Original subtitles

Should be around now...

Awesome!

Bite Me If You Love Me

What is that?

Yes! I got a new one!

Sorry for making you wait, Hitomi!

What? Which idol?

Many girls are into K-pop these days.

Personally, I like Jang Geun-Suk...

What? Amazing, isn't it?

I just love the way he opens his mouth.

Zombies again?

Hitomi! Are you sure you're right in the head?

To be more specific, he is not a zombie but a Sanguella.

The film isn't by George A. Romero but by Lucio Fulci.

Some people say that it was poorly made...

But for me, he is such a gorgeous zombie.

I don't get it!

Why on earth you would waste your precious youth talking about zombies?

We are high-school girls!

Handsome guys or chocolate parfait...

That's what we should be interested in!

I don't like sweet things.

Even handsome guys are lame because they tend to be alive.

A real man should be quiet and dead.

Thafsjust a dead body, then.

Technically, ifs a thing, not a living creature.

Whatever. Different strokes and all that.

You like handsome guys, right? I like zombies.

That kind of thing?

Let's go.

Hey, Zombie!

Zombie?

We're busy meeting with new girls today.

We can't finish our homework.

We'll need help from Mr. Zombie who always aces his tests.

Can you do our homework for us?

Here it is. Do a good job.

Don't forget, Zombie!

You know what'd happen if you ran away, right?

He's been bullied since middle school.

He is always dazed like a zombie.

- His twitter handle is Mr. Zombie. - Mr. Zombie?

Wait, Hitomi!

Mr. Zombie!

What the hell? You have a heartbeat!

What? A heartbeat?

I was hoping you'd be a real zombie.

- What? - I have no business with a living person.

Dr. Herbert West...

He rules!

That's right!

If there is no zombie, I can make one myself.

It has to be around here somewhere...

Here it is. This is it.

I see...

I can't read this!

Hey, these look too similar!

Are you trying to get us busted?

I didn't mean...

Fine, change the writing until noon.

Seriously?

Mr. Disappointing Zombie!

Well...

Is this the moment I've dreamed about, where a girl asks me out?

Yesterday...

You wanted to know if I had a heartbeat.

What did you mean by that?

Did you want to know if I liked you?

Or if there's any chance for us?

I think I got it right...

I should tell you then, I've had feelings for you since admission.

So, I have a lot of heartbeats.

What? It was exactly as I said.

I checked your pulse to see if you're alive or dead.

Unfortunately, you're still alive.

That's why you're Mr. Disappointing Zombie.

Disappointing?

You are not a modem zombie like in Romero's Night of Living Dead...

but a classic voodoo zombie, a blood-sucking zombie like in the 1966 movie by Hammer Films.

Hammer? What?

You are controlled by someone else.

As if you were working in a mine.

I think they are too cruel.

I haven't had any turning point.

I could do better if I became more confident about myself.

Are you going to keep talking about this?

Do I have to listen to you?

Well, you are not.

- You don't want to? - Not even a bit.

Go tweet about it if you want to.

Let's delve a bit deeper into Romero's zombies...

Romero, The Great Genius, used zombies from monster movies to make statements about society.

Romero's zombies are not characters but a phenomenon.

Why don't you blog about these things?

- What? Did you say something? - Nope.

So... Every zombie since Romero has become like that.

Zombies as metaphor for society.

I think there should be some kind of turning point in zombie movies.

I don't want it to be so extreme that it damages Romero's reputation though.

Screams in Wales and Annihilation of the World are both good.

The 28 Hours Later series is good as well.

But it's hard to consider them zombie movies.

- I don't understand a single bit. - That's why we have this!

Zombie Research?

Japanese English education has a problem.

I can't read this at all.

The English classes are useless.

- This is French though... - French?

If you think this is English then there really is something wrong with our education.

What?

Nothing...

Anyway, Haiti is in Central America, right?

- They speak English in America, don't they? - In the United States, yes. America is huge.

So is Hokkaido.

No, it's 300 times bigger than Hokkaido.

You know many things.

It's called common sense.

Wait, what's going on here?

If you want to say something, say it directly.

You don't have any friends, right?

Isn't that too direct?

Anyway, Haiti. Is this about Haiti?

That's right.

That's why.

French is their native language.

It was a French colony for a long time.

Can you translate it?

Well... I guess...

Do you have any plans after school?

I have to study some.

My parents are on a long-term business trip.

I'm living by myself. Want to come over to my place?

Huh?

