All language subtitles for Harley Quinn - 02x04 - Thawing Hearts.ANTAGONiST+ION10+METCON+DCU.WEBRip-NTb.English.HI.C.orig.Addic7ed.com

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:03,588 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 2 00:00:03,590 --> 00:00:06,740 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 3 00:00:38,490 --> 00:00:39,718 - Ta-da! - Oh. 4 00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:40,858 What is that? 5 00:00:40,860 --> 00:00:42,788 It's a vagina. 6 00:00:42,790 --> 00:00:47,147 Oh! A human vagina. Oh, I see it now! 7 00:00:47,149 --> 00:00:49,769 Everyone always draws dicks. That's sexist. 8 00:00:49,770 --> 00:00:51,768 I'm tryna to flip the script, bitches. 9 00:00:51,770 --> 00:00:54,580 So beautiful. It reminds me of my mother. 10 00:00:54,582 --> 00:00:56,169 Listen, Georgia O'Keeffe, 11 00:00:56,170 --> 00:00:58,958 if you hadn't made it so detailed, we'd still have some fuel left 12 00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:00,838 in that incredibly powerful gun. 13 00:01:00,840 --> 00:01:02,608 I will not compromise for my art. 14 00:01:02,610 --> 00:01:04,808 Okay, everyone into the ice vagina. 15 00:01:04,810 --> 00:01:07,678 Let's go kill Mr. Freeze. 16 00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:11,618 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 17 00:01:11,620 --> 00:01:13,521 I've been dreaming about getting revenge 18 00:01:13,523 --> 00:01:15,218 on this freezer-burned dickhead 19 00:01:15,220 --> 00:01:17,888 ever since he froze me in a block of ice for months! 20 00:01:17,890 --> 00:01:20,328 I'm thinkin' classic "stick an apple in his mouth 21 00:01:20,330 --> 00:01:22,398 and roast him like the pig he is". 22 00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:23,951 - [CELL PHONES CHIMES] - Whoa, oh-oh! 23 00:01:23,953 --> 00:01:26,568 - Take a gander at your cellular telephone. - What? 24 00:01:26,570 --> 00:01:29,308 Oh, my God! He finally did it 25 00:01:29,310 --> 00:01:31,008 and she finally said yes! 26 00:01:31,010 --> 00:01:32,279 - Huzzah! - Third time's a charm. 27 00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:33,359 Eh, he could do better. 28 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,548 Oh, I love weddings! Me and Ivy have so much fun at weddings. 29 00:01:36,550 --> 00:01:38,478 We'll get so shit-faced, we puke, 30 00:01:38,480 --> 00:01:40,179 make fun of all the dumb couples, 31 00:01:40,180 --> 00:01:41,879 make the DJ play "Since U Been Gone" 32 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,259 until a dad tries to fight us. 33 00:01:43,260 --> 00:01:44,918 - [GOON A] What do you think you're doing? - [GOON B] Stop right there! 34 00:01:44,920 --> 00:01:46,789 - [GOON C] Get out of here! - Spread out. 35 00:01:46,790 --> 00:01:48,009 - [GRUNTS] - I got news for ya, 36 00:01:48,010 --> 00:01:50,180 this is Ivy's wedding and she's the dumb couple. 37 00:01:50,182 --> 00:01:51,428 You need to find a date. 38 00:01:51,430 --> 00:01:53,346 No way! After the "I dos", 39 00:01:53,348 --> 00:01:55,398 it's basically free time. She'll wanna hang out. 40 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:57,400 For me, the question is not who I will bring, 41 00:01:57,402 --> 00:01:59,798 but who I will be! [CHORTLES] 42 00:01:59,800 --> 00:02:02,739 I've been working on a new character, Sandra. 43 00:02:02,740 --> 00:02:06,478 - She's single, by choice, and down to clown! - [GOON GRUNTS] 44 00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:09,538 I guess I'll bring Tabitha of the Hammerhead Clan, 45 00:02:09,540 --> 00:02:11,878 I mean, I am betrothed to her. 46 00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:14,618 [GOONS SCREAMING] 47 00:02:14,620 --> 00:02:16,318 Post-Joker Harley 48 00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:18,759 wants to hook up with as many randos as she can. 49 00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:21,219 Ya bring someone to a wedding, that means you're serious. 50 00:02:21,220 --> 00:02:22,418 Not if you bring a hooker. 51 00:02:22,420 --> 00:02:25,032 You are a vile, pocket-sized man. 52 00:02:25,034 --> 00:02:27,328 I don't want anythin' serious with anybody again. 53 00:02:27,330 --> 00:02:28,968 So, I'm going solo. 54 00:02:28,970 --> 00:02:31,598 The only thing I'm serious about, is gettin' some strange 55 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:35,838 from one or several members of that 12-piece jazz band. 56 00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:36,970 Whoo! 57 00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:42,808 Oh, my God! It's Beyoncé! 58 00:02:42,810 --> 00:02:45,378 Oh, my God. It's Lady Gaga! 59 00:02:45,380 --> 00:02:46,918 Harley Quinn, 60 00:02:46,920 --> 00:02:50,119 I have been expecting you and your insane clown... 61 00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:51,988 - Group. - Psycho. 