All language subtitles for The Goldbergs s07e20_English

ADULT ADAM: Growing up,
my dad made
all sorts of sounds.

There was the grunt...
(GRUNTS)

...the grumble...
(GRUMBLES)

...the mumble...
(MUMBLES)

...the "Ah!"...
Ah!

...and, of course,
the "Bup, bup, bup!"

Bup, bup, bup!
(GROANS)

But it was his groan
that really told the story.
Oh!

Ah.
It was the sound
he made before,

during, and after work.

It was clear to anyone
within earshot
he didn't enjoy his job.

Allow me to translate.

Toast?
(GROANS)

This groan meant,
"Every day's the same."

Have a good day, honey.
(GROANS)

And this one meant,
"Not gonna happen."

He does not have
the wind at his back.

I hope I never
have to work for real.

But my dad did,
at his furniture store,

the Ottoman Empire, every day
for the last 20 years.
(GROANS)

Good morning,
sunshine.

I bought you a Boston cream,
extra cream.

(GROANS)
Meaning,
"I've already had four."

And after a long day of
sitting, selling furniture,

and hanging with Vic,
it was closing time.

Have a blessed
evening, Mur.

(GROANS)

That one was
just a groan.

Yep, for my dad,
work wasn't the best.

At least he joyfully returned
home to his family.

Home.
Nobody bother me.

We're all on the same page,
sweetie, so go relax.

The TV's all yours.
Damn right.

And the final groan could
only mean one thing...

(GROANS)
"At least I have you, TV."

* I'm twisted up inside

* But nonetheless,
I feel the need to say

* I don't know the future

* But the past keeps getting
clearer every day *

ADULT ADAM:
It was April 15th,
1980-something

and, for us drama kids,

the pinnacle of
our otherwise boring year.

This year's spring musical
will be...

Nothing.

So, then,
an actual play?

Finally, a gritty role
I can sink my teeth into.

Like maybe
a working-class galoot

who came back from the war

with one less finger
and a head full of horrors.

His name is Jimbo,
but people call him Tree.

Again, no one's
calling this guy anything,

because it's not a play.
We're doing nothing.

But the cast wrap party
is historically

where Schernecke
shines romantically.

Get your pity smooches
elsewhere, Matt Schernecke.

We're doing bupkis because
the licensing fees went up.

Balls! The musical
is the one time
where theater geeks

get light-to-moderate fame
in this school.

Football players
would nod at me.

I was a shape
they recognized.

A cheerleader said,
"Oh, it's you,"
right to my face.

Like we shared
the same world!

What are we gonna do?

Nothing, unless anybody
has any fully fledged material

lying in a drawer at home.

I got some stuff
in a drawer at home

that makes me
fully fledged.

Out!
Way ahead of ya.

Actually,
I have a musical.
Do tell.

It's called
The Playground,

and it's a meditation
on what it means to play.

Adam made me read it.

It's about a flower
who wants to get planted

on the other side
of a playground.

It's okay.

Okay?

It might be the best thing
a 12-year-old's ever written.

It just needs a finale.

Sounds amateurish
and unfinished,
but it's all we got.

I'm humbled to share
my creative vision with you.

Relax, Tennessee Williams.

Just shove it
in your backpack tonight.

I had no idea
you had a musical
in you.

Yep. The Playground
is an originally penned piece

by me and Erica.

Your older sister
who left for college

and barely acknowledges
your existence?

The very one.

And the minute
I tell her we're putting
this production on,

she's gonna be psyched
to dive back in.

God, no!

But it's a chance
to see our work
up there in lights!

You have a marquee?

There's a bulletin board
with pins. It's the same.

I had fun writing
that with you
like five years ago,

but I'm busy with my studies
and my boyfriend

and not wanting
to do it at all.

Yoo-hoo.
Geoffy's home.

Oh, my, a guest?

Erica, you didn't say
anything about company.

I'm so sorry. This is not
how it normally looks.

