00:18:20,738
You have to practice first.
213
00:18:20,780 --> 00:18:25,877
So when you fall in love
you don't give a bad impression!
214
00:18:25,918 --> 00:18:28,546
What kind of logic is that?
215
00:18:28,587 --> 00:18:30,817
That's my philosophy.
216
00:18:54,079 --> 00:18:57,276
How old were you
the first time you did it?
217
00:18:57,316 --> 00:19:00,376
You do it when you're ready.
218
00:19:00,419 --> 00:19:02,717
Okay, l was 19.
219
00:19:02,755 --> 00:19:05,656
Were you in love?
220
00:19:05,691 --> 00:19:08,353
Of course.
221
00:19:08,394 --> 00:19:10,988
How was it?
222
00:19:11,030 --> 00:19:15,490
- lt just was!
- See?
223
00:19:15,534 --> 00:19:18,526
You were in love and it sucked.
224
00:19:18,571 --> 00:19:22,803
- lt was my first time!
- You should have done it before.
225
00:19:22,842 --> 00:19:25,834
- Before what?
- Before the first time.
226
00:20:11,257 --> 00:20:13,384
Do you only do weird things?
227
00:20:13,425 --> 00:20:16,053
You eat dessert before your meal?
228
00:20:16,095 --> 00:20:18,723
Who decides what's normal?
229
00:20:18,764 --> 00:20:22,097
Weren't you on a diet?
230
00:20:22,134 --> 00:20:24,762
Chocolate makes you lose weight.
231
00:20:30,109 --> 00:20:32,600
l knew it!
232
00:20:32,645 --> 00:20:35,478
lt's exactly like Andrea's cake!
233
00:20:35,514 --> 00:20:37,573
Some secret!
They make it here.
234
00:20:37,616 --> 00:20:39,584
lt's really good, though.
235
00:20:39,618 --> 00:20:43,110
Not as good as his.
236
00:20:44,590 --> 00:20:46,421
What are you doing?
237
00:20:46,458 --> 00:20:50,588
My head has to be in the North
or l can't sleep.
238
00:20:50,629 --> 00:20:52,859
Get up,
l need to move the bed.
239
00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,814
- ls this your summer homework?
- Yes.
240
00:21:11,850 --> 00:21:14,751
What if he does tantric sex?
241
00:21:14,787 --> 00:21:17,688
l'll have to do it for 5 hours!
242
00:21:17,723 --> 00:21:19,691
You have a serious problem.
243
00:21:19,725 --> 00:21:22,660
l know, my hormones
are out of control.
244
00:21:22,695 --> 00:21:23,923
Let's go to the beach!
245
00:21:23,963 --> 00:21:26,295
No, the sun is too hot.
246
00:21:26,332 --> 00:21:28,197
Let's take a nap.
247
00:21:28,233 --> 00:21:30,758
l'm almost 15,
l'll sleep when l'm old.
248
00:22:11,043 --> 00:22:14,501
There's your last chance.
249
00:22:14,546 --> 00:22:17,242
- She must be 30!
- Exactly.
250
00:22:17,282 --> 00:22:20,149
Wouldn't you put out
at her age?
251
00:22:20,185 --> 00:22:22,312
lf l was a woman
l'd put out non-stop.
252
00:22:35,334 --> 00:22:37,962
ltalian?
253
00:22:38,003 --> 00:22:40,403
l'm Marco, this is Pippo.
254
00:22:40,439 --> 00:22:42,999
Stefania, nice to meet you.
This is my niece Meggy.
255
00:22:43,042 --> 00:22:47,001
Where is everyone on this island?
256
00:22:47,046 --> 00:22:49,879
- What are we?
- l mean everyone...
257
00:22:49,915 --> 00:22:52,349
They party at night and sleep all day.
258
00:22:52,384 --> 00:22:55,717
And you losers go to bed early.
259
00:22:55,754 --> 00:22:57,517
Don't you want a tan?
260
00:22:57,556 --> 00:23:01,458
The sun is bad for you
at this time of day.
261
00:23:01,493 --> 00:23:05,554
l get polymorphous light eruption.
262
00:23:12,604 --> 00:23:14,834
Are you going
to the Scorpion tonight?
263
00:23:14,873 --> 00:23:16,568
Yuck!
264
00:23:16,608 --> 00:23:18,974
Only toddlers go there!
265
00:23:21,447 --> 00:23:25,679
Since you insist on talking to us,
let's take a test.
266
00:23:26,685 --> 00:23:29,119
''What are you like in bed?''
267
00:23:29,154 --> 00:23:32,612
''A friend invites you to a partouze.''
268
00:23:32,658 --> 00:23:35,525
- What's that?
- An orgy.
269
00:23:37,296 --> 00:23:38,285
''What do you do?''
270
00:23:38,330 --> 00:23:40,594
A. You are shocked and decline.
271
00:23:40,632 --> 00:23:43,567
B. You go check it out.
272
00:23:43,602 --> 00:23:47,003
C. You plan the next one
at your house.
273
00:23:47,039 --> 00:23:51,271
A. l am shocked and decline.
274
00:23:51,310 --> 00:23:54,006
- Right?
- Well, it depends.
275
00:23:55,347 --> 00:23:58,145
C. The next one would be
at my house.
276
00:23:58,183 --> 00:24:01,812
- How would you know?
- That's why l choose C!
277
00:24:01,854 --> 00:24:04,288
- l choose C too. Pippo?
- C.
278
00:24:05,491 --> 00:24:08,824
We get five points.
Stefania... zero!
279
00:24:10,496 --> 00:24:13,829
''How do you feel about someone
watching you have sex?''
280
00:24:13,866 --> 00:24:15,731
''A. Major turn-on''.
l pick A.
281
00:24:15,768 --> 00:24:17,861
Read B and C!
282
00:24:17,903 --> 00:24:20,030
You just want the most points!
283
00:24:20,072 --> 00:24:22,700
Just chill!
284
00:24:22,741 --> 00:24:24,800
Enough talking, l want some action.
285
00:24:26,478 --> 00:24:28,776
Later l'll quiz you on oral sex.
286
00:24:28,814 --> 00:24:30,679
Where are you going?
287
00:24:30,716 --> 00:24:33,947
Are you sure you're related?
288
00:24:33,986 --> 00:24:35,954
Unfortunately.
289
00:24:35,988 --> 00:24:38,684
ls her best friend her mother?
290
00:24:38,724 --> 00:24:41,249
How do l know?
Why?
291
00:24:41,293 --> 00:24:43,727
Girls like that are teases.
292
00:24:43,762 --> 00:24:45,593
Mothers are an important factor.
293
00:24:45,631 --> 00:24:48,293
They don't put out to rebel,
they do it when they want to.
294
00:24:48,333 --> 00:24:51,530
Friendship has ruined it for us.
295
00:24:52,938 --> 00:24:56,499
- Mother is my best friend.
- All you do is fight!
296
00:24:56,542 --> 00:24:58,908
Because of the fight on the phone?
297
00:24:58,944 --> 00:25:02,141
No, l have to go ballistic on her.
298
00:25:02,181 --> 00:25:06,481
Otherwise she thinks
she isn't a good mother.
299
00:25:06,518 --> 00:25:10,614
- We talk about everything.
- You can talk to me too.
300
00:25:12,090 --> 00:25:15,582
l don't want to be a normal old aunt.
301
00:25:15,627 --> 00:25:19,290
l want to be your friend.
Do you?
302
00:25:19,331 --> 00:25:21,993
Menopause is lingering
and l'm still a virgin!
303
00:25:22,034 --> 00:25:23,058
What?
304
00:25:25,604 --> 00:25:27,936
Andrea, it's me.
305
00:25:27,973 --> 00:25:30,840
Was being free
a problem with us?
306
00:25:30,876 --> 00:25:33,037
l don't think it was.
307
00:25:33,078 --> 00:25:37,139
You went to Lucca in 1997
and l let you sleep there.
308
00:25:39,084 --> 00:25:40,574
And something else...
309
00:25:40,619 --> 00:25:44,680
if we had had children,
what would we have been like?
310
00:25:44,723 --> 00:25:47,283
Being parents is a pain!
311
00:25:49,194 --> 00:25:52,459
Anyway, this freedom thing
was a misconception.
312
00:25:52,497 --> 00:25:57,491
When you claimed l was holding back
your freedom, l was actually...
313
00:25:57,536 --> 00:26:01,165
Well it was for your own good!
314
00:26:05,444 --> 00:26:07,776
Call me if you get this message.
315
00:26:07,813 --> 00:26:10,782
l'm in los, Cyclades.
Greece!
316
00:26:10,816 --> 00:26:13,046
Some crazy teenager island!
317
00:26:13,085 --> 00:26:14,814
Write this number.
318
00:26:17,956 --> 00:26:21,483
Panorama Hotel.
You can call collect!
319
00:26:25,230 --> 00:26:29,064
Are you not answering because
you're screwing Silvia Magliocchetti?
320
00:26:29,101 --> 00:26:32,070
Or are you on vacation with her?
321
00:26:32,104 --> 00:26:34,766
ln either case, you and Silvia
can both fuck off!
322
00:26:34,806 --> 00:26:36,068
You idiot!
323
00:27:34,366 --> 00:27:37,164
l could have popped a blood vessel!
324
00:27:59,491 --> 00:28:01,391
You're coming with me.
325
00:28:01,426 --> 00:28:03,257
- Why?
- Who is this?
326
00:28:03,295 --> 00:28:05,525
- How would l know?
- And you're kissing him?
327
00:28:05,564 --> 00:28:07,998
How else can l get to know him?
328
00:28:08,033 --> 00:28:10,433
Will you get moving!
329
00:28:10,469 --> 00:28:13,768
lf l only have to make out, l'm set.
330
00:28:13,805 --> 00:28:18,174
When l was little l made up
new forms of kissing.
331
00:28:18,210 --> 00:28:22,306
The penguin, butterfly, chipmunk.
332
00:28:25,617 --> 00:28:28,142
l was Epicurean and didn't know it!
333
00:28:28,186 --> 00:28:30,677
We hadn't even studied philosophy yet.
334
00:28:32,958 --> 00:28:35,256
l wasn't even into that guy.
335
00:28:40,999 --> 00:28:43,365
Can l talk about Epicurus?
