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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,254 --> 00:00:06,382 [ Mac ] 2 00:00:03,254 --> 00:00:06,382 A reading from the Holy Bible. 3 00:00:03,254 --> 00:00:06,382 Genesis, chapter one. 4 00:00:06,424 --> 00:00:08,467 "God created 5 00:00:06,424 --> 00:00:08,467 the heaven and the earth, 6 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:12,012 and the earth was without 7 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:12,012 form and void, and darkness was 8 00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:12,012 upon the face of the deep..." 9 00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,765 Hey, buddy, do we have 10 00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,765 to be kneeling 11 00:00:12,054 --> 00:00:13,765 this entire time? 12 00:00:13,806 --> 00:00:15,641 Yeah, this is not comfortable. 13 00:00:13,806 --> 00:00:15,641 I mean, it's gonna get 14 00:00:13,806 --> 00:00:15,641 uncomfortable. 15 00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:19,812 Yes, you need to be kneeling. 16 00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:19,812 It's 11:58, and Mac Day's about 17 00:00:15,683 --> 00:00:19,812 to officially start. 18 00:00:19,854 --> 00:00:22,648 - I want there to be ceremony. 19 00:00:19,854 --> 00:00:22,648 - Are we gonna be in the 20 00:00:19,854 --> 00:00:22,648 dark the whole time? 21 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:25,317 My goodness, this is 22 00:00:22,690 --> 00:00:25,317 a lot of complaining. 23 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,278 Charlie, can you please remind 24 00:00:25,359 --> 00:00:27,278 everyone of the rules? 25 00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:29,238 We are about to officially 26 00:00:27,319 --> 00:00:29,238 begin Mac Day. 27 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:32,825 For the entirety of this day, 28 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:32,825 we will forced to do everything 29 00:00:29,280 --> 00:00:32,825 Mac wants us to do. 30 00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:34,326 And if anyone is caught 31 00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:34,326 complaining? 32 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,370 An extra day is added 33 00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:36,370 to Mac Day. 34 00:00:36,412 --> 00:00:38,664 If you cannot resist the urge 35 00:00:36,412 --> 00:00:38,664 to complain, you are allowed... 36 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:41,459 one scream a day 37 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:41,459 into the ceremonial 38 00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:41,459 screaming pillow. 39 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,502 That's right. 40 00:00:41,500 --> 00:00:43,502 Charlie, when it was your day, 41 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:46,464 did I complain about searching 42 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:46,464 for goblins for 10 hours 43 00:00:43,544 --> 00:00:46,464 straight? 44 00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:49,425 Well, ghouls, and, no, you 45 00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:49,425 didn't complain, 'cause we found 46 00:00:46,505 --> 00:00:49,425 three. It was pretty sweet. 47 00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:50,760 We found none. 48 00:00:49,467 --> 00:00:50,760 Yeah? 49 00:00:50,802 --> 00:00:52,344 We found no ghouls, 50 00:00:50,802 --> 00:00:52,344 we found no goblins, 51 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:54,054 we found no gremlins, 52 00:00:52,386 --> 00:00:54,054 because they don't exist. 53 00:00:54,096 --> 00:00:55,723 Well-- 54 00:00:54,096 --> 00:00:55,723 Guys. 55 00:00:55,765 --> 00:00:57,976 This whole thing was 56 00:00:55,765 --> 00:00:57,976 meant to bring us closer 57 00:00:55,765 --> 00:00:57,976 together, 58 00:00:58,017 --> 00:01:01,270 and by the end of it, 59 00:00:58,017 --> 00:01:01,270 you're gonna feel 60 00:00:58,017 --> 00:01:01,270 a little bit closer to me, 61 00:01:01,312 --> 00:01:04,816 and if I've done my job right, 62 00:01:01,312 --> 00:01:04,816 a little bit closer to God. 63 00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:09,111 Because I've modeled my day 64 00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:09,111 after the seven days 65 00:01:04,857 --> 00:01:09,111 of God's creation, 66 00:01:09,153 --> 00:01:11,656 making my one day feel 67 00:01:09,153 --> 00:01:11,656 like an entire week. 68 00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,532 Oh! 69 00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,532 Come on, man. 70 00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,532 Really? 71 00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,117 For crying out loud, 72 00:01:13,574 --> 00:01:15,117 my knees are-- 73 00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:18,913 Three, two, one, 74 00:01:15,159 --> 00:01:18,913 begin! 75 00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:21,457 On the first day, God said, 76 00:01:18,955 --> 00:01:21,457 "Let there be... 77 00:01:24,293 --> 00:01:25,837 Mac." 78 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,319 Seven straight hours 79 00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,319 of lecturing? 80 00:01:50,361 --> 00:01:52,071 Yeah, and five hours alone 81 00:01:50,361 --> 00:01:52,071 dedicated... 82 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,990 to the evils of homosexuality, 83 00:01:52,112 --> 00:01:53,990 from him? 84 00:01:54,032 --> 00:01:56,826 Did anyone else notice that he 85 00:01:54,032 --> 00:01:56,826 had an erection the entire time? 86 00:01:56,868 --> 00:01:58,661 Of course. 87 00:01:56,868 --> 00:01:58,661 How could 88 00:01:56,868 --> 00:01:58,661 you miss it? 89 00:01:58,703 --> 00:02:01,080 It was, like, shooting-- 90 00:01:58,703 --> 00:02:01,080 It was right there. 91 00:01:58,703 --> 00:02:01,080 Shh, shh, shh-- Here he comes. 92 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:04,208 Okay, guys, I want to introduce 93 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:04,208 a new theme to the day. 94 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:08,128 So I'd like to infuse the 95 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:08,128 religious angle with the theme 96 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:08,128 of badass. 97 00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:10,130 And I quote once again 98 00:02:08,170 --> 00:02:10,130 from Genesis. 99 00:02:10,172 --> 00:02:14,052 "And God said, '‘Let there be 100 00:02:10,172 --> 00:02:14,052 a firmament in the midst 101 00:02:10,172 --> 00:02:14,052 of the waters, 102 00:02:14,093 --> 00:02:16,428 and let it divide the 103 00:02:14,093 --> 00:02:16,428 waters from the waters.' 104 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,765 And God made the firmament 105 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,765 and divided the waters which 106 00:02:16,470 --> 00:02:19,765 were under the firmament... 107 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,226 from the waters which were 108 00:02:19,807 --> 00:02:22,226 above the firmament. 109 00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:24,020 And it was so." 110 00:02:24,062 --> 00:02:26,522 - There you have it. 111 00:02:24,062 --> 00:02:26,522 - There we have what? 112 00:02:26,564 --> 00:02:28,232 Uh, the what...? 113 00:02:26,564 --> 00:02:28,232 What are you saying? 114 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:32,653 It's water. I'm saying "water," 115 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:32,653 'cause it said water, 116 00:02:28,273 --> 00:02:32,653 like, eight times. 117 00:02:32,695 --> 00:02:34,530 So, it's water. That's what 118 00:02:32,695 --> 00:02:34,530 the whole thing is-- water. 119 00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:37,491 - Water what? 120 00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:37,491 - Water and badass, 121 00:02:34,572 --> 00:02:37,491 badass and water. 122 00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:39,535 - Ah. 123 00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:39,535 - Yes! 124 00:02:39,577 --> 00:02:41,203 We're doing a Project Badass 125 00:02:39,577 --> 00:02:41,203 video over the Schuylkill River. 126 00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:43,706 Yes! Yes! 127 00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:43,706 Yes! 128 00:02:43,748 --> 00:02:46,542 All right! Hey! 129 00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:48,210 [ Motorcycle Idling ] 130 00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:48,210 Do you guys hear 131 00:02:46,584 --> 00:02:48,210 the motorcycle? 