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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:02:28,595 --> 00:02:31,530 THE THINGS WE HAVE IN COMMON 2 00:02:31,565 --> 00:02:34,295 l'm not that weird. 3 00:02:34,334 --> 00:02:39,636 Some of my ideas might sound a little weird, but... 4 00:02:40,640 --> 00:02:43,006 She's obsessed! 5 00:02:43,043 --> 00:02:46,342 Go ahead and nod, but she is. 6 00:02:46,379 --> 00:02:50,247 What happens to unworn clothes? 7 00:02:50,283 --> 00:02:52,478 She goes crazy every season. 8 00:02:52,519 --> 00:02:54,111 Her clothes won't fit! 9 00:02:54,154 --> 00:02:58,090 Wool is made from elastic fibers, it shrinks. 10 00:02:58,124 --> 00:03:01,924 She didn't gain weight, her clothes shrunk! 11 00:03:01,962 --> 00:03:04,624 Chocolate is not fattening. 12 00:03:04,664 --> 00:03:07,565 lt helps you lose weight. 13 00:03:07,601 --> 00:03:11,833 The energy makes you more active and you burn fat. 14 00:03:11,872 --> 00:03:15,433 She pigs out on chocolate every night. 15 00:03:15,475 --> 00:03:18,638 lt's my fault she gains weight. 16 00:03:18,678 --> 00:03:21,272 I put too much oil on her salad! 17 00:03:21,314 --> 00:03:24,112 Pictures change. 18 00:03:24,150 --> 00:03:26,209 At first you hate yourself. 19 00:03:26,253 --> 00:03:29,279 Months later you realize you've changed. 20 00:03:29,322 --> 00:03:31,688 What are you like in pictures? 21 00:03:31,725 --> 00:03:34,558 You are what you are! 22 00:03:34,594 --> 00:03:37,791 A few months later, you are what you were. 23 00:03:37,831 --> 00:03:38,991 Big deal! 24 00:03:39,032 --> 00:03:42,627 Pictures improve with time. 25 00:03:42,669 --> 00:03:45,638 Okay, so we get older... 26 00:03:45,672 --> 00:03:48,539 But I don't want to face that. 27 00:03:48,575 --> 00:03:52,511 Life is too short to waste on mistakes. 28 00:03:52,546 --> 00:03:56,277 You have to plan everything to a ''T''. 29 00:03:56,316 --> 00:04:01,413 Life is too short to waste on planning everything. 30 00:04:01,454 --> 00:04:03,854 You gotta be flexible! 31 00:04:03,890 --> 00:04:07,656 The only way to keep control is to be organized. 32 00:04:07,694 --> 00:04:09,662 The only way to keep control is to be unorganized. 33 00:04:09,696 --> 00:04:13,188 The only way to keep control... 34 00:04:13,233 --> 00:04:16,031 - is to be unorganized. - You're right. 35 00:04:16,069 --> 00:04:17,969 I lost my lighter. 36 00:04:18,004 --> 00:04:23,135 Being jealous means you're afraid to lose the other person. 37 00:04:23,176 --> 00:04:26,873 Being jealous means you don't trust the other person. 38 00:04:26,913 --> 00:04:30,178 So when you're jealous, it's love! 39 00:04:30,216 --> 00:04:34,676 lf there's no trust, you're not in love! 40 00:04:36,323 --> 00:04:39,258 THEY DON'T MAKE LOVE LIKE THEY USED TO 41 00:04:57,043 --> 00:05:00,308 - When did you find out? - At the video store. 42 00:05:00,347 --> 00:05:04,681 I pick a movie and Andrea says we've seen it. 43 00:05:04,718 --> 00:05:07,846 Maybe he saw it, but I didn't! 44 00:05:07,887 --> 00:05:12,824 He starts making up crap, saying someone lent him that movie. 45 00:05:12,859 --> 00:05:16,192 Then I remembered we never saw that movie 46 00:05:16,229 --> 00:05:18,163 because it was playing at Mignon. 47 00:05:18,198 --> 00:05:21,793 - Who takes your tickets at Mignon? - Silvia, his ex! 48 00:05:21,835 --> 00:05:23,735 Of course he denies everything. 49 00:05:23,770 --> 00:05:27,831 He didn't go there to see the movie, he went there to see... 50 00:05:27,874 --> 00:05:30,172 - The sex bomb. - So, I decided. 51 00:05:30,210 --> 00:05:32,678 There is a lack of trust here! 52 00:05:32,712 --> 00:05:36,011 So I go: ''What else has he hid from me?'' 53 00:05:36,049 --> 00:05:39,644 He goes: ''I hate jealousy. Change or it's over.'' 54 00:05:39,686 --> 00:05:43,588 So I go: ''l'm not changing, it's over.'' 55 00:05:43,623 --> 00:05:47,184 Since he's a wimp, he gave in. 56 00:05:47,227 --> 00:05:50,685 Love means leaving room for mistakes. 57 00:05:50,730 --> 00:05:51,719 No. 58 00:05:51,765 --> 00:05:54,256 Love means never having to say: ''I told you so''. 59 00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:56,029 Well, I told him so. 60 00:05:56,069 --> 00:05:58,094 Ex's are just that: Ex! 61 00:06:02,308 --> 00:06:04,003 Andrea. 62 00:06:04,044 --> 00:06:08,811 We said we either get married or break up. 63 00:06:08,848 --> 00:06:10,941 So we broke up. 64 00:06:10,984 --> 00:06:15,216 But there's one thing I don't get. 65 00:06:15,255 --> 00:06:17,120 Who broke up with who? 66 00:06:17,157 --> 00:06:22,220 lf I broke up with you, it's my own fault. 67 00:06:22,262 --> 00:06:25,663 But if you broke up with me... 68 00:06:25,699 --> 00:06:27,098 Pick up the phone! 69 00:06:27,133 --> 00:06:29,431 l'm not calling to argue. 70 00:07:19,886 --> 00:07:22,047 There's someone in here! 71 00:07:23,623 --> 00:07:25,853 lt's gonna be a while! 72 00:07:39,472 --> 00:07:41,531 l'm just here to say bon voyage. 73 00:07:41,574 --> 00:07:46,136 Mother says no more girl scout trips because it's time to mature. 74 00:07:46,179 --> 00:07:51,708 I need to travel and have my own experiences. 75 00:07:53,019 --> 00:07:55,613 Guys, let's go! 76 00:07:55,655 --> 00:07:58,283 Proceed, I don't want to delay you. 77 00:07:58,324 --> 00:08:00,656 You didn't see me here! 78 00:08:11,004 --> 00:08:13,336 Hello, Mother. Ciao. 79 00:08:13,373 --> 00:08:16,035 No, everything is fine. 80 00:08:16,075 --> 00:08:19,135 I couldn't find them. 81 00:08:19,179 --> 00:08:22,637 Quit going ballistic, the train was late! 82 00:08:22,682 --> 00:08:25,515 I know, but... 83 00:08:25,552 --> 00:08:27,076 I have a wicked idea! 84 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:30,214 I can get an lnter Rail ticket. 85 00:08:30,256 --> 00:08:34,090 l'll travel Europe and have my own experiences. 86 00:08:36,129 --> 00:08:37,824 I won't ruin your vacation! 87 00:08:40,266 --> 00:08:41,756 l'm almost 15! 88 00:08:41,801 --> 00:08:44,668 Good job, Martina. You act older. 89 00:08:44,704 --> 00:08:48,162 I know, l'm mature for my age. 90 00:08:48,208 --> 00:08:51,006 But call me Meggy. 91 00:08:51,044 --> 00:08:53,342 Martina sounds old! Thanks. 92 00:08:53,379 --> 00:08:56,507 Meggy isn't even short for Martina. 93 00:08:56,549 --> 00:08:58,141 Like I know! lt's way unfair. 94 00:09:01,020 --> 00:09:04,183 Granny said that Mother said 95 00:09:04,224 --> 00:09:07,250 I could stay at your house since you got dumped 96 00:09:07,293 --> 00:09:09,193 and weren't going anywhere. 97 00:09:09,229 --> 00:09:11,026 What? I dumped him! 98 00:09:11,064 --> 00:09:15,023 I made all the decisions, as usual. 99 00:09:15,068 --> 00:09:18,936 Can't they mind their own business? 100 00:09:18,972 --> 00:09:22,931 You don't have a book, do you? 101 00:09:22,976 --> 00:09:24,739 l'm not that stereotypical! 102 00:09:24,777 --> 00:09:28,372 - I have a book. - Take another one. 103 00:09:30,750 --> 00:09:34,186 Give me the one I have to read for summer homework. 104 00:09:34,220 --> 00:09:35,949 Sure! 105 00:09:35,989 --> 00:09:39,390 That one about teen angst... 106 00:09:39,425 --> 00:09:42,223 - Young Holden? - No... 107 00:09:42,262 --> 00:09:44,321 - Young Turles? - No... 108 00:09:44,364 --> 00:09:47,128 - Young Werther? - Yes, that one. 109 00:09:47,166 --> 00:09:48,929 They still make kids read those? 110 00:09:53,473 --> 00:09:57,375 - 285! - Come on! 111 00:09:57,410 --> 00:09:59,640 The German version is in there too. 112 00:10:01,147 --> 00:10:06,084 I lived with a guy for 8 years who used his mother's bank account! 113 00:10:06,119 --> 00:10:10,317 I had to thank his mother too for gifts he got me. 114 00:10:10,356 --> 00:10:13,723 He couldn't make a decision! 115 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:19,027 When you ask him a question you have to answer it too. 116 00:10:19,065 --> 00:10:23,525 How could I diet when he always cooked me things? 117 00:10:24,504 --> 00:10:28,463 - You said we'd split it! - No, this is the last piece. 118 00:10:28,508 --> 00:10:30,066 This is the Peace Pie. 119 00:10:30,109 --> 00:10:34,011 Andrea made it whenever we argued. 120 00:10:34,047 --> 00:10:35,981 Then we'd make up. 121 00:10:36,015 --> 00:10:38,040 There's ice cream in the freezer. 122 00:10:40,720 --> 00:10:44,053 This is good because of its secret ingredient. 123 00:10:44,090 --> 00:10:45,921 Actually there are two. 124 00:10:45,959 --> 00:10:47,927 Ginger and cinnamon. 125 00:10:47,961 --> 00:10:49,792 He couldn't even decide on that. 126 00:10:49,829 --> 00:10:54,391 - There's only one secret ingredient. - Got a picture of Andrea? 127 00:10:54,434 --> 00:10:56,766 ln the trash. 128 00:10:56,803 --> 00:10:59,966 Under there, in the trash. 129 00:11:00,006 --> 00:11:04,909 Are you nuts? You trashed 8 years of pictures! 130 00:11:04,944 --> 00:11:07,037 Only where you could see him. 131 00:11:19,859 --> 00:11:22,419 The world passed right by us! 132 00:11:22,462 --> 00:11:26,364 People got married and the cute guys came out of the closet. 133 00:11:26,399 --> 00:11:30,893 lt's not my fault the train broke and I was late! 134 00:11:30,937 --> 00:11:35,169 Scout camp could have been a major educational experience! 135 00:11:35,208 --> 00:11:37,972 You can't dump someone after 8 years! 136 00:11:38,011 --> 00:11:40,138 Especially at your age! 137 00:11:40,179 --> 00:11:44,946 You wanna be free but you're too young. 138 00:11:44,984 --> 00:11:49,614 When you are free, you're too old to enjoy it! 139 00:11:59,332 --> 00:12:03,996 As if I would go with you and those wrinkly old farts! 140 00:12:04,037 --> 00:12:08,303 As it is, our hometown reeks! 141 00:12:09,842 --> 00:12:12,606 You don't trust me. 142 00:12:12,645 --> 00:12:17,776 Sibilla Balzarro went to the States by herself when she was 1 3! 143 00:12:19,652 --> 00:12:22,018 Yes, I would jump off a bridge if she did! 144 00:12:22,055 --> 00:12:25,024 All teenagers copy each other. 