Wait at the gate after school then.

Is this the heartbeat?

Spray the magic liquid onto the stone and pound it into powder.

Then add corpse powder and beans.

And mix it with pufferfish poison. That's how zombie powder is made.

What does it mean?

What's up? You don't understand?

Uh...The stone...

Here...

A new stone created by lightning...

According to researchers, it is a stone that has existed since ancient days.

Where can we get that kind of stone?

Uhmmm... From the internet?

Stealing the ashes? What are they trying to do?

Stop right there!

Tada!

Is this the stone? It doesn't look special at all.

It should be legit.

I paid 20,000 yen for it.

I think it'll be ready soon.

Say...

What are you going to do with this?

I'll tum you into a zombie, of course!

You what?

I've already written your suicide note.

Fm tired of getting bullied.

Father, Mother... Please forgive me for leaving you early.

You see?

You will get busted for that.

What are you doing?

You like girls' underwear, right?

You were looking at it the other day.

That's a dirty trick. You knew?

Of course.

If you like it so much, I can give it to you.

Fresh High-School Girl Underwear.

Right here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Here.

Dead. Dead.

Instant death...

Should be around now...

What?

What is this?

It feels like Dustin Hoffman in The Graduate.

You watch movies without zombies?

Well... Sometimes...

Happy zombie birthday!

Let's eat it!

Let's eat!

You're not having any?

I have no appetite.

It's delicious.

Sorry for eating alone. It's your birthday after all.

That's okay.

I have to sleep now.

Then I'll head home.

To where?

My home?

You are dead now.

If you go back now, they'll be shocked.

If you really want to go back, wait until the Obon Festival.

The Obon Festival?

What should I do then?

It's all because you killed me.

Take responsibility!

Stay here then.

What?!

Well...

That...

I guess...

Thank you...

You're welcome...

Good!

What's up?

Are you gonna fuck me in my sleep?

That's alright.

My first time should be with a zombie anyway.

I will give you my virginity.

Much obliged...

But I can't move my body.

Rigor moms'.!

No way!

It's like I'm dead.

- You are dead. - That's right.

That doesn't make me feel any better though.

That's okay.

I'll do you.

You smell good.

Because I'm dead...

Amazing...

I'm very excited.

Me too.

Your heart doesn't beat.

It's very stiff.

That's also due to rigor mortis.

Are you excited about having sex with me?

Yeah.

But I was a virgin before my death...

So, does this still count as losing my virginity?

That doesn't matter.

Sorry about being a corpse.

It's cold and stiff.

Just like a frozen fish.

It's so amazing!

I'm having sex with a zombie!

It's awesome!

It feels so good!

How is it? Are you warm now?

I can move now.

Rigor mortis usually lasts for 90 hours.

Be patient.

But I'll start decomposing then.

That's a good thing. That's what zombies do.

It's hard again!

Sorry.

I'd like it if that part had rigor mortis permanently.

Does it feel good?

Very"

I feel like doing it again.

We'll be late for school...

But I can't help it!

Wait, you're too good at this! Have you really been a virgin until yesterday?

Sometimes a late bloomer can do things better.

Hey, can you walk a bit faster?

We are completely late.

Sorry.

Do I have to attend school after death?

I want to show everyone my zombie boyfriend.

Don't you want to show off a pretty girlfriend like me?

Of course...

You see?

But this outfit...

Shouldn't we go get my uniform?

We'll come back after school.

Also, you look good in it.

I can't take that as a compliment.

Let's go.

Thank you, Show! What a Death!

What a death!

It's true!

I thought my heart would stop.

Hejumped out of his coffin in the middle of his funeral.

The zombie became a real zombie?

I never heard of such a thing.

You guys have been bullying him for a long time.

What are you going to do if he comes back for revenge?

We're not scared of him even if he became a real zombie. Right, guys?

- Of course not! - What's he gonna do?

Good morning. Look, my boyfriend! Mr. Zombie, the real zombie.

A zombie'.!

No! No! Don't come near me!

What's wrong?

Sorry for bullying you. Forgive us!

I'm sorry! I'm sorry!

Well... Sorry for the late delivery.

Your homework.

I changed the writing as requested.

Whoa...

Let's go back home...

Okay.

Will it look good on him?

How is it?

Looks good! Amazing!

I'll use a bit of this.

What are you doing?

It's been two weeks since I became a zombie.

I've started to smell.

It smells good! Just like a zombie should!

No it doesn't.