132 00:02:48,252 --> 00:02:50,088 I have another special surprise. 133 00:02:50,129 --> 00:02:52,506 We will be joined by my cousin 134 00:02:50,129 --> 00:02:52,506 all day! 135 00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:55,009 - Your cousin? 136 00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:55,009 - Yeah, my cousin 137 00:02:52,548 --> 00:02:55,009 from the country. 138 00:02:55,051 --> 00:02:57,302 I haven't seen him in, like, 139 00:02:55,051 --> 00:02:57,302 forever, but, guys, trust me. 140 00:02:57,344 --> 00:03:00,514 He's, like, the second biggest 141 00:02:57,344 --> 00:03:00,514 badass I know, so, it's gonna 142 00:02:57,344 --> 00:03:00,514 be awesome. 143 00:03:00,556 --> 00:03:02,516 Country Mac coming 144 00:03:00,556 --> 00:03:02,516 to the big city. 145 00:03:02,558 --> 00:03:04,977 [ Groans ] 146 00:03:05,019 --> 00:03:06,854 Country Mac! 147 00:03:06,896 --> 00:03:08,480 Hey, City Mac! 148 00:03:08,522 --> 00:03:10,149 [ Laughter ] 149 00:03:10,190 --> 00:03:12,276 [ Imitating Wind Whipping ] 150 00:03:18,032 --> 00:03:21,326 [ Wind Whipping Continues ] 151 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,996 Holy shit, 152 00:03:21,368 --> 00:03:23,996 there's two of them. 153 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,919 Okay, I think 154 00:03:27,207 --> 00:03:29,919 I like this framing. 155 00:03:29,961 --> 00:03:32,504 I don't even know 156 00:03:29,961 --> 00:03:32,504 what it is 157 00:03:29,961 --> 00:03:32,504 you want us to do. 158 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,257 [ Sighs ] 159 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,257 Well, I'm gonna jump from 160 00:03:32,546 --> 00:03:35,257 the Strawberry Mansion Bridge. 161 00:03:35,299 --> 00:03:36,425 What? 162 00:03:35,299 --> 00:03:36,425 Holy shit! 163 00:03:35,299 --> 00:03:36,425 Yes! 164 00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:38,260 What do you mean, from it? 165 00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:38,260 To the water? 166 00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,512 [ Dee ] What? 167 00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,512 Yeah, I'm gonna jump from the 168 00:03:38,302 --> 00:03:40,512 top of the bridge to the water. 169 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,347 Okay, I need you to act 170 00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:42,347 like concerned citizens, 171 00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,892 but I need this 172 00:03:42,389 --> 00:03:44,892 to feel real, okay, guys? 173 00:03:44,934 --> 00:03:48,604 So, I need you to be neutral 174 00:03:44,934 --> 00:03:48,604 about the jumper prior to the 175 00:03:44,934 --> 00:03:48,604 jump, 'cause you don't know me. 176 00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:52,566 You don't know this man. 177 00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:52,566 But I need you to react 178 00:03:48,646 --> 00:03:52,566 at the same time... 179 00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,194 because I need to draw 180 00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,194 the jump in later 181 00:03:52,608 --> 00:03:55,194 to match your reaction. 182 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,989 You lost me there. What do 183 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,989 you mean, "Draw the jump?" 184 00:03:55,235 --> 00:03:57,989 You're not jumping? 185 00:03:58,030 --> 00:04:00,532 No, I'm not gonna jump. 186 00:03:58,030 --> 00:04:00,532 Of course I wouldn't jump. 187 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:03,243 I draw it in later because 188 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:03,243 it's like a post effect. 189 00:04:03,285 --> 00:04:05,121 Well, what's badass 190 00:04:03,285 --> 00:04:05,121 about that? 191 00:04:05,163 --> 00:04:07,247 Your reaction is badass, 192 00:04:05,163 --> 00:04:07,247 you know? 193 00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:10,459 I want you to scream, "Badass! 194 00:04:07,289 --> 00:04:10,459 You know, that dude is badass! 195 00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,461 I've never seen 196 00:04:10,501 --> 00:04:12,461 anything as badass as that." 197 00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:15,131 You know? 198 00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:15,131 But don't say my name, 199 00:04:12,503 --> 00:04:15,131 'cause you don't know this man. 200 00:04:15,173 --> 00:04:16,882 That's why it feels real, 201 00:04:15,173 --> 00:04:16,882 you know? 202 00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:20,136 Now, later, if you want to do, 203 00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:20,136 like, a Rudy-type situation... 204 00:04:20,178 --> 00:04:22,680 where you carry me through 205 00:04:20,178 --> 00:04:22,680 the streets of Philadelphia, 206 00:04:20,178 --> 00:04:22,680 you know, that's cool. 207 00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:24,598 - We won't. 208 00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:24,598 - I can put that 209 00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:24,598 in the schedule. 210 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,684 - It's that a post effect? 211 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,684 - No, that's a practical effect. 212 00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:28,894 That would happen real, 213 00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:28,894 but only if it's organic, 214 00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:28,894 you know? 215 00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:32,064 I'm lost, I'm lost. 216 00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:32,064 This is a goddamn mess, this 217 00:04:28,936 --> 00:04:32,064 whole thing's a goddamn mess. 218 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:33,816 You're not gonna be badass, 219 00:04:32,106 --> 00:04:33,816 but you're gonna-- 220 00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:36,527 This is all sounding 221 00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:36,527 a little bit like a complaint 222 00:04:33,858 --> 00:04:36,527 from you guys. 223 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,237 Who's complaining? 224 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,237 We don't know 225 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:38,237 what's going on! 226 00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,198 Everybody smile. 227 00:04:38,278 --> 00:04:40,198 Everybody smiling. 228 00:04:40,239 --> 00:04:41,740 We don't know you. 229 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,576 Mac! Mac! Mac! 230 00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:44,576 Mac! Mac! Mac! Mac! Mac! 231 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,787 Badass! Badass! Badass! 232 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,787 [ All ] 233 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,787 Badass! Badass! 234 00:04:46,829 --> 00:04:49,165 All right, Country Mac, 235 00:04:46,829 --> 00:04:49,165 let's do-- Keep it going. 236 00:04:46,829 --> 00:04:49,165 Keep it going. 237 00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:51,375 Badass! Badass! Badass! 238 00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:51,375 Let's do this! 239 00:04:49,207 --> 00:04:51,375 Let's do this! 240 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:53,085 Badass. 241 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:53,085 Badass. 242 00:04:53,127 --> 00:04:55,420 [ Screams ] 243 00:04:58,216 --> 00:05:00,718 It's pretty high, it's good. 244 00:04:58,216 --> 00:05:00,718 It's excellent, 245 00:04:58,216 --> 00:05:00,718 it's gonna be great. 246 00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:02,553 You better jump quick before 247 00:05:00,759 --> 00:05:02,553 somebody tries to stop you. 248 00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:04,596 Trust me, no one's gonna try 249 00:05:02,594 --> 00:05:04,596 and stop me. 250 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,224 [ Man ] 251 00:05:04,638 --> 00:05:06,224 Jump, asshole! 252 00:05:06,265 --> 00:05:09,185 Yep. See, in the big city, 253 00:05:06,265 --> 00:05:09,185 nobody cares whether 254 00:05:06,265 --> 00:05:09,185 you live or die. 255 00:05:09,227 --> 00:05:10,978 [ Man #2 ] 256 00:05:09,227 --> 00:05:10,978 Jump, you pussy! 