145 00:12:25,058 --> 00:12:29,188 We lack major equilibrium, I didn't choose to be your daughter! 146 00:12:29,228 --> 00:12:31,924 You chose to be my mother! 147 00:12:31,964 --> 00:12:36,367 Your daughter needs to go on vacation with her friends. 148 00:12:36,402 --> 00:12:39,599 lf you won't take her because you're selfish, 149 00:12:39,639 --> 00:12:42,506 then l'll take my niece. 150 00:12:42,542 --> 00:12:45,636 Why? Why can't l go to scout camp? 151 00:12:47,680 --> 00:12:49,443 You know what l'm like? 152 00:12:49,482 --> 00:12:51,609 What are you like? 153 00:12:51,651 --> 00:12:55,246 Martina is staying with me. 154 00:12:55,288 --> 00:12:57,119 lt's Meggy, not Martina. 155 00:12:57,156 --> 00:13:00,648 Whatever. Have a nice trip. 156 00:13:00,693 --> 00:13:03,560 Your mother is terrible! 157 00:13:03,596 --> 00:13:06,258 l have to live with her all year. 158 00:13:06,299 --> 00:13:08,290 How can we be sisters? 159 00:13:13,473 --> 00:13:15,703 l'll take you, if you want. 160 00:13:15,741 --> 00:13:17,299 Where are these girl scouts? 161 00:13:18,911 --> 00:13:22,972 l'm not waiting for Andrea's call. 162 00:13:23,015 --> 00:13:25,848 My friends are in Greece. 163 00:13:25,885 --> 00:13:28,820 Nice, especially since you're taking classical studies. 164 00:13:28,855 --> 00:13:30,982 Where exactly? 165 00:13:31,023 --> 00:13:33,389 los, in the Cyclades. 166 00:13:37,363 --> 00:13:39,558 Beaches, hot sun... 167 00:13:41,601 --> 00:13:43,694 Sorry, l can't. 168 00:13:43,736 --> 00:13:48,901 l break out in a rash if l get too much sun. 169 00:13:53,279 --> 00:13:55,873 Stop looking at me like that. 170 00:13:55,915 --> 00:13:58,042 Don't you dare cry! 171 00:14:14,367 --> 00:14:17,359 Stefy! Over here. 172 00:14:19,105 --> 00:14:22,165 Everyone's feet stinks! 173 00:14:22,208 --> 00:14:24,574 There's fresh air over here. 174 00:15:03,416 --> 00:15:05,748 l love you, Auntie! 175 00:15:05,785 --> 00:15:08,310 That's sweet of you. 176 00:15:08,354 --> 00:15:11,915 Too bad we never hang out, you're a nice person. 177 00:15:11,958 --> 00:15:14,654 No, l'm not. 178 00:15:14,694 --> 00:15:17,288 l'm like a total liar. 179 00:15:17,330 --> 00:15:21,994 l try to tell the truth, but something else comes out. 180 00:15:22,034 --> 00:15:25,902 lt's because of your mother! 181 00:15:36,682 --> 00:15:39,515 l missed the train on purpose. 182 00:15:39,552 --> 00:15:42,077 l'm mature enough to be on my own. 183 00:15:42,121 --> 00:15:44,521 Never mind. 184 00:15:44,557 --> 00:15:47,219 Once you see your friends it won't be a lie anymore. 185 00:15:47,260 --> 00:15:49,751 Sweet dreams. 186 00:15:49,795 --> 00:15:52,389 l sort of like told another lie... 187 00:15:52,431 --> 00:15:55,764 But l can't tell you, 'cause you'd get mad. 188 00:16:02,341 --> 00:16:04,639 l won't get angry. 189 00:16:09,915 --> 00:16:13,646 My friends aren't in Greece, they're in Spain. 190 00:16:13,686 --> 00:16:17,679 l caused this royal mess to go to los. 191 00:16:17,723 --> 00:16:21,625 The island of love, it's always been my dream! 192 00:16:21,661 --> 00:16:24,459 And there l will lose my virginity. 193 00:16:24,497 --> 00:16:26,465 lf not there, where? 194 00:16:26,499 --> 00:16:29,263 Who said you have to? 195 00:16:29,302 --> 00:16:32,100 lt's a big deal for me! 196 00:16:32,138 --> 00:16:36,040 Guys get turned off because they can tell l'm still a virgin! 197 00:16:48,220 --> 00:16:51,451 Stop staring, go back to sleep! 198 00:16:51,490 --> 00:16:54,118 You sleep, l have to learn! 199 00:17:27,093 --> 00:17:28,822 Now what? 200 00:17:28,861 --> 00:17:31,329 Do you hate me now that l told you the truth? 201 00:17:34,767 --> 00:17:37,930 You grownups always want us to lie behind your backs. 202 00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:41,269 You're like Mother, 203 00:17:41,307 --> 00:17:43,241 you can't handle the truth! 204 00:17:44,810 --> 00:17:49,611 l'm in charge of you now, this is too big of a responsibility. 205 00:17:49,648 --> 00:17:52,276 l can handle the truth. 206 00:17:52,318 --> 00:17:56,220 lt's that you want to do it with a complete stranger! 207 00:17:56,255 --> 00:17:59,053 Listen to me! 208 00:17:59,091 --> 00:18:02,822 lt will be horrible and you'll remember it forever. 209 00:18:02,862 --> 00:18:07,265 No. l'm going to have a triple orgasm. 210 00:18:09,902 --> 00:18:12,336 l read all about it. 211 00:18:12,371 --> 00:18:15,397 You have to be relaxed. 212 00:18:17,610 --> 00:18:20,738 You have to practice first. 213 00:18:20,780 --> 00:18:25,877 So when you fall in love you don't give a bad impression! 214 00:18:25,918 --> 00:18:28,546 What kind of logic is that? 215 00:18:28,587 --> 00:18:30,817 That's my philosophy. 216 00:18:54,079 --> 00:18:57,276 How old were you the first time you did it? 217 00:18:57,316 --> 00:19:00,376 You do it when you're ready. 218 00:19:00,419 --> 00:19:02,717 Okay, l was 19. 219 00:19:02,755 --> 00:19:05,656 Were you in love? 220 00:19:05,691 --> 00:19:08,353 Of course. 221 00:19:08,394 --> 00:19:10,988 How was it? 222 00:19:11,030 --> 00:19:15,490 - lt just was! - See? 223 00:19:15,534 --> 00:19:18,526 You were in love and it sucked. 224 00:19:18,571 --> 00:19:22,803 - lt was my first time! - You should have done it before. 225 00:19:22,842 --> 00:19:25,834 - Before what? - Before the first time. 226 00:20:11,257 --> 00:20:13,384 Do you only do weird things? 227 00:20:13,425 --> 00:20:16,053 You eat dessert before your meal? 228 00:20:16,095 --> 00:20:18,723 Who decides what's normal? 229 00:20:18,764 --> 00:20:22,097 Weren't you on a diet? 230 00:20:22,134 --> 00:20:24,762 Chocolate makes you lose weight. 231 00:20:30,109 --> 00:20:32,600 l knew it! 232 00:20:32,645 --> 00:20:35,478 lt's exactly like Andrea's cake! 233 00:20:35,514 --> 00:20:37,573 Some secret! They make it here. 234 00:20:37,616 --> 00:20:39,584 lt's really good, though. 235 00:20:39,618 --> 00:20:43,110 Not as good as his. 236 00:20:44,590 --> 00:20:46,421 What are you doing? 237 00:20:46,458 --> 00:20:50,588 My head has to be in the North or l can't sleep. 238 00:20:50,629 --> 00:20:52,859 Get up, l need to move the bed. 239 00:21:07,980 --> 00:21:11,814 - ls this your summer homework? - Yes. 240 00:21:11,850 --> 00:21:14,751 What if he does tantric sex? 241 00:21:14,787 --> 00:21:17,688 l'll have to do it for 5 hours! 242 00:21:17,723 --> 00:21:19,691 You have a serious problem. 243 00:21:19,725 --> 00:21:22,660 l know, my hormones are out of control. 244 00:21:22,695 --> 00:21:23,923 Let's go to the beach! 245 00:21:23,963 --> 00:21:26,295 No, the sun is too hot. 246 00:21:26,332 --> 00:21:28,197 Let's take a nap. 247 00:21:28,233 --> 00:21:30,758 l'm almost 15, l'll sleep when l'm old. 248 00:22:11,043 --> 00:22:14,501 There's your last chance. 249 00:22:14,546 --> 00:22:17,242 - She must be 30! - Exactly. 250 00:22:17,282 --> 00:22:20,149 Wouldn't you put out at her age? 251 00:22:20,185 --> 00:22:22,312 lf l was a woman l'd put out non-stop. 252 00:22:35,334 --> 00:22:37,962 ltalian? 253 00:22:38,003 --> 00:22:40,403 l'm Marco, this is Pippo. 254 00:22:40,439 --> 00:22:42,999 Stefania, nice to meet you. This is my niece Meggy. 255 00:22:43,042 --> 00:22:47,001 Where is everyone on this island? 256 00:22:47,046 --> 00:22:49,879 - What are we? - l mean everyone... 257 00:22:49,915 --> 00:22:52,349 They party at night and sleep all day. 258 00:22:52,384 --> 00:22:55,717 And you losers go to bed early. 259 00:22:55,754 --> 00:22:57,517 Don't you want a tan? 260 00:22:57,556 --> 00:23:01,458 The sun is bad for you at this time of day. 261 00:23:01,493 --> 00:23:05,554 l get polymorphous light eruption. 262 00:23:12,604 --> 00:23:14,834 Are you going to the Scorpion tonight? 263 00:23:14,873 --> 00:23:16,568 Yuck! 264 00:23:16,608 --> 00:23:18,974 Only toddlers go there! 265 00:23:21,447 --> 00:23:25,679 Since you insist on talking to us, let's take a test. 266 00:23:26,685 --> 00:23:29,119 ''What are you like in bed?'' 267 00:23:29,154 --> 00:23:32,612 ''A friend invites you to a partouze.'' 268 00:23:32,658 --> 00:23:35,525 - What's that? - An orgy. 269 00:23:37,296 --> 00:23:38,285 ''What do you do?'' 270 00:23:38,330 --> 00:23:40,594 A. You are shocked and decline. 271 00:23:40,632 --> 00:23:43,567 B. You go check it out. 272 00:23:43,602 --> 00:23:47,003 C. You plan the next one at your house. 273 00:23:47,039 --> 00:23:51,271 A. l am shocked and decline. 274 00:23:51,310 --> 00:23:54,006 - Right? - Well, it depends. 275 00:23:55,347 --> 00:23:58,145 C. The next one would be at my house. 276 00:23:58,183 --> 00:24:01,812 - How would you know? - That's why l choose C! 277 00:24:01,854 --> 00:24:04,288 - l choose C too. Pippo? - C. 278 00:24:05,491 --> 00:24:08,824 We get five points. Stefania... zero! 279 00:24:10,496 --> 00:24:13,829 ''How do you feel about someone watching you have sex?'' 280 00:24:13,866 --> 00:24:15,731 ''A. Major turn-on''. l pick A. 281 00:24:15,768 --> 00:24:17,861 Read B and C! 282 00:24:17,903 --> 00:24:20,030 You just want the most points! 283 00:24:20,072 --> 00:24:22,700 Just chill! 284 00:24:22,741 --> 00:24:24,800 Enough talking, l want some action. 285 00:24:26,478 --> 00:24:28,776 Later l'll quiz you on oral sex. 286 00:24:28,814 --> 00:24:30,679 Where are you going? 287 00:24:30,716 --> 00:24:33,947 Are you sure you're related? 288 00:24:33,986 --> 00:24:35,954 Unfortunately. 289 00:24:35,988 --> 00:24:38,684 ls her best friend her mother? 290 00:24:38,724 --> 00:24:41,249 How do l know? Why? 291 00:24:41,293 --> 00:24:43,727 Girls like that are teases. 292 00:24:43,762 --> 00:24:45,593 Mothers are an important factor. 293 00:24:45,631 --> 00:24:48,293 They don't put out to rebel, they do it when they want to. 294 00:24:48,333 --> 00:24:51,530 Friendship has ruined it for us. 295 00:24:52,938 --> 00:24:56,499 - Mother is my best friend. - All you do is fight! 296 00:24:56,542 --> 00:24:58,908 Because of the fight on the phone? 