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www.fmsubs.com
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N / A?
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Are you so happy too?
4
00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:49,240
Yes!
5
00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:51,160
I am very happy.
6
00:00:51,240 --> 00:00:55,560
Since I used the old tracksuits
by Jean-Claude Juncker.
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00:00:57,120 --> 00:00:58,640
That's what you have to do first:
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00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:02,560
Decisions that you as head of government
from Luxembourg,
9
00:01:02,640 --> 00:01:07,720
then as EU-Chef-Kommissionheini
to ban again
10
00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:10,040
that is a spectrum in the head ...
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00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:16,000
If you do not even have more
committed to your own mind ...
12
00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:19,200
... there you are free.
13
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:24,760
By the way, that's a real straitjacket.
People always ask.
14
00:01:24,840 --> 00:01:27,880
In Germany they are prohibited
because of human rights.
15
00:01:27,960 --> 00:01:29,680
This is considered a deprivation of liberty.
16
00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,080
In America you get it without problems.
17
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At least since Guantanamo Bay, we know
18
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that the Americans do that
with human rights and deprivation of liberty
19
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not quite as tight.
20
00:01:42,240 --> 00:01:44,600
When I
in the asylum still had to wear ...
21
00:01:46,800 --> 00:01:50,480
... there they are with me
Memory Tourette diagnosed.
22
00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:56,160
My dad had already
this is a family disease.
23
00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:59,240
In my memory
they are all assholes and idiots.
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00:01:59,960 --> 00:02:03,400
I can not control that
it's like a cold in my head.
25
00:02:03,480 --> 00:02:06,280
Sometimes my thoughts hiss
into the head,
26
00:02:06,360 --> 00:02:08,800
and I can not control it.
27
00:02:08,880 --> 00:02:12,080
When I lit you in the beginning,
I thought:
28
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:15,200
"Who in this room
pinching his ass
29
00:02:15,280 --> 00:02:16,360
because he has to fart? "
30
00:02:18,760 --> 00:02:21,040
I find the idea very fascinating.
31
00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:22,920
That a human being in this room
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00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:27,400
meanwhile his whole concentration
has focused on his sphincter.
33
00:02:28,520 --> 00:02:31,400
He does not get along anymore,
what happens up front.
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00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:36,320
For him, yes
Survival technically very important questions.
35
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:41,000
"Should I or not?
36
00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:45,040
And if yes,
in spurts or as a whole? "
37
00:02:47,240 --> 00:02:48,400
If you got it,
38
00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:51,320
that we humans are so crazy
like Wiener schnitzel,
39
00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:53,800
then life becomes easy.
40
00:02:55,040 --> 00:03:00,080
Yes, you have to do this crazy thing
consciously bring in your own life.
41
00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:04,160
You have to get to the point
where all people around you think:
42
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:06,520
"He does not tick clean."
43
00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:11,600
And you will notice you have
suddenly a new form of freedom.
44
00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:16,240
I'm from Holland.
45
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:21,040
People always ask:
"What is it like growing up in Holland?
46
00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,960
What is such a childhood?
4 m below sea level? "
47
00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:26,400
Earlier, at 18, 19,
48
00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:29,480
we are not on the weekend
went to the disco.
49
00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:32,600
We have the weekend
smoked a bit of hash
50
00:03:32,680 --> 00:03:35,000
and then watched radio for hours.
51
00:03:40,080 --> 00:03:41,760
In color!
52
00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,120
That's a typical prejudice, right?
53
00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:48,080
Everyone says: "The Dutch are smoking.
54
00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:52,200
So if a kifft, then the!
Everything stupid, these Dutchmen! "
55
00:03:52,280 --> 00:03:54,520
It was a few years ago
a study,
56
00:03:54,600 --> 00:04:01,440
in which nation in Europe really
most marijuana is consumed.
57
00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:05,040
And do you know who won?
58
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:07,800
Switzerland!
59
00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,600
And honestly,
we always guessed it!
60
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:14,600
Yes, come.
Alone, how the greet!
61
00:04:18,720 --> 00:04:20,480
"Hello!
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00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:25,040
Do you know where the goat peter is? "
63
00:04:25,720 --> 00:04:28,920
Yes, sure,
he's a drug-Erwin with Kiffer-Franz.
64
00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:31,800
The Swiss reacted.
65
00:04:31,880 --> 00:04:34,480
There is now
a Swiss knife with a hookah.
66
00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:38,800
The Swiss must be stoners,
Naturally.
67
00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:43,480
Naturally,
the Swiss must be stoners.
68
00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:46,680
Or how different
can you explain Toblerone?
69
00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:51,360
A chocolate,
70
00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:54,840
with you
the front teeth can break out.
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00:04:57,600 --> 00:04:59,640
"Great, now we've stinked for 20 years,
72
00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:02,600
now we need
the front teeth no longer! "
73
00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:07,760
Or the Swiss knife.
74
00:05:08,880 --> 00:05:12,400
Do you know
any other army in this world,
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00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:16,560
who goes to war with a knife,
76
00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:20,000
where a corkscrew
and a screwdriver's turn?
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00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:32,880
What did they want to do
78
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:35,520
dismantle the cabinets
and pour the wine?
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00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:39,160
"Great, we are at war again!
Gluck, luck, happy. "
80
00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:43,040
The Swiss must be stoners,
Naturally.
81
00:05:44,720 --> 00:05:47,200
The Swiss are funny anyway.
82
00:05:47,280 --> 00:05:48,440
But.
83
00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:53,520
20 years ago, the Swiss have
Scientists mixed with philosophers.
84
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,200
That is very dangerous.
85
00:05:55,280 --> 00:05:58,560
But they have
a very interesting experiment.
86
00:05:58,640 --> 00:06:01,720
They went to villages
and talked to the people.
87
00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:04,400
The philosophers
were in search of morality.
88
00:06:04,480 --> 00:06:06,200
They said in the villages:
89
00:06:06,280 --> 00:06:10,520
"With you here in the village we have to
make a repository for nuclear waste. "
90
00:06:11,320 --> 00:06:13,560
More than half of the respondents said:
91
00:06:13,640 --> 00:06:17,800
"Yes, that's stupid
but I know it has to go somewhere.
92
00:06:17,880 --> 00:06:19,440
Then that's how it is."
93
00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:22,000
And in other villages they said:
94
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:25,440
"We have to go here
make a repository for nuclear waste.
95
00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:29,800
But once a year you get
10% of your annual salary as compensation. "
96
00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,040
Suddenly wanted
over half the people do not do that anymore.
97
00:06:34,840 --> 00:06:38,360
They did not want that.
They researched morality.
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00:06:38,440 --> 00:06:41,200
One has 20 months old children
locked in a room
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00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:42,680
with an adult.
100
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:44,480
The adult drops something.
101
00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:48,520
More than half of the children go,
pick it up and give it to the adult.
102
00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:50,840
Then they rewarded the kids for it.
103
00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:54,240
And suddenly
they did not pick them up anymore.
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00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,560
The more you reward, the less ...
105
00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:58,520
And what do we learn from this?
106
00:07:00,040 --> 00:07:02,040
Man in himself is good.
107
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:08,120
Man in himself is morally good.
As long as he does not get a reward.
108
00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:12,560
So we can do the discussion
end up with bonus payments for managers.
109
00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,400
We never have to talk about it again.
110
00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:18,480
The Swiss knew it, of course.
111
00:07:21,120 --> 00:07:23,040
I am a bit manic.
112
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:26,000
I have to have the stovetops
always make five times,
113
00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:28,960
Always wipe chairs,
that is very important to me.
114
00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:31,720
That's a ritual.
Besides, the hand of it gets warm.
115
00:07:33,000 --> 00:07:36,280
It's important: for political cabaret
you need a chair.
116
00:07:36,360 --> 00:07:41,240
The chair is almost the Ed Hardy T-shirt
the political cabaret artist.
117
00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:44,120
Yes, because if you ...
118
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:47,360
... sitting in such a chair ...
119
00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:54,720
... get suddenly
even extremely thin texts ...
120
00:07:56,960 --> 00:07:58,240
... such a meta-level.
121
00:07:59,960 --> 00:08:03,800
You can sit in such a chair
and tell the biggest shit.
122
00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:06,000
People always think ...
123
00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,320
"Nah,
124
00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:12,200
there is more behind it. "
125
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,680
I can show you this.
126
00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:20,280
This is a butterfly.
127
00:08:22,200 --> 00:08:24,400
He always sits in the glass.
128
00:08:25,680 --> 00:08:27,800
He knows nothing else.
129
00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:33,159
That's his world.
He does not come out there either.
130
00:08:36,159 --> 00:08:39,280
It is a pity,
because it is hermetically sealed at the top.
131
00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:44,000
He usually does not do it anymore
as two, three days.
132
00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,000
My name is Ursula von der Leyen.
133
00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:54,080
Zack.
134
00:08:55,080 --> 00:08:56,640
Meta-level.
135
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:03,840
But we always need idiots,
which we chase through the revolving door.
136
00:09:03,920 --> 00:09:07,360
We always need such an asshole,
what we through the village ...
137
00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:08,640
We need one.
138
00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:10,920
They always race then
through such a revolving door.
139
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:14,800
Since the Niebel goes out,
That's where the Brüderle comes in,
140
00:09:14,880 --> 00:09:17,520
then comes the Wulff
from the other direction,
141
00:09:17,600 --> 00:09:22,320
then the Seehofer comes closely followed
by Alexander Dobrindt through the revolving door.
142
00:09:22,400 --> 00:09:25,120
That's how they always run
through the revolving door.
143
00:09:25,200 --> 00:09:27,400
And the revolving door is called Angela Merkel.
144
00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:34,360
And so we always have topics like that,
who occupy us so three weeks,
145
00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:36,600
and then we discuss like the madmen
146
00:09:36,680 --> 00:09:39,600
and always have
such a roaring in the head of discussing,
147
00:09:39,680 --> 00:09:43,120
because we always
to discuss these topics,
148
00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,160
and then it's over again.
149
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,960
Then comes a new asshole.
150
00:09:50,560 --> 00:09:52,000
But well.
151
00:09:52,760 --> 00:09:56,760
As long as at the end of the month of the Dispo
remains reasonably in balance ...
152
00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:01,280
... and enough money at the end of the year
for a new flatscreen is there
153
00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,440
and the sports show
continues at 18 o'clock,
154
00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:05,440
I do not give a damn.
155
00:10:06,840 --> 00:10:12,320
The current catering rate
for a child under Hartz IV
156
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:16,000
for food and drink a day
is EUR 3.02.
157
00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:18,600
For a child.
158
00:10:18,680 --> 00:10:21,320
For good food and drink.
159
00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:28,000
The current catering rate
for a police dog ...
160
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:31,720
... is EUR 6.80 per day.
161
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,040
If you can do it now ...
162
00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:43,320
... to train your child to the police dog ...
163
00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,760
... are also scarce EUR 10.
164
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,880
I do not feel like
all these discussions ...
165
00:10:54,960 --> 00:10:58,160
I'm only looking at Exclusiv now.
166
00:10:59,640 --> 00:11:02,080
With Frauke Ludowig.
167
00:11:02,160 --> 00:11:03,320
I look.
168
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,520
But.
Prince William and Kate are pregnant.
169
00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,880
At least two
have used the summer to Poppen.
170
00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:16,760
The rest was world champion.
171
00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:31,440
That was really stupid
for Prince Harry, right?
172
00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:35,040
He always slides on
down the throne.
173
00:11:35,120 --> 00:11:37,040
He is already on a par
174
00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:40,520
with Princess Lillifee
and Kevin-Prince Boateng.
175
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:45,600
I like Frauke Ludowig,
she has great topics.
176
00:11:45,680 --> 00:11:47,560
She also found out
177
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:51,160
that women
ten days a year are in a bad mood.
178
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:53,840
But.
179
00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:56,160
That's what they showed with movies:
180
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:59,760
Women are ten days a year
bad mood.
181
00:12:01,240 --> 00:12:05,760
But why must Veronica Ferres
shoot their films in these ten days?
182
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,880
But so topics help in forgetting.
183
00:12:18,840 --> 00:12:22,320
I can not get over it.
I do not understand it anymore.
184
00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:24,520
Have a look,
185
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:27,440
there is actually
only bad news
186
00:12:27,520 --> 00:12:31,120
from bad-tempered people
in badly fitting suits.
187
00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:34,080
I'd wish,
Claus Kleber would say:
188
00:12:34,160 --> 00:12:35,960
"Good evening to today's journal,
189
00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:39,040
today was nothing,
not even the weather, good night. "
190
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:41,640
Does not come.
191
00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:44,560
I do not remember,
who is good and evil.
192
00:12:44,640 --> 00:12:46,760
That was so easy in the past.
193
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:50,400
I used to know:
The Ami good, the Russian evil.
194
00:12:51,840 --> 00:12:53,400
Nutella good,
195
00:12:53,480 --> 00:12:55,000
Nusspli evil.
