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1
00:01:38,998 --> 00:01:43,909
-Evening, Carver of Graven Images.
-Homer the Thief. How's business?
2
00:01:44,169 --> 00:01:47,787
Been a little slow.
Not much to steal in the desert.
3
00:01:48,006 --> 00:01:53,380
Do not worry. We'll be wandering
out here another two weeks, tops.
4
00:01:54,429 --> 00:01:57,513
Zohar the Adulterer.
My wife sends her regards.
5
00:01:57,765 --> 00:02:03,186
-Yes, she's a good woman. Very good.
-Thank you, my lusty friend.
6
00:02:11,069 --> 00:02:15,197
-Moses is back.
-Quick! Everybody, look busy.
7
00:02:16,407 --> 00:02:21,033
The Lord has handed down to us
10 commandments by which to live.
8
00:02:21,286 --> 00:02:23,956
I will read them
in no particular order.
9
00:02:24,206 --> 00:02:29,033
-"Thou shalt not make graven images."
-Oh, my God!
10
00:02:29,252 --> 00:02:34,412
-"Thou shalt not commit adultery."
-Well, looks like the party's over.
11
00:02:34,632 --> 00:02:37,586
Hey, Moses. Keep them coming!
12
00:02:37,801 --> 00:02:41,051
"Thou shalt not steal."
13
00:02:42,097 --> 00:02:43,377
Sorry, Homer.
14
00:02:49,479 --> 00:02:54,389
That's the most dishonest thing I've
ever heard! I should box your ears!
15
00:02:54,650 --> 00:02:56,808
-You sneaky Pete!
-Easy, tiger.
16
00:02:57,069 --> 00:02:59,227
You, easy. Get off my property!
17
00:02:59,446 --> 00:03:02,447
Flanders, who put that bug
up your butt?
18
00:03:02,657 --> 00:03:06,156
I wanted to subscribe to the
arts and crafts channel.
19
00:03:06,369 --> 00:03:10,236
They sent this man to install it.
You know what he did?
20
00:03:10,498 --> 00:03:14,875
He offered to hook me up illegally
to every channel for $50.
21
00:03:15,085 --> 00:03:17,541
Boy, what's this world coming to?
22
00:03:17,796 --> 00:03:20,168
-That's exactly--
-Gotta go.
23
00:03:21,257 --> 00:03:23,416
Hey, stop, cable man!
Stop!
24
00:03:28,347 --> 00:03:31,514
-What do you want?
-I want free cable!
25
00:03:32,935 --> 00:03:35,805
This is okay.
Everybody does it, right?
26
00:03:36,062 --> 00:03:40,012
What? If you're having second
thoughts, read this.
27
00:03:40,233 --> 00:03:43,187
"So You've Decided
to Steal Cable."
28
00:03:43,444 --> 00:03:46,017
"Myth: Cable piracy is wrong.
29
00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:51,701
Fact: Cable companies are faceless
corporations which makes it okay."
30
00:03:53,703 --> 00:03:56,538
The clown that will last
a lifetime.
31
00:03:56,790 --> 00:04:00,834
Cable. It's more wonderful
than I dared hope!
32
00:04:01,043 --> 00:04:04,044
Don't you hate it
when you go to the toilet...
33
00:04:04,296 --> 00:04:06,538
...and there's no toilet paper?
34
00:04:08,425 --> 00:04:10,916
It's funny because it's true!
35
00:04:11,178 --> 00:04:14,629
Oh, hey! Family! Family, come here.
36
00:04:14,848 --> 00:04:20,221
I have an announcement to make.
The Simpsons have cable!
37
00:04:20,436 --> 00:04:21,385
Cable?!
38
00:04:21,645 --> 00:04:25,014
Right. 68 channels.
MTV for the kids.
39
00:04:25,274 --> 00:04:30,434
VH1 for us. 1600 hours
of quality programming every day.
40
00:04:30,695 --> 00:04:35,108
We've talked about cable before.
You think we can afford it?
41
00:04:35,366 --> 00:04:38,865
Nothing a month?
Yeah, I think we can swing that.