297 00:24:58,944 --> 00:25:02,141 No, l have to go ballistic on her. 298 00:25:02,181 --> 00:25:06,481 Otherwise she thinks she isn't a good mother. 299 00:25:06,518 --> 00:25:10,614 - We talk about everything. - You can talk to me too. 300 00:25:12,090 --> 00:25:15,582 l don't want to be a normal old aunt. 301 00:25:15,627 --> 00:25:19,290 l want to be your friend. Do you? 302 00:25:19,331 --> 00:25:21,993 Menopause is lingering and l'm still a virgin! 303 00:25:22,034 --> 00:25:23,058 What? 304 00:25:25,604 --> 00:25:27,936 Andrea, it's me. 305 00:25:27,973 --> 00:25:30,840 Was being free a problem with us? 306 00:25:30,876 --> 00:25:33,037 l don't think it was. 307 00:25:33,078 --> 00:25:37,139 You went to Lucca in 1997 and l let you sleep there. 308 00:25:39,084 --> 00:25:40,574 And something else... 309 00:25:40,619 --> 00:25:44,680 if we had had children, what would we have been like? 310 00:25:44,723 --> 00:25:47,283 Being parents is a pain! 311 00:25:49,194 --> 00:25:52,459 Anyway, this freedom thing was a misconception. 312 00:25:52,497 --> 00:25:57,491 When you claimed l was holding back your freedom, l was actually... 313 00:25:57,536 --> 00:26:01,165 Well it was for your own good! 314 00:26:05,444 --> 00:26:07,776 Call me if you get this message. 315 00:26:07,813 --> 00:26:10,782 l'm in los, Cyclades. Greece! 316 00:26:10,816 --> 00:26:13,046 Some crazy teenager island! 317 00:26:13,085 --> 00:26:14,814 Write this number. 318 00:26:17,956 --> 00:26:21,483 Panorama Hotel. You can call collect! 319 00:26:25,230 --> 00:26:29,064 Are you not answering because you're screwing Silvia Magliocchetti? 320 00:26:29,101 --> 00:26:32,070 Or are you on vacation with her? 321 00:26:32,104 --> 00:26:34,766 ln either case, you and Silvia can both fuck off! 322 00:26:34,806 --> 00:26:36,068 You idiot! 323 00:27:34,366 --> 00:27:37,164 l could have popped a blood vessel! 324 00:27:59,491 --> 00:28:01,391 You're coming with me. 325 00:28:01,426 --> 00:28:03,257 - Why? - Who is this? 326 00:28:03,295 --> 00:28:05,525 - How would l know? - And you're kissing him? 327 00:28:05,564 --> 00:28:07,998 How else can l get to know him? 328 00:28:08,033 --> 00:28:10,433 Will you get moving! 329 00:28:10,469 --> 00:28:13,768 lf l only have to make out, l'm set. 330 00:28:13,805 --> 00:28:18,174 When l was little l made up new forms of kissing. 331 00:28:18,210 --> 00:28:22,306 The penguin, butterfly, chipmunk. 332 00:28:25,617 --> 00:28:28,142 l was Epicurean and didn't know it! 333 00:28:28,186 --> 00:28:30,677 We hadn't even studied philosophy yet. 334 00:28:32,958 --> 00:28:35,256 l wasn't even into that guy. 335 00:28:40,999 --> 00:28:43,365 Can l talk about Epicurus? 336 00:28:43,402 --> 00:28:46,769 Epicurus was all: 337 00:28:46,805 --> 00:28:51,174 ''The liberation of your passions is the path to happiness. 338 00:28:51,209 --> 00:28:53,473 Through philosophy... 339 00:28:53,512 --> 00:28:57,812 man frees himself from all grievous sentiments.'' 340 00:29:04,790 --> 00:29:08,191 - Have you guys seen Meggy? - She went swimming. 341 00:29:08,226 --> 00:29:10,319 - By herself? - Yeah. She'll be fine. 342 00:29:10,362 --> 00:29:12,523 Have a seat. 343 00:29:14,633 --> 00:29:16,624 - Want a beer? - At breakfast? 344 00:29:16,668 --> 00:29:19,637 l'd probably puke. 345 00:29:24,643 --> 00:29:26,508 See what l mean? 346 00:29:28,647 --> 00:29:32,208 l can't stand seeing everyone so relaxed! 347 00:29:32,250 --> 00:29:34,775 Have they done their summer homework? 348 00:30:04,015 --> 00:30:06,415 Selfish. 349 00:30:57,335 --> 00:31:00,361 THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS COINCIDENCE 350 00:31:19,324 --> 00:31:21,087 What's your name? 351 00:31:23,028 --> 00:31:24,689 Andrea. 352 00:31:24,729 --> 00:31:27,129 Huh? Aeneas? 353 00:31:27,165 --> 00:31:29,963 Uh, yeah. 354 00:31:30,001 --> 00:31:32,526 Fab! l got an A on The Aeneid! 355 00:31:57,963 --> 00:32:00,158 My name's Meggy. 356 00:32:03,535 --> 00:32:06,299 - What are you doing? - Drawing. 357 00:32:06,338 --> 00:32:10,365 Well, l'm learning how to draw. 358 00:32:12,377 --> 00:32:14,038 Are you here by yourself? 359 00:32:14,079 --> 00:32:16,741 Lucky you! On the island of love... 360 00:32:16,781 --> 00:32:19,147 Are you with your parents? 361 00:32:21,019 --> 00:32:24,955 - l'm with... - Your boyfriend? 362 00:32:26,358 --> 00:32:28,349 Yeah... l mean... 363 00:32:28,393 --> 00:32:30,418 No, he left. 364 00:32:30,462 --> 00:32:32,123 lt's not ''boyfriend''. 365 00:32:32,163 --> 00:32:34,495 lt's either ''remorse'' or ''regret''. 366 00:32:36,067 --> 00:32:38,058 Remorse, if you boinked. 367 00:32:38,103 --> 00:32:40,503 Regret, if you didn't. 368 00:32:40,538 --> 00:32:43,098 Which one is he? 369 00:32:43,141 --> 00:32:45,701 Remorse. 370 00:32:45,744 --> 00:32:48,907 l'm like way mature for my age. 371 00:32:52,651 --> 00:32:54,642 l'll be in the square tonight, will you? 372 00:33:16,274 --> 00:33:17,969 Hey! 373 00:33:20,178 --> 00:33:22,169 This scale is broken, right? 374 00:33:29,888 --> 00:33:32,880 l found him! The guy who's going to deflower me. 375 00:33:32,924 --> 00:33:36,416 He's gorgeous, funny and a major sex monster. 376 00:33:36,461 --> 00:33:38,759 Like the gay guy in Savage Garden. 377 00:33:38,797 --> 00:33:40,788 His name's Aeneas! Like in The Aeneid! 378 00:33:40,832 --> 00:33:42,891 Which one should l get? 379 00:33:42,934 --> 00:33:46,597 The colored ones are childish, l don't trust ''Super-Thin''. 380 00:33:46,638 --> 00:33:48,538 ''lncreased Duration''? 381 00:33:48,573 --> 00:33:50,632 He'll be self-conscious. ''Ribbed''? 382 00:33:50,675 --> 00:33:53,269 Not the first time! 383 00:33:53,311 --> 00:33:55,677 - Which one? - Get them all. 384 00:33:55,714 --> 00:33:57,375 Oh my God, really? 385 00:34:03,021 --> 00:34:07,014 Not all questions have specific answers. 386 00:34:07,058 --> 00:34:10,653 Ask a specific question and you get a specific answer. 387 00:34:10,695 --> 00:34:14,392 What do l do when my orgasm starts? 388 00:34:14,432 --> 00:34:16,559 Nothing! 389 00:34:16,601 --> 00:34:20,332 lf it happens, thank God and enjoy it! 390 00:34:20,372 --> 00:34:22,272 Does this embarrass you? 391 00:34:22,307 --> 00:34:25,674 - You're avoiding the question! - l am not! 392 00:34:25,710 --> 00:34:29,077 Does the word ''orgasm'' freak you out? 393 00:34:29,114 --> 00:34:32,140 lt's an actual scientific word! 394 00:34:32,183 --> 00:34:35,175 This is the island of love, no one would freak over it. 395 00:34:35,220 --> 00:34:37,984 This club is called 69. 396 00:34:38,022 --> 00:34:41,082 And they have a drink called Orgasm. 397 00:34:41,126 --> 00:34:44,527 - Orgasm! - l get the picture. 398 00:34:44,562 --> 00:34:47,622 - Relax. - No one is even looking! 399 00:34:51,569 --> 00:34:55,061 lf a dude asks you out, you can't say yes right away. 400 00:34:55,106 --> 00:34:57,939 You have to be all: ''l don't know...'' 401 00:34:57,976 --> 00:35:00,536 Make him sweat. 402 00:35:01,679 --> 00:35:04,705 - Did you say no to Aeneas? - He's different. 403 00:35:04,749 --> 00:35:07,411 He was too shy to ask me out. 404 00:35:07,452 --> 00:35:10,216 So l had to be all strategical. 405 00:35:10,255 --> 00:35:12,849 l was all: ''l'll be in the square tonight...'' 406 00:35:12,891 --> 00:35:17,294 l set it up without him feeling embarrassed. 407 00:35:17,328 --> 00:35:19,990 When are you meeting him? 408 00:35:20,031 --> 00:35:23,592 Don't people set exact times and places anymore? 409 00:35:29,974 --> 00:35:31,202 Oh my God, l miss him already. 410 00:35:31,242 --> 00:35:35,076 - Doesn't he have to sweat? - Like, right. 411 00:35:36,881 --> 00:35:39,076 You have to be way patient! 412 00:35:39,117 --> 00:35:42,518 Tell me about it. 413 00:36:13,985 --> 00:36:16,818 He's not coming. lt's 4:15. 414 00:36:16,855 --> 00:36:19,221 - lt's late! - lt's early! 415 00:36:19,257 --> 00:36:23,921 l'm tired. Let's go to bed. 416 00:36:23,962 --> 00:36:25,429 Go ahead! 417 00:36:27,765 --> 00:36:29,824 l'm like a total loser! 418 00:36:29,868 --> 00:36:32,132 l'm only into one guy on this island. 419 00:36:32,170 --> 00:36:34,195 And he stood me up! 420 00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,730 He could have told me! 421 00:36:36,774 --> 00:36:39,299 Men are never upfront with you. 422 00:36:39,344 --> 00:36:43,371 ln eight years Andrea couldn't say no. 423 00:36:43,414 --> 00:36:46,247 Always vague about everything. 424 00:36:46,284 --> 00:36:48,616 Let's change islands. 425 00:36:48,653 --> 00:36:51,417 They're either too young or too shitty around here. 426 00:36:51,456 --> 00:36:57,122 You want me to pack my bags because some jerk stood you up? 427 00:36:57,161 --> 00:36:59,925 - Yes. - Right. 428 00:37:49,147 --> 00:37:51,308 What's up? 429 00:37:51,349 --> 00:37:53,317 Hey, Potato Head. 430 00:37:57,555 --> 00:38:00,183 Sorry l couldn't make it last night. 431 00:38:03,227 --> 00:38:05,957 - Where? - Out to the square. 432 00:38:05,997 --> 00:38:09,899 - You said you'd come too. - Ah, the square. 433 00:38:09,934 --> 00:38:12,334 l was busy. 434 00:38:20,345 --> 00:38:22,939 - Well, later. - Later. 435 00:38:29,954 --> 00:38:31,615 Did you call me? 436 00:38:31,656 --> 00:38:33,146 No. 437 00:38:50,241 --> 00:38:52,072 - l got a present for you. - For me? 438 00:38:54,979 --> 00:38:56,970 Meggy will never read it. 439 00:38:57,015 --> 00:38:59,176 lsn't it all descriptions? 440 00:38:59,217 --> 00:39:01,583 No, the title is sad. 441 00:39:01,619 --> 00:39:05,783 A best-seller title would be ''The Loves of Young Werther''. 442 00:39:05,823 --> 00:39:09,782 We always have to read books about teen angst. 443 00:39:09,827 --> 00:39:12,125 - What's the deal? - What do you think? 444 00:39:12,163 --> 00:39:14,097 l know, we're young... 445 00:39:14,132 --> 00:39:16,692 You know what it's going to say. 446 00:39:16,734 --> 00:39:22,263 ''Young people think life is so bad, enjoy it while you can!'' 447 00:39:22,306 --> 00:39:24,968 ln one ear and out the other! 