257 00:05:11,020 --> 00:05:13,647 All right, have a nice day. 258 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:18,152 Okay, so, I'm gonna run 259 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:18,152 to the end, book as fast 260 00:05:13,689 --> 00:05:18,152 as I can to the fence, 261 00:05:18,194 --> 00:05:22,948 climb up to the top, stop, 262 00:05:18,194 --> 00:05:22,948 climb back down to safety, 263 00:05:18,194 --> 00:05:22,948 that's it. 264 00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:25,450 - So, you're not gonna jump? 265 00:05:22,990 --> 00:05:25,450 - I don't jump, okay? 266 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:27,327 Why does everybody think I jump? 267 00:05:25,492 --> 00:05:27,327 Nobody jumps. 268 00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:30,664 Evel Knievel didn't jump. 269 00:05:27,369 --> 00:05:30,664 Johnny Knoxville doesn't jump. 270 00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:33,667 Okay, this is big Hollywood 271 00:05:30,706 --> 00:05:33,667 stuff, okay? Just stand back. 272 00:05:33,709 --> 00:05:36,795 I don't want you to get hurt. 273 00:05:33,709 --> 00:05:36,795 Let me handle it. 274 00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,380 [ Sighs ] 275 00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:43,302 Oh, wow! Oh, there's a man 276 00:05:40,299 --> 00:05:43,302 standing on the bridge. 277 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,179 What? 278 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,179 Yes, he looks like-- 279 00:05:43,343 --> 00:05:45,179 Look at that. 280 00:05:45,221 --> 00:05:47,306 His name is Mac. 281 00:05:45,221 --> 00:05:47,306 No, we don't know his name. 282 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,808 We don't know it. 283 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,808 His name is Rudy, 284 00:05:47,347 --> 00:05:49,808 I believe, you guys. 285 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,936 That's what it was-- Rudy. 286 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,936 We don't know 287 00:05:49,850 --> 00:05:51,936 what his name is. 288 00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:54,479 And that's okay, but we 289 00:05:51,977 --> 00:05:54,479 don't know each other. Hi. 290 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,689 How are you? 291 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:55,689 Nice to meet you. 292 00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:58,234 But it looks like 293 00:05:55,731 --> 00:05:58,234 he may commit suicide. 294 00:05:58,276 --> 00:06:00,152 Ah! 295 00:05:58,276 --> 00:06:00,152 Suicide is badass. 296 00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:02,487 Right! 297 00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:02,487 No, no, no, no, Rudy's not 298 00:06:00,194 --> 00:06:02,487 trying to kill himself. 299 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,573 We don't know his name. 300 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,573 He just likes to jump, 301 00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,573 I guess. 302 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:07,910 Yeah, right. 303 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:07,910 Mac is the one who's 304 00:06:04,615 --> 00:06:07,910 the badass, remember that. 305 00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:10,746 Will you stop, stop, stop? 306 00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:10,746 Everybody stop. Come on, guys. 307 00:06:07,952 --> 00:06:10,746 What are we doing? 308 00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:12,664 We got to get 309 00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:12,664 on the same page. 310 00:06:10,788 --> 00:06:12,664 I don't know what we're doing. 311 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,333 It's so unclear. 312 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,333 He gave us, like-- 313 00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,333 We don't know what we're doing. 314 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,877 Maybe just you talk. 315 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,877 Well, whatever it is, we got 316 00:06:14,374 --> 00:06:16,877 to get on the same page. 317 00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,129 Otherwise, we're 318 00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,129 gonna have to do it 319 00:06:16,919 --> 00:06:18,129 over and over and over-- 320 00:06:18,170 --> 00:06:20,631 [ Water Splashing ] 321 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:23,259 Did someone just go plop? 322 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:23,259 Someone just jumped. 323 00:06:20,672 --> 00:06:23,259 Someone jumped. 324 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:25,636 He jumped! That's it! 325 00:06:23,301 --> 00:06:25,636 He jumped, guys! He jumped! 326 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:28,973 The day's over, the day's over. 327 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:28,973 Country Mac is gone, he's dead. 328 00:06:25,677 --> 00:06:28,973 Let's get out of here. 329 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:31,475 - Look! Look, look, look! 330 00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:31,475 - What? What? Oh. 331 00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:35,271 - [ Dee ] Whoa! 332 00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:35,271 - [ Dennis ] 333 00:06:31,516 --> 00:06:35,271 Oh, holy shit! Oh, my God! 334 00:06:35,313 --> 00:06:37,689 [ Dee ] 335 00:06:35,313 --> 00:06:37,689 Wow! 336 00:06:35,313 --> 00:06:37,689 Well, how'd that look? 337 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,609 Oh, amazing! All right! 338 00:06:37,731 --> 00:06:40,609 How did it look? 339 00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:42,611 How did it-- 340 00:06:40,651 --> 00:06:42,611 It looked badass, dude. 341 00:06:42,653 --> 00:06:44,947 I cannot believe you jumped. 342 00:06:42,653 --> 00:06:44,947 Whoa! 343 00:06:44,989 --> 00:06:47,532 No, that's not really badass, 344 00:06:44,989 --> 00:06:47,532 guys. That's dangerous. 345 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,328 Um, can we put him 346 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,328 on our shoulders 347 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:50,328 and parade him around like Rudy? 348 00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:52,163 I'm feeling that now. 349 00:06:50,369 --> 00:06:52,163 I want to do that. 350 00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:55,666 [ Overlapping Chatter ] 351 00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:55,666 No, no, no, I don't think 352 00:06:52,204 --> 00:06:55,666 that's gonna work anymore. 353 00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:57,793 That's not gonna fit into our 354 00:06:55,707 --> 00:06:57,793 schedule, you know? I mean-- 355 00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:00,504 - I mean, it was your idea-- 356 00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:00,504 - No, we're very full. 357 00:06:57,835 --> 00:07:00,504 We're very full now. 358 00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:03,507 This is not gonna play. We're 359 00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:03,507 gonna move on to day four now. 360 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,217 Wait, wait, wait. 361 00:07:03,548 --> 00:07:05,217 You skipped day three. 362 00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:08,887 Uh, day three is when God 363 00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:08,887 created trees and grass 364 00:07:05,259 --> 00:07:08,887 and nature. 365 00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:11,598 You know, kind of a bullshit 366 00:07:08,929 --> 00:07:11,598 day, so we're gonna move on... 367 00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:15,560 to day four where God 368 00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:15,560 created the stars. 369 00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:22,442 If you look at the Orion 370 00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:22,442 constellation and then track 371 00:07:19,273 --> 00:07:22,442 across to the Big Dipper, 372 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:25,154 you'll see a gaseous, 373 00:07:22,484 --> 00:07:25,154 cloud-like area. 374 00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:28,740 [ Quietly ] 375 00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:28,740 Okay, I'm gonna need 376 00:07:25,196 --> 00:07:28,740 you guys to go ahead... 377 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:31,035 and ignore everything 378 00:07:28,782 --> 00:07:31,035 that this clown is saying. 379 00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:34,538 God created the stars 380 00:07:31,076 --> 00:07:34,538 5,000 years ago. 381 00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:36,665 Uh, who has the pillow? 382 00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:36,665 I need a pillow. 