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National Film Archives present

Presented by Film Studio Barrandov

JOSEF KILIÁN

CAST

SCRIPT

MUSIC

SET DESIGNER

EDITOR

SOUND

MAKE-UP

PRODUCTION DESIGN

PRODUCTION

DIRECTOR OF PHOTOGRAPHY

DIRECTORS

"The Komsomol is Our Model"

"Five-Year Plan in One Year"

"Destroy the Colorado Beetle"

"More Coal for the Republic"

"Hands Off!"

"Cholera. Plague. Flies. Truman's Allies!"

"Our People Will..."

I beg your pardon.

Is Comrade Kilián here by any chance?

- Who? - Kilián.

Know anyone called Kilián?

Why?

Do you know him?

I just wanted to tell him someone had passed away.

I haven't seen him in ages.

- Who? - Kilián.

Me, neither.

I thought he left.

Where did he go?

I don't know, but he won't get lost in a crowd.

I don't understand you.

No, I'll never understand that.

Do you get the idea?

- I just don't understand you. - You've never understood me.

Can't you understand Czech? Hear me?

I don't understand anything anymore.

I'm glad you understood that.

CAT RENTAL SHOP

Good morning.

Good morning.

I'd like to rent a cat, please.

What kind?

One like that, perhaps...

RENTAL POLICY

"Cats rented only to persons aged 18 or over with proof of identification.

"The manager may refuse to rent a cat without stating why.

"The office may charge double

"for each day in excess of the agreed rental period.

"The customer must examine the cat's condition upon receipt.

"The misuse of rented cats is punishable by law."

- Identity card. - Excuse me?

Identity card.

15 crowns.

- Goodbye. - Goodbye.

"Honzík, I'm sending you some lard and a few apples.

"They aren't worm-eaten.

"I wanted to visit you, but there's no one to feed my hens.

"I'd like to clean your flat and wash your windows.

"I'm sure you can't even see through them anymore.

"Mrs Mrázková asked if you were engaged. I told her you were.

"What business is it of hers?

"Don't send me any money. I don't need any. I say that every time.

"I bought you some new sheets. I'm sure yours are threadbare.

"Come see me soon. Mummy."

Hello. I'm looking for the cat rental shop.

Cat rental shop? Hang on. That rings a bell.

I was here yesterday...

Give me half a second, and it'll come to me.

Do you know of a cat rental shop here?

No, I don't. A cat rental shop?

Is it supposed to be around here?

- Why not ask that lady there? - Ask that lady, thank you.

You're welcome.

Excuse me. I'm trying to find the cat rental shop.

- Do you know where...? - I don't.

That's a pity. I wonder what I should do now.

- Is there a cat rental shop..? - Is this some kind of a joke?

No, it isn't, but... Wait a minute, I'll have a look.

- I'll find it. - I know it was here yesterday.

I say, isn't it over there?

Beg your pardon. Do you know where the cat rental shop is?

No, I don't.

Do you know where the cat rental shop is?

I don't speak Czech.

Can you tell me where the cat rental shop is?

- I have no idea. - You see, I borrowed a...

- Excuse me, does that cat bite? - No. Don't be scared.

You could ask at the vet's here on Loan Street.

- I'd say it's in that direction. - No, near St. Henry's Tower.

- There was a vet named Dr Véle. - But this was a shop...

Try the phone book under "Pets", otherwise I don't know.

Thank you. Goodbye!

Beg your pardon. Do you know where the cat rental shop is?

I don't, but there's a menagerie in Vršovice.

No, this was a shop and...

There's an old lady with 15 cats who lives by Sova's Mills.

- She'll be able to tell you. - Think so? Thank you.

- A what rental shop? - Cat.

Cat?

- When were you there? - Yesterday.

You see, I'm accruing a late fee of 30 crowns a day,

and if I can't find the place...

I know I'll find it, but it could take some time...

If you could give me a note confirming that I wanted to...

Someone must've thought up the shop, right? So, where is it?

I'm not insulting or attacking anyone, Comrade.

It's just that I can't stand being made a fool of...

Hi!

Then buy some cigarettes.

I admit this might look suspicious to you.

It would to me, but I...

I really don't know how it happened.

It just occurred to me that I might borrow a cat. That's all.

I'll gladly tell you why I did it, but I'd have to lie.

I had no reason. It never dawned on me that I needed one.

I know it was my mistake. One should have a reason.

Next time I'd like to set things right.

You see, whatever happened, I'm just an ordinary person.

- What does that mean? - It couldn't happen anywhere else.

- Where else? - I don't know.

What do you mean, you don't know?

Where else? Do you mean it's better elsewhere?

- No. - Then what do you mean?

Nothing.

Do you mean this could have happened, say, in Brazil?

I don't mean anything.

In Brazil there's a 53% illiteracy rate.

Doesn't that interest you?

It does, but what am I supposed to do with the cat?

Why did you borrow a cat when you claim you never wanted one?

That's the point.

You go rushing around to all sorts of offices.

You shout at us, slander us,

yet it would never occur to you that it's all your own fault.

Extension 110.

You're all the same.

Line 7, please.

One even has to look after your cats for you!

Comrade Kilián, please.

He's gone...

Seventy two.

"Do Not Enter Unless Invited"

"Workers' Suggestions"

Who?

Kilián?

There's no one here.

I don't understand you.

There's absolutely nothing here.

A quality that differentiates man from animals. Nine letters.

Reasoning.

No... obedience.

Hello there!

Me?

Sorry, I thought...

- Aren't you Mr Kilián? - No, I'm not.

- Then I've made a... - Don't worry about it.

THE END