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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,335 --> 00:00:04,087 BOWERS: So, you can see that Sheldon has a baby tooth 2 00:00:04,170 --> 00:00:06,464 that never fell out. 3 00:00:04,170 --> 00:00:06,464 Is that a problem? 4 00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,675 Well, it's gonna keep the adult tooth from coming down, and... 5 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:10,218 it's gonna need to be extracted. 6 00:00:10,301 --> 00:00:13,096 Oh, he is not gonna be happy about that. 7 00:00:13,179 --> 00:00:14,723 No, he is not. 8 00:00:14,806 --> 00:00:17,142 Are you sure we can't just wait this thing out? 9 00:00:17,225 --> 00:00:18,810 It's gonna cause all the other teeth around it to come in 10 00:00:18,893 --> 00:00:21,646 crooked and, well, you know, braces can be expensive. 11 00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,189 (groans) 12 00:00:23,273 --> 00:00:26,151 He is gonna freak out about the pain 13 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,319 and the needle and the blood. 14 00:00:28,403 --> 00:00:29,946 Yeah, I wouldn't mention that stuff when you tell him. 15 00:00:30,029 --> 00:00:32,282 Uh, can't you tell him? 16 00:00:32,365 --> 00:00:33,616 (laughs) I'm not gonna tell him. 17 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,077 But you're his doctor. 18 00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,077 And you're his mommy. 19 00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:38,246 Which means that I have to deal with him all the time. 20 00:00:38,329 --> 00:00:40,290 Help me out here. 21 00:00:38,329 --> 00:00:40,290 No. 22 00:00:40,373 --> 00:00:42,959 Okay. Can we tell him together? 23 00:00:43,042 --> 00:00:44,127 No. 24 00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:47,589 All right. 25 00:00:47,672 --> 00:00:51,468 What if I put your business card, free of charge, 26 00:00:51,551 --> 00:00:54,763 in the next church newsletter? 27 00:00:56,055 --> 00:00:59,309 So, Sheldon, little bit of dental news. 28 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,144 You have a baby tooth 29 00:01:01,227 --> 00:01:02,479 that never fell out. 30 00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:04,481 Neat. Even my teeth are stubborn. 31 00:01:04,564 --> 00:01:09,319 Anyway, in order for your teeth to come in straight, 32 00:01:09,402 --> 00:01:12,155 Dr. Bowers is gonna need to pull it out. 33 00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:14,491 Why didn't I hear this from him? 34 00:01:14,574 --> 00:01:16,159 I had the same question. 35 00:01:16,242 --> 00:01:18,661 But a tooth extraction is a major procedure. 36 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:20,163 Not necessarily. 37 00:01:20,246 --> 00:01:22,040 Will there be blood? 38 00:01:22,123 --> 00:01:22,999 A little. 39 00:01:23,082 --> 00:01:24,042 Will there be a needle? 40 00:01:24,125 --> 00:01:24,959 Maybe, but you won't feel it, 41 00:01:25,043 --> 00:01:27,003 'cause he's gonna put you under first. 42 00:01:27,086 --> 00:01:28,505 Put me under? With drugs? 43 00:01:28,588 --> 00:01:29,839 That's even more dangerous. 44 00:01:29,923 --> 00:01:32,050 Sheldon, lots of people get their teeth pulled. 45 00:01:32,133 --> 00:01:33,551 It's not a big deal. 46 00:01:34,594 --> 00:01:36,346 Stop enjoying this. 47 00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,014 Sorry. 48 00:01:36,429 --> 00:01:38,014 No, you're not. 49 00:01:38,097 --> 00:01:40,183 No, I'm not. 50 00:01:38,097 --> 00:01:40,183 (sighs) 51 00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:43,186 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 52 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:46,022 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 53 00:01:46,105 --> 00:01:48,566 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 54 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:50,944 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 55 00:01:51,027 --> 00:01:55,240 ♪ I am a mighty little man. ♪ 56 00:02:02,789 --> 00:02:05,375 This is not exactly the date night I'd envisioned 57 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:07,502 when I was shaving my legs. 58 00:02:07,585 --> 00:02:08,837 I'm almost done. 59 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:09,671 We're elderly, you know? 60 00:02:09,754 --> 00:02:11,881 If anything, dinner should be early. 