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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:34,625 --> 00:00:35,955 Previously on The Affair: 2 00:00:36,041 --> 00:00:38,211 Mr. Solloway, you, uh, got a second? 3 00:00:38,291 --> 00:00:40,541 -What's up? -I was, um, wondering if you 4 00:00:40,625 --> 00:00:43,035 could take a look at this other thing I've been working on. 5 00:00:43,125 --> 00:00:45,785 -You reapplying to Princeton? -Maybe. I don't... I don't know. 6 00:00:45,875 --> 00:00:47,625 [assistant] Mr. Solloway, Principal Wilson's on the phone 7 00:00:47,709 --> 00:00:49,879 with the president of the board. You shouldn't-- 8 00:00:49,959 --> 00:00:52,039 -Are you firing me? -What-what's going on? 9 00:00:52,125 --> 00:00:53,995 -Why are you here? -I thought you should read this. 10 00:00:54,083 --> 00:00:56,003 Don't tell him I gave it to you. 11 00:00:56,083 --> 00:00:59,293 -I owe you an apology. -No, no, I-I barged in. 12 00:00:59,375 --> 00:01:02,205 -So, you still my boss? -I'm on probation. 13 00:01:02,291 --> 00:01:04,581 Next week, I have to supplicate to the board. 14 00:01:04,667 --> 00:01:06,247 Thank you for this. 15 00:01:06,333 --> 00:01:09,043 I'll read it over and figure out what to do. 16 00:01:09,125 --> 00:01:11,075 [Noah] I'm happy to brainstorm with you. 17 00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,210 [Anton] Forgot my history book. 18 00:01:14,291 --> 00:01:16,501 I got my quiz tomorrow, and... 19 00:01:16,583 --> 00:01:18,673 -Mom? -We were just, um, 20 00:01:18,750 --> 00:01:20,040 discussing your Princeton essay. 21 00:01:20,125 --> 00:01:21,875 -You showed her? -Princeton? Again? 22 00:01:21,959 --> 00:01:23,209 [Janelle] He wants to go to the school. 23 00:01:23,291 --> 00:01:24,461 [Carl] We made a decision. 24 00:01:24,542 --> 00:01:26,132 [Janelle] Just read the damn thing! 25 00:01:26,208 --> 00:01:29,168 Nellie, let's just admit what this is actually about. 26 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:31,290 You were never gonna let him stay here for school. 27 00:01:31,375 --> 00:01:33,125 [Nan] No one drives all the way across the country 28 00:01:33,208 --> 00:01:35,498 just to see about a surfboard. 29 00:01:35,583 --> 00:01:37,883 [Cole] Truth is I'm in love with somebody else. 30 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:40,329 I'm gonna tell her how I feel. So I'm going home. 31 00:01:40,417 --> 00:01:42,417 I'm so glad that you guys moved in here. 32 00:01:42,500 --> 00:01:44,880 The last people had a very stagnant energy. 33 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:47,079 But you... your being is, like... 34 00:01:47,166 --> 00:01:49,206 it's a little... [clicks tongue] 35 00:01:49,291 --> 00:01:51,041 -It is? -Yeah, I don't know. 36 00:01:51,125 --> 00:01:52,825 I-I guess we'll find out. 37 00:01:52,917 --> 00:01:55,037 [Vik] I'm going to die. 38 00:01:55,125 --> 00:01:58,665 And I haven't really made a single choice 39 00:01:58,750 --> 00:02:00,290 for myself. 40 00:02:02,041 --> 00:02:03,671 [Sierra] I am going to Joshua Tree. 41 00:02:03,750 --> 00:02:06,330 We go out there a couple times a year to do a moon circle. 42 00:02:06,417 --> 00:02:07,827 -Do you want to come? -I totally, totally don't. 43 00:02:07,917 --> 00:02:09,077 -Oh, okay. -Okay? 44 00:02:09,166 --> 00:02:10,286 Cool. 45 00:02:10,375 --> 00:02:12,535 I have pancreatic cancer. 46 00:02:12,625 --> 00:02:13,535 I am going to die. 47 00:02:13,625 --> 00:02:14,875 What do you want me to do? 48 00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:17,289 I told you, I want to have a baby. 49 00:02:17,375 --> 00:02:19,325 If you really want to do something for me, 50 00:02:19,417 --> 00:02:21,167 you can do that. 51 00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:32,877 ♪ I was screaming into the canyon ♪ 52 00:02:32,959 --> 00:02:35,959 ♪ At the moment of my death ♪ 53 00:02:36,041 --> 00:02:39,581 ♪ The echo I created ♪ 54 00:02:39,667 --> 00:02:43,167 ♪ Outlasted my last breath ♪ 55 00:02:43,250 --> 00:02:46,290 ♪ My voice it made an avalanche ♪ 56 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:49,375 ♪ And buried a man I never knew ♪ 57 00:02:49,458 --> 00:02:52,578 ♪ And when he died, his widowed bride ♪ 58 00:02:52,667 --> 00:02:55,167 ♪ Met your daddy and they made you ♪ 59 00:02:55,250 --> 00:02:57,380 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 60 00:02:57,458 --> 00:02:59,538 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 61 00:02:59,625 --> 00:03:02,165 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 62 00:03:02,250 --> 00:03:04,170 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 63 00:03:04,250 --> 00:03:06,290 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 64 00:03:06,375 --> 00:03:08,325 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 65 00:03:08,417 --> 00:03:10,537 ♪ I have only one thing to do ♪ 66 00:03:10,625 --> 00:03:13,035 ♪ And that's be the wave that I am, and then ♪ 67 00:03:13,125 --> 00:03:16,285 ♪ Sink back into the ocean, sink back into the ocean ♪ 68 00:03:16,375 --> 00:03:18,035 ♪ Sink back into the o... ♪ 69 00:03:18,125 --> 00:03:19,205 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 70 00:03:19,291 --> 00:03:21,211 ♪ Sink back into the o... ♪ 71 00:03:21,291 --> 00:03:23,001 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 72 00:03:23,083 --> 00:03:25,043 ♪ Sink back into the ocean ♪ 73 00:03:42,250 --> 00:03:44,500 [soft background music playing] 74 00:03:51,625 --> 00:03:53,625 Excuse me. 75 00:03:53,709 --> 00:03:55,669 Do you know where I can find rolled oats? 76 00:03:55,750 --> 00:03:57,540 Aisle four, beside the granola. 77 00:03:57,625 --> 00:03:59,575 -Excuse me, can you-- -Are you making overnight oats? 78 00:03:59,667 --> 00:04:00,997 No. What are overnight oats? 79 00:04:01,083 --> 00:04:02,633 My sister turned me on to them. 80 00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:03,749 If you're like me, 81 00:04:03,834 --> 00:04:05,384 a total wreck in the morning, 82 00:04:05,458 --> 00:04:07,168 it'll save your life. 83 00:04:07,250 --> 00:04:08,580 -Yeah? -Yeah. 84 00:04:08,667 --> 00:04:09,997 It's only like five ingredients. 85 00:04:10,083 --> 00:04:11,963 -Okay. -Rolled oats, almond milk, 86 00:04:12,041 --> 00:04:14,631 chia seed, peanut butter... 87 00:04:14,709 --> 00:04:16,079 Oh, shit. 88 00:04:16,166 --> 00:04:17,666 Chia seed, peanut butter, 89 00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:19,210 almond milk... maple syrup! 90 00:04:19,291 --> 00:04:20,791 And you need a mason jar. 91 00:04:20,875 --> 00:04:22,035 Do you have one? 92 00:04:22,125 --> 00:04:23,325 One with a really good top? 93 00:04:23,417 --> 00:04:25,207 -I think so. -[Helen] Excuse me. Could you 94 00:04:25,291 --> 00:04:27,291 please tell me where to find the Medjool dates? 95 00:04:28,375 --> 00:04:29,375 Oh. Sorry, sweetheart. 96 00:04:29,458 --> 00:04:30,458 What do you need? 97 00:04:32,583 --> 00:04:34,633 Medjool dates. 98 00:04:34,709 --> 00:04:35,959 I can't find them anywhere. 99 00:04:36,041 --> 00:04:38,131 Sure, sure. Aisle seven. 100 00:04:40,542 --> 00:04:42,582 [clerk] So, the key is to mix everything together-- 101 00:04:42,667 --> 00:04:45,287 And can you tell me where the pregnancy tests are, please? 102 00:04:46,583 --> 00:04:47,633 Aisle two. 103 00:04:55,750 --> 00:04:57,670 [sighs] 104 00:05:03,375 --> 00:05:05,285 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 105 00:05:05,375 --> 00:05:07,325 ♪ ♪ ♪ 106 00:05:11,750 --> 00:05:13,500 [sighs] 107 00:05:19,333 --> 00:05:21,423 ♪ I can never get enough... ♪ 108 00:05:21,500 --> 00:05:23,830 Mom, why are you taking so many pills? 109 00:05:23,917 --> 00:05:26,077 Um, they're vitamins, and they're for Vik. 110 00:05:26,166 --> 00:05:28,626 I thought, if I organized them, he might actually take them. 111 00:05:28,709 --> 00:05:29,879 Oh. 112 00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:32,169 They're cancer vitamins? 113 00:05:32,250 --> 00:05:34,170 ♪ As for me, I've got it all right here ♪ 114 00:05:34,250 --> 00:05:36,290 I love that song. Turn it up. 115 00:05:36,375 --> 00:05:38,125 ♪ You're all I need, I'm just a boy... ♪ 116 00:05:38,208 --> 00:05:39,878 Actually, why don't you turn it off? 117 00:05:39,959 --> 00:05:42,079 All right, you guys, come on. 118 00:05:42,166 --> 00:05:43,286 -Backpacks, lunches. -[music stops] 119 00:05:43,375 --> 00:05:44,825 Homework. Let's go. 120 00:05:46,000 --> 00:05:47,250 -Let's go. -Hold on. 121 00:05:47,333 --> 00:05:49,463 -No. Come on. -I'm going. 122 00:05:49,542 --> 00:05:52,212 -You're not going. -Yes, I am! 123 00:06:01,750 --> 00:06:03,130 Can I talk to you? 124 00:06:03,208 --> 00:06:04,378 What's up? 125 00:06:05,875 --> 00:06:08,165 I took a pregnancy test this morning. 126 00:06:09,250 --> 00:06:11,130 Why would you do that? 127 00:06:11,208 --> 00:06:12,958 Because I'm late. 128 00:06:13,041 --> 00:06:15,751 We were just at the doctor. You're not pregnant. 