196
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:58,200
It's not that easy anymore.
197
00:12:58,280 --> 00:13:02,320
Barack Obama is a trusted person
and Nobel Peace Prize Laureates.
198
00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:03,840
But a confidant,
199
00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:07,880
which has spied half the world
and still operates Guantanamo Bay.
200
00:13:08,680 --> 00:13:10,840
2009 to take office
he said,
201
00:13:10,920 --> 00:13:13,840
he becomes Guantanamo Bay
close within a year.
202
00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:16,680
The thing still exists.
203
00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:19,200
The only thing he has closed
is the office,
204
00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:22,280
that with the resolution
commissioned by Guantanamo Bay.
205
00:13:24,440 --> 00:13:28,120
And there are still people
the 24 hours a day
206
00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,560
sitting in such a jacket on Guantanamo.
207
00:13:31,560 --> 00:13:34,520
They sit 24 hours
in just such a jacket.
208
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,880
And that's not open, that's too.
209
00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:41,480
But we do not discuss that
about human rights.
210
00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:46,400
And in this unreflected wave
the enthusiasm
211
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:49,960
you have him in 2009 too
awarded the Nobel Peace Prize.
212
00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:51,600
After being two days earlier
213
00:13:51,680 --> 00:13:55,360
30,000 men and women in the war
sent to Afghanistan.
214
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:59,800
He would have
rather need to get an Oscar.
215
00:14:00,680 --> 00:14:03,560
Barack Obama the Nobel Peace Prize
to lend is like this,
216
00:14:03,640 --> 00:14:06,240
as if you were the assassin
of September 11, 2001
217
00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:09,640
later
to award a city planning prize.
218
00:14:15,560 --> 00:14:17,520
Yes, that is not so outrageous.
219
00:14:18,280 --> 00:14:22,240
Mohammed Atta, one of the assassins,
studied urban planning in Hamburg.
220
00:14:24,160 --> 00:14:26,200
He always said that back then:
221
00:14:27,080 --> 00:14:29,640
"I'll do something with houses later."
222
00:14:32,400 --> 00:14:34,760
I can also
Merkel no longer trust.
223
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:38,440
That's too often
yourself expressed confidence.
224
00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:43,000
You can not give it away like that.
I can no longer trust Merkel.
225
00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:45,240
And now she does not like America anymore.
226
00:14:45,320 --> 00:14:49,480
Something must have happened.
She does not like America anymore.
227
00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:52,040
It used to be once a year
flown to America
228
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,680
and has a speech
held in front of the US Congress.
229
00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:57,240
The Congress
is completely disengaged each time.
230
00:14:57,320 --> 00:14:59,800
There she has
Standing ovations got in America.
231
00:14:59,880 --> 00:15:03,320
But in the speeches she has too
Cut out sentences like:
232
00:15:03,400 --> 00:15:06,480
"Even as a little girl in the GDR ...
233
00:15:07,680 --> 00:15:11,280
... I dreamed
from a certain jeans from America. "
234
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:17,520
And that's why Angela is still wearing it today
in homage to the Americans
235
00:15:17,600 --> 00:15:19,760
Krusty's old jackets for the clown.
236
00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:23,120
That only makes for the Americans.
237
00:15:24,840 --> 00:15:26,120
And...
238
00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:30,640
I want me now
do not stop with appearances,
239
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,400
but can anyone explain to me
how did this costume come about?
240
00:15:34,480 --> 00:15:36,120
It has to be somewhere in Berlin
241
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:39,200
such a crazy political advisor
give,
242
00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:42,800
the morning at nine
started with whiskey cola.
243
00:15:46,240 --> 00:15:48,240
"Do you know what, Mrs. Merkel?
244
00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:50,840
Such a red jacket
245
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,400
with big, white buttons
246
00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:58,320
looks very statesmanlike. "
247
00:15:59,920 --> 00:16:04,120
It's just a matter of time,
until she has such big shoes on.
248
00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:07,280
"I am your head of state."
249
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:09,600
I can not trust him anymore.
250
00:16:14,080 --> 00:16:17,440
I always thought
the ADAC would be a serious club.
251
00:16:18,640 --> 00:16:22,760
But there are even the Hells Angels
set up more transparent.
252
00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:28,200
They have voting results
and voter turnout so radically fake
253
00:16:28,280 --> 00:16:30,880
there even has
Kim Jong-red ears got.
254
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,240
I do not know,
whom i can still trust.
255
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,280
Bayern, because I always thought:
256
00:16:41,360 --> 00:16:44,920
"Okay, those are ass violins,
but they do an honest job. "
257
00:16:45,000 --> 00:16:47,160
But the Hoeness is a tax fraudster,
258
00:16:47,240 --> 00:16:51,360
Rummenigge was with a handful
unpaid Rolex caught at the airport,
259
00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:54,760
and a center-back
is in jail for arson.
260
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:57,360
If they continue like this,
261
00:16:57,440 --> 00:17:00,440
have that soon
more convicted than national player.
262
00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:04,640
The thing about Hoeneß is incredible.
You can not explain soberly.
263
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:06,760
He has evaded EUR 30 million in taxes
264
00:17:06,839 --> 00:17:09,680
and still is
celebrated as a national hero.
265
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:11,720
You can not explain that to anyone.
266
00:17:16,240 --> 00:17:20,000
And now he's in jail.
And that's right.
267
00:17:20,079 --> 00:17:22,520
For two reasons.
First, it is fair.
268
00:17:22,599 --> 00:17:25,560
And second, I'm happy
on the stupid glances of Bavaria,
269
00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:29,760
if the jail crew of the JVA Landsberg
the next Champions League wins.
270
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:33,760
I'm looking forward to.
271
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,920
I do not understand any of this.
272
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:43,320
I do not know anymore,
whom to trust.
273
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:46,000
I'm watching Exclusiv.
274
00:17:47,840 --> 00:17:49,480
Then at least the world is right.
275
00:17:49,560 --> 00:17:52,800
Who else can you ...
Yes, well, you can rely on the Gauck.
276
00:17:53,160 --> 00:17:55,600
But, since the Gauck itself
set in the head,
277
00:17:55,680 --> 00:17:59,440
that German soldiers are finally back
to be shot at the front,
278
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:01,320
he is very clear in the head.
279
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:05,360
He is now the president of freedom
by military means.
280
00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:08,560
"We bring you
Democracy with the bazooka. "
281
00:18:08,640 --> 00:18:11,600
He has very fast
forget his own story.
282
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,840
But he wants to fight properly.
He wants the tanks back to the front.
283
00:18:16,920 --> 00:18:19,600
And that has always worked well,
we know that.
284
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:23,480
Since we have the experience.
But well, what do you expect?
285
00:18:23,560 --> 00:18:26,920
Just because of a year on Sundays
the blue preached from the sky
286
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:30,320
and later sorted Stasi files,
does not mean that
287
00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:34,280
that he is intellectually capable
to be a good head of state.
288
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,600
Just because one talks a lot about Jesus,
289
00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:40,080
does not mean that,
that he is too.
290
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,360
Who should I trust?
291
00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:51,960
I always used to
familiar with advertising.
292
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,480
It always meant
Cats would buy Whiskas.
293
00:18:56,560 --> 00:19:00,160
For weeks I stood in the supermarket.
There was not a cat!
294
00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:02,920
Meanwhile, I also know why.
295
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:06,360
A cat with a minimum wage job
Whiskas can not afford.
296
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:09,520
I do not know,
whom i should still trust.
297
00:19:09,600 --> 00:19:11,280
I do not understand it anymore.
298
00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:15,080
Whenever I hear this news,
I have such a roaring in my head.
299
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:17,800
It is such a permanent flood
of information.
300
00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:21,280
The Barack is evil, Putin is evil,
the Hoeneß is in jail,
301
00:19:21,360 --> 00:19:24,760
and you have permanent
always such a roar.
302
00:19:24,840 --> 00:19:27,720
Then we deliver suddenly
Weapons to the Kurds.
303
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,800
Because of this ISIS,
then we deliver weapons.
304
00:19:30,880 --> 00:19:32,800
I wonder, who controls?
305
00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:35,720
We deliver weapons and do not know
where they arrive.
306
00:19:36,400 --> 00:19:37,800
And then we wonder,
307
00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:40,520
if the same cannons
are in the hands of the PKK
308
00:19:40,600 --> 00:19:42,960
and marching in the direction of Turkey.
309
00:19:43,040 --> 00:19:45,160
That's not so incredible.
310
00:19:45,240 --> 00:19:48,680
2009 were in Afghanistan
the Americans suddenly
311
00:19:48,760 --> 00:19:51,480
from the Taliban
shot at with their own ammunition.
312
00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:54,360
We can not control that
what we deliver there.
313
00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:57,440
But there are
no public discussion about it.
314
00:19:57,520 --> 00:20:00,280
It is said
There are a few dingoes going over there
315
00:20:00,360 --> 00:20:04,200
and some old Walther P1 pistols,
316
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:08,040
which one only in Germany
may carry for protocol purposes,
317
00:20:08,120 --> 00:20:10,320
because they shoot inaccurately.
318
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,800
That means later collateral damage.
319
00:20:15,240 --> 00:20:16,600
I am waiting for the day
320
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:20,360
where the first jihadists
driving through Dinslaken with such a dingo,
321
00:20:20,440 --> 00:20:22,480
in search of unbelievers.
322
00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,800
On incredulous faces
they will definitely meet.
323
00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,200
We can not control that.
324
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:34,720
We just do not know
what we do there.
325
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,320
And the Bundeswehr
is in a desolate state.
326
00:20:37,400 --> 00:20:41,280
Even the Geissens have more
intact helicopter as the Bundeswehr.
327
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:46,680
We react yes
on the military level of Legoland.
328
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,320
We need people now,
329
00:20:48,400 --> 00:20:51,480
dealing with a desolate material situation
know.
330
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:56,720
We would need specialist staff now.
I would swear the Ludolfs.
331
00:20:57,760 --> 00:20:59,160
But.
332
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:05,240
We do not know at all
what we do there.
333
00:21:06,960 --> 00:21:09,800
Deliver weapons and do not know
what we do.
334
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:14,760
Then Günther Jauch discusses
there the opinions are exchanged,
335
00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:17,200
and then the monkey is dead again.
336
00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:19,040
Then comes the next asshole.
337
00:21:20,120 --> 00:21:23,160
We no longer have an overview,
no chance.
338
00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:26,360
No chance at all. Of course not.
339
00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:29,000
But good.
340
00:21:29,920 --> 00:21:33,720
As long as at the end of the month of the Dispo
remains reasonably in balance,
341
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:38,520
enough money at the end of the year
for a new flatscreen is there
342
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:41,800
and the sports show
continues at 18 o'clock,
343
00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,680
I do not give a damn.
344
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:47,360
I feel safe here in this country.
345
00:21:48,360 --> 00:21:50,240
Nothing can happen here.
346
00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:53,600
There are security agencies here
347
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:56,280
warn one,
before something bad happens.
348
00:21:57,000 --> 00:22:02,840
However, there are 16 million e-mail addresses
were stolen some time ago,
349
00:22:02,920 --> 00:22:05,880
they warned us in time.
350
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,160
When it was too late.
351
00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:12,360
Yes and then...
352
00:22:17,120 --> 00:22:18,160
Then it was said
353
00:22:18,240 --> 00:22:22,680
you can get his e-mail address
enter in the website of an authority,
354
00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,680
and they would watch,
if everything is okay.
355
00:22:27,040 --> 00:22:31,920
And then the Germans have
like the digitally unlocked
356
00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:36,920
their e-mail addresses in the website
typed in by a completely foreign authority,
357
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,240
until their server collapsed.
358
00:22:40,000 --> 00:22:42,360
Lighter is a state authority
359
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:46,640
never to tens of millions of e-mail addresses
their paranoid population.
360
00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:55,000
Nothing happens? They are not allowed to do that?
361
00:22:55,080 --> 00:22:59,200
Yes, ask the NSA.
They even read your SMS.
362
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:02,320
But in Germany
you do not need NSA, no.
363
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:04,840
In Germany
gives the dutiful citizen
364
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:08,400
his e-mail address
still personally from the office.
365
00:23:08,480 --> 00:23:10,560
Obviously, the own cloud seems
366
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:13,960
with some the view
to cover the essentials.
367
00:23:14,040 --> 00:23:17,400
Because only that can be stolen,
which we also reveal.
368
00:23:18,600 --> 00:23:21,800
What did we laugh at,
when Merkel said:
369
00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:23,920
"The Internet is new territory for us all."
370
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,960
What do we have ... The stupid Merkel!
371
00:23:28,200 --> 00:23:31,080
At least since Edward Snowden
should be clear to all:
372
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,440
Obviously everyone had no idea.
373
00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:38,760
And of course it is new territory for everyone.
We do not know where that ends.
374
00:23:40,360 --> 00:23:41,920
We do not know that.
375
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,760
Do you remember 1987?