383 00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:38,625 [ Can Clicks Open ] 384 00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:38,625 I think I thought 385 00:07:36,707 --> 00:07:38,625 of a way... 386 00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,836 that we can work day three 387 00:07:38,667 --> 00:07:40,836 into this experience. 388 00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:45,174 No, we're on day four. 389 00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:45,174 And, besides, there's no trees 390 00:07:40,878 --> 00:07:45,174 or herbs in the planetarium. 391 00:07:45,216 --> 00:07:47,343 But there's herb. 392 00:07:45,216 --> 00:07:47,343 Hmm? 393 00:07:47,385 --> 00:07:50,637 Who wants to smoke a "J"? 394 00:07:47,385 --> 00:07:50,637 Oh, shit. 395 00:07:47,385 --> 00:07:50,637 You brought weed? 396 00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,723 No, no, no, 397 00:07:50,679 --> 00:07:52,723 we're not smoking weed, okay? 398 00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,599 It's still illegal 399 00:07:52,764 --> 00:07:54,599 in the state of Pennsylvania. 400 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:56,685 Puff, puff, pass, 401 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:56,685 bitches. 402 00:07:54,641 --> 00:07:56,685 Yeah. 403 00:07:56,727 --> 00:07:58,979 Yeah, come on, Mac, shut up. 404 00:07:56,727 --> 00:07:58,979 I thought you were a badass. 405 00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:02,233 [ Sighs ] 406 00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:02,233 There's nothing badass 407 00:07:59,021 --> 00:08:02,233 about breaking the law, Charlie. 408 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:05,194 [ Coughs ] 409 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:05,194 This is gonna make it 410 00:08:02,274 --> 00:08:05,194 way more fun, dude. 411 00:08:05,236 --> 00:08:09,907 This isn't about fun. 412 00:08:05,236 --> 00:08:09,907 It's about fearing God, okay? 413 00:08:05,236 --> 00:08:09,907 I'm trying to convert you guys. 414 00:08:09,948 --> 00:08:11,783 Oh, my God, is that 415 00:08:09,948 --> 00:08:11,783 what this is about? 416 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:14,703 You're not gonna convert me in 417 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:14,703 one day. I don't believe in God. 418 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:19,666 Well, you should. 419 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:19,666 Because if you don't, God will 420 00:08:14,745 --> 00:08:19,666 make a flood or a famine, okay? 421 00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:23,628 He will destroy you 422 00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:23,628 with tornadoes 423 00:08:19,708 --> 00:08:23,628 and earthquakes and AIDS. 424 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,297 Where do you think 425 00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:25,297 AIDS came from? 426 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:27,341 Uh, hello, God's gift 427 00:08:25,339 --> 00:08:27,341 to the gays. 428 00:08:27,383 --> 00:08:29,301 [ Groans ] 429 00:08:27,383 --> 00:08:29,301 Oh, my God. 430 00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:31,053 You're gonna ruin 431 00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:31,053 this high, dude. 432 00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:33,555 Mac, I think you're 433 00:08:31,095 --> 00:08:33,555 a little confused there. 434 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:37,142 I mean, yeah, sure, 435 00:08:33,597 --> 00:08:37,142 bad things do happen. 436 00:08:37,184 --> 00:08:38,894 But what about sunsets? 437 00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:40,396 [ Charlie ] 438 00:08:38,936 --> 00:08:40,396 Oh, yeah. 439 00:08:40,438 --> 00:08:41,730 French kisses. 440 00:08:41,772 --> 00:08:43,315 [ Country Mac ] 441 00:08:41,772 --> 00:08:43,315 The smell of rain. 442 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:46,568 - [ Dennis ] 443 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:46,568 Oh, yeah. 444 00:08:43,357 --> 00:08:46,568 - That's why I believe in God. 445 00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:47,819 Yeah. 446 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:51,573 Not because of the things 447 00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:51,573 that he takes away from us, 448 00:08:51,615 --> 00:08:54,743 but because of the things 449 00:08:51,615 --> 00:08:54,743 that he gives to us. 450 00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:57,162 Oh, dude. 451 00:08:54,785 --> 00:08:57,162 Shit, dude. 452 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,830 You just ripped a hole 453 00:08:57,204 --> 00:08:58,830 in my mind. 454 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,791 See, that's the God I-- 455 00:08:58,872 --> 00:09:00,791 I like that. 456 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,168 - I'm choosing that one. 457 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,168 - Excuse me, who's talking 458 00:09:00,832 --> 00:09:03,168 back there? 459 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:05,545 Shut up, 460 00:09:03,210 --> 00:09:05,545 science bitch. 461 00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:10,342 Yeah. Yeah, shut up, 462 00:09:07,756 --> 00:09:10,342 science bitch! 463 00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:11,927 Aw, dude, dude, dude. 464 00:09:10,384 --> 00:09:11,927 Come on, man. 465 00:09:11,969 --> 00:09:13,595 He just said it. 466 00:09:11,969 --> 00:09:13,595 He just said it. 467 00:09:13,637 --> 00:09:14,805 He just did it. 468 00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:19,059 [ Whirring ] 469 00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:22,521 Oh. What the hell? 470 00:09:24,898 --> 00:09:26,525 [ Machine Bangs ] 471 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:29,611 Carbs-wise, this 472 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:29,611 is gonna set me back, 473 00:09:26,566 --> 00:09:29,611 but I don't even give a shit. 474 00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:32,030 [ Machine Bangs ] 475 00:09:29,653 --> 00:09:32,030 Yes. 476 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:34,574 - Country Mac's awesome. 477 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:34,574 - Yes. 478 00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,410 - Yeah. 479 00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,410 - This weed that he gave us 480 00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,410 is awesome. 481 00:09:36,452 --> 00:09:37,953 - It's-- 482 00:09:36,452 --> 00:09:37,953 - Yes. 483 00:09:37,995 --> 00:09:39,413 Yeah. 484 00:09:39,455 --> 00:09:42,416 All these years I've been 485 00:09:39,455 --> 00:09:42,416 feeling like I hate karate. 486 00:09:44,335 --> 00:09:49,798 And, like, I hate 487 00:09:44,335 --> 00:09:49,798 Project Badass 488 00:09:44,335 --> 00:09:49,798 and, like, I hate God. 489 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:55,012 - Yes. 490 00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:55,012 - But, like, I realize-- 491 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:58,265 You know? 492 00:09:55,053 --> 00:09:58,265 What I really hate... 493 00:09:58,307 --> 00:09:59,724 is Mac. 494 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:04,771 - Yes. 495 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:04,771 - Like, he's made all those 496 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:04,771 cool things suck. 497 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:09,360 Not only is he, like, 498 00:10:04,813 --> 00:10:09,360 ruining my life, 499 00:10:09,401 --> 00:10:12,363 but with all this God shit 500 00:10:09,401 --> 00:10:12,363 that he's into... 501 00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:14,323 he could be ruining 502 00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:14,323 my afterlife. 503 00:10:14,365 --> 00:10:16,033 Yes. 504 00:10:17,075 --> 00:10:19,161 [ Grunts ] 505 00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:21,288 I thought that one 506 00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:21,288 was gonna-- 507 00:10:19,203 --> 00:10:21,288 Let me try. 508 00:10:28,962 --> 00:10:30,922 So-- 509 00:10:30,964 --> 00:10:32,632 Yeah, I get that. 510 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,849 Okay, I feel like we got 511 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,849 a little bit off the rails 512 00:10:37,846 --> 00:10:40,849 back there, 513 00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:42,518 but I'm ready 514 00:10:40,891 --> 00:10:42,518 to get back on. 515 00:10:42,560 --> 00:10:46,313 Dude, did you guys see 516 00:10:42,560 --> 00:10:46,313 the way Country Mac 517 00:10:42,560 --> 00:10:46,313 was riding his motorcycle? 