All language subtitles for Scusate.Se.Esisto.2014.iTALiAN.AC3.DVDRip.XviD-BG

Serena?

Well done!
Do a nice drawing, sweetie.

This is me, one year old
and only two teeth,

but I am already drawing
ambitious little houses.

Unfortunately my mother and aunt
didn't recognise my talent.

Darn it, you're wasting
all this paper, Serena!

Especially my aunt.
My name's Serena Bruno,

and I was born in Anversa,
but not the "Antwerp" in Belgium.

The one in Abruzzo.

The first to notice
my artistic talent

was my kindergarten teacher,
who impolitely exclaimed:

Bloody hell!
-Thank you, miss.

When I was 6,
1.132 people lived in my village.

A multitude.

Daddy!
-Jump on, darling.

While other little girls
were playing with dolls,

l was investing in real estate.

Crikey, that's amazing!
-Thanks.

At 11, the inhabitants
of Anversa had fallen to 645.

Many had emigrated
to Tagliacozzo, but not us.

Dad was a good bricklayer,
and being able to help him

was a real privilege.

When I reached 17, there were
only 450 people left in my village,

half of them my relatives.

News of my school-leaving exam
on graphics layouts

crossed the ocean
and as a prize

l received from Cupertino the first
Macintosh of the Abruzzo valleys

with a dedicationfrom
Mr Jobs. Doctor Serena Bruno.

l completed my degree
in Architecture before time,

and they still remember it in Rome.
And not only for my marks.

Well done, Auntie's darling!
#Don't show us up!

l set off from my Anversa
to acquire several MA's abroad.

Moscow.

Beijing.

Sorry!
#Dubai!

Washington! How proud her
father would be if he were still alive.

God rest his soul.

l now live in London, where l
selflessly work as an architect.

Every morning I head for the centre
where I'm in charge

of an important
construction site.

ln fact, I have worked on
a dozen, and I have to say

that they've all
given me a lot of satisfaction.

But a girl can't live
off work alone,

and the British man, l don't know
what you think, has his own charm.

Firstly, he's an evolved male...

who is highly civic-minded.

Darn it, all over my shoes!

But I have to admit,
that the weather in this city...

can at times be a little hostile.
A little damp at times.

With many downpours...

And stormy weather.

Or simply a constant drizzle
that can last for days.

Or weeks...
or even months.

But it's not always like that

l like to consider
the glass half-full.

Today, for example,
it's finally stopped raining!

EXCUSE ME FOR EXISTING

As everyone knows, living abroad

is an unusual privilege.

Yes, I think the time has come
for my next step.

Now I want to move ahead
with a revolutionary decision.

What have I said?

So here I am, in the wonderful
suburbs of our capital city,

ready to tackle
my daily journey through

what the locals,
with their admirable sarcasm,

call "The Triangle of Death":
Dragona, Capena, Morena.

My main activity in Dragona
is as an interior designer,

but only for exclusive
and very exacting customers.

The Alfa 495 wardrobe frame,

a fixed combination
with chromatic variations...

Whatcha talkin' about?
It sucks!

Please, give him what he wants,
he's only a child.

The bedroom is available with a long
cupboard on the left and sky blue doors.

I want a Batman bedroom!
-Sweetie...

we don't have Batman, unfortunately.
#l want Batman!

How many times must he tell you?

Here, number 4.

Do you like number 4?
-That's better.

Then you can put
Batman stickers all over it.

I'll take your order to the office.
#l have to run... bye.

My most important job
is in Capena,

where I'm designing a tomb

for one of the area's oldest
and most influential families.

Mr Tinozzi!

Good morning, madam.

I'm sorry I'm late, Mr Tinozzi.

Here's your project.

This looks like a crate!

You said you wanted
something grandiose.

I was inspired by dolmens, the first
great tombs in human history.

Since megalithic times...
-Mega what? That's no good.

I wouldn't be seen dead in it.

I wanted something richer,
more beautiful, much bigger.

An angel, a couple of cupids...
#Wait, I get it!

I've got the idea:
we'll have a nice arch,

with two putti at the sides...
#and a nice angel in the middle.

In solid gold.

With a sword, and written underneath:
"Here lies the Tinozzi family".

In Latin, you've heard of Latin?
#SPQR.

I like it, I like SPQR.

It'll say:
"Ad onorem perpetuum

familiae Tinozzae."

I'll design a tomb that'll make
the others drop dead with envy!

So to speak...

All right!

Really sorry!

ln the meantime
l'd used up all my London savings.

So, right now,
as busy as I am with commitments,

l am widening my horizons towards
new and stimulating activities.

Hi, I hear you're looking
for a waitress, here's my CV.

Give it to the boss, he's
on his way down. #Thanks.

What is it, my dear?

My CV.

Thanks.

Serena.

Look at her!
-She's riding a 1967 Ciao.

A collector would pay good money
for that. Leave it to me.

Excuse me!

Do you need any help?
-That'd be great, thanks.

I presume it's the spark plug,
but I'm not sure.

She presumes...
-We'll sort it out for you.

Thanks, you'd be doing me
a big favour.

We'll try and get it going for you.

Stop!
-What?

Crash helmet.

Crash helmet...
-Thank you. -No, thank you.

Bloody idiot!

My moped... stop thief!

Stop thief! Stop thief!

Stop thief!

Dad's moped.

Stop thief!

Hold it!
It's not pension day today.

What are you doing?
-I'll kill you, you know!

You're not likely
to kill me with some apples.

What do you want?
-Nothing.

I was looking for my moped
and I got disorientated.

You got what?
-I got lost.