376
00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:48,400
Do you remember what was in 1987?
377
00:23:49,360 --> 00:23:52,160
There was Boris Becker
another tennis player.
378
00:23:53,520 --> 00:23:55,760
And Andy Warhol died.
379
00:23:56,160 --> 00:23:57,600
And otherwise?
380
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:02,240
There went in Germany
Millions of people on the streets.
381
00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:05,240
There were demonstrations here
Citizens' initiatives.
382
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:07,720
And do you still remember why?
383
00:24:08,560 --> 00:24:10,960
The people should be counted.
384
00:24:11,680 --> 00:24:15,640
And that was the Germans then
too much interference with their privacy.
385
00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,560
"I am not counted!
386
00:24:17,640 --> 00:24:21,000
Here is not a jumping jack
with a clicker and says
387
00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:22,760
'Miller, one, two, three, four.'
388
00:24:22,840 --> 00:24:24,360
That does not happen here! "
389
00:24:24,440 --> 00:24:27,040
After a lawsuit
before the Federal Constitutional Court
390
00:24:27,120 --> 00:24:30,320
were the plans
the then government stopped.
391
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:33,320
In the reason
The highest court in the country said,
392
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,400
that citizens in principle
even the right states,
393
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:40,440
about the disclosure and use
to determine their personal data.
394
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:45,680
Can you still imagine that today?
395
00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,160
That you yourself,
396
00:24:48,240 --> 00:24:50,600
So almost personally,
397
00:24:50,680 --> 00:24:53,320
about the disclosure
and using your own ...
398
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:59,080
That was allowed at that time,
the happy spinners!
399
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:02,800
And today, the year after Edward Snowden?
400
00:25:02,880 --> 00:25:05,280
There wishes
57% of the federal population,
401
00:25:05,360 --> 00:25:07,440
that there are no consequences
402
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:11,280
should be a no-spy agreement between
Germany and the USA fail.
403
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:17,400
Privacy is for many now
obviously a booth in the swing club.
404
00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:24,440
But for what values we stood and
for which rights we fought ...
405
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:28,600
... that will be the future
the next generation.
406
00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,040
This will be remembered.
407
00:25:32,120 --> 00:25:33,320
To this generation,
408
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:36,840
in the excitement and
Take a break from fucking shit so fast.
409
00:25:36,920 --> 00:25:39,680
We are social
and moral flatliners.
410
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,120
And what are we doing now
with Edward Snowden?
411
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:44,920
This is the young man
412
00:25:45,000 --> 00:25:48,360
the one by Hans-Christian Ströbele
occasionally supplied with Nachos.
413
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:54,720
He always drives in person.
Telephoning is too dangerous.
414
00:25:57,160 --> 00:26:00,240
Before the affair Snowden
Barack Obama once said:
415
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:03,240
"The best source of information
416
00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:07,080
about public waste,
Trickery and deception
417
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:09,160
is a public employee,
418
00:26:09,240 --> 00:26:13,080
that to public integrity
committed and meaningful.
419
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:16,040
Such courageous and patriotic action
420
00:26:16,120 --> 00:26:18,760
should be supported
and not be suppressed. "
421
00:26:21,120 --> 00:26:23,040
Did Obama say that?
422
00:26:24,520 --> 00:26:26,280
Let's get to the facts for a moment.
423
00:26:26,360 --> 00:26:29,560
Edward Snowden
was an employee of a government agency.
424
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:31,520
He is brave and he is a patriot.
425
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:34,960
He revealed secrets,
because, in his opinion, the US
426
00:26:35,040 --> 00:26:38,360
the bottom of their own values and rights
have left.
427
00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:41,560
Freedom, equality,
Human rights, the rule of law,
428
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:43,320
Freedom of belief and conscience.
429
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:47,400
Today the US threatens every country,
that works for Snowden, with stress.
430
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:50,920
This means:
Courageous action is suppressed.
431
00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:55,560
Edward Snowden
has risked his life,
432
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:57,360
to enlighten us.
433
00:26:58,560 --> 00:27:00,840
He has something for us
tells about our government
434
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:02,680
what we would never have learned without him.
435
00:27:02,760 --> 00:27:05,840
He made a transparency,
which is necessary.
436
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:10,560
We should be informed
what happens to our information.
437
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:13,760
Should an intelligence agency protect a country?
Naturally!
438
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:16,640
Should he make phone calls and e-mails
to intercept from people
439
00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,440
which endanger security?
440
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:19,560
Naturally!
441
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:24,000
Personally, I hold Angela Merkel
but not for a terrorist threat.
442
00:27:29,520 --> 00:27:33,560
The German-American friendship
is a question of power relations.
443
00:27:33,640 --> 00:27:36,160
That's what it's all about at the end of the day,
for power.
444
00:27:36,240 --> 00:27:38,800
Thomas Oppermann is also funny
from the SPD.
445
00:27:38,880 --> 00:27:42,360
He has Snowden at the beginning of the affair
in a nutshell.
446
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:46,040
Quote:
"I do not know if we are strong enough
447
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:49,840
this conflict
to endure to the last consequence. "
448
00:27:50,840 --> 00:27:54,640
Had Edward Snowden back then
half as scared as we are today,
449
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,880
the Americans would have us
listened even longer and dirtier.
450
00:27:58,720 --> 00:28:00,360
That's why it's very simple:
451
00:28:00,440 --> 00:28:03,200
Asylum for Snowden? "Yes, we can!"
452
00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:15,560
But I prefer to watch Exclusiv.
453
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,040
With Frauke Ludowig.
454
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:22,960
Yes, she always has such beautiful reports.
455
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:27,840
There are always these charity ladies
at the Frauke.
456
00:28:27,920 --> 00:28:30,600
These charity ladies
with these botox mouths.
457
00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:33,680
Already seen?
Yes, these charity ladies.
458
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:35,120
They always meet
459
00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:38,960
and then the lobsters eat
for the starving children in Africa.
460
00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:41,520
That's a great principle.
461
00:28:41,920 --> 00:28:45,200
And they always have
so lip gloss on the Botox mouths.
462
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:49,480
These botox mouths always look
like inflamed assholes.
463
00:28:57,240 --> 00:28:59,400
Maybe because only shit comes out.
464
00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:26,240
Look forward to it
on the cigarette in the break?
465
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:34,600
I could not do it.
466
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:38,800
Wait that long.
467
00:29:41,400 --> 00:29:43,800
And then
watch a spinner like that.
468
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:47,240
It's terrible.
469
00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:52,440
Are there actually smokers here,
or are you all organic?
470
00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:57,720
Do you remember,
why you started smoking?
471
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:02,760
Do you remember
to the Marlboro commercial?
472
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:07,200
"Come to Marlboro Country.
473
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:14,360
The taste of freedom and adventure. "
474
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:23,000
What a male commercial!
475
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:28,120
Cowboys on mustang stallions in the prairie.
476
00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:32,000
Leather, libido and campfire.
477
00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:35,720
Pound groves and horsepower.
478
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:39,520
Tobacco and testosterone.
479
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:44,160
Against the Marlboro man
Helmut Schmidt acts like a cough drop.
480
00:30:49,280 --> 00:30:51,680
Sometimes the spot is still in the cinema.
481
00:30:55,120 --> 00:30:58,680
But whenever I see that now,
I have to think about Brokeback Mountain.
482
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:04,080
No longer works.
483
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:08,400
Leather, libido and campfire.
484
00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:12,720
But because of the spot
I started smoking.
485
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:17,800
Yes, I wanted to be like that
like this Marlboro man.
486
00:31:17,880 --> 00:31:21,040
I wanted that freedom,
I wanted to inhale,
487
00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:22,720
I wanted to feel it,
488
00:31:22,800 --> 00:31:25,000
I wanted
to take that freedom in me.
489
00:31:25,080 --> 00:31:27,120
What is this freedom?
490
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:30,760
I wanted to be like that
like this Marlboro man.
491
00:31:30,840 --> 00:31:33,520
Well, I landed at the HB male.
492
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:37,680
Advertising already has incredible power.
493
00:31:37,760 --> 00:31:41,800
There freedom is sold to you,
and you end up in jail.
494
00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,000
In the prison of your addiction.
495
00:31:44,080 --> 00:31:47,960
Decades later
Do you fight them with nicotine patches?
496
00:31:48,040 --> 00:31:51,760
and leaves you acupuncture needles
stab in the nerve tracts.
497
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:53,800
Good, that's still possible.
498
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:57,240
Four of the Marlboro men are
died of smoking.
499
00:31:57,960 --> 00:32:00,160
Marlboro man meets Grim Reaper.
500
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:04,120
Yes, well, who is it?
501
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:05,440
That's so,
502
00:32:05,520 --> 00:32:09,640
as if Master Proper had his bald spot
get poisonous cleaning agent vapors.
503
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,640
Seek as freedom to sell,
that can only be advertising.
504
00:32:24,440 --> 00:32:25,760
That's what she does.
505
00:32:26,640 --> 00:32:29,200
Advertising is full of freedom.
506
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:33,160
"VISA: I take liberty."
507
00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:36,520
How fast
the freedom of your Visa card ends,
508
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:39,720
See you at the end of the month
to get the billing.
509
00:32:39,800 --> 00:32:43,360
That leaves your freedom
in pretty concrete terms.
510
00:32:44,320 --> 00:32:47,160
Very popular with the younger people:
Free and Easy.
511
00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:50,360
You have to have. Free and Easy.
512
00:32:51,680 --> 00:32:54,880
The problem is,
it costs EUR 25 activation fee.
513
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:58,960
Free and Easy is a mobile phone tariff from E-Plus.
514
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:04,760
Tobacco advertising is prohibited on television,
Mobile advertising is still allowed.
515
00:33:05,600 --> 00:33:06,920
I do not like it.
516
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:10,640
Try,
Her 14-year-old daughter
517
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,120
to take away the phone for a week.
518
00:33:13,200 --> 00:33:16,280
They would wish
that would start smoking.
519
00:33:23,120 --> 00:33:24,640
Free and Easy.
520
00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:28,600
But how free are we humans
really really?
521
00:33:28,680 --> 00:33:30,720
How free are we?
522
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:35,280
Our ancestors have the American
Declaration of Independence formulated.
523
00:33:35,360 --> 00:33:39,000
We stormed the Bastille,
we have raged against slavery
524
00:33:39,080 --> 00:33:41,800
we have ... we have sexually revolted,
525
00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:45,360
we differed from the religions
and distanced from their rigid rules,
526
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:48,640
we have the GDR on the rubbish heap
catapulted the story
527
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:50,000
and the man was voted out,
528
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:53,480
the blooming landscapes promised
but only grown cabbage.
529
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:56,560
We have the FDP
thrown out of the parliament
530
00:33:56,640 --> 00:33:59,120
because of her lie "more net of gross".
531
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:01,120
We did all that.
532
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:06,040
And then we let ourselves be seduced
from the perfidy of an advertising strategy?
533
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:12,639
Perhaps,
because we lost ourselves in the middle of it.
534
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:14,880
Perhaps,
535
00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:18,280
because we are using the concept of freedom
can not handle anymore.
536
00:34:19,159 --> 00:34:22,560
My generation has the freedom
always seemed out of the ass.
537
00:34:28,120 --> 00:34:30,760
Freedom was always there for us,
it was all free.
538
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:34,360
We can use the term
no longer fill at all.
539
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,120
That's why we are
new religions wanted.
540
00:34:37,199 --> 00:34:39,800
Commerce and consumption
are our new religions,
541
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,480
shopping at the Apple Store the Ave-Maria,
542
00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:44,760
Share and like the daily hallelujah.
543
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:49,199
Petitions are the new pillory,
Comments the public stoning.
544
00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:51,800
We wait like the crazy ones
on the new iPhone.
545
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:55,080
"The new iPhone is coming!"
546
00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:58,360
I am waiting for the day
where the first iChurch opens.
547
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,960
And there we are all standing
together and pray.
548
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:04,960
Apple ours in heaven,
549
00:35:05,520 --> 00:35:07,800
sanctified your iPhone,
550
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:12,640
come your design,
Your cell phone location is happening.
551
00:35:12,720 --> 00:35:14,960
Like in the iCloud, so on earth.
552
00:35:15,840 --> 00:35:18,120
Give us our daily Wi-Fi today,
553
00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:21,200
and forgive us our fat fingers,
554
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:25,480
as we forgive
the bad battery mileage.
555
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:28,440
And do not lead us into the funk hole,
556
00:35:29,280 --> 00:35:31,640
but deliver us from Microsoft.
557
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,480
Because yours is the MacBook,
558
00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:37,320
the iPad
559
00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:40,800
and the iPod forever.
560
00:35:41,640 --> 00:35:42,680
Update.
561
00:35:52,160 --> 00:35:55,400
You know by now
yourself all these situations:
562
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:58,480
They come to a cafe,
and there are two people sitting there.
563
00:35:58,560 --> 00:36:02,440
And they do not talk to each other,
but they have a cell phone and chat.