336
00:28:43,402 --> 00:28:46,769
Epicurus was all:
337
00:28:46,805 --> 00:28:51,174
''The liberation of your passions
is the path to happiness.
338
00:28:51,209 --> 00:28:53,473
Through philosophy...
339
00:28:53,512 --> 00:28:57,812
man frees himself
from all grievous sentiments.''
340
00:29:04,790 --> 00:29:08,191
- Have you guys seen Meggy?
- She went swimming.
341
00:29:08,226 --> 00:29:10,319
- By herself?
- Yeah. She'll be fine.
342
00:29:10,362 --> 00:29:12,523
Have a seat.
343
00:29:14,633 --> 00:29:16,624
- Want a beer?
- At breakfast?
344
00:29:16,668 --> 00:29:19,637
l'd probably puke.
345
00:29:24,643 --> 00:29:26,508
See what l mean?
346
00:29:28,647 --> 00:29:32,208
l can't stand seeing
everyone so relaxed!
347
00:29:32,250 --> 00:29:34,775
Have they done
their summer homework?
348
00:30:04,015 --> 00:30:06,415
Selfish.
349
00:30:57,335 --> 00:31:00,361
THERE'S NO SUCH THING
AS COINCIDENCE
350
00:31:19,324 --> 00:31:21,087
What's your name?
351
00:31:23,028 --> 00:31:24,689
Andrea.
352
00:31:24,729 --> 00:31:27,129
Huh?
Aeneas?
353
00:31:27,165 --> 00:31:29,963
Uh, yeah.
354
00:31:30,001 --> 00:31:32,526
Fab! l got an A on The Aeneid!
355
00:31:57,963 --> 00:32:00,158
My name's Meggy.
356
00:32:03,535 --> 00:32:06,299
- What are you doing?
- Drawing.
357
00:32:06,338 --> 00:32:10,365
Well, l'm learning how to draw.
358
00:32:12,377 --> 00:32:14,038
Are you here by yourself?
359
00:32:14,079 --> 00:32:16,741
Lucky you!
On the island of love...
360
00:32:16,781 --> 00:32:19,147
Are you with your parents?
361
00:32:21,019 --> 00:32:24,955
- l'm with...
- Your boyfriend?
362
00:32:26,358 --> 00:32:28,349
Yeah... l mean...
363
00:32:28,393 --> 00:32:30,418
No, he left.
364
00:32:30,462 --> 00:32:32,123
lt's not ''boyfriend''.
365
00:32:32,163 --> 00:32:34,495
lt's either ''remorse'' or ''regret''.
366
00:32:36,067 --> 00:32:38,058
Remorse, if you boinked.
367
00:32:38,103 --> 00:32:40,503
Regret, if you didn't.
368
00:32:40,538 --> 00:32:43,098
Which one is he?
369
00:32:43,141 --> 00:32:45,701
Remorse.
370
00:32:45,744 --> 00:32:48,907
l'm like way mature for my age.
371
00:32:52,651 --> 00:32:54,642
l'll be in the square tonight,
will you?
372
00:33:16,274 --> 00:33:17,969
Hey!
373
00:33:20,178 --> 00:33:22,169
This scale is broken, right?
374
00:33:29,888 --> 00:33:32,880
l found him!
The guy who's going to deflower me.
375
00:33:32,924 --> 00:33:36,416
He's gorgeous, funny
and a major sex monster.
376
00:33:36,461 --> 00:33:38,759
Like the gay guy in Savage Garden.
377
00:33:38,797 --> 00:33:40,788
His name's Aeneas!
Like in The Aeneid!
378
00:33:40,832 --> 00:33:42,891
Which one should l get?
379
00:33:42,934 --> 00:33:46,597
The colored ones are childish,
l don't trust ''Super-Thin''.
380
00:33:46,638 --> 00:33:48,538
''lncreased Duration''?
381
00:33:48,573 --> 00:33:50,632
He'll be self-conscious.
''Ribbed''?
382
00:33:50,675 --> 00:33:53,269
Not the first time!
383
00:33:53,311 --> 00:33:55,677
- Which one?
- Get them all.
384
00:33:55,714 --> 00:33:57,375
Oh my God, really?
385
00:34:03,021 --> 00:34:07,014
Not all questions
have specific answers.
386
00:34:07,058 --> 00:34:10,653
Ask a specific question
and you get a specific answer.
387
00:34:10,695 --> 00:34:14,392
What do l do
when my orgasm starts?
388
00:34:14,432 --> 00:34:16,559
Nothing!
389
00:34:16,601 --> 00:34:20,332
lf it happens,
thank God and enjoy it!
390
00:34:20,372 --> 00:34:22,272
Does this embarrass you?
391
00:34:22,307 --> 00:34:25,674
- You're avoiding the question!
- l am not!
392
00:34:25,710 --> 00:34:29,077
Does the word ''orgasm''
freak you out?
393
00:34:29,114 --> 00:34:32,140
lt's an actual scientific word!
394
00:34:32,183 --> 00:34:35,175
This is the island of love,
no one would freak over it.
395
00:34:35,220 --> 00:34:37,984
This club is called 69.
396
00:34:38,022 --> 00:34:41,082
And they have a drink called Orgasm.
397
00:34:41,126 --> 00:34:44,527
- Orgasm!
- l get the picture.
398
00:34:44,562 --> 00:34:47,622
- Relax.
- No one is even looking!
399
00:34:51,569 --> 00:34:55,061
lf a dude asks you out,
you can't say yes right away.
400
00:34:55,106 --> 00:34:57,939
You have to be all: ''l don't know...''
401
00:34:57,976 --> 00:35:00,536
Make him sweat.
402
00:35:01,679 --> 00:35:04,705
- Did you say no to Aeneas?
- He's different.
403
00:35:04,749 --> 00:35:07,411
He was too shy to ask me out.
404
00:35:07,452 --> 00:35:10,216
So l had to be all strategical.
405
00:35:10,255 --> 00:35:12,849
l was all:
''l'll be in the square tonight...''
406
00:35:12,891 --> 00:35:17,294
l set it up without him
feeling embarrassed.
407
00:35:17,328 --> 00:35:19,990
When are you meeting him?
408
00:35:20,031 --> 00:35:23,592
Don't people set exact times
and places anymore?
409
00:35:29,974 --> 00:35:31,202
Oh my God, l miss him already.
410
00:35:31,242 --> 00:35:35,076
- Doesn't he have to sweat?
- Like, right.
411
00:35:36,881 --> 00:35:39,076
You have to be way patient!
412
00:35:39,117 --> 00:35:42,518
Tell me about it.
413
00:36:13,985 --> 00:36:16,818
He's not coming.
lt's 4:15.
414
00:36:16,855 --> 00:36:19,221
- lt's late!
- lt's early!
415
00:36:19,257 --> 00:36:23,921
l'm tired.
Let's go to bed.
416
00:36:23,962 --> 00:36:25,429
Go ahead!
417
00:36:27,765 --> 00:36:29,824
l'm like a total loser!
418
00:36:29,868 --> 00:36:32,132
l'm only into one guy on this island.
419
00:36:32,170 --> 00:36:34,195
And he stood me up!
420
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,730
He could have told me!
421
00:36:36,774 --> 00:36:39,299
Men are never upfront with you.
422
00:36:39,344 --> 00:36:43,371
ln eight years Andrea couldn't say no.
423
00:36:43,414 --> 00:36:46,247
Always vague about everything.
424
00:36:46,284 --> 00:36:48,616
Let's change islands.
425
00:36:48,653 --> 00:36:51,417
They're either too young
or too shitty around here.
426
00:36:51,456 --> 00:36:57,122
You want me to pack my bags
because some jerk stood you up?
427
00:36:57,161 --> 00:36:59,925
- Yes.
- Right.
428
00:37:49,147 --> 00:37:51,308
What's up?
429
00:37:51,349 --> 00:37:53,317
Hey, Potato Head.
430
00:37:57,555 --> 00:38:00,183
Sorry l couldn't make it last night.
431
00:38:03,227 --> 00:38:05,957
- Where?
- Out to the square.
432
00:38:05,997 --> 00:38:09,899
- You said you'd come too.
- Ah, the square.
433
00:38:09,934 --> 00:38:12,334
l was busy.
434
00:38:20,345 --> 00:38:22,939
- Well, later.
- Later.
435
00:38:29,954 --> 00:38:31,615
Did you call me?
436
00:38:31,656 --> 00:38:33,146
No.
437
00:38:50,241 --> 00:38:52,072
- l got a present for you.
- For me?
438
00:38:54,979 --> 00:38:56,970
Meggy will never read it.
439
00:38:57,015 --> 00:38:59,176
lsn't it all descriptions?
440
00:38:59,217 --> 00:39:01,583
No, the title is sad.
441
00:39:01,619 --> 00:39:05,783
A best-seller title would be
''The Loves of Young Werther''.
442
00:39:05,823 --> 00:39:09,782
We always have to read books
about teen angst.
443
00:39:09,827 --> 00:39:12,125
- What's the deal?
- What do you think?
444
00:39:12,163 --> 00:39:14,097
l know, we're young...
445
00:39:14,132 --> 00:39:16,692
You know what it's going to say.
446
00:39:16,734 --> 00:39:22,263
''Young people think life is so bad,
enjoy it while you can!''
447
00:39:22,306 --> 00:39:24,968
ln one ear and out the other!
448
00:39:26,277 --> 00:39:28,575
Five more kilometers?
449
00:39:28,613 --> 00:39:32,743
There's no way, the sun's too hot.
450
00:39:32,784 --> 00:39:35,014
lt's Homer's tomb!
451
00:39:35,053 --> 00:39:37,647
Bart, Lisa and Marge
might be there!
452
00:39:37,689 --> 00:39:40,658
What are you talking about?
Don't you know ''Odyssey''?
453
00:39:40,692 --> 00:39:44,253
- Don't you know ''The Simpsons''?
- What about them?
454
00:39:47,665 --> 00:39:49,690
We'll see the tomb another time.
455
00:39:49,734 --> 00:39:53,261
lt's not a tomb, it's a cenotaph.
456
00:39:53,304 --> 00:39:55,898
All this way
and it's not even a tomb.
457
00:39:55,940 --> 00:39:58,238
Cenotaph, an empty tomb!