62 00:02:51,990 --> 00:02:54,788 Ah! No! It's too cold! 63 00:02:54,790 --> 00:02:55,958 I've got brain freeze. 64 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:58,308 I did tell you to wear a jacket. 65 00:02:58,310 --> 00:03:01,658 It is unfortunate that the cold displeases you so much, 66 00:03:01,660 --> 00:03:04,760 as the core temperatures of your bodies are about to 67 00:03:04,762 --> 00:03:06,669 decrease precipitously. 68 00:03:06,670 --> 00:03:09,370 [WHIMPERS IN FEAR] 69 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:22,618 [KITE MAN] Oh, what a dick! 70 00:03:22,620 --> 00:03:24,618 Look what I just got from my nemesis. 71 00:03:24,620 --> 00:03:27,488 [POISON IVY] "Congrats on the engagement. Condiment King"? 72 00:03:27,490 --> 00:03:28,988 What an asshole, right? 73 00:03:28,990 --> 00:03:30,988 Yes, a dick and an asshole. 74 00:03:30,990 --> 00:03:32,898 Wait, why though? Can you just remind me? 75 00:03:32,900 --> 00:03:34,658 Pff! Uh, where do I begin? 76 00:03:34,660 --> 00:03:37,698 No emojis to convey the tone, and a period 77 00:03:37,700 --> 00:03:39,098 instead of an exclamation point? 78 00:03:39,100 --> 00:03:41,068 He's being sarcastic. 79 00:03:41,070 --> 00:03:43,108 But what else should I expect 80 00:03:43,110 --> 00:03:44,331 from my nemesis? 81 00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:45,478 Chuck, are you okay? 82 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:47,378 No! I'm freakin', Pam! 83 00:03:47,380 --> 00:03:48,976 We have to get this wedding venue. 84 00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:51,007 Honey, don't put so much pressure on yourself. 85 00:03:51,009 --> 00:03:52,937 We're just touring one venue, right? 86 00:03:52,939 --> 00:03:55,719 Ah, no. It's not just "one venue". 87 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:57,489 It's the venue! 88 00:03:57,490 --> 00:03:59,688 And if we don't get it, the whole wedding will be rui... 89 00:03:59,690 --> 00:04:00,788 Hey! Relax. 90 00:04:00,790 --> 00:04:03,528 Okay? All we need is a dance floor, booze, 91 00:04:03,530 --> 00:04:06,129 and Kelly Clarkson's greatest hit. We could do it anywhere. 92 00:04:06,130 --> 00:04:08,968 I have been dreaming of getting married 93 00:04:08,970 --> 00:04:10,542 at the old Gotham corn factory 94 00:04:10,544 --> 00:04:13,216 ever since I saw Melanie and Clint Howard's nuptials 95 00:04:13,218 --> 00:04:14,761 in Obscure Celebrity Weddings Yearly. 96 00:04:14,763 --> 00:04:15,862 That photo spread 97 00:04:15,864 --> 00:04:18,180 was like a series of sick Renaissance paintings, 98 00:04:18,182 --> 00:04:19,738 but way sicker. That could be us! 99 00:04:19,740 --> 00:04:21,708 So, yeah, I'm a little on edge. 100 00:04:21,710 --> 00:04:23,508 Well, then what are we waiting for, hon? 101 00:04:23,510 --> 00:04:25,648 - Let's go get that venue. - Hell yeah! 102 00:04:25,650 --> 00:04:28,378 All we have to do is impress the venue manager 103 00:04:28,380 --> 00:04:31,789 with our super dope love, and it is in the bag. 104 00:04:31,790 --> 00:04:33,558 Hey, uh, does this tie go with this kite? 105 00:04:33,560 --> 00:04:35,389 Okay, no tie goes with a kite. 106 00:04:35,390 --> 00:04:37,360 But you do look really handsome. 107 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:41,458 I will now unfreeze you. 108 00:04:41,460 --> 00:04:43,352 Please, do not act as petulant babies, 109 00:04:43,354 --> 00:04:45,998 for I have no intention of killing you. 110 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:48,068 Holy shit! 111 00:04:48,070 --> 00:04:53,078 What are you gonna do to us, you frigid... [STUTTERING] Fuck? 112 00:04:53,080 --> 00:04:55,708 Cursing. Hmph. The crutch of the illiterate. 113 00:04:55,710 --> 00:04:57,349 People call me a murderer, 114 00:04:57,350 --> 00:04:58,592 but that is a misnomer. 115 00:04:58,594 --> 00:05:02,265 You see, I created this lab for the sole purpose of finding 116 00:05:02,267 --> 00:05:06,718 a cure for my wife's incredibly rare blood disease. 117 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,088 It's terminal. Which is sad, 118 00:05:09,090 --> 00:05:10,628 right? 119 00:05:10,630 --> 00:05:13,028 - And yet, there is hope. - [SQUEAKING] 120 00:05:13,030 --> 00:05:15,491 I have been performing a multitude of experiments 121 00:05:15,493 --> 00:05:16,668 on the common snow rat, 122 00:05:16,670 --> 00:05:20,638 which shares 98% of its DNA with that of a human. 123 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:23,410 The experiments have been a rousing success. 124 00:05:25,080 --> 00:05:27,008 - Ah! - This guy's lost his shit! 125 00:05:27,010 --> 00:05:29,540 This is a real shampoo factory. 126 00:05:30,710 --> 00:05:31,750 [SQUEAKING] _ 127 00:05:33,150 --> 00:05:34,442 [GASPS] 128 00:05:34,444 --> 00:05:36,848 Your arrival has proved fortuitous, 129 00:05:36,850 --> 00:05:39,900 as it coincides with my decision to move on 130 00:05:39,902 --> 00:05:42,659 to human experimentation. 