129 00:06:15,834 --> 00:06:18,384 Yeah, I... well, I know that now. I-- 130 00:06:18,458 --> 00:06:19,708 Didn't you hear anything that Dr. Roper said? 131 00:06:19,792 --> 00:06:21,382 Yeah. 132 00:06:21,458 --> 00:06:24,248 You're entering menopause, Helen. 133 00:06:24,333 --> 00:06:27,083 That's why your period is late. 134 00:06:27,166 --> 00:06:28,916 [sighs] 135 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,580 You know, things can happen. 136 00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:33,245 It's not impossible. 137 00:06:34,291 --> 00:06:36,581 Janet Jackson was older than me. 138 00:06:38,834 --> 00:06:40,254 Don't you think I'm too young to be in menopause? 139 00:06:41,917 --> 00:06:43,917 Don't you think I'm too young to die? 140 00:06:48,583 --> 00:06:49,633 Vik, wait. 141 00:06:49,709 --> 00:06:50,749 Kids, let's go! 142 00:06:53,625 --> 00:06:55,745 I'll make sure he takes them, Mom. 143 00:06:55,834 --> 00:06:57,334 Thanks, baby. 144 00:06:57,417 --> 00:06:58,957 Bye. 145 00:07:02,333 --> 00:07:04,253 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 146 00:07:04,333 --> 00:07:06,293 ♪ ♪ ♪ 147 00:07:31,542 --> 00:07:32,792 [gasps, chuckles] 148 00:07:32,875 --> 00:07:33,995 Helen. 149 00:07:34,083 --> 00:07:35,043 Oh, my God, you scared me. 150 00:07:35,125 --> 00:07:36,705 Hi. 151 00:07:36,792 --> 00:07:38,422 [panting] 152 00:07:38,500 --> 00:07:39,630 You want some? 153 00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:43,833 Yeah. Sure. 154 00:07:48,083 --> 00:07:50,293 I know you hate California. 155 00:07:50,375 --> 00:07:52,455 You have to admit, we have better weed. 156 00:07:52,542 --> 00:07:54,792 When did I say I hated California? 157 00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,495 I can just tell. 158 00:07:56,583 --> 00:07:59,173 You're one of those East Coast snobs 159 00:07:59,250 --> 00:08:02,670 who just loves to act like you're in exile out here. 160 00:08:04,917 --> 00:08:07,537 Oh, no. Where is that cookbook your mother wrote? 161 00:08:07,625 --> 00:08:08,995 It's in there. 162 00:08:09,083 --> 00:08:10,673 Yeah, but which one? 163 00:08:10,750 --> 00:08:13,130 See, the thing that you transplants don't understand 164 00:08:13,208 --> 00:08:16,708 is that California is actually the cradle of civilization. 165 00:08:16,792 --> 00:08:19,462 Uh, actually, I think that's somewhere in the Middle East. 166 00:08:19,542 --> 00:08:22,752 Yeah, if you're talking about patriarchal society. 167 00:08:22,834 --> 00:08:25,424 I'm talking about matriarchal society. 168 00:08:25,500 --> 00:08:27,630 And you think that started here? 169 00:08:27,709 --> 00:08:29,669 Not right here. 170 00:08:29,750 --> 00:08:31,920 About 150 miles east, in Joshua Tree. 171 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:33,750 Sierra? 172 00:08:33,834 --> 00:08:37,214 You know nothing you're saying is true, right? 173 00:08:40,125 --> 00:08:41,415 Such a cynic. 174 00:08:41,500 --> 00:08:43,040 [chuckles] 175 00:08:44,417 --> 00:08:45,627 I win. 176 00:08:45,709 --> 00:08:46,879 Oh, wait. 177 00:08:46,959 --> 00:08:48,459 No, I don't. 178 00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:49,832 You know, I wouldn't have figured you 179 00:08:49,917 --> 00:08:51,287 for a solitaire type of girl. 180 00:08:51,375 --> 00:08:54,035 My mom taught me when I was a kid 181 00:08:54,125 --> 00:08:57,035 so that I could keep myself entertained when she was on set. 182 00:08:57,125 --> 00:08:59,745 I didn't really have many friends my own age. 183 00:08:59,834 --> 00:09:01,544 That's why I'm such an old soul. 184 00:09:03,750 --> 00:09:05,380 No, you're not an old anything. 185 00:09:06,583 --> 00:09:09,043 Helen, I'm gonna be 30 next year. 186 00:09:09,125 --> 00:09:10,495 Wow. 187 00:09:10,583 --> 00:09:13,213 No, you don't understand. 188 00:09:13,291 --> 00:09:17,081 Thirty is almost, like, 50 in actor years. 189 00:09:17,166 --> 00:09:19,706 Well, I'm almost, like, 50 in people years. 190 00:09:19,792 --> 00:09:21,502 Yeah, but you're still really fuckable. 191 00:09:21,583 --> 00:09:23,333 I'm never gonna be that fuckable 192 00:09:23,417 --> 00:09:25,377 when I'm your age. 193 00:09:25,458 --> 00:09:27,378 What time is it? 194 00:09:27,458 --> 00:09:28,918 I don't know. 195 00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:30,500 Alexa, what time is it? 196 00:09:30,583 --> 00:09:32,543 [Alexa] The time is 11:04 a.m. 197 00:09:32,625 --> 00:09:35,125 Oh, shit. I gotta get an Uber. 198 00:09:35,208 --> 00:09:36,668 Where you going? 199 00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:38,210 To Joshua Tree. 200 00:09:38,291 --> 00:09:40,291 To my women's moon circle. 201 00:09:40,375 --> 00:09:41,705 I invited you, remember? 202 00:09:41,792 --> 00:09:43,172 You kind of spat in my face. 203 00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:45,882 Yeah, I'm sorry about that. 204 00:09:45,959 --> 00:09:47,419 It's fine. 205 00:09:47,500 --> 00:09:49,960 It's too bad, though. 206 00:09:50,041 --> 00:09:51,711 I mean, I just had this intuition 207 00:09:51,792 --> 00:09:54,132 that you really needed some guidance, but... 208 00:09:54,208 --> 00:09:56,208 [cell phone buzzes] 209 00:09:59,500 --> 00:10:00,790 [clicks tongue, sighs] 210 00:10:09,625 --> 00:10:11,625 What is a moon circle, exactly? 211 00:10:13,041 --> 00:10:14,921 New moons represent beginnings. 212 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:19,000 It's a time for planting seeds and setting intentions, 213 00:10:19,083 --> 00:10:23,003 and then committing to behaviors to help us manifest them. 214 00:10:23,083 --> 00:10:25,633 And I'm really looking forward to this one, 215 00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:27,039 because Gaelle is going to be there. 216 00:10:27,125 --> 00:10:28,375 Who's Gaelle? 217 00:10:28,458 --> 00:10:30,168 She's my guru. 218 00:10:30,250 --> 00:10:31,790 She's a healer. 219 00:10:31,875 --> 00:10:33,575 She's a true gift. 220 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,707 I mean, my work with her has been so transformative, 221 00:10:35,792 --> 00:10:37,172 I don't even see my therapist anymore. 222 00:10:42,417 --> 00:10:44,327 Fuck it. 223 00:10:46,333 --> 00:10:47,833 I'll go. 224 00:10:47,917 --> 00:10:50,827 -For real? -For real. 225 00:10:51,917 --> 00:10:53,127 Oh, my God. Awesome. 226 00:10:54,959 --> 00:10:58,039 [Sierra] You sure Vik won't mind us borrowing his car? 227 00:10:58,125 --> 00:11:01,825 Um, he might, but I don't particularly care at the moment. 228 00:11:03,625 --> 00:11:05,825 What kind of music do you like? 229 00:11:05,917 --> 00:11:08,627 Oh, I think probably nothing that you would like. 230 00:11:08,709 --> 00:11:10,459 Try me. 231 00:11:10,542 --> 00:11:12,252 Uh, I don't know. 232 00:11:12,333 --> 00:11:13,293 I like rock music. 233 00:11:13,375 --> 00:11:14,875 I like some folk music. 234 00:11:14,959 --> 00:11:15,959 Patti Smith? 235 00:11:16,041 --> 00:11:18,331 Uh, sure. 236 00:11:18,417 --> 00:11:21,077 She's my favorite when I'm super depressed. 237 00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:22,626 Probably listened to this album 238 00:11:22,709 --> 00:11:25,079 like 500 times in the past week. 239 00:11:25,166 --> 00:11:27,786 -Why were you super depressed? -Um... 240 00:11:27,875 --> 00:11:30,075 [Patti Smith's "Peaceable Kingdom" plays] 241 00:11:30,166 --> 00:11:33,416 I fucked a married man. 242 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:36,630 I'm really annoyed with myself 243 00:11:36,709 --> 00:11:40,039 because I've done it before, and it never ends well for me. 244 00:11:40,125 --> 00:11:42,415 I see. 245 00:11:42,500 --> 00:11:44,080 And I even know his wife, 246 00:11:44,166 --> 00:11:46,376 and I... 247 00:11:46,458 --> 00:11:49,498 I really like his wife, so... 248 00:11:49,583 --> 00:11:51,213 it was a stupid thing to do. 249 00:11:51,291 --> 00:11:53,081 Why did you do it? 250 00:11:53,166 --> 00:11:55,036 My mom broke up like two marriages, 251 00:11:55,125 --> 00:11:58,575 so I guess I just always thought that's how you vet a man, 252 00:11:58,667 --> 00:12:00,707 like how you know if he's stable or not. 253 00:12:00,792 --> 00:12:03,252 You mean, if he's married to someone else? 254 00:12:03,333 --> 00:12:04,463 Yeah, like, 255 00:12:04,542 --> 00:12:05,712 that's how you can tell 256 00:12:05,792 --> 00:12:06,962 if he's serious about commitment. 257 00:12:07,041 --> 00:12:09,131 That's what my mom always said. 258 00:12:09,208 --> 00:12:10,418 You're gonna think I'm full of it, 259 00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:12,830 but I wish I had your life. 260 00:12:13,917 --> 00:12:15,287 Oh. 261 00:12:15,375 --> 00:12:16,785 No, you don't. 262 00:12:16,875 --> 00:12:18,455 No, I'm serious. 