448 00:39:26,277 --> 00:39:28,575 Five more kilometers? 449 00:39:28,613 --> 00:39:32,743 There's no way, the sun's too hot. 450 00:39:32,784 --> 00:39:35,014 lt's Homer's tomb! 451 00:39:35,053 --> 00:39:37,647 Bart, Lisa and Marge might be there! 452 00:39:37,689 --> 00:39:40,658 What are you talking about? Don't you know ''Odyssey''? 453 00:39:40,692 --> 00:39:44,253 - Don't you know ''The Simpsons''? - What about them? 454 00:39:47,665 --> 00:39:49,690 We'll see the tomb another time. 455 00:39:49,734 --> 00:39:53,261 lt's not a tomb, it's a cenotaph. 456 00:39:53,304 --> 00:39:55,898 All this way and it's not even a tomb. 457 00:39:55,940 --> 00:39:58,238 Cenotaph, an empty tomb! 458 00:39:59,577 --> 00:40:01,636 Oh, it was a joke. 459 00:40:08,686 --> 00:40:12,019 Keep reading, geek. Maybe you'll learn something! 460 00:40:12,056 --> 00:40:15,116 - Fuck you! - You'd like that! 461 00:40:17,228 --> 00:40:19,822 Pippo makes me sick! 462 00:40:19,864 --> 00:40:21,923 Virgin is written all over his face. 463 00:40:21,966 --> 00:40:24,992 You look like you're going to a porn star convention! 464 00:40:25,036 --> 00:40:27,266 l wish l was! 465 00:40:27,305 --> 00:40:29,739 Maybe Aeneas would be nicer to me. 466 00:40:31,008 --> 00:40:33,943 Wait! You're always running. 467 00:40:33,978 --> 00:40:36,845 Not existing just sucks! 468 00:40:36,881 --> 00:40:40,180 l don't exist for him. l'm invisible! 469 00:40:42,286 --> 00:40:44,345 He called me ''Potato Head''! 470 00:40:44,388 --> 00:40:46,583 So? 471 00:40:46,624 --> 00:40:48,592 lt's a term of endearment. 472 00:40:48,626 --> 00:40:50,253 Know what he talked about? 473 00:40:50,294 --> 00:40:52,353 Cartoons! 474 00:40:52,396 --> 00:40:55,991 What will his next topic be? Barbie? 475 00:40:56,033 --> 00:40:59,628 l gave up cartoons a whole year ago! 476 00:40:59,670 --> 00:41:03,572 What's wrong with cartoons? 477 00:41:03,608 --> 00:41:06,042 Guys grow up slower. 478 00:41:06,077 --> 00:41:08,443 l don't even know his cartoons! 479 00:41:08,479 --> 00:41:10,538 Who's the Hair Bear Bunch? 480 00:41:10,581 --> 00:41:15,075 The three bears on an invisible motorcycle! 481 00:41:15,119 --> 00:41:17,451 lt was on when l was little. 482 00:41:17,488 --> 00:41:19,649 That was years ago! 483 00:41:19,690 --> 00:41:22,090 l used to watch it. 484 00:41:23,895 --> 00:41:26,022 How can this kid know about it? 485 00:41:28,065 --> 00:41:31,728 - How old is this Aeneas? - Don't know and don't care. 486 00:41:31,769 --> 00:41:34,067 Well, l do! 487 00:41:35,273 --> 00:41:38,106 lt won't work if he's too old. 488 00:41:38,142 --> 00:41:42,238 Catherine Zeta-Jones is 30 years younger than Michael Douglas. 489 00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:45,340 The art world doesn't count. 490 00:41:45,383 --> 00:41:48,841 Aeneas is an artist. He's a killer drawer! 491 00:41:48,886 --> 00:41:53,823 10 or 15 years difference means he's experienced. 492 00:41:53,858 --> 00:41:57,191 15 years is too much! 493 00:41:57,228 --> 00:42:01,665 When you were coming out of your mother's uterus, 494 00:42:01,699 --> 00:42:06,227 he was already trying to get in someone else's! 495 00:42:06,270 --> 00:42:09,967 - Like l care. - Well, the law does! 496 00:42:10,007 --> 00:42:12,737 Emotions obey no law! 497 00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:19,914 - He's from a different generation. - Like who cares? 498 00:42:19,951 --> 00:42:22,647 He had to get up to change the TV station! 499 00:42:22,687 --> 00:42:27,181 - Why? - There were no remote controls yet! 500 00:42:27,225 --> 00:42:28,954 Shut up! 501 00:43:05,730 --> 00:43:07,527 He's not here! 502 00:43:38,596 --> 00:43:41,292 Hear that? He said you're beautiful. 503 00:43:46,537 --> 00:43:49,734 When he comes, don't say you're my aunt. 504 00:43:52,944 --> 00:43:54,935 Say you're my cousin. 505 00:43:54,979 --> 00:43:58,506 No, say you're my friend. 506 00:44:01,686 --> 00:44:04,814 No, stand over there and scope him out. 507 00:44:04,855 --> 00:44:07,949 Then tell me what you think later. 508 00:44:09,226 --> 00:44:10,693 Get moving. 509 00:44:24,041 --> 00:44:28,705 Andrea and l broke up exactly ten days ago. 510 00:44:28,746 --> 00:44:31,340 As if anyone cared! 511 00:44:40,324 --> 00:44:41,348 Great! 512 00:44:41,392 --> 00:44:43,121 Sun rash. 513 00:44:46,030 --> 00:44:47,497 lt's your fault! 514 00:44:47,531 --> 00:44:51,399 l told you the sun is too hot at this time of day. 515 00:44:51,435 --> 00:44:54,632 - You know what this means? - You can't lay out anymore. 516 00:44:54,672 --> 00:44:57,800 You ruined my vacation! 517 00:45:22,933 --> 00:45:25,094 lt's Meggy! 518 00:45:26,670 --> 00:45:29,503 ls there a porn star convention on the island? 519 00:45:29,540 --> 00:45:31,906 No, l'm going to Shooters. 520 00:45:31,942 --> 00:45:35,105 That's a club. You go there at night. 521 00:45:35,146 --> 00:45:38,138 l am always ready ahead of time. 522 00:45:38,182 --> 00:45:40,742 Aren't you going? 523 00:45:40,785 --> 00:45:43,345 Maybe, l don't know. 524 00:45:47,291 --> 00:45:50,488 - Where are you going now? - Swimming. 525 00:45:50,528 --> 00:45:54,760 - lf you wanna come... - l'm not wearing my suit! 526 00:45:54,799 --> 00:45:57,700 Well, see you. 527 00:45:57,735 --> 00:46:00,397 When will l see you again? 528 00:46:02,540 --> 00:46:04,565 Maybe tonight at Shooters. 529 00:46:04,608 --> 00:46:07,202 Late, though. 530 00:46:07,244 --> 00:46:10,645 Or we'll run into each other, it's a small island. 531 00:46:15,853 --> 00:46:17,616 Later, Potato Head. 532 00:46:45,082 --> 00:46:47,243 l have light eruption! 533 00:46:47,284 --> 00:46:51,084 Now l have to go out at night and sleep during the day. 534 00:46:52,523 --> 00:46:55,720 - Wanna dance? - l quit dancing. 535 00:46:55,759 --> 00:47:00,560 lt should be illegal at a certain age and over a certain waist size! 536 00:47:00,598 --> 00:47:02,623 This music isn't really... 537 00:47:04,168 --> 00:47:07,001 - ls that ecstasy? - Antihistamine. 538 00:47:09,306 --> 00:47:11,501 Are all guys like this? 539 00:47:11,542 --> 00:47:16,104 They're all: ''l'll be there'', then they never show up? 540 00:47:16,147 --> 00:47:20,481 Guys will promise anything. 541 00:47:20,518 --> 00:47:24,215 They'll take you places, take the trash out... 542 00:47:24,255 --> 00:47:28,988 Once they get what they want... see ya! 543 00:47:29,026 --> 00:47:33,053 l'm a loser! l didn't get to enjoy the first part. 544 00:47:39,937 --> 00:47:45,204 Are we sure this Aeneas really exists? 545 00:47:47,711 --> 00:47:50,305 Now l'll never see him! 546 00:47:50,347 --> 00:47:52,406 Let's find out... 547 00:47:52,449 --> 00:47:54,349 Aeneas? 548 00:47:54,385 --> 00:47:56,853 - Meggy's here! - Clam up! 549 00:48:24,982 --> 00:48:26,950 Are you angry? 550 00:48:26,984 --> 00:48:29,578 l thought you were ''way mature''. 551 00:48:31,589 --> 00:48:33,989 You humiliated me in public! 552 00:48:34,024 --> 00:48:37,289 l was just trying to help. 553 00:48:37,328 --> 00:48:39,888 You're the one who needs help! 554 00:48:43,934 --> 00:48:48,030 Your problem is that you do everything backwards. 555 00:48:48,072 --> 00:48:51,906 Dessert before salad. Sex before love. 556 00:48:51,942 --> 00:48:55,878 You're my problem, and you're clueless about yourself! 557 00:48:55,913 --> 00:49:00,077 - And how am l? - You're anal! 558 00:49:00,117 --> 00:49:03,177 l can imagine you and Andrea boinking. 559 00:49:03,220 --> 00:49:07,281 ''You're messing up my hair, you're hurting my back!'' 560 00:49:07,324 --> 00:49:09,588 ''My chiropractor said l can't do that position!'' 561 00:49:09,627 --> 00:49:12,391 l bet you only do the missionary. 562 00:49:12,429 --> 00:49:15,956 - Admit it! - Men like to feel dominant! 563 00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:18,867 Andrea dumped you for that Magliocchetti chick, 564 00:49:18,902 --> 00:49:21,302 who boinks 100 times better than you! 565 00:49:21,338 --> 00:49:25,832 l doubt he does the same things with her. 566 00:49:25,876 --> 00:49:28,504 Like what? 567 00:49:28,545 --> 00:49:30,274 Foreplay? 568 00:49:30,314 --> 00:49:32,111 Did he discover your erogenous zones? 569 00:49:32,149 --> 00:49:34,982 Your G-spot? 570 00:49:42,293 --> 00:49:45,057 lt was something only we did. 571 00:49:45,095 --> 00:49:47,325 Clean up your mess! 572 00:49:48,399 --> 00:49:51,835 - What was it? - Not now. lt's late. 573 00:49:51,869 --> 00:49:55,066 You can sleep when you're old, but l need sleep now. 574 00:49:55,105 --> 00:49:59,371 Duh, you need to sleep! You're way mature for your age! 575 00:50:17,895 --> 00:50:19,829 Fuck off! 576 00:50:51,495 --> 00:50:52,621 Breakfast! 577 00:50:57,101 --> 00:51:00,537 Sorry about what l said last night. 578 00:51:00,571 --> 00:51:05,133 You're right. l do everything backwards. 579 00:51:07,211 --> 00:51:09,509 But l still think you're anal. 580 00:51:13,250 --> 00:51:17,448 - Do you know what l do before sex? - What? 581 00:51:17,488 --> 00:51:20,946 - l fold my clothes. - Shut up! 582 00:51:24,828 --> 00:51:27,729 - God, you're a nutcase. - l know. 583 00:51:27,765 --> 00:51:32,793 l try to lighten up but l just can't. 584 00:51:32,836 --> 00:51:34,827 Change. 585 00:51:34,872 --> 00:51:37,500 l don't know how. 586 00:51:38,809 --> 00:51:41,903 You totally lie to yourself. 587 00:51:41,945 --> 00:51:47,713 You pretend you're on this major diet, but you eat whatever you want. 588 00:51:47,751 --> 00:51:52,279 You're all: ''Chocolate makes you lose weight''. 589 00:51:52,322 --> 00:51:55,155 Half a piece is way less fattening! 590 00:51:55,192 --> 00:51:57,683 You say you're a loser. 591 00:51:57,728 --> 00:51:59,821 This is the best time of your life! 592 00:51:59,863 --> 00:52:03,026 Being 15 sucks! 593 00:52:03,066 --> 00:52:05,432 Wait till you're 30! 594 00:52:07,371 --> 00:52:09,362 Peace? 