131 00:05:42,660 --> 00:05:43,858 [ALL EXCLAIM] 132 00:05:43,860 --> 00:05:46,058 [SQUEAKING] 133 00:05:46,060 --> 00:05:48,498 You know, speakin' doctor to mister, 134 00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:49,898 maybe ya wanna get it right once 135 00:05:49,900 --> 00:05:52,468 with a snow rat before ya move onto humans? 136 00:05:52,470 --> 00:05:55,068 No. I'm 98% sure 137 00:05:55,070 --> 00:05:58,608 that the 2% difference in DNA is the issue. 138 00:05:58,610 --> 00:06:00,708 And now that I have you, Harley, 139 00:06:00,710 --> 00:06:03,254 I can put that theory to the test. 140 00:06:03,256 --> 00:06:05,548 Maybe we pull straws to see who goes first? 141 00:06:05,550 --> 00:06:07,078 He is a man shark, 142 00:06:07,080 --> 00:06:09,018 he is like an aged little boy, 143 00:06:09,020 --> 00:06:11,149 and, hmm... A dirt man? 144 00:06:11,150 --> 00:06:14,138 Yeah. Thus, you, being not only a human, 145 00:06:14,140 --> 00:06:16,129 but also a human woman, are the 146 00:06:16,130 --> 00:06:17,130 - ideal subject. - Hey! 147 00:06:19,460 --> 00:06:20,900 [GRUNTS] 148 00:06:22,970 --> 00:06:24,100 [GOON SCREAMS] 149 00:06:25,670 --> 00:06:30,569 [GRUNTS] 150 00:06:30,570 --> 00:06:31,570 [HARLEY] Ah! 151 00:06:32,810 --> 00:06:34,638 Fuck, again? 152 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:37,578 I do not know how much this will hurt, due to the fact 153 00:06:37,580 --> 00:06:39,806 that complete loss of bodily functions 154 00:06:39,808 --> 00:06:41,848 can mean any number of things. 155 00:06:41,850 --> 00:06:44,434 But, were I to venture a guess, 156 00:06:44,436 --> 00:06:47,206 I'd say that it will... sting a little. 157 00:06:50,230 --> 00:06:52,528 Wait! I know how we can save your wife! 158 00:06:52,530 --> 00:06:55,668 You're only saying you'll save her life to save your own. 159 00:06:55,670 --> 00:06:58,485 So what, you don't want me savin' your wife's life? Okay, I won't. 160 00:06:58,487 --> 00:07:01,538 Hey, relax, relax. Let's not jump to conclusions. 161 00:07:01,540 --> 00:07:02,868 This is a negotiation. 162 00:07:02,870 --> 00:07:05,138 How do you propose to perform this miracle? 163 00:07:05,140 --> 00:07:07,939 My friend's a doctor and the smartest person I know. 164 00:07:07,940 --> 00:07:11,008 Wow! That's the nicest thing you've ever said about me. 165 00:07:11,010 --> 00:07:12,548 Not you, idiot. Ivy. 166 00:07:12,550 --> 00:07:13,672 Yeah, that makes sense. 167 00:07:13,674 --> 00:07:15,548 Look, freeze, Ivy's a genius biochemist. 168 00:07:15,550 --> 00:07:16,819 If she can't find a cure, 169 00:07:16,820 --> 00:07:17,918 there isn't one. 170 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:19,958 Why would Dr. Isley help me? 171 00:07:19,960 --> 00:07:21,919 She wouldn't, but she'll help me. 172 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:23,559 Now, let me out of these restraints, 173 00:07:23,560 --> 00:07:24,781 I'll shoot her a quick text 174 00:07:24,783 --> 00:07:26,958 and she'll come fix your wife up lickety-split. 175 00:07:26,960 --> 00:07:28,928 This is an agreeable proposition. 176 00:07:28,930 --> 00:07:31,798 There is only one thing we can do while we wait... 177 00:07:31,800 --> 00:07:33,598 [DRAMATIC MUSIC] 178 00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:35,038 Lunch! 179 00:07:35,040 --> 00:07:36,808 I will go make preparations. 180 00:07:36,810 --> 00:07:39,978 Any food allergies or phobias I should be aware of? 181 00:07:39,980 --> 00:07:41,680 No? Ha! Wonderful. 182 00:07:44,710 --> 00:07:47,549 [HARLEY GRUNTS] 183 00:07:47,550 --> 00:07:49,519 Harley, look, I don't want to question your plan, 184 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,048 but do you really think Ivy can find a cure? 185 00:07:52,050 --> 00:07:55,031 I mean, Freeze will for sure kill us if she doesn't. 186 00:07:55,033 --> 00:07:56,371 So we're just breezing past the whole, 187 00:07:56,373 --> 00:07:57,952 "he's preparing us lunch" thing? 188 00:07:57,954 --> 00:08:00,408 No idea, but I'm not bringin' her here and puttin' her in danger. 189 00:08:00,410 --> 00:08:02,039 I'm buyin' us time. 190 00:08:02,040 --> 00:08:05,077 This weirdo is all gross and obsessed with his dumb, dying wife. 191 00:08:05,079 --> 00:08:06,619 Some might call that "love"? 192 00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:09,139 Whatever. If we take her hostage and threaten to kill her, 193 00:08:09,141 --> 00:08:11,739 we can get him to give us his freeze ray. And then, 194 00:08:11,740 --> 00:08:15,269 we can freeze his ass in a block of ice! 195 00:08:15,271 --> 00:08:18,808 Wow. Great plan. This is one of your best. 196 00:08:18,810 --> 00:08:20,229 I got one question though. 197 00:08:20,230 --> 00:08:23,118 How the hell are we supposed to find his wife, 198 00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:24,848 when we're frozen to chairs? 199 00:08:24,850 --> 00:08:26,888 Could someone pass the mac and cheese? 