Me too, help me find my stair,
come on hurry up.

Grab this bag, I'm getting too old,
I can barely walk.

I'm sorry I made you jump.
I'm dismayed.

Are you foreign?
-No, I'm from Abruzzo.

Really? Then grab these bottles
and move it.

I don't see the connection, if
you're from Abruzzo... #Move it!

Hurry up, I'm tired.
-Yes.

Get a move on, we're nearly there.

I'm coming.

COMPETITION FOR REDEVELOPMENT
OF CORVIALE'S EMPTY FLOOR

Hurry up, I have to make dinner!
-Right away!

How do you know
which stair is which in here?

I've marked it in green,
with my grandson's paints.

See the mark I put here
to find my way home? Come on.

See this other mark I put here?

Otherwise I wouldn't know
which flat is mine. See?

Come eat something.
-Really?

I'll whip something up for you.
A cake then, come on!

Come on!

What are you doing?
-Come here!

Three, two, one...

I dream of this at night.
-How long's he been divorced? -5 years.

And he's got a kid too.
-Can you imagine his wife?

I'd kill myself
if a guy like him ditched me.

I marked it in green
with my grandson's paints.

See the mark I put here
to find my way home?

You're awesome!

Where did you appear from?
-Anversa.

Nice.
-Anversa in Abruzzo, not Belgium.

I've travelled a lot but decided
to use my knowledge here.

And that's why
you came back to ltaly?

That's bloody stupid!
-Think so?

It's not as tragic as it sounds.

I've got an interview tomorrow,
a project...

And you work as a waitress.
-Yes, but...

I'm also designing a tomb.

Where?
#Capena.

Ennio Tinozzi,
"I Buy and Sell Gold since 2013."

How old's your son?
#Seven.

He's the best trouble
I ever got into.

But I haven't seen him much
since we separated.

My ex has moved outside Rome
with her partner and...

it's difficult when
you run a restaurant.

Oh God, my strap's broken.

Yes...

a restaurant owner's life
is a very tiring one.

With all those tables...

Here we are.

So this is where you live?

Yes, but not for much longer,
I'm looking for a place.

Here we are.

I've already said "here we are".

Thanks for the nice evening.
#Thank you.

Good luck with your interview.

Serena!
-Mum, Aunt, what the heck!

Know what I've been thinking, Mummy's
darling? #Seeing you're being evicted,

perhaps you could look for
a bigger place.

Now you have this important job...
#you're bound to find a husband too.

You're so pretty
yet you're still single!

Your boyfriends only last a day!

What did she say?
-That you can't keep a man.

I don't have time for that,
I'm working on this project.

You can't remain single.
-Who says I am?

You do have someone then?
#Who is he? What's he like? What's he do?

What's she saying?
-That maybe you have a boyfriend.

God, the Virgin
and all the saints willing!

All of them.
-St Anthony, St Paul, St Peter...

All the saints.
-All of them!

You were born in
Anversa? -Yes. #Good.

Right, you're part of our team now.
-Thank you. -Here you are, miss.

Just this little clause,
a mere formality.

A purely precautionary expedient.
#ln the event of catastrophic events.

Like floods, whirlwinds, meteorites.
#And pregnancies.

My resignation letter?
#Of course.

I find that totally unfair.

Next.

You should've kept your mouth shut!
Darn it!

See you tomorrow.
-Bye.

Why are you still here?
-Almost done.

What about the interview?

No, eh?
#Come with me, come on.

Don't be scared.

Franciacorta 1996,
awesome vintage.

Sit down.
-Thanks.

Let's toast. -To what?
#Let's toast to the non-job.

Yeah, sure!

This is great, this is the first time
I've sat down all day.

Come here.
-What are you doing? -Relax.

Okay, I'll relax...

Bloody hell, that's lovely!

My life was a sham and I said:
"What are you doing?"

I spoke to my wife
and told her the truth.

She'd already realised.

I resigned and bought this place
with my severance pay.

And now I lead life
the way I want to.

My dad used to say the same thing.
-What?

Life runs away from you,
so go and grab it!

Go and grab it!
-That's right.

Here we are again.

Listen...
-I'd like to ask you something. -Yes.

But you might be busy.
-No, I'm free.

I haven't told you what day yet.
-What day? -Saturday. -I'm free.

Would you like to come to a party?
-Yes.

I do.

Two mojitos.
-Thanks.

Excuse me a sec.

Hi!

Want another one, darling?

What's wrong?
-You didn't tell me you were gay.

I told you my wife had realised
that our marriage was a sham!

Why were you so nice to me?
#Sorry, I'll slap you next time, okay?

And that wine?
Corta-whatever 1984...

Franciacorta 1996,
an awesome vintage!

You expect me to believe
you'd open a Corta-whatever...

Franciacorta.
-Whatever! Just for a friend?

Of course.
-And when you want to make love?

I go to a dark room.
And you say "screw".

Because that's what you wanted
from me!

Next time I'll write it
on my forehead. "I'm queer".

Or I'll wear high heels
and a feather boa.

You may have left your wife,
but your life is still a sham.

You may have travelled the world
but you're still narrow-minded.

Go fuck yourself!
-You go fuck yourself!

What do you want?
I don't need anything! Go away!

I carried your water, remember?
-The girl from Abruzzo?

Yes.
-Hello, come in and have a bite.

This place was never finished.

They were supposed to build
a cinema, supermarkets,

shops, chemist, a post office...

Everything,
but they never did anything.

Have a roulade. Just one.
-No, that's enough.

Just one, go on!

I'm full, I can't manage another.
#Have a drop of wine.