61 00:02:11,965 --> 00:02:13,216 Well, I'll tell you what, when I'm finished, 62 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:16,386 I am gonna whisk you off to the finest-- 63 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:19,389 and the only-- Chinese food place in town. 64 00:02:19,472 --> 00:02:22,350 Ying's? Their nachos are weird. 65 00:02:22,433 --> 00:02:24,352 I don't know, it's not a bad idea 66 00:02:24,435 --> 00:02:27,939 to maybe venture out of Medford once in a while. 67 00:02:28,022 --> 00:02:30,400 Even better, why don't we go away for the weekend? 68 00:02:30,483 --> 00:02:31,901 Uh, come on-- You know how hard it is 69 00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,236 for me to get out of the store. 70 00:02:33,319 --> 00:02:35,238 What's the point of being the boss 71 00:02:35,321 --> 00:02:37,365 if you can't get somebody else to do your work for you? 72 00:02:37,448 --> 00:02:41,119 Uh, I might be able to leave Georgie in charge. 73 00:02:41,202 --> 00:02:42,745 My grandson? 74 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:44,581 That'd be the one. 75 00:02:44,664 --> 00:02:47,417 I want to go, so I'm just gonna say "good idea." 76 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,585 (chuckles) 77 00:02:48,668 --> 00:02:50,128 (both laugh) 78 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,550 Hi, Sheldon, what can I do for you? 79 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:58,553 Do you have any books or videos on the Lamaze technique? 80 00:02:58,636 --> 00:03:01,097 Uh-oh. Georgie get that girl pregnant? 81 00:03:01,180 --> 00:03:02,932 It's for me. I need to have a tooth pulled, 82 00:03:03,016 --> 00:03:05,310 and I'd like to do it without putting my brain on drugs. 83 00:03:05,393 --> 00:03:07,103 Okay. 84 00:03:07,186 --> 00:03:09,439 I've seen that commercial with the egg in the frying pan. 85 00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:11,441 Very effective. 86 00:03:09,522 --> 00:03:11,441 Well, 87 00:03:11,524 --> 00:03:13,818 since this is a high school, we don't have material 88 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:15,570 about giving birth on the shelves. 89 00:03:15,653 --> 00:03:16,905 But... 90 00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:19,073 since this is a high school, 91 00:03:19,157 --> 00:03:23,620 I keep a few things here under the counter. 92 00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:25,330 Excellent. 93 00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:26,497 And I'll let my brother know, 94 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:29,125 in case he gets himself in a pickle. 95 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:35,632 (exhaling rhythmically) 96 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,800 You're having a tooth pulled, not having a baby. 97 00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:41,137 If it can work for getting an eight-pound human 98 00:03:41,220 --> 00:03:44,140 through a birth canal, it can work for a tiny tooth. 99 00:03:44,223 --> 00:03:46,809 Eight pounds? I'm never having kids. 100 00:03:46,893 --> 00:03:49,604 ADULT SHELDON: Fun fact: she ended up having four. 101 00:03:49,687 --> 00:03:53,316 And if I do, I'm taking any drugs they'll give me. 102 00:03:53,399 --> 00:03:55,318 ADULT SHELDON: That part was true. 103 00:03:55,401 --> 00:03:56,486 (radio playing indistinctly) 104 00:03:56,569 --> 00:03:58,237 Hey, Georgie. 105 00:03:59,405 --> 00:04:00,990 I'm thinking about taking your meemaw away 106 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,325 for this weekend. 107 00:04:02,408 --> 00:04:04,661 Okay. You have my blessing. 108 00:04:04,744 --> 00:04:06,704 Thank you. And I was wondering, maybe, 109 00:04:06,788 --> 00:04:09,040 if you'd look after the store while I'm gone. 110 00:04:09,123 --> 00:04:11,042 You saying I'm the manager? 