200 00:08:26,890 --> 00:08:28,188 Oh, my God. 201 00:08:28,190 --> 00:08:30,688 What? If I'm going to pull off the plan, 202 00:08:30,690 --> 00:08:33,158 I need sustenance. 203 00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:35,628 The reason I wanted to do this lunch is, 204 00:08:35,630 --> 00:08:37,098 Nora hasn't hosted guests 205 00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:39,460 in quite some time. So I thought, 206 00:08:39,462 --> 00:08:41,738 this will be fun for her. 207 00:08:41,740 --> 00:08:43,638 Her options are limited. 208 00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:46,838 Jesus, that blue perv gets his jollies by freezin' women. 209 00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:51,678 Everyone, let us begin consumption of the bounty I have prepared. 210 00:08:51,680 --> 00:08:54,598 Okay, change of plans. As a former ice-block victim 211 00:08:54,600 --> 00:08:57,688 and now champion of ice-blocked women all over the world, 212 00:08:57,690 --> 00:08:59,888 I decided we're gonna save his wife first, 213 00:08:59,890 --> 00:09:01,288 then kill him. 214 00:09:01,290 --> 00:09:03,228 [KITE MAN] Four minutes early, perfect. 215 00:09:03,230 --> 00:09:04,728 Eager, but not desperate. 216 00:09:04,730 --> 00:09:07,228 That's late in my book, bro. 217 00:09:07,230 --> 00:09:09,698 Mitchell, what the hell are you doing here? 218 00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:11,698 Oh. Didn't you hear? 219 00:09:11,700 --> 00:09:13,698 - You're not the only world-famous villain... - [IVY SCOFFS] 220 00:09:13,700 --> 00:09:14,968 ... engaged in this town. 221 00:09:14,970 --> 00:09:17,534 I'm sorry, "world-famous"? Come on. 222 00:09:17,536 --> 00:09:21,208 Wedding venues are tough to come by in new New Gotham. 223 00:09:21,210 --> 00:09:24,008 And there's only one unbooked weekend left. 224 00:09:24,010 --> 00:09:26,248 So, it looks like you've got some competish 225 00:09:26,250 --> 00:09:28,948 from the Condiment King. 226 00:09:28,950 --> 00:09:30,552 [LAUGHS] 227 00:09:30,554 --> 00:09:33,573 I'm not getting married in any place with the stink of condiments. 228 00:09:33,575 --> 00:09:36,583 And I'm not getting married anywhere that reeks of kite! 229 00:09:36,585 --> 00:09:38,858 Oh, yeah. Kites are odorless. 230 00:09:38,860 --> 00:09:42,929 Unless, uh... They do get wet or if you store them improperly, I... 231 00:09:42,930 --> 00:09:45,119 Chuck, we can do this wherever. 232 00:09:45,121 --> 00:09:47,338 I will not yield! 233 00:09:47,340 --> 00:09:49,901 Once the manager sees the biggest power couple in Gotham 234 00:09:49,903 --> 00:09:52,108 is in his presence, and how sick our love is, 235 00:09:52,110 --> 00:09:53,709 he'll kick your ranch-loving ass 236 00:09:53,710 --> 00:09:55,596 all the way back to the Hidden Valley. 237 00:09:55,598 --> 00:09:58,710 Gonna be tough to impress him with that stain on your suit. 238 00:09:58,712 --> 00:10:00,878 [STAMMERING] What stain? There's no stain! 239 00:10:00,880 --> 00:10:01,949 Ah! 240 00:10:01,950 --> 00:10:03,018 That one. 241 00:10:03,020 --> 00:10:04,788 [LAUGHS] 242 00:10:04,790 --> 00:10:07,741 All right, Condiment King, Becca, you got here first, 243 00:10:07,743 --> 00:10:09,774 so let me take you on the tour. 244 00:10:09,776 --> 00:10:11,606 For the schmutz on your suit. 245 00:10:14,730 --> 00:10:17,328 [CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING] 246 00:10:17,330 --> 00:10:18,330 [MR. FREEZE] Mmm... 247 00:10:18,331 --> 00:10:19,368 [SLURPS] 248 00:10:19,370 --> 00:10:20,542 [CHUCKLES] 249 00:10:20,544 --> 00:10:22,700 Why's he doing that? What's wrong with your face? 250 00:10:22,702 --> 00:10:25,394 Small man, as the consumption of cooked meats 251 00:10:25,396 --> 00:10:28,838 increases my body temperature and puts me at risk of death, 252 00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:33,248 please, a little favor. Describe the mouthfeel of your steak. 253 00:10:33,250 --> 00:10:36,348 Um... 254 00:10:36,350 --> 00:10:37,388 Butter-like? 255 00:10:37,390 --> 00:10:40,188 Mmm, like butter. Yes. 256 00:10:40,190 --> 00:10:43,128 All right, this is some weird Silence of the Lambs shit. 257 00:10:43,130 --> 00:10:46,128 Ah! I see you found your appetite, 258 00:10:46,130 --> 00:10:49,880 my eager little snow rat. 259 00:10:51,900 --> 00:10:54,338 So, how'd y'all meet? 260 00:10:54,340 --> 00:10:56,338 Was she alive then? 261 00:10:56,340 --> 00:10:59,810 It's a funny story. Nora, you tell it better than I do. 262 00:11:02,010 --> 00:11:04,178 Oh, she's being shy. [CHUCKLES] 263 00:11:04,180 --> 00:11:05,209 I'll tell it. 264 00:11:05,210 --> 00:11:08,349 Nora was the owner of a mom-and-pop cryogenics lab, 265 00:11:08,350 --> 00:11:10,448 and I was determined to squash it. 266 00:11:10,450 --> 00:11:13,919 You see, as the CEO of a multinational corporation, 267 00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:15,858 I had a duty to my shareholders. 