Geoff, stop. You do not
have to clean up for him.

He was just leaving.

So soon? A-At least
stay for a beverage.

We have Tab
and sink water.

You've tempted me.

I'm gonna park myself
right here
and make a night of it.

No! I have things to do.

Like finish a musical
with your baby brother?

Wow. You guys are a regular
Rodgers and Hammerstein,

except you're siblings
and children and...

Hey, look, a whole song
about slides!

It's called
The Playground,

and it's set in
a playground.
It makes you think.

It almost does.

A duet about monkey bars?
I can't wait.

Well, you're gonna have to,
because it's not happening.

Unless you take my hand
and come with me

to complete
our theatrical destiny.

Ohh! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Stop by anytime.
You're always welcome
in our home.

No, he's not.

And stop offering
my Tabs to people.

While my sister
was kicking me out,

my dad was kicking back
at the office,

until this guy moseyed in...

Formica Mike,
the Formica King,

my dad's local
furniture-shop rival.

He was gaudy, tacky,
and my dad
couldn't stand him.

Hello, Murray Goldberg.

What do you want?
It's not what I want.

It's what I'm offering...
An invitation to break bread.

I'll break a stale loaf
over your head.

Vic, come on.

I'm sorry,
but I will not fall victim

to this man's
shenanigans.

Have you seen
his commercials?

I can't trust a man
who dresses like
a mattress.

Oh, you saw my spots?

Listen,
does it look weird

when that couple's
lying on top of me?

No. Narratively,
it worked fine.

I'm responding
to the costume.

What are we
talking about here?

We're talking about
you, me, and our wives
having dinner together.

What do you say?

I say I've never wanted
to do anything less.

Then I don't have
any choice but to purchase
these two chairs.

Our sitting chairs?

Fine.

If it makes this end,
I'll have dinner with you,
but I'm eating quick.

Is there any other way?

We're going
to Le Bec-Fin.

It's French.

Holy moly!

It's also considered
the best restaurant
in America.

Dick Cavett ate there.

Well, so are we,
this Saturday night.

Tell your wife.

She'll have heard of it.

I doubt it.

Le Bec (BLEEP) Fin?

Ohh!

What are you
so excited about?

I thought you hated
Formica Mike and
his Formica wife.

I do.
They're snooty garbage

that rub their obscene wealth
in our faces.

But Le Bec-Fin? Oh!

They pour you that little bit
of wine for you to taste,

and you taste it and you go,
"Mmm," but you don't know.

Aren't you
at least curious

as to why these people
want to take us out to dinner?

Nope.

Le Bec-Fin! Oh!

I'm gonna buy
a new dress, hat,

and over-the-elbow
opera gloves!

Opera gloves? What's wrong
with these sink gloves?

Damn it, Murray!
Le Bec-Fin!

(SIGHS)

I wish my mom
were alive so I could
show her I'd made it.

(GRUMBLING)

ADULT ADAM:
As my dad was grumbling
about dinner companions,

I was looking for
a new musical partner.

So, what are we
doing, again?

Erica ditched me,
and I gotta finish
a rousing musical

that ties six storylines
together

and makes
the audience weep
by tomorrow.

Here's what
I got so far.

(CATCHY MELODY PLAYS)

Are those
the opening bars

to You Can Call Me Al
by Paul Simon?

Gah! I knew
it sounded familiar!

What's this play
about, again?

Well, in this scene,
Phil the Flower

learns his friends are
the real soil in his life.

Maybe this
will do the trick.

(ARPEGGIO PLAYS)

Can you make it sound
more like a full orchestra?

I can kind of make
a shimmer sound.

Balls! Why would Erica
screw me like this?

A handful of drama kids
are counting on me.

I'll do it.
No one's asking you.

And what could you possibly
bring to the table?

Oh, I bring everything
to the table...

Chairs, place mats,
napkin rings,

decorative centerpieces,
candles, my elbows.

Stop naming things
that go on a table!

