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1
00:01:26,452 --> 00:01:30,783
Live from Springfield,
the wrestling match of the century!
2
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:35,580
-Rasputin, the Friendly Russian.
-Wasn't he the Mad Russian?
3
00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:40,088
History has changed wrestling,
perhaps forever.
4
00:01:40,304 --> 00:01:45,596
The challenger from Heidelberg,
Professor Burnabon Brawn. With a "W. "
5
00:01:45,811 --> 00:01:51,353
Two titans in their prime. This is
going to be one hell of a match!
6
00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:54,440
I hope you're not
taking this seriously.
7
00:01:54,656 --> 00:01:58,276
5-year-olds know this is
as choreographed as ballet.
8
00:01:58,703 --> 00:02:03,497
Rasputin's got the reach, but
the Professor's got his coma lock.
9
00:02:03,710 --> 00:02:06,380
This is gonna be one hell of a match.
10
00:02:07,006 --> 00:02:11,835
Look at that showoff,
kissing his own muscles.
11
00:02:13,097 --> 00:02:16,966
He's spinning the Professor!
That's disorienting!
12
00:02:17,270 --> 00:02:20,141
Hey, Milhouse, crank it up.
13
00:02:22,193 --> 00:02:25,645
-That's my seat.
-Correction, was your seat.
14
00:02:25,864 --> 00:02:28,439
But I only got up to go to the can.
15
00:02:28,660 --> 00:02:31,864
I don't see your name
on this barstool.
16
00:02:32,081 --> 00:02:33,991
One! Two! Three!
17
00:02:34,209 --> 00:02:36,083
Four! Five! Six!
18
00:02:36,295 --> 00:02:38,537
Seven! Eight! Nine!
19
00:02:38,756 --> 00:02:42,209
The ref is issuing
a warning to Rasputin.
20
00:02:44,472 --> 00:02:49,183
Oh, my. Oh, my.
Why is this referee permitting this?
21
00:02:58,241 --> 00:03:01,741
This Saturday,
your life will be changed forever.
22
00:03:02,079 --> 00:03:05,496
Saturday, at the Springfield Speedway.
23
00:03:05,709 --> 00:03:10,088
"Crusher" Woodard, "The Skunk"
Trumane and the Dunk Masters...
24
00:03:10,340 --> 00:03:12,796
...in the Monster Truck Rally!
25
00:03:13,302 --> 00:03:17,384
Plus the amazing, unbelievable,
Truck-a-saurus!
26
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:23,058
Twenty tons and four stories of
car-crunching, fire-breathing insanity!
27
00:03:24,609 --> 00:03:27,943
One night only,
at the Springfield Speedway!
28
00:03:28,197 --> 00:03:33,739
If you miss it, you better be dead or
in jail. If you're in jail, break out!
29
00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:35,574
Be there!
30
00:03:45,053 --> 00:03:47,889
Truck-a-saurus!
31
00:03:51,728 --> 00:03:55,430
I have an announcement.
As a family growth thing...
32
00:03:55,692 --> 00:03:59,607
...we should go to the
Monster Truck Rally this Saturday.
33
00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:02,314
Aren't you forgetting something?
34
00:04:02,576 --> 00:04:06,195
Monster Truck Rally, growth thing,
I don't think so.
35
00:04:06,414 --> 00:04:08,408
Lisa's recital is Saturday.
36
00:04:08,667 --> 00:04:14,754
I have my first solo. If you miss it,
start looking for a child therapist.
37
00:04:14,967 --> 00:04:21,850
-But Truck-a-saurus is one night only!
-Cruel fate, why do you mock me?
38
00:04:22,102 --> 00:04:25,887
Come on.
What time does your truck game start?
39
00:04:26,357 --> 00:04:31,104
-8:00, but what does it matter?
-Lisa's recital starts at 5:00.
40
00:04:31,322 --> 00:04:35,820
-We can go to both.
-Marge, you're a genius!
41
00:04:36,037 --> 00:04:39,703
Let's have good assembly manners.
People! People!
42
00:04:41,502 --> 00:04:45,667
Quiet, please! Don't make me
flick the lights on and off.
43
00:04:45,883 --> 00:04:47,129
Thank you.
44
00:04:47,343 --> 00:04:52,636
Ladies, gentlemen, parents. Welcome
to the first in a series of concerts.