268 00:11:15,860 --> 00:11:17,358 Expand or die. 269 00:11:17,360 --> 00:11:19,671 Now, seemingly unrelated, 270 00:11:19,673 --> 00:11:23,368 I had really hit it off with an enchanting stranger online. 271 00:11:23,370 --> 00:11:25,568 You'll never guess who it was. 272 00:11:25,570 --> 00:11:26,968 - Your wife. - Meg Ryan? 273 00:11:26,970 --> 00:11:28,268 - Nora. - Yeah. Like I said, 274 00:11:28,270 --> 00:11:29,338 she tells it better. 275 00:11:29,340 --> 00:11:31,308 [CHUCKLES] Huzzah! 276 00:11:31,310 --> 00:11:33,478 A meet-cute for the ages. 277 00:11:33,480 --> 00:11:36,079 All I hear is a story of a big swinging dick 278 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:38,078 coming in and ruining a woman's livelihood. 279 00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:39,478 Oh, you grinch. 280 00:11:39,480 --> 00:11:41,918 Look, you'll have to excuse my friend here. 281 00:11:41,920 --> 00:11:44,042 She's all sour on love right now. 282 00:11:44,044 --> 00:11:47,118 Yeah, she's not even taking a date to her best friend's wedding. 283 00:11:47,120 --> 00:11:49,158 Ooh, is there turmeric in this? 284 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:51,219 That is a swift kick, nice. 285 00:11:51,220 --> 00:11:52,552 I suspect your cynicism comes 286 00:11:52,554 --> 00:11:54,829 from never having experienced true love. 287 00:11:54,830 --> 00:11:56,399 Oh, yeah, this is definitely turmeric. 288 00:11:56,400 --> 00:11:59,368 I'll tell you about true love, you fuckin' bitch! 289 00:11:59,370 --> 00:12:03,068 True love made me sacrifice my career as a psychologist, 290 00:12:03,070 --> 00:12:04,938 permanently change the way I look, 291 00:12:04,940 --> 00:12:08,238 and almost got me killed, like, so many times. 292 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,508 Love is bullshit! 293 00:12:10,510 --> 00:12:14,948 [DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING] 294 00:12:14,950 --> 00:12:17,180 - [OVEN DINGS] - Oh, spinach puffs. 295 00:12:21,190 --> 00:12:23,372 I will never forgive Joker 296 00:12:23,374 --> 00:12:25,628 for the damage he's done to your heart. 297 00:12:25,630 --> 00:12:27,599 Making you give up on love 298 00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:30,398 was perhaps his greatest crime of all. 299 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:32,998 I'm also willing to bet that your outburst 300 00:12:33,000 --> 00:12:35,038 nearly cost us spinach puffs. 301 00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:37,138 Who cares about the puffs? 302 00:12:37,140 --> 00:12:39,408 We're imprisoned by the person we came here to kill! 303 00:12:39,410 --> 00:12:40,878 We need to get that gun. 304 00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:42,878 I'm just eating my feelings. 305 00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:46,318 His story was so moving. [CHUCKLING AND CHEWING] 306 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:47,648 Problem solved. 307 00:12:47,650 --> 00:12:50,188 Not entirely. The steak is under-seasoned, 308 00:12:50,190 --> 00:12:53,388 and there doesn't seem to be a grain of salt on the table. 309 00:12:53,390 --> 00:12:55,358 God! Your stupidity is astounding. 310 00:12:55,360 --> 00:12:57,958 Clayface, grab the gun, de-ice us, then give me the gun. 311 00:12:57,960 --> 00:13:00,528 - Great plan, boss! - Unbelievable. 312 00:13:00,530 --> 00:13:03,735 Do me first. I'm so cold, my nuts are the size of Dippin' Dots! 313 00:13:03,737 --> 00:13:05,168 Is that unusual for you? 314 00:13:05,170 --> 00:13:06,438 What? No! 315 00:13:06,440 --> 00:13:08,608 I have regular-sized... 316 00:13:08,610 --> 00:13:09,672 Whoopsies! 317 00:13:09,674 --> 00:13:12,944 I think I speak for me and Harley, when I say, thank you. 318 00:13:12,946 --> 00:13:15,238 Let me find this. Ah, there we are. 319 00:13:15,240 --> 00:13:16,508 ... testes! 320 00:13:16,510 --> 00:13:18,521 Sure, they're store-bought, but you... 321 00:13:18,523 --> 00:13:21,978 Listen up, you crazy asshole. 322 00:13:21,980 --> 00:13:23,988 I'm not buyin' your bullshit story! 323 00:13:23,990 --> 00:13:25,388 I know your wife ain't sick. 324 00:13:25,390 --> 00:13:27,059 She probably tried to leave you, 325 00:13:27,060 --> 00:13:29,479 and you couldn't handle it, so you fuckin' froze her. 326 00:13:29,481 --> 00:13:32,088 - What are you doing? - Giving her the freedom you denied. 327 00:13:32,090 --> 00:13:34,758 You're just like my ex, you creepy control freak. 328 00:13:34,760 --> 00:13:36,945 Nora's not your property anymore! 329 00:13:36,947 --> 00:13:38,569 Harley, you don't know what you're doing! 330 00:13:38,570 --> 00:13:41,138 This is for ruining her small business. 331 00:13:41,140 --> 00:13:43,069 Ahhh! 332 00:13:43,070 --> 00:13:44,882 Now that you don't have your stupid gun, 333 00:13:44,884 --> 00:13:46,278 I'm gonna kill you. 334 00:13:46,280 --> 00:13:47,432 [NORA COUGHING] 335 00:13:47,434 --> 00:13:50,208 See? I told ya she was fine, ya piece of shit! 336 00:13:50,210 --> 00:13:52,978 My love, that I gaze upon your face 337 00:13:52,980 --> 00:13:54,418 can only mean one thing. 