Don't! You're ruining it!

Anyway, I've bought some meat.

Beef...

Pork...

Chicken...

Which do you prefer?

You haven't eaten anything since you died.

You should eat something for your health.

There's no such thing as a healthy zombie.

Your face looks good as well.

This is the real face of a zombie.

I guess you are right.

You should eat something.

I have no appetite.

Maybe meat from an animal is not enough?

Hello! Hitomi? What's up?

You haven't been coming to school.

Are you still with Mr. Zombie?

About that? My advice?

Of course, we are friends!

Sure, yeah.

Where should we meet?

The park?

Eat her now! She should taste good right after death.

But should I...

Should I chop her up first?

Fine.

Here, eat!

How is it? Delicious?

It's not just about the taste.

I have to survive.

Good.

If you don't appreciate the taste, her death will be meaningless.

But she was your friend, right?

It's strange to say this kind of thing while I'm eating her.

You just killed your friend.

Girls prioritize their boyfriends over their other friendships.

Are you okay?

What a weak zombie...

Sorry.

That's all of her.

I hope it's okay.

I will leave home due to some personal issues.

Father, Mother. Please don't look for me.

I'm going to send this to her home.

The same trick again?

Would you like to eat? You can have sweets sometimes.

No, thanks.

Why? Are you on a diet?

No way.

Fmjust still full with your friend.

I don't know how long a Zombie's digestion takes.

Are you okay?

Are you okay?

I think people are looking at us.

Because you're an amazing zombie!

I feel embarrassed.

I'm off to school.

You'll be fine by yourself, right?

Yes.

I've told my neighbor that my cousin lives with me.

Don't disturb anyone, okay?

Got it.

Could you take out the trash for me today?

Yeah.

And could you go buy toilet paper for me too?

- Got it. - Thank you.

- I'm leaving. - See you...

You should cover it with a net.

There are lots of cats and crows around here.

That's not from me. I did it properly.

It smells horribly.

I can clean that up if you like.

Would you do that? Doesn't the smell bother you?

I'm used to it.

More like it's lucky to have my own smell disguised.

Wait, you must be the cousin Hitomis living with.

That's me.

You have a kind heart. I'm going to help you.

Thank you.

- Sorry. - It's okay.

Thank you. Sorry.

It's nothing.

Can I have some toilet paper?

I'll give you a 20% discount for your help.

Thank you.

I feel I've become better with people since becoming a zombie.

Excuse me!

Are you a zombie?

- Yes, I am. - I knew it!

- Can I have your autograph? - Can I take a picture of you?

Please.

Please.

I've never given anyone my autograph.

Even during the graduation ceremony, I didn't give any autographs.

How did you find out about me?

Many fans already know that a zombie boy is in Yamamuki-cho.

Please come out more often.

Who is this?

- He's a zombie. - He's kinda cute!

He looks so cool, right?

Hitomi?!

I'm Taro Geroyama from Production Hakuhodo.

Hakuhodo?

I would like you to be in a commercial for Bloody Coke.

This is a red-colored coke.

Passionate Bloody Splatter!

The passionate splatter of blood and organs!

Passionate! Passionate splatter!

The splatter of pure love!

Hound you that day.

I extended my hand to you.

You nodded slightly.

Thar day was the beginning of our love.

I want to kiss those red lips.

I want your cure body.

I can't help it.

That white belly.

I'm going to bite you with my fangs.

The passionate splatter of blood and organs!

Passionate! Passionate splatter!

The splatter of pure love!

Being a zombie rules! I'm so glad I died!

Passionate Splatter! Bloody Coke!

Being u zombie rules! Fm so glad I died!

Blood Spraying Everywhere!

This has become really popular now.

I have so many fans, that I can't walk on the street without being noticed.

I'm glad I became a zombie.

My life peaked after my death. Life is so confusing!

Whatever...

What's wrong, Hitomi?

Aren't you glad that I became popular?

Who was the one who made you a zombie?

You, of course.

Do you feeljealous?

That's ridiculous.

I'm going to sleep.

According to him, he was a virgin until he died but he had sex for the first time after death.

In other words, he lost his virginity after death.

He is very excited that he became popular after his death...

Feur of the Murderous Zombie! The Bones of u Missing High-School Girl Have Been Found!

This is where it began, in Yamamuki-cho, Bunkyo, Tokyo.

The bones of a female murder victim were found.

They belong to Ai Izumi, formerly attending Yamabuki High, 18 years old.