45
00:04:53,268 --> 00:04:54,727
Series!
46
00:04:54,937 --> 00:04:59,399
Tonight, Sherbert's--
Schubert's Unfinished Symphony.
47
00:04:59,610 --> 00:05:02,731
Good, unfinished.
This shouldn't take long.
48
00:05:02,948 --> 00:05:07,825
Remember, children, stay together.
Five, six, seven, eight!
49
00:05:30,818 --> 00:05:36,110
-That was beautiful. Can we go now?
-Sit down, Homer.
50
00:05:38,703 --> 00:05:43,117
How much longer was Sherbert
planning on making this?
51
00:05:43,793 --> 00:05:47,579
Lisa was great.
Her fingering's come a long way.
52
00:05:47,840 --> 00:05:52,504
-Thanks, Flanders. Big know-it-all.
-When's Todd's solo, Dad?
53
00:05:52,764 --> 00:05:55,718
It's coming up, son.
It's coming up.
54
00:06:08,117 --> 00:06:13,540
-My son, my son.
-Come on, Flanders. He's not that bad.
55
00:06:49,297 --> 00:06:52,049
-I reached him.
-Drive defensively.
56
00:06:52,301 --> 00:06:58,590
-The best defense is a good offense.
-Faster, Dad. Truck-a-saurus awaits!
57
00:07:00,437 --> 00:07:01,979
Damn, no spots!
58
00:07:02,189 --> 00:07:04,859
I think there's one over there.
59
00:07:12,995 --> 00:07:16,163
-Dad?
-Not now, Lisa. Come on.
60
00:07:16,416 --> 00:07:18,208
-Homer.
-What?
61
00:07:18,627 --> 00:07:21,748
-Truck-a-saurus!
-Where? Where?
62
00:07:40,907 --> 00:07:44,277
Pull! Pull, you dogs!
63
00:07:44,495 --> 00:07:47,912
Let's see, cracked windshield,
melted bumpers...
64
00:07:48,125 --> 00:07:51,993
...punctured radiator,
teeth marks in the trunk.
65
00:07:52,255 --> 00:07:54,581
At least there's no frame damage.
66
00:07:55,301 --> 00:07:58,469
-This check should handle it.
-Thank you.
67
00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:03,260
I'm Leo G. Clark, inventor
and operator of Truck-a-saurus.
68
00:08:03,478 --> 00:08:07,976
Truck-a-saurus feels
very badly about what happened.
69
00:08:08,235 --> 00:08:13,907
We'd like you to have a half-bottle of
champagne for being such good sports.
70
00:08:14,117 --> 00:08:19,540
Thank you. Everyone's so nice here,
at the Monster Truck Rally.
71
00:08:19,750 --> 00:08:22,456
Look, Homer, champagne!
72
00:08:25,132 --> 00:08:28,751
Now, Majestic Undercoating
is proud to present:
73
00:08:29,012 --> 00:08:31,421
Ms. Monster!
74
00:08:31,682 --> 00:08:34,139
Wow, a woman mud pool driver.
75
00:08:34,436 --> 00:08:39,146
Another barrier broken.
Right on, sister!
76
00:08:39,359 --> 00:08:44,153
Let the destruction begin!
Hey, they forgot my corn dogs.
77
00:08:44,366 --> 00:08:48,531
-Give me some nachos, Homer-saurus.
-Here, Bart-a-saurus.
78
00:08:50,457 --> 00:08:55,417
Now, we have a surprise guest.
The world's greatest daredevil.
79
00:08:55,714 --> 00:08:57,957
He's no stranger to danger.
80
00:08:58,218 --> 00:09:03,558
If he's not in action, he's in
traction. Captain Lance Murdock!
81
00:09:05,936 --> 00:09:09,805
Ladies and gentlemen,
and especially little children.
82
00:09:10,025 --> 00:09:14,819
I'm glad you're here to witness
what may be my grisly death.
83
00:09:15,073 --> 00:09:17,779
Tonight, my most dangerous stunt.
84
00:09:18,036 --> 00:09:23,032
I will death defy nature and gravity
by leaping over this water tank...
85
00:09:23,251 --> 00:09:26,087
...filled with great white sharks...
86
00:09:26,296 --> 00:09:30,924
...deadly electric eels,
ravenous piranhas, alligators...