42
00:04:39,078 --> 00:04:40,655
Is this legal?
43
00:04:40,871 --> 00:04:42,614
Don't worry.
Look at this.
44
00:04:42,873 --> 00:04:47,036
"Myth: It's only fair to pay for
quality first-run movies."
45
00:04:47,294 --> 00:04:50,662
Fact: Most movies on cable
get two stars or less...
46
00:04:50,922 --> 00:04:53,673
"...and are repeated ad nauseam."
47
00:04:54,133 --> 00:04:56,706
-I don't know.
-Marge.
48
00:04:56,969 --> 00:04:59,886
Hear Me Roar,
the network for women.
49
00:05:00,097 --> 00:05:06,099
We'll teach you to lower your
bill by making your own Band-Aids.
50
00:05:06,311 --> 00:05:08,553
Oh, that's a good idea.
51
00:05:08,771 --> 00:05:13,018
Before we begin, you'll need
5 yards of sterilized cotton.
52
00:05:17,946 --> 00:05:22,489
Pro wrestling from Mexico.
Down there, it's a real sport.
53
00:05:22,742 --> 00:05:25,992
This is where Jaws eats the boat.
54
00:05:26,246 --> 00:05:29,163
Here, Die Hard
jumps through the window.
55
00:05:29,415 --> 00:05:32,250
This is where Wall Street
gets arrested.
56
00:05:32,460 --> 00:05:37,880
If I could call your attention
to the Subsidy Appropriations...
57
00:05:38,131 --> 00:05:42,460
...Override Bill.
I refer you to page 4500--
58
00:05:42,719 --> 00:05:44,592
They think people watch that.
59
00:05:44,846 --> 00:05:49,554
Live, from New Orleans. This is the
World Series of Cockfighting!
60
00:05:49,767 --> 00:05:53,515
Son of a gun, we'll have big fun
on the bayou tonight.
61
00:05:53,771 --> 00:05:57,982
We'd get there quicker
if I drove my dad's car.
62
00:05:58,233 --> 00:06:03,108
-Aren't you ready for church, Homer?
-Huh? What? Okay.
63
00:06:08,659 --> 00:06:11,743
Today's Christian doesn't think
he needs God.
64
00:06:11,954 --> 00:06:16,746
He thinks he's got it made.
He's got his hi-fi. His boob tube.
65
00:06:16,958 --> 00:06:19,200
And his instant pizza pie.
66
00:06:19,461 --> 00:06:20,955
Oh, pizza.
67
00:06:21,504 --> 00:06:27,340
Children, I don't want you to get
frightened but I must teach you this.
68
00:06:27,593 --> 00:06:30,344
Today's topic will be hell.
69
00:06:30,888 --> 00:06:36,012
I sat through mercy and forgiveness.
Finally, we get to the good stuff.
70
00:06:36,226 --> 00:06:40,852
Hell is terrible! Maggots are
your sheet, worms your blanket.
71
00:06:41,105 --> 00:06:45,897
There's a lake of fire burning
with sulfur. You'll be tormented.
72
00:06:46,151 --> 00:06:51,311
If you actually saw hell, you'd be
so frightened you would die.
73
00:06:51,531 --> 00:06:53,322
-Miss Albright?
-Yes.
74
00:06:53,533 --> 00:06:57,281
-Won't you eventually get used to it?
-No.
75
00:06:57,495 --> 00:06:59,950
-Yes.
-Are there pirates in hell?
76
00:07:00,164 --> 00:07:02,785
-Thousands of them.
-Oh, baby!
77
00:07:03,042 --> 00:07:06,909
So there's a downside
to the afterlife.
78
00:07:07,170 --> 00:07:09,840
How does one steer
clear of this?
79
00:07:10,090 --> 00:07:12,545
By obeying the 10 Commandments.
80
00:07:12,801 --> 00:07:16,300
Ten simple rules
that are easy to live by.
81
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:24,850
-What did you children learn about?
-Hell.
82
00:07:25,103 --> 00:07:28,721
I sure as hell can't tell you we
learned about hell...
83
00:07:28,982 --> 00:07:31,686
-...unless I say "hell."