518 00:10:46,355 --> 00:10:48,524 Badass, dude! 519 00:10:46,355 --> 00:10:48,524 No, it was reckless 520 00:10:46,355 --> 00:10:48,524 once again. 521 00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:50,067 Come on, man. 522 00:10:48,566 --> 00:10:50,067 I thought it was awesome! 523 00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:51,776 He was like Batman, 524 00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:51,776 just zipping 525 00:10:50,108 --> 00:10:51,776 through the cars. 526 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,987 Totally. 527 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,987 He beat us here by, 528 00:10:51,818 --> 00:10:53,987 like, an hour. 529 00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:55,614 Oh, I want to get 530 00:10:54,029 --> 00:10:55,614 a motorcycle, man. 531 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,366 [ Charlie ] 532 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,366 Dude, we should all 533 00:10:55,655 --> 00:10:57,366 get motorcycles! 534 00:10:57,408 --> 00:11:00,827 Okay, enough! Okay? 535 00:10:57,408 --> 00:11:00,827 Enough about Country Mac. 536 00:10:57,408 --> 00:11:00,827 It's still my day. 537 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,663 Yeah. 538 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,663 Thank you. 539 00:11:00,869 --> 00:11:03,663 On the fifth day, God made fish. 540 00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,165 So we'll just skip 541 00:11:03,705 --> 00:11:05,165 right past that. 542 00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,791 Yeah, we'll skip that. 543 00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,791 You're skipping a lot 544 00:11:05,207 --> 00:11:06,791 of days, dude. 545 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,960 Well, you can't fit it all 546 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,960 into one day. 547 00:11:06,833 --> 00:11:08,960 That's preposterous. 548 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,838 You're the one who came up 549 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,838 with the structure, 550 00:11:09,002 --> 00:11:11,838 so... that's preposterous. 551 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:16,134 All right, on the sixth day, 552 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:16,134 God created the beasts 553 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:16,134 of the earth... 554 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:19,137 and he made man 555 00:11:16,176 --> 00:11:19,137 in his own image. 556 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:23,016 And beholdeth... 557 00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:23,016 the image of God. 558 00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:26,144 ♪♪ [ Techno ] 559 00:11:26,186 --> 00:11:27,687 Oh, shit. 560 00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:32,817 Okay, everybody grab 561 00:11:29,898 --> 00:11:32,817 some grease. 562 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:35,737 - Why? 563 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:35,737 - Because we're gonna grease up 564 00:11:32,859 --> 00:11:35,737 these beefcakes. 565 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:39,199 No! No! Come on! No! 566 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:39,199 Frank, take it easy, 567 00:11:35,779 --> 00:11:39,199 Frank. 568 00:11:39,241 --> 00:11:42,035 Frank, you better 569 00:11:39,241 --> 00:11:42,035 take it easy! Listen! 570 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:45,247 These guys work off 571 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:45,247 their beautiful glutes 572 00:11:42,077 --> 00:11:45,247 for our enjoyment, okay? 573 00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:48,292 The least we can do is 574 00:11:45,289 --> 00:11:48,292 pay them back in tan and grease. 575 00:11:50,127 --> 00:11:51,753 [ Groans ] 576 00:11:50,127 --> 00:11:51,753 Greasing dudes. 577 00:11:50,127 --> 00:11:51,753 Yep. 578 00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:53,880 - That's why we're here today. 579 00:11:51,795 --> 00:11:53,880 - I ain't doing this! 580 00:11:53,922 --> 00:11:58,385 - About time you guys got here. 581 00:11:53,922 --> 00:11:58,385 - Country Mac, man. Hey, bro. 582 00:11:58,427 --> 00:11:59,928 Listen, dude, can you 583 00:11:58,427 --> 00:11:59,928 get us out of here? 584 00:11:59,970 --> 00:12:01,388 Yeah, you got to get us 585 00:11:59,970 --> 00:12:01,388 out of here, man. 586 00:12:01,430 --> 00:12:03,890 Get out of here? 587 00:12:01,430 --> 00:12:03,890 I'm lovin' it. 588 00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,350 I've been gettin' phone numbers 589 00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:05,350 left and right. 590 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,394 Oh, sweet, 591 00:12:05,392 --> 00:12:07,394 there's chicks here? 592 00:12:07,436 --> 00:12:11,189 Chicks? No. 593 00:12:07,436 --> 00:12:11,189 Dudes. 594 00:12:11,231 --> 00:12:12,732 I'm into dudes. 595 00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:15,277 Oh. You're gay. 596 00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:17,446 Loud and proud, brother. 597 00:12:15,319 --> 00:12:17,446 Loud and proud. 598 00:12:17,488 --> 00:12:18,822 Yeah, ain't nothing wrong 599 00:12:17,488 --> 00:12:18,822 with that. 600 00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:20,115 There's nothing wrong 601 00:12:18,863 --> 00:12:20,115 with that. 602 00:12:20,157 --> 00:12:21,992 Honestly, it's, like, 603 00:12:20,157 --> 00:12:21,992 refreshing to hear. 604 00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:23,827 You know what, happy hunting, 605 00:12:22,033 --> 00:12:23,827 bro, get after it. 606 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,996 Cool, cool, cool. 607 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,996 I'll see you all 608 00:12:23,868 --> 00:12:25,996 in a little bit. 609 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:28,832 Cool, yeah, yeah. 610 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:28,832 See, he doesn't want us 611 00:12:26,037 --> 00:12:28,832 to grease them, you know? 612 00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,542 God, that's awesome. 613 00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:30,542 Because he wants them. 614 00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:32,503 It doe-- Right. 615 00:12:30,584 --> 00:12:32,503 He wants them for himself. 616 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:35,297 It's so much more comfortable 617 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:35,297 when someone's gay 618 00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:35,297 and open about it. 619 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:38,008 It's fantastic. 620 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:38,008 And, like, I know we've never 621 00:12:35,339 --> 00:12:38,008 said this as a group, but-- 622 00:12:38,049 --> 00:12:39,968 Mac's gay. 623 00:12:38,049 --> 00:12:39,968 Yeah, Mac's gay. 624 00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:42,179 [ Charlie ] 625 00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:42,179 He's gay. Okay, smiles. 626 00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:42,179 Hey! Hey! 627 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:44,598 Hey! What's with all 628 00:12:42,220 --> 00:12:44,598 the chitchat? 629 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:46,308 Legs and hammies 630 00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:46,308 are drying up by the second. 631 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,059 We got stoned 632 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:48,059 and we're uncomfortable. 633 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,687 We're trying to deal 634 00:12:48,101 --> 00:12:49,687 with the whole thing. 635 00:12:49,728 --> 00:12:52,397 You guys need to start 636 00:12:49,728 --> 00:12:52,397 greasing some dudes 637 00:12:49,728 --> 00:12:52,397 or I'm gonna freak out? 638 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:54,274 I'm gonna freak out, 639 00:12:52,439 --> 00:12:54,274 and I'm gonna add another day! 640 00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:56,735 No, no, no. We'll grease, 641 00:12:54,316 --> 00:12:56,735 we'll grease, we'll grease. 642 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,945 Give me the grease. 