263 00:12:18,542 --> 00:12:20,462 I would so much rather be you. 264 00:12:20,542 --> 00:12:23,042 I mean, look at my life. 265 00:12:23,125 --> 00:12:24,705 Yeah? 266 00:12:24,792 --> 00:12:27,292 Literally, the only currency that I have 267 00:12:27,375 --> 00:12:29,915 is my youth 268 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,630 or my sex or whatever. 269 00:12:34,125 --> 00:12:36,455 But you... 270 00:12:36,542 --> 00:12:38,502 you, like, have it all. 271 00:12:38,583 --> 00:12:40,793 -[Helen chuckles] -No, you're... 272 00:12:42,709 --> 00:12:45,579 You're, like, this smart, beautiful, 273 00:12:45,667 --> 00:12:47,167 sophisticated woman. 274 00:12:47,250 --> 00:12:48,540 You've made all the right choices. 275 00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:50,575 You have... 276 00:12:50,667 --> 00:12:51,627 I mean, you don't have men 277 00:12:51,709 --> 00:12:53,329 chewing you up and spitting you out. 278 00:12:53,417 --> 00:12:56,917 You have a family and Vik and... 279 00:12:57,000 --> 00:13:00,000 I mean, you have a whole world that needs you. 280 00:13:00,083 --> 00:13:03,333 Like, literally couldn't live without you. 281 00:13:03,417 --> 00:13:05,207 How do I get that? 282 00:13:09,041 --> 00:13:12,131 ♪ To build it back again ♪ 283 00:13:14,500 --> 00:13:18,830 ♪ Build the peaceable kingdom ♪ 284 00:13:20,709 --> 00:13:21,789 See? 285 00:13:21,875 --> 00:13:23,415 ♪ Back again ♪ 286 00:13:23,500 --> 00:13:25,130 Told you. 287 00:13:25,208 --> 00:13:26,288 Pretty great, right? 288 00:13:26,375 --> 00:13:29,075 ♪ Build it back again ♪ 289 00:13:29,166 --> 00:13:30,826 Come on. 290 00:13:33,250 --> 00:13:36,420 We're gonna miss the Blessing of the Eagle Feather. 291 00:13:38,792 --> 00:13:40,502 ♪ rhythmic, tribal music ♪ 292 00:13:40,583 --> 00:13:42,333 ♪ ♪ ♪ 293 00:13:42,417 --> 00:13:47,247 I want you all to take a big, deep breath. 294 00:13:47,333 --> 00:13:52,213 We've made it to the new moon in tropical Libra. 295 00:13:52,291 --> 00:13:54,171 We call upon this new moon, our cosmic mother... 296 00:13:54,250 --> 00:13:55,670 [whispers] That's Gaelle? 297 00:13:55,750 --> 00:13:56,540 Yeah. Isn't she wonderful? 298 00:13:56,625 --> 00:13:57,995 You said she was a guru. 299 00:13:58,083 --> 00:13:59,963 -[Sierra] She is. -[Gaelle] Join us... 300 00:14:00,041 --> 00:14:01,291 She's a teenager. 301 00:14:01,375 --> 00:14:02,415 Well, she was an Incan princess 302 00:14:02,500 --> 00:14:04,040 in a past life. 303 00:14:04,125 --> 00:14:06,035 [Gaelle] Help us uncover our first selves... 304 00:14:06,125 --> 00:14:09,245 I don't care if you don't believe me. It's true. 305 00:14:09,333 --> 00:14:11,463 [Gaelle] We call upon fire... 306 00:14:11,542 --> 00:14:14,042 [Helen] Is she even allowed to wear that thing? 307 00:14:14,125 --> 00:14:15,745 -What do you mean? -I mean, 308 00:14:15,834 --> 00:14:16,754 it's kind of politically incorrect. 309 00:14:16,834 --> 00:14:18,634 -Shh. -I mean, how many birds 310 00:14:18,709 --> 00:14:20,579 -had to die to make-- -Okay, Helen. Shh. 311 00:14:20,667 --> 00:14:24,627 Let its great power transmute our negative, 312 00:14:24,709 --> 00:14:26,579 lower energies. 313 00:14:26,667 --> 00:14:28,207 -[Helen coughing] -And help us 314 00:14:28,291 --> 00:14:29,961 move forward into positivity 315 00:14:30,041 --> 00:14:31,001 and light. 316 00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:35,077 [continues coughing] 317 00:14:35,166 --> 00:14:37,666 For people whose chakras are particularly blocked, 318 00:14:37,750 --> 00:14:39,710 the sage is very powerful. 319 00:14:39,792 --> 00:14:41,582 I'm allergic to sage. [sniffs] 320 00:14:41,667 --> 00:14:43,827 It's... [clears throat] 321 00:14:43,917 --> 00:14:46,287 It's Helen, right? 322 00:14:46,375 --> 00:14:48,035 -Mm-hmm. -You're lucky the universe 323 00:14:48,125 --> 00:14:50,705 chose to partner you with Sierra here. 324 00:14:50,792 --> 00:14:52,462 I've rarely met a sister 325 00:14:52,542 --> 00:14:55,002 whose sacral chakra is more aligned. 326 00:15:01,542 --> 00:15:03,672 [Helen coughs] 327 00:15:23,041 --> 00:15:24,501 [woman] Get a yurt! 328 00:15:24,583 --> 00:15:25,583 [light laughter] 329 00:15:32,542 --> 00:15:34,672 Thank you for holding space. 330 00:15:34,750 --> 00:15:38,420 Thank you for receiving light. 331 00:15:52,375 --> 00:15:54,325 [Sierra] Oh, my God, I hate 332 00:15:54,417 --> 00:15:56,417 having to wear clothes all the time. Don't you? 333 00:15:58,667 --> 00:16:01,077 That's what I love about being out here. 334 00:16:01,166 --> 00:16:02,786 There's not a man in sight. 335 00:16:02,875 --> 00:16:05,165 It's so liberating. 336 00:16:06,208 --> 00:16:07,498 -[Helen] Uh... -[Sierra sighs] 337 00:16:07,583 --> 00:16:09,173 So, what's the, um... 338 00:16:09,250 --> 00:16:10,960 What's on the, uh... 339 00:16:11,041 --> 00:16:13,131 What are we doing tonight? 340 00:16:13,208 --> 00:16:15,208 Well, I don't know exactly. 341 00:16:15,291 --> 00:16:17,961 Um, with Gaelle, anything could happen, 342 00:16:18,041 --> 00:16:21,001 but we usually have a banquet, 343 00:16:21,083 --> 00:16:22,543 and then we do the moon circle. 344 00:16:22,625 --> 00:16:23,625 Cool. 345 00:16:24,750 --> 00:16:27,500 Ooh. This... 346 00:16:27,583 --> 00:16:30,583 is for you to wear to dinner. 347 00:16:30,667 --> 00:16:33,077 Oh, uh, do I have to? 348 00:16:34,208 --> 00:16:35,958 Well, no, you don't have to, 349 00:16:36,041 --> 00:16:38,081 but I don't know how you expect to have 350 00:16:38,166 --> 00:16:39,786 a transformative experience 351 00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:41,915 if you don't at least try to participate. 352 00:16:42,041 --> 00:16:44,381 [gong crashing] 353 00:16:44,458 --> 00:16:45,628 What is that? 354 00:16:45,709 --> 00:16:47,579 That's the dinner gong. 355 00:16:47,667 --> 00:16:49,787 Gaelle loves that thing. 356 00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:51,955 So, um... 357 00:16:52,041 --> 00:16:55,961 what's up with the make-out sesh with you and Gaelle? 358 00:16:56,041 --> 00:16:58,541 Oh. Yeah, there's a little more 359 00:16:58,625 --> 00:17:00,745 to that story than I initially let on. 360 00:17:00,834 --> 00:17:02,134 Is she your girlfriend? 361 00:17:02,208 --> 00:17:05,998 No. No, I mean, she's not... not now. 362 00:17:06,083 --> 00:17:08,583 She was, briefly, for like a second. 363 00:17:08,667 --> 00:17:10,417 So you're bi? 364 00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:12,540 I don't like labels. 365 00:17:12,625 --> 00:17:14,375 Well, no, of course you don't. 366 00:17:17,083 --> 00:17:19,713 Um, I should call Vik and tell him 367 00:17:19,792 --> 00:17:21,382 I'm not going to be home. 368 00:17:21,458 --> 00:17:23,168 How is Vik? 369 00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:25,080 He's fine. 370 00:17:25,166 --> 00:17:26,786 I just... I-I saw him the other day, 371 00:17:26,875 --> 00:17:28,375 and he seemed a little tired. 372 00:17:28,458 --> 00:17:29,828 Well, he has a huge job, so... 373 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:32,880 Hi. It's me. 374 00:17:32,959 --> 00:17:35,209 I'm just calling to say that I'm not coming home. 375 00:17:35,291 --> 00:17:38,831 Um, and the kids are with Noah, so you're on your own. 376 00:17:38,917 --> 00:17:42,377 Uh, there's some of your mom's baingan bharta in the freezer. 377 00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:44,748 Okay. Bye. 378 00:17:44,834 --> 00:17:46,964 [gong crashes] 379 00:17:47,041 --> 00:17:48,541 Are you really not gonna wear that? 380 00:17:48,625 --> 00:17:50,245 Because you're gonna be the only one. 381 00:17:51,834 --> 00:17:53,294 Okay, fine. 382 00:17:53,375 --> 00:17:54,325 [short chuckle] 383 00:18:02,291 --> 00:18:05,831 So... what about you? 384 00:18:05,917 --> 00:18:08,957 Um, what about me? 385 00:18:09,041 --> 00:18:10,581 Do you only sleep with men? 386 00:18:10,667 --> 00:18:12,957 Um, mostly. 387 00:18:14,208 --> 00:18:16,248 Um, say more. 388 00:18:17,583 --> 00:18:19,463 [gong crashes] 389 00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:24,754 [Sierra] I forgot to tell you about the pièce de résistance. 390 00:18:24,834 --> 00:18:27,424 Later tonight, we're going to a sensory deprivation tank. 391 00:18:27,500 --> 00:18:28,790 [Helen] A what? 392 00:18:28,875 --> 00:18:29,915 Seriously, you don't know 393 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:31,750 what a sensory deprivation tank is? 394 00:18:31,834 --> 00:18:33,044 -Should I? -Oh, my God. 395 00:18:33,125 --> 00:18:34,535 Helen, you're gonna love it. 396 00:18:34,625 --> 00:18:36,875 The water is warmed to your exact body temperature, 397 00:18:36,959 --> 00:18:39,499 and it's like this big womb, 398 00:18:39,583 --> 00:18:41,883 and you just kind of float in this mystical cocoon, 399 00:18:41,959 --> 00:18:43,829 and it's, like, totally transformative. 