-He has a point.
84
00:07:31,901 --> 00:07:33,016
Hell, yes!
85
00:07:33,236 --> 00:07:35,394
Hell, hell, hell, hell....
86
00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:41,734
Bart! You're no longer in
Sunday school. Don't swear.
87
00:07:45,497 --> 00:07:49,446
Hey, anybody up for a little
so-called pay-TV?
88
00:07:50,710 --> 00:07:54,659
-Are you sure this isn't stealing?
-Read the pamphlet.
89
00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:57,205
Hello, I'm Troy McClure.
90
00:07:57,424 --> 00:08:02,169
You may remember me from Cry Yuma
and Here Comes the Coast Guard!
91
00:08:02,429 --> 00:08:07,386
I'd like to talk about a candy that
cleans and straightens your teeth!
92
00:08:07,642 --> 00:08:10,393
A program-length advertisement!
93
00:08:10,603 --> 00:08:16,023
Wait a minute. I'm confused.
Did you say "cleans and straightens"?
94
00:08:16,233 --> 00:08:19,353
There's no confusion.
Just good science.
95
00:08:19,611 --> 00:08:23,478
Ladies and gentlemen,
the inventor, Dr. Nick Riviera.
96
00:08:23,740 --> 00:08:27,322
-Thank you, Troy. Hi, everybody!
-Hi, Dr. Riviera!
97
00:08:27,577 --> 00:08:32,915
Now, could I have a volunteer?
Somebody with crooked, yellow teeth.
98
00:08:45,218 --> 00:08:49,345
Come on, Lisa.
Watch a little cable with us.
99
00:08:49,597 --> 00:08:52,431
It won't cost you a thing.
100
00:08:52,724 --> 00:08:55,346
Except your soul!
101
00:08:56,686 --> 00:09:00,766
-What's gotten into Lisa?
-Beats the hell out of me!
102
00:09:11,074 --> 00:09:13,909
-What are you doing?
-What do you mean?
103
00:09:14,160 --> 00:09:17,031
-Remember the 8th commandment?
-Of course.
104
00:09:17,288 --> 00:09:21,120
Thou shalt not....
Covet...
105
00:09:21,334 --> 00:09:24,085
...graven images.
Something about covet.
106
00:09:24,295 --> 00:09:27,248
Thou shalt not steal!
107
00:09:28,924 --> 00:09:30,584
Anything else?
108
00:09:32,344 --> 00:09:36,092
Yes. I ate two grapes.
Please charge me for them.
109
00:09:36,306 --> 00:09:38,594
Two grapes? Who cares?
110
00:09:38,808 --> 00:09:41,844
-Just charge me something, please.
-Okay.
111
00:09:42,061 --> 00:09:45,892
I need a price check on two grapes.
You heard me, Phil.
112
00:09:46,106 --> 00:09:48,513
Two measly, stinking grapes.
113
00:09:49,151 --> 00:09:53,148
If you didn't catch it
in the theater or rent it...
114
00:09:53,404 --> 00:09:56,571
... we've got it!
On the Blockbuster Channel!
115
00:09:56,741 --> 00:09:59,825
Why is the world
a cesspool of corruption?
116
00:10:00,035 --> 00:10:03,321
Oh, great. All right,
what makes you say that?
117
00:10:03,580 --> 00:10:06,830
In Sunday school we learned
stealing is a sin.
118
00:10:07,042 --> 00:10:10,161
But everybody does it.
We're stealing cable.
119
00:10:11,462 --> 00:10:15,674
-Did you pay for your breakfast?
-No.
120
00:10:15,925 --> 00:10:19,044
-Did you pay for your clothes?
-No, I didn't.
121
00:10:19,261 --> 00:10:22,844
Run for the hills, Ma Barker,
before I call the feds!
122
00:10:23,098 --> 00:10:27,095
-I think that's pretty spurious.
-Well, thank you, honey.
123
00:10:27,310 --> 00:10:30,513
Friday night, live.
The ultimate matchup.
124
00:10:30,772 --> 00:10:33,891
The bout to knock
the other guy out.