564
00:36:02,520 --> 00:36:06,520
And with two others in a cafe,
who do not talk to each other.
565
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:10,320
If she's the one from the first cafe
and those made up of the second,
566
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:12,560
they do not talk to each other
567
00:36:12,640 --> 00:36:15,680
but chat with those,
with whom they sit together.
568
00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:19,920
This is the social network
to merge the asocial.
569
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:23,600
And the mobile phone manufacturers and network operators
rub their hands.
570
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:27,560
Because the economy has been going on for a long time
Thoughts about our freedom.
571
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:32,040
The economy has been going on for a long time
Thoughts about our freedom.
572
00:36:32,120 --> 00:36:34,320
We are everywhere and nowhere.
573
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:38,600
We keep all paths open.
574
00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:42,160
We do not accept any liabilities
that would not be freedom.
575
00:36:42,240 --> 00:36:43,800
576
00:36:44,840 --> 00:36:46,840
The result: loneliness.
577
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:49,200
Very easily.
578
00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:52,440
And you know,
how to call this motto?
579
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:56,800
"Should everything be possible,
nothing can really become real. "
580
00:36:59,320 --> 00:37:01,000
Is a great sentence, right?
581
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:03,920
Is not from me.
582
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:15,520
Hans-Joachim Kulenkampff
said years ago:
583
00:37:15,600 --> 00:37:17,320
"People are not so stupid
584
00:37:17,400 --> 00:37:19,720
like us
through television. "
585
00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:24,960
And he was right.
He was far ahead of his time.
586
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:28,520
Today there are
such great things as home shopping.
587
00:37:29,680 --> 00:37:30,920
QVC.
588
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:34,160
Quasselköppe sell kappes.
589
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:40,600
Thanks to home shopping
can you ruin yourself financially,
590
00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:42,920
without getting up from the sofa.
591
00:37:43,000 --> 00:37:45,320
These shipments
are moderated by types,
592
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,280
the opposite
from Baden-Württemberg.
593
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:50,600
They can not do anything except High German.
594
00:37:59,600 --> 00:38:03,160
And if you are financially
then completely ruined ...
595
00:38:04,640 --> 00:38:07,160
... then comes the Peter Zwegat.
596
00:38:07,240 --> 00:38:08,640
He does that.
597
00:38:08,720 --> 00:38:11,640
He always stands
at Assis's home in the living room,
598
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:17,160
Mouth open and the view free
on his disastrous smoke,
599
00:38:17,240 --> 00:38:18,880
and then he always says:
600
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:21,960
"Man, man, man ..."
601
00:38:22,040 --> 00:38:26,360
He is always with the Assis
at home: "man, man, man ..."
602
00:38:26,440 --> 00:38:28,920
Peter Zwegat is
the only person in the world
603
00:38:29,000 --> 00:38:32,880
the stupidity of people in numbers
can write on a flipchart.
604
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:35,920
Sure, of course.
605
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:42,160
You do not have to do anything anymore.
606
00:38:42,240 --> 00:38:45,280
There comes an uncle from the television,
that settles that already.
607
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:51,280
They decorate the shack fully
with cork scrap from Ikea in colors,
608
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:53,440
which only Tine Wittler can find horny.
609
00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:56,640
They are digging up the garden,
they cook for you,
610
00:38:56,720 --> 00:38:59,640
the couple
the incestuous rural population.
611
00:39:01,480 --> 00:39:03,840
Yes, they are turning
more and more in regions,
612
00:39:03,920 --> 00:39:07,600
where humans and animals live closer together
as provided by nature.
613
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:09,000
But that is...
614
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:16,840
And these assis have to be
watch the show and get it,
615
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:19,080
that this principle does not work.
616
00:39:19,160 --> 00:39:20,640
They have to get it,
617
00:39:20,720 --> 00:39:23,160
that women exchange
has never worked.
618
00:39:23,240 --> 00:39:26,680
I have to get that as Assi,
that it does not work.
619
00:39:26,760 --> 00:39:32,240
But every week
they are exchanging families again.
620
00:39:32,320 --> 00:39:36,800
And as a change from the prolls
arrives at 18:30 at RTL Exclusiv.
621
00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:43,240
Then the Frauke shows Ludowig again
the whole Hartz IV receivers,
622
00:39:43,320 --> 00:39:46,560
how beautiful and luxurious
could be her life
623
00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:49,520
if she stops
would make a little more effort.
624
00:39:49,600 --> 00:39:51,520
A bit more effort.
625
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:53,720
Like Melanie Müller.
626
00:39:56,640 --> 00:39:59,360
The career of Melanie Müller
in fast passage:
627
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:02,920
After training as a restaurant specialist
she let her breasts
628
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:05,320
replace with two watermelons.
629
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:09,600
It was followed by four frivolous rattle movies
for the back of the men's video store.
630
00:40:09,680 --> 00:40:14,760
Both together ideal conditions
for the RTL premium format jungle camp.
631
00:40:15,640 --> 00:40:18,040
And Frauke Ludowig
has been making sure for 20 years
632
00:40:18,120 --> 00:40:20,440
that we know this shit every day.
633
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:23,240
For 20 years
is Frauke Ludovig's work routine
634
00:40:23,320 --> 00:40:25,760
from the faecal remains of this society.
635
00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:29,080
That's their job.
636
00:40:31,600 --> 00:40:34,040
It is their job
to spread this filth.
637
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:36,480
And why? Why?
638
00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:38,520
So I stay greedy.
639
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:40,480
They want to have me greedy.
640
00:40:41,280 --> 00:40:42,920
"I want that too!
641
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:44,880
Everything is possible!
642
00:40:45,720 --> 00:40:48,120
Once a year
can become a superstar!
643
00:40:48,200 --> 00:40:51,400
Only the tough get into the garden!
Survival of the fittest! "
644
00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:54,120
I am being incited
to the point of unconsciousness
645
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:57,200
and sleep exhausted
on the couch in front of the TV.
646
00:41:03,320 --> 00:41:05,800
Instead, I always have to
see these chefs.
647
00:41:06,640 --> 00:41:08,200
I can not see her anymore.
648
00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:11,640
What has been there in recent years
649
00:41:11,720 --> 00:41:15,240
everything filleted, poached,
garnished and embarrassed.
650
00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:20,440
And what does a cook do,
if he no longer has the shipment?
651
00:41:20,520 --> 00:41:23,440
Is he going back to his restaurant? Nope.
652
00:41:23,520 --> 00:41:25,440
He stays. Naturally.
653
00:41:25,520 --> 00:41:27,400
If one can hit an egg,
654
00:41:27,480 --> 00:41:29,640
then he can too
with waxed mustache
655
00:41:29,720 --> 00:41:31,880
on an old moped
to cucumber through the Eifel
656
00:41:31,960 --> 00:41:34,960
and people at the front door
to chat in a coma, of course.
657
00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:44,920
And if Steffen Henssler
currently no game show moderated,
658
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:46,680
he teaches felons,
659
00:41:46,760 --> 00:41:49,560
how to make zander
filleted with a sharp knife.
660
00:41:50,240 --> 00:41:54,800
"Always along the vein,
then the bleeding goes faster.
661
00:41:54,880 --> 00:41:56,440
Always along the vein. "
662
00:41:56,880 --> 00:41:58,160
On the idea to ...
663
00:41:58,240 --> 00:41:59,800
Would you have come up with the idea
664
00:41:59,880 --> 00:42:04,160
the cook of your Greek around the corner
as a coach for serious criminals ...
665
00:42:04,240 --> 00:42:05,400
No!
666
00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:06,560
You have to ...
667
00:42:06,640 --> 00:42:08,360
These are those rare moments
668
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:10,880
where I am
Florian Silbereisen wishes.
669
00:42:12,120 --> 00:42:13,120
But.
670
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:15,640
Really.
671
00:42:16,480 --> 00:42:19,840
Yes, he always stands
with carnival costume in the ARD rum.
672
00:42:20,680 --> 00:42:23,760
With the clothes
Even Thomas Gottschalk would say:
673
00:42:23,840 --> 00:42:25,600
"Friends, enough is enough."
674
00:42:32,720 --> 00:42:34,200
Then he always sings songs,
675
00:42:34,280 --> 00:42:38,560
the people in total frenzy
shot at the cattle drive.
676
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:43,440
And then he always stands there and says:
"I am so happy!
677
00:42:43,520 --> 00:42:49,400
I'm so happy! "
678
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,640
That says ten times in the evening,
679
00:42:52,480 --> 00:42:54,200
and in the end it is true.
680
00:42:55,600 --> 00:42:57,920
Since the silver trip is crazy.
681
00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:03,120
You can do such a program
only moderate with antidepressants.
682
00:43:06,080 --> 00:43:07,600
Or you become like Dieter Bohlen.
683
00:43:09,280 --> 00:43:12,600
A guy in prime time
on RTL decorates with people,
684
00:43:12,680 --> 00:43:15,760
they think,
they can sing or fart melodies,
685
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:17,320
absolutely not important.
686
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:20,240
Many lose, one wins,
Dieter deserves.
687
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:23,920
They make the media execution
of individuals sending minutes.
688
00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:27,720
There are now so many casting shows,
that I ask myself:
689
00:43:27,800 --> 00:43:30,280
Where do you still get in Germany?
the people,
690
00:43:30,360 --> 00:43:32,680
in the morning to go to work normally?
691
00:43:33,960 --> 00:43:35,920
They're all at the casting.
692
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:43,080
A normal television day
At the moment it looks like this:
693
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:46,880
On the breakfast television you tell,
that you beat up your wife.
694
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:50,520
At lunchtime you will go for it
sentenced by Judge Alexander Hold.
695
00:43:50,600 --> 00:43:52,680
In the evening, your wife sings with the super talent,
696
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,960
and then the whole nation gets it
why you beat her up.
697
00:44:05,640 --> 00:44:07,120
Many Thanks.
698
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:11,520
And, were you on vacation this year?
699
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:15,920
I really fly a lot.
700
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:19,920
I like to fly,
that's good for the environment.
701
00:44:21,480 --> 00:44:22,480
Yes.
702
00:44:22,560 --> 00:44:25,520
The only thing that scares me
is the luggage.
703
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:28,200
Does it arrive?
704
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:30,640
And if yes,
does it matter where I arrive?
705
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:35,280
Last year I am
15,000 km flown by plane
706
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:37,240
my luggage 45,000.
707
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:41,560
I would like to travel to all the places
where my luggage was already.
708
00:44:42,120 --> 00:44:44,760
That's why they say
at check-in always:
709
00:44:44,840 --> 00:44:47,120
"Please give up your luggage.
710
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:52,560
Just give it up. "
711
00:44:58,200 --> 00:45:01,080
There are
such a few stories while flying ...
712
00:45:01,160 --> 00:45:04,480
I do not know about you,
but a few stories ...
713
00:45:04,560 --> 00:45:07,120
We had recently
such a turbulent flight.
714
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:10,560
Really, it was ...
After landing, I asked a steward:
715
00:45:10,640 --> 00:45:13,440
"Did we land
or were we shot down? "
716
00:45:15,200 --> 00:45:18,520
They all know this:
The machine has landed ...
717
00:45:18,600 --> 00:45:23,200
In that case he has us from 10 m height
dropped onto the runway.
718
00:45:24,040 --> 00:45:27,040
And then it always comes
such a friendly voice.
719
00:45:27,120 --> 00:45:28,880
And she always says:
720
00:45:28,960 --> 00:45:30,560
"Yes hello.
721
00:45:30,640 --> 00:45:33,440
Welcome to Cologne / Bonn Airport.
722
00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:36,920
Please stay seated and strapped,
723
00:45:37,000 --> 00:45:38,680
until the plane
724
00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:42,920
his final parking position
has reached."
725
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:48,720
Whereupon a second later
everyone gets up.
726
00:45:50,520 --> 00:45:51,720
Well.
727
00:45:54,320 --> 00:45:55,920
Many think of course:
728
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:57,960
"Now I sat for two hours,
729
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:01,320
now it is nice, if you can
can stand so relaxed. "
730
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:07,400
That's nice after such a long flight.
731
00:46:08,280 --> 00:46:10,920
So relaxed. Good for the back and stuff.
732
00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:13,280
Also great are the people
733
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:16,000
the after landing
clap like crazy,
734
00:46:16,080 --> 00:46:18,840
just because the pilot
pursues his learned profession.
735
00:46:19,400 --> 00:46:23,360
You do that in the morning on the way
to work in the bus but not synonymous.
736
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:32,000
"Great stop here,
great, great stop!
737
00:46:32,880 --> 00:46:35,800
And look,
stopped exactly at the stop!
738
00:46:36,920 --> 00:46:40,720
Not 100 meters before,
not 100 m behind, great!
739
00:46:41,520 --> 00:46:43,880
What precision work.
740
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:48,520
And you know what?
Every day at the same! Super.
741
00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,160
Always this one stops exactly.
