Original subtitles

Good morning, Miss Warren.

Dr.

Huxley is thinking.

Alice, I think this one must belong in the tail. Nonsense. You tried it in the

tail yesterday and it didn't fit.

Oh, yes, that's right. I did, didn't I?

Oh, David, it's a telegram for you from Utah.

It's from the expedition.

Oh, oh, the expedition?

Open it. I'll be right down. Gee whiz.

David, they found it. They found it, David.

Not near the cost of the chemical.

Thomas, wait here. We'll be here tomorrow.

Oh, just think of it, Professor.

The last bone we needed to complete the brontosaurus, the very last bone, the

intercostal clavicle, is arriving tomorrow after four years' hard work.

Congratulations, my boy. Oh, isn't it great? I can hardly believe it. Oh,

Alice. Stop it.

Really, David, there's a time and a place for everything. What will

Professor Latouche think? After all, my dear, you're getting married tomorrow.

Yes, I know we are. Oh, yes, that's right. We're getting married tomorrow.

Hey, isn't that odd? Two such important things happening on the same day. I

think the occasion calls for a celebration.

Oh, don't you worry, Professor. We're going to celebrate. We're going to go

away directly. We've been married. Going away? Why, what are you thinking