125
00:10:34,108 --> 00:10:37,524
Watson-Tatum Two.
This time it's for money!
126
00:10:37,778 --> 00:10:41,194
-Oh, boy!
-Only on the Blockbuster Channel.
127
00:10:44,701 --> 00:10:48,994
How can one little insulated wire
bring so much happiness?
128
00:10:54,084 --> 00:10:55,495
Big fight coming up.
129
00:10:55,753 --> 00:10:58,919
Wanna come over and
listen to it on the radio?
130
00:10:59,131 --> 00:11:04,255
Okay. After the fight, we can
watch the still photos on the news.
131
00:11:04,469 --> 00:11:06,757
Not too shabby!
What do you say?
132
00:11:08,264 --> 00:11:10,505
We could do that, yeah.
133
00:11:10,766 --> 00:11:15,262
Or we could go over to my house
and watch it live on cable TV!
134
00:11:15,520 --> 00:11:18,806
-Get off!
-You're kidding me!
135
00:11:19,065 --> 00:11:20,892
Pass the pumice, please.
136
00:11:21,109 --> 00:11:23,434
He's Homer from sector 7-G.
137
00:11:23,653 --> 00:11:27,982
Excellent. I'm so keen on seeing
Watson vs. Tatum Two...
138
00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:32,783
...I'd even go to an employee's house.
I can picture it now.
139
00:11:33,036 --> 00:11:36,156
The screen door resting off
its hinges.
140
00:11:36,414 --> 00:11:40,791
Mangy dog staggering about
looking vainly for a place to die.
141
00:11:41,002 --> 00:11:43,160
-May I speak frankly?
-Yes.
142
00:11:43,379 --> 00:11:48,005
-You are quite wealthy.
-Thank you. Your candor is refreshing.
143
00:11:48,258 --> 00:11:51,010
Why don't you pay for
the fight yourself?
144
00:11:51,219 --> 00:11:56,973
The big fight is one of those rare
occasions that I savor the sights...
145
00:11:57,183 --> 00:12:01,346
...the sounds and the smells
of other men.
146
00:12:01,520 --> 00:12:03,643
You haven't lost the common touch.
147
00:12:04,106 --> 00:12:08,317
-So, Homer, I hear you got the fight.
-That's right.
148
00:12:08,527 --> 00:12:12,738
-8:00, my place. Come one, come all.
-All right.
149
00:12:12,947 --> 00:12:16,482
Moe, how come you never got
cable for the bar?
150
00:12:16,701 --> 00:12:20,319
Well, it was either cable
or the mechanical bull.
151
00:12:20,538 --> 00:12:23,207
I made my choice and I stand by it.
152
00:12:25,626 --> 00:12:29,705
-Somebody's having a party.
-Friday night. Wanna come over?
153
00:12:29,963 --> 00:12:34,459
No, thanks. I'm open 24 hours.
It puts great demands on my time.
154
00:12:34,676 --> 00:12:37,213
Too bad.
It'll be a great fight.
155
00:12:37,470 --> 00:12:41,847
The fight! I'll get my brother,
Sanjay, to cover for me.
156
00:12:42,099 --> 00:12:44,506
He deplores violence.
157
00:12:45,519 --> 00:12:50,145
If a man takes bread to feed his
starving family, that's stealing?
158
00:12:50,356 --> 00:12:54,484
No. It is if he puts anything
on it. Jelly, for example.
159
00:12:54,694 --> 00:12:55,974
I see.
160
00:12:56,237 --> 00:13:00,448
You're here for a reason.
Is your father stealing bread?
161
00:13:00,657 --> 00:13:06,197
I don't watch him every minute.
But we're getting cable for free.
162
00:13:06,538 --> 00:13:11,532
I'm afraid that is stealing.
I think you must do something.
163
00:13:11,751 --> 00:13:16,211
-Should I have him arrested?
-That seems like an ideal solution.
164
00:13:16,422 --> 00:13:21,582
But remember the 5th commandment:
"Honor thy father and thy mother."
165
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:27,797
I would like to see you
set an example by not watching...
166
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:31,675
-...the offending technology yourself.
-Thank you.