742
00:46:55,480 --> 00:46:57,280
He must have a navigation system.
743
00:46:58,400 --> 00:47:00,960
Sorry? Yes, TomTom has it too. "
744
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,120
"TomTom". Who came up with the idea?
745
00:47:04,200 --> 00:47:07,800
"TomTom". Then they would have the thing
also called "KlausKlaus".
746
00:47:14,720 --> 00:47:16,800
Everyone is so relaxed.
747
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:22,480
And a second very important action
still on the plane.
748
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:25,040
It is very important
that you do it in the plane.
749
00:47:30,600 --> 00:47:32,400
"I'm here now!"
750
00:47:34,040 --> 00:47:37,320
These are also sentences
who does not need the world, right?
751
00:47:37,400 --> 00:47:39,200
"I'm here now!"
752
00:47:40,200 --> 00:47:42,680
Yes, where else should he be?
753
00:47:42,760 --> 00:47:44,840
This is only surpassed by people
754
00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:47,880
the one with the phone
go through the pedestrian area and say
755
00:47:47,960 --> 00:47:50,480
"Yes, you, I'm just running."
756
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:54,440
The sentence only makes sense
757
00:47:54,520 --> 00:47:58,080
if you succeed a rehabilitation measure
completed.
758
00:48:01,280 --> 00:48:03,960
"Yes, you, I'm just running."
759
00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:06,200
Yes, of course, you are a primate.
760
00:48:08,520 --> 00:48:10,920
Imagine,
for millions of euros
761
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:14,280
satellites become thousands of kilometers
shot in the sky.
762
00:48:14,360 --> 00:48:17,080
Such a small satellite,
Thousands of kilometers ...
763
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:19,440
Now the small satellite flies
the whole day
764
00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:23,000
alone so over the earth.
765
00:48:25,400 --> 00:48:27,480
And there it is
the small satellite so ...
766
00:48:28,840 --> 00:48:30,080
"Oh!
767
00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:33,280
I'm very important! "
768
00:48:34,440 --> 00:48:37,040
It is a Dutch satellite.
769
00:48:44,840 --> 00:48:47,040
"Oh, I'm very important.
770
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,800
For the important communication
771
00:48:49,880 --> 00:48:51,920
from the important people. "
772
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:54,880
He'll get over thousands of miles
such information.
773
00:48:54,960 --> 00:48:57,600
"Yes, you, I'm just running."
774
00:49:00,080 --> 00:49:03,520
It feels like a small satellite
but also fooled.
775
00:49:03,600 --> 00:49:05,200
There the satellite thinks:
776
00:49:05,280 --> 00:49:08,520
"You asshole, the nonsense
you could have drummed too. "
777
00:49:12,920 --> 00:49:15,520
Is that actually already considered a sport? Nope.
778
00:49:16,480 --> 00:49:19,160
What me in the place
By the way, very fascinated:
779
00:49:19,240 --> 00:49:22,320
How long do you have to be Dutch?
Consume marijuana,
780
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:24,680
to introduce you to such a satellite?
781
00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:28,040
A satellite with only one wing,
782
00:49:28,760 --> 00:49:30,720
with a microphone in his hand,
783
00:49:30,800 --> 00:49:34,520
and 300 Germans watching him
that was worth the trip.
784
00:49:37,360 --> 00:49:39,480
Back to the plane.
785
00:49:39,560 --> 00:49:42,440
So they're all there
in the tin can,
786
00:49:42,520 --> 00:49:45,800
to wait for,
that the thing is screwed on the front,
787
00:49:45,880 --> 00:49:49,720
and as soon as is on, is always synonymous
such a running and shoving going on.
788
00:49:49,800 --> 00:49:52,440
Ever noticed?
People want fast ...
789
00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:53,720
As if it burns behind.
790
00:49:53,800 --> 00:49:56,520
People want to be fast
out of the machine.
791
00:49:56,600 --> 00:49:59,880
And they always want to
Be the first on the luggage belt.
792
00:49:59,960 --> 00:50:04,280
"We have to run very fast,
so that we are first on the luggage belt.
793
00:50:04,360 --> 00:50:06,200
Run fast so we are ahead.
794
00:50:06,280 --> 00:50:08,640
If we are not in front,
that is very bad. "
795
00:50:09,720 --> 00:50:12,560
I have the feeling,
people do not know
796
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:15,080
that the luggage flew with them.
797
00:50:16,480 --> 00:50:19,160
That would have to those
explain someone at check-in times.
798
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:23,120
"It can not arrive in front of you.
799
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:26,240
We can not beam or shoot it.
800
00:50:27,120 --> 00:50:29,760
It flew with you together. "
801
00:50:29,840 --> 00:50:32,400
And then very important
on the luggage belt itself:
802
00:50:32,480 --> 00:50:34,680
In the first row at the very front,
803
00:50:34,760 --> 00:50:38,360
four-headed families
please always next to each other.
804
00:50:39,160 --> 00:50:43,160
And if possible
everyone still with their own luggage cart,
805
00:50:43,240 --> 00:50:46,360
so that sometimes complete 6 m are blocked.
806
00:50:48,760 --> 00:50:50,240
And then that starts,
807
00:50:50,320 --> 00:50:54,640
which I generally only
denote baggage band Buddhism.
808
00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:05,080
There are 200 people.
809
00:51:06,280 --> 00:51:08,200
Most of them grow up.
810
00:51:09,240 --> 00:51:10,880
On a conveyor belt.
811
00:51:11,760 --> 00:51:13,960
And watch suitcases,
812
00:51:14,840 --> 00:51:16,960
how they drive in a circle.
813
00:51:18,360 --> 00:51:20,760
Can do that for hours.
814
00:51:21,640 --> 00:51:23,320
That brings nothing out synonymous.
815
00:51:24,240 --> 00:51:28,760
Unless your own suitcase is with you.
816
00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:31,680
Then they throw themselves
817
00:51:31,760 --> 00:51:36,560
like a paramilitary commando
on this luggage belt on it!
818
00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:40,600
I feel like people think
every suitcase comes only once.
819
00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:43,800
This is a kind of gambling.
820
00:51:44,800 --> 00:51:47,120
Each suitcase comes only once.
821
00:51:48,360 --> 00:51:50,720
And if they do not get him then ...
822
00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:54,960
... disappears
through a plastic curtain ...
823
00:51:56,120 --> 00:51:57,680
... in the trunk sky.
824
00:51:59,880 --> 00:52:02,000
And then he's gone forever.
825
00:52:03,240 --> 00:52:06,120
Then he will never come back.
826
00:52:09,440 --> 00:52:11,680
Unless he gets a Toblerone.
827
00:52:14,000 --> 00:52:17,440
I recently visited the airport in Cologne
seen an elderly couple.
828
00:52:17,520 --> 00:52:20,440
They were at the beginning,
where the suitcases go ...
829
00:52:21,640 --> 00:52:23,080
...bubble.
830
00:52:24,120 --> 00:52:31,080
Where he is under the guidance of her
randomly taking suitcases off the line,
831
00:52:31,160 --> 00:52:33,640
looked at the label
832
00:52:33,720 --> 00:52:35,680
and reset her again.
833
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:38,920
And they do not even have one
sorted by color.
834
00:52:40,280 --> 00:52:43,720
I asked her:
"Do you want to open a lost property office?"
835
00:52:45,360 --> 00:52:48,600
Then I still have
stood for an hour on the luggage belt.
836
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:53,280
Which suitcase did not come?
837
00:52:56,480 --> 00:52:58,240
Personal destiny.
838
00:52:59,000 --> 00:53:00,720
You know, one day ...
839
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:04,040
One day I will be before departure
at the check-in counter say:
840
00:53:04,120 --> 00:53:08,200
"Have a nice day,
the bag flies to Nice,
841
00:53:08,280 --> 00:53:12,440
the suitcase to Rome
and the backpack to Mallorca.
842
00:53:13,520 --> 00:53:16,560
It does not work?
It worked the last time. "
843
00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:26,680
If you fly again soon,
844
00:53:27,240 --> 00:53:31,040
there is the perfect opportunity
really fun on the day.
845
00:53:31,120 --> 00:53:34,160
That's almost tonight
something to take away for you.
846
00:53:34,240 --> 00:53:37,160
You have to promise me
that you try it.
847
00:53:37,240 --> 00:53:41,560
I promise you, so much fun
You will never have to fly again.
848
00:53:41,640 --> 00:53:46,720
You need a bit of courage, but ...
You live in Oberhausen, you have the.
849
00:53:48,040 --> 00:53:52,280
They go into the machine.
There are always two stewardesses at the front.
850
00:53:52,360 --> 00:53:54,880
They always say, "Have a nice day."
851
00:53:54,960 --> 00:53:58,120
"Beautiful good day."
They do not do anything else.
852
00:53:58,200 --> 00:54:01,480
In between pushing juice.
But otherwise: "Have a nice day."
853
00:54:01,560 --> 00:54:05,520
That's very important too:
Always book ahead when flying.
854
00:54:05,600 --> 00:54:07,240
When flying, always sit in front.
855
00:54:07,320 --> 00:54:10,440
When the machine crashes,
The minibar comes over again.
856
00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:20,560
And then you go
directly in front of the first stewardess
857
00:54:20,640 --> 00:54:22,000
and say to the:
858
00:54:22,760 --> 00:54:24,600
"Hello.
859
00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:28,480
I'm not feeling very well today.
I have to take a tablet right away.
860
00:54:28,560 --> 00:54:32,040
Could you give me, five minutes
after reaching the altitude,
861
00:54:32,120 --> 00:54:33,720
bring a glass of soda? "
862
00:54:33,800 --> 00:54:35,200
Says the: "No problem.
863
00:54:35,280 --> 00:54:40,280
When we reach the altitude,
I bring soda for your tablet. "
864
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:43,240
That's the whole preparation.
You do not have to do more.
865
00:54:43,320 --> 00:54:46,120
Now sit down
and strap on.
866
00:54:46,200 --> 00:54:48,000
The machine starts.
867
00:54:48,080 --> 00:54:52,360
Eventually comes the famous "Pling".
The suits will go out.
868
00:54:52,440 --> 00:54:54,840
For you the sign: altitude reached.
869
00:54:54,920 --> 00:54:58,280
So the following:
They unbuckle and get up.
870
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:01,560
They go to the ventilation,
this little gray thing,
871
00:55:01,640 --> 00:55:04,840
turn it twice to the left,
once to the right,
872
00:55:04,920 --> 00:55:08,880
and speak the following sentence
in the ventilation ...
873
00:55:11,240 --> 00:55:14,680
"Please a glass of soda!"
874
00:55:16,640 --> 00:55:18,640
Then sit down again.
875
00:55:19,880 --> 00:55:23,800
Now all other fellow travelers
You think you're completely crazy.
876
00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:27,520
But that changes suddenly,
877
00:55:28,520 --> 00:55:32,240
if three minutes later the stewardess
comes with a glass of soda.
878
00:55:32,320 --> 00:55:33,440
And then you look,
879
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:36,200
who everything
ordered his drinks over the ventilation.
880
00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:38,560
So much fun
Never have to fly again!
881
00:55:46,080 --> 00:55:47,520
Do it.
882
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:53,520
You just have to dare things.
883
00:55:55,680 --> 00:55:57,120
Something new.
884
00:55:59,880 --> 00:56:01,720
Do you know Facebook?
885
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:04,360
Facebook is awful.
886
00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:06,520
I am there too.
887
00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:09,840
I do not do any shit.
888
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:13,960
That's what many say: Facebook is awful.
But everybody joins in
889
00:56:14,040 --> 00:56:17,040
Everyone thinks Facebook is really bad,
but everyone joins in
890
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:20,120
And it happens to the generation,
that can not explain itself
891
00:56:20,200 --> 00:56:23,160
like that with National Socialism
could happen.
892
00:56:25,000 --> 00:56:26,360
Facebook.
893
00:56:26,440 --> 00:56:29,400
Facebook has since
over a billion members.
894
00:56:30,720 --> 00:56:33,400
That's more than the EU has inhabitants.
895
00:56:34,360 --> 00:56:37,920
With the big difference,
that on Facebook all are voluntary.
896
00:56:39,840 --> 00:56:42,160
Facebook is growing and growing.
897
00:56:42,240 --> 00:56:45,800
Facebook is that
fastest growing social network.
898
00:56:47,240 --> 00:56:49,720
Right after the Alcoholics Anonymous.
899
00:56:53,440 --> 00:56:57,280
On Facebook, you always meet people,
you have long since forgotten.
900
00:56:59,720 --> 00:57:01,560
I do not know about you
901
00:57:01,640 --> 00:57:05,440
but with me there is always a reason
why I forgot her.
902
00:57:07,160 --> 00:57:09,040
Since you have many friends on Facebook,
903
00:57:09,120 --> 00:57:11,840
and on my birthday
we were only three.
904
00:57:13,320 --> 00:57:16,320
And my wife and mother
are not even on Facebook.