111 00:04:11,125 --> 00:04:13,711 No, I-I'm saying I want you to look after the store 112 00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:15,338 while I'm gone. 113 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,465 But in a managerial capacity. 114 00:04:17,548 --> 00:04:19,008 (sighs) 115 00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:20,677 You think you can handle it? 116 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,553 Yes, sir. I will make you proud. 117 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:23,680 Great. 118 00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:24,847 Can I fire people? 119 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,057 No. 120 00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:28,059 Can I get paid more? 121 00:04:26,140 --> 00:04:28,059 No. 122 00:04:28,142 --> 00:04:30,186 Can I at least change the music we play here? 123 00:04:30,269 --> 00:04:32,188 What's wrong with the music we play here? 124 00:04:32,271 --> 00:04:34,983 Nothing, it's just kind of grandpa music. 125 00:04:35,066 --> 00:04:37,860 Well, how is this "grandpa music"? 126 00:04:37,944 --> 00:04:39,529 Do you listen to it? 127 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:40,738 Yeah. 128 00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:43,324 Do you have grandchildren? 129 00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:43,324 Yeah. 130 00:04:43,408 --> 00:04:45,284 Do you see where I'm going with this? 131 00:04:48,579 --> 00:04:50,206 Okay, Sheldon, you ready? 132 00:04:50,289 --> 00:04:51,332 Not really. 133 00:04:51,416 --> 00:04:52,750 Yeah, that makes two of us. 134 00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:53,960 Why don't you guys come on back? 135 00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:55,920 You know what? I'm just gonna stay here. 136 00:04:56,004 --> 00:04:58,089 Um, you don't need me getting in your way. 137 00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,382 Oh, it's no trouble at all. Come on. 138 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:00,758 I've got my crochet. 139 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:02,343 You're coming. 140 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:02,343 Fine. 141 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:11,519 So, you don't need to worry about needles 142 00:05:11,602 --> 00:05:13,229 'cause we're gonna put you under for the procedure. 143 00:05:13,312 --> 00:05:16,149 No, thank you. There are risks associated with anesthesia. 144 00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:17,900 Feel free to jump in. 145 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,360 Are there any other options? 146 00:05:19,444 --> 00:05:20,570 Well, he could stay awake for it, but we'd have 147 00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:21,738 to give him novocaine. 148 00:05:21,821 --> 00:05:23,573 No needles. Just pull the tooth. 149 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:26,034 Okay. Just so you know... 150 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:26,034 (exhaling rhythmically) 151 00:05:26,117 --> 00:05:27,869 I'm gonna be using this. 152 00:05:28,661 --> 00:05:31,539 (loud, echoing banging) 153 00:05:31,622 --> 00:05:33,124 Drugs, please. 154 00:05:35,168 --> 00:05:37,420 You go to this casino often? 155 00:05:37,503 --> 00:05:39,088 Kind of. 156 00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,299 So don't be surprised if everybody knows my name, 157 00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:44,927 how I take my whiskey and the color of my lucky bra. 158 00:05:45,011 --> 00:05:46,137 Purple. 159 00:05:46,220 --> 00:05:48,056 No, that's my "get lucky" bra. 160 00:05:48,139 --> 00:05:48,931 (laughs) 161 00:05:49,015 --> 00:05:52,435 So, what are you into? Craps, roulette? 162 00:05:52,518 --> 00:05:54,604 Well, not much of a gambler. 163 00:05:54,687 --> 00:05:59,942 You just left Georgie in charge of your store, so... disagree. 164 00:06:00,026 --> 00:06:03,905 Mm, he's a lot smarter than you think. 