458
00:39:59,577 --> 00:40:01,636
Oh, it was a joke.
459
00:40:08,686 --> 00:40:12,019
Keep reading, geek.
Maybe you'll learn something!
460
00:40:12,056 --> 00:40:15,116
- Fuck you!
- You'd like that!
461
00:40:17,228 --> 00:40:19,822
Pippo makes me sick!
462
00:40:19,864 --> 00:40:21,923
Virgin is written all over his face.
463
00:40:21,966 --> 00:40:24,992
You look like you're going
to a porn star convention!
464
00:40:25,036 --> 00:40:27,266
l wish l was!
465
00:40:27,305 --> 00:40:29,739
Maybe Aeneas would be nicer to me.
466
00:40:31,008 --> 00:40:33,943
Wait! You're always running.
467
00:40:33,978 --> 00:40:36,845
Not existing just sucks!
468
00:40:36,881 --> 00:40:40,180
l don't exist for him.
l'm invisible!
469
00:40:42,286 --> 00:40:44,345
He called me ''Potato Head''!
470
00:40:44,388 --> 00:40:46,583
So?
471
00:40:46,624 --> 00:40:48,592
lt's a term of endearment.
472
00:40:48,626 --> 00:40:50,253
Know what he talked about?
473
00:40:50,294 --> 00:40:52,353
Cartoons!
474
00:40:52,396 --> 00:40:55,991
What will his next topic be?
Barbie?
475
00:40:56,033 --> 00:40:59,628
l gave up cartoons a whole year ago!
476
00:40:59,670 --> 00:41:03,572
What's wrong with cartoons?
477
00:41:03,608 --> 00:41:06,042
Guys grow up slower.
478
00:41:06,077 --> 00:41:08,443
l don't even know his cartoons!
479
00:41:08,479 --> 00:41:10,538
Who's the Hair Bear Bunch?
480
00:41:10,581 --> 00:41:15,075
The three bears on
an invisible motorcycle!
481
00:41:15,119 --> 00:41:17,451
lt was on when l was little.
482
00:41:17,488 --> 00:41:19,649
That was years ago!
483
00:41:19,690 --> 00:41:22,090
l used to watch it.
484
00:41:23,895 --> 00:41:26,022
How can this kid know about it?
485
00:41:28,065 --> 00:41:31,728
- How old is this Aeneas?
- Don't know and don't care.
486
00:41:31,769 --> 00:41:34,067
Well, l do!
487
00:41:35,273 --> 00:41:38,106
lt won't work if he's too old.
488
00:41:38,142 --> 00:41:42,238
Catherine Zeta-Jones is 30 years younger
than Michael Douglas.
489
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:45,340
The art world doesn't count.
490
00:41:45,383 --> 00:41:48,841
Aeneas is an artist.
He's a killer drawer!
491
00:41:48,886 --> 00:41:53,823
10 or 15 years difference means
he's experienced.
492
00:41:53,858 --> 00:41:57,191
15 years is too much!
493
00:41:57,228 --> 00:42:01,665
When you were coming out
of your mother's uterus,
494
00:42:01,699 --> 00:42:06,227
he was already trying
to get in someone else's!
495
00:42:06,270 --> 00:42:09,967
- Like l care.
- Well, the law does!
496
00:42:10,007 --> 00:42:12,737
Emotions obey no law!
497
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:19,914
- He's from a different generation.
- Like who cares?
498
00:42:19,951 --> 00:42:22,647
He had to get up to change
the TV station!
499
00:42:22,687 --> 00:42:27,181
- Why?
- There were no remote controls yet!
500
00:42:27,225 --> 00:42:28,954
Shut up!
501
00:43:05,730 --> 00:43:07,527
He's not here!
502
00:43:38,596 --> 00:43:41,292
Hear that?
He said you're beautiful.
503
00:43:46,537 --> 00:43:49,734
When he comes,
don't say you're my aunt.
504
00:43:52,944 --> 00:43:54,935
Say you're my cousin.
505
00:43:54,979 --> 00:43:58,506
No, say you're my friend.
506
00:44:01,686 --> 00:44:04,814
No, stand over there
and scope him out.
507
00:44:04,855 --> 00:44:07,949
Then tell me what you think later.
508
00:44:09,226 --> 00:44:10,693
Get moving.
509
00:44:24,041 --> 00:44:28,705
Andrea and l broke up
exactly ten days ago.
510
00:44:28,746 --> 00:44:31,340
As if anyone cared!
511
00:44:40,324 --> 00:44:41,348
Great!
512
00:44:41,392 --> 00:44:43,121
Sun rash.
513
00:44:46,030 --> 00:44:47,497
lt's your fault!
514
00:44:47,531 --> 00:44:51,399
l told you the sun is too hot
at this time of day.
515
00:44:51,435 --> 00:44:54,632
- You know what this means?
- You can't lay out anymore.
516
00:44:54,672 --> 00:44:57,800
You ruined my vacation!
517
00:45:22,933 --> 00:45:25,094
lt's Meggy!
518
00:45:26,670 --> 00:45:29,503
ls there a porn star convention
on the island?
519
00:45:29,540 --> 00:45:31,906
No, l'm going to Shooters.
520
00:45:31,942 --> 00:45:35,105
That's a club.
You go there at night.
521
00:45:35,146 --> 00:45:38,138
l am always ready ahead of time.
522
00:45:38,182 --> 00:45:40,742
Aren't you going?
523
00:45:40,785 --> 00:45:43,345
Maybe, l don't know.
524
00:45:47,291 --> 00:45:50,488
- Where are you going now?
- Swimming.
525
00:45:50,528 --> 00:45:54,760
- lf you wanna come...
- l'm not wearing my suit!
526
00:45:54,799 --> 00:45:57,700
Well, see you.
527
00:45:57,735 --> 00:46:00,397
When will l see you again?
528
00:46:02,540 --> 00:46:04,565
Maybe tonight at Shooters.
529
00:46:04,608 --> 00:46:07,202
Late, though.
530
00:46:07,244 --> 00:46:10,645
Or we'll run into each other,
it's a small island.
531
00:46:15,853 --> 00:46:17,616
Later, Potato Head.
532
00:46:45,082 --> 00:46:47,243
l have light eruption!
533
00:46:47,284 --> 00:46:51,084
Now l have to go out at night
and sleep during the day.
534
00:46:52,523 --> 00:46:55,720
- Wanna dance?
- l quit dancing.
535
00:46:55,759 --> 00:47:00,560
lt should be illegal at a certain age
and over a certain waist size!
536
00:47:00,598 --> 00:47:02,623
This music isn't really...
537
00:47:04,168 --> 00:47:07,001
- ls that ecstasy?
- Antihistamine.
538
00:47:09,306 --> 00:47:11,501
Are all guys like this?
539
00:47:11,542 --> 00:47:16,104
They're all: ''l'll be there'',
then they never show up?
540
00:47:16,147 --> 00:47:20,481
Guys will promise anything.
541
00:47:20,518 --> 00:47:24,215
They'll take you places,
take the trash out...
542
00:47:24,255 --> 00:47:28,988
Once they get what they want...
see ya!
543
00:47:29,026 --> 00:47:33,053
l'm a loser!
l didn't get to enjoy the first part.
544
00:47:39,937 --> 00:47:45,204
Are we sure this Aeneas really exists?
545
00:47:47,711 --> 00:47:50,305
Now l'll never see him!
546
00:47:50,347 --> 00:47:52,406
Let's find out...
547
00:47:52,449 --> 00:47:54,349
Aeneas?
548
00:47:54,385 --> 00:47:56,853
- Meggy's here!
- Clam up!
549
00:48:24,982 --> 00:48:26,950
Are you angry?
550
00:48:26,984 --> 00:48:29,578
l thought you were ''way mature''.
551
00:48:31,589 --> 00:48:33,989
You humiliated me in public!
552
00:48:34,024 --> 00:48:37,289
l was just trying to help.
553
00:48:37,328 --> 00:48:39,888
You're the one who needs help!
554
00:48:43,934 --> 00:48:48,030
Your problem is that
you do everything backwards.
555
00:48:48,072 --> 00:48:51,906
Dessert before salad.
Sex before love.
556
00:48:51,942 --> 00:48:55,878
You're my problem,
and you're clueless about yourself!
557
00:48:55,913 --> 00:49:00,077
- And how am l?
- You're anal!
558
00:49:00,117 --> 00:49:03,177
l can imagine you and Andrea boinking.
559
00:49:03,220 --> 00:49:07,281
''You're messing up my hair,
you're hurting my back!''
560
00:49:07,324 --> 00:49:09,588
''My chiropractor said
l can't do that position!''
561
00:49:09,627 --> 00:49:12,391
l bet you only do the missionary.
562
00:49:12,429 --> 00:49:15,956
- Admit it!
- Men like to feel dominant!
563
00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:18,867
Andrea dumped you
for that Magliocchetti chick,
564
00:49:18,902 --> 00:49:21,302
who boinks 100 times better
than you!
565
00:49:21,338 --> 00:49:25,832
l doubt he does
the same things with her.
566
00:49:25,876 --> 00:49:28,504
Like what?
567
00:49:28,545 --> 00:49:30,274
Foreplay?
568
00:49:30,314 --> 00:49:32,111
Did he discover
your erogenous zones?
569
00:49:32,149 --> 00:49:34,982
Your G-spot?
570
00:49:42,293 --> 00:49:45,057
lt was something only we did.
571
00:49:45,095 --> 00:49:47,325
Clean up your mess!
572
00:49:48,399 --> 00:49:51,835
- What was it?
- Not now. lt's late.
573
00:49:51,869 --> 00:49:55,066
You can sleep when you're old,
but l need sleep now.
574
00:49:55,105 --> 00:49:59,371
Duh, you need to sleep!
You're way mature for your age!
575
00:50:17,895 --> 00:50:19,829
Fuck off!
576
00:50:51,495 --> 00:50:52,621
Breakfast!
577
00:50:57,101 --> 00:51:00,537
Sorry about what l said last night.
578
00:51:00,571 --> 00:51:05,133
You're right.
l do everything backwards.
579
00:51:07,211 --> 00:51:09,509
But l still think you're anal.
580
00:51:13,250 --> 00:51:17,448
- Do you know what l do before sex?