905
00:57:20,200 --> 00:57:25,200
But "social networks",
that is the keyword of my generation.
906
00:57:25,280 --> 00:57:30,160
"Social networks", it is always said.
"Social networks".
907
00:57:30,240 --> 00:57:34,800
Or as it used to be called: pub.
Only with one big difference:
908
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:38,040
If my dad
visited his social network,
909
00:57:38,120 --> 00:57:40,600
he had to put on a pair of pants before.
910
00:57:41,960 --> 00:57:45,160
Today you are sitting in your undershirt
with dropped pants in front of the PC
911
00:57:45,240 --> 00:57:47,960
and nurse with both hands
your social contacts.
912
00:57:55,040 --> 00:57:57,560
But somehow it is
always so fascinating.
913
00:57:57,640 --> 00:58:00,360
There you have
this little white box,
914
00:58:00,440 --> 00:58:03,720
and then it stands
with such a gray font in it:
915
00:58:03,800 --> 00:58:05,720
"What are you doing now?"
916
00:58:07,400 --> 00:58:09,680
And then I always sit in front of it
and think ...
917
00:58:12,200 --> 00:58:14,360
... "Yes, what am I doing right now?
918
00:58:15,600 --> 00:58:18,240
What am I doing here? "
919
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:23,040
First of all, what am I doing,
What interests my friends?
920
00:58:24,200 --> 00:58:28,120
On Facebook you often read entries like:
"Oh, that's hot in the office today."
921
00:58:30,080 --> 00:58:33,160
Is a hell of a lot of information in it.
922
00:58:33,240 --> 00:58:34,320
Yes, sure.
923
00:58:34,400 --> 00:58:36,480
First, I have a job.
924
00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:38,640
Second, I can also facebook,
925
00:58:38,720 --> 00:58:41,400
because third
my colleagues work for me.
926
00:58:41,960 --> 00:58:46,160
Fourth, my mental loneliness
and social isolation so strong
927
00:58:46,240 --> 00:58:50,720
that fifth, I am with the internet
talk about the temperature in the building.
928
00:58:52,640 --> 00:58:54,440
Or an entry like: "Hm.
929
00:58:54,520 --> 00:58:58,200
Homemade yogurt
with fresh strawberries. "
930
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:05,080
Classic woman post.
931
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:13,520
When home-made food begins,
to spread sensual stimuli,
932
00:59:13,600 --> 00:59:15,840
is usually the menopause on the march.
933
00:59:21,840 --> 00:59:25,720
But then there are features on Facebook,
they do not exist in real life.
934
00:59:25,800 --> 00:59:29,440
You can do things on Facebook,
they do not exist in reality.
935
00:59:29,520 --> 00:59:31,120
For example:
936
00:59:31,200 --> 00:59:34,280
ignore a friend request.
937
00:59:35,760 --> 00:59:37,800
You can not stand at a party
938
00:59:37,880 --> 00:59:40,160
and then one says:
"Hello, I'm Klaus."
939
00:59:40,240 --> 00:59:41,520
And you...
940
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:47,600
"It's me, Klaus.
941
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:50,280
LOL. "
942
00:59:52,840 --> 00:59:54,920
But there are also features on Facebook,
943
00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:57,600
they would become one
in reality wish.
944
00:59:57,680 --> 00:59:59,960
I know a lot of people,
where it would be necessary
945
01:00:00,040 --> 01:00:01,840
to edit the profile.
946
01:00:09,320 --> 01:00:13,200
Ultimately, it's like Facebook
with all technical advancements.
947
01:00:13,280 --> 01:00:17,320
Nobody needs them,
they achieve little and destroy a lot.
948
01:00:18,840 --> 01:00:21,360
But that's why we humans love her like that.
949
01:00:22,360 --> 01:00:25,320
Because she's so crazy
have with us.
950
01:00:26,360 --> 01:00:28,000
Nobody needs us,
951
01:00:28,920 --> 01:00:30,200
we achieve little
952
01:00:31,200 --> 01:00:32,520
and destroy a lot.
953
01:00:34,400 --> 01:00:38,920
And now we are sitting there
and are all completely disoriented.
954
01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:41,920
And do not know where to go anymore.
955
01:00:42,480 --> 01:00:45,800
I think that's why we have
all such a sat nav in the car.
956
01:00:46,880 --> 01:00:48,240
Personally, I think so,
957
01:00:48,320 --> 01:00:51,680
a navigation system in the car is the first step
for assisted living.
958
01:00:53,960 --> 01:00:55,960
That's the moment you start
959
01:00:56,040 --> 01:00:59,400
your personal rights
to assign to machines.
960
01:00:59,480 --> 01:01:01,400
That was quite different in the past.
961
01:01:01,480 --> 01:01:04,040
If we are earlier
went on a summer vacation,
962
01:01:04,120 --> 01:01:08,400
of course with the caravan,
so much stereotype had to be
963
01:01:09,240 --> 01:01:12,880
there sat my mother, my brother and me
in the brooding hot car.
964
01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:19,000
Front on the hood
My dad had laid out a map of the world.
965
01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:22,600
He has eyes narrowed
draufgestarrt.
966
01:01:23,520 --> 01:01:28,400
He stared at it like that for five minutes,
then he got in, drove off,
967
01:01:28,480 --> 01:01:30,680
two days later
we were in southern France.
968
01:01:32,160 --> 01:01:35,360
If my mother him
stared stunned, he said:
969
01:01:35,440 --> 01:01:37,720
"Honey, it's perfectly normal,
970
01:01:37,800 --> 01:01:41,400
that within the EU
the French also speak Swedish. "
971
01:01:47,160 --> 01:01:51,240
Today you get in,
tippelst on a touch screen,
972
01:01:51,320 --> 01:01:55,920
and the part chases you for ten minutes
zigzagging through the Sauerland.
973
01:01:56,000 --> 01:01:58,560
Because we are disoriented.
974
01:01:59,120 --> 01:02:00,960
You do not have to do anything yourself anymore.
975
01:02:02,000 --> 01:02:04,880
My sat nav tells me where to go.
976
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:08,480
My wife tells me
what I should wear.
977
01:02:09,520 --> 01:02:12,480
My boss tells me
what i should work.
978
01:02:12,560 --> 01:02:14,960
And if I am then
asked in the canteen:
979
01:02:15,040 --> 01:02:17,280
"Cabbage roulade or Schnitzel?" ...
980
01:02:19,120 --> 01:02:20,960
... I start to stutter.
981
01:02:21,880 --> 01:02:24,200
Too many decisions at once.
982
01:02:25,280 --> 01:02:26,720
And I feel like
983
01:02:26,800 --> 01:02:30,280
that this disorientation
into areas,
984
01:02:30,360 --> 01:02:34,440
where you would have said earlier,
Orientation is a basic competence.
985
01:02:34,520 --> 01:02:36,240
I do not know what this is like
986
01:02:36,320 --> 01:02:41,120
It's been me for the last ten years
noticed in Berlin with the taxi drivers.
987
01:02:41,200 --> 01:02:43,920
Ten years ago
Did you get into a taxi in Berlin?
988
01:02:44,000 --> 01:02:47,680
and you said:
"Hello, Eisenacher Straße 25."
989
01:02:47,760 --> 01:02:51,160
There's the taxi driver
once shouting "shit",
990
01:02:51,240 --> 01:02:52,840
the Berlin counterpart for:
991
01:02:52,920 --> 01:02:55,680
"Good day.
Nice to drive you with me. "
992
01:02:56,880 --> 01:03:01,120
Today you get in, they start
So to set up discussion groups with you.
993
01:03:01,840 --> 01:03:07,040
I say: "Once Eisenacher Strasse 25."
Then he says: "Yes, yes, of course.
994
01:03:09,200 --> 01:03:10,560
I know."
995
01:03:11,880 --> 01:03:13,800
I say, "That's good."
996
01:03:15,040 --> 01:03:16,800
Says: "That's back there,
997
01:03:16,880 --> 01:03:19,920
there on the main street,
where the Vorbergstraße runs so diagonally,
998
01:03:20,000 --> 01:03:22,640
where there is the Akazienstrasse,
where it crosses,
999
01:03:22,720 --> 01:03:26,320
from the Vorbergstraße,
there's a Starbucks on the corner. "
1000
01:03:26,400 --> 01:03:28,120
I say, "My dear coachman ...
1001
01:03:29,080 --> 01:03:32,320
... first, there is this city
Hundreds of Starbucks stores,
1002
01:03:32,400 --> 01:03:35,920
because also the population of the FRG
apparently did not get it yet,
1003
01:03:36,000 --> 01:03:41,400
that they too at Starbucks for EUR 3.60
get 96% hot water.
1004
01:03:42,400 --> 01:03:43,680
Secondly:
1005
01:03:43,760 --> 01:03:46,560
When I knew,
where the Vorbergstraße goes off,
1006
01:03:46,640 --> 01:03:48,440
it would not make sense anymore
1007
01:03:48,520 --> 01:03:51,120
when I'm in front
and you would sit back? "
1008
01:03:53,160 --> 01:03:54,640
Then you will not hear anything anymore.
1009
01:03:55,480 --> 01:03:57,920
Only the tipple
on the touch screen.
1010
01:03:59,400 --> 01:04:01,920
Because we are disoriented.
1011
01:04:02,000 --> 01:04:03,960
I can even prove it to you.
1012
01:04:04,040 --> 01:04:05,960
You just have to go to one place
1013
01:04:06,040 --> 01:04:08,720
where the people
have no access to their sat nav.
1014
01:04:09,200 --> 01:04:13,000
Pedestrian area, Saturday noon, 14:30.
1015
01:04:13,080 --> 01:04:16,120
I do not know,
as you have learned to walk.
1016
01:04:16,200 --> 01:04:19,840
With us in Holland
it was relatively easy to structure.
1017
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:22,720
It meant one foot in front of the other,
1018
01:04:22,800 --> 01:04:24,400
despite wooden chunks.
1019
01:04:25,120 --> 01:04:26,800
One foot in front of the other,
1020
01:04:26,880 --> 01:04:30,120
and the whole thing as possible
in recurring order.
1021
01:04:31,320 --> 01:04:32,800
So far the theory.
1022
01:04:33,560 --> 01:04:37,360
Today the run
including fully packed Primark bags so:
1023
01:04:37,440 --> 01:04:38,560
They are running fast,
1024
01:04:38,640 --> 01:04:41,440
then one step to the right,
Turn up,
1025
01:04:41,520 --> 01:04:44,360
like cruise missiles
with disturbed on-board electronics.
1026
01:04:46,960 --> 01:04:49,280
I also believe
and I really believe that
1027
01:04:50,280 --> 01:04:53,760
I think,
that the women were better at walking.
1028
01:04:54,840 --> 01:04:58,040
There we can men
philosophize about reverse parking,
1029
01:04:58,120 --> 01:04:59,280
as long as we want.
1030
01:04:59,360 --> 01:05:00,840
Statistically proved:
1031
01:05:00,920 --> 01:05:03,560
women are
the better and safer motorists.
1032
01:05:03,640 --> 01:05:06,720
And I think so too
that the women were better at walking.
1033
01:05:06,800 --> 01:05:08,040
They are just ...
1034
01:05:08,120 --> 01:05:10,800
But when the men got it,
1035
01:05:10,880 --> 01:05:13,120
There a man invented the stiletto shoe.
1036
01:05:15,280 --> 01:05:18,840
And since then they are fluctuating
again evenly next to each other.
1037
01:05:26,640 --> 01:05:31,200
From the back through her Jack Wolfskin
Partnerlook jackets indistinguishable.
1038
01:05:32,280 --> 01:05:36,280
For a lifetime, are you trying
to be as individual as possible.
1039
01:05:36,360 --> 01:05:39,680
And then you end
in partner look jackets by Jack Wolfskin.
1040
01:05:41,000 --> 01:05:43,000
I think that's called satire.
1041
01:05:48,240 --> 01:05:50,560
But that's how they sway side by side.
1042
01:05:51,840 --> 01:05:53,520
Towards the sun.
1043
01:05:54,640 --> 01:05:56,600
In a better future.
1044
01:05:58,520 --> 01:06:00,280
But what will the future bring?
1045
01:06:01,560 --> 01:06:02,960
I dont know.
1046
01:06:04,080 --> 01:06:06,200
I really have no idea.
1047
01:06:06,800 --> 01:06:09,080
I just know,
that we are disoriented.
1048
01:06:10,080 --> 01:06:12,240
And that we do not know where to go anymore.
1049
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:15,960
The policy has passed,
1050
01:06:16,040 --> 01:06:18,840
we lead
no real discussions anymore,
1051
01:06:18,920 --> 01:06:21,440
it only goes by in the small-small.
1052
01:06:23,560 --> 01:06:24,920
The only difference
1053
01:06:25,000 --> 01:06:27,640
between a politician
and a phone is still:
1054
01:06:27,720 --> 01:06:30,680
You can hang up the phone,
if you have chosen.