I'll have some wine
but I can't eat another artichoke.

I wanted to ask you:

what would you like to have most
nearby?

I don't want to be posh,
but I'd like...

a quiet place for us ladies

where we can chat,
keep each other company.

And I'd like to take
my grandchildren out to play,

but I'm afraid they'll get tetanus
with all the rubbish outside.

Come on, eat up.
-Mrs Antonietta...

Don't be offended, but do you know
how I could find a stolen moped?

Who's offended? Wait!

Boccino!
#Boccino?

Mrs Antonietta...

says there's the possibility...

of asking you about a moped.

Bye.

Serena?
-She can't work today either.

Don't worry,
I'm not going to propose.

Come in.

I'm embarrassed,
I behaved like a fool.

No, I didn't explain it properly.

Can I ask you something?
Why are you living here?

Because it's cheap. -No kidding.
#lt was cheap, I'm being evicted.

Who's moving in?
-A family from Chiapas.

Have a seat.

Now tell me something:
why were you being so nice to me?

Because I like to wipe your face,
you're like a five year old.

The pizza.
#Because you dress awful and don't care.

Because you're clumsy.
#You're all wrong.

And you're perfect that way.

You won't believe it,
but since I separated,

it's been easier to find someone
to sleep with than talk to.

No, I believe that!

Is this the project
you were telling me about?

How can you work in here?
-I can't, in fact.

In ten days I have to hand it in...

but it's no use, they'll want
to hire a man for a job like this.

One problem at a time.

The project's more important,
as for lodgings, you can stay with me.

It's only temporary,
don't get any ideas.

Not even a little kiss?

You didn't feel anything?
#Just asking...

Okay.

Excuse me, girls,
I'm an architect,

I'm working on this project.
It's a long story...

Can I take your photo? -A
photo? -A photo. -Go ahead.

Thanks, you carry on studying...

Carry on studying.

Thanks a lot, girls. Bye.
-Bye.

Weirdo!
-A photo...

Is that all you've brought?
-And some work things.

When did you get here? -Just now.
-And when are you leaving? -Tonight!

Serena's got a nice boyfriend.
-Mum! #They've moved in together.

Mum! -He's so handsome, Clementina,
he looks like that actor...

Brad Pitt. -Taller. -George
Clooney? -No, more handsome.

Show her his photo. -Not again.
#Let me see, Auntie's darling!

What did she say? -That she'd like you
to bring him here so we can meet him.

When will you bring him here?
-Soon, Auntie.

Soon, I'll introduce you soon.
-All right. -All right?

All right.

How do I look?

Go and grab them!

You and I are just wasting our time
you know?

They'll never put a woman
in charge of such a big job,

they'd rather hire an idiot like him.

Scruffy, with hairy ears...
#Look at him, lanky...

If we're lucky they'll let us choose
the curtains and tiles.

Architect Serena Bruno.

Yes... that's me.

Go on.

The real problem is updating
the cadastral map...

It's not right that the gardens
include...

Good morning.
#lt's absurd there's so much...

Excuse me for existing.

Good morning.
-Good morning.

Good morning, where's
Architect Bruno Serena?

What do you mean?
-Mr Bruno Serena, where is he?

Darling...

Did you buy any diet Coke?

Snacks!
#How did the interview go?

I haven't heard from them yet.
#By the way, this is...

Marco... come on.
#Hurry up!

Does no one wear a shirt
in this place? A dressing-gown...

A bed jacket...

This one isn't bad.

Cute.
-No, he's hot!

The best are Taurus75
and Footlicker78.

To be honest, they look the same to
me. #Serena, this one or that one?

Not the one in short socks.
#This one's cute.

Or this one, he's not bad...
#COMPETITION RESULTS.

Perfect... Serena?

Serena, are you okay?

Oh God, they've hired me!
-Fantastic!

You see, things aren't as bad
as they seem in ltaly, after all.

What's wrong?
#There's something I didn't tell you.

Where is Mr Bruno Serena?

He's in Japan.

In Osaka, he returns
at the end of the month.

I'm his assistant.

I'm the assistant of Bruno Serena,
the architect.

I've come to show you his project.

What did you do?
-You said so yourself...

"go and grab it", that was the only way!
#Pretending to be your own secretary?

Assistant.
#l just did what they expected,

a male architect with a female
secretary. #Here you are.

Right...
#These are the aerial plans

that I will show you
if you can please move this.

Here...
#straighten it out or you can't see.

The details of the water supply
and the experimentation...

110 families living
in 15 types of housing units,

type A2, A/p, A/b, B1,

B1/p,
B1/b1, B1/b2, B1/b3,

type B2, B2/b...

This is the survey done on the spot.
There you are.

You're terrible!
-This is an important project!

What do you intend to do?
-What do I intend to do?

It takes three weeks to go from
the preparatory to operational stage.

I have to hold out for three weeks.

But what if they find out
you're Bruno Serena?

No, because after three weeks...
there's no going back.

The town authorities must decide
and construction begins.

21 days, and it's done.

And what has this secretary
ever done? Who is she?

I've messed up big time!
-That's right!

What'll I do now?

Do I go to the police?
I'll go to the police.

Shall I call them?
-No... wait!

We need some smoke.
-Yes, what shall we burn?

A joint, you fool!

Right, a secretary has to be a
determined woman. -Yes. -Stiletto heels.

And an animal print outfit.

What's that? -A leopard mixed
with tiger and zebra. Take a drag.

May I help you?
#No, are you crazy?

I'm a secretary, not Beyonc�.

What a bore!
Let's play with your name then.