165 00:06:03,988 --> 00:06:07,408 Maybe you're not as smart as I think. 166 00:06:07,492 --> 00:06:10,953 Well, if you like me just for my body, I'm okay with that. 167 00:06:11,037 --> 00:06:12,872 (laughs) 168 00:06:14,874 --> 00:06:17,960 ♪ If you could hear me think, this is what I'd say... ♪ 169 00:06:18,044 --> 00:06:20,755 There you go. I hope you enjoyed your shopping experience. 170 00:06:20,838 --> 00:06:22,131 I did. 171 00:06:20,838 --> 00:06:22,131 I'd let the manager know, 172 00:06:22,215 --> 00:06:24,759 but he already does, 'cause it's me. 173 00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:26,969 I'll take it. 174 00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,597 It's been a pleasure to serve you. 175 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:31,474 You might want to slow down. We don't have a license 176 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:34,102 to sell guns in here. 177 00:06:31,557 --> 00:06:34,102 (laughs softly) 178 00:06:34,185 --> 00:06:36,354 Just kidding, it's Texas. We got them in the back. 179 00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:39,315 Okay, Sheldon, we're gonna put the mask on. 180 00:06:39,398 --> 00:06:42,318 Now you just breathe normally and count back from 100. 181 00:06:42,401 --> 00:06:43,736 But counting back from 100 182 00:06:43,820 --> 00:06:46,155 isn't complex enough to occupy my mind. 183 00:06:46,239 --> 00:06:47,990 You're up again. 184 00:06:48,074 --> 00:06:52,161 Why don't you think of something more sciencey? 185 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:53,663 Like counting pi. 186 00:06:53,746 --> 00:06:55,540 That's a thing, right? Pi? 187 00:06:55,623 --> 00:06:58,459 I can't count pi, it's an irrational number. 188 00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:01,462 But I can embrace the spirit of your proposal and calculate 189 00:07:01,546 --> 00:07:02,839 the matrix coefficients 190 00:07:02,922 --> 00:07:05,007 necessary for a unified field theory. 191 00:07:05,091 --> 00:07:06,342 Do that. Hit it. 192 00:07:08,594 --> 00:07:10,805 (slurring): Of the four fundamental forces, 193 00:07:10,888 --> 00:07:16,060 the most difficult to unify is gravity because... 194 00:07:16,144 --> 00:07:17,562 (exhales) Oh, thank God. 195 00:07:19,272 --> 00:07:21,274 (carnival music playing) 196 00:07:24,402 --> 00:07:25,987 STURGIS: Step right up. 197 00:07:27,572 --> 00:07:29,657 Step right up 198 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:33,202 for your chance to meet Thoth! 199 00:07:33,286 --> 00:07:37,165 The Egyptian god of knowledge. 200 00:07:37,248 --> 00:07:40,376 He has all the answers. 201 00:07:40,459 --> 00:07:43,713 No question too big 202 00:07:43,796 --> 00:07:45,214 or small. 203 00:07:45,298 --> 00:07:47,592 Hello, young man. 204 00:07:47,675 --> 00:07:50,928 Do you have a question you'd like to pose? 205 00:07:51,012 --> 00:07:53,723 I do, but nobody in the history of science 206 00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:55,391 has ever been able to answer it. 207 00:07:55,474 --> 00:08:01,063 (laughs): Well, they haven't asked the great god Thoth! 208 00:08:02,315 --> 00:08:05,860 Right this way! 209 00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:19,707 Ask your question. 210 00:08:19,790 --> 00:08:23,252 Do you really possess all knowledge? 211 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,922 You only get one question, kid. 212 00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:27,924 You want that to be it? 213 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:29,926 Oh. No. 214 00:08:30,009 --> 00:08:32,762 How can I unify the four fundamental forces 215 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:34,263 of the universe? 216 00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:36,265 Now we're talking. 217 00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:40,144 In order to unify gravity, you must first understand 218 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:42,772 that it is a distortion of space-time. 219 00:08:42,855 --> 00:08:45,358 (mumbling): Gravity. Of course. 