- What?
581
00:51:17,488 --> 00:51:20,946
- l fold my clothes.
- Shut up!
582
00:51:24,828 --> 00:51:27,729
- God, you're a nutcase.
- l know.
583
00:51:27,765 --> 00:51:32,793
l try to lighten up but l just can't.
584
00:51:32,836 --> 00:51:34,827
Change.
585
00:51:34,872 --> 00:51:37,500
l don't know how.
586
00:51:38,809 --> 00:51:41,903
You totally lie to yourself.
587
00:51:41,945 --> 00:51:47,713
You pretend you're on this major diet,
but you eat whatever you want.
588
00:51:47,751 --> 00:51:52,279
You're all:
''Chocolate makes you lose weight''.
589
00:51:52,322 --> 00:51:55,155
Half a piece is way less fattening!
590
00:51:55,192 --> 00:51:57,683
You say you're a loser.
591
00:51:57,728 --> 00:51:59,821
This is the best time of your life!
592
00:51:59,863 --> 00:52:03,026
Being 15 sucks!
593
00:52:03,066 --> 00:52:05,432
Wait till you're 30!
594
00:52:07,371 --> 00:52:09,362
Peace?
595
00:52:09,406 --> 00:52:12,466
- l love you, Auntie.
- Me too.
596
00:52:14,411 --> 00:52:16,936
l thought about this creep you like.
597
00:52:16,980 --> 00:52:19,073
Give up.
598
00:52:19,116 --> 00:52:21,846
There are two kinds of women.
599
00:52:21,885 --> 00:52:26,652
Ones who get serious
with the wrong guy... like me.
600
00:52:26,690 --> 00:52:31,059
And those who never date because
they want unattainable guys, like you.
601
00:52:38,902 --> 00:52:40,802
Why is Aeneas unattainable?
602
00:52:40,838 --> 00:52:42,965
You have nothing to talk about.
603
00:52:43,006 --> 00:52:45,998
People should have things
in common.
604
00:52:46,043 --> 00:52:48,443
Like l care!
605
00:52:48,479 --> 00:52:50,538
l just like his body!
606
00:52:50,581 --> 00:52:53,141
Maybe he wants more.
607
00:52:53,183 --> 00:52:55,174
You can leave...
608
00:52:55,219 --> 00:52:59,315
You mean he's not attracted to me?
609
00:52:59,356 --> 00:53:03,087
Maybe he needs
a connection with you.
610
00:53:03,126 --> 00:53:06,061
A similar cultural background
is important.
611
00:53:06,096 --> 00:53:10,624
Andrea and l grew up in the 80's
so we liked the same things.
612
00:53:10,667 --> 00:53:14,467
He fell in love with me because
l cried watching ''Facts of Life''.
613
00:53:16,540 --> 00:53:19,134
We used to watch the same TV shows.
614
00:53:21,311 --> 00:53:23,836
''Little House on the Prairie''.
615
00:53:25,682 --> 00:53:28,742
''Three's Company'', ''Bewitched''.
616
00:53:28,785 --> 00:53:31,345
''Eight ls Enough''.
617
00:53:31,388 --> 00:53:33,788
''Fantasy lsland''!
618
00:53:36,426 --> 00:53:39,054
What do you say,
l could get my navel pierced!
619
00:53:41,999 --> 00:53:45,628
lt's hard to talk about the 80's.
620
00:53:45,669 --> 00:53:48,638
That was the best decade ever
and it's over.
621
00:53:48,672 --> 00:53:51,505
- Give me the cortisone.
- Do you itch?
622
00:53:51,542 --> 00:53:54,067
No, just to keep you company.
623
00:53:55,379 --> 00:53:56,812
You know what it reminds me of?
624
00:53:56,847 --> 00:53:59,213
ln school,
my friends and l
625
00:53:59,249 --> 00:54:02,343
would practice what to say
to guys.
626
00:54:02,386 --> 00:54:06,117
lf you like a guy,
you had to use his words.
627
00:54:06,156 --> 00:54:09,125
You had to say what
he wanted to hear.
628
00:54:10,093 --> 00:54:12,061
For example?
629
00:54:13,897 --> 00:54:15,762
Talking about old movies
was a winner.
630
00:54:15,799 --> 00:54:18,825
- SAY IT IN MY WORDS
- ...''Love Story'' was perfect.
631
00:54:21,138 --> 00:54:23,003
Then what?
632
00:54:23,040 --> 00:54:27,033
To talk about politics without being
political, you talked about punk music
633
00:54:27,077 --> 00:54:29,841
being a counter-reaction
to Thatcher.
634
00:54:29,880 --> 00:54:32,781
A real artist
has to have a nemesis.
635
00:54:32,816 --> 00:54:35,478
l don't understand,
but it sounds great.
636
00:54:35,519 --> 00:54:37,612
So l'm all:
637
00:54:37,654 --> 00:54:41,522
''What if all he cares about
is physical attraction''?
638
00:54:41,558 --> 00:54:43,685
Who?
639
00:54:43,727 --> 00:54:47,527
You!
You are not paying attention!
640
00:54:47,564 --> 00:54:50,431
You only use single syllable words!
641
00:54:50,467 --> 00:54:52,765
Because l'm drawing!
642
00:54:52,803 --> 00:54:55,135
Come over here and try.
643
00:54:57,307 --> 00:55:01,767
lt stimulates your artistic brain
and turns off your mouth.
644
00:55:01,812 --> 00:55:03,803
Come on, here's a piece of paper.
645
00:55:03,847 --> 00:55:04,871
Go ahead.
646
00:55:06,717 --> 00:55:09,083
My brain must be in stereo.
647
00:55:09,119 --> 00:55:13,453
l can draw and talk
at the same time!
648
00:55:15,058 --> 00:55:19,893
l think it's way important to have
similar cultural backgrounds.
649
00:55:19,930 --> 00:55:24,128
Let's talk about movies.
l think ''Love Story'' is great.
650
00:55:24,167 --> 00:55:26,635
The book was good too.
651
00:55:26,670 --> 00:55:28,865
Well, l saw the movie!
652
00:55:28,905 --> 00:55:31,601
Maybe they wrote a book afterwards.
653
00:55:31,642 --> 00:55:34,634
Comparing a book to a movie
654
00:55:34,678 --> 00:55:37,511
is like totally absurd!
655
00:55:37,547 --> 00:55:39,276
How about music?
656
00:55:39,316 --> 00:55:42,376
Thatcher was like royally strict.
657
00:55:42,419 --> 00:55:46,856
- She's not a school teacher.
- Okay, so l don't know who she is.
658
00:55:46,890 --> 00:55:48,687
But punk music was a counter-reaction.
659
00:55:48,725 --> 00:55:53,059
- A real artist has to...
- Have a nemesis.
660
00:55:53,096 --> 00:55:54,620
Everyone says that.
661
00:55:54,665 --> 00:55:56,064
What is this?
662
00:55:56,099 --> 00:55:58,294
You want right-winged extremism
so you can
663
00:55:58,335 --> 00:56:01,736
listen to revolutionary music
in your bedroom?
664
00:56:03,607 --> 00:56:05,507
Pick another topic.
665
00:56:05,542 --> 00:56:07,567
The 1980's!
666
00:56:07,611 --> 00:56:10,978
- The 80's were horrible!
- You don't like anything!
667
00:56:11,014 --> 00:56:13,175
What are we supposed to talk about?
668
00:56:14,184 --> 00:56:17,210
You get one more chance.
TV shows.
669
00:56:17,254 --> 00:56:19,950
The ''Love Boat'' rocked!
670
00:56:19,990 --> 00:56:24,552
- And ''Eight ls Enough''.
- Girlie shows.
671
00:56:24,594 --> 00:56:27,392
What about ''Facts of Life''?
672
00:56:27,431 --> 00:56:31,128
Could you get any more pathetic?
673
00:56:31,168 --> 00:56:35,002
The best minds of my generation
were brainwashed by ''Facts of Life''.
674
00:56:36,440 --> 00:56:39,068
- You feel all right?
- l'm fine.
675
00:56:48,018 --> 00:56:49,986
You're getting sunstroke.
676
00:57:08,205 --> 00:57:10,264
l can't go out like this.
677
00:57:10,307 --> 00:57:12,571
Do l look fat here?
678
00:57:12,609 --> 00:57:14,770
No, it makes you look younger!
679
00:57:16,413 --> 00:57:19,109
- So l look like my grandma?
- Let's play a game.
680
00:57:19,149 --> 00:57:23,813
l think of a question in my head
and find the answer in a book.
681
00:57:23,854 --> 00:57:26,288
- What kind of game is that?
- You'll see.
682
00:57:26,323 --> 00:57:28,655
First question.
683
00:57:31,595 --> 00:57:33,324
Answer.
684
00:57:35,532 --> 00:57:38,296
''A 20-minute orgasm''.
Here we are!
685
00:57:38,335 --> 00:57:41,862
- Massage and stimulation...
- Are you insinuating something?
686
00:57:43,440 --> 00:57:47,774
- Of course!
- ls that all you men think about?
687
00:57:47,811 --> 00:57:51,679
- This is the island of love!
- Sex is highly overrated!
688
00:57:51,715 --> 00:57:54,377
Because you've had it.
689
00:57:54,417 --> 00:57:56,180
For me it's just highly rated!
690
00:57:56,219 --> 00:57:59,154
l just got out of a long relationship.
691
00:57:59,189 --> 00:58:01,180
Let's...
692
00:58:01,224 --> 00:58:02,885
Let's just be friends, okay?
693
00:58:04,327 --> 00:58:07,728
Know who l am?
Every woman's best friend!
694
00:58:07,764 --> 00:58:12,292
Does a guy become an enemy
after he has sex?
695
00:58:12,335 --> 00:58:14,166
Where's the logic?
696
00:58:14,204 --> 00:58:16,263
We can do it and still be friends.
697
00:58:16,306 --> 00:58:18,672
Listen.
698
00:58:18,708 --> 00:58:20,767
You'll make up for it at 50.
699
00:58:20,811 --> 00:58:23,837
When you're friends are
old and gray!
700
00:58:23,880 --> 00:58:25,848
You will still be handsome.
701
00:58:25,882 --> 00:58:29,181
God, were you about to boink?