Daphne, spelt with "ph".
-No one would fall for that.

Louise Veronica, like Madonna...

She's from Pacentro, not far
from my hometown... but no.

Hello.
#l've got it.

My name's Giulia Conti. -Giulia Conti...
#Assistant to Architect Bruno Serena.

What an old-fashioned name!
-Second floor, they're expecting you.

You don't like it?
-No.

Excuse me,
is this Mr Ripamonti's office?

Yes, Mr Ripamonti's office is...

Paragraph 4 in the contract.

No, read it again, and take a look

at the article concerning the penalty,
you might change your mind.

Antonio? We need a table
for 15 tonight, not 10. Thanks.

Good morning, crew. -Good
morning, sir. #Good morning.

Michela, thank you for existing.

Denise, you're in great shape.
-Thank you, sir.

Come on, Juventus!
-Yeah!

How much damage did you do
last night, Volponi? Girls...

don't let Casanova distract you.
-No, sir. -I'm innocent.

Frangipane! Any news?
-No news is good news.

Well done! I was forgetting,
cancel dinner tomorrow.

How many times have l...
-I adore you, thanks for existing.

But do it.
Phone and cancel it.

Excuse me,
I'm Bruno Serena's assistant.

Yes, you can have that desk.

What's up, Serena?
-Guess where I am.

Where? -In the office, at my
desk. -They all fell for it. -Hi.

Hi. -We've met before. -No! Where?
-At the presentation of the project.

The lanky idiot with hairy ears...

Lanky... ah, yes, of course.

What are you doing here?
-I work here, I'm an architect too.

Though right now I'm handling
scans. -Prints. -Photocopies.

I even printed out your project,
or what I thought was your project.

That's right.
-I really liked it.

The green kilometre's a great idea.
-Thanks.

When's he coming? I can't wait
to meet him. -Who? -Bruno Serena.

The architect.
-Of course.

Not before the end of the month...

Strange, they're organising
a video conference for Tuesday.

Get off, I'm not a ski lift!
#Please, I'm begging you!

I don't look good on webcams, right?

Tell her.
-Yes, they make you look older.

Look older? Fatter, you mean.

Excuse me for existing.

Who's this?
-Pleased to meet you, I'm Nicola.

Cute, eh?

He is cute.

But I'm not doing it,
I know nothing about architecture.

I'll give you instructions via web
from the conference room.

All you have to do is read
what I write and smile at the screen.

You are capable of reading
and smiling at a screen?

Where from? Do you want
to recreate Japan in here?

Be careful with these.
-Only because it's you. -Thanks.

We'll put the "screensy" here.
-The "screensy"?

Here. -Thanks for your help. -We'll
put the bonsai here. -Can you manage?

Get these panels up.
-This goes here. -Here we are.

Pull your pants up! -Don't like
it? -No, I don't. -Obnoxious.

You're obnoxious.
The flowers here.

Wait.
-Let me see.

Now for the computer.

Move out of the way.
#lt works.

Will you move, please?
#l want to see the background.

I think that's a little...
-More of a fantail? -Fantail!

Is that okay? -It's fine for
me. -Well? -Let's try it out.

I'll write and you read.
-Go on.

"Redeveloping the empty floor
of the Corviale building...

Redeveloping the empty floor of
the Corviale building, means...

Looking for new forms of communal...
-Read it properly.

Redeveloping the empty floor of the
Corviale building means looking for

new forms of communal spaces.
#How about the Great Wall?

What do you think? -It's in
China! Get out! -Thanks. -Go on.

The green area is a place
where people can meet...

Put your hand down.
#A study room, a play room...

A centre for...
-The elderly.

I don't believe it!
-What's up?

Another grey hair,
can you believe it?

This looks very Japanese,
you have to use this.

Put that cat back
or I'll chop your hands off.

You're so aggressive.
-Go on!

I can't go ahead with this.
-Yes, you can!

Shoulders straight and keep
your hands down. #Be manly!

Remember: you've a wife and 2 kids.
-Yes.

Just one thing, I beg you...

Don't overdo it.
-Me?

Here he is! Good morning.

Sorry, this sushi is delicious.

Good morning.
#"Put that sushi down!"

Pleased to meet you.
How are things in... Osaka?

Fine. -Redeveloping the empty
floor of the Corviale building

means looking for new forms
of communal spaces.

"At least say hello!"
-Good morning. -Good morning!

Redeveloping the empty floor
of the Corviale building means

Iooking for new forms
of communal spaces.

The green area is a place
where people can meet.

The projects will be funded
in full by circumstances that...

Forgive me, it's my daughter.

Little Louise Veronica.
My wife's a Madonna fan.

"Get back to the project or I'll
kill you!" Now, where were we?

"The morphology." -Yes, the "formology"
of the block. -What did he say?

The "formology of the bloke",
the block...

"Morphology of the block."
-The formol... -The morphology...

There must be a technical issue.
#With the broadband.

Yes, what the architect
is trying to say

is that the morphology of the building

consists of apartments
that are very small,

in which often
very large families live.

This is the purpose
of the green kilometre:

to supply them
with the necessary facilities.

We'll start with the centre where
grandparents can look after grandkids

in a safe place.
Then the young people.

A section of the green area
will be set aside for study rooms...

How do you intend to pay
for these communal areas?

Let's get to the point,
how will you fund them?

They will be financed
by the commercial activities,

without laying any more concrete,
but with the aim of salvaging...

Good, thank you.
-The list of amendments. -I know, Michela.

Stop butting in or you can sit
at the back of the class.

In fact, would you mind
getting some water?