I need music and lyrics.

Done and done.

I'll write you
the greatest rap
known to man,

and you can waste it
on your lazy high school play.

Pass!

I don't need you
showing up out of nowhere,

sucking on a treat,

and insinuating yourself
into my life!

You'll be back.
They all come back.

Except for all the ones
who never come back.

You did the right thing.

Your brother is no friend
to music.

Plus, there's nothing
Erica would hate more

than if I let him
ruin our musical.

Hold on!

Don't say "Hold on."
Nothing good ever happens

when people in your family
say "Hold on"!

If I let Barry
ruin our musical,

Erica will have to step in
and fix it.

That's a huge leap, and it
will most certainly backfire.

Not a chance, Dave Kim.

You can go. And please take
your piano guts with you.

Do you know how long
it took to get this thing
down the stairs?

You're not a good friend!

(ARPEGGIOS PLAYING)

You're in!

Yes!
What are my parameters?

None. Go wild.

Buck wild?
What's the difference?

You know what?
Surprise me.

Good decision.
You just became
a millionaire.

I don't see how,
but sure.

While I enlisted Barry's help,

my mom and dad reported
for dinner with
the King and Queen.

Le Bec-Fin!

I can't believe
we're here!

(CHUCKLES)
And in the back room?

Nothing but VIP, baby.
My Franny demands it.

That's enough
out of you, Mikey.

Although I do love
the privacy.

Who wants to sit
with other people?

If you want to
be more alone,

I can make
that happen.

Oh, Murray, stop it.

Le Bec-Fin!

That was gibberish
the first 50 times
you said it.

Is this place too good
for a basket of bread?

No, but they do have
this divine Melba toast.

Toast?

I put on pants to
eat the one thing
I could make at home?

You know what?
I'm with the
big guy here.

Give me a hot cross bun,
plate of salty butter.

That's living.

Say, Fran,
I can't help but admire

your beautiful necklace
and earrings.

Are those emeralds?

Rarer.
Green diamonds.

See, I got this guy
in the diamond district,

a disgusting monster.

I'll hook you up.

Yep, nothing but the best
from my Mikey.

You should see
our Margate house.

You have a house
down the shore?

Four houses in
from the boardwalk.

Did you hear that, Murray?
Four houses in!

And I got a lead
on a house two in
from the boardwalk.

(BEVERLY GASPS)

Meaning ours
could be available soon.

Wink, wink.

She's winking at me.

We own a shore house now.

How did you get that from
her having crap in her eye?

Oh, we're gonna spend
every summer

with our ungrateful children
and then their children.

We are gonna anchor
our family

to the beautiful brown
and gray shores
of New Jersey.

That's how it works
with our crappy kids.

Pure crap,
but we love 'em.

Thanks for getting my wife
all worked up,

but I've already
got one house
I can't afford.

Well, maybe I can
help you with that.

Murray, I would very much like
to buy your furniture store.

(GASPS)
You serious?

As serious
as my heart issues.

Sometimes it beats fast,
sometimes slow,

sometimes not at all.

I can't believe
we're gonna have
a shore house!

And there's gonna be
decorative starfish

and, for some reason,
an oar above the door.

Yeah. Take it easy,
Blackbeard.

We don't even know
what the man's offering.

Now...you do.

Is that a period
or a comma?

Comma, baby.
The punctuation
of the wealthy.

(GASPS)

Holy (BLEEP)
starfish money!
We're rich!

We're gonna have everything
monogrammed.

I don't like people
knowing my initials.

I'm gonna have to
mull it over.

You take your time.

You got till tomorrow.

ADULT ADAM: Even though taking
Formica Mike's buyout offer

seemed like a no-brainer,
our dad wasn't so sure.

I'm home!
I don't want to hear it!

Vic? W-What are
you doing here?

Beverly pulled me
into your ugly
domestic squabble.

Murray, you really need to
consider Formica Mike's offer.