338 00:13:54,420 --> 00:13:56,078 You've found a cure! 339 00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:57,388 I'm not going to die 340 00:13:57,390 --> 00:13:59,859 of this incredibly rare blood disease anymore, 341 00:13:59,860 --> 00:14:02,318 and we can spend the rest of our lives together. 342 00:14:02,320 --> 00:14:04,558 [GASPS, SIGHS] 343 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:05,628 I'm sorry, what was that? 344 00:14:05,630 --> 00:14:07,628 You've condemned her to death. 345 00:14:07,630 --> 00:14:09,729 You better hope your friend Ivy can find a cure, 346 00:14:09,730 --> 00:14:11,968 or I'm going to blow this entire place up 347 00:14:11,970 --> 00:14:13,800 and kill us all. 348 00:14:21,080 --> 00:14:24,178 Right. Let me check on her ETA. 349 00:14:24,180 --> 00:14:25,689 Wait. You're telling me aioli 350 00:14:25,691 --> 00:14:27,721 is just mayo mixed with something else? 351 00:14:27,723 --> 00:14:30,188 Little bit of an industry secret. [CHUCKLES] 352 00:14:30,190 --> 00:14:32,871 - It goes great on corn. - Get outta town! 353 00:14:32,873 --> 00:14:34,419 No, don't get outta town, you got a wedding. 354 00:14:34,420 --> 00:14:35,558 [GASPS] Oh, hi! 355 00:14:35,560 --> 00:14:38,628 I thought I smelled a kite. 356 00:14:38,630 --> 00:14:40,098 [LAUGHS] 357 00:14:40,100 --> 00:14:41,998 Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez! 358 00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:44,098 Look at those two, thick as thieves. 359 00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:45,569 Dreams are stupid. 360 00:14:45,570 --> 00:14:47,238 Never gonna get this place. We should just leave. 361 00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:49,038 Hey! Hey! Up here. 362 00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,208 Okay? Fuck that guy, he's a dick. 363 00:14:51,210 --> 00:14:53,638 I know how important this is to you, okay, so I'm prepared. 364 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:54,649 We're gonna go in there, 365 00:14:54,650 --> 00:14:57,308 we're gonna blow that manager's goddamn socks off. 366 00:14:57,310 --> 00:14:59,448 - [STEW] And this is, of course... - [KITE MAN] The staircase, 367 00:14:59,450 --> 00:15:01,603 made famous by Mr. And Mrs. Clint Howard. 368 00:15:01,605 --> 00:15:03,118 It was the cover shot. 369 00:15:03,120 --> 00:15:05,358 Ah, ooph! I've got goose bumps. 370 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:06,719 Do you think this place 371 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,737 is just a wedding mill for Hollywood royalty? 372 00:15:08,739 --> 00:15:10,089 Oh, no. Of course not. 373 00:15:10,090 --> 00:15:11,704 I mean, the old Gotham corn factory 374 00:15:11,706 --> 00:15:13,399 is just so rich with history. 375 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:15,129 You know, I think that's what we really connect with. 376 00:15:15,130 --> 00:15:17,568 Oh, really? What exactly do you know 377 00:15:17,570 --> 00:15:19,598 - about this place? - [CELL PHONE RINGS] 378 00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:22,169 Ah! It's Harley, and she never calls... 379 00:15:22,170 --> 00:15:24,668 eleven times, unless it's an emergency. 380 00:15:24,670 --> 00:15:28,208 [SIGHING] Ha! Uh, corn... 381 00:15:28,210 --> 00:15:31,078 Um, the maize... Yeah, venue... 382 00:15:31,080 --> 00:15:35,348 Ah, fiancée... The love... Um, well, uh, 383 00:15:35,350 --> 00:15:37,688 you know, Per... I'm a husk guy. 384 00:15:37,690 --> 00:15:39,802 - So, uh... - Babe, I'm so sorry, 385 00:15:39,804 --> 00:15:41,869 Harley's gotten herself into some serious trouble, 386 00:15:41,871 --> 00:15:43,699 and I have to go save her. I'm sorry. I love you. I love you! 387 00:15:43,701 --> 00:15:45,744 - [BLOWS KISS] - So you were about to enlighten me 388 00:15:45,746 --> 00:15:48,358 on your personal connection to corn? 389 00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:50,228 Uh... 390 00:15:50,230 --> 00:15:51,698 Um... 391 00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:52,700 Uh... 392 00:15:58,470 --> 00:16:00,608 Did I misread the situation? Yes. 393 00:16:00,610 --> 00:16:03,378 But Ive, if you'd seen him feed her soup, you'da done the same. 394 00:16:03,380 --> 00:16:05,418 They'll find a cure, my love. 395 00:16:05,420 --> 00:16:08,848 But if they don't, we will die together. 396 00:16:08,850 --> 00:16:11,448 Because I'm blowing the whole place up! 397 00:16:11,450 --> 00:16:12,782 No, you are not! 398 00:16:12,784 --> 00:16:13,977 Hey, would it speed things up 399 00:16:13,979 --> 00:16:15,548 if I got ya a microscope for the other eye? 400 00:16:15,550 --> 00:16:17,432 Yeah, no. But BTdubs, 401 00:16:17,434 --> 00:16:19,446 thanks so much for getting me involved in this. 402 00:16:19,448 --> 00:16:21,669 I actively tried not to put ya in the situation. 