87
00:09:31,178 --> 00:09:34,844
...and most frightening,
the king of the jungle...
88
00:09:35,100 --> 00:09:38,137
...one ferocious lion!
89
00:09:42,026 --> 00:09:46,239
I almost forgot.
To add a real element of danger...
90
00:09:46,490 --> 00:09:50,489
...one drop of human blood.
91
00:09:52,373 --> 00:09:55,707
On the chance I don't live,
let me say...
92
00:09:55,961 --> 00:10:00,007
...seat belts save lives,
so buckle up!
93
00:10:03,554 --> 00:10:06,971
This is so cool.
94
00:10:11,648 --> 00:10:14,140
Oh, I can't watch!
95
00:10:20,410 --> 00:10:22,118
He made it!
96
00:10:32,217 --> 00:10:33,878
Bitchen!
97
00:10:36,389 --> 00:10:38,881
He's okay, folks!
98
00:10:49,156 --> 00:10:52,443
What a fun-filled evening.
99
00:10:53,328 --> 00:10:57,577
Ladies and gentlemen,
a 10-year-old who's brave and bold!
100
00:10:57,834 --> 00:11:00,505
When he's not in class,
he risks his ass!
101
00:11:00,755 --> 00:11:03,923
The greatest daredevil,
Bart Simpson!
102
00:11:04,134 --> 00:11:05,677
Bart! Bart!
103
00:11:10,476 --> 00:11:14,771
Bart? Bart? We're home, son.
104
00:11:16,693 --> 00:11:22,116
-Dad, I wanna be a daredevil.
-Kids say such stupid things.
105
00:11:26,205 --> 00:11:28,958
-You're crazy.
-You'll never make it.
106
00:11:29,209 --> 00:11:32,081
Spare me your lectures, ladies.
107
00:11:39,139 --> 00:11:40,848
-Oh, no! He's hurt!
-Bad!
108
00:11:41,058 --> 00:11:43,764
Let's get out of here!
109
00:11:52,699 --> 00:11:57,327
-My little boy!
-Come on, Marge, we're mad at him.
110
00:11:57,580 --> 00:12:02,327
-Are you all right?
-Better than all right. I got stitches!
111
00:12:02,629 --> 00:12:04,040
Probably a scar too.
112
00:12:04,297 --> 00:12:09,341
Bart says he got hurt training
for a career in death defiance?
113
00:12:09,596 --> 00:12:12,598
Yes, we saw a daredevil last night...
114
00:12:12,851 --> 00:12:15,521
...and monkey see, monkey do.
115
00:12:15,771 --> 00:12:19,687
I know something that may
discourage this behavior.
116
00:12:19,943 --> 00:12:23,444
These children have
been hurt doing stunts...
117
00:12:23,698 --> 00:12:28,196
...they saw on television,
movies and the legitimate stage.
118
00:12:29,331 --> 00:12:35,086
This little boy broke his leg
trying to fly like Superman.
119
00:12:35,672 --> 00:12:40,585
His brother hit him with a wrench,
mimicking a TV wrestling match.
120
00:12:41,180 --> 00:12:44,799
I won't show the horrors
of our Three Stooges ward.
121
00:12:45,018 --> 00:12:48,305
I didn't know TV was
a dangerous influence.
122
00:12:48,690 --> 00:12:54,481
It's tragic, but it's a small price
to pay for top-notch entertainment.
123
00:12:54,739 --> 00:12:57,658
Amen!
Has Dr. Hibbert made his point?
124
00:12:57,910 --> 00:13:03,251
He certainly has. I learned a
real lesson. Thanks, Dr. Hibbert.
125
00:13:13,723 --> 00:13:16,131
-I did it.
-Wow! All right!
126
00:13:19,939 --> 00:13:21,814
Way happening!
127
00:13:22,067 --> 00:13:24,903
-Awesome!
-You're the king!
128
00:13:25,113 --> 00:13:29,112
Thank you! How about a hand
for these brave animals?
129
00:13:33,666 --> 00:13:36,419
Hi, kids. Thanks.
130
00:13:37,129 --> 00:13:40,214
Okay, field-trippers. Off the bus.
131
00:13:40,550 --> 00:13:44,169
-What's the matter?
-I'm running on empty, Milhouse.
132
00:13:44,430 --> 00:13:47,931
You kids like my jumps,
and I love you for it...