643 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,945 We'll grease 644 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,945 the dudes and-- 645 00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,447 Okay, that's what I like 646 00:12:58,987 --> 00:13:00,447 to hear. 647 00:13:00,489 --> 00:13:02,700 - But don't blow your wads 648 00:13:00,489 --> 00:13:02,700 on these guys, okay? 649 00:13:00,489 --> 00:13:02,700 - I mean-- 650 00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,117 We still have the karate 651 00:13:02,741 --> 00:13:04,117 tournament. 652 00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,952 We're gonna 653 00:13:04,159 --> 00:13:05,952 watch you fight? 654 00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:10,957 Fight? No. 655 00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:10,957 No, day seven is God's day 656 00:13:05,994 --> 00:13:10,957 of rest and judgment. 657 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,545 So I'm gonna sit back and watch 658 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,545 and judge everybody else 659 00:13:10,999 --> 00:13:14,545 in the tournament. 660 00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:18,340 Hey, Mac. 661 00:13:14,586 --> 00:13:18,340 I'm drying up over here. 662 00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:20,384 Sorry, Big Moe. 663 00:13:18,382 --> 00:13:20,384 Sorry about that. 664 00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:22,969 I'll be right there. 665 00:13:20,425 --> 00:13:22,969 Get to work. Get to work. 666 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:25,096 - Come on. 667 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:25,096 - Yeah, okay. All right. 668 00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:26,598 Yeah. 669 00:13:25,138 --> 00:13:26,598 All right, bud. 670 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:28,933 - He's got the boner again. 671 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:28,933 - Well-- Yeah. Yeah. 672 00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:31,144 Well, at least this time 673 00:13:28,975 --> 00:13:31,144 it makes sense, huh? 674 00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:34,439 All right, listen. 675 00:13:31,186 --> 00:13:34,439 I got an idea. 676 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,407 Ooh, I don't know 677 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,407 about this. 678 00:13:41,154 --> 00:13:43,407 This doesn't feel right. 679 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:46,368 No, this is good. 680 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:46,368 This is gonna be good for him. 681 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:46,368 I promise. This is the only way. 682 00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:48,286 Oh! 683 00:13:46,410 --> 00:13:48,286 Hey. 684 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,872 I got you guys 685 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,872 all notebooks and pens. 686 00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:53,417 We're gonna start with 687 00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:53,417 the yellow belts 'cause 688 00:13:50,914 --> 00:13:53,417 it's an inferior class. 689 00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:55,502 Actually, we've got 690 00:13:53,458 --> 00:13:55,502 a surprise for you, Mac. 691 00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:57,462 Yeah. We signed you up. 692 00:13:55,544 --> 00:13:57,462 You're competing. 693 00:13:57,504 --> 00:14:01,049 - Huh? 694 00:13:57,504 --> 00:14:01,049 - You're gonna go fight a guy. 695 00:13:57,504 --> 00:14:01,049 A black belt actually. 696 00:14:01,091 --> 00:14:04,094 - You're in the tournament. 697 00:14:01,091 --> 00:14:04,094 - No, no, I-I don't think 698 00:14:01,091 --> 00:14:04,094 that's a good idea. 699 00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:05,929 Mostly because I don't have 700 00:14:04,135 --> 00:14:05,929 the right gear, and I'm not-- 701 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,223 - You're wearing a gi. 702 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,223 - You are wearing a gi. 703 00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:10,058 Yeah, that is the gear. 704 00:14:08,265 --> 00:14:10,058 That's the only gear. 705 00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,394 I notice you're also wearing 706 00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,394 a black belt. Now, you are 707 00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:12,394 a black belt, correct? 708 00:14:12,436 --> 00:14:15,272 Um, not technically. 709 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:19,484 Um, only because I haven't 710 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:19,484 subscribed to one... discipline. 711 00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,194 But you are good enough 712 00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,194 to fight in a black belt 713 00:14:19,526 --> 00:14:21,194 tournament. 714 00:14:21,236 --> 00:14:22,529 'Cause you're wearing 715 00:14:21,236 --> 00:14:22,529 a black belt. 716 00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:24,114 Of course. 717 00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:24,114 Shit, Mac, 718 00:14:22,571 --> 00:14:24,114 you can do it. 719 00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:26,199 Just go right for the guy's 720 00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:26,199 throat. 721 00:14:24,155 --> 00:14:26,199 I know I can do it. 722 00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:29,119 That's not the-- I feel like 723 00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:29,119 you're talking a lot 724 00:14:26,241 --> 00:14:29,119 throughout the day. 725 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,247 - I know I can do it. 726 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,247 - So if you can do it, 727 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,247 then do it. 728 00:14:32,289 --> 00:14:34,499 I'll sign up if Mac 729 00:14:32,289 --> 00:14:34,499 doesn't want to. 730 00:14:32,289 --> 00:14:34,499 I'm gonna do it. 731 00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:36,543 I said I was-- 732 00:14:34,541 --> 00:14:36,543 I was never not gonna do it. 733 00:14:36,585 --> 00:14:37,836 I'm excited. 734 00:14:36,585 --> 00:14:37,836 Yeah. 735 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,630 I-I'm really excited 736 00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:39,630 to see this, man. 737 00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,966 You are gonna kick 738 00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,966 that guy's ass, whoever he is. 739 00:14:47,137 --> 00:14:49,473 [ Imitating Wind Whipping ] 740 00:14:49,514 --> 00:14:51,391 [ Exhaling ] 741 00:14:54,227 --> 00:14:56,730 [ Exhales ] 742 00:14:56,772 --> 00:14:58,898 This is cruel. 743 00:14:56,772 --> 00:14:58,898 Oof. 744 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:00,900 - I can't watch it, you know? 745 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:00,900 - [ Dennis ] Trust me, this is 746 00:14:58,940 --> 00:15:00,900 for his own good. 747 00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:02,778 If he doesn't face this now, 748 00:15:00,942 --> 00:15:02,778 he never will. 749 00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:04,946 Yeah, it's too bad, but he's 750 00:15:02,820 --> 00:15:04,946 got to get his ass kicked. 751 00:15:04,988 --> 00:15:06,657 Yep. It's time 752 00:15:04,988 --> 00:15:06,657 for this to end. 753 00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,702 - Hi. 754 00:15:08,158 --> 00:15:10,702 - Okay, now bow. 755 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:14,665 Not to me, Karate Kid, 756 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:14,665 to him. 757 00:15:12,412 --> 00:15:14,665 Oh. 758 00:15:15,707 --> 00:15:17,375 Bow. 759 00:15:15,707 --> 00:15:17,375 Bow. 760 00:15:18,710 --> 00:15:21,087 Ready. Fight! 761 00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:22,922 [ Audience Chattering ] 762 00:15:22,964 --> 00:15:24,842 - [ Karate Yell ] 763 00:15:22,964 --> 00:15:24,842 - [ Screams ] 764 00:15:24,883 --> 00:15:26,551 Block, point, Mac! 765 00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:30,180 - Shit. 766 00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:30,180 - Guys, did you see that? 767 00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:30,180 I got a point! I got a point! 