702
00:58:29,219 --> 00:58:32,518
Yeah, maybe in 34 years!
703
00:58:32,556 --> 00:58:37,016
Then you can wait,
this is way more important.
704
00:58:37,060 --> 00:58:40,587
Okay, we're like a couple now.
705
00:58:40,630 --> 00:58:42,791
We argued for an hour.
706
00:58:42,833 --> 00:58:47,702
He hates ''The Young Werther'',
the book you both love!
707
00:58:47,737 --> 00:58:50,297
Sorry for the interruption.
708
00:58:50,340 --> 00:58:54,003
The storm has passed,
let love come shining through!
709
00:58:57,214 --> 00:59:01,082
This kid hates ''Werther''
but at least he read it!
710
00:59:01,117 --> 00:59:06,749
l would tell Andrea the plot
then he'd act like he read it.
711
00:59:08,091 --> 00:59:12,357
You may be from the 80's
but you don't understand shit!
712
00:59:15,765 --> 00:59:18,928
You men always bail out of promises.
713
00:59:18,969 --> 00:59:20,732
Like what?
714
00:59:20,770 --> 00:59:24,171
You say you'll take the trash out
or whatever, then...
715
00:59:24,207 --> 00:59:27,142
Are you all carbon copies?
716
00:59:27,177 --> 00:59:29,077
You all say the same things!
717
00:59:31,548 --> 00:59:34,517
Women are the ones
who don't keep promises.
718
00:59:36,853 --> 00:59:38,821
You never diet the first two months.
719
00:59:38,855 --> 00:59:44,122
Then you're allergic to this,
that's too fattening...
720
00:59:44,160 --> 00:59:45,889
l'm not like that.
721
00:59:45,929 --> 00:59:48,454
l'm totally straight-up!
722
00:59:48,498 --> 00:59:51,490
Not you, women in general.
723
00:59:51,534 --> 00:59:54,560
My teacher was like that
724
00:59:54,604 --> 00:59:57,732
when l was still in school.
725
00:59:57,774 --> 01:00:00,971
She'd be all: ''Someone is talking''.
726
01:00:01,011 --> 01:00:04,412
Then she'd be all:
''lt's Vittorio Passarelli''!
727
01:00:07,017 --> 01:00:08,917
Who are you thinking about?
728
01:00:12,022 --> 01:00:13,990
Come on, tell me!
729
01:00:19,229 --> 01:00:22,756
There must be 800 calories in this.
730
01:00:22,799 --> 01:00:24,858
l have a royal problem.
731
01:00:24,901 --> 01:00:26,766
Guess who l remind him of?
732
01:00:26,803 --> 01:00:29,533
- Who?
- His ex!
733
01:00:29,572 --> 01:00:32,803
- His ex?
- Yes, he's still into her.
734
01:00:32,842 --> 01:00:35,333
He got all sad as soon as
he mentioned her.
735
01:00:35,378 --> 01:00:39,974
Then you have to find a way
to destroy her!
736
01:00:40,016 --> 01:00:43,349
- Groovy, you're on my side!
- lt's a matter of principle.
737
01:00:43,386 --> 01:00:47,482
You have to ruin the image
of ex-girlfriends early on.
738
01:00:47,524 --> 01:00:50,391
They forget about their faults
in time
739
01:00:50,427 --> 01:00:53,453
and no other woman
can ever live up to them!
740
01:00:53,496 --> 01:00:56,761
How can l ruin someone
l don't even know?
741
01:00:56,800 --> 01:00:59,667
Did he say anything about her?
742
01:00:59,703 --> 01:01:02,001
What was she like?
743
01:01:06,576 --> 01:01:09,477
She was thin
but thought she was fat!
744
01:01:09,512 --> 01:01:14,677
Those girls who try clothes on and say:
''l look fat''
745
01:01:14,718 --> 01:01:17,050
just so someone says
they're not.
746
01:01:17,087 --> 01:01:20,454
l detest them!
747
01:01:20,490 --> 01:01:24,824
There's only one way
to define girls like that, a bitch!
748
01:01:24,861 --> 01:01:27,421
Just like all ex's!
749
01:01:27,464 --> 01:01:30,865
We'll totally destroy her.
l've already figured her out.
750
01:01:30,900 --> 01:01:33,733
Find out what you can.
751
01:01:33,770 --> 01:01:36,261
l'll handle it, l'll take care of her.
752
01:01:39,709 --> 01:01:41,074
Where are you going?
753
01:01:41,111 --> 01:01:44,945
- To sleep.
- lt's 9:30, it's early!
754
01:01:44,981 --> 01:01:47,848
Aeneas gets up at 7.
755
01:01:47,884 --> 01:01:49,818
We like enjoying the day together.
756
01:01:50,820 --> 01:01:52,447
Didn't you notice?
757
01:01:52,489 --> 01:01:56,789
- Awesome! New clothes!
- No, they're yours!
758
01:01:56,826 --> 01:02:00,626
lt makes you look younger!
759
01:02:07,737 --> 01:02:10,763
l wanna know everything
about your past and your ex.
760
01:02:10,807 --> 01:02:13,105
lt will help me know you better.
761
01:02:13,143 --> 01:02:16,840
- What?
- lt will help me know you better.
762
01:02:18,848 --> 01:02:20,475
Differences.
763
01:02:20,517 --> 01:02:24,044
l'd lose things
and she'd always find them.
764
01:02:24,087 --> 01:02:27,250
l'd run out of money
and she has a hidden stash.
765
01:02:27,290 --> 01:02:30,657
l sleep at night
and she stays awake.
766
01:02:30,693 --> 01:02:34,561
l have a headache
and she shows up with aspirin.
767
01:02:36,699 --> 01:02:39,395
She likes mountains,
l like the sea.
768
01:02:39,436 --> 01:02:41,836
She's...
and l'm...
769
01:02:41,871 --> 01:02:45,170
She goes...
and l go...
770
01:02:45,208 --> 01:02:47,608
You couldn't really agree
on anything!
771
01:02:47,644 --> 01:02:49,669
Not really.
772
01:02:49,712 --> 01:02:53,944
At first we cherished our differences.
773
01:02:53,983 --> 01:02:56,577
We thought they would enrich us.
774
01:02:56,619 --> 01:03:01,386
Then she suddenly decided
we had to be the same.
775
01:03:01,424 --> 01:03:03,722
l had to be just like her.
776
01:03:03,760 --> 01:03:06,820
You don't know her,
being like her is...
777
01:03:08,898 --> 01:03:11,594
l would never dream
of changing you!
778
01:03:15,038 --> 01:03:18,906
l've got a lot of ideas and plans.
779
01:03:18,942 --> 01:03:21,638
She'd cut them all down.
780
01:03:21,678 --> 01:03:24,238
l'd tell her about an idea
and she'd say: ''No''.
781
01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:26,874
No to everything!
782
01:03:26,916 --> 01:03:29,817
l am the queen
of recognizing hip ideas!
783
01:03:29,853 --> 01:03:32,651
All of my CD's are
at the top of the charts.
784
01:03:35,325 --> 01:03:37,384
- Hit me.
- What?
785
01:03:37,427 --> 01:03:40,624
- Tell me an idea!
- Just like that?
786
01:03:40,663 --> 01:03:45,862
- Come on, man!
- l don't know, nothing comes to me.
787
01:03:45,902 --> 01:03:47,927
- Come on!
- All right.
788
01:03:50,573 --> 01:03:52,734
l write them in here.
789
01:03:52,775 --> 01:03:54,572
You never know.
790
01:03:54,611 --> 01:03:58,012
l might need them someday.
791
01:03:58,047 --> 01:03:59,742
How about this one...
792
01:04:01,951 --> 01:04:04,715
l could open a store...
793
01:04:04,754 --> 01:04:07,222
No, not this one.
794
01:04:09,025 --> 01:04:11,516
This one has already been done.
795
01:04:11,561 --> 01:04:14,029
Really?
No way!
796
01:04:14,297 --> 01:04:16,458
Listen to this one.
797
01:04:16,499 --> 01:04:20,026
This sounds stupid.
798
01:04:20,069 --> 01:04:23,402
l'm a guy who...
799
01:04:23,439 --> 01:04:26,033
l think you're a total genius.
800
01:04:39,756 --> 01:04:43,089
Oh my God, he sells ideas!
801
01:04:43,126 --> 01:04:45,492
Who doesn't?
802
01:04:45,528 --> 01:04:47,655
Andrea tried to, too.
803
01:04:47,697 --> 01:04:50,598
He wasn't good at it because
he wasn't self-confident.
804
01:04:50,633 --> 01:04:51,861
l kept telling him.
805
01:04:56,372 --> 01:04:58,670
How cute, they're making love!
806
01:04:58,708 --> 01:05:02,007
l think l like this Aeneas!
807
01:05:02,045 --> 01:05:03,774
He sounds perfect for me.
808
01:05:03,813 --> 01:05:07,874
- Friends don't steal boyfriends!
- l know!
809
01:05:07,917 --> 01:05:09,908
But he sounds really cool.
810
01:05:09,953 --> 01:05:12,217
And he went out with a bitch.
811
01:05:12,255 --> 01:05:14,223
lt figures!
812
01:05:14,257 --> 01:05:17,249
Two nice people never go out.
813
01:05:17,293 --> 01:05:20,456
lt's always one good
and one bad person.
814
01:05:20,496 --> 01:05:23,431
That's why l went out with Andrea.
815
01:05:23,466 --> 01:05:25,900
What else did he say?
816
01:05:25,935 --> 01:05:29,302
She wanted to change him into her.
817
01:05:29,339 --> 01:05:33,105
No, the classic mistake!
818
01:05:33,142 --> 01:05:35,440
You can't change people.
819
01:05:35,478 --> 01:05:36,672
But he stayed himself.
820
01:05:36,713 --> 01:05:40,171
- And the bitch dumped him.
- Good for him.
821
01:05:40,216 --> 01:05:44,243
- There's a real man.
- No, l doubt he beats women.
822
01:05:44,287 --> 01:05:45,948
He's just the cheating type.
823
01:05:45,989 --> 01:05:49,618
How awful!
He cheated on her!
824
01:05:53,630 --> 01:05:55,393
They've been at it for 20 minutes!