595 00:52:09,406 --> 00:52:12,466 - l love you, Auntie. - Me too. 596 00:52:14,411 --> 00:52:16,936 l thought about this creep you like. 597 00:52:16,980 --> 00:52:19,073 Give up. 598 00:52:19,116 --> 00:52:21,846 There are two kinds of women. 599 00:52:21,885 --> 00:52:26,652 Ones who get serious with the wrong guy... like me. 600 00:52:26,690 --> 00:52:31,059 And those who never date because they want unattainable guys, like you. 601 00:52:38,902 --> 00:52:40,802 Why is Aeneas unattainable? 602 00:52:40,838 --> 00:52:42,965 You have nothing to talk about. 603 00:52:43,006 --> 00:52:45,998 People should have things in common. 604 00:52:46,043 --> 00:52:48,443 Like l care! 605 00:52:48,479 --> 00:52:50,538 l just like his body! 606 00:52:50,581 --> 00:52:53,141 Maybe he wants more. 607 00:52:53,183 --> 00:52:55,174 You can leave... 608 00:52:55,219 --> 00:52:59,315 You mean he's not attracted to me? 609 00:52:59,356 --> 00:53:03,087 Maybe he needs a connection with you. 610 00:53:03,126 --> 00:53:06,061 A similar cultural background is important. 611 00:53:06,096 --> 00:53:10,624 Andrea and l grew up in the 80's so we liked the same things. 612 00:53:10,667 --> 00:53:14,467 He fell in love with me because l cried watching ''Facts of Life''. 613 00:53:16,540 --> 00:53:19,134 We used to watch the same TV shows. 614 00:53:21,311 --> 00:53:23,836 ''Little House on the Prairie''. 615 00:53:25,682 --> 00:53:28,742 ''Three's Company'', ''Bewitched''. 616 00:53:28,785 --> 00:53:31,345 ''Eight ls Enough''. 617 00:53:31,388 --> 00:53:33,788 ''Fantasy lsland''! 618 00:53:36,426 --> 00:53:39,054 What do you say, l could get my navel pierced! 619 00:53:41,999 --> 00:53:45,628 lt's hard to talk about the 80's. 620 00:53:45,669 --> 00:53:48,638 That was the best decade ever and it's over. 621 00:53:48,672 --> 00:53:51,505 - Give me the cortisone. - Do you itch? 622 00:53:51,542 --> 00:53:54,067 No, just to keep you company. 623 00:53:55,379 --> 00:53:56,812 You know what it reminds me of? 624 00:53:56,847 --> 00:53:59,213 ln school, my friends and l 625 00:53:59,249 --> 00:54:02,343 would practice what to say to guys. 626 00:54:02,386 --> 00:54:06,117 lf you like a guy, you had to use his words. 627 00:54:06,156 --> 00:54:09,125 You had to say what he wanted to hear. 628 00:54:10,093 --> 00:54:12,061 For example? 629 00:54:13,897 --> 00:54:15,762 Talking about old movies was a winner. 630 00:54:15,799 --> 00:54:18,825 - SAY IT IN MY WORDS - ...''Love Story'' was perfect. 631 00:54:21,138 --> 00:54:23,003 Then what? 632 00:54:23,040 --> 00:54:27,033 To talk about politics without being political, you talked about punk music 633 00:54:27,077 --> 00:54:29,841 being a counter-reaction to Thatcher. 634 00:54:29,880 --> 00:54:32,781 A real artist has to have a nemesis. 635 00:54:32,816 --> 00:54:35,478 l don't understand, but it sounds great. 636 00:54:35,519 --> 00:54:37,612 So l'm all: 637 00:54:37,654 --> 00:54:41,522 ''What if all he cares about is physical attraction''? 638 00:54:41,558 --> 00:54:43,685 Who? 639 00:54:43,727 --> 00:54:47,527 You! You are not paying attention! 640 00:54:47,564 --> 00:54:50,431 You only use single syllable words! 641 00:54:50,467 --> 00:54:52,765 Because l'm drawing! 642 00:54:52,803 --> 00:54:55,135 Come over here and try. 643 00:54:57,307 --> 00:55:01,767 lt stimulates your artistic brain and turns off your mouth. 644 00:55:01,812 --> 00:55:03,803 Come on, here's a piece of paper. 645 00:55:03,847 --> 00:55:04,871 Go ahead. 646 00:55:06,717 --> 00:55:09,083 My brain must be in stereo. 647 00:55:09,119 --> 00:55:13,453 l can draw and talk at the same time! 648 00:55:15,058 --> 00:55:19,893 l think it's way important to have similar cultural backgrounds. 649 00:55:19,930 --> 00:55:24,128 Let's talk about movies. l think ''Love Story'' is great. 650 00:55:24,167 --> 00:55:26,635 The book was good too. 651 00:55:26,670 --> 00:55:28,865 Well, l saw the movie! 652 00:55:28,905 --> 00:55:31,601 Maybe they wrote a book afterwards. 653 00:55:31,642 --> 00:55:34,634 Comparing a book to a movie 654 00:55:34,678 --> 00:55:37,511 is like totally absurd! 655 00:55:37,547 --> 00:55:39,276 How about music? 656 00:55:39,316 --> 00:55:42,376 Thatcher was like royally strict. 657 00:55:42,419 --> 00:55:46,856 - She's not a school teacher. - Okay, so l don't know who she is. 658 00:55:46,890 --> 00:55:48,687 But punk music was a counter-reaction. 659 00:55:48,725 --> 00:55:53,059 - A real artist has to... - Have a nemesis. 660 00:55:53,096 --> 00:55:54,620 Everyone says that. 661 00:55:54,665 --> 00:55:56,064 What is this? 662 00:55:56,099 --> 00:55:58,294 You want right-winged extremism so you can 663 00:55:58,335 --> 00:56:01,736 listen to revolutionary music in your bedroom? 664 00:56:03,607 --> 00:56:05,507 Pick another topic. 665 00:56:05,542 --> 00:56:07,567 The 1980's! 666 00:56:07,611 --> 00:56:10,978 - The 80's were horrible! - You don't like anything! 667 00:56:11,014 --> 00:56:13,175 What are we supposed to talk about? 668 00:56:14,184 --> 00:56:17,210 You get one more chance. TV shows. 669 00:56:17,254 --> 00:56:19,950 The ''Love Boat'' rocked! 670 00:56:19,990 --> 00:56:24,552 - And ''Eight ls Enough''. - Girlie shows. 671 00:56:24,594 --> 00:56:27,392 What about ''Facts of Life''? 672 00:56:27,431 --> 00:56:31,128 Could you get any more pathetic? 673 00:56:31,168 --> 00:56:35,002 The best minds of my generation were brainwashed by ''Facts of Life''. 674 00:56:36,440 --> 00:56:39,068 - You feel all right? - l'm fine. 675 00:56:48,018 --> 00:56:49,986 You're getting sunstroke. 676 00:57:08,205 --> 00:57:10,264 l can't go out like this. 677 00:57:10,307 --> 00:57:12,571 Do l look fat here? 678 00:57:12,609 --> 00:57:14,770 No, it makes you look younger! 679 00:57:16,413 --> 00:57:19,109 - So l look like my grandma? - Let's play a game. 680 00:57:19,149 --> 00:57:23,813 l think of a question in my head and find the answer in a book. 681 00:57:23,854 --> 00:57:26,288 - What kind of game is that? - You'll see. 682 00:57:26,323 --> 00:57:28,655 First question. 683 00:57:31,595 --> 00:57:33,324 Answer. 684 00:57:35,532 --> 00:57:38,296 ''A 20-minute orgasm''. Here we are! 685 00:57:38,335 --> 00:57:41,862 - Massage and stimulation... - Are you insinuating something? 686 00:57:43,440 --> 00:57:47,774 - Of course! - ls that all you men think about? 687 00:57:47,811 --> 00:57:51,679 - This is the island of love! - Sex is highly overrated! 688 00:57:51,715 --> 00:57:54,377 Because you've had it. 689 00:57:54,417 --> 00:57:56,180 For me it's just highly rated! 690 00:57:56,219 --> 00:57:59,154 l just got out of a long relationship. 691 00:57:59,189 --> 00:58:01,180 Let's... 692 00:58:01,224 --> 00:58:02,885 Let's just be friends, okay? 693 00:58:04,327 --> 00:58:07,728 Know who l am? Every woman's best friend! 694 00:58:07,764 --> 00:58:12,292 Does a guy become an enemy after he has sex? 695 00:58:12,335 --> 00:58:14,166 Where's the logic? 696 00:58:14,204 --> 00:58:16,263 We can do it and still be friends. 697 00:58:16,306 --> 00:58:18,672 Listen. 698 00:58:18,708 --> 00:58:20,767 You'll make up for it at 50. 699 00:58:20,811 --> 00:58:23,837 When you're friends are old and gray! 700 00:58:23,880 --> 00:58:25,848 You will still be handsome. 701 00:58:25,882 --> 00:58:29,181 God, were you about to boink? 702 00:58:29,219 --> 00:58:32,518 Yeah, maybe in 34 years! 703 00:58:32,556 --> 00:58:37,016 Then you can wait, this is way more important. 704 00:58:37,060 --> 00:58:40,587 Okay, we're like a couple now. 705 00:58:40,630 --> 00:58:42,791 We argued for an hour. 706 00:58:42,833 --> 00:58:47,702 He hates ''The Young Werther'', the book you both love! 707 00:58:47,737 --> 00:58:50,297 Sorry for the interruption. 708 00:58:50,340 --> 00:58:54,003 The storm has passed, let love come shining through! 709 00:58:57,214 --> 00:59:01,082 This kid hates ''Werther'' but at least he read it! 710 00:59:01,117 --> 00:59:06,749 l would tell Andrea the plot then he'd act like he read it. 711 00:59:08,091 --> 00:59:12,357 You may be from the 80's but you don't understand shit! 712 00:59:15,765 --> 00:59:18,928 You men always bail out of promises. 713 00:59:18,969 --> 00:59:20,732 Like what? 714 00:59:20,770 --> 00:59:24,171 You say you'll take the trash out or whatever, then... 715 00:59:24,207 --> 00:59:27,142 Are you all carbon copies? 716 00:59:27,177 --> 00:59:29,077 You all say the same things! 717 00:59:31,548 --> 00:59:34,517 Women are the ones who don't keep promises. 718 00:59:36,853 --> 00:59:38,821 You never diet the first two months. 719 00:59:38,855 --> 00:59:44,122 Then you're allergic to this, that's too fattening... 720 00:59:44,160 --> 00:59:45,889 l'm not like that. 721 00:59:45,929 --> 00:59:48,454 l'm totally straight-up! 722 00:59:48,498 --> 00:59:51,490 Not you, women in general. 723 00:59:51,534 --> 00:59:54,560 My teacher was like that 724 00:59:54,604 --> 00:59:57,732 when l was still in school. 725 00:59:57,774 --> 01:00:00,971 She'd be all: ''Someone is talking''. 726 01:00:01,011 --> 01:00:04,412 Then she'd be all: ''lt's Vittorio Passarelli''! 727 01:00:07,017 --> 01:00:08,917 Who are you thinking about? 728 01:00:12,022 --> 01:00:13,990 Come on, tell me! 729 01:00:19,229 --> 01:00:22,756 There must be 800 calories in this. 730 01:00:22,799 --> 01:00:24,858 l have a royal problem. 731 01:00:24,901 --> 01:00:26,766 Guess who l remind him of? 732 01:00:26,803 --> 01:00:29,533 - Who? - His ex! 733 01:00:29,572 --> 01:00:32,803 - His ex? - Yes, he's still into her. 734 01:00:32,842 --> 01:00:35,333 He got all sad as soon as he mentioned her. 735 01:00:35,378 --> 01:00:39,974 Then you have to find a way to destroy her! 736 01:00:40,016 --> 01:00:43,349 - Groovy, you're on my side! - lt's a matter of principle. 