Some still, some sparkling,
and some effervescent.

Go on! Thank you.
#Right, Mr Serena...

if you could let us have the
amendments as soon as possible.

The amendments... yes, of course.
#They're all ready.

"THE BACKGROUND"
The background...

What's going on? -Mr Serena, just
as a reminder, are you still...

The local authorities...
-I know! The local authorities

have arranged a meeting
very soon.

Ladies, get your knives sharpened!

l grind knives, scissors,
dressmaker's scissors!

Ham knives!
-Ladies! -It's my phone.

My ring tone.

I miss ltaly so much
I downloaded this ring tone.

It's your project, isn't it?
-No.

Such a cool project
can't belong to that idiot!

It's not fair! Same old story,
you do the work, he gets the credit.

It's not what you...
-Don't stick up for him.

We're all in the same boat here.
-I don't think so.

I can imagine Bruno Serena, third
generation of architects, easy life.

He's worked very hard too,
his father was a builder...

Yes, with an office
in Piazza di Spagna.

To start with, Bruno Serena is from
Anversa. #Native French speaker, chic!

It's cool to hire a Belgian here.
-No, Anversa in Abruzzo.

A village of 300 inhabitants,
in the middle of the mountains.

For five years Bruno Serena

commuted two hours by bus
to university.

With deep snow in winter.
#Because Mum and Dad, God rest his soul,

couldn't afford
an apartment in Rome.

So I wouldn't call that an easy life.

I see you're very close.
-You've no idea how close!

I won't judge, but a word of advice:
they never leave their wives.

You've got the wrong idea!

And it's none of your business!

Go and do some printing!

Yeah, at least another hour.
Don't wait for me.

Yes...

Two exercise books with lines, one
with squares and a saw for plywood.

The past perfect
of the verb arise?

I don't know, honey,
isn't Daddy there?

Remember to change the cat litter.

Is this Mr Ripamonti's family?
-Yes.

Look how pretty Anna is, I've known
these rascals since they were born.

This is Angelica,
she's sitting her diploma this year.

This is little Tommaso he's in
6th grade. #He's a picky eater.

They're very affectionate,
I'm like an aunt to them.

See you tomorrow.
-See you tomorrow.

Admit it, they're crazy about me,
I won them over.

That idiot Nicola saved us, and that's
saying something. #Yeah, all right...

Who can that be?
-Slave72. -Who? -Slave72!

You go and open it,
I'm not ready yet.

I can't let Slave72
see me like this.

Come in, Francesco will be right with
you. #l don't think he's expecting me.

Slave72?
-Ex-wife '74.

And you are? -I live
here. -But... -No, no!

Francesco! -Just a sec.
-No, come here! -What's up?

Hi.

Hi. -I need to talk about our
son. #l'll leave you to it.

Come in.
-Japan?

What are you up to?
-Nothing. What's up?

I want you to mind your son.
-The restaurant's open all day,

how can I take him
to swimming lessons and school?

I've never asked you for anything,
so I need... -I'll go! -How can I?

The same way I have for six years,
figure it out.

But with the restaurant...
-Slave72. -Please come in.

You can't change your habits...
-No!

It's a job, not a habit.
-No, I can see that...

Wait in the kitchen, please.
Listen carefully...

Can I get you some tea?
-Thanks. #l've just brewed some.

Even when we were married, you
boasted you were a hard worker!

Was he hetero once?
-Yes, but a long time ago.

You can't make me out
to be a monster!

It's because you're a good father
that I'm sorry.

Does he have a kid too?
-How much sugar? #Two.

You persuaded me to call him Elton.
-Elton?

Like Elton John. What about it?
-Ask him what his schoolmates say.

So he's bisexual?
-No! I wish...

It's only for 15 days.
-I can't. -I have a life too, you know.

A couple of biscuits?
-I shouldn't, I'm on a diet.

No! You're just big boned!
-Think so?

It's a chance to spend time
with your son, for 15 days.

You could tell him the truth.
-Wait!

You haven't told your
son you're gay? #No!

The kid has a right
to know the truth.

Shut up, go and tie yourself up. -No,
I won't. #Please, don't you start now.

I'll be going. -I'll see you
out. -Wait! -Bye, Serena, thanks.

Try and convince him.
#Bye.

She's right.
-You're one to talk!

Have you told them the truth
at work?

Are you a lesbian? -No, at the
office... #l'm a secretary to myself.

Of him, who's pretending to be me
as a man, right?

No, sorry, this is too much
even for me.

I'm off, I start my shift
at the Ministry at 3:00.

A bunch of crazies in here!
#l'm never coming back.

I know, you're right.
#l have to tell him.

But you have to help me.

No.
-Serena, please.

Please.
-I'm not being your girlfriend.

Wait a minute.

You scratch my back...

and I'll scratch yours.

Right... -First of all I
don't want him to be scared.

I'd like him to feel reassured.

A father, a partner,
and a comfortable home.

A normal life.

I'd left it in the kitchen.
-The merman too? -Desperate Housewives.

The Greeks...
-Get rid of them too.

"Gone With the Wind"? -What's wrong
with that? #To be on the safe side.

"Sex and the City"? -Toss
it. #Get rid of "Glee".

This artwork of two backsides...

We'll never pull it off.
-Don't worry.

Just calm down,
he's a 7-year-old child.

And he's your son,
I'm sure he's a sweetie.

In fact, you know what? I think
we'll have a lot of fun together.

How was your day at school?
-Nothing special.

Nothing special.

You're studying with the older kids
this year?

The party's over!
-What are the teachers like? -Yeah?

Nothing special.