220 00:08:45,441 --> 00:08:48,277 He even talks in his sleep. Why am I not surprised? 221 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:49,320 (plastic clacking) 222 00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:53,324 Didn't feel it at all. That's how good this helmet is. 223 00:08:53,407 --> 00:08:55,368 Want to take a whack? 224 00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:58,204 Try it on. 225 00:08:58,287 --> 00:08:59,789 I'll be up front when you're ready to buy it. 226 00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:06,712 Oh, no. 227 00:09:08,714 --> 00:09:11,759 (exhales) Damn it. 228 00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:13,970 (roulette wheel spinning) 229 00:09:14,053 --> 00:09:15,513 MEEMAW: 26 for the twins' 230 00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:20,810 birthday, three for Georgie and Mary wouldn't like it 231 00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:24,939 if I used her birthday for gambling, so 13 for her. 232 00:09:25,022 --> 00:09:28,484 All right. For my grandson's birthday, I'm gonna go black, 233 00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:30,695 'cause I don't remember. 234 00:09:30,778 --> 00:09:31,737 No more bets. 235 00:09:33,864 --> 00:09:35,741 26 black. 236 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,952 (Meemaw whoops) 237 00:09:35,825 --> 00:09:37,952 Whoa! Yep! Hey-ah! 238 00:09:38,035 --> 00:09:39,537 Hooray for the grandkids! 239 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:42,164 Whenever the hell they were born! 240 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:42,164 (laughs) 241 00:09:42,248 --> 00:09:43,332 You want to go to the bar? 242 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:44,125 No, we've hit. 243 00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:45,584 We gotta ride this out. 244 00:09:45,668 --> 00:09:47,336 CROUPIER: Double zero. 245 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,547 Ride's over. 246 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:49,547 To the bar! 247 00:09:51,465 --> 00:09:53,426 (moans softly) 248 00:09:51,465 --> 00:09:53,426 (TV playing indistinctly) 249 00:09:56,053 --> 00:09:57,138 (muffled): Where am I? 250 00:09:57,221 --> 00:09:59,515 Oh, you died. You're a ghost now. 251 00:09:59,598 --> 00:10:00,975 What? 252 00:10:01,058 --> 00:10:02,810 MARY: Look who's awake. 253 00:10:02,893 --> 00:10:04,979 How are you feelin'? 254 00:10:05,062 --> 00:10:07,189 I had a dream. 255 00:10:07,273 --> 00:10:10,234 I solved a unified field theory. 256 00:10:10,318 --> 00:10:12,361 Well, good for you. 257 00:10:12,445 --> 00:10:14,363 But I can't remember it. 258 00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:15,531 Hmm. 259 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,533 Well, you were mumblin' something 260 00:10:17,616 --> 00:10:19,827 about gravity and forces. 261 00:10:19,910 --> 00:10:22,204 You need to be more specific. 262 00:10:22,288 --> 00:10:24,665 Shelly, you weren't makin' much sense. 263 00:10:24,749 --> 00:10:29,045 Mother, a unified field theory is the holy grail of physics. 264 00:10:29,128 --> 00:10:31,213 Solving it would be the greatest breakthrough 265 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,215 in the history of science. 266 00:10:33,299 --> 00:10:34,383 MISSY: And you forgot it. 267 00:10:34,467 --> 00:10:35,509 That's funny. 268 00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,891 Hello, Dr. Bowers, it's Sheldon Cooper. 269 00:10:41,974 --> 00:10:44,560 I need you to administer more anesthesia to me. 270 00:10:44,644 --> 00:10:46,729 No, I don't have a dental problem. 271 00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:49,357 I need to reenter a trancelike state so I can communicate 272 00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:50,900 with Thoth, the god of knowledge. 273 00:10:51,942 --> 00:10:54,570 I would argue that the greatest discovery in physics 274 00:10:54,653 --> 00:10:56,906 is worth losing your dental license. 275 00:10:56,989 --> 00:10:58,532 Well, it's not my fault you let them 276 00:10:58,616 --> 00:10:59,784 publish your home phone number. 