133
00:13:48,185 --> 00:13:50,060
...but it's too easy.
134
00:13:50,271 --> 00:13:53,357
There must be a challenge
worthy of me.
135
00:13:53,567 --> 00:13:56,688
Hi, children.
Welcome to Springfield Gorge.
136
00:13:56,947 --> 00:13:58,489
Wow!
137
00:13:58,783 --> 00:14:04,371
Gnarly! I bet you could toss a body in
there and no one would ever find it.
138
00:14:04,624 --> 00:14:08,872
Otto, I'm gonna jump
Springfield Gorge on my skateboard.
139
00:14:09,171 --> 00:14:13,122
As the only adult here,
I feel I should say something.
140
00:14:13,385 --> 00:14:16,672
-What?
-Cool!
141
00:14:26,945 --> 00:14:30,030
Hey, Otto! Can I use that microphone?
142
00:14:31,534 --> 00:14:35,783
Sorry, Bart-dude.
It's for emergencies only.
143
00:14:36,040 --> 00:14:39,375
-I wanna tell them about my jump.
-Okay.
144
00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:41,545
Attention, please.
145
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:45,334
This Saturday I'll be jumping
Springfield Gorge.
146
00:14:45,553 --> 00:14:50,513
There's a good chance I'll fall
to my death. Hope to see you there!
147
00:14:51,144 --> 00:14:54,644
Springfield Gorge! You'll be killed!
148
00:14:54,857 --> 00:14:59,686
I can't explain it, but I get the
same thrill from jumping stuff...
149
00:14:59,947 --> 00:15:02,569
...that you do from reading.
150
00:15:02,784 --> 00:15:06,830
Before you do anything,
there's someone you should talk to.
151
00:15:07,248 --> 00:15:09,288
Thanks for arranging this.
152
00:15:09,543 --> 00:15:13,494
Anything that decreases
entertainment-related injuries.
153
00:15:13,715 --> 00:15:17,928
You're meeting the world's
best daredevil, Lance Murdock.
154
00:15:18,179 --> 00:15:23,057
This is Lisa and Bart Simpson.
Bart's one of your biggest fans.
155
00:15:23,311 --> 00:15:26,978
It's an honor, Lance.
How you feeling?
156
00:15:28,819 --> 00:15:31,393
Doc, I heard a snap.
157
00:15:31,656 --> 00:15:34,693
I'm afraid it's broken.
That's all of them.
158
00:15:35,202 --> 00:15:37,824
I've broken that dozens of times.
159
00:15:38,081 --> 00:15:41,202
I bet you'd like an autograph. Nurse?
160
00:15:41,460 --> 00:15:44,213
-Who should I make it to?
-Just Bart.
161
00:15:44,464 --> 00:15:49,294
To Bart:
Thanks for visiting me...
162
00:15:49,554 --> 00:15:53,470
...at Springfield General Hospital.
163
00:15:53,727 --> 00:15:58,889
Your visit was a ray of sunshine...
164
00:15:59,109 --> 00:16:02,645
...on an otherwise cloudy day.
165
00:16:02,905 --> 00:16:07,035
Your pal, Captain Lance Murdock.
166
00:16:07,286 --> 00:16:12,495
-Wow, man! Thanks, Lance.
-You're welcome. Take this thing.
167
00:16:12,752 --> 00:16:17,462
My brother's gonna jump
Springfield Gorge on a skateboard.
168
00:16:17,675 --> 00:16:20,593
Could you leave me
with the kids, please?
169
00:16:21,263 --> 00:16:24,598
Let me start by saying,
good for you, son.
170
00:16:24,809 --> 00:16:27,480
Good to see kids
interested in danger.
171
00:16:27,688 --> 00:16:31,224
People will say you're nuts.
Maybe they're right.
172
00:16:31,485 --> 00:16:35,104
But the fact is:
bones heal, chicks dig scars...
173
00:16:35,365 --> 00:16:40,788
...and the U.S.A. has the best doctor
to daredevil ratio in the world.
174
00:16:40,997 --> 00:16:42,955
-But Captain Murdock--
-Thanks!
175
00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:47,000
You're welcome.
Tell the nurse it's my bath time.
176
00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:49,670
Another fringe benefit. Nurse!
177
00:16:49,884 --> 00:16:53,966
Springfield Gorge!