Dinner's ready!
-Dinner's ready, dear. -Okay.

Yes, dear.

A little bird told me you love
tomatoes stuffed with rice.

Delicious!
#Right? What do you think?

Nothing special.

Good!

Very good!

Darling, the tomatoes.

Why don't you come and get them?
-You're here, bring them over.

Let's not argue, dear.
-Why not?

Why not?

Of course I'll get the tomatoes.
-Careful, it's hot.

Stay where you are.
-The tomatoes.

Here they are, these tomatoes...

are made with tomatoes and rice,

and rosemary, which isn't right,
but she's from Abruzzo.

Done, darling?
-There!

Amazing!
-Come here, dear.

Pass me your plate, dear.
-My plate...

Where are you going?
-To work.

I took half a day off yesterday
for this play acting.

I have to do some surveys with Pietro,
the biggest pain in the office.

And you're leaving me on my own?
-Francesco, you're his father.

Please, you can't leave me...

Do you like her then?

Who?
#Serena.

You see? Daddy's not
on his own any more.

He has someone who loves him.

What do you think of her?

Nothing special.
-Nothing special.

What the fuck are you doing?
-Nothing. -What are you doing?

Calm down, guys, he's with me.
-He's with you?

Yes. -Cool, Serena!
#Thanks... come away.

Bye.

"Cool, Serena"?
#Sister, he said "Cool, sister".

He's affectionate... in his own way.

Hi! -This is Pietro. -Nice
to meet you, I'm Sharon.

I'm Jennifer. -Are you two
an item? -Who? -You two.

No, he's a colleague.
-Too bad.

Jennifer, Sharon...
where are we, in New York?

They're cute. -Yes,
really cute. #Homework!

Bruno Serena might be cool,
but he's never set foot in here.

No, he did the survey,
he's a very professional person.

I don't reckon so, while you're here
working, he's living it up elsewhere.

Here.
-Thanks.

Why does everyone think
things are better abroad?

For the same reason we use
the expressions "spending review",

"meeting" and "jobs act"
instead of the ltalian words.

I don't even know
what "default" means.

Foreign things sound more cool.
-That's not true.

Damn it! Why won't anyone admit it?
#ltaly's a really beautiful country.

Really beautiful...

You can spend a few years abroad,
then you've had enough.

Name one fool who wants
to come back to ltaly.

Bruno Serena, for example.
-He's happy where he is.

Look, when you live abroad
you can also feel very...

Alone, unhappy... fragile.

Him, fragile? With his deltoids?
-Yes, him.

I'm sure he'd be much happier
sitting here right now

eating this cheese
and ham sandwich...

With you.
-With me?

Geez, you're getting me confused!
You get on my nerves!

What have I said?
-And what deltoids?

How do I know, I don't even know
where the deltoids are!

Do you mind if I sleep on the
right? #Fine, I prefer that side.

Are you sure?

What's up?
-This situation with my son.

Maybe I should prepare a speech.
-A speech?

You're not swearing in
at the White House.

You'll know when the time is right.

Think so?
-Yes.

You just have to create
a quiet moment.

Now move your flippers
out of the way and sleep.

You have to be wide awake
at the video conference tomorrow.

You're right,
or my face will look puffy.

The dilapidated state of the building...
-The written list by 4:00. -I know.

The local authorities, Mr Serena,
want a written list.

By 4:00.
-4:00.

What? -Nothing, I was
telling my secretary, Yoko...

"Don't you dare repeat that".

I told my secretary
to go and open the door.

"Go and open it!"

Forgive me while I go and get
an important document.

I'll be right back.

Darling! -Good morning!
-Mummy's darling! -Mummy?

I'm Serena's mother!
How handsome you are!

Even more handsome in the flesh!
-Hello, I'm Aunt Clementina.

I'm so fond of you!
-Aunt Clementina...

Quiet!

Hello?

Some delicious meat kebabs!
-And homemade aubergines.

Serena loves them.
#l'll call you back.

Come in, but keep quiet...

Look, all his things are hanging
out. -Come in here! -All of it!

Come on!

You're more handsome in real life.
-Hurry up. #l'll call you back.

Well?
-I'd wait for the summary table.

The new amendments.
-I know.

About the amendments...
-Yes.

Mr Serena, the important thing...
-The liaison.

Would be to have your assistant
liaising with my secretary. #Perfect!

So that we'll immediately be
operative for the local authorities.

Fully operative.
#At this point, for the amendments,

I'd ask you to look at
the graphics in table 3.

Because there, practically...

I can send it again if you want,
it's not a problem.

Remember the town hall on the 25th.
-I know, I remember!

The representatives from the town hall
are coming here on the 25th...

Perfect.
-To sign the contract.

We'll expect you here in
Rome. -In Rome? #Of course.

You can't ask me to do that.
-It's the last time!

Come home,
I can't take any more!

They're yelling in a language
I don't understand.

Salami!
-You have to come to this meeting.

Come here. -I'll call
you back. #Meat kebabs!

What are you up to, Giulia?
-Nothing.

Why isn't he coming
to sign for his project?

Because we've fallen out.
-Why's that?

Are you hiding something? Why
did you fall out? #Because...

Because there's someone else
in my life now...

What do you mean, someone else?

Bloody hell!

Aunt Clementina's aubergines
are wonderful.

What are they like, sweetie?
-Nothing special.

The doorbell.
#Go and open it. Go on!

They're delicious, Auntie!

Who is it? -A friend of
Francesco's, but he's not staying.

Let him in, there's plenty to eat.
#Hello, who are you?

Nice to meet you, I'm Nicola.
-Goodness, Nicola! #l'm Serena's mother.