277 00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:01,035 (line clicks, dial tone drones) 278 00:11:01,118 --> 00:11:03,746 Well, this is my favorite table here. 279 00:11:03,829 --> 00:11:08,334 Well, sure, every time you put down money, you win. 280 00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:11,962 Oh, this is nice. 281 00:11:13,005 --> 00:11:16,425 You know, I really don't get away from the store enough. 282 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:20,596 How come you're still workin' at your age? 283 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:21,597 What do you mean "my age"? 284 00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:23,057 I mean you're old. (laughs) 285 00:11:23,140 --> 00:11:24,558 I'm not old. 286 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:26,685 Well, I'm old and you're older than me. 287 00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:28,771 Yeah, that's true. 288 00:11:28,854 --> 00:11:30,439 But we make it look good though. 289 00:11:30,523 --> 00:11:32,108 You don't want to be that guy 290 00:11:32,191 --> 00:11:34,610 that just works till he drops dead. 291 00:11:34,693 --> 00:11:36,904 I mean, maybe you should retire. 292 00:11:36,987 --> 00:11:38,739 Have a little fun. 293 00:11:38,823 --> 00:11:40,282 Well, I'm here with you. 294 00:11:40,366 --> 00:11:43,411 That's a good start, 'cause I'm fun. 295 00:11:43,494 --> 00:11:45,079 Oh, man, you sure as hell are. 296 00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:46,372 (both laugh) 297 00:11:48,707 --> 00:11:50,459 Hey, you know what'd be fun? 298 00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:52,920 New Orleans is just an hour away from here. 299 00:11:53,003 --> 00:11:55,297 Oh, I like where this is headed. 300 00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:58,592 And they got themselves a 24-hour 301 00:11:58,676 --> 00:12:01,053 wedding chapel. 302 00:12:01,137 --> 00:12:02,847 What? 303 00:12:04,056 --> 00:12:05,975 (laughs): No! 304 00:12:06,058 --> 00:12:07,309 What do you mean "no"? 305 00:12:07,393 --> 00:12:09,437 We're good together and we're both old. 306 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,021 That's what you said. 307 00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:13,983 We-we haven't even said "I love you" yet! 308 00:12:14,066 --> 00:12:15,025 All right, fine. 309 00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,694 I love you. 310 00:12:20,114 --> 00:12:23,659 You... you're not gonna say anything back? 311 00:12:23,742 --> 00:12:25,744 Not under these circumstances! 312 00:12:29,748 --> 00:12:31,876 (mutters): Ah, goddang it. 313 00:12:33,252 --> 00:12:35,296 Dale?! 314 00:12:37,923 --> 00:12:39,633 GEORGE JR.: I'd like to report 315 00:12:39,717 --> 00:12:42,011 a robbery. 316 00:12:42,094 --> 00:12:44,513 Well, before I tell you my name, is there any way we can do this 317 00:12:44,597 --> 00:12:48,017 where the owner of the store don't find out? 318 00:12:48,100 --> 00:12:51,979 Because he left me in charge and I really screwed up. 319 00:12:52,062 --> 00:12:54,690 At least $400. 320 00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,484 I know it's a lot. 321 00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:58,194 That's why I said I screwed up. 322 00:13:00,779 --> 00:13:02,698 I got to think about this. 323 00:13:02,781 --> 00:13:05,367 I-I'll call you back. 324 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,703 ADULT SHELDON: If I was going to recapture my insight 325 00:13:07,786 --> 00:13:11,207 into a unified field theory, I needed to find a way 326 00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:15,044 to put myself back into an altered state of consciousness. 327 00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:17,004 Native Americans would 328 00:13:17,087 --> 00:13:20,049 sit in sweat lodges for hours to achieve this. 329 00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:23,761 I lasted a minute and a half. 330 00:13:23,844 --> 00:13:25,721 Self-hypnosis is another means 331 00:13:25,804 --> 00:13:28,557 of bringing stillness to the mind. 332 00:13:28,641 --> 00:13:30,976 (screams) 333 00:13:31,060 --> 00:13:32,895 When it isn't giving you a heart attack! 