Al, you wanna weigh in?
It was your shop first.

You want your legacy
stripped for parts?

For that kind of dough,
strip away!

It's just furniture.
Who cares?

Agreed!

It's mostly wood.
It's not that special.
Look out the window.

It's everywhere...
Tree, tree, little bush.

We could have
all our friends

to our shore house
on July Fourth,

and they would
quietly speculate

about how much
the house cost.

Oh! (CHUCKLES)

The envy
would eat 'em alive.

I'd certainly be curious
and resentful.

So, that's what
this is about,

you making
your friends jealous?

And you can finally
stop complaining about work.

I don't complain
about work.

It's all you do!

It's your defining
characteristic as a person!

Your negativity
has pulled me down, too.

I've spoken to my pastor
about it.

He'd like you to join us
at our men's picnic.

Mur, come on.
Take the deal.

I'm not taking it
until he apologizes.

Apologizes to you?
For what?

For big-timing me.

With his handsome
and excessive offer?

Let him big-time you, Mur.
Who cares?

I care! No deal.

Well, if all it takes
is an apology

to get me
a family beach house

that gives me generational
control of my children,

then so be it.

That seems misguided
and selfish, but you do you.

How are you gonna get
the Formica King to apologize

for trying to give Murray
a ton of money?

Easy.

I'm not going to him.

Beverly,
I'm so glad you called.

Who was that woman
who answered your phone?

My secretary.

You have a secretary?
For what?

To do all the things
I don't want to,

which is everything besides
shopping and drinking wine.

My God, I want your life.

It's yours. Just get
your Murray to accept
my Mikey's offer.

Well, this might sound crazy,
but could you get Mike

to give Murray just a teensy,
itsy-bitsy apology?

Done.

I thought
that would be harder.

Please. Apologies
are just words.
Words mean nothing.

Ah, that's how I feel!

ADULT ADAM:
As my mom and Fran
struck a deal,

I had a plan to make
my sister sorry
she turned me down.

Adam!
Please come in.

Welcome to our home.

Mwah! Mwah!

Oh, boy,
coming in hot.

And help yourself
to some gourmet snacks

or a variety
of freshly squeezed juices.

Those are my juices!

And why are you here?

Just letting you know
I found someone

to help me
finish the musical.

Oh, esteemed
creative partner!

Barry?

And is that the chalkboard
from our house?

We tied it to the bumper
and drove it here.
It has little wheels.

Dried fruit or nuts?

I'm allergic to both,
but let's do it.

What the hell
is going on?

Welcome to the new
and very improved
The Playground,

featuring Big Tasty!
Mm!

Dummies,
all the chalk came off.

Oh, stupid outside!

Then I'll summarize.
It's no longer about
Phil the Flower.

He was weak and gave the wrong
idea about the playground.

What's this idiot
talking about?

This idiot is talking about
injecting our musical

with explosive,
high-octane energy.

And it gets
even more bonkers!

Tell her who
the main character is.

A giant, ass-kicking
Tootsie Roll named Clyde.

Why the hell would
a fighting chocolate treat
be on a playground?

He fell out
of a kid's pocket.

Now he's gotta
find his way back,

with the help of Martin Riggs
of Riggs and Murtaugh.

You put the Lethal Weapon guys
in your musical?

Just Riggs.
He's an emotional time bomb,

and he's got three
jaunty numbers.

This is clinically insane.

That's the Riggs character.
But don't worry.

He accidentally
blows himself up
in the second act.

There's violence
on the playground?

And tons of sex.

You know that big
metal thing you spin?

Some randy teens
do unspeakable things on it.

And the nudity
is not tasteful.

But isn't this show
for kids?

I don't know who it's for.
I just know it kicks ass.

Now tell 'em about
the big finale.

Clyde the talking Tootsie
defends the playground

by destroying
a robotic shark
in a rap battle.

It's a real departure
from the original...

And also reality.

Enough!
You clearly ruined it!