825
01:05:55,431 --> 01:05:57,763
- Did he cheat on her?
- They can, why can't l?
826
01:05:57,800 --> 01:05:59,927
Did he cheat on her or not?
827
01:05:59,969 --> 01:06:02,130
l don't know, l didn't ask.
828
01:06:02,171 --> 01:06:05,572
You're still here?
Go find out!
829
01:06:07,377 --> 01:06:09,311
Knock it off!
830
01:06:14,284 --> 01:06:18,414
l can't believe you sleep all day
and l sleep at night.
831
01:06:18,454 --> 01:06:20,718
You should have come
with someone your own age!
832
01:06:21,824 --> 01:06:23,451
Get moving!
833
01:07:04,767 --> 01:07:07,292
- l found out.
- He cheated?
834
01:07:07,337 --> 01:07:09,100
Affirmative.
835
01:07:13,242 --> 01:07:16,575
l think cheating is morally wrong.
People shouldn't cheat...
836
01:07:16,612 --> 01:07:20,946
but now that we've analyzed
the entire situation,
837
01:07:20,983 --> 01:07:24,714
l'd say the bitch deserved it.
838
01:07:26,389 --> 01:07:28,220
Poor girl!
839
01:07:31,494 --> 01:07:33,655
- You wanna hear?
- Yes!
840
01:07:33,696 --> 01:07:36,563
He did it with an ex-ex.
841
01:07:36,599 --> 01:07:41,059
- Two girlfriends ago.
- Then she's a double bitch!
842
01:07:41,104 --> 01:07:45,632
They couldn't see each other because
bitch number 1 wouldn't let them.
843
01:07:45,675 --> 01:07:47,540
Of course!
844
01:07:47,577 --> 01:07:51,343
lt's easy to screw an ex because
you've already done it!
845
01:07:51,381 --> 01:07:53,611
Can l continue?
846
01:07:53,649 --> 01:07:56,812
He sees this ex-ex again
847
01:07:56,853 --> 01:07:59,845
and old memories
resurface in him.
848
01:07:59,889 --> 01:08:03,052
- And they had sex.
- No! Way worse!
849
01:08:03,092 --> 01:08:04,855
What could be worse?
850
01:08:04,894 --> 01:08:08,591
They spent the whole night
wrapped in each other's arms
851
01:08:08,631 --> 01:08:11,759
crying and solving unresolved things.
852
01:08:11,801 --> 01:08:15,134
The next morning they were healed.
853
01:08:15,171 --> 01:08:17,662
Healed by love!
854
01:08:22,979 --> 01:08:24,776
lT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME
855
01:08:24,814 --> 01:08:27,476
Disgusting!
856
01:08:27,517 --> 01:08:29,508
IF WE GOT BACK TOGETHER,
I WOULD:
857
01:08:33,389 --> 01:08:37,416
That's it! l'm getting rid of this.
858
01:08:37,460 --> 01:08:40,020
Voice mail is the most useless thing
in the world!
859
01:08:40,062 --> 01:08:44,089
Andrea is with that sex bomb
and hasn't left any messages!
860
01:08:44,133 --> 01:08:46,863
No more wrinkle-free cream or medicines!
861
01:08:46,903 --> 01:08:50,304
You can have all my hidden chocolate!
862
01:08:50,339 --> 01:08:51,567
Here.
863
01:08:51,607 --> 01:08:55,236
Diets are against nature.
864
01:08:55,278 --> 01:08:57,405
From now on l'm eating and drinking!
865
01:08:57,447 --> 01:09:02,282
lt isn't food that makes you fat,
it's guilt!
866
01:09:02,318 --> 01:09:06,220
l'm tired of hearing
''it makes you look younger''!
867
01:09:06,255 --> 01:09:09,952
- You're going nuts.
- No, l'm normal now.
868
01:09:09,992 --> 01:09:12,620
This cake made me realize it.
869
01:09:12,662 --> 01:09:15,324
l like it better than Andrea's!
870
01:09:15,364 --> 01:09:20,802
Now go tell Aeneas he wasted years
on the wrong person.
871
01:09:20,837 --> 01:09:22,998
lt's time to start over and live!
872
01:09:23,039 --> 01:09:26,031
- l'm gonna do it.
- Go.
873
01:09:26,075 --> 01:09:28,635
- l'm taking your chocolate.
- Okay.
874
01:09:30,112 --> 01:09:32,808
- l'm going to eat it.
- Sure.
875
01:09:32,849 --> 01:09:34,476
lt makes you lose weight.
876
01:09:34,517 --> 01:09:37,452
But half a piece
is even less fattening.
877
01:09:47,196 --> 01:09:50,495
Your relationship totally sucked.
878
01:09:50,533 --> 01:09:53,696
She was all anal
and tried to change you.
879
01:09:53,736 --> 01:09:57,672
She was clueless about your creativity
and hated your friends.
880
01:09:57,707 --> 01:10:00,608
She was jealous about your ex's.
881
01:10:00,643 --> 01:10:02,907
l hope l'm not going overboard,
882
01:10:02,945 --> 01:10:08,178
but you wasted years on someone
who wasn't all that.
883
01:10:10,853 --> 01:10:13,515
You are such a honey!
884
01:10:18,694 --> 01:10:20,924
lsn't all that chocolate...
885
01:10:20,963 --> 01:10:22,863
Fattening?
886
01:10:22,899 --> 01:10:25,026
No. Because l don't feel guilty.
887
01:10:28,037 --> 01:10:30,528
Aeneas was all:
''What are we doing tonight?''
888
01:10:30,573 --> 01:10:35,101
l'm no longer a potato head,
l'm a human girl!
889
01:10:35,144 --> 01:10:38,739
- So?
- What's going to happen?
890
01:10:38,781 --> 01:10:42,239
Whatever happens, happens.
891
01:10:42,285 --> 01:10:44,845
Don't you get it, it's a royal mess!
892
01:10:44,887 --> 01:10:48,186
l'll look like a total loser
with the guy l'm in love with!
893
01:10:48,224 --> 01:10:50,692
Oh my God, l'm in love!
894
01:10:50,726 --> 01:10:53,524
We should have done it before.
895
01:10:53,563 --> 01:10:55,588
You're coming too!
896
01:10:55,631 --> 01:10:57,929
Are you crazy?
897
01:10:57,967 --> 01:11:01,994
lt's your responsibility,
l'm a minor!
898
01:11:02,038 --> 01:11:05,838
You want to rebel and expect me
to give you permission?
899
01:11:05,875 --> 01:11:07,900
l've quit mothering people.
900
01:11:07,944 --> 01:11:10,504
Look what happened with Andrea!
901
01:11:10,546 --> 01:11:13,379
Now he's screwing the sex bomb!
902
01:11:13,416 --> 01:11:16,510
lf you're ready, do it.
903
01:11:16,552 --> 01:11:18,349
This is your problem.
904
01:11:18,387 --> 01:11:20,651
So like, my heart will guide me?
905
01:11:20,690 --> 01:11:25,059
Something will guide you
but it won't be your heart.
906
01:11:25,094 --> 01:11:28,393
- A different organ?
- Yes.
907
01:11:28,431 --> 01:11:31,298
- A sex organ?
- Guess so.
908
01:11:36,038 --> 01:11:38,370
What's our song?
909
01:13:09,331 --> 01:13:10,696
You wanna come up?
910
01:13:15,538 --> 01:13:17,472
You didn't bring anything to drink!
911
01:13:40,596 --> 01:13:46,262
- What do you want?
- An orgasm. lf they have it.
912
01:13:56,679 --> 01:13:59,477
- What do you wanna do?
- Let's mosh.
913
01:14:31,480 --> 01:14:35,507
l'm not uncomfortable
talking about sex with you.
914
01:14:35,551 --> 01:14:38,281
What do you want to talk about?
915
01:14:38,320 --> 01:14:41,721
- Duration.
- All right, duration.
916
01:14:41,757 --> 01:14:44,988
l bet the guys you've had
all had that problem.
917
01:14:45,027 --> 01:14:47,757
- Yes.
- See?
918
01:14:47,797 --> 01:14:49,264
lt's not their fault.
919
01:14:49,298 --> 01:14:51,459
lt was because
they were inexperienced.
920
01:14:51,500 --> 01:14:56,528
Sex is being aware,
experimenting and exploring.
921
01:14:56,572 --> 01:15:00,338
l finally found my own method.
922
01:15:00,376 --> 01:15:02,435
What?
923
01:15:02,478 --> 01:15:04,446
Breathe in your chakra?
924
01:15:04,480 --> 01:15:07,449
- What?
- lt's tantric sex.
925
01:15:07,483 --> 01:15:10,043
- You like tantric sex?
- Of course!
926
01:15:10,085 --> 01:15:11,518
l don't.
927
01:15:11,554 --> 01:15:14,955
lt's like studying extinct languages,
Latin or Greek.
928
01:15:14,990 --> 01:15:18,289
l worked out my own method.
929
01:15:18,327 --> 01:15:20,761
When the situation...
930
01:15:20,796 --> 01:15:24,357
gets critical,
931
01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:27,028
l focus on Richie Cunningham's mom.
932
01:15:27,069 --> 01:15:28,764
Then the system shuts down.
933
01:15:28,804 --> 01:15:33,036
When the situation
in my other half cools down,
934
01:15:33,075 --> 01:15:35,475
l change channels in my head again.
935
01:15:35,511 --> 01:15:37,672
To see what's there.
There's always a game show.
936
01:15:37,713 --> 01:15:39,510
And then ready, set, go!
937
01:15:39,548 --> 01:15:41,573
l don't feel well.
938
01:15:42,852 --> 01:15:44,717
l'm going back to my tent.
939
01:15:47,089 --> 01:15:48,283
Goodnight.
940
01:15:50,726 --> 01:15:52,125
Goodnight?
941
01:15:52,161 --> 01:15:54,925
What's this?
942
01:15:57,733 --> 01:16:00,065
So Werther...
943
01:16:00,102 --> 01:16:03,594
doesn't kill himself
because of love,
944
01:16:03,639 --> 01:16:05,607
but because of lack of love.
945
01:16:05,641 --> 01:16:09,168
lt even says it in the preface!
946
01:16:09,211 --> 01:16:12,647
Anyway, it has a bad ending!