403 00:16:21,671 --> 00:16:22,862 And then what happened? 404 00:16:22,864 --> 00:16:25,158 - Well then, I... I fucked up the situation. - There it is. 405 00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:26,399 I didn't know what else to do! 406 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:28,941 Other than call the smartest, coolest, hottest person I know. 407 00:16:28,943 --> 00:16:30,075 Well, that is true. 408 00:16:30,077 --> 00:16:31,668 Look, Freeze is crazy! 409 00:16:31,670 --> 00:16:34,239 He orchestrated the whole Injustice League hit on me. 410 00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:35,279 How absurd. 411 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:37,308 I woke up in a block of ice. 412 00:16:37,310 --> 00:16:40,069 That's your signature move! You tried to kill me! 413 00:16:40,071 --> 00:16:42,122 Everyone else wanted to kill you, 414 00:16:42,124 --> 00:16:44,448 but I convinced them to freeze you. 415 00:16:44,450 --> 00:16:46,159 As you can imagine, 416 00:16:46,160 --> 00:16:47,282 a group of white, 417 00:16:47,284 --> 00:16:50,258 cis-gendered, heterosexual, male, crime lords, 418 00:16:50,260 --> 00:16:52,258 they loved the idea of turning a woman 419 00:16:52,260 --> 00:16:54,458 into a helpless object of mockery. 420 00:16:54,460 --> 00:16:57,728 - Oh. - Well, I hope you're proud of yourself. 421 00:16:57,730 --> 00:17:01,139 You've falsely accused the most woke ice-themed villain 422 00:17:01,140 --> 00:17:03,539 in all of new New Gotham. 423 00:17:03,540 --> 00:17:06,638 Okay, this is crazy, but I think I might have our answer. 424 00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:10,379 Uh... 425 00:17:10,380 --> 00:17:12,218 - [CELL PHONE RINGS, BUZZES] - Oh, thank God. 426 00:17:12,220 --> 00:17:14,718 I... I gotta take this. Sup, babe-arino? 427 00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,419 Ah, yeah... Oh. Your old greenhouse? Yeah... 428 00:17:17,420 --> 00:17:18,818 Hey, remember when we were there 429 00:17:18,820 --> 00:17:20,298 and I had a couple too many margs, 430 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:22,758 and next thing you know... Oh... Oh, it is urgent? 431 00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:24,488 Anything for you. 432 00:17:24,490 --> 00:17:27,083 My betrothed needs the K-man ASAP. 433 00:17:27,085 --> 00:17:28,352 If you leave right now, 434 00:17:28,354 --> 00:17:30,629 this is definitely going to affect my decision. 435 00:17:30,630 --> 00:17:32,738 Positively? Because you'll see 436 00:17:32,740 --> 00:17:35,908 how much I love my fiancée and will do anything for her, 437 00:17:35,910 --> 00:17:37,091 which is far more important 438 00:17:37,093 --> 00:17:39,368 than any corn connection we might have? 439 00:17:39,370 --> 00:17:41,608 - Absolutely not. - Well... 440 00:17:41,610 --> 00:17:43,910 The things we do for love, right? 441 00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:48,520 [SIGHS] 442 00:17:48,521 --> 00:17:50,112 I wouldn't know. 443 00:17:50,114 --> 00:17:52,253 Just to double-check, what color petals am I looking for? 444 00:17:52,255 --> 00:17:54,412 - [POISON IVY] Magenta. - [KITE MAN] Right, right. 445 00:17:54,414 --> 00:17:55,889 That... That's like a reddish pink? 446 00:17:55,890 --> 00:17:57,617 No, no. It's a purplish pink. 447 00:17:57,619 --> 00:18:00,358 Don't touch the reddish pink ones, they're paralytic, okay? 448 00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:02,968 Cool. And, uh, ballpark, 449 00:18:02,970 --> 00:18:05,198 uh, how long does that take to kick in... 450 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:06,538 [STAMMERS] You know what? 451 00:18:06,540 --> 00:18:07,818 Doesn't matter, 452 00:18:07,820 --> 00:18:11,334 'cause I definitely didn't touch the reddish pink one. 453 00:18:11,336 --> 00:18:13,301 There in a few. 454 00:18:13,303 --> 00:18:14,503 Oh, boy! 455 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,358 Ah! [GROANING] 456 00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,360 [GRUNTS] 457 00:18:39,270 --> 00:18:40,938 [GROANING] 458 00:18:40,940 --> 00:18:42,568 I touched the reddish pink one. 459 00:18:42,570 --> 00:18:43,761 Uh, yeah, I see that. 460 00:18:43,763 --> 00:18:45,363 Don't worry, it's... It's gonna wear off. 461 00:18:46,910 --> 00:18:48,680 Okay, looks good. 462 00:18:50,210 --> 00:18:52,921 Okay, so Nora needs a blood transfusion, 463 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:54,249 but unfortunately, her blood type 464 00:18:54,250 --> 00:18:55,732 is as rare as her blood disease. 465 00:18:55,734 --> 00:18:57,571 Ever my unique butterfly. 