400 00:18:43,917 --> 00:18:45,997 You use that word a lot. 401 00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:48,963 Yeah, I'm just noticing that, too. 402 00:18:49,041 --> 00:18:51,381 [Gaelle] Okay, ladies, hand over your fears 403 00:18:51,458 --> 00:18:52,828 that you wrote down. 404 00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:55,245 [Gaelle clears throat] 405 00:18:55,333 --> 00:18:57,633 Okay. 406 00:18:57,709 --> 00:18:59,999 Okay, do I have a card from everybody? 407 00:19:05,875 --> 00:19:10,325 Now, the first step in validating our narratives 408 00:19:10,417 --> 00:19:13,577 is owning what scares us. 409 00:19:13,667 --> 00:19:17,127 As you all know, a new moon is an ideal time 410 00:19:17,208 --> 00:19:19,788 for clearing psychic debris that has accumulated 411 00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:22,455 over the previous lunation. 412 00:19:22,542 --> 00:19:25,632 You have all trusted your current blockages 413 00:19:25,709 --> 00:19:26,919 to this sisterhood. 414 00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,920 Now, together, we will 415 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,380 dissolve them with love. 416 00:19:32,417 --> 00:19:33,537 Okay. 417 00:19:35,875 --> 00:19:37,495 [clears throat] 418 00:19:37,583 --> 00:19:38,923 [laughs] 419 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:40,750 -I'm sorry. -Read it! 420 00:19:40,834 --> 00:19:42,334 -[laughter] -What does it say? 421 00:19:42,417 --> 00:19:44,537 -Read it. -Okay, okay. 422 00:19:44,625 --> 00:19:47,205 "My boyfriend asked me to try anal with him last week." 423 00:19:47,291 --> 00:19:48,831 -[laughter] -And then there's a frowny face 424 00:19:48,917 --> 00:19:52,037 with X's for eyes. 425 00:19:52,125 --> 00:19:54,285 Ladies, suggestions? 426 00:19:56,041 --> 00:19:57,211 [throats clearing] 427 00:19:57,291 --> 00:19:58,291 Butt plugs. 428 00:19:58,375 --> 00:20:00,245 The glass kind. 429 00:20:00,333 --> 00:20:01,833 They're tiny. They're not offensive. 430 00:20:01,917 --> 00:20:03,787 I mean, at first, I was like, "Absolutely not. 431 00:20:03,875 --> 00:20:05,285 No way. Not happening." 432 00:20:05,375 --> 00:20:07,785 But they are a gateway drug to anal. 433 00:20:07,875 --> 00:20:10,165 What if I don't want a gateway drug to anal? 434 00:20:10,250 --> 00:20:11,580 Oh, you do. 435 00:20:11,667 --> 00:20:13,207 You should listen to the lady. 436 00:20:13,291 --> 00:20:14,751 [laughter] 437 00:20:14,834 --> 00:20:16,294 [Gaelle] Okay. 438 00:20:16,375 --> 00:20:17,785 [Gaelle clears throat] 439 00:20:17,875 --> 00:20:20,205 Next, let's see. 440 00:20:20,291 --> 00:20:21,881 "I am afraid having children 441 00:20:21,959 --> 00:20:24,789 is going to steal my creative spirit. 442 00:20:24,875 --> 00:20:27,165 I still have so much I want to accomplish. 443 00:20:27,250 --> 00:20:28,830 What if I wake up an old woman 444 00:20:28,917 --> 00:20:31,247 and realize I gave up all my energy 445 00:20:31,333 --> 00:20:33,043 to my children?" 446 00:20:33,125 --> 00:20:35,625 Fuck. 447 00:20:35,709 --> 00:20:37,829 That... 448 00:20:37,917 --> 00:20:39,497 Anyone? 449 00:20:41,500 --> 00:20:42,710 Okay. 450 00:20:42,792 --> 00:20:44,792 Guys, clearly that's mine. 451 00:20:44,875 --> 00:20:46,875 Um... 452 00:20:46,959 --> 00:20:49,749 I'm, like, freaking out. 453 00:20:49,834 --> 00:20:52,004 Like, seriously, like, I don't even know... 454 00:20:52,083 --> 00:20:53,963 I'm not prepared for this. 455 00:20:54,041 --> 00:20:56,131 Like, what if this ruins my life? 456 00:20:56,208 --> 00:20:59,708 [crying] Like, I really fucking like my life, you know? 457 00:21:01,542 --> 00:21:03,082 [Gaelle] The answer already exists 458 00:21:03,166 --> 00:21:04,536 in you, Cass. 459 00:21:07,291 --> 00:21:10,251 It will come if you let yourself surrender. 460 00:21:10,333 --> 00:21:12,463 I am surrendering. 461 00:21:13,792 --> 00:21:15,172 Surrender more. 462 00:21:15,250 --> 00:21:17,000 [Cass] Okay, Gaelle, 463 00:21:17,083 --> 00:21:19,673 with all due respect, you have never been pregnant, 464 00:21:19,750 --> 00:21:22,250 and you have no fucking clue what this feels like. 465 00:21:22,333 --> 00:21:24,083 -Calm down, Cass! -Guys, don't fight. 466 00:21:24,166 --> 00:21:25,286 I know what it feels like. 467 00:21:26,959 --> 00:21:28,829 I have four kids. 468 00:21:28,917 --> 00:21:30,207 -Whoa. -Geez. 469 00:21:30,291 --> 00:21:31,751 [laughter] 470 00:21:31,834 --> 00:21:33,634 And I do... I remember being terrified 471 00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,329 before my first daughter was born. 472 00:21:35,417 --> 00:21:37,327 My husband said I was acting like a caged animal. 473 00:21:37,417 --> 00:21:40,417 Yes, that's exactly how I feel. 474 00:21:42,917 --> 00:21:44,627 What do you do? 475 00:21:44,709 --> 00:21:46,959 I'm a designer. I make furniture. 476 00:21:47,041 --> 00:21:49,881 Ah. I love design. 477 00:21:49,959 --> 00:21:51,709 I used to have a shop. 478 00:21:51,792 --> 00:21:53,002 Where? 479 00:21:53,083 --> 00:21:54,753 In Brooklyn. 480 00:21:56,417 --> 00:21:59,037 -It was a great shop. -Mmm. 481 00:21:59,125 --> 00:22:01,495 But, you know, um, I can say this. 482 00:22:01,583 --> 00:22:04,673 Your life is about to completely change. 483 00:22:04,750 --> 00:22:05,670 -Fuck. -No, but not 484 00:22:05,750 --> 00:22:06,710 in the way you think. 485 00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:08,882 It-it doesn't get smaller. 486 00:22:08,959 --> 00:22:11,169 It gets larger. 487 00:22:11,250 --> 00:22:13,290 [Cass] How? 488 00:22:13,375 --> 00:22:17,575 Okay, when... right after I had my first daughter, Whitney, 489 00:22:17,667 --> 00:22:20,827 I had this moment, and I remember it very clearly. 490 00:22:20,917 --> 00:22:22,207 I was looking 491 00:22:22,291 --> 00:22:24,331 at her little face, and, um, 492 00:22:24,417 --> 00:22:27,877 it suddenly occurred to me that she was going to... 493 00:22:27,959 --> 00:22:30,129 outlive me. 494 00:22:30,208 --> 00:22:32,458 Her life was going to extend beyond mine, 495 00:22:32,542 --> 00:22:35,582 and I was finite. 496 00:22:35,667 --> 00:22:38,787 You know, really just dust in the fucking wind. 497 00:22:38,875 --> 00:22:41,705 And so... 498 00:22:41,792 --> 00:22:44,672 I just said to myself, "Okay, then, if that's true, 499 00:22:44,750 --> 00:22:48,420 what am I going to do with my one 500 00:22:48,500 --> 00:22:50,500 wild and precious life?" 501 00:22:52,208 --> 00:22:53,498 Mary Oliver. 502 00:22:55,792 --> 00:22:58,332 You guys don't know Mary Oliver? 503 00:22:58,417 --> 00:22:59,957 Okay, but what was the answer? 504 00:23:00,041 --> 00:23:01,381 Like, what did you do? 505 00:23:01,458 --> 00:23:02,958 Well, I had more children. 506 00:23:03,041 --> 00:23:04,381 -Oh, that's nice. -[laughter] 507 00:23:04,458 --> 00:23:05,918 But I love being a mother. 508 00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:07,290 And not everybody does, and that's okay. 509 00:23:07,375 --> 00:23:08,955 I mean, you don't have to give 510 00:23:09,041 --> 00:23:10,671 everything over to this little person. 511 00:23:10,750 --> 00:23:12,920 You just have to make some room for her. Or him. 512 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:13,880 It's a girl. 513 00:23:17,417 --> 00:23:19,127 The heart actually does expand. 514 00:23:19,208 --> 00:23:21,918 I-I have no idea how it does it, 515 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,250 but it seems to always be able to make room for children. 516 00:23:26,500 --> 00:23:28,710 Helen... 517 00:23:28,792 --> 00:23:32,172 I'm passing my guru baton to you this evening. 518 00:23:32,250 --> 00:23:33,710 -Oh, please don't. -[laughter] 519 00:23:33,792 --> 00:23:34,962 I... 520 00:23:35,041 --> 00:23:37,001 I have to. 521 00:23:37,083 --> 00:23:38,883 Tonight belongs to you. 522 00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:40,460 [applause] 523 00:23:45,500 --> 00:23:46,580 What happens if my husband loves a baby 524 00:23:46,667 --> 00:23:48,577 -more than he loves me? -Well, he won't. 525 00:23:48,667 --> 00:23:50,207 And my boyfriend wants to get pregnant. 526 00:23:50,291 --> 00:23:52,501 I'm not so sure about him, 527 00:23:52,583 --> 00:23:54,753 but I want to really have a kid, so should I just do it? 528 00:23:54,834 --> 00:23:55,834 -No. -[others] No. 529 00:23:55,917 --> 00:23:57,247 Don't do that. 530 00:23:57,333 --> 00:23:59,213 Like, what if I don't find a man in time? 531 00:23:59,291 --> 00:24:00,961 Should I just do it alone? 532 00:24:01,041 --> 00:24:02,961 You can, but it's very hard. 533 00:24:03,041 --> 00:24:05,001 But, I mean, that's why you guys have each other, right? 534 00:24:05,083 --> 00:24:06,423 Why you have this group? 535 00:24:07,667 --> 00:24:09,577 Look, I want to be honest with you. 536 00:24:09,667 --> 00:24:11,787 No matter how many new moons 537 00:24:11,875 --> 00:24:14,665 or tropical Libras you circle under, 538 00:24:14,750 --> 00:24:17,080 the only way out of this thing is through it. 539 00:24:17,166 --> 00:24:21,536 I mean, and you can talk to astrologers or gurus or shamans, 540 00:24:21,625 --> 00:24:23,535 but the only thing that really works 541 00:24:23,625 --> 00:24:25,785 is living and making choices and making mistakes, 542 00:24:25,875 --> 00:24:27,205 and then eventually, 543 00:24:27,291 --> 00:24:29,711 you get old enough... 