737 01:00:43,386 --> 01:00:47,482 You have to ruin the image of ex-girlfriends early on. 738 01:00:47,524 --> 01:00:50,391 They forget about their faults in time 739 01:00:50,427 --> 01:00:53,453 and no other woman can ever live up to them! 740 01:00:53,496 --> 01:00:56,761 How can l ruin someone l don't even know? 741 01:00:56,800 --> 01:00:59,667 Did he say anything about her? 742 01:00:59,703 --> 01:01:02,001 What was she like? 743 01:01:06,576 --> 01:01:09,477 She was thin but thought she was fat! 744 01:01:09,512 --> 01:01:14,677 Those girls who try clothes on and say: ''l look fat'' 745 01:01:14,718 --> 01:01:17,050 just so someone says they're not. 746 01:01:17,087 --> 01:01:20,454 l detest them! 747 01:01:20,490 --> 01:01:24,824 There's only one way to define girls like that, a bitch! 748 01:01:24,861 --> 01:01:27,421 Just like all ex's! 749 01:01:27,464 --> 01:01:30,865 We'll totally destroy her. l've already figured her out. 750 01:01:30,900 --> 01:01:33,733 Find out what you can. 751 01:01:33,770 --> 01:01:36,261 l'll handle it, l'll take care of her. 752 01:01:39,709 --> 01:01:41,074 Where are you going? 753 01:01:41,111 --> 01:01:44,945 - To sleep. - lt's 9:30, it's early! 754 01:01:44,981 --> 01:01:47,848 Aeneas gets up at 7. 755 01:01:47,884 --> 01:01:49,818 We like enjoying the day together. 756 01:01:50,820 --> 01:01:52,447 Didn't you notice? 757 01:01:52,489 --> 01:01:56,789 - Awesome! New clothes! - No, they're yours! 758 01:01:56,826 --> 01:02:00,626 lt makes you look younger! 759 01:02:07,737 --> 01:02:10,763 l wanna know everything about your past and your ex. 760 01:02:10,807 --> 01:02:13,105 lt will help me know you better. 761 01:02:13,143 --> 01:02:16,840 - What? - lt will help me know you better. 762 01:02:18,848 --> 01:02:20,475 Differences. 763 01:02:20,517 --> 01:02:24,044 l'd lose things and she'd always find them. 764 01:02:24,087 --> 01:02:27,250 l'd run out of money and she has a hidden stash. 765 01:02:27,290 --> 01:02:30,657 l sleep at night and she stays awake. 766 01:02:30,693 --> 01:02:34,561 l have a headache and she shows up with aspirin. 767 01:02:36,699 --> 01:02:39,395 She likes mountains, l like the sea. 768 01:02:39,436 --> 01:02:41,836 She's... and l'm... 769 01:02:41,871 --> 01:02:45,170 She goes... and l go... 770 01:02:45,208 --> 01:02:47,608 You couldn't really agree on anything! 771 01:02:47,644 --> 01:02:49,669 Not really. 772 01:02:49,712 --> 01:02:53,944 At first we cherished our differences. 773 01:02:53,983 --> 01:02:56,577 We thought they would enrich us. 774 01:02:56,619 --> 01:03:01,386 Then she suddenly decided we had to be the same. 775 01:03:01,424 --> 01:03:03,722 l had to be just like her. 776 01:03:03,760 --> 01:03:06,820 You don't know her, being like her is... 777 01:03:08,898 --> 01:03:11,594 l would never dream of changing you! 778 01:03:15,038 --> 01:03:18,906 l've got a lot of ideas and plans. 779 01:03:18,942 --> 01:03:21,638 She'd cut them all down. 780 01:03:21,678 --> 01:03:24,238 l'd tell her about an idea and she'd say: ''No''. 781 01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:26,874 No to everything! 782 01:03:26,916 --> 01:03:29,817 l am the queen of recognizing hip ideas! 783 01:03:29,853 --> 01:03:32,651 All of my CD's are at the top of the charts. 784 01:03:35,325 --> 01:03:37,384 - Hit me. - What? 785 01:03:37,427 --> 01:03:40,624 - Tell me an idea! - Just like that? 786 01:03:40,663 --> 01:03:45,862 - Come on, man! - l don't know, nothing comes to me. 787 01:03:45,902 --> 01:03:47,927 - Come on! - All right. 788 01:03:50,573 --> 01:03:52,734 l write them in here. 789 01:03:52,775 --> 01:03:54,572 You never know. 790 01:03:54,611 --> 01:03:58,012 l might need them someday. 791 01:03:58,047 --> 01:03:59,742 How about this one... 792 01:04:01,951 --> 01:04:04,715 l could open a store... 793 01:04:04,754 --> 01:04:07,222 No, not this one. 794 01:04:09,025 --> 01:04:11,516 This one has already been done. 795 01:04:11,561 --> 01:04:14,029 Really? No way! 796 01:04:14,297 --> 01:04:16,458 Listen to this one. 797 01:04:16,499 --> 01:04:20,026 This sounds stupid. 798 01:04:20,069 --> 01:04:23,402 l'm a guy who... 799 01:04:23,439 --> 01:04:26,033 l think you're a total genius. 800 01:04:39,756 --> 01:04:43,089 Oh my God, he sells ideas! 801 01:04:43,126 --> 01:04:45,492 Who doesn't? 802 01:04:45,528 --> 01:04:47,655 Andrea tried to, too. 803 01:04:47,697 --> 01:04:50,598 He wasn't good at it because he wasn't self-confident. 804 01:04:50,633 --> 01:04:51,861 l kept telling him. 805 01:04:56,372 --> 01:04:58,670 How cute, they're making love! 806 01:04:58,708 --> 01:05:02,007 l think l like this Aeneas! 807 01:05:02,045 --> 01:05:03,774 He sounds perfect for me. 808 01:05:03,813 --> 01:05:07,874 - Friends don't steal boyfriends! - l know! 809 01:05:07,917 --> 01:05:09,908 But he sounds really cool. 810 01:05:09,953 --> 01:05:12,217 And he went out with a bitch. 811 01:05:12,255 --> 01:05:14,223 lt figures! 812 01:05:14,257 --> 01:05:17,249 Two nice people never go out. 813 01:05:17,293 --> 01:05:20,456 lt's always one good and one bad person. 814 01:05:20,496 --> 01:05:23,431 That's why l went out with Andrea. 815 01:05:23,466 --> 01:05:25,900 What else did he say? 816 01:05:25,935 --> 01:05:29,302 She wanted to change him into her. 817 01:05:29,339 --> 01:05:33,105 No, the classic mistake! 818 01:05:33,142 --> 01:05:35,440 You can't change people. 819 01:05:35,478 --> 01:05:36,672 But he stayed himself. 820 01:05:36,713 --> 01:05:40,171 - And the bitch dumped him. - Good for him. 821 01:05:40,216 --> 01:05:44,243 - There's a real man. - No, l doubt he beats women. 822 01:05:44,287 --> 01:05:45,948 He's just the cheating type. 823 01:05:45,989 --> 01:05:49,618 How awful! He cheated on her! 824 01:05:53,630 --> 01:05:55,393 They've been at it for 20 minutes! 825 01:05:55,431 --> 01:05:57,763 - Did he cheat on her? - They can, why can't l? 826 01:05:57,800 --> 01:05:59,927 Did he cheat on her or not? 827 01:05:59,969 --> 01:06:02,130 l don't know, l didn't ask. 828 01:06:02,171 --> 01:06:05,572 You're still here? Go find out! 829 01:06:07,377 --> 01:06:09,311 Knock it off! 830 01:06:14,284 --> 01:06:18,414 l can't believe you sleep all day and l sleep at night. 831 01:06:18,454 --> 01:06:20,718 You should have come with someone your own age! 832 01:06:21,824 --> 01:06:23,451 Get moving! 833 01:07:04,767 --> 01:07:07,292 - l found out. - He cheated? 834 01:07:07,337 --> 01:07:09,100 Affirmative. 835 01:07:13,242 --> 01:07:16,575 l think cheating is morally wrong. People shouldn't cheat... 836 01:07:16,612 --> 01:07:20,946 but now that we've analyzed the entire situation, 837 01:07:20,983 --> 01:07:24,714 l'd say the bitch deserved it. 838 01:07:26,389 --> 01:07:28,220 Poor girl! 839 01:07:31,494 --> 01:07:33,655 - You wanna hear? - Yes! 840 01:07:33,696 --> 01:07:36,563 He did it with an ex-ex. 841 01:07:36,599 --> 01:07:41,059 - Two girlfriends ago. - Then she's a double bitch! 842 01:07:41,104 --> 01:07:45,632 They couldn't see each other because bitch number 1 wouldn't let them. 843 01:07:45,675 --> 01:07:47,540 Of course! 844 01:07:47,577 --> 01:07:51,343 lt's easy to screw an ex because you've already done it! 845 01:07:51,381 --> 01:07:53,611 Can l continue? 846 01:07:53,649 --> 01:07:56,812 He sees this ex-ex again 847 01:07:56,853 --> 01:07:59,845 and old memories resurface in him. 848 01:07:59,889 --> 01:08:03,052 - And they had sex. - No! Way worse! 849 01:08:03,092 --> 01:08:04,855 What could be worse? 850 01:08:04,894 --> 01:08:08,591 They spent the whole night wrapped in each other's arms 851 01:08:08,631 --> 01:08:11,759 crying and solving unresolved things. 852 01:08:11,801 --> 01:08:15,134 The next morning they were healed. 853 01:08:15,171 --> 01:08:17,662 Healed by love! 854 01:08:22,979 --> 01:08:24,776 lT COULD HAVE HAPPENED TO ME 855 01:08:24,814 --> 01:08:27,476 Disgusting! 856 01:08:27,517 --> 01:08:29,508 IF WE GOT BACK TOGETHER, I WOULD: 857 01:08:33,389 --> 01:08:37,416 That's it! l'm getting rid of this. 858 01:08:37,460 --> 01:08:40,020 Voice mail is the most useless thing in the world! 859 01:08:40,062 --> 01:08:44,089 Andrea is with that sex bomb and hasn't left any messages! 860 01:08:44,133 --> 01:08:46,863 No more wrinkle-free cream or medicines! 861 01:08:46,903 --> 01:08:50,304 You can have all my hidden chocolate! 862 01:08:50,339 --> 01:08:51,567 Here. 863 01:08:51,607 --> 01:08:55,236 Diets are against nature. 864 01:08:55,278 --> 01:08:57,405 From now on l'm eating and drinking! 865 01:08:57,447 --> 01:09:02,282 lt isn't food that makes you fat, it's guilt! 866 01:09:02,318 --> 01:09:06,220 l'm tired of hearing ''it makes you look younger''! 867 01:09:06,255 --> 01:09:09,952 - You're going nuts. - No, l'm normal now. 868 01:09:09,992 --> 01:09:12,620 This cake made me realize it. 869 01:09:12,662 --> 01:09:15,324 l like it better than Andrea's! 870 01:09:15,364 --> 01:09:20,802 Now go tell Aeneas he wasted years on the wrong person. 871 01:09:20,837 --> 01:09:22,998 lt's time to start over and live! 872 01:09:23,039 --> 01:09:26,031 - l'm gonna do it. - Go. 873 01:09:26,075 --> 01:09:28,635 - l'm taking your chocolate. - Okay. 874 01:09:30,112 --> 01:09:32,808 - l'm going to eat it. - Sure. 875 01:09:32,849 --> 01:09:34,476 lt makes you lose weight. 876 01:09:34,517 --> 01:09:37,452 But half a piece is even less fattening. 877 01:09:47,196 --> 01:09:50,495 Your relationship totally sucked. 878 01:09:50,533 --> 01:09:53,696 She was all anal and tried to change you. 879 01:09:53,736 --> 01:09:57,672 She was clueless about your creativity and hated your friends. 880 01:09:57,707 --> 01:10:00,608 She was jealous about your ex's. 881 01:10:00,643 --> 01:10:02,907 l hope l'm not going overboard, 882 01:10:02,945 --> 01:10:08,178 but you wasted years on someone who wasn't all that. 883 01:10:10,853 --> 01:10:13,515 You are such a honey! 884 01:10:18,694 --> 01:10:20,924 lsn't all that chocolate... 885 01:10:20,963 --> 01:10:22,863 Fattening? 886 01:10:22,899 --> 01:10:25,026 No. Because l don't feel guilty. 887 01:10:28,037 --> 01:10:30,528 Aeneas was all: ''What are we doing tonight?'' 