167
00:13:31,894 --> 00:13:37,268
You're watching Top Hat Entertainment.
Adult programming all day, every day.
168
00:13:37,482 --> 00:13:42,903
Except in Florida and Utah.
Coming up next, Stardust Mammaries.
169
00:13:45,198 --> 00:13:48,033
-Ay, carumba!
-Bart!
170
00:13:48,242 --> 00:13:52,322
-Here's what I was looking for.
-Blue chips closed up 3 3/4.
171
00:13:52,579 --> 00:13:54,987
Oil service stocks slumped....
172
00:13:55,207 --> 00:13:58,161
You shouldn't watch
that other channel.
173
00:13:58,418 --> 00:14:01,869
It's for mommies and daddies
who love each other.
174
00:14:02,130 --> 00:14:05,795
-Promise me you won't ever watch it.
-Okay.
175
00:14:06,008 --> 00:14:08,760
-Promise me.
-I promise I won't watch it.
176
00:14:09,011 --> 00:14:10,470
-Good boy.
-Hi, Dad.
177
00:14:10,721 --> 00:14:14,054
Stealing cable is wrong,
so I'm not watching it...
178
00:14:14,266 --> 00:14:19,141
...in the hope that others will
follow my example. Thank you.
179
00:14:19,354 --> 00:14:22,972
Hey, Lisa. Racing from Belmont?
Horsies!
180
00:14:23,232 --> 00:14:25,853
Sorry, I'd rather go to heaven.
181
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:30,227
There's something wrong
with that kid. She's so moral.
182
00:14:30,447 --> 00:14:34,231
Why can't she be more like...?
Well, not like Bart.
183
00:14:34,492 --> 00:14:38,490
-But there's gotta be a happy medium.
-Well, you know....
184
00:14:38,705 --> 00:14:41,326
Bart was looking at that
racy movie.
185
00:14:41,540 --> 00:14:44,826
And Lisa is losing
a little respect for you.
186
00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:48,999
Maybe we should think about
unhooking the cable.
187
00:14:49,256 --> 00:14:53,585
-Unhook it? But I love cable!
-Then you should pay for it.
188
00:14:53,843 --> 00:14:58,304
I can't afford it. When I can
afford to pay for it, I will.
189
00:14:58,556 --> 00:15:01,011
But I can't
so I'm not going to.
190
00:15:01,225 --> 00:15:05,009
Cable has become an evil presence
in our home.
191
00:15:05,229 --> 00:15:09,855
Marge, I never put my foot down
about anything.
192
00:15:10,108 --> 00:15:12,599
But I'm severely tempted
to do it.
193
00:15:12,819 --> 00:15:15,523
-No.
-I'm sorry, it's coming down.
194
00:15:15,780 --> 00:15:18,318
-No.
-It's coming down. That's it!
195
00:15:18,574 --> 00:15:22,986
It's coming down! The cable stays.
The foot has spoken.
196
00:15:25,122 --> 00:15:27,494
-Lemonade? Please.
-Seen it.
197
00:15:27,749 --> 00:15:30,454
-Cleans and straightens--
-Seen it.
198
00:15:30,668 --> 00:15:32,708
-Seen it.
-I was poor.
199
00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:35,755
Soccer. Seen it.
200
00:15:36,006 --> 00:15:38,046
-Simpson.
-How did you get in?
201
00:15:38,300 --> 00:15:41,135
Your door wasn't locked well enough.
202
00:15:41,386 --> 00:15:45,300
Would you be interested
in this stereo? A $500 value.
203
00:15:45,557 --> 00:15:47,596
You can have it for $40.
204
00:15:47,851 --> 00:15:51,136
-Get out! Criminal!
-I'll go see a neighbor.
205
00:15:51,354 --> 00:15:54,687
-He's not home!
-Even better.
206
00:15:59,528 --> 00:16:02,647
You sure about this?
Doesn't look friendly.
207
00:16:02,906 --> 00:16:06,156
Can't be too careful.
Thieves are everywhere.
208
00:16:06,409 --> 00:16:09,908
I'm not talking about
the small, forgivable stuff.