544 00:24:29,792 --> 00:24:32,172 and you start to figure shit out. 545 00:24:37,375 --> 00:24:40,785 I thought we were going to a sensory derivation bank. 546 00:24:40,875 --> 00:24:43,825 A sensory deprivation tank? 547 00:24:46,667 --> 00:24:48,207 What did I say? 548 00:24:48,291 --> 00:24:51,171 I think maybe we should take that away from you. 549 00:24:51,250 --> 00:24:52,580 Actually, be careful, 550 00:24:52,667 --> 00:24:54,577 'cause sometimes Gaelle's stuff is laced. 551 00:24:58,000 --> 00:24:59,500 Oh, well. 552 00:25:02,500 --> 00:25:05,250 [takes a deep breath] 553 00:25:05,333 --> 00:25:09,963 So, what was your fear that you wrote on the card? 554 00:25:10,041 --> 00:25:14,291 Um, I couldn't think of one. 555 00:25:16,750 --> 00:25:18,790 Your life is so perfect that you don't have any fears? 556 00:25:18,875 --> 00:25:20,325 [laughs] 557 00:25:20,417 --> 00:25:22,627 My life is a total fucking wreck. 558 00:25:28,500 --> 00:25:31,040 I thought I was pregnant this morning. 559 00:25:31,125 --> 00:25:32,915 Oh, my God. Are you? 560 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:35,250 No. I'm in menopause. 561 00:25:35,333 --> 00:25:36,883 Oh. 562 00:25:38,166 --> 00:25:39,746 That's a bummer. 563 00:25:39,834 --> 00:25:40,794 Is it? 564 00:25:42,291 --> 00:25:44,131 I don't know. Is it? 565 00:25:44,208 --> 00:25:46,248 I mean, do you want more kids? 566 00:25:46,333 --> 00:25:47,753 You know... 567 00:25:49,291 --> 00:25:51,211 I have four children. 568 00:25:53,000 --> 00:25:55,290 I don't actually want another baby. 569 00:25:55,375 --> 00:25:58,575 I just... you know, but Vik wanted it. 570 00:25:58,667 --> 00:26:03,377 And I thought that I should give that to him. 571 00:26:03,458 --> 00:26:06,038 But this whole day, I've been thinking about it, 572 00:26:06,125 --> 00:26:09,575 and I've been wondering, how many of my children 573 00:26:09,667 --> 00:26:11,417 did I want? 574 00:26:13,291 --> 00:26:18,001 Was it for me, or was it for Noah? 575 00:26:18,083 --> 00:26:19,003 Who's Noah? 576 00:26:19,083 --> 00:26:20,833 My first husband. 577 00:26:22,542 --> 00:26:24,422 I mean, all my life, 578 00:26:24,500 --> 00:26:26,330 I've been feeling... I don't know how to say this. 579 00:26:26,417 --> 00:26:28,497 I've been feeling needed. 580 00:26:28,583 --> 00:26:31,423 By men, by my children. 581 00:26:31,500 --> 00:26:34,040 You know, I remember when Noah and I first got together, 582 00:26:34,125 --> 00:26:36,495 his mother had just died, and-and-and... 583 00:26:36,583 --> 00:26:38,833 I remember how much he wanted me, 584 00:26:38,917 --> 00:26:42,827 in this kind of really desperate sort of way. 585 00:26:42,917 --> 00:26:44,707 And he would just, like, climb into bed with me 586 00:26:44,792 --> 00:26:46,422 and need to fuck me, 587 00:26:46,500 --> 00:26:49,750 to feel, um, connected 588 00:26:49,834 --> 00:26:52,294 or, uh, safe 589 00:26:52,375 --> 00:26:54,285 or cared for. 590 00:26:54,375 --> 00:26:56,035 I don't know, and I-I was... 591 00:26:56,125 --> 00:27:00,285 I was happy to give that to him when I was young, 592 00:27:00,375 --> 00:27:02,785 because I thought that that's what I was supposed to do. 593 00:27:07,667 --> 00:27:11,577 And then my children came along, and they're just all need. 594 00:27:11,667 --> 00:27:13,627 You know, they're like little, tiny, 595 00:27:13,709 --> 00:27:17,459 little, walking balls of need. 596 00:27:17,542 --> 00:27:21,922 And men... men don't understand. 597 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:25,000 I mean, they have this notion of... 598 00:27:25,083 --> 00:27:28,673 of-of what bringing a child into their lives would mean, 599 00:27:28,750 --> 00:27:32,210 but... but-but they only do a fraction of the work, 600 00:27:32,291 --> 00:27:35,711 and the rest is, like, up to us. 601 00:27:35,792 --> 00:27:39,172 I think I'm... 602 00:27:39,250 --> 00:27:42,420 I think I'm relieved to finally be in menopause, 603 00:27:42,500 --> 00:27:45,330 because I will never... 604 00:27:45,417 --> 00:27:48,247 have to make a decision like that again. 605 00:27:48,333 --> 00:27:52,213 You mean whether or not to give a man what he wants? 606 00:27:55,959 --> 00:27:57,879 Yes. 607 00:28:01,291 --> 00:28:03,041 Yeah. Fuck. 608 00:28:03,125 --> 00:28:04,285 Yeah. 609 00:28:04,375 --> 00:28:06,325 I think maybe that's it. 610 00:28:07,917 --> 00:28:09,537 [chuckles] 611 00:28:11,291 --> 00:28:12,831 You know why... 612 00:28:12,917 --> 00:28:15,497 You know why I like having sex with women? 613 00:28:15,583 --> 00:28:18,083 No. Why? 614 00:28:18,166 --> 00:28:22,286 Because I find that sex with women is just... 615 00:28:22,375 --> 00:28:24,455 so much more intimate. 616 00:28:24,542 --> 00:28:26,292 You know? 617 00:28:26,375 --> 00:28:28,495 Because I can relate to their struggles, 618 00:28:28,583 --> 00:28:29,963 because they're my struggles. 619 00:28:31,542 --> 00:28:35,582 And so, when I see a woman there naked 620 00:28:35,667 --> 00:28:40,327 and confident and hungry for orgasm, 621 00:28:40,417 --> 00:28:43,207 it's like this primal admiration. 622 00:28:45,333 --> 00:28:47,003 It's very sexy. 623 00:28:48,333 --> 00:28:50,583 And also, 624 00:28:50,667 --> 00:28:53,287 usually with women... [clears throat] 625 00:28:53,375 --> 00:28:56,915 I feel like I have a lot more control. 626 00:28:59,083 --> 00:29:00,923 And, um... 627 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:03,920 I don't know, control is really hot. 628 00:29:08,375 --> 00:29:11,915 ♪ "Peaceable Kingdom" by Patti Smith ♪ 629 00:29:22,083 --> 00:29:27,003 ♪ Yesterday I saw you standing there ♪ 630 00:29:27,083 --> 00:29:31,293 ♪ With your hand against the pane ♪ 631 00:29:33,375 --> 00:29:37,785 ♪ Looking out the window ♪ 632 00:29:39,500 --> 00:29:41,830 ♪ At the rain ♪ 633 00:29:41,917 --> 00:29:44,957 [both moaning softly] 634 00:29:45,041 --> 00:29:49,791 ♪ Maybe one day we'll be strong enough ♪ 635 00:29:51,000 --> 00:29:55,960 ♪ To build it back again ♪ 636 00:29:56,041 --> 00:30:01,001 ♪ Build the peaceable kingdom ♪ 637 00:30:02,333 --> 00:30:07,083 ♪ Build it back again ♪ 638 00:30:14,291 --> 00:30:16,791 [both chuckle] 639 00:30:18,458 --> 00:30:20,668 Listen, can I give you some advice? 640 00:30:21,750 --> 00:30:24,040 Yeah, okay. 641 00:30:24,125 --> 00:30:26,745 Um... 642 00:30:26,834 --> 00:30:29,384 lay off the married guys. 643 00:30:29,458 --> 00:30:31,128 Yeah, I know. 644 00:30:31,208 --> 00:30:32,998 You don't, really, because you're not married. 645 00:30:33,083 --> 00:30:34,383 You've never been married, so you couldn't know. 646 00:30:34,458 --> 00:30:36,458 And that's okay, but... 647 00:30:37,834 --> 00:30:40,254 When you sleep with a married man, 648 00:30:40,333 --> 00:30:43,633 it's not just him. 649 00:30:43,709 --> 00:30:46,129 There's a whole constellation of people behind him, 650 00:30:46,208 --> 00:30:47,918 and it takes... 651 00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:49,920 years to build trust in a marriage. 652 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,460 And when you sleep with someone's husband, 653 00:30:52,542 --> 00:30:53,832 it's not just a moment. 654 00:30:53,917 --> 00:30:56,247 It's years of his life, and hers, 655 00:30:56,333 --> 00:30:59,543 and the promise they made to each other and-and their kids, 656 00:30:59,625 --> 00:31:01,705 and it's everything. 657 00:31:01,792 --> 00:31:03,882 And you're just shitting all over it. 658 00:31:06,291 --> 00:31:07,881 Fuck. 659 00:31:12,500 --> 00:31:14,710 [dance music playing] 660 00:31:14,792 --> 00:31:16,542 [indistinct, festive chatter] 661 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:20,420 The deprivation tank is here? 662 00:31:20,500 --> 00:31:22,080 Yeah. 663 00:31:26,458 --> 00:31:29,878 I want to have four kids one day, too. 664 00:31:29,959 --> 00:31:31,919 ♪ ♪ ♪ 665 00:32:02,542 --> 00:32:04,422 ♪ ♪ ♪ 666 00:32:32,583 --> 00:32:34,293 -Hey. -No. 667 00:32:35,750 --> 00:32:37,420 Sorry. 668 00:32:45,375 --> 00:32:46,955 Hey, Helen. 669 00:32:47,041 --> 00:32:48,001 There you are. 670 00:32:48,083 --> 00:32:49,423 Oh, my God, I found it. 671 00:32:49,500 --> 00:32:50,500 I found the tank. 672 00:32:50,583 --> 00:32:52,173 Come on. Let's go. 673 00:33:06,375 --> 00:33:08,325 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 674 00:33:08,417 --> 00:33:10,167 ♪ ♪ ♪ 675 00:33:32,041 --> 00:33:34,041 ♪ ♪ ♪ 676 00:33:50,291 --> 00:33:51,381 [spits] 677 00:33:54,834 --> 00:33:55,884 [taps lid] 678 00:34:02,667 --> 00:34:05,077 [beating lid] 679 00:34:10,667 --> 00:34:12,667 [gasping] 680 00:34:15,250 --> 00:34:16,080 [gasps] 681 00:34:21,542 --> 00:34:23,382 [Sierra] Helen. 682 00:34:23,458 --> 00:34:24,628 Helen, wait. 683 00:34:24,709 --> 00:34:26,829 Where are you going? 