888 01:10:30,573 --> 01:10:35,101 l'm no longer a potato head, l'm a human girl! 889 01:10:35,144 --> 01:10:38,739 - So? - What's going to happen? 890 01:10:38,781 --> 01:10:42,239 Whatever happens, happens. 891 01:10:42,285 --> 01:10:44,845 Don't you get it, it's a royal mess! 892 01:10:44,887 --> 01:10:48,186 l'll look like a total loser with the guy l'm in love with! 893 01:10:48,224 --> 01:10:50,692 Oh my God, l'm in love! 894 01:10:50,726 --> 01:10:53,524 We should have done it before. 895 01:10:53,563 --> 01:10:55,588 You're coming too! 896 01:10:55,631 --> 01:10:57,929 Are you crazy? 897 01:10:57,967 --> 01:11:01,994 lt's your responsibility, l'm a minor! 898 01:11:02,038 --> 01:11:05,838 You want to rebel and expect me to give you permission? 899 01:11:05,875 --> 01:11:07,900 l've quit mothering people. 900 01:11:07,944 --> 01:11:10,504 Look what happened with Andrea! 901 01:11:10,546 --> 01:11:13,379 Now he's screwing the sex bomb! 902 01:11:13,416 --> 01:11:16,510 lf you're ready, do it. 903 01:11:16,552 --> 01:11:18,349 This is your problem. 904 01:11:18,387 --> 01:11:20,651 So like, my heart will guide me? 905 01:11:20,690 --> 01:11:25,059 Something will guide you but it won't be your heart. 906 01:11:25,094 --> 01:11:28,393 - A different organ? - Yes. 907 01:11:28,431 --> 01:11:31,298 - A sex organ? - Guess so. 908 01:11:36,038 --> 01:11:38,370 What's our song? 909 01:13:09,331 --> 01:13:10,696 You wanna come up? 910 01:13:15,538 --> 01:13:17,472 You didn't bring anything to drink! 911 01:13:40,596 --> 01:13:46,262 - What do you want? - An orgasm. lf they have it. 912 01:13:56,679 --> 01:13:59,477 - What do you wanna do? - Let's mosh. 913 01:14:31,480 --> 01:14:35,507 l'm not uncomfortable talking about sex with you. 914 01:14:35,551 --> 01:14:38,281 What do you want to talk about? 915 01:14:38,320 --> 01:14:41,721 - Duration. - All right, duration. 916 01:14:41,757 --> 01:14:44,988 l bet the guys you've had all had that problem. 917 01:14:45,027 --> 01:14:47,757 - Yes. - See? 918 01:14:47,797 --> 01:14:49,264 lt's not their fault. 919 01:14:49,298 --> 01:14:51,459 lt was because they were inexperienced. 920 01:14:51,500 --> 01:14:56,528 Sex is being aware, experimenting and exploring. 921 01:14:56,572 --> 01:15:00,338 l finally found my own method. 922 01:15:00,376 --> 01:15:02,435 What? 923 01:15:02,478 --> 01:15:04,446 Breathe in your chakra? 924 01:15:04,480 --> 01:15:07,449 - What? - lt's tantric sex. 925 01:15:07,483 --> 01:15:10,043 - You like tantric sex? - Of course! 926 01:15:10,085 --> 01:15:11,518 l don't. 927 01:15:11,554 --> 01:15:14,955 lt's like studying extinct languages, Latin or Greek. 928 01:15:14,990 --> 01:15:18,289 l worked out my own method. 929 01:15:18,327 --> 01:15:20,761 When the situation... 930 01:15:20,796 --> 01:15:24,357 gets critical, 931 01:15:24,400 --> 01:15:27,028 l focus on Richie Cunningham's mom. 932 01:15:27,069 --> 01:15:28,764 Then the system shuts down. 933 01:15:28,804 --> 01:15:33,036 When the situation in my other half cools down, 934 01:15:33,075 --> 01:15:35,475 l change channels in my head again. 935 01:15:35,511 --> 01:15:37,672 To see what's there. There's always a game show. 936 01:15:37,713 --> 01:15:39,510 And then ready, set, go! 937 01:15:39,548 --> 01:15:41,573 l don't feel well. 938 01:15:42,852 --> 01:15:44,717 l'm going back to my tent. 939 01:15:47,089 --> 01:15:48,283 Goodnight. 940 01:15:50,726 --> 01:15:52,125 Goodnight? 941 01:15:52,161 --> 01:15:54,925 What's this? 942 01:15:57,733 --> 01:16:00,065 So Werther... 943 01:16:00,102 --> 01:16:03,594 doesn't kill himself because of love, 944 01:16:03,639 --> 01:16:05,607 but because of lack of love. 945 01:16:05,641 --> 01:16:09,168 lt even says it in the preface! 946 01:16:09,211 --> 01:16:12,647 Anyway, it has a bad ending! 947 01:16:12,681 --> 01:16:15,912 At least he found love. 948 01:16:15,951 --> 01:16:20,081 There are more important things than books. 949 01:16:23,225 --> 01:16:26,251 Help, l can't hold back! 950 01:16:26,295 --> 01:16:28,729 Something is taking control of me! 951 01:16:28,764 --> 01:16:30,789 l have to dance! 952 01:17:02,264 --> 01:17:06,530 - All the photocopies... - What photocopies? 953 01:17:51,113 --> 01:17:54,241 Oh my God, what's happening to me? 954 01:17:54,283 --> 01:17:59,050 lf l can kiss you, then l'm capable of anything! 955 01:17:59,088 --> 01:18:00,578 Thanks a lot! 956 01:18:13,802 --> 01:18:15,702 Here. 957 01:18:23,479 --> 01:18:25,845 Goodnight. 958 01:19:13,862 --> 01:19:15,454 l'm in love with you. 959 01:19:39,288 --> 01:19:41,950 Are we going to have sex now? 960 01:20:28,670 --> 01:20:32,003 Oh my God, Aeneas is dead! 961 01:20:34,943 --> 01:20:37,104 Slow down, you're hurting me! 962 01:20:37,146 --> 01:20:38,443 Stop it! 963 01:20:41,850 --> 01:20:43,613 He's in there. 964 01:20:43,652 --> 01:20:46,212 You look, l'll freak out. 965 01:20:54,796 --> 01:20:56,423 What is it? 966 01:20:56,465 --> 01:21:00,060 - Tell me you didn't do it! - You said you wouldn't care. 967 01:21:00,102 --> 01:21:03,833 - Tell me you didn't do it! - No, we just kissed! 968 01:21:03,872 --> 01:21:07,672 - Get her out of here. - No, let go of me! 969 01:21:07,709 --> 01:21:10,439 Will you chill? 970 01:21:41,677 --> 01:21:43,406 Oh, fuck off! 971 01:21:43,445 --> 01:21:45,606 l get the point! 972 01:22:12,708 --> 01:22:14,767 ls he okay, is he dead? 973 01:22:14,810 --> 01:22:18,405 No, he's better off than both of us. 974 01:22:18,447 --> 01:22:23,908 - He's cute, isn't he? - He's all right. 975 01:22:25,687 --> 01:22:29,623 Sometimes people aren't what they seem. 976 01:22:29,658 --> 01:22:31,888 Not today! 977 01:22:41,770 --> 01:22:47,174 ls it possible that all your life you think you're a certain way, 978 01:22:47,209 --> 01:22:51,771 then suddenly you find out people think you're something else? 979 01:22:53,181 --> 01:22:55,081 What are you really like? 980 01:22:55,117 --> 01:23:00,111 What you feel inside or how other people see you? 981 01:23:00,155 --> 01:23:03,386 How other people see you. 982 01:23:03,425 --> 01:23:05,893 The majority always rules. 983 01:23:14,336 --> 01:23:16,099 Wish me happy birthday. 984 01:23:18,140 --> 01:23:19,903 l'm 15 today! 985 01:23:20,942 --> 01:23:23,137 Do you want a cake? 986 01:23:23,178 --> 01:23:26,045 Chocolate, ginger and cinnamon okay? 987 01:23:29,718 --> 01:23:31,879 What's wrong? 988 01:23:31,920 --> 01:23:35,549 Being 15 trips me out. 989 01:23:36,858 --> 01:23:41,090 l'm like halfway to being you! 990 01:23:50,539 --> 01:23:52,700 Why aren't you talking? 991 01:23:52,741 --> 01:23:56,074 Are you embarrassed about passing out? 992 01:23:56,111 --> 01:23:57,601 Yeah, right. 993 01:23:57,646 --> 01:24:01,548 - Nothing would have happened. - We kissed. 994 01:24:01,583 --> 01:24:03,574 - We did? - Yes. 995 01:24:03,618 --> 01:24:07,213 - lt doesn't mean anything. - lt does so! 996 01:24:07,255 --> 01:24:09,052 Make a decision. 997 01:24:09,091 --> 01:24:11,025 Yes or no! 998 01:24:13,428 --> 01:24:15,794 You won't decide or you decided no? 999 01:24:15,831 --> 01:24:17,594 l decided no. 1000 01:24:17,632 --> 01:24:21,068 - Why not? - Because l said so. 1001 01:24:21,103 --> 01:24:24,038 You're still thinking about your ex! 1002 01:24:27,175 --> 01:24:29,143 But we totally ruined her! 1003 01:24:30,812 --> 01:24:32,939 l'm totally wasting time with you. 1004 01:24:32,981 --> 01:24:34,744 You're probably anal too! 1005 01:24:34,783 --> 01:24:37,946 l bet you fold your clothes before you have sex! 1006 01:24:38,987 --> 01:24:41,046 This was a present for you! 1007 01:25:27,669 --> 01:25:30,103 Ginger and cinnamon. 1008 01:25:33,909 --> 01:25:36,844 This freedom thing was a misconception. 1009 01:25:36,878 --> 01:25:41,281 When you claimed l was holding back your freedom l was actually... 1010 01:25:42,918 --> 01:25:45,216 l was doing it for your own good! 1011 01:25:45,253 --> 01:25:47,778 lf you get this message, call me. 1012 01:25:47,823 --> 01:25:50,383 l'm in los, Cyclades. Greece. 1013 01:25:50,425 --> 01:25:53,019 This crazy teenager island. 1014 01:25:53,061 --> 01:25:54,551 Write this number. 1015 01:25:58,467 --> 01:26:01,834 Hotel Panorama. You can call collect. 1016 01:26:03,071 --> 01:26:07,132 Are you not answering because you're screwing Silvia? 1017 01:26:11,646 --> 01:26:14,979 He changed his mind from one day to the next! 1018 01:26:15,016 --> 01:26:17,576 l'm sure he has his reasons. 1019 01:26:17,619 --> 01:26:20,053 Hopefully you'll never find out why. 1020 01:26:20,088 --> 01:26:22,386 He's probably already left the island. 1021 01:26:22,424 --> 01:26:24,392 l won't ever know why, he's a coward. 1022 01:26:24,426 --> 01:26:27,122 The bitch doesn't know he cheated. 1023 01:26:27,162 --> 01:26:30,256 - Stop calling her a bitch. - Why? 1024 01:26:30,298 --> 01:26:33,233 Because l said so. 1025 01:26:33,268 --> 01:26:36,135 Oh my God, it's him! 1026 01:26:36,171 --> 01:26:39,538 - He's gonna see how old l am! - Just eat your candles! 1027 01:26:42,010 --> 01:26:44,240 Happy Birthday! 1028 01:26:44,279 --> 01:26:46,611 Well? 1029 01:26:48,783 --> 01:26:52,116 You look cool in the shirt l got you! 1030 01:26:55,690 --> 01:26:57,715 l'm Pippo. 1031 01:27:00,629 --> 01:27:03,120 Stefania, this is Aeneas. 1032 01:27:03,164 --> 01:27:05,257 Nice fucking name you picked out! 1033 01:27:16,611 --> 01:27:19,375 So, how did you know about my birthday party? 1034 01:27:19,414 --> 01:27:21,075 The cake. 1035 01:27:21,116 --> 01:27:23,880 - Do you want a piece? - No. 1036 01:27:23,919 --> 01:27:26,479 lt's good, there's a secret ingredient. 1037 01:27:26,521 --> 01:27:28,352 There are two. Ginger and cinnamon. 1038 01:27:30,725 --> 01:27:34,456 - Have you already tried it? - l made it. 1039 01:27:37,432 --> 01:27:39,161 He made it. 1040 01:27:42,704 --> 01:27:45,537 - THE ISLAND OF HYSTERICAL FEMALES - l'm gonna kill you! 1041 01:28:30,518 --> 01:28:34,045 l'm such a loser! Couldn't you be someone else's ex? 1042 01:28:35,190 --> 01:28:38,682 Get over it! We'll find someone else. 1043 01:28:39,361 --> 01:28:42,888 You're clueless! I care who it is! 1044 01:28:45,467 --> 01:28:47,731 And you gave me too much freedom. 