We settled this daredevil junk!
178
00:16:54,223 --> 00:16:57,558
-Squealer.
-Sorry, but if you got hurt or died...
179
00:16:57,811 --> 00:17:01,016
...despite the attention
I'd get, I'd miss you.
180
00:17:01,233 --> 00:17:03,938
-I forbid you to jump.
-You can't.
181
00:17:04,153 --> 00:17:07,737
I can and do! Go to your room!
There, I did it.
182
00:17:07,950 --> 00:17:12,115
I'm glad somebody stepped in
and put an end to this nonsense.
183
00:17:12,372 --> 00:17:16,952
You can tell me not to do it,
but you can't watch me 24 hours a day.
184
00:17:17,212 --> 00:17:22,457
And the minute your back is turned,
I'm heading for that gorge.
185
00:17:22,678 --> 00:17:28,136
He's got us. There's nothing
we can do. He's as good as dead.
186
00:17:28,352 --> 00:17:31,473
Homer, you're his father.
Reason with him.
187
00:17:31,690 --> 00:17:34,146
That never works. He's a goner.
188
00:17:34,360 --> 00:17:38,229
Come on, Homer, a heart-to-heart
talk with your son.
189
00:17:38,490 --> 00:17:43,617
-You've got to try.
-Okay, okay. I'll try.
190
00:17:44,498 --> 00:17:48,200
-Bart? What are you doing?!
-Nothing.
191
00:17:48,420 --> 00:17:51,541
-You were gonna jump the gorge.
-Maybe.
192
00:17:51,758 --> 00:17:55,757
Look, I know I can't stop you.
I can only ask you...
193
00:17:56,014 --> 00:18:00,891
-...to promise me you won't do it.
-Okay, I promise.
194
00:18:01,104 --> 00:18:03,311
-What?
-You didn't mean that!
195
00:18:03,524 --> 00:18:07,736
This isn't a promise
I don't expect you to keep.
196
00:18:07,988 --> 00:18:11,358
-lf you promise, you have to keep it.
-Why?
197
00:18:11,576 --> 00:18:15,657
If you don't,
I'll never believe you ever again.
198
00:18:15,915 --> 00:18:18,241
-Come on.
-I mean it, boy!
199
00:18:18,752 --> 00:18:23,748
Okay, Dad. I promise.
I won't jump Springfield Gorge.
200
00:18:23,967 --> 00:18:26,007
That's my boy.
201
00:18:26,554 --> 00:18:30,339
-How did it go?
-We got a pretty good kid there.
202
00:18:30,601 --> 00:18:34,102
Well, he's got a pretty good father.
203
00:18:39,196 --> 00:18:43,693
-Where is he? He said noon.
-He's just building suspense.
204
00:18:43,910 --> 00:18:48,704
-What a showman.
-Look, there he is!
205
00:18:56,302 --> 00:19:01,428
Hey, boy. Wanna toss the old--?!
Why, that little liar!
206
00:19:01,642 --> 00:19:04,929
I should have--
And I was gonna play pickle.
207
00:19:37,398 --> 00:19:38,809
Hey, what gives?
208
00:19:39,067 --> 00:19:44,655
I tried ordering you, punishing you,
and I even tried reasoning with you.
209
00:19:44,866 --> 00:19:49,114
-Now, I have to jump the gorge myself.
-What? Why?
210
00:19:49,330 --> 00:19:53,745
You'll see what it's like to watch
a family member risk his life...
211
00:19:53,962 --> 00:19:55,836
...for no good reason!
212
00:19:56,048 --> 00:20:00,510
-Dad, you'll never make it.
-Don't you think I know that?
213
00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:06,261
-Goodbye, son.
-Wait! Don't do it!
214
00:20:06,812 --> 00:20:12,235
-I won't jump anymore. I promise!
-Thank God! Thank God!
215
00:20:12,444 --> 00:20:15,115
-I love you, Dad.
-I love you too, son.
216
00:20:15,365 --> 00:20:20,574
I don't think I've ever felt as close
to you as I do right--
217
00:20:29,050 --> 00:20:30,842
I'm gonna make it!
218
00:20:31,094 --> 00:20:35,508
This is the greatest thrill of my life!
I'm king of the world!
219
00:21:17,155 --> 00:21:19,729
Think you got guts?
Try raising my kids!
18242
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