684 00:34:26,917 --> 00:34:28,827 ♪ tense, atmospheric music ♪ 685 00:34:28,917 --> 00:34:31,247 ♪ ♪ ♪ 686 00:34:45,667 --> 00:34:48,127 Helen. 687 00:34:48,208 --> 00:34:49,668 What are you doing here? I-I thought you were 688 00:34:49,750 --> 00:34:51,080 in the desert tonight. 689 00:34:56,083 --> 00:34:57,583 What's wrong? 690 00:34:57,667 --> 00:34:58,787 Come here. 691 00:35:02,500 --> 00:35:03,670 What is it? 692 00:35:03,750 --> 00:35:05,540 I don't want you to die. 693 00:35:08,959 --> 00:35:10,749 I don't want to die, either. 694 00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:16,960 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 695 00:35:17,041 --> 00:35:19,081 ♪ ♪ ♪ 696 00:35:24,709 --> 00:35:27,209 [crying] 697 00:35:31,709 --> 00:35:33,539 Don't die. 698 00:35:33,625 --> 00:35:35,495 Please don't die. 699 00:35:39,041 --> 00:35:40,581 -I won't. -Promise me. 700 00:35:40,667 --> 00:35:41,627 I promise. 701 00:35:45,542 --> 00:35:47,252 I promise. 702 00:36:13,625 --> 00:36:15,825 [shuddering breaths] 703 00:36:35,125 --> 00:36:36,955 -[Noah] Trevor, straighten up. -[Trevor] I am. 704 00:36:37,041 --> 00:36:38,331 -[tires squealing] -[Noah] No, you're not! 705 00:36:38,417 --> 00:36:39,707 [Trevor] Well, I'm trying. 706 00:36:39,792 --> 00:36:40,922 [Noah] Holy shit, stop! 707 00:36:41,000 --> 00:36:42,210 Brake! Brake! 708 00:36:43,792 --> 00:36:45,882 [both panting] 709 00:36:45,959 --> 00:36:47,709 This sucks. 710 00:36:49,417 --> 00:36:51,377 Come on. I thought you'd enjoy this. 711 00:36:51,458 --> 00:36:52,458 Why? 712 00:36:52,542 --> 00:36:53,752 Well, your first driving lesson. 713 00:36:53,834 --> 00:36:54,834 I don't know. 714 00:36:54,917 --> 00:36:56,377 This isn't my first. 715 00:36:56,458 --> 00:36:58,208 Vik lets me back Mom's car 716 00:36:58,291 --> 00:36:59,581 out of the driveway sometimes. 717 00:36:59,667 --> 00:37:01,457 Yeah, I know, but, you know, 718 00:37:01,542 --> 00:37:03,712 here you're learning how to steer and park and... 719 00:37:03,792 --> 00:37:05,582 Whatever. 720 00:37:05,667 --> 00:37:07,417 [sighs] 721 00:37:07,500 --> 00:37:10,500 Okay, buddy, why don't you try reversing out? 722 00:37:10,583 --> 00:37:11,713 Are you giving up? 723 00:37:11,792 --> 00:37:13,542 This is pointless. 724 00:37:13,625 --> 00:37:15,955 I can't even take driver's ed until next year. 725 00:37:16,041 --> 00:37:18,001 Vik and I were gonna start lessons next summer. 726 00:37:38,667 --> 00:37:39,957 Hey, Trev. 727 00:37:41,750 --> 00:37:44,830 Listen, I-I wanted to talk to you about something. 728 00:37:44,917 --> 00:37:46,207 Your friend, Brooklyn... 729 00:37:46,291 --> 00:37:47,421 What about him? 730 00:37:47,500 --> 00:37:49,790 Well, I just wanted you to know 731 00:37:49,875 --> 00:37:53,455 that if there's... if there's anything you wanted to... 732 00:37:53,542 --> 00:37:55,132 tell me about him or... 733 00:37:56,500 --> 00:37:58,540 -Anything at all. -[Trevor sighs] 734 00:37:58,625 --> 00:38:01,665 Can we just get Stacey and go back to Mom's now? 735 00:38:01,750 --> 00:38:03,290 Please. 736 00:38:05,333 --> 00:38:06,383 Of course. 737 00:38:06,458 --> 00:38:08,248 [engine starts] 738 00:38:08,333 --> 00:38:10,253 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 739 00:38:10,333 --> 00:38:12,293 ♪ ♪ ♪ 740 00:38:16,208 --> 00:38:17,958 [Trevor] You better not be heading for the Switch. 741 00:38:18,041 --> 00:38:19,501 [Stacey] It's my day! 742 00:38:19,583 --> 00:38:21,583 [Vik] Helen! What did you do with my razor? 743 00:38:21,667 --> 00:38:22,877 -[kids running] -[Helen] Hey, knock it off. 744 00:38:22,959 --> 00:38:24,249 What? 745 00:38:24,333 --> 00:38:26,883 [Vik] Razor! It doesn't have a blade. 746 00:38:26,959 --> 00:38:29,579 Well, I threw it away. It was dull. Oh, hi. 747 00:38:29,667 --> 00:38:31,377 [Vik] It was only dull because you shaved your legs with it! 748 00:38:31,458 --> 00:38:34,828 There's more of them in the top, right-hand drawer. 749 00:38:34,917 --> 00:38:37,247 How was the lesson? 750 00:38:37,333 --> 00:38:39,753 -Can I talk to you? -Yeah, sure. 751 00:38:39,834 --> 00:38:42,134 [Trevor] You'd lose your mind if I went into your room! 752 00:38:42,208 --> 00:38:43,708 [Stacey] I didn't go into your room! 753 00:38:43,792 --> 00:38:46,542 I swear to God, if you guys don't stop... 754 00:38:46,625 --> 00:38:47,825 You and Vik need to work with me. 755 00:38:47,917 --> 00:38:49,497 -Work with you? -I am trying 756 00:38:49,583 --> 00:38:51,333 so hard. 757 00:38:51,417 --> 00:38:52,827 I've upended my life 758 00:38:52,917 --> 00:38:54,377 to follow you here for Vik's work, 759 00:38:54,458 --> 00:38:56,248 -to be near my kids. -Yeah, me too. 760 00:38:56,333 --> 00:38:57,583 And you guys won't meet me halfway. 761 00:38:57,667 --> 00:38:59,577 I don't... What? 762 00:38:59,667 --> 00:39:01,377 This is supposed to be a partnership, Helen. 763 00:39:01,458 --> 00:39:03,288 We are co-parenting, and right now, 764 00:39:03,375 --> 00:39:05,415 I am the only one extending myself. 765 00:39:05,500 --> 00:39:09,460 You won't encourage the kids to call back. 766 00:39:09,542 --> 00:39:11,462 You roll over my visitation. 767 00:39:11,542 --> 00:39:14,382 Vik is incredibly competitive with the kids. 768 00:39:14,458 --> 00:39:17,538 I mean, for fuck's sake, Helen, they are my children. 769 00:39:17,625 --> 00:39:19,415 Not his. 770 00:39:19,500 --> 00:39:21,710 You just need to tell him to back the fuck up. 771 00:39:21,792 --> 00:39:23,172 He's dying. 772 00:39:27,208 --> 00:39:29,878 Vik has cancer, 773 00:39:29,959 --> 00:39:33,499 and he's going to die soon, so... 774 00:39:35,333 --> 00:39:36,753 ...maybe you'll forgive us 775 00:39:36,834 --> 00:39:38,674 if we aren't at our best right now. 776 00:39:41,250 --> 00:39:42,830 What kind of cancer? 777 00:39:42,917 --> 00:39:45,377 Does it matter? 778 00:39:46,458 --> 00:39:47,748 The kids know? 779 00:39:52,083 --> 00:39:53,833 Oh, God. 780 00:39:55,291 --> 00:39:57,631 You should have told me. 781 00:39:57,709 --> 00:39:59,629 Why would I have told you? 782 00:39:59,709 --> 00:40:00,879 Because we're friends. 783 00:40:00,959 --> 00:40:02,749 No, we're not. 784 00:40:06,417 --> 00:40:08,207 Jesus, Helen, I... 785 00:40:08,291 --> 00:40:09,671 I'm so sorry. 786 00:40:11,583 --> 00:40:12,923 Look, i-if there's anything you need, 787 00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:14,130 anything I can do... 788 00:40:14,208 --> 00:40:15,418 I-I can take the kids. 789 00:40:15,500 --> 00:40:17,250 You and Vik can have some time. 790 00:40:18,583 --> 00:40:20,633 Oh, God, Helen, I... 791 00:40:23,208 --> 00:40:24,538 Sorry. I can also... 792 00:40:24,625 --> 00:40:26,205 I can just give you guys some space. 793 00:40:26,291 --> 00:40:28,081 That would be great. 794 00:40:29,875 --> 00:40:31,745 Sure. 795 00:40:31,834 --> 00:40:33,464 Thank you. 796 00:40:53,041 --> 00:40:54,131 [Anton] Hey. 797 00:40:54,208 --> 00:40:55,708 What the fuck? 798 00:40:55,792 --> 00:40:58,002 Sorry. Your-your door was open. 799 00:40:58,083 --> 00:40:59,963 Did I scare you? 800 00:41:01,667 --> 00:41:03,497 [sighs] No. 801 00:41:04,500 --> 00:41:05,960 It's the hoodie, right? 802 00:41:06,041 --> 00:41:07,421 The hoodie makes me seem threatening. 803 00:41:07,500 --> 00:41:08,500 Better? 804 00:41:08,583 --> 00:41:09,833 That's not funny. 805 00:41:09,917 --> 00:41:11,497 Yeah, it is. 806 00:41:19,125 --> 00:41:22,285 Well, now that you've made yourself at home... 807 00:41:22,375 --> 00:41:24,325 want to tell me why you're here? 808 00:41:25,709 --> 00:41:27,579 How do you even know where I live? 809 00:41:27,667 --> 00:41:29,997 Read through my mom's personnel files. 810 00:41:30,083 --> 00:41:31,673 I've seen all your pay stubs. 811 00:41:33,959 --> 00:41:36,629 Well, then you should have known not to eat all my prosciutto. 812 00:41:36,709 --> 00:41:39,289 I'm playing. I-I White-Paged you, actually. 813 00:41:39,375 --> 00:41:41,205 It's that easy, huh? 814 00:41:41,291 --> 00:41:42,631 That's disturbing. 815 00:41:42,709 --> 00:41:44,789 Yeah, I think you can get it blocked. 816 00:41:49,166 --> 00:41:51,166 I need your thoughts. 817 00:41:52,208 --> 00:41:54,288 Okay. What about? 818 00:41:54,375 --> 00:41:56,035 On whether or not I should join the Marines. 819 00:41:56,125 --> 00:41:58,035 What? 820 00:41:58,125 --> 00:41:59,745 What about college? 821 00:41:59,834 --> 00:42:01,834 I need to be my own man, Mr. Solloway. 822 00:42:01,917 --> 00:42:03,287 I-I can't keep letting my parents 823 00:42:03,375 --> 00:42:04,915 push me around like this. 824 00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:06,880 It's not right. 825 00:42:06,959 --> 00:42:09,169 Look, I know you and my mom 826 00:42:09,250 --> 00:42:10,540 have something going on right now. 827 00:42:12,792 --> 00:42:14,082 She can be a real bully. 828 00:42:14,166 --> 00:42:15,376 You should know that. 829 00:42:15,458 --> 00:42:17,708 Yeah, I do know that, Anton. 