1055
01:06:38,280 --> 01:06:40,600
There's nothing left,
which still gives us support.
1056
01:06:41,360 --> 01:06:43,240
What should stop us?
1057
01:06:45,360 --> 01:06:47,680
You can all hook the religions as well.
1058
01:06:49,280 --> 01:06:52,200
They all have now
Emergency in the Dachstübchen.
1059
01:06:53,880 --> 01:06:56,680
Let's just say it
the management up there is okay,
1060
01:06:56,760 --> 01:06:58,920
the problem is the ground staff.
1061
01:07:05,360 --> 01:07:06,880
Some focus
1062
01:07:06,960 --> 01:07:09,600
on the intercourse
with minors.
1063
01:07:10,920 --> 01:07:13,720
In church German
is that then called ministrantenweihe.
1064
01:07:16,920 --> 01:07:18,480
And the others just notice
1065
01:07:18,560 --> 01:07:21,360
when drunk
drive through Hannover.
1066
01:07:25,280 --> 01:07:28,800
Where the Käßmann there until today
has my greatest understanding of.
1067
01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:33,520
I do not know anybody,
the Hanover sober endures.
1068
01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:43,640
A share of another religion
is the conviction
1069
01:07:43,720 --> 01:07:47,200
the population on the benefits
to draw attention to their faith,
1070
01:07:47,280 --> 01:07:51,920
by blowing themselves up
or alternatively chop off people's heads.
1071
01:07:53,400 --> 01:07:56,200
Others again
follow a nice, elderly gentleman,
1072
01:07:56,280 --> 01:08:01,320
which is always wrapped in red sheets
and chuckles for no reason.
1073
01:08:03,760 --> 01:08:06,880
But the Dalai Lama is yes
as a political leader of Tibet
1074
01:08:06,960 --> 01:08:09,040
resigned some time ago.
1075
01:08:10,400 --> 01:08:14,080
And I say the same thing I do
Alf told the alien:
1076
01:08:14,840 --> 01:08:17,279
I will especially miss his laugh.
1077
01:08:22,920 --> 01:08:24,399
So we can say:
1078
01:08:24,479 --> 01:08:28,319
Religion has always something to do with people,
who have lost their orientation.
1079
01:08:30,279 --> 01:08:33,200
What's going on with the Catholics?
1080
01:08:33,279 --> 01:08:35,279
Honestly.
1081
01:08:35,359 --> 01:08:38,479
They really have a shortage of skilled workers.
1082
01:08:38,560 --> 01:08:41,359
Everyone gets it now
a leadership position,
1083
01:08:41,439 --> 01:08:44,319
the one at Nazareth
not thinking of a heavy metal band.
1084
01:08:48,640 --> 01:08:50,120
And Cardinal Meisner,
1085
01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:53,359
resulting from his career
adopted with the words:
1086
01:08:53,439 --> 01:08:57,600
"A family of you
replace me with three muslim ones. "
1087
01:08:59,399 --> 01:09:03,160
This is
this integrative idea of the Meisner.
1088
01:09:04,120 --> 01:09:07,520
You're wondering if that's the frankincense
smoked in the pipe.
1089
01:09:09,279 --> 01:09:12,000
Is that still dementia?
or even rabies?
1090
01:09:13,800 --> 01:09:16,399
Or Bishop Tebartz-van Goldelster.
1091
01:09:18,319 --> 01:09:20,720
He has forgotten his kois.
1092
01:09:21,760 --> 01:09:24,960
But, he forgot the kois,
in the basin.
1093
01:09:25,040 --> 01:09:27,439
I would have grilled the tough, honest.
1094
01:09:27,520 --> 01:09:31,439
I would have grilled the tough guy.
Bishop Tebartz-van Goldelster.
1095
01:09:32,200 --> 01:09:36,680
A bishop who has a foundation
closed to needy people,
1096
01:09:36,760 --> 01:09:40,160
in parallel
to fulfill the dream of the golden diocese.
1097
01:09:40,720 --> 01:09:42,560
He sat down a palace,
1098
01:09:42,640 --> 01:09:45,479
Everyone would be there
American gangster rapper jealous.
1099
01:09:45,560 --> 01:09:47,399
If they had not stopped
1100
01:09:47,479 --> 01:09:51,319
would he still have the Elbphilharmonie?
brought as a parking garage for his cars.
1101
01:09:58,160 --> 01:10:02,440
But somehow I am grateful to him
for his luxury builders orgy.
1102
01:10:02,520 --> 01:10:05,760
Without that many would have in Germany
not at all noticed
1103
01:10:05,840 --> 01:10:09,480
about what fortune
the Catholic Church has.
1104
01:10:09,560 --> 01:10:12,240
They still pray every Sunday
1105
01:10:12,320 --> 01:10:15,920
and button the grandma
the barren pension with the bell bag from.
1106
01:10:17,360 --> 01:10:20,120
Conservative estimates suggest that
1107
01:10:20,200 --> 01:10:25,160
"conservative estimates"
means "property property until 1859",
1108
01:10:25,240 --> 01:10:28,600
according to conservative estimates
has the Catholic Church
1109
01:10:28,680 --> 01:10:32,440
about a real estate asset
of EUR 200 billion.
1110
01:10:34,840 --> 01:10:36,480
In Germany.
1111
01:10:38,840 --> 01:10:41,600
What to do with the plasticine
everything could have done!
1112
01:10:42,840 --> 01:10:45,680
The Catholics
could have saved Greece.
1113
01:10:47,240 --> 01:10:49,840
Or the airport
to finish in Berlin.
1114
01:10:57,840 --> 01:11:01,120
Or from me too
the 300,000 homeless people in Germany
1115
01:11:01,200 --> 01:11:03,800
a roof over your head
and a hot meal.
1116
01:11:04,680 --> 01:11:06,560
But they prefer to pray.
1117
01:11:11,640 --> 01:11:13,520
They prefer to pray.
1118
01:11:13,600 --> 01:11:17,600
Because praying obviously long term
is financially profitable.
1119
01:11:18,560 --> 01:11:22,920
But now they have Francis,
everything is going to be okay now.
1120
01:11:23,000 --> 01:11:24,640
At least he tries.
1121
01:11:24,720 --> 01:11:27,680
I only hope,
that they do not poison that or anything.
1122
01:11:28,680 --> 01:11:32,520
He would not be the first pope to be
found with a blue tongue.
1123
01:11:34,320 --> 01:11:36,120
I have respect for faith.
1124
01:11:37,640 --> 01:11:40,840
I also respect people,
who believe in something.
1125
01:11:40,920 --> 01:11:43,200
But I have
a big problem with people,
1126
01:11:43,280 --> 01:11:47,440
the organization and interpretation
to take over faith for other people.
1127
01:11:47,520 --> 01:11:49,160
People who explain to others
1128
01:11:49,240 --> 01:11:51,640
how to believe something
and understand.
1129
01:11:51,720 --> 01:11:54,160
This indoctrination
from felt half knowledge
1130
01:11:54,240 --> 01:11:56,360
from badly translated books.
1131
01:11:56,440 --> 01:12:00,000
If I already hear that:
"Jesus made wine out of water."
1132
01:12:00,960 --> 01:12:02,240
So what?
1133
01:12:03,240 --> 01:12:05,560
This is an ancient German invention.
1134
01:12:06,960 --> 01:12:09,560
That's what they do
for ages on the Mosel.
1135
01:12:11,960 --> 01:12:16,640
Or: "Moses shared the sea." Well.
Walter Ulbricht shared Germany.
1136
01:12:19,600 --> 01:12:22,000
There is hardly any left.
1137
01:12:22,080 --> 01:12:25,600
I'll wait until sometime
the billion-dollar assets are used up.
1138
01:12:25,680 --> 01:12:27,440
It also costs all the money.
1139
01:12:27,520 --> 01:12:31,640
All the palaces, the staff,
the alimony payments, that costs everything.
1140
01:12:32,720 --> 01:12:35,080
I am waiting for the day
where the Catholic Church
1141
01:12:35,160 --> 01:12:38,200
from a business consultant
needs to be rehabilitated.
1142
01:12:38,280 --> 01:12:40,920
If there is such a McKinsey rangeht.
1143
01:12:41,000 --> 01:12:43,840
Then it gets tough
streamlined and saved.
1144
01:12:44,840 --> 01:12:48,640
The bishop can use the incense,
the wine, the bible and the bread
1145
01:12:48,720 --> 01:12:50,800
also carry alone through the church.
1146
01:12:50,880 --> 01:12:53,240
He does not need any staff for that.
1147
01:12:53,320 --> 01:12:56,080
Since he gets a nice wicker basket,
and let's go.
1148
01:12:57,720 --> 01:12:59,160
And what is saved,
1149
01:12:59,240 --> 01:13:01,800
you can do that again
invest in the Lord's Supper.
1150
01:13:01,880 --> 01:13:05,040
They want us
bind as a long-term customer.
1151
01:13:05,120 --> 01:13:09,520
Then there is no boring eating paper
to the big cock sucking more,
1152
01:13:09,600 --> 01:13:12,160
rather
a fresh French baguette.
1153
01:13:13,080 --> 01:13:14,600
And a nice Bordeaux.
1154
01:13:15,640 --> 01:13:17,680
From the vineyard of the Lord.
1155
01:13:17,760 --> 01:13:20,320
They do not always have to
drink everything alone.
1156
01:13:22,400 --> 01:13:23,960
For 2,000 years ...
1157
01:13:24,920 --> 01:13:28,560
... touring with the same piece
through the in-house theater.
1158
01:13:33,080 --> 01:13:35,040
And what is their quintessence?
1159
01:13:35,120 --> 01:13:36,760
"Everything was better before."
1160
01:13:39,640 --> 01:13:42,640
Instead, the
a sex scandal after another.
1161
01:13:42,720 --> 01:13:44,760
As if it were a rock'n'roll band.
1162
01:13:45,960 --> 01:13:49,440
The Ratzinger has in the end
in some cases condoms allowed.
1163
01:13:49,520 --> 01:13:53,000
Has anyone understood that?
In individual cases he has ...
1164
01:13:53,080 --> 01:13:56,480
What had the ship?
That a ministrant becomes pregnant?
1165
01:13:57,480 --> 01:13:58,560
Yes, sure.
1166
01:13:58,640 --> 01:14:01,360
Sexual abuse
is not a Catholic problem.
1167
01:14:02,320 --> 01:14:05,160
They are people from all corners,
Layers, denominations.
1168
01:14:05,240 --> 01:14:09,840
Of course, sexual abuse is never
a question of religious conviction.
1169
01:14:10,840 --> 01:14:12,240
But the Catholic Church
1170
01:14:12,320 --> 01:14:15,360
has after the release
various cases of abuse
1171
01:14:15,440 --> 01:14:19,320
the unique opportunity
to prove what it means
1172
01:14:19,400 --> 01:14:22,320
about a strong moral foundation
to dispose of.
1173
01:14:23,600 --> 01:14:25,240
But nothing came.
1174
01:14:26,200 --> 01:14:30,840
They have a completely vermurkstes
and stunted relationship to sexuality.
1175
01:14:30,920 --> 01:14:33,760
Celibacy was introduced
around the church
1176
01:14:33,840 --> 01:14:37,800
before the possession claims of children
to protect from church leaders.
1177
01:14:38,600 --> 01:14:41,440
It never was
a question of religious conviction.
1178
01:14:42,560 --> 01:14:45,440
It was simply about money.
1179
01:14:45,520 --> 01:14:46,520
And we believe
1180
01:14:46,600 --> 01:14:49,760
the Taliban are religious spinners
and deluded fanatics.
1181
01:14:50,880 --> 01:14:55,480
Well, in the unquestioned name of Islam
People spontaneously blow themselves up.
1182
01:14:55,560 --> 01:14:57,040
A nice way
1183
01:14:57,120 --> 01:14:59,960
the good news
to get under the people.
1184
01:15:00,920 --> 01:15:03,720
That's also a concept
that was thought out.
1185
01:15:04,640 --> 01:15:08,240
When a madman is in the midst of hundreds
blown up by people,
1186
01:15:08,320 --> 01:15:11,120
there are the relatives of the victims
definitely say
1187
01:15:11,200 --> 01:15:13,280
"This with Islam is a great thing.
1188
01:15:14,240 --> 01:15:17,600
Nice that the young man us
that has brought it closer. "
1189
01:15:19,200 --> 01:15:20,720
What does it look like?
1190
01:15:20,800 --> 01:15:23,800
in a training camp
for suicide bombers?
1191
01:15:23,880 --> 01:15:26,840
Is there a teacher up there,
the students are sitting in front of him
1192
01:15:26,920 --> 01:15:29,880
and then he straps himself
an explosives vest around and says
1193
01:15:29,960 --> 01:15:33,600
"Well, boys, watch out.
I will only show you this once. "
1194
01:15:39,040 --> 01:15:40,280
I do not understand.