466 00:18:57,573 --> 00:18:58,871 Once you inject this serum, 467 00:18:58,873 --> 00:19:00,558 it will change your blood type to Nora's. 468 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:03,388 And then, we can give your healthy blood to your wife. 469 00:19:03,390 --> 00:19:05,498 [IMITATING BORAT] "Your wife!" 470 00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:08,628 But, the transfusion will kill you. 471 00:19:08,630 --> 00:19:10,798 [ALL GASP] 472 00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:12,115 My condolences. 473 00:19:12,117 --> 00:19:14,668 Why the hell did you have to say the death part? 474 00:19:14,670 --> 00:19:16,868 Now he's going to make one of us do it! 475 00:19:16,870 --> 00:19:19,608 Well, I've never been more thankful for my shark blood. 476 00:19:19,610 --> 00:19:21,133 And, as previously stated, 477 00:19:21,135 --> 00:19:24,708 I am a dirt thing, so it won't work on me. 478 00:19:24,710 --> 00:19:25,978 This is bullshit. 479 00:19:25,980 --> 00:19:28,578 No, it must be my sacrifice. 480 00:19:28,580 --> 00:19:30,688 The only reason I've suffered through life 481 00:19:30,690 --> 00:19:32,988 in this godforsaken cryo-suit, 482 00:19:32,990 --> 00:19:34,988 is to find a cure for Nora. 483 00:19:34,990 --> 00:19:36,858 If that time has come, 484 00:19:36,860 --> 00:19:39,798 then I greet my end with open arms. 485 00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:41,458 Holy shit, that's insane. 486 00:19:41,460 --> 00:19:43,528 It is not insane, 487 00:19:43,530 --> 00:19:45,668 for if you truly love someone, 488 00:19:45,670 --> 00:19:48,390 you will do anything for them. 489 00:20:08,360 --> 00:20:10,030 My beautiful girl. 490 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:14,658 Goodbye, my love. 491 00:20:14,660 --> 00:20:19,640 Have the life I could never give you. 492 00:20:20,970 --> 00:20:23,310 I will never stop loving you. 493 00:20:36,450 --> 00:20:37,450 No! 494 00:20:37,451 --> 00:20:40,859 [CRYING] 495 00:20:40,860 --> 00:20:41,860 [SOBBING] 496 00:20:41,860 --> 00:20:42,860 Oh, God! 497 00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:46,098 I'm feeling feelings! 498 00:20:46,100 --> 00:20:49,768 I've never seen truer love than that. 499 00:20:49,770 --> 00:20:53,138 Damn. That's nothin' like what Joker and I had. 500 00:20:53,140 --> 00:20:54,798 I guess that would be kinda nice. 501 00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,708 Oh. Don't be too hard on yourself. 502 00:20:56,710 --> 00:20:58,508 We've all been in toxic relationships 503 00:20:58,510 --> 00:21:00,708 that skewed our thoughts on love. 504 00:21:00,710 --> 00:21:02,079 Leslie. 505 00:21:02,080 --> 00:21:04,578 Chin up, Harls. I mean, if I can find true love, 506 00:21:04,580 --> 00:21:06,118 then there's hope for you too. 507 00:21:06,120 --> 00:21:08,133 I'm so happy for you guys. 508 00:21:08,135 --> 00:21:09,990 [NORA SOBBING] 509 00:21:11,050 --> 00:21:13,418 And my condolences to you. 510 00:21:13,420 --> 00:21:15,528 He seemed like a really great guy. 511 00:21:15,530 --> 00:21:16,759 Yeah, good guy. 512 00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:19,129 - So, so sorry. - He was a real mensch. 513 00:21:19,130 --> 00:21:21,498 Can we go now? 514 00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:24,500 Oh, my God! Get out of here! 515 00:21:27,640 --> 00:21:30,669 Babe, I'm just... I'm so sorry that I left the venue. 516 00:21:30,670 --> 00:21:32,039 I know how much this meant to you, 517 00:21:32,040 --> 00:21:33,773 and I hope I didn't mess it all up. 518 00:21:33,775 --> 00:21:36,908 While I totes appreesh the apology, I realized something today. 519 00:21:36,910 --> 00:21:39,948 It doesn't matter where we get married, 520 00:21:39,950 --> 00:21:44,048 the only thing that matters, is that I get to marry you. 521 00:21:44,050 --> 00:21:46,458 I don't even care about the ven... 522 00:21:46,460 --> 00:21:47,542 [PHONE RINGS] 523 00:21:47,544 --> 00:21:49,489 I knew my selfless gesture would be rewarded. 524 00:21:49,490 --> 00:21:51,528 Ah! It's just like the end of a rom-com! 525 00:21:51,530 --> 00:21:53,488 You're go for the K-man. 526 00:21:53,490 --> 00:21:57,028 Hope you had a backup venue, you kited douche! 527 00:21:57,030 --> 00:21:58,668 - [CONDIMENT KING LAUGHING] - Mitchell? 528 00:21:58,670 --> 00:21:59,921 No, put Stew on. 529 00:21:59,923 --> 00:22:02,638 - No, he's right. - [LAUGHS] Looks like you didn't... 530 00:22:02,640 --> 00:22:05,538 "cut the mustard". [LAUGHS] 531 00:22:05,540 --> 00:22:07,208 Oh, Jesus, here we go. 532 00:22:07,210 --> 00:22:11,608 You'll always be trying to "ketchup" to me. 533 00:22:11,610 --> 00:22:13,548 - [LAUGHS] - He can't be serious. 534 00:22:13,550 --> 00:22:16,718 [LAUGHS] "Mayo" have a good day. 535 00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:17,848 He is. 536 00:22:17,850 --> 00:22:19,588 "Tartar" for now. 537 00:22:19,590 --> 00:22:20,858 Closer. 538 00:22:20,860 --> 00:22:22,660 I think he's my nemesis now, too. 539 00:22:23,530 --> 00:22:25,582 [THEME MUSIC PLAYING] 540 00:22:25,584 --> 00:22:28,584 - Synced and corrected by Firefly - - www.addic7ed.com - 39977

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