830 00:42:19,750 --> 00:42:22,790 I also know that she loves you like a crazy person, 831 00:42:22,875 --> 00:42:25,125 and right now she's having a hard time letting you go. 832 00:42:25,208 --> 00:42:26,748 And that's normal. That's not her. 833 00:42:26,834 --> 00:42:28,384 That's just what happens when the time comes 834 00:42:28,458 --> 00:42:30,958 for kids to flee the nest. 835 00:42:31,041 --> 00:42:33,581 You'd really rather go to war than go to college? 836 00:42:33,667 --> 00:42:36,377 Well, they said the chances of me seeing combat are slim. 837 00:42:36,458 --> 00:42:37,538 Yeah, they're lying. 838 00:42:37,625 --> 00:42:38,955 This country is pretty much 839 00:42:39,041 --> 00:42:42,251 at war somewhere all the time. 840 00:42:42,333 --> 00:42:45,083 Well, any way I go, 841 00:42:45,166 --> 00:42:47,666 one of them is going to be disappointed. 842 00:42:50,458 --> 00:42:52,918 Look, you came here. You want my advice, right? 843 00:42:56,166 --> 00:42:58,076 I really think you need to see Princeton. 844 00:42:58,166 --> 00:42:59,746 Just see it. Just... 845 00:42:59,834 --> 00:43:01,714 spend some time there. 846 00:43:01,792 --> 00:43:04,082 You have this idea in your head that it's a terrible place. 847 00:43:04,166 --> 00:43:06,126 Maybe it is, but maybe you'd like it. 848 00:43:06,208 --> 00:43:07,708 Well, how am I supposed to pull that off? 849 00:43:07,792 --> 00:43:09,172 It's all the way across the country. 850 00:43:09,250 --> 00:43:10,420 Your mom will take you there. 851 00:43:10,500 --> 00:43:11,670 No, she won't. 852 00:43:11,750 --> 00:43:13,540 -How do you know? -I just do. 853 00:43:13,625 --> 00:43:14,745 Have you asked her? 854 00:43:18,709 --> 00:43:20,539 How did you get here? You drive? 855 00:43:20,625 --> 00:43:22,125 No, I Ubered. I never get to drive. 856 00:43:22,208 --> 00:43:23,708 I don't have a fucking car. 857 00:43:23,792 --> 00:43:25,542 Okay. Let's go. 858 00:43:25,625 --> 00:43:26,535 Where are we going? 859 00:43:26,625 --> 00:43:27,785 To talk to your mom. 860 00:43:27,875 --> 00:43:29,165 No. I just got here. 861 00:43:29,250 --> 00:43:30,500 She'll kill me if she finds out 862 00:43:30,583 --> 00:43:32,043 -I came to you. -Come on. 863 00:43:32,125 --> 00:43:33,495 I'll let you drive. 864 00:43:33,583 --> 00:43:34,963 Down the PCH. 865 00:43:50,834 --> 00:43:55,044 [Janelle] Why can't you rebel like a normal kid? 866 00:43:55,125 --> 00:43:57,455 Go to Europe for a year. Date a white girl. 867 00:43:57,542 --> 00:44:00,042 You really want to fuck with me and your dad? 868 00:44:00,125 --> 00:44:02,325 Do the Peace Corps in some awful third-world place. 869 00:44:02,417 --> 00:44:04,667 Don't join the fucking Army. 870 00:44:04,750 --> 00:44:07,670 -Marines. -Boy, I will kill you. 871 00:44:07,750 --> 00:44:09,460 Look, if I go to the Marines, I won't be a victim. 872 00:44:09,542 --> 00:44:10,792 What are you talking about? 873 00:44:10,875 --> 00:44:12,785 How is shooting other brown people 874 00:44:12,875 --> 00:44:15,205 gonna give you agency? Hear yourself. 875 00:44:15,291 --> 00:44:16,671 No, hear yourself. 876 00:44:16,750 --> 00:44:19,000 It is always about race and agency with you. 877 00:44:19,083 --> 00:44:20,673 What nine-year-old has 878 00:44:20,750 --> 00:44:22,210 a Black Revolutionary-themed birthday party? 879 00:44:22,291 --> 00:44:24,251 Fucking Marcus Garvey on the chocolate cake? 880 00:44:24,333 --> 00:44:25,673 Malcolm X napkins? 881 00:44:25,750 --> 00:44:27,710 -Like, who does that? -They make those? 882 00:44:27,792 --> 00:44:30,422 Yes. This is what I've had to deal with my whole life. 883 00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:32,210 -To protect you. -Look, if I have a target 884 00:44:32,291 --> 00:44:33,831 on my back, why shouldn't I sign up? 885 00:44:33,917 --> 00:44:35,327 At least then I'll have a gun. 886 00:44:37,834 --> 00:44:39,794 -What are you doing here? -Your mother called. 887 00:44:39,875 --> 00:44:42,205 She didn't know where you went. 888 00:44:42,291 --> 00:44:44,041 You can't disappear without telling her where you're going. 889 00:44:44,125 --> 00:44:45,705 You know that. She worries. 890 00:44:45,792 --> 00:44:47,632 Why? I'm 19 years old. 891 00:44:47,709 --> 00:44:48,709 Tell him. 892 00:44:48,792 --> 00:44:50,132 Go on. 893 00:44:50,208 --> 00:44:51,458 You're such an adult. Tell him. 894 00:44:51,542 --> 00:44:52,882 Tell him what you did. 895 00:44:54,417 --> 00:44:56,247 I talked to a recruiter about joining the Marines. 896 00:44:56,333 --> 00:44:57,503 You did what? 897 00:44:57,583 --> 00:44:58,963 [clears throat] Uh... 898 00:44:59,041 --> 00:45:00,291 Hi. 899 00:45:00,375 --> 00:45:02,415 Does this motherfucker live here now? 900 00:45:02,500 --> 00:45:04,380 Look, I-I know it's not my place-- 901 00:45:04,458 --> 00:45:05,998 Oh, you're damn right. 902 00:45:06,083 --> 00:45:07,463 But your kid came to my house 903 00:45:07,542 --> 00:45:09,292 looking for help, so... 904 00:45:09,375 --> 00:45:11,415 I thought maybe we could all just talk about it. 905 00:45:11,500 --> 00:45:13,290 Who the fuck does your boyfriend think he is? 906 00:45:13,375 --> 00:45:14,745 He's not my boyfriend. 907 00:45:14,834 --> 00:45:16,674 Reason he wants to join the Marines 908 00:45:16,750 --> 00:45:18,250 is because he can't make a decision 909 00:45:18,333 --> 00:45:20,133 about this Princeton thing 910 00:45:20,208 --> 00:45:23,498 because he is terrified of hurting one of you. 911 00:45:23,583 --> 00:45:25,753 So, what I suggested was that 912 00:45:25,834 --> 00:45:27,924 somebody should just take him there. 913 00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:29,880 Let him see the school, see if he likes it, 914 00:45:29,959 --> 00:45:31,129 make his own decision. 915 00:45:31,208 --> 00:45:32,458 Sounds reasonable to me. 916 00:45:32,542 --> 00:45:33,462 If I go, it'd have to be 917 00:45:33,542 --> 00:45:35,252 -this week. -Why? 918 00:45:35,333 --> 00:45:37,753 Because I scheduled to take the GED next Monday. 919 00:45:39,375 --> 00:45:41,325 Anton... in order to take the GED, 920 00:45:41,417 --> 00:45:42,917 you have to drop out of high school. 921 00:45:43,000 --> 00:45:45,670 I can't join the Marines without it. 922 00:45:45,750 --> 00:45:47,460 -Oh, no. -You have school this week. 923 00:45:47,542 --> 00:45:49,672 Hell no. You're not joining the fucking military. 924 00:45:49,750 --> 00:45:51,170 Look, I can miss a couple classes. 925 00:45:51,250 --> 00:45:52,880 I already took these fucking classes anyway. 926 00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:54,540 Boy, don't talk like that to your mother. 927 00:45:54,625 --> 00:45:55,785 Why is it, whenever you're mad at me, 928 00:45:55,875 --> 00:45:57,075 you act like you're still her man? 929 00:45:57,166 --> 00:45:58,166 -You want to live? -Oh, Jesus. 930 00:45:58,250 --> 00:46:00,380 Not another word. 931 00:46:00,458 --> 00:46:01,788 Look, Carl, my friend-- 932 00:46:01,875 --> 00:46:03,785 Man, why are you all up in my family? 933 00:46:03,875 --> 00:46:05,205 You don't have your own? 934 00:46:05,291 --> 00:46:07,131 Yeah, I do. 935 00:46:07,208 --> 00:46:08,538 Then what the fuck you doing here? 936 00:46:09,750 --> 00:46:12,170 Anton, go to your room. 937 00:46:12,250 --> 00:46:13,710 Carl, go home. 938 00:46:13,792 --> 00:46:15,882 Let's... let's just sleep on this, okay? 939 00:46:15,959 --> 00:46:17,709 We don't have to make any decisions tonight. 940 00:46:17,792 --> 00:46:19,132 We don't have to do anything. 941 00:46:19,208 --> 00:46:21,208 -It's my decision. -Okay. 942 00:46:21,291 --> 00:46:23,171 [sighs] If you want to go to the school, 943 00:46:23,250 --> 00:46:25,710 I'll take you this week. I promise. 944 00:46:25,792 --> 00:46:26,712 Janelle, what about the board meeting? 945 00:46:26,792 --> 00:46:28,292 This is more important. 946 00:46:28,375 --> 00:46:29,495 [Carl] Janelle, hold up. 947 00:46:29,583 --> 00:46:30,923 We talked about sending him 948 00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:33,000 to a state school-- public education. 949 00:46:33,083 --> 00:46:34,253 We agreed on that 950 00:46:34,333 --> 00:46:36,173 when he was a baby. 951 00:46:36,250 --> 00:46:38,380 -Things have changed, Carl. -No, you've changed. 952 00:46:38,458 --> 00:46:40,378 -Dad, what if I want to go? -Anton, just be quiet. 953 00:46:40,458 --> 00:46:41,748 Just because you couldn't make it there 954 00:46:41,834 --> 00:46:42,834 doesn't mean I can't. 955 00:46:42,917 --> 00:46:43,827 [Janelle] Carl! 956 00:46:43,917 --> 00:46:45,167 Hey. 957 00:46:45,250 --> 00:46:47,080 [both panting] 958 00:46:47,166 --> 00:46:49,246 You gonna hit me? 959 00:46:49,333 --> 00:46:51,083 Hit me. 960 00:46:51,166 --> 00:46:52,786 Go ahead. 961 00:46:54,875 --> 00:46:55,995 Carl. 962 00:47:02,208 --> 00:47:04,828 So you a man now. 963 00:47:05,917 --> 00:47:07,787 Okay, be a man. 964 00:47:11,041 --> 00:47:13,421 Go see what it's like. 965 00:47:16,333 --> 00:47:18,043 [door opens] 966 00:47:19,083 --> 00:47:19,883 [door closes] 967 00:47:24,041 --> 00:47:25,961 ♪ quiet, atmospheric music ♪ 968 00:47:26,041 --> 00:47:28,041 ♪ ♪ ♪ 969 00:47:36,458 --> 00:47:38,458 [line rings] 970 00:47:38,542 --> 00:47:40,422 Hi. It's Whitney. Leave a message. 