1195
01:15:41,720 --> 01:15:44,000
And because there are these poor lunatics,
1196
01:15:44,080 --> 01:15:47,800
becomes the doner killer around the corner
suddenly a potential assassin.
1197
01:15:49,800 --> 01:15:53,120
He's been standing for 20 years
in Wuppertal in his kebab shop
1198
01:15:53,200 --> 01:15:55,760
and cuts lamb skewers
with the electric knife
1199
01:15:55,840 --> 01:15:58,560
and does not understand the,
that blow themselves up,
1200
01:15:58,640 --> 01:16:01,440
still the,
who suddenly make a turn around him.
1201
01:16:01,520 --> 01:16:04,000
What we need are real role models.
1202
01:16:04,080 --> 01:16:08,440
People like Michael Wendler
and Lothar Matthäus.
1203
01:16:08,520 --> 01:16:11,400
People who are so stupidly stupid
1204
01:16:11,480 --> 01:16:14,840
that we will finally be back
Humility to get over this fucking life.
1205
01:16:14,920 --> 01:16:17,120
People, who you think so ...
1206
01:16:19,600 --> 01:16:21,120
... "Oh, come on.
1207
01:16:24,800 --> 01:16:26,600
The main thing is healthy. "
1208
01:16:37,680 --> 01:16:39,320
God does not need us.
1209
01:16:40,360 --> 01:16:42,360
We need God.
1210
01:16:42,440 --> 01:16:44,440
Has a clever mind once said.
1211
01:16:45,560 --> 01:16:49,440
All of us, as we sit here,
have invented the religions,
1212
01:16:50,760 --> 01:16:52,560
not to forget ourselves.
1213
01:16:54,080 --> 01:16:57,520
We need them to answer the big questions
of life.
1214
01:16:57,600 --> 01:17:00,720
The sense of life,
the meaning of dying.
1215
01:17:01,600 --> 01:17:04,240
And since then prevails
up there thick crowds.
1216
01:17:04,320 --> 01:17:08,400
Every religion wants the Jordan
cross over the right footbridge.
1217
01:17:08,480 --> 01:17:10,960
And we crawl God
alternately in the butt.
1218
01:17:11,040 --> 01:17:14,120
"I am the better person,
I say that God is the greatest,
1219
01:17:14,200 --> 01:17:17,440
I do a lot for him,
I blow myself up for him. "
1220
01:17:18,360 --> 01:17:22,280
For 2,000 years
Let's break our heads now.
1221
01:17:23,320 --> 01:17:25,880
In the hope,
thereby being closer to God.
1222
01:17:27,560 --> 01:17:30,680
While probably
sitting up there and thinking ...
1223
01:17:32,440 --> 01:17:35,440
... "How do you even know
that I have a butt? "
1224
01:17:38,600 --> 01:17:43,200
And thereby
it could be so incredibly easy.
1225
01:17:45,240 --> 01:17:48,080
It could be so incredibly easy.
1226
01:17:49,200 --> 01:17:51,280
In the Jewish Torah it says:
1227
01:17:51,360 --> 01:17:55,040
"What you do not love,
do not do that to your neighbor either. "
1228
01:17:56,640 --> 01:17:59,200
From the Prophet Muhammad is handed down:
1229
01:17:59,280 --> 01:18:02,560
"None of you
has the right faith,
1230
01:18:02,640 --> 01:18:04,800
as long as you
does not love for your neighbor,
1231
01:18:04,880 --> 01:18:06,840
what you love for yourself. "
1232
01:18:07,800 --> 01:18:09,720
And in the New Testament Jesus says:
1233
01:18:10,680 --> 01:18:13,840
"Love your neighbor like that
like yourself. "
1234
01:18:18,000 --> 01:18:20,080
It would probably be too easy.
1235
01:18:22,000 --> 01:18:23,000
Amen.
1236
01:18:38,480 --> 01:18:40,280
I have no answers.
1237
01:18:41,400 --> 01:18:44,000
I have questions
but I have no answers.
1238
01:18:45,680 --> 01:18:47,400
Unfortunately I do not know.
1239
01:18:48,600 --> 01:18:50,680
I would like to understand ...
1240
01:18:52,160 --> 01:18:54,080
... but I do not understand it.
1241
01:18:55,320 --> 01:18:57,400
But one, I know that.
1242
01:18:58,240 --> 01:19:00,160
And I know that one hundred percent.
1243
01:19:01,040 --> 01:19:04,880
That would not have happened
if my dad would still live.
1244
01:19:05,800 --> 01:19:09,600
Because he always knew what to do.
1245
01:19:10,160 --> 01:19:13,280
That's why I want to be here tonight
say goodbye to you,
1246
01:19:13,360 --> 01:19:17,040
how my father said goodbye,
when he was invited.
1247
01:19:17,120 --> 01:19:18,800
Because he could do something special.
1248
01:19:18,880 --> 01:19:21,400
He could man
give a moment,
1249
01:19:21,480 --> 01:19:25,120
in which they neither look to the future
still thought of the past.
1250
01:19:26,040 --> 01:19:29,840
A moment in which she completely
in the here and now were, beings.
1251
01:19:30,920 --> 01:19:34,320
It was nothing philosophical
it was not intellectual,
1252
01:19:34,400 --> 01:19:36,280
it was downright banal.
1253
01:19:37,560 --> 01:19:41,000
At the end of the evening he gathered
always a few people around.
1254
01:19:41,080 --> 01:19:42,800
Then he addressed one and said:
1255
01:19:42,880 --> 01:19:45,520
"Call me a playing card
from a poker game.
1256
01:19:45,600 --> 01:19:48,640
Not the ace, that's simple and easy.
1257
01:19:48,720 --> 01:19:52,680
Imagine a complicated picture
a complicated map. "
1258
01:19:52,760 --> 01:19:55,560
Then, for example, the one said:
"Piksechs."
1259
01:19:55,640 --> 01:19:58,440
Then my father took
his wallet out of his pocket ...
1260
01:20:01,360 --> 01:20:03,600
... and in the wallet
was an envelope.
1261
01:20:05,840 --> 01:20:08,400
And in the envelope was a playing card.
1262
01:20:09,720 --> 01:20:11,320
And the pit six.
1263
01:20:13,040 --> 01:20:16,080
That was always fascinating.
People were astonished for a second.
1264
01:20:16,160 --> 01:20:18,440
In this amazement
they were in the here and now.
1265
01:20:18,520 --> 01:20:22,080
You did not think of anything.
This fascinated me as a child.
1266
01:20:22,160 --> 01:20:25,680
I wanted to know how it works,
how it works.
1267
01:20:25,760 --> 01:20:26,920
My father always said:
1268
01:20:27,000 --> 01:20:31,280
"You know, boy, sometimes it's better,
if you do not understand something. "
1269
01:20:33,160 --> 01:20:35,120
I never got that as a kid.
1270
01:20:36,840 --> 01:20:39,640
So i have
secretly watching my father.
1271
01:20:39,720 --> 01:20:42,400
He was in the study,
and I wanted to see that.
1272
01:20:42,480 --> 01:20:46,200
He picked up a deck of cards,
it fanned
1273
01:20:47,040 --> 01:20:48,560
breathed in,
1274
01:20:49,240 --> 01:20:50,560
exhaled,
1275
01:20:50,640 --> 01:20:53,880
exhaling he took a card
and put it in an envelope.
1276
01:20:53,960 --> 01:20:58,600
In the evening the same game.
Someone called a card and that was it.
1277
01:20:59,760 --> 01:21:02,600
When I was 18, my dad said:
"It's time, boy.
1278
01:21:03,440 --> 01:21:05,640
You have to take over the tradition. "
1279
01:21:06,520 --> 01:21:10,320
So I took that first time in life
such a card game in the hand,
1280
01:21:10,400 --> 01:21:12,320
it fanned
1281
01:21:12,400 --> 01:21:14,040
breathed in,
1282
01:21:14,120 --> 01:21:16,120
exhaled,
1283
01:21:16,200 --> 01:21:18,880
took a card,
ran to my mother and said
1284
01:21:18,960 --> 01:21:20,520
"Mama, call a playing card."
1285
01:21:20,600 --> 01:21:22,040
She said, "Karoneun."
1286
01:21:22,120 --> 01:21:25,280
I opened the envelope.
It was the fifteen.
1287
01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:28,600
I had exactly one card next to it.
1288
01:21:29,520 --> 01:21:33,400
Whenever I did that,
I always had a card beside it.
1289
01:21:33,480 --> 01:21:36,160
Did someone say, "foursquare",
I had the cross three.
1290
01:21:36,240 --> 01:21:38,640
I always missed one.
It was frustrating.
1291
01:21:39,720 --> 01:21:42,800
Accordingly rare
I did it.
1292
01:21:44,760 --> 01:21:47,280
In 2007 my dad died.
1293
01:21:49,920 --> 01:21:52,560
A few days before
we met again.
1294
01:21:53,200 --> 01:21:56,600
I come in,
he smiles at me and says
1295
01:21:57,440 --> 01:22:01,160
"Well, boy?
Do you have another card in your wallet? "
1296
01:22:02,160 --> 01:22:04,200
I say, "Mm."
1297
01:22:05,800 --> 01:22:09,560
He says, "Do we want to go again?"
I say, "Mm."
1298
01:22:10,760 --> 01:22:12,560
He says, "King of Hearts."
1299
01:22:15,720 --> 01:22:19,520
I take out the wallet,
get the envelope out,
1300
01:22:20,280 --> 01:22:21,440
Map...
1301
01:22:22,520 --> 01:22:24,360
... and it was the lady of the heart.
1302
01:22:25,920 --> 01:22:28,120
I was wrong again.
1303
01:22:28,200 --> 01:22:32,480
He looked at me for a long time
and someday said to me
1304
01:22:33,280 --> 01:22:34,520
"You know, boy ...
1305
01:22:35,520 --> 01:22:37,320
... maybe that's your way.
1306
01:22:38,480 --> 01:22:40,440
Maybe that's your destiny.
1307
01:22:41,680 --> 01:22:43,800
You're always wrong.
1308
01:22:45,880 --> 01:22:48,400
This is your very own way.
1309
01:22:48,480 --> 01:22:51,080
You're always wrong. "
1310
01:22:53,160 --> 01:22:55,240
He died a few days later.
1311
01:22:56,960 --> 01:23:00,280
Since then I take every day
a shit card game in the hand ...
1312
01:23:01,320 --> 01:23:02,760
... fan this ...
1313
01:23:03,920 --> 01:23:05,280
...Inhale...
1314
01:23:06,440 --> 01:23:10,080
... exhale, take a card
and put it in my wallet.
1315
01:23:11,120 --> 01:23:13,440
And guess what we do now.
1316
01:23:14,640 --> 01:23:19,240
The lady in front,
name a color, red or black.
1317
01:23:19,800 --> 01:23:21,040
Black.
1318
01:23:21,120 --> 01:23:22,120
The gentleman beside it.
1319
01:23:22,200 --> 01:23:25,160
Imagine,
the black starts to form.
1320
01:23:25,240 --> 01:23:28,640
Either to a spades icon
or to a cross symbol.
1321
01:23:28,720 --> 01:23:31,200
- Which symbol do you see?
- Cross.
1322
01:23:31,280 --> 01:23:32,480
Cross.
1323
01:23:33,040 --> 01:23:36,360
The gentleman up here.
The cross starts to diverge.
1324
01:23:36,440 --> 01:23:38,760
More and more crosses
turn up in front of your eyes,
1325
01:23:38,840 --> 01:23:41,000
it forms a nice card.
1326
01:23:41,080 --> 01:23:44,960
You can now see a cross card.
Which cross card do you see?
1327
01:23:45,520 --> 01:23:47,000
- Jack.
- Kreuzbube.
1328
01:23:48,080 --> 01:23:51,280
Also tonight
I have in my wallet ...
1329
01:23:52,800 --> 01:23:54,360
... a playing card.
1330
01:23:55,440 --> 01:23:56,960
In an envelope.
1331
01:23:58,800 --> 01:24:00,920
They wanted tonight
1332
01:24:01,000 --> 01:24:02,520
the crossbills.
1333
01:24:03,680 --> 01:24:05,040
And it is...
1334
01:24:07,120 --> 01:24:08,640
... the cross lady.
1335
01:24:18,960 --> 01:24:22,640
And so gives me this little moment
of wonder with you hope.
1336
01:24:24,280 --> 01:24:25,640
For the moment,
1337
01:24:26,720 --> 01:24:29,640
where I am at my dad's side
to be buried ...
1338
01:24:32,160 --> 01:24:34,000
... and one last time ...
1339
01:24:35,240 --> 01:24:37,040
... hear his voice.
1340
01:24:38,440 --> 01:24:39,640
"Well, boy?
1341
01:24:40,520 --> 01:24:42,440
Are you lying around again? "
1342
01:24:44,400 --> 01:24:46,200
End of the close season.
1342
01:24:47,305 --> 01:24:53,628
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