334 00:13:32,978 --> 00:13:35,731 The whirling dervishes of Central Asia 335 00:13:35,814 --> 00:13:37,566 employ a repetitive spinning technique 336 00:13:37,650 --> 00:13:40,945 to achieve a trancelike state. 337 00:13:41,028 --> 00:13:43,072 (retches) 338 00:13:45,491 --> 00:13:47,493 (TV playing indistinctly) 339 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,209 You didn't have to storm off. 340 00:13:57,628 --> 00:13:59,755 You're being childish. 341 00:14:01,298 --> 00:14:02,424 So I don't want to get married. 342 00:14:02,508 --> 00:14:03,759 It's nothing personal. 343 00:14:03,842 --> 00:14:06,929 Well, it feels personal. 344 00:14:07,012 --> 00:14:07,930 I'm not rejecting you. 345 00:14:08,013 --> 00:14:09,807 I'm rejecting marriage. 346 00:14:11,016 --> 00:14:12,977 If it helps, it's not the first proposal 347 00:14:13,060 --> 00:14:14,270 I've turned down. 348 00:14:14,353 --> 00:14:16,897 How the hell does that help? 349 00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:19,275 After everything that I've done 350 00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:21,402 for you and your family! 351 00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:24,154 You give my grandson a job, so I'm supposed to marry you? 352 00:14:24,238 --> 00:14:27,866 Well, you can forget I even asked. 353 00:14:32,246 --> 00:14:35,457 ADULT SHELDON: After my other attempts to return to the trancelike 354 00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:38,460 state of anesthesia failed, I turned to something 355 00:14:38,544 --> 00:14:42,089 Nancy Reagan herself told me to "just say no" to. 356 00:14:42,172 --> 00:14:45,426 My mind-altering substance of choice was... 357 00:14:45,509 --> 00:14:46,927 chamomile tea. 358 00:14:47,011 --> 00:14:49,305 But not your grandma's chamomile tea. 359 00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:53,517 A highly concentrated super chamomile of my own making. 360 00:14:53,601 --> 00:14:57,980 All the relaxing power of 30 cups of chamomile tea 361 00:14:58,063 --> 00:15:00,149 packed into a teaspoon 362 00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:02,484 of calming sludge. 363 00:15:02,568 --> 00:15:04,403 Sorry, Mrs. Reagan. 364 00:15:21,587 --> 00:15:23,589 (sighs) 365 00:15:25,924 --> 00:15:28,344 Okay, grand unified field theory, 366 00:15:28,427 --> 00:15:30,429 here I come. 367 00:15:35,934 --> 00:15:37,978 (groaning) 368 00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,907 This isn't working. 369 00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:52,534 MAN: I disagree. 370 00:15:52,618 --> 00:15:57,039 Seems to be working fine and dandy. 371 00:15:57,122 --> 00:15:59,667 Mr. Einstein? 372 00:15:59,750 --> 00:16:01,752 I'm very excited to talk to you, 373 00:16:01,835 --> 00:16:03,003 but I was hoping to hear 374 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:05,005 from Thoth, the Egyptian god of knowledge, 375 00:16:05,089 --> 00:16:08,050 so he could teach me the grand unified field theory again. 376 00:16:08,133 --> 00:16:10,511 Ooh, the grand unified field theory! 377 00:16:10,594 --> 00:16:13,097 Well, la-di-da. 378 00:16:13,180 --> 00:16:16,558 He told it to me in a dream, but I can't remember. 379 00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:19,520 All right, hang on. 380 00:16:19,603 --> 00:16:20,729 Where is the fun in finding 381 00:16:20,813 --> 00:16:23,065 things out if some joker with a bird head 382 00:16:23,148 --> 00:16:25,192 just tells you the answer? 383 00:16:25,275 --> 00:16:29,113 But a grand unified field theory would explain the universe. 384 00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:31,073 Answers are all well and good, 385 00:16:31,156 --> 00:16:33,909 but a real scientist loves the thrill of the chase. 386 00:16:33,992 --> 00:16:35,202 Am I right, Hawking? 387 00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:36,537 I would agree. 