You're so handsome!
You're all handsome here.

This is my sister Clementina.
-How handsome you are!

That's enough, Auntie!
#Enough!

You'll wear him out!
-Don't queen it up. #Rude!

Francesco!
#Come in. Move over for our guest.

Give Nicola a plate...

Have you already
eaten? -Yes. #Eat up!

Now for the ice-cream!
-And some cherry syrup.

Some for the little boy,
some for my Francesco...

Just Francesco.
-Some for Aunt Clementina. -Thank you.

For Mamma Grazia.
-Thank you, dear Nicola.

And some for dear Serena!
#Thank you.

Not so much.

And some for me.

Bloody hell!
#Don't you dare! Sit down and behave.

Down.
-Wicked. -Fool.

A little more ice-cream, Auntie.
-Have some more ice-cream. -Thanks.

You're welcome. -What's the
ice-cream like? -Nothing special.

Daddy buys you ice-cream and you
say it's "nothing special"? #Elton?

Can I have some more?
-Of course, Grandma's treasure!

It'll do you good.
-It can't be "nothing special" then.

What's this ice-cream like then?
-Good.

What? -Good. #Good?

What a lovely happy family.

"Happy families
are all alike.

Every unhappy family

is unhappy in its own way."

Tolstoy.
#The opening lines of "Anna Karenina".

Children are the best things
in the whole world.

I only had one,
but look what a marvel she is!

You're so beautiful!
-The phone! -Answer it!

Let go then.
-Go on.

There we are.
#Good boy.

This ice-cream is really amazing!

He's fallen asleep.

And so has Nicolino.

Have you told him?

Yes, can you hold the line, please?
#Michela, excuse me, I'm preparing

for the meeting
with the local authorities tomorrow.

Mr Ripamonti's on his way up.
-It's the councillor's secretary.

It's 10:00, not now.

Forgive me, I'll call you back.

If you don't mind me saying so,

Mr Ripamonti can walk through
the door on his own.

I've done this every morning for
30 years, don't tell me what to do.

Why do you do it? -It's my
job. #To make his coffee?

What do you know? Mr Ripamonti
and I have a special relationship.

Built on decades of respect.
-That's strange!

I find him rather ungrateful
when it comes to you.

I won't let you judge us.
-Everyone here knows it.

You do the work, he takes the credit.

Don't you do the same thing?
It's ourjob, my dear.

They're in the spotlight,
we work behind the scenes.

At least I don't have to make him
coffee every morning.

I don't do it because I have to,
I do it because I want to.

Good morning, crew!
-Good morning.

Michela, thank you for existing.

Denise, you're in great shape.
-Thanks.

Come on, Juventus! -Yeah! #Mr
Volponi, who did you upset last night?

I'm innocent, sir.
-Any news, Frangipane?

Everything's fine.
-Have a good day, everybody.

ltaly's best amateur chefs
fight it out for 100.000 Euros...

Dad? Can you give me a lift?

I'm going to a friend's house.
-Of course.

I can record this...

so I won't miss the finale.
Then I'm all yours.

Can I have some money?
I want to buy some chips.

Okay, perfect.

Pull them out with this
and put them there.

Well done.

Elton, Daddy wants
to tell you something.

Can I put some ketchup on them?

You can put whatever you want
on them.

Farewell, crew.
-Goodbye, sir.

Sir, don't forget
it's Tommaso's birthday.

Tommaso who?
-Your son.

Right, what did you get him?
-He'll love it, you'll see.

Michela, thank you for existing.
#Good evening.

Why didn't you answer my call?
-I couldn't.

Is he back,
is that why you couldn't?

Is it because we kissed,
or do you kiss everyone...

We'll discuss it later.
-Have you spoken to him?

About what?
-About us.

Listen, I'm not Bruno Serena's
mistress.

What then?
-I can't tell you.

The architect arrives tomorrow,
I have to plan the meeting.

You've just torn into Michela,
yet you're doing the same thing.

Are you spending the evening
doing your stupid boss's work?

You don't get it, it's important.

No, you don't get it,
it's important for him, not for you.

Oh God!

Go away!
You're getting on my nerves!

Oh really?

Daddy!
-Hello, darling.

Happy Birthday!
Let's see if I guessed right.

There you go. -Thanks, Dad!
#Nintendo, just what I wanted!

I'm so glad. Come on,
let's go. #Hello, darling.

Can't you give your dad a smile?
#Darn it...

The new technology of the casting.
-The cladding.

The cladding in Focchi facades

greatly improves the energy consumption
in the building and guarantees...

An... -Energetic... -Energy!
-Energy conversion efficiency...

Enough,
we've been at it for three hours.

You're as focussed as a hamster!
-Let's take a break.

Not another!
The meeting's in nine hours!

A lot can happen in nine hours!

What do you care?
It's my life that's at stake here!

Bad-tempered and melodramatic!

Here, have a drop of wine and relax.
Everything's under control.

Yeah, sure.

Do you trust me?

No? You're right not to.

I'm teasing.

Get off!

Jesus!

Francesco, Francesco...

Francesco, wake up!

Listen, do you think last night we...
#No!

Oh God, I don't think so.

Teeth? Make-up?
-Wonderful, beautiful.

Good luck.
-Thanks.

Hello.
-Hello.

Bruno Serena, this is Pietro.

Pleased to meet you.
#The pleasure's mine.

Is he... -No...
#Okay, now concentrate.

Mr Serena, at last!
Nice to meet you!

Come with me. We have to wrap up
a mere formality.

I am sure you and I will
see eye to eye immediately.