971 00:47:40,500 --> 00:47:42,500 -[phone beeps] -Hey, Whit, it's Dad. 972 00:47:42,583 --> 00:47:44,253 Uh, it's super late where you are. 973 00:47:44,333 --> 00:47:45,833 You're probably asleep, but I just, uh... 974 00:47:45,917 --> 00:47:47,787 I was just calling to say hi. 975 00:47:47,875 --> 00:47:51,075 Mom keeps me informed about most things, but, um... 976 00:47:51,166 --> 00:47:53,416 good to hear from you once in a while. 977 00:47:53,500 --> 00:47:55,540 It's been a while. 978 00:47:55,625 --> 00:47:57,205 Okay. Love you. 979 00:47:57,291 --> 00:47:58,791 Call me if you can. 980 00:47:58,875 --> 00:48:00,745 If you feel like it. Bye. 981 00:48:14,750 --> 00:48:16,750 [knocking at door] 982 00:48:28,083 --> 00:48:30,753 -Hey. -Hey. 983 00:48:33,041 --> 00:48:34,381 Can I come in? 984 00:48:34,458 --> 00:48:36,078 Of course. 985 00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:42,130 It's nice. 986 00:48:42,208 --> 00:48:43,708 Thanks. 987 00:48:43,792 --> 00:48:45,212 You renting? 988 00:48:45,291 --> 00:48:46,671 Yeah. 989 00:48:46,750 --> 00:48:47,880 Thank God. 990 00:48:47,959 --> 00:48:49,959 How did you find me? 991 00:48:50,041 --> 00:48:53,131 Um, I made Anton tell me where you live. 992 00:48:53,208 --> 00:48:54,828 What, and you drove all the way up here 993 00:48:54,917 --> 00:48:56,247 in the middle of the night? 994 00:48:56,333 --> 00:48:58,883 You didn't call or text or...? 995 00:48:58,959 --> 00:49:00,419 Should I go? 996 00:49:00,500 --> 00:49:02,130 No, no, please, no. 997 00:49:02,208 --> 00:49:04,168 Sit down. 998 00:49:04,250 --> 00:49:07,250 Can I get you anything? I... I've got whiskey. 999 00:49:07,333 --> 00:49:10,503 You can, but let me just say something first. 1000 00:49:10,583 --> 00:49:11,753 [sighs] 1001 00:49:11,834 --> 00:49:14,634 Thank you for what you did. 1002 00:49:14,709 --> 00:49:16,419 I didn't do anything. 1003 00:49:16,500 --> 00:49:17,920 No, you did. 1004 00:49:18,000 --> 00:49:19,630 You stood up for my son. 1005 00:49:19,709 --> 00:49:21,629 That was crazy earlier. 1006 00:49:21,709 --> 00:49:24,079 Well, we've all been there. 1007 00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:28,960 We've been, uh... 1008 00:49:29,041 --> 00:49:31,291 divorced for so long, 1009 00:49:31,375 --> 00:49:33,915 you'd think we'd be over it by now, 1010 00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:36,380 figured out a way to forgive each other, 1011 00:49:36,458 --> 00:49:38,458 find some peace. 1012 00:49:38,542 --> 00:49:40,672 But somehow... 1013 00:49:42,417 --> 00:49:44,077 They say time heals all wounds, 1014 00:49:44,166 --> 00:49:45,326 but sometimes it doesn't. 1015 00:49:47,166 --> 00:49:48,786 No, it doesn't. 1016 00:49:48,875 --> 00:49:50,825 It just makes things worse. 1017 00:49:52,583 --> 00:49:54,463 Anyway, I just... 1018 00:49:56,917 --> 00:49:59,377 Of course he should have seen the damn school. 1019 00:49:59,458 --> 00:50:01,168 I should have taken him. 1020 00:50:03,375 --> 00:50:05,125 I'm gonna take him this week. 1021 00:50:06,458 --> 00:50:07,918 What about the board meeting? 1022 00:50:08,000 --> 00:50:09,750 What about it? 1023 00:50:09,834 --> 00:50:12,004 If they fire me, they fire me. 1024 00:50:12,083 --> 00:50:14,543 [chuckles] 1025 00:50:14,625 --> 00:50:16,535 Look, what if I take him? 1026 00:50:18,250 --> 00:50:19,580 You? 1027 00:50:19,667 --> 00:50:21,377 I'm the neutral party. 1028 00:50:21,458 --> 00:50:23,788 I can take him there, introduce him to my friend. 1029 00:50:23,875 --> 00:50:25,455 He can observe a class. 1030 00:50:25,542 --> 00:50:27,832 Then we come back, and he can make his decision. 1031 00:50:27,917 --> 00:50:30,037 You'd do that? 1032 00:50:30,125 --> 00:50:31,745 I'd be happy to do it. 1033 00:50:31,834 --> 00:50:33,464 If it's okay with you. 1034 00:50:33,542 --> 00:50:35,672 And Carl, of course. 1035 00:50:35,750 --> 00:50:37,250 If it's a choice between this 1036 00:50:37,333 --> 00:50:39,133 and the goddamn Marines, who knows? 1037 00:50:39,208 --> 00:50:41,168 Maybe he would. 1038 00:50:41,250 --> 00:50:42,710 He should go. 1039 00:50:49,959 --> 00:50:51,669 Why are you doing this, Noah? 1040 00:50:53,709 --> 00:50:56,249 You really think my son is that brilliant? 1041 00:50:58,667 --> 00:51:00,877 Yeah, I do. 1042 00:51:00,959 --> 00:51:03,079 But I'm not doing it for him. 1043 00:51:04,542 --> 00:51:06,422 ♪ quiet, ambient music ♪ 1044 00:51:06,500 --> 00:51:08,250 ♪ ♪ ♪ 1045 00:51:18,417 --> 00:51:20,077 Mmm. 1046 00:51:22,250 --> 00:51:24,250 [panting] 1047 00:51:34,542 --> 00:51:36,462 [grunting] 1048 00:51:45,667 --> 00:51:47,207 [chuckling] 1049 00:51:47,291 --> 00:51:48,751 Does it turn you on 1050 00:51:48,834 --> 00:51:50,464 -that I'm your boss? -Oh, Jesus. 1051 00:51:50,542 --> 00:51:52,292 -Janelle, shut the fuck up. -[Janelle chuckling] 1052 00:51:56,083 --> 00:51:58,293 [moaning] 1053 00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:11,500 Oh, my. Oh, my. 1054 00:52:11,583 --> 00:52:13,753 [chuckling] Oh, my God. 1055 00:52:13,834 --> 00:52:15,584 [panting] 1056 00:52:15,667 --> 00:52:17,127 Oh, my. 1057 00:52:18,166 --> 00:52:20,166 [chuckling] 1058 00:52:23,625 --> 00:52:25,745 [both panting] 1059 00:52:26,834 --> 00:52:28,674 Oh, fuck. 1060 00:52:39,458 --> 00:52:40,998 Excuse me. Can you tell me 1061 00:52:41,083 --> 00:52:42,963 what the connecting gate to New York is? 1062 00:52:43,041 --> 00:52:44,291 We don't have that information. 1063 00:52:44,375 --> 00:52:46,035 You'll have to check in on the ground. 1064 00:52:46,125 --> 00:52:47,665 Okay, thanks. 1065 00:52:48,834 --> 00:52:50,294 Hey. 1066 00:52:50,375 --> 00:52:52,165 Because we were delayed taking off, 1067 00:52:52,250 --> 00:52:54,170 we're gonna have to book it when we hit the ground 1068 00:52:54,250 --> 00:52:55,330 to make our connection, okay? 1069 00:52:55,417 --> 00:52:56,537 Should've got a direct flight. 1070 00:52:58,250 --> 00:52:59,580 Yeah, well, your mother booked this yesterday. 1071 00:52:59,667 --> 00:53:01,627 We were lucky to get any flight at all. 1072 00:53:02,875 --> 00:53:04,375 Did you talk to your dad? 1073 00:53:05,709 --> 00:53:07,379 He won't call me back. 1074 00:53:12,792 --> 00:53:14,502 You're listening to my book? 1075 00:53:14,583 --> 00:53:15,713 Yeah. 1076 00:53:15,792 --> 00:53:17,752 It's pretty good, actually. 1077 00:53:17,834 --> 00:53:19,544 Thanks. 1078 00:53:21,458 --> 00:53:23,878 [indistinct chatter] 1079 00:53:23,959 --> 00:53:26,079 What? 1080 00:53:26,166 --> 00:53:27,536 That's weird. 1081 00:53:29,834 --> 00:53:31,044 Yo. 1082 00:53:35,583 --> 00:53:37,423 Hi. 1083 00:53:37,500 --> 00:53:40,330 Uh, we missed our connecting flight to New York, so... 1084 00:53:40,417 --> 00:53:41,577 Uh, no. 1085 00:53:41,667 --> 00:53:43,667 "No"? 1086 00:53:43,750 --> 00:53:45,500 No, we have no more flights to New York today. 1087 00:53:46,875 --> 00:53:48,415 What about the shuttle? 1088 00:53:48,500 --> 00:53:50,250 They're all booked. [sighs] 1089 00:53:50,333 --> 00:53:52,753 We've had delays all day because of the wind. 1090 00:53:52,834 --> 00:53:53,794 What about standby? 1091 00:53:53,875 --> 00:53:55,705 Good luck with standby. 1092 00:53:55,792 --> 00:53:57,792 Come on, is there anything you can do to help? 1093 00:53:57,875 --> 00:54:01,575 Well, let me see if I can switch you to... 1094 00:54:01,667 --> 00:54:02,747 Ah. 1095 00:54:02,834 --> 00:54:05,044 Tomorrow night, 8:23. 1096 00:54:05,125 --> 00:54:06,705 No, we have to get to New York tonight. 1097 00:54:06,792 --> 00:54:08,422 Then rent a car. 1098 00:54:16,250 --> 00:54:18,130 They're gonna run out of cars. 1099 00:54:18,208 --> 00:54:20,458 [cell phone ringing] 1100 00:54:23,625 --> 00:54:25,285 Cole? 1101 00:54:28,542 --> 00:54:30,292 Wait. 1102 00:54:31,875 --> 00:54:33,165 Wait. Cole, slow down. 1103 00:54:33,250 --> 00:54:35,210 What do you mean? 1104 00:54:35,291 --> 00:54:37,251 [Anton] So, who's coming to get us? 1105 00:54:37,333 --> 00:54:38,963 [Noah] An old friend. 1106 00:54:40,041 --> 00:54:41,831 [horn honks] 1107 00:54:41,917 --> 00:54:44,627 ♪ tense, atmospheric music ♪ 1108 00:54:44,709 --> 00:54:47,289 ♪ ♪ ♪ 1109 00:54:51,834 --> 00:54:54,634 [announcer over P.A.] Welcome to O'Hare International Airport. 1110 00:54:54,709 --> 00:54:56,329 Loading zones for rideshare services 1111 00:54:56,417 --> 00:54:58,127 are located on the upper level 1112 00:54:58,208 --> 00:55:00,498 of terminals one, three and four. 1113 00:55:14,083 --> 00:55:17,043 I'm sure she's fine. 1114 00:55:17,125 --> 00:55:19,415 That makes one of us. 1115 00:55:28,333 --> 00:55:30,003 ♪ rhythmic, atmospheric music ♪ 1116 00:55:30,083 --> 00:55:32,083 ♪ ♪ ♪ 71683

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