947
01:16:12,681 --> 01:16:15,912
At least he found love.
948
01:16:15,951 --> 01:16:20,081
There are more important things
than books.
949
01:16:23,225 --> 01:16:26,251
Help, l can't hold back!
950
01:16:26,295 --> 01:16:28,729
Something is taking control of me!
951
01:16:28,764 --> 01:16:30,789
l have to dance!
952
01:17:02,264 --> 01:17:06,530
- All the photocopies...
- What photocopies?
953
01:17:51,113 --> 01:17:54,241
Oh my God,
what's happening to me?
954
01:17:54,283 --> 01:17:59,050
lf l can kiss you,
then l'm capable of anything!
955
01:17:59,088 --> 01:18:00,578
Thanks a lot!
956
01:18:13,802 --> 01:18:15,702
Here.
957
01:18:23,479 --> 01:18:25,845
Goodnight.
958
01:19:13,862 --> 01:19:15,454
l'm in love with you.
959
01:19:39,288 --> 01:19:41,950
Are we going to have sex now?
960
01:20:28,670 --> 01:20:32,003
Oh my God, Aeneas is dead!
961
01:20:34,943 --> 01:20:37,104
Slow down, you're hurting me!
962
01:20:37,146 --> 01:20:38,443
Stop it!
963
01:20:41,850 --> 01:20:43,613
He's in there.
964
01:20:43,652 --> 01:20:46,212
You look, l'll freak out.
965
01:20:54,796 --> 01:20:56,423
What is it?
966
01:20:56,465 --> 01:21:00,060
- Tell me you didn't do it!
- You said you wouldn't care.
967
01:21:00,102 --> 01:21:03,833
- Tell me you didn't do it!
- No, we just kissed!
968
01:21:03,872 --> 01:21:07,672
- Get her out of here.
- No, let go of me!
969
01:21:07,709 --> 01:21:10,439
Will you chill?
970
01:21:41,677 --> 01:21:43,406
Oh, fuck off!
971
01:21:43,445 --> 01:21:45,606
l get the point!
972
01:22:12,708 --> 01:22:14,767
ls he okay, is he dead?
973
01:22:14,810 --> 01:22:18,405
No, he's better off than both of us.
974
01:22:18,447 --> 01:22:23,908
- He's cute, isn't he?
- He's all right.
975
01:22:25,687 --> 01:22:29,623
Sometimes people aren't
what they seem.
976
01:22:29,658 --> 01:22:31,888
Not today!
977
01:22:41,770 --> 01:22:47,174
ls it possible that all your life
you think you're a certain way,
978
01:22:47,209 --> 01:22:51,771
then suddenly you find out
people think you're something else?
979
01:22:53,181 --> 01:22:55,081
What are you really like?
980
01:22:55,117 --> 01:23:00,111
What you feel inside
or how other people see you?
981
01:23:00,155 --> 01:23:03,386
How other people see you.
982
01:23:03,425 --> 01:23:05,893
The majority always rules.
983
01:23:14,336 --> 01:23:16,099
Wish me happy birthday.
984
01:23:18,140 --> 01:23:19,903
l'm 15 today!
985
01:23:20,942 --> 01:23:23,137
Do you want a cake?
986
01:23:23,178 --> 01:23:26,045
Chocolate,
ginger and cinnamon okay?
987
01:23:29,718 --> 01:23:31,879
What's wrong?
988
01:23:31,920 --> 01:23:35,549
Being 15 trips me out.
989
01:23:36,858 --> 01:23:41,090
l'm like halfway to being you!
990
01:23:50,539 --> 01:23:52,700
Why aren't you talking?
991
01:23:52,741 --> 01:23:56,074
Are you embarrassed
about passing out?
992
01:23:56,111 --> 01:23:57,601
Yeah, right.
993
01:23:57,646 --> 01:24:01,548
- Nothing would have happened.
- We kissed.
994
01:24:01,583 --> 01:24:03,574
- We did?
- Yes.
995
01:24:03,618 --> 01:24:07,213
- lt doesn't mean anything.
- lt does so!
996
01:24:07,255 --> 01:24:09,052
Make a decision.
997
01:24:09,091 --> 01:24:11,025
Yes or no!
998
01:24:13,428 --> 01:24:15,794
You won't decide
or you decided no?
999
01:24:15,831 --> 01:24:17,594
l decided no.
1000
01:24:17,632 --> 01:24:21,068
- Why not?
- Because l said so.
1001
01:24:21,103 --> 01:24:24,038
You're still thinking about your ex!
1002
01:24:27,175 --> 01:24:29,143
But we totally ruined her!
1003
01:24:30,812 --> 01:24:32,939
l'm totally wasting time with you.
1004
01:24:32,981 --> 01:24:34,744
You're probably anal too!
1005
01:24:34,783 --> 01:24:37,946
l bet you fold your clothes
before you have sex!
1006
01:24:38,987 --> 01:24:41,046
This was a present for you!
1007
01:25:27,669 --> 01:25:30,103
Ginger and cinnamon.
1008
01:25:33,909 --> 01:25:36,844
This freedom thing
was a misconception.
1009
01:25:36,878 --> 01:25:41,281
When you claimed l was holding back
your freedom l was actually...
1010
01:25:42,918 --> 01:25:45,216
l was doing it for your own good!
1011
01:25:45,253 --> 01:25:47,778
lf you get this message, call me.
1012
01:25:47,823 --> 01:25:50,383
l'm in los, Cyclades.
Greece.
1013
01:25:50,425 --> 01:25:53,019
This crazy teenager island.
1014
01:25:53,061 --> 01:25:54,551
Write this number.
1015
01:25:58,467 --> 01:26:01,834
Hotel Panorama.
You can call collect.
1016
01:26:03,071 --> 01:26:07,132
Are you not answering
because you're screwing Silvia?
1017
01:26:11,646 --> 01:26:14,979
He changed his mind
from one day to the next!
1018
01:26:15,016 --> 01:26:17,576
l'm sure he has his reasons.
1019
01:26:17,619 --> 01:26:20,053
Hopefully you'll never find out why.
1020
01:26:20,088 --> 01:26:22,386
He's probably already left the island.
1021
01:26:22,424 --> 01:26:24,392
l won't ever know why,
he's a coward.
1022
01:26:24,426 --> 01:26:27,122
The bitch doesn't know he cheated.
1023
01:26:27,162 --> 01:26:30,256
- Stop calling her a bitch.
- Why?
1024
01:26:30,298 --> 01:26:33,233
Because l said so.
1025
01:26:33,268 --> 01:26:36,135
Oh my God, it's him!
1026
01:26:36,171 --> 01:26:39,538
- He's gonna see how old l am!
- Just eat your candles!
1027
01:26:42,010 --> 01:26:44,240
Happy Birthday!
1028
01:26:44,279 --> 01:26:46,611
Well?
1029
01:26:48,783 --> 01:26:52,116
You look cool in the shirt l got you!
1030
01:26:55,690 --> 01:26:57,715
l'm Pippo.
1031
01:27:00,629 --> 01:27:03,120
Stefania, this is Aeneas.
1032
01:27:03,164 --> 01:27:05,257
Nice fucking name you picked out!
1033
01:27:16,611 --> 01:27:19,375
So, how did you know
about my birthday party?
1034
01:27:19,414 --> 01:27:21,075
The cake.
1035
01:27:21,116 --> 01:27:23,880
- Do you want a piece?
- No.
1036
01:27:23,919 --> 01:27:26,479
lt's good,
there's a secret ingredient.
1037
01:27:26,521 --> 01:27:28,352
There are two.
Ginger and cinnamon.
1038
01:27:30,725 --> 01:27:34,456
- Have you already tried it?
- l made it.
1039
01:27:37,432 --> 01:27:39,161
He made it.
1040
01:27:42,704 --> 01:27:45,537
- THE ISLAND OF HYSTERICAL FEMALES
- l'm gonna kill you!
1041
01:28:30,518 --> 01:28:34,045
l'm such a loser!
Couldn't you be someone else's ex?
1042
01:28:35,190 --> 01:28:38,682
Get over it!
We'll find someone else.
1043
01:28:39,361 --> 01:28:42,888
You're clueless!
I care who it is!
1044
01:28:45,467 --> 01:28:47,731
And you gave me too much freedom.
1045
01:28:47,769 --> 01:28:50,533
lf you wanna be my aunt, act like it!
1046
01:28:56,845 --> 01:29:00,906
You know that nothing happened
between Meggy and me.
1047
01:29:00,949 --> 01:29:05,045
She put me on a pedestal,
poor thing.
1048
01:29:05,086 --> 01:29:07,611
She sees me as...
1049
01:29:07,656 --> 01:29:09,920
- This...
- This what?
1050
01:29:11,059 --> 01:29:12,959
Give it up!
1051
01:29:15,163 --> 01:29:17,961
She kissed me, I didn't kiss her.
1052
01:29:17,999 --> 01:29:22,629
You never do anything, do you?
1053
01:29:22,671 --> 01:29:24,536
You got dumped and you got kissed!
1054
01:29:24,572 --> 01:29:27,006
- By an adolescent!
- So?
1055
01:29:27,042 --> 01:29:28,475
l'm an adolescent.
1056
01:29:28,510 --> 01:29:30,341
Guys don't count.
1057
01:29:32,747 --> 01:29:36,148
We've got a big problem,
so what do we do?
1058
01:29:36,184 --> 01:29:37,549
What do you do?
1059
01:29:37,585 --> 01:29:39,576
You're the creative one.
1060
01:29:39,621 --> 01:29:42,784
You'll find a unique way out of this.
1061
01:29:44,192 --> 01:29:45,784
Any suggestions?
1062
01:29:48,596 --> 01:29:51,463
Take that shirt off,
you look ridiculous.
1063
01:29:52,667 --> 01:29:55,329
- Are you back together?
- Please!
1064
01:29:55,370 --> 01:30:00,467
lt would be way wrong
if you got back together with him.
1065
01:30:00,508 --> 01:30:02,533
We all stick together now.
1066
01:30:02,577 --> 01:30:06,377
We're sleeping and going out together.
I want a strawberry smoothie!
1067
01:30:54,729 --> 01:30:58,426
I couldn't see any shooting stars
from over there.
1068
01:31:21,055 --> 01:31:23,319
lt's cold, put this on.