768 00:15:30,221 --> 00:15:31,682 [ Grunts ] 769 00:15:31,723 --> 00:15:33,391 [ All ] 770 00:15:31,723 --> 00:15:33,391 Ooh! 771 00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,059 Whoa! 772 00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,059 Hell, no. 773 00:15:41,441 --> 00:15:43,026 [ Indistinct Shouting ] 774 00:15:43,067 --> 00:15:44,110 Oh! 775 00:15:44,152 --> 00:15:47,030 [ Grunting, Shouting ] 776 00:15:47,071 --> 00:15:47,947 [ Screams ] 777 00:15:47,989 --> 00:15:51,034 [ Country Mac Yelling ] 778 00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:56,247 [ Yelling ] 779 00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:02,295 [ Laughing ] 780 00:16:02,337 --> 00:16:04,715 That was badass! 781 00:16:02,337 --> 00:16:04,715 He kicked 782 00:16:02,337 --> 00:16:04,715 the shit out of that guy! 783 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:08,593 Well, I got the actual point. 784 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:08,593 Who cares? You lost. 785 00:16:04,756 --> 00:16:08,593 Country Mac won. 786 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,847 Yeah, but it's about 787 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,847 the art, okay? 788 00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,847 Oh, the art. 789 00:16:11,889 --> 00:16:14,933 You got your ass kicked. 790 00:16:11,889 --> 00:16:14,933 That's what happened. 791 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:19,229 I scored an actual point in an 792 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:19,229 actual karate tournament and 793 00:16:14,974 --> 00:16:19,229 against an actual black belt. 794 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:22,440 Country Mac beat the shit 795 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:22,440 out of that guy with a beer 796 00:16:19,270 --> 00:16:22,440 and his T-shirt. 797 00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,693 Yeah, and where 798 00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,693 is he always getting 799 00:16:22,482 --> 00:16:24,693 those beers, man? 800 00:16:24,735 --> 00:16:27,278 That's the most 801 00:16:24,735 --> 00:16:27,278 badass thing about-- 802 00:16:24,735 --> 00:16:27,278 Out of the blue, he gets a beer. 803 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,030 No, it's years of training 804 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,030 finally paying off, 805 00:16:29,072 --> 00:16:31,700 and an uncontested 806 00:16:29,072 --> 00:16:31,700 black belt point 807 00:16:29,072 --> 00:16:31,700 is the most badass-- 808 00:16:31,742 --> 00:16:34,202 Oh, my God, we're never 809 00:16:31,742 --> 00:16:34,202 gonna hear the end of this. 810 00:16:31,742 --> 00:16:34,202 Stop, stop! 811 00:16:34,244 --> 00:16:37,997 Hold on a second, Mac. 812 00:16:34,244 --> 00:16:37,997 No, no. Listen, you got 813 00:16:34,244 --> 00:16:37,997 your ass kicked today. 814 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,250 That's what happened, 815 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,250 plain and simple. 816 00:16:38,039 --> 00:16:40,250 So I want you to admit it. 817 00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:42,085 Dennis, don't. 818 00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:42,085 The day's almost over. 819 00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:42,085 We only have a couple of hours. 820 00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:44,546 No, no, no, Dee, 821 00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:44,546 we have a lifetime of this 822 00:16:42,126 --> 00:16:44,546 to look forward to, 823 00:16:44,588 --> 00:16:46,172 and I for one 824 00:16:44,588 --> 00:16:46,172 can't stand it. 825 00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:48,842 You are not a badass, pal. 826 00:16:46,214 --> 00:16:48,842 Admit it to us right now. 827 00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:51,302 - Get on your knees! 828 00:16:48,884 --> 00:16:51,302 - You are not a badass! 829 00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,264 - Oh, my God! 830 00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,264 - Hey, what's wrong 831 00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,264 with you, guy? 832 00:16:54,305 --> 00:16:55,557 You got a problem? 833 00:16:55,599 --> 00:16:57,183 You got the problem, asshole. 834 00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:58,476 [ Country Mac ] 835 00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:58,476 Look out! 836 00:16:57,225 --> 00:16:58,476 [ Dee Gasps ] 837 00:16:58,518 --> 00:16:59,561 Shit. 838 00:16:59,603 --> 00:17:01,312 You bring a knife 839 00:16:59,603 --> 00:17:01,312 to a fight, 840 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,314 you better be ready 841 00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:03,314 to use it, you jabroni. 842 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:07,110 Just... don't come back here, 843 00:17:04,649 --> 00:17:07,110 you punks. 844 00:17:08,737 --> 00:17:10,488 Aw, you made him look 845 00:17:08,737 --> 00:17:10,488 like a bitch! 846 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:13,324 Holy shit. 847 00:17:10,530 --> 00:17:13,324 Nice, very nice. 848 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,201 Oh, you are badass, dude. 849 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,201 How'd you know he had 850 00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,201 a knife on him? 851 00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:18,329 I gave him an ocular pat down. 852 00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:18,329 Assessed the threat level. 853 00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,498 Clocked a knife in his boot. 854 00:17:20,540 --> 00:17:22,584 Huh! Holy shit. 855 00:17:22,626 --> 00:17:24,252 [ Charlie Whoops And Chuckles ] 856 00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:26,797 Guys, I may have had a little 857 00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:26,797 bit of an accident in my pants, 858 00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:28,632 so I think I got 859 00:17:26,838 --> 00:17:28,632 to change out of this gi. 860 00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:31,217 He just gave that guy 861 00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:31,217 an ocular pat down, 862 00:17:28,673 --> 00:17:31,217 and it actually worked. 863 00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:34,679 - It worked. 864 00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:34,679 - He made a lucky guess, 865 00:17:31,259 --> 00:17:34,679 and he put us all in danger. 866 00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:36,723 You made a poopy 867 00:17:34,721 --> 00:17:36,723 in your pants! 868 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,683 Did anybody else 869 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,683 do a poo-poo in their pants? 870 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:38,683 No. Of course not. 871 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:40,477 This is 872 00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:40,477 our head of security! 873 00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:43,021 I don't need to listen 874 00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:43,021 to this, okay? I'm gonna 875 00:17:40,518 --> 00:17:43,021 change out of this gi... 876 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,940 and then we're gonna 877 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,940 keep going 878 00:17:43,062 --> 00:17:44,940 with the day, okay? 879 00:17:44,982 --> 00:17:47,859 I have a series of lectures 880 00:17:44,982 --> 00:17:47,859 that we're gonna get to. 881 00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,486 Go get the poop 882 00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:49,486 out of your pants. 883 00:17:49,527 --> 00:17:51,529 I can't wait for the 884 00:17:49,527 --> 00:17:51,529 lectures. Goddamn, man. 885 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:55,575 The guy is in complete denial 886 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:55,575 about absolutely every aspect 887 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:55,575 of his life. 888 00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:57,243 And there is nothing 889 00:17:55,617 --> 00:17:57,243 we can do about it. 890 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,704 - I say we switch him out. 891 00:17:57,285 --> 00:17:59,704 - Huh? 892 00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,790 Country Mac 893 00:17:59,746 --> 00:18:01,790 for Paddy's Mac. 894 00:18:01,832 --> 00:18:04,626 We send Mac to the country, 895 00:18:01,832 --> 00:18:04,626 bring Country Mac here. 896 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:06,252 Yeah, to the bar. 897 00:18:04,668 --> 00:18:06,252 That's not a bad idea. 898 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:08,672 I mean, look, we'd be safer 899 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:08,672 with an actual badass 900 00:18:06,294 --> 00:18:08,672 in the bar. 901 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,174 And we might actually become 902 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,174 a little bit more badass 903 00:18:08,713 --> 00:18:11,174 ourselves. 