She went missing last month.

Due to the call log on her phone and a letter sent to Ai's home, police are investigating Ms. A.

Mr. Zombie. who lives with Ms. A and recently became famous for a Bloody Coke commercial...

claims that he ate the victim and that Ms. A was not involved in the case.

Police arrested Mr. Zombie immediately.

The case is now in its final phase.

However, it's very difficult to prosecute him.

Nobody has yet figured out Mr. Zombie's legal status.

My son is dead. I have the proof of his death.

I have already registered him as dead with the city office.

We even have his will.

This is definitely my son's writing.

Anyway, that monster is not my son!

Is Mr. Zombie Japanese? Do laws made for humans apply to him?

There has been some confusion over his nationality and legal status.

And even killing him like an animal is not possible since he is already dead.

Do not release the zombie!

Mr. Zombie has been released amidst this legal confusion.

Naturally, people are against the release of the murderer during the hot summer days.

The employees of thejail started a strike against the admittance of the zombie.

Even the government has been taking special measures for this case.

Neighbor

Of course, I'm scared!

I can't even go outside safely.

Zombies eat people, right?

I feel sorry for the murdered girl.

If you imagine your own daughter being the victim, anyone will oppose his release.

The death penalty is required! Bum him!

Tum him to ashes!

I can't take off my mask because of the smell.

The smell is all over town.

Until Mr. Zombie has totally decomposed, the locals can't sleep well.

Sorry. Sorry. Are you okay?

Did it hurt?

Fans are stupid.

They used to be totally into you...

And just because you're a murderer now, they turn against you.

Want a sip?

Oh, this?

Friday the 13th.

It's not that I'm tired of zombies, but in the current situation, I can't watch zombie movies.

It's not that I'm tired of zombies. Zombie, my love!

Don't worry. You can stay here forever.

That's so mean, Jason Yamada!

Yourjokes are so funny! Was that an American joke?

- You are making everyone suffer. - That's right.

The whole town stinks!

You're disturbing my business! Go somewhere else!

I have small kids. You're a bad influence on them!

Go somewhere else!

Murdous Zombie!

- Go somewhere else! - Don't touch me!

- Go now! - Never come back!

Murderer!

I'm home!

Hey, where are you?

You are not here?

Where did you go?

I'll rot here and become part of the mountain.

Trees will start growing from my body.

Small birds will sit on the branches and sing their beautiful songs.

I'll won't be lonely then.

Is that a tear?

Even this rotting body can shed tears.

Or is it just pus?

Some other liquid?

I'm lonely.

I'm very lonely now.

Jason Yamada... You're half-Japanese, right?

You're always hiding your face behind that hockey mask. Are you embarrassed to show your own face?

You are shy.

Do you work at a supermarket?

What?! You get your money on the 13th?

The 13th is payday?!

It feels so good!

You're so deep inside me! I've never felt this good!

You're killing me!

I feel like I'm dying!

This is real sex!

L\\ � \ \ I \� 3

I'm cumfflgi I'm cummg'

What's up now?

Are you up for another round already?

You are very passionate!

Just wait a bit! I'm cleaning myself up!

Hey! Wake up!

Hitomi?

What are you doing in a grave? You are already a zombie!

There is no such thing as eternal sleep for you!

Wait, what happened to your body?

I became a zombie too.

Look, I'm a pile of gore.

It seems that somebody killed you.

Did somebody kill you?

Jason Yamada.

He's a serial killer.

I was wrong to give up on you.

Poor thing. Wasn't it painful?

It doesn't matter anymore.

I became a zombie like I always wanted.

My dream came true.

Let's think positively.

I think we can try many positions with this new body.

Kissing while doing it doggy style or you could eat my ass during missionary

That's not a thing for us to think of right now.

I'm fine!

You want to take me in all kinds of ways, right?

Let's fuck!

I want to try sex as a zombie.

Wait a minute.

If that's the case, I have something to take care of before that.

Something to take care of?

It's very hard to move this body.

That idiot...

He can't even fight properly.

Okay, then.

You can't do anything properly without my help.

Guilty as charged...

Things come out right after eating.

Am I wasting it somehow?

As long as it's delicious, it's okay, isn't it?

Sorry for having an affair with this bastard.

I know better now. I like zombies the most.

We look good together.

I will be with you forever from now on.

I am glad you are not lonely anymore.

Are you okay?

What a weak zombie...

Sorry.

But you looked cool when you fought him earlier.