1069
01:31:31,666 --> 01:31:33,896
Can we talk about our relationship?
1070
01:31:34,936 --> 01:31:36,460
What relationship?
1071
01:31:41,609 --> 01:31:43,873
Look at all the stars.
1072
01:31:44,946 --> 01:31:47,642
They're millions of light years away.
1073
01:31:47,682 --> 01:31:51,311
We sure are insignificant
in this universe.
1074
01:31:52,353 --> 01:31:54,184
Speak for yourself.
1075
01:31:54,222 --> 01:31:56,087
Excuse me!
1076
01:32:13,775 --> 01:32:16,403
They're cute, aren't they?
l'm happy for her.
1077
01:32:16,444 --> 01:32:20,141
She's seems to be doing good.
1078
01:32:20,181 --> 01:32:22,843
Quiet!
l've had enough of you!
1079
01:32:22,884 --> 01:32:26,047
She's fine one day
and a mess the next!
1080
01:32:26,087 --> 01:32:29,955
She's 15.
So what if she has a bad day?
1081
01:32:29,991 --> 01:32:33,518
Stop it, we're all getting along now.
1082
01:32:33,561 --> 01:32:37,088
Who?
What kind of tour group are we?
1083
01:32:37,131 --> 01:32:39,998
We've got a walking time bomb,
every girl's best friend,
1084
01:32:40,034 --> 01:32:42,366
and let's not even mention
you and me!
1085
01:32:42,403 --> 01:32:44,394
- I feel sick.
- What's wrong?
1086
01:32:44,439 --> 01:32:47,897
- I just heard myself speak.
- So?
1087
01:32:47,942 --> 01:32:50,376
l'm boring!
1088
01:32:50,411 --> 01:32:52,140
l'm boring!
1089
01:32:52,180 --> 01:32:54,205
I even bore myself!
1090
01:32:54,249 --> 01:32:56,479
- She's weird.
- Yeah.
1091
01:32:56,517 --> 01:32:58,041
She's always been.
1092
01:32:58,086 --> 01:33:00,281
Why are you so melodramatic?
1093
01:33:00,321 --> 01:33:04,815
I analyzed my own self
and defined myself ''the bitch''!
1094
01:33:04,859 --> 01:33:07,089
Wouldn't that upset you?
1095
01:33:07,128 --> 01:33:10,620
From the outside
our relationship is a mess!
1096
01:33:10,665 --> 01:33:13,156
You wanted to change me
and I wanted to change you.
1097
01:33:13,201 --> 01:33:18,229
You never know what to say
and l'm always judging everyone!
1098
01:33:18,273 --> 01:33:21,106
That's why people like you.
1099
01:33:21,142 --> 01:33:23,042
- Because you're so...
- What?
1100
01:33:23,077 --> 01:33:24,237
Say it!
A...
1101
01:33:24,279 --> 01:33:26,907
I wasn't going to say ''bitch''!
1102
01:33:26,948 --> 01:33:29,746
No one likes me!
1103
01:33:29,784 --> 01:33:33,276
And now I don't even like myself.
1104
01:33:33,321 --> 01:33:35,016
I do everything wrong!
1105
01:33:35,056 --> 01:33:37,422
Always dieting, I never lose weight.
1106
01:33:37,458 --> 01:33:41,087
- Now I quit dieting and...
- You've gained weight.
1107
01:33:41,129 --> 01:33:42,824
- l've lost weight!
- That's good!
1108
01:33:42,864 --> 01:33:44,195
No, it isn't!
1109
01:33:44,232 --> 01:33:48,999
lt means l've done everything wrong.
I hide and eat, I was lying to myself.
1110
01:33:55,710 --> 01:34:01,376
I know you, you're angry at me
because of that night.
1111
01:34:01,416 --> 01:34:04,977
- What night?
- That night with you-know-who.
1112
01:34:05,019 --> 01:34:07,419
- Who?
- Silvia.
1113
01:34:07,455 --> 01:34:10,151
Can we talk about it?
1114
01:34:11,192 --> 01:34:12,887
Sure, let's talk about it.
1115
01:34:12,927 --> 01:34:16,863
Let's hold each other all night
and it will be fine tomorrow.
1116
01:34:16,898 --> 01:34:19,958
Go do that shit with your sex bomb!
1117
01:34:35,049 --> 01:34:38,246
At least give me credit for trying.
1118
01:34:38,286 --> 01:34:40,379
l'm trying to be honest.
1119
01:34:40,421 --> 01:34:45,154
You've told me a sack of lies
and now you want to be honest?
1120
01:34:45,193 --> 01:34:47,320
What do I care now?
1121
01:34:50,465 --> 01:34:53,457
But I do have one question.
1122
01:34:54,502 --> 01:34:57,027
- Promise you'll tell the truth.
- I promise.
1123
01:34:57,071 --> 01:34:59,335
Ask me.
1124
01:35:03,945 --> 01:35:06,778
Was Silvia better than me in bed?
1125
01:35:13,121 --> 01:35:16,488
She's just more sex-oriented.
1126
01:35:16,524 --> 01:35:20,085
- She's got natural abilities.
- So she was better than me?
1127
01:35:20,128 --> 01:35:24,224
- Yes, because she really likes it...
- Why did you tell me?
1128
01:35:27,168 --> 01:35:29,329
But I like it with you much better!
1129
01:35:29,370 --> 01:35:33,136
With her l'm always worried
about my performance because...
1130
01:35:36,944 --> 01:35:39,913
- Did I hurt you?
- A little.
1131
01:35:39,947 --> 01:35:42,177
Good.
1132
01:35:43,251 --> 01:35:46,186
- Can I do my thing?
- No, not that.
1133
01:35:46,220 --> 01:35:49,018
You're saying that because l'm sad.
1134
01:35:49,057 --> 01:35:51,890
No, l'm serious.
I want to.
1135
01:35:51,926 --> 01:35:54,292
Well, I don't.
1136
01:35:54,328 --> 01:35:56,319
Bitch.
1137
01:36:44,745 --> 01:36:49,114
So like I didn't get deflowered
but it's still cool.
1138
01:36:49,150 --> 01:36:54,178
When I get back to school
everyone will be all: ''I did it''.
1139
01:36:54,222 --> 01:36:56,713
Their stories will be way identical.
1140
01:36:56,757 --> 01:37:00,818
But my story is like totally unique.
1141
01:37:03,865 --> 01:37:05,457
lt doesn't matter.
1142
01:37:16,644 --> 01:37:20,273
I have a question
and I want an honest answer.
1143
01:37:20,314 --> 01:37:23,579
What is this, honesty night?
1144
01:37:23,618 --> 01:37:29,250
lf you hadn't fallen asleep that night,
would you have made love to me?
1145
01:37:36,164 --> 01:37:38,428
Just chill, I wouldn't have done it!
1146
01:37:40,601 --> 01:37:43,832
Your first time can't be
with someone you like.
1147
01:39:00,214 --> 01:39:04,514
I was totally sure you'd
get back together with him.
1148
01:39:04,552 --> 01:39:07,988
- Oh, please.
- But you didn't do it.
1149
01:39:09,457 --> 01:39:12,187
l'll give you credit for that.
1150
01:39:12,226 --> 01:39:15,354
You proved you're not a wimp.
1151
01:39:15,396 --> 01:39:19,856
lt was obvious he was waiting
for you to go: ''Okay''.
1152
01:39:19,900 --> 01:39:23,028
- You held out!
- See?
1153
01:39:44,792 --> 01:39:46,987
You taught me that a woman
1154
01:39:47,028 --> 01:39:51,727
doesn't have to put her ideals aside
for the man of her life!
1155
01:39:51,766 --> 01:39:53,563
Exactly.
1156
01:39:53,601 --> 01:39:56,195
ldeals are way important.
1157
01:39:58,706 --> 01:40:01,539
There are exceptions, you know.
1158
01:40:11,285 --> 01:40:13,480
I want off!
1159
01:40:13,521 --> 01:40:17,321
I have to get off, it's important!
1160
01:40:17,358 --> 01:40:19,724
Captain!
1161
01:41:31,599 --> 01:41:34,898
- No, it doesn't count!
- Why doesn't it count?
1162
01:41:34,935 --> 01:41:37,403
Because I said so.
1163
01:41:37,438 --> 01:41:39,633
l'm doing it for me, not for you.
1164
01:41:49,950 --> 01:41:52,009
With me, you can...
1165
01:41:52,052 --> 01:41:54,350
..smoke your pipe when you want.
1166
01:41:54,388 --> 01:41:58,757
Because I like you much more...
1167
01:41:58,793 --> 01:42:04,493
..so romantic!
1168
01:42:04,532 --> 01:42:08,434
Blue smoke!
1169
01:42:08,469 --> 01:42:12,200
Oh, a cloud inside you.
1170
01:42:12,239 --> 01:42:16,232
And a man who smells like smoke...
1171
01:42:16,277 --> 01:42:20,509
..is a real man, oh yes!
1172
01:42:20,548 --> 01:42:24,951
I will love you,
as long as you want!
1173
01:42:24,985 --> 01:42:28,716
Because that is what you are!
1174
01:42:32,226 --> 01:42:34,956
- A man is a man.
- When he smells like smoke.
1175
01:42:36,297 --> 01:42:38,959
- A man is a man.
- When he smells like smoke...
1176
01:42:40,768 --> 01:42:44,226
A kiss is ten times better from you!
1177
01:43:55,543 --> 01:43:57,841
- Wait.
- What?
1178
01:43:57,878 --> 01:43:59,470
- I have to fold my clothes.
- Okay.
1179
01:43:59,513 --> 01:44:02,505
No!
You have to say no sometimes!
1180
01:44:02,550 --> 01:44:04,279
Whatever.
1181
01:44:07,087 --> 01:44:12,252
lf two obsessive people are together,
at least they don't hurt anyone else.
1182
01:44:12,293 --> 01:44:15,626
No, that's the typical
S&M relationship.
1183
01:44:15,663 --> 01:44:17,927
As if you knew!
You're a virgin!
1184
01:44:17,965 --> 01:44:22,493
- So are you!
- That's normal for my age.
1185
01:44:29,777 --> 01:44:34,305
- So you and I are just friends?
- No, we will never be friends!
80552
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