But I thought you didn't care
about The Playground anymore.

Not until you
completely ripped out
its emotional appeal.

It's about the chutes
and ladders of childhood,

not shark robots.

Robotic sharks.

It's a small
but important distinction.

I guess
there's a solution...

You come back to finish
what we started.

Damn it, fine!

Sweet!
Barry, you're fired.

You'll regret this.

I don't know how,
and you're my ride,
but this isn't over.

(SIGHS) I'll be
waiting downstairs.

See ya at
the piano tomorrow.
(CHUCKLES) Ta!

You think everyone
had a nice time?

While my old musical duo
was back in business,

my mom had one last shot
to get my dad to take
Mike's deal.

(GROANS) I can't believe
you dragged me

to this dumb
country club.

Dumb? It's Ashborn.

I don't care where we are.
I don't want to be here.

When have you ever said no
to a free buffet?

Plus, Formica Mike
is gonna apologize

for whatever minor indignity
you suffered.

I'll believe that
when I see it.

Is that
a carving station?

You bet your tuchus.

Help yourself
to some meaty delights.

How many slices
can I get?

Take the whole
damn tenderloin.

Jimbo, put
the sweet beast
onto his plate.

(KNIVES SCRAPING)

I told you
this would work.

Pretty soon I'll be on
the shore, under an umbrella,

yelling at my grandkids not to
play Frisbee with strangers.

That's the dream.

And when you're
finished with that,

head over
to the dessert table,

grab yourself a big chunk
of Black Forest cake.

It's gonna ruin you for
two days, but it's worth it.

ADULT ADAM: Yep,
despite my dad

wanting nothing to do
with country-club life,

he did start to enjoy
the perks.

You found the schvitz.
Thought you disappeared.

I have to admit,
this is nice.

The nicest.

And all this can
be yours, Murray.

Is that your apology?

No.

This is.

I deeply regret
my action of offering
you all that money.

Please accept my apology
and all the money that
I originally offered you.

In that moment,
one "yes" from my dad

would change
our lives forever.

Instead, this happened.

Bevy, get the car.
We're going.

Where's your pants?

Stuck in a locker.
I don't know
the combination.

You didn't take the deal?
It's what you wanted!

No. It's what you wanted.

I want to go to work
every day.

What? You hate
going to work!

I know it seems like that,
but I love my job.

But you're never
not complaining about it.

Because I love
complaining.

And I love filling up
the cash register.

And I love
the dumb customers.

And I love having lunch
with Vic.

I love it.

I didn't know that.

Well, now you do.

**

There's my girl.

I got everything we need...
A piano, a kazoo,

and the finest instrument
there is, these sweet pipes.

Save it, Streisand.
Here ya go.

Whazdis?
The song you wanted.

But we haven't even
written it yet.

I did. Last night.

I figured it was easier
that way.

It's not about easy.
It's about collaborating,

coming together through
the power of music.

Hit the bricks,
Goldturds.

I signed out this room
for band practice.

No, you didn't.
I did.

Oh. It was
worth a shot.

And we're gonna be here
for a while

because we're writing
the grand finale
to our musical together.

We're not.
Take the room.

Cool beans.
Not cool beans!

I don't want this.

What the hell, man?
That took me 20 minutes!

Band drama. Noice.
Been there.

I've been asked to leave
over 243 bands.

Then maybe
you two should jam.

In! Our name is Butt Oven.

I'm lead vocals and guitar,
and you carry everything.

I'm not joining
Butt Oven!

I wanna write a song
with my sister.

I see why you two
didn't work out.

This one's a diva.

Good stuff.
So I'm gonna hit it.

Don't just go.
Please?

Dude, what is
going on with you?

What's going on with you?

I haven't seen you
all year.

I see you all the time.

When you're doing your laundry
or try to pry money from Dad.

You went to college,
and we became strangers.

So, what, this is your
lame attempt to reconnect?

It was lame,
but it was all I had.