209
00:16:10,288 --> 00:16:13,988
Come one, come all!
Top Hat Theater is on the air!
210
00:16:14,249 --> 00:16:19,540
The most beautiful women! Just 50
cents! I'm your host, Bart Simpson!
211
00:16:19,796 --> 00:16:22,631
You must be at least
8 years old.
212
00:16:24,801 --> 00:16:29,925
And now The Top Hat Channel is
proud to present Broadcast Nudes.
213
00:16:31,557 --> 00:16:34,972
-Gross!
-Yet strangely compelling.
214
00:16:35,227 --> 00:16:37,468
-It's a raid!
-What the--?
215
00:16:39,981 --> 00:16:42,270
I know you. Come back here!
216
00:16:44,068 --> 00:16:48,611
You promised me you wouldn't watch
that trash. Go to your room!
217
00:16:48,822 --> 00:16:51,823
I wish I was an adult
so I could break rules.
218
00:16:52,075 --> 00:16:53,107
Oh, great.
219
00:16:56,204 --> 00:17:00,996
-I brought some imported generic beer.
-Thank you, Barney.
220
00:17:01,209 --> 00:17:04,992
-How many people are coming?
-Just a select circle.
221
00:17:05,254 --> 00:17:08,124
Hello!
I brought an assortment of jerkies.
222
00:17:08,382 --> 00:17:13,506
-Did you swipe those from work?
-Certainly not. What are you implying?
223
00:17:13,762 --> 00:17:17,261
There is no love lost between
these two warriors.
224
00:17:17,515 --> 00:17:21,014
We almost had a scuffle
today at the weigh-in.
225
00:17:21,269 --> 00:17:24,602
You have a special motivation
going into this bout.
226
00:17:24,855 --> 00:17:29,849
I want to dedicate this fight to
my manager, Vinnie, who got me here...
227
00:17:30,068 --> 00:17:31,443
...and then...
228
00:17:32,487 --> 00:17:35,856
-...passed away two weeks ago.
-Any response?
229
00:17:36,074 --> 00:17:40,237
I would also like to dedicate
this fight to this manager.
230
00:17:40,494 --> 00:17:42,202
-You can't!
-I can!
231
00:17:42,454 --> 00:17:45,455
You dedicate the fight
to your manager!
232
00:17:45,707 --> 00:17:49,372
I want to tell you
that I'm not watching this fight.
233
00:17:49,586 --> 00:17:52,705
It's my form of nonviolent protest.
234
00:17:55,299 --> 00:17:57,208
Hi, Homer. I brought you--
235
00:17:57,468 --> 00:18:01,679
Quick! It's Moe.
I gotta hide the mugs.
236
00:18:05,475 --> 00:18:10,220
Will you get--? Hey, go protest
outside, will you? Now!
237
00:18:12,482 --> 00:18:15,233
-Hi. I brought you a mug.
-Thank you.
238
00:18:15,484 --> 00:18:17,856
I always wanted one of these.
239
00:18:19,780 --> 00:18:21,689
Oh! Mr. Burns!
240
00:18:22,908 --> 00:18:26,442
-Hide the stuff I borrowed from work!
-Borrowed?
241
00:18:26,661 --> 00:18:30,243
-Okay, that stuff I stole from work.
-Oh, okay.
242
00:18:34,877 --> 00:18:37,996
Come on! Take all this.
Put it in the closet.
243
00:18:38,255 --> 00:18:40,828
Will you quit staring at me
like that?
244
00:18:41,758 --> 00:18:46,336
Hello. We were in the neighborhood
and thought we'd drop by.
245
00:18:47,847 --> 00:18:51,180
Hello, Mr. Burns.
Like to watch the fight?
246
00:18:51,392 --> 00:18:53,717
The fight! Don't mind if I do.
247
00:18:53,978 --> 00:18:58,224
Oh, Simpson. Good news.
I brought some munchies.
248
00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:00,681
Smithers, the Cheetos.
249
00:19:03,987 --> 00:19:07,854
In but a few scant minutes,
the anticipation--
250
00:19:09,700 --> 00:19:10,731
-Simpson?