1045 01:28:47,769 --> 01:28:50,533 lf you wanna be my aunt, act like it! 1046 01:28:56,845 --> 01:29:00,906 You know that nothing happened between Meggy and me. 1047 01:29:00,949 --> 01:29:05,045 She put me on a pedestal, poor thing. 1048 01:29:05,086 --> 01:29:07,611 She sees me as... 1049 01:29:07,656 --> 01:29:09,920 - This... - This what? 1050 01:29:11,059 --> 01:29:12,959 Give it up! 1051 01:29:15,163 --> 01:29:17,961 She kissed me, I didn't kiss her. 1052 01:29:17,999 --> 01:29:22,629 You never do anything, do you? 1053 01:29:22,671 --> 01:29:24,536 You got dumped and you got kissed! 1054 01:29:24,572 --> 01:29:27,006 - By an adolescent! - So? 1055 01:29:27,042 --> 01:29:28,475 l'm an adolescent. 1056 01:29:28,510 --> 01:29:30,341 Guys don't count. 1057 01:29:32,747 --> 01:29:36,148 We've got a big problem, so what do we do? 1058 01:29:36,184 --> 01:29:37,549 What do you do? 1059 01:29:37,585 --> 01:29:39,576 You're the creative one. 1060 01:29:39,621 --> 01:29:42,784 You'll find a unique way out of this. 1061 01:29:44,192 --> 01:29:45,784 Any suggestions? 1062 01:29:48,596 --> 01:29:51,463 Take that shirt off, you look ridiculous. 1063 01:29:52,667 --> 01:29:55,329 - Are you back together? - Please! 1064 01:29:55,370 --> 01:30:00,467 lt would be way wrong if you got back together with him. 1065 01:30:00,508 --> 01:30:02,533 We all stick together now. 1066 01:30:02,577 --> 01:30:06,377 We're sleeping and going out together. I want a strawberry smoothie! 1067 01:30:54,729 --> 01:30:58,426 I couldn't see any shooting stars from over there. 1068 01:31:21,055 --> 01:31:23,319 lt's cold, put this on. 1069 01:31:31,666 --> 01:31:33,896 Can we talk about our relationship? 1070 01:31:34,936 --> 01:31:36,460 What relationship? 1071 01:31:41,609 --> 01:31:43,873 Look at all the stars. 1072 01:31:44,946 --> 01:31:47,642 They're millions of light years away. 1073 01:31:47,682 --> 01:31:51,311 We sure are insignificant in this universe. 1074 01:31:52,353 --> 01:31:54,184 Speak for yourself. 1075 01:31:54,222 --> 01:31:56,087 Excuse me! 1076 01:32:13,775 --> 01:32:16,403 They're cute, aren't they? l'm happy for her. 1077 01:32:16,444 --> 01:32:20,141 She's seems to be doing good. 1078 01:32:20,181 --> 01:32:22,843 Quiet! l've had enough of you! 1079 01:32:22,884 --> 01:32:26,047 She's fine one day and a mess the next! 1080 01:32:26,087 --> 01:32:29,955 She's 15. So what if she has a bad day? 1081 01:32:29,991 --> 01:32:33,518 Stop it, we're all getting along now. 1082 01:32:33,561 --> 01:32:37,088 Who? What kind of tour group are we? 1083 01:32:37,131 --> 01:32:39,998 We've got a walking time bomb, every girl's best friend, 1084 01:32:40,034 --> 01:32:42,366 and let's not even mention you and me! 1085 01:32:42,403 --> 01:32:44,394 - I feel sick. - What's wrong? 1086 01:32:44,439 --> 01:32:47,897 - I just heard myself speak. - So? 1087 01:32:47,942 --> 01:32:50,376 l'm boring! 1088 01:32:50,411 --> 01:32:52,140 l'm boring! 1089 01:32:52,180 --> 01:32:54,205 I even bore myself! 1090 01:32:54,249 --> 01:32:56,479 - She's weird. - Yeah. 1091 01:32:56,517 --> 01:32:58,041 She's always been. 1092 01:32:58,086 --> 01:33:00,281 Why are you so melodramatic? 1093 01:33:00,321 --> 01:33:04,815 I analyzed my own self and defined myself ''the bitch''! 1094 01:33:04,859 --> 01:33:07,089 Wouldn't that upset you? 1095 01:33:07,128 --> 01:33:10,620 From the outside our relationship is a mess! 1096 01:33:10,665 --> 01:33:13,156 You wanted to change me and I wanted to change you. 1097 01:33:13,201 --> 01:33:18,229 You never know what to say and l'm always judging everyone! 1098 01:33:18,273 --> 01:33:21,106 That's why people like you. 1099 01:33:21,142 --> 01:33:23,042 - Because you're so... - What? 1100 01:33:23,077 --> 01:33:24,237 Say it! A... 1101 01:33:24,279 --> 01:33:26,907 I wasn't going to say ''bitch''! 1102 01:33:26,948 --> 01:33:29,746 No one likes me! 1103 01:33:29,784 --> 01:33:33,276 And now I don't even like myself. 1104 01:33:33,321 --> 01:33:35,016 I do everything wrong! 1105 01:33:35,056 --> 01:33:37,422 Always dieting, I never lose weight. 1106 01:33:37,458 --> 01:33:41,087 - Now I quit dieting and... - You've gained weight. 1107 01:33:41,129 --> 01:33:42,824 - l've lost weight! - That's good! 1108 01:33:42,864 --> 01:33:44,195 No, it isn't! 1109 01:33:44,232 --> 01:33:48,999 lt means l've done everything wrong. I hide and eat, I was lying to myself. 1110 01:33:55,710 --> 01:34:01,376 I know you, you're angry at me because of that night. 1111 01:34:01,416 --> 01:34:04,977 - What night? - That night with you-know-who. 1112 01:34:05,019 --> 01:34:07,419 - Who? - Silvia. 1113 01:34:07,455 --> 01:34:10,151 Can we talk about it? 1114 01:34:11,192 --> 01:34:12,887 Sure, let's talk about it. 1115 01:34:12,927 --> 01:34:16,863 Let's hold each other all night and it will be fine tomorrow. 1116 01:34:16,898 --> 01:34:19,958 Go do that shit with your sex bomb! 1117 01:34:35,049 --> 01:34:38,246 At least give me credit for trying. 1118 01:34:38,286 --> 01:34:40,379 l'm trying to be honest. 1119 01:34:40,421 --> 01:34:45,154 You've told me a sack of lies and now you want to be honest? 1120 01:34:45,193 --> 01:34:47,320 What do I care now? 1121 01:34:50,465 --> 01:34:53,457 But I do have one question. 1122 01:34:54,502 --> 01:34:57,027 - Promise you'll tell the truth. - I promise. 1123 01:34:57,071 --> 01:34:59,335 Ask me. 1124 01:35:03,945 --> 01:35:06,778 Was Silvia better than me in bed? 1125 01:35:13,121 --> 01:35:16,488 She's just more sex-oriented. 1126 01:35:16,524 --> 01:35:20,085 - She's got natural abilities. - So she was better than me? 1127 01:35:20,128 --> 01:35:24,224 - Yes, because she really likes it... - Why did you tell me? 1128 01:35:27,168 --> 01:35:29,329 But I like it with you much better! 1129 01:35:29,370 --> 01:35:33,136 With her l'm always worried about my performance because... 1130 01:35:36,944 --> 01:35:39,913 - Did I hurt you? - A little. 1131 01:35:39,947 --> 01:35:42,177 Good. 1132 01:35:43,251 --> 01:35:46,186 - Can I do my thing? - No, not that. 1133 01:35:46,220 --> 01:35:49,018 You're saying that because l'm sad. 1134 01:35:49,057 --> 01:35:51,890 No, l'm serious. I want to. 1135 01:35:51,926 --> 01:35:54,292 Well, I don't. 1136 01:35:54,328 --> 01:35:56,319 Bitch. 1137 01:36:44,745 --> 01:36:49,114 So like I didn't get deflowered but it's still cool. 1138 01:36:49,150 --> 01:36:54,178 When I get back to school everyone will be all: ''I did it''. 1139 01:36:54,222 --> 01:36:56,713 Their stories will be way identical. 1140 01:36:56,757 --> 01:37:00,818 But my story is like totally unique. 1141 01:37:03,865 --> 01:37:05,457 lt doesn't matter. 1142 01:37:16,644 --> 01:37:20,273 I have a question and I want an honest answer. 1143 01:37:20,314 --> 01:37:23,579 What is this, honesty night? 1144 01:37:23,618 --> 01:37:29,250 lf you hadn't fallen asleep that night, would you have made love to me? 1145 01:37:36,164 --> 01:37:38,428 Just chill, I wouldn't have done it! 1146 01:37:40,601 --> 01:37:43,832 Your first time can't be with someone you like. 1147 01:39:00,214 --> 01:39:04,514 I was totally sure you'd get back together with him. 1148 01:39:04,552 --> 01:39:07,988 - Oh, please. - But you didn't do it. 1149 01:39:09,457 --> 01:39:12,187 l'll give you credit for that. 1150 01:39:12,226 --> 01:39:15,354 You proved you're not a wimp. 1151 01:39:15,396 --> 01:39:19,856 lt was obvious he was waiting for you to go: ''Okay''. 1152 01:39:19,900 --> 01:39:23,028 - You held out! - See? 1153 01:39:44,792 --> 01:39:46,987 You taught me that a woman 1154 01:39:47,028 --> 01:39:51,727 doesn't have to put her ideals aside for the man of her life! 1155 01:39:51,766 --> 01:39:53,563 Exactly. 1156 01:39:53,601 --> 01:39:56,195 ldeals are way important. 1157 01:39:58,706 --> 01:40:01,539 There are exceptions, you know. 1158 01:40:11,285 --> 01:40:13,480 I want off! 1159 01:40:13,521 --> 01:40:17,321 I have to get off, it's important! 1160 01:40:17,358 --> 01:40:19,724 Captain! 1161 01:41:31,599 --> 01:41:34,898 - No, it doesn't count! - Why doesn't it count? 1162 01:41:34,935 --> 01:41:37,403 Because I said so. 1163 01:41:37,438 --> 01:41:39,633 l'm doing it for me, not for you. 1164 01:41:49,950 --> 01:41:52,009 With me, you can... 1165 01:41:52,052 --> 01:41:54,350 ..smoke your pipe when you want. 1166 01:41:54,388 --> 01:41:58,757 Because I like you much more... 1167 01:41:58,793 --> 01:42:04,493 ..so romantic! 1168 01:42:04,532 --> 01:42:08,434 Blue smoke! 1169 01:42:08,469 --> 01:42:12,200 Oh, a cloud inside you. 1170 01:42:12,239 --> 01:42:16,232 And a man who smells like smoke... 1171 01:42:16,277 --> 01:42:20,509 ..is a real man, oh yes! 1172 01:42:20,548 --> 01:42:24,951 I will love you, as long as you want! 1173 01:42:24,985 --> 01:42:28,716 Because that is what you are! 1174 01:42:32,226 --> 01:42:34,956 - A man is a man. - When he smells like smoke. 1175 01:42:36,297 --> 01:42:38,959 - A man is a man. - When he smells like smoke... 1176 01:42:40,768 --> 01:42:44,226 A kiss is ten times better from you! 1177 01:43:55,543 --> 01:43:57,841 - Wait. - What? 1178 01:43:57,878 --> 01:43:59,470 - I have to fold my clothes. - Okay. 1179 01:43:59,513 --> 01:44:02,505 No! You have to say no sometimes! 1180 01:44:02,550 --> 01:44:04,279 Whatever. 1181 01:44:07,087 --> 01:44:12,252 lf two obsessive people are together, at least they don't hurt anyone else. 1182 01:44:12,293 --> 01:44:15,626 No, that's the typical SandM relationship. 1183 01:44:15,663 --> 01:44:17,927 As if you knew! You're a virgin! 1184 01:44:17,965 --> 01:44:22,493 - So are you! - That's normal for my age. 1185 01:44:29,777 --> 01:44:34,305 - So you and I are just friends? - No, we will never be friends! 80555

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