904 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,010 We would become 905 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,010 more like Country Mac, 906 00:18:11,215 --> 00:18:13,010 which'd be great. 907 00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,261 We have a lot 908 00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,261 to learn from him. 909 00:18:13,051 --> 00:18:15,261 We should all get motorcycles. 910 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:18,306 - And drink much more beer. 911 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:18,306 - And smoke more weed, 912 00:18:15,303 --> 00:18:18,306 you guys. 913 00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:21,351 Get in fights and do all those 914 00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:21,351 things. Can we make this happen 915 00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:21,351 before he comes back out...? 916 00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:24,521 Hey, um, hey, Country Mac, 917 00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:24,521 can we just talk to you 918 00:18:21,392 --> 00:18:24,521 for one quick second, buddy? 919 00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:28,692 Um, listen, we were just talking 920 00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:28,692 and, man, we sure would like 921 00:18:24,562 --> 00:18:28,692 for you to stay with us. 922 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,902 I mean, like-like, 923 00:18:28,733 --> 00:18:30,902 stay with us forever. 924 00:18:30,944 --> 00:18:33,571 Will you be part of our gang? 925 00:18:30,944 --> 00:18:33,571 Yep. 926 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:37,617 Uh, just "yep"? 927 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:37,617 Just, like-- 928 00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:37,617 That's it? 929 00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,661 You're not gonna give a speech 930 00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,661 or lecture us or anything 931 00:18:37,659 --> 00:18:39,661 like that? 932 00:18:39,703 --> 00:18:42,080 No bossiness? 933 00:18:39,703 --> 00:18:42,080 No pontificating? 934 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:46,918 It's not my style. 935 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:46,918 I just go with the flow. 936 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,419 Let the wind blow 937 00:18:46,960 --> 00:18:48,419 through my hair. 938 00:18:48,461 --> 00:18:50,755 Yeah. 939 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,966 [ Engine Starts ] 940 00:18:50,797 --> 00:18:52,966 Oh, wow. 941 00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:55,802 I love that guy. 942 00:18:53,008 --> 00:18:55,802 Aw, look at him go. 943 00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:58,722 - [ Frank ] 944 00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:58,722 He's really badass. 945 00:18:55,844 --> 00:18:58,722 - Where's he even going? 946 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:02,225 I mean, the fact that 947 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:02,225 we don't know where he's going 948 00:18:58,763 --> 00:19:02,225 makes him all the more badass. 949 00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:05,478 [ Charlie ] 950 00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:05,478 Uh-oh. Whoops. 951 00:19:03,852 --> 00:19:05,478 [ Dee ] Whoopsie. 952 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,064 He fell, huh? 953 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,064 Tipped over 954 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,064 a little bit. 955 00:19:07,105 --> 00:19:09,482 Ooh. 956 00:19:07,105 --> 00:19:09,482 He's probably okay, 957 00:19:07,105 --> 00:19:09,482 though, right? 958 00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:11,359 [ Dee ] 959 00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:11,359 Well, yeah, he just... 960 00:19:09,524 --> 00:19:11,359 popped over. 961 00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,987 A little-little bump. 962 00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,987 He's fine. He's good, he's good, 963 00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,987 he's good, he's good. 964 00:19:14,029 --> 00:19:16,614 ♪♪ [ Bagpipes: "Amazing Grace" ] 965 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:22,495 Country Mac lived 966 00:19:19,158 --> 00:19:22,495 a reckless life. 967 00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:28,459 He wasn't the kind of guy 968 00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:28,459 that could score a point 969 00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:28,459 in a black belt karate contest. 970 00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,964 And it turns out, 971 00:19:30,461 --> 00:19:32,964 he was totally queer. 972 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:36,259 Which, as we all know, 973 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:36,259 is a sin. 974 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:42,849 And that, coupled with his 975 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:42,849 radical religious beliefs, has 976 00:19:36,300 --> 00:19:42,849 most likely landed him in hell, 977 00:19:42,891 --> 00:19:45,936 where he will burn 978 00:19:42,891 --> 00:19:45,936 for all eternity. 979 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:49,397 So I will ask 980 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:49,397 for a moment of silence, 981 00:19:45,977 --> 00:19:49,397 in which I will beg... 982 00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:56,279 God's forgiveness 983 00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:56,279 for Country Mac's evil, 984 00:19:49,439 --> 00:19:56,279 homo ways, 985 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:59,157 while simultaneously 986 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:59,157 doing a series 987 00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:59,157 of karate moves... 988 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,868 that I know Country Mac 989 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:01,868 would've enjoyed so much. 990 00:20:01,910 --> 00:20:04,495 ♪♪ [ Continues ] 991 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,790 [ Imitates Wind Whipping ] 992 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,459 Well, guys, I think 993 00:20:06,831 --> 00:20:09,459 the real lesson here is that... 994 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:11,836 there's nothing badass 995 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:11,836 about riding a motorcycle 996 00:20:09,500 --> 00:20:11,836 without a helmet. 997 00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:14,631 - Right. 998 00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:14,631 - Plus, he was drunk 999 00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:14,631 all the time. 1000 00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:17,216 - Yeah. 1001 00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:17,216 - You know what's badass? 1002 00:20:14,672 --> 00:20:17,216 Being alive. 1003 00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:20,678 Yeah. So, uh, what do we do 1004 00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:20,678 about this guy? 1005 00:20:20,720 --> 00:20:24,182 [ Wind Whipping Continues ] 1006 00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:28,061 Namaste. Namaste. 1007 00:20:28,103 --> 00:20:32,190 Okay, we will now pile 1008 00:20:28,103 --> 00:20:32,190 into the car, where we will go 1009 00:20:28,103 --> 00:20:32,190 to the countryside... 1010 00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:35,193 to leave Country Mac's ashes 1011 00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:35,193 in a place 1012 00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:35,193 that he loved so well. 1013 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:41,407 Actually, we won't. 1014 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:41,407 Because it's officially 1015 00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:41,407 Frank Day, so-- 1016 00:20:41,449 --> 00:20:44,828 [ Toilet Flushing ] 1017 00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:47,747 All right, Pee Country Mac. 1018 00:21:23,908 --> 00:21:26,786 [ Voices Speaking Backwards ] 60386