-Yes.
251
00:19:10,993 --> 00:19:14,278
-You have an illegal cable hookup.
-No. No, l--
252
00:19:14,538 --> 00:19:17,788
It wasn't me.
It was my wife's idea. Yeah!
253
00:19:18,667 --> 00:19:20,077
Hey, hey, hey.
254
00:19:20,335 --> 00:19:21,877
Settle down, fella.
255
00:19:22,128 --> 00:19:25,082
We were hoping
we could watch the fight.
256
00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:27,788
Oh, sure, sure. Be my guest.
257
00:19:32,471 --> 00:19:36,338
-Here's lemonade for your protest.
-Thanks, Mom.
258
00:19:36,599 --> 00:19:39,719
-It isn't going very well.
-Don't give up.
259
00:19:39,978 --> 00:19:43,097
When you love somebody,
you must have faith...
260
00:19:43,356 --> 00:19:45,929
...that they will do the right thing.
261
00:19:46,483 --> 00:19:50,528
He learned how to fight
in the projects of Capital City...
262
00:19:50,779 --> 00:19:54,479
...and honed his skills while
serving time for assault...
263
00:19:54,741 --> 00:19:56,983
...in Springfield Prison.
264
00:19:57,201 --> 00:19:59,906
All right! A local boy!
265
00:20:00,121 --> 00:20:04,663
For 5 years, I was away from
my kids and their mothers.
266
00:20:04,875 --> 00:20:07,330
The conditions were irrevocable.
267
00:20:07,544 --> 00:20:12,419
Assault. Manslaughter.
Stealing cable TV!
268
00:20:15,301 --> 00:20:18,255
Marge! Lisa! Maggie!
269
00:20:23,517 --> 00:20:26,304
Shake hands. Keep it clean.
270
00:20:26,770 --> 00:20:28,015
Come on, boy!
271
00:20:30,231 --> 00:20:34,181
Excuse me.
I hate to interrupt your judging me.
272
00:20:34,444 --> 00:20:37,563
I've made a couple of
important decisions.
273
00:20:37,822 --> 00:20:41,605
Number one: I'm cutting the cable
when the fight's over.
274
00:20:41,867 --> 00:20:45,236
Number two: I'm not very fond
of any of you.
275
00:20:45,454 --> 00:20:47,660
-Back to the fight.
-Get down!
276
00:20:47,914 --> 00:20:50,321
We may have saved your soul.
277
00:20:50,541 --> 00:20:52,498
Tatum is reeling!
278
00:20:52,710 --> 00:20:55,995
Yeah, at the worst possible time.
279
00:20:56,672 --> 00:21:00,005
Eight! Nine! Ten!
280
00:21:01,802 --> 00:21:04,589
This fight is history!
It's done!
281
00:21:04,804 --> 00:21:08,849
A stunning knockout by a thunderous
punch in the 12th round.
282
00:21:09,100 --> 00:21:11,887
Tatum is the new champion
of the world!
283
00:21:12,103 --> 00:21:16,396
Everyone to my place for
squishies and microwave burritos.
284
00:21:17,357 --> 00:21:20,643
Best fight ever and I missed it.
285
00:21:20,902 --> 00:21:22,895
We're really proud of you.
286
00:21:23,154 --> 00:21:25,443
-What a donnybrook!
-Hogwash!
287
00:21:25,698 --> 00:21:31,487
I once watched Jim Corbett fight an
Eskimo bare-knuckled for 113 rounds!
288
00:21:31,745 --> 00:21:36,372
Back then, if it was less than 50
rounds, we demanded our nickel back!
289
00:21:37,250 --> 00:21:39,788
-Cable clippers.
-Here you go.
290
00:21:40,003 --> 00:21:43,122
-Go for it, Dad.
-I beg you to reconsider.
291
00:21:43,381 --> 00:21:48,339
Tractor pulls. Atlanta Braves
baseball. Joe Franklin!
292
00:22:04,734 --> 00:22:07,355
Third time's a charm.
9999
00:00:03,500 --> 00:00:05,000
Sync, Edited, Checked by Ikatz
24304
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