And obviously
it didn't work.

See you whenever.

(CASSETTE CLATTERS)

(SIGHS)

ADULT ADAM:
After my sister rejected me
and I rejected her song,

the musical was stuck with
the biggest reject of all...

Barry.

This was
a good decision.

I guess, man.
Just do whatever.

Okay, dress is up.
I need my Tootsie Roll
and my Shark-I-Tron!

It's always been a dream
to work together.

(CHUCKLES)
What am I, again?

The fool I'm about to
lyrically smoke.

Drop a beat!

You know, I had my doubts,
but I think that
this might work.

(RAPPING)
* I'm a Tootsie Roll,
my name is Clyde

* On the playground,
I go down the slide

* I ride the swings
and the seesaw

* With my main man Riggs,
but not Murtaugh

* Something's comin'
in the park

* It's a giant
monster robot shark

* The kids all jump,
the sharks attack

* Riggs jumps on
my Tootsie back

* That's how I roll,
Clyde the Tootsie

* Now all the fly ladies
wanna play footsie

* Rest in peace,
Martin Riggs! *

Why do I keep
believing in children?

Good art is supposed to
make you ask questions.

Here's one... How could
half the partnership
from Lethal Weapon

be friends with
a piece of candy?

That's your problem
with it?

That's nothing a way-too-long
backstory rap can't solve.

Or there's
another option.

Erica?
Why are you here?

To apologize.

Everything you said
was true...

I've been prioritizing stuff
over you, and it's not cool.

And I don't want it
to be just words.
I mean it.

No matter where I'm at
in my life, I want you in it.

You're my baby brother.

So what are you saying?

I'm saying that it's time
for Goldberg and Goldberg

to finish
what they started.

Tootsie Roll, shark boy,
you're out.

Whatever!
I don't need any of you.

Except to get me
out of this thing.

Somebody unzip him!

Hey.

I don't wanna
talk about it.

I do.

All this time, I thought
I knew everything about you,

and I guess I don't.

Well, I certainly
don't make it easy.

Well, we could
both be better

about telling each other
what we want.

I didn't know you wanted
a beach house so badly.

I don't care about
some dumb house.

I care about
what's in it...

Our family being together
and happy.

If I can have all that,
it can always be right here.

But the thing is,
Mike's right.

My business is changing.

So what are you thinking?

I'm not sure.

But I do know
I've been too complacent.

And if we're ever gonna
get that shore house,

I got to do something bold.

Well, whatever you do,
I'm always right behind you.

(PAUL SIMON'S
YOU CAN CALL ME AL PLAYS)

ADULT ADAM: Sometimes
it takes a glimpse
of the future

to help you focus
on the now.

You wanted to talk?

You want to expand.
I don't want to sell.

So why don't we go
in business together?

Partners?

I figured that you and I
could team up

and take on the big boys.

Or become the big boys.

ADULT ADAM:
Life is full of surprises...

Like when the people
from your past
find their way back.

And when you're open
to new possibilities,
the future is bright.

(CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING)

I feel like we didn't
kick the tires
on the name long enough.

(CAMERA SHUTTERS CLICKING)
Buckle up, Murray.
I'm a difficult partner.

It's true.
He's way too much.

In the end, as long
as you make time
for the people you love,

the playground of life
can be a lot more fun.

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

**

* I'm a pretty,
pretty flower *

(SCREAMING)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

(BELL DINGS)

(CHUCKLES)
Le Bec-Fin!

I can't believe
I'm really here.

This is a very
exciting time for you.

Oh, it really is.

And I am eager to discuss

my new role at the store
moving forward.

You shall have the noble title
of Baron of the Bookcases.

A baron?

Hot dog!

And there's gonna be
some other new stuff.

For instance,
no more sitting.

What's that, now?

I work my employees
very hard.

If you can lean,
you can clean.

But royalty
doesn't clean.

They're supposed to lean.

Not in my kingdom.

La Bec-Fin!