388 00:16:36,620 --> 00:16:39,373 I do also enjoy the thrill 389 00:16:39,456 --> 00:16:42,251 of rolling over bubble wrap with my chair. 390 00:16:42,334 --> 00:16:45,921 It-it is fun to pop that stuff, isn't it? 391 00:16:46,004 --> 00:16:48,590 So fun. 392 00:16:46,004 --> 00:16:48,590 But what if I never figure it out? 393 00:16:48,674 --> 00:16:50,092 I never did 394 00:16:50,175 --> 00:16:52,553 and my scientific career is nothing to sneeze at. 395 00:16:52,636 --> 00:16:54,430 Same here. 396 00:16:52,636 --> 00:16:54,430 Agreed. 397 00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:56,432 Uh, don't-don't look at me. 398 00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:58,767 I-I drive a Yugo. 399 00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,936 So none of you can help me? 400 00:17:01,019 --> 00:17:02,730 I believe I can. 401 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:06,316 Sheldon, if I was offered a choice between all 402 00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:09,403 the knowledge of the universe or the endless pursuit of it, 403 00:17:09,486 --> 00:17:12,030 I would choose the pursuit. 404 00:17:13,073 --> 00:17:15,451 That's very insightful. 405 00:17:15,534 --> 00:17:16,952 Hold it, hold it-- he didn't come up with that! 406 00:17:17,035 --> 00:17:19,288 He stole it from Gotthold Lessing. 407 00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:21,957 Who's-who's Gotthold Lessing? 408 00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:25,461 He's an 18th century German philosopher. 409 00:17:25,544 --> 00:17:26,837 Now do you mind? 410 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:30,299 We girls are trying to have some fun over here. 411 00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:31,967 Apologies. 412 00:17:30,382 --> 00:17:31,967 Sorry, Cyndi Lauper. 413 00:17:32,050 --> 00:17:33,135 Our bad. 414 00:17:33,218 --> 00:17:35,053 I-I like fun. 415 00:17:36,388 --> 00:17:38,390 ADULT SHELDON: While I made my peace 416 00:17:38,474 --> 00:17:41,310 with not having the solution to a unified field theory, 417 00:17:41,393 --> 00:17:43,479 my intestines did not make peace 418 00:17:43,562 --> 00:17:45,856 with concentrated chamomile syrup. 419 00:17:45,939 --> 00:17:47,483 Oh, dear. 420 00:17:47,566 --> 00:17:50,194 Bathroom emergency! Bathroom emergency! 421 00:17:59,286 --> 00:18:00,662 What the hell? 422 00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:03,248 I locked this. 423 00:18:04,917 --> 00:18:06,335 Who's here? 424 00:18:06,418 --> 00:18:08,504 I'll call the cops! 425 00:18:08,587 --> 00:18:10,088 It's just me. 426 00:18:10,172 --> 00:18:12,674 Why you back so soon? 427 00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:14,218 None of your business. 428 00:18:15,385 --> 00:18:16,720 How'd it go yesterday? 429 00:18:16,804 --> 00:18:18,180 It was good. 430 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,015 Until it wasn't. 431 00:18:20,098 --> 00:18:21,391 What do you mean? 432 00:18:21,475 --> 00:18:24,394 I was helping a customer, 433 00:18:24,478 --> 00:18:26,688 and I guess I forgot to close the register, 434 00:18:26,772 --> 00:18:30,484 'cause when I got back to it, all the money was gone. 435 00:18:30,567 --> 00:18:31,985 Are you kidding me? 436 00:18:32,069 --> 00:18:33,362 I screwed up. 437 00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:34,530 Did you call the police? 438 00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:36,156 I didn't want to get them involved. 439 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,867 But I was gonna make it right. 440 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:42,287 Here, take it. 441 00:18:45,666 --> 00:18:46,875 So we good? 442 00:18:47,793 --> 00:18:49,711 You're fired. 443 00:18:49,795 --> 00:18:51,380 R-Really? 444 00:18:51,463 --> 00:18:54,508 Get out of my store now. 445 00:18:59,012 --> 00:19:00,931 Captioning sponsored by CBS 446 00:19:01,014 --> 00:19:03,016 WARNER BROS. TELEVISION 447 00:19:03,100 --> 00:19:05,018 and TOYOTA. 448 00:19:05,102 --> 00:19:08,105 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 31570

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