Of course!
-My assistant can come too. -Yes.

Good morning, councillors.

Economic reference.
-Everything's fine then.

All we need is the economic reference.
-For each item. -For each item.

Paragraph 4 of the terms of contract.

It's all in paragraph 4 of the "terms
of contrast". -Contrast? -Contract.

Say it properly. -Terms of contract.
-Energy conservation plan. -I know.

Michela, can you get
the energy plan of the building?

Right away. Volponi?
The energy plan of the building.

Engineer Volponi, Architect Serena!

Oh fuck!
-Fuck what?

Fuck, fuck. -Fuck,
fuck? #Volponi?

Thanks.

How about a champagne break?
-Yes!

You've been groping my arse
in front of everybody all this time!

Playing the hetero?
-So?

What was the point?
-With 200 applicants for 2 jobs,

do you think Ripamonti
would hire a queer?

What about you two?
-What about us?

With 50 candidates for a project,
would Ripamonti hire a woman?

Precisely, we all spew bullshit
to keep ourjobs here.

I need to keep mine.
-I need to sign for mine.

Are we all agreed then?

Good, you'll all get an up-to-date
schedule within 7 days, okay?

Goodbye.

Goodbye.
-Frangipane, see them out.

Give my regards to Councillor
Angeletti. #Of course.

Dear Serena, come here.

We need to discuss some priorities.
-Of course.

To cut down on costs,
we've decided on a few changes.

Who's "we"?

Miss Conti, I'm talking to
Architect Serena. #l'm sorry.

As I was saying
we have seen the possibility

of altering the intended use
of plot 7.

And that's where we'll build...
-The shopping centre.

No, plot 7 is...
#set aside for communal space.

The play area,
the old people's centre,

it's the heart of the project,
you can't do away with that!

Miss, we are all impressed by
your enthusiasm, but sit down now.

Come with me. Michela, get
the young lady a glass of water,

then she'll stop creating
all these problems for us.

You're the one who's the problem!

You see these two girls?

I didn't photoshop them,
they're real.

Their names are Sharon and Jennifer,
yes, they're dreadful names.

Jennifer has a huge arse,
but that's not her problem.

Her problem is she lives in
a tiny flat with four other people,

and she doesn't need a new shop
that sells mobiles or underwear,

she needs a decent place
to study in.

People are important, damn it!

Mrs Antonietta,
who you haven't even met,

can't find her own home because
the corridors are all the same.

This place is not a box to be filled,
people live here!

We're working for them, right?

Understand?
This project is for people!

It's wonderful to see how passionate
you are about yourjob.

I am sure Architect Serena
will reward you for it.

You're a bloody fool then!

What did you just say?
-She said: "You're a bloody fool".

It's my project.

I'm Serena Bruno.

Goodness!

Cheer up!

What a bitch!
I'm going to ruin her!

Not only will I fire her, I'll make
sure she never works for anyone else.

Forgery of public deeds is illegal.
#Michela, call Attorney Sinibaldi.

I'm not calling anyone.

If you report her,
I'll reveal the Campobasso papers.

And if you ask me to bring you
a coffee, I'll throw it at you.

What's your name? Who are you?
-My name's Serena, Serena Bruno.

How much crap have you told
me? -None. -Who's he then? -Hey!

Shut up! -Calm down. I'm sorry.
#l just did it for the job.

Everything? Us too?
-What do you mean?

Us too?
-Who is this dickhead?

Careful!
Cut that out, okay?

Don't you dare!
-Oh God, careful!

Stop it!

Oh God! Stop it!

Fine, just kill yourselves!

Darling, I just wanted to...

Do you wear glasses?

Why didn't you tell me before?
-I don't like them.

Wearing glasses is fine, it's
just the frames... #They're awful.

You know what?
On Saturday we'll go downtown

and buy you decent frames,
then you'll look real cool.

Dad?
#What did you want to tell me?

What did I want to tell you?

How long have you been
messing about with that guy?

No... it's not true.

It's no use denying it, I saw you.
-I assure you I haven't.

Tell the truth.
-I swear, you're the only guy for me.

But if I weren't a woman...

I'd be the man of your life.

Good morning, crew!

Denise, you're in good shape!
#Thank you!

Come on, Juventus!
-No!

Look here!

Come on, Naples!

Volponi!

Frangipane, any news?
-No news is good news, sir.

Thanks, Serena.
-Thanks. #Bye.

Thanks.

Bye, Serena.

Thanks.

Where did you find that?

It was a present from Boccino,
and this too.

Did you talk to Mrs Antonietta too?

What did she say?
-They've bought

30 litres of green paint and they're
painting that floor themselves.

They'll never make
the green kilometre, will they?

I don't know, I'm not setting foot
in there again.

Have you handed in your notice?

What will we do now?
#We...

Dad?

If Dad were hetero, you'd be
perfect for him. #Thanks, darling.

Thanks.

Well done. -What
for? #You told him.

Bye.

Hooray! Here's the
"cotturo"! -Applause! -Hooray!

Hooray for the "cotturo".
-Do you know what "cotturo" is?

It's a sheep cooked whole
in its own broth...

A heavy meal. -When did you get here?
-Just now. -When are you leaving?

To the only question
Aunt Clementina can formulate...

l think I'll give her
a different answer this time.

THE "GREEN KILOMETRE"
PROJECT EXISTS

IT WAS DESIGNED BY A WOMAN.
ARCHITECT GUENDALINA SALIMEI

THE PROJECT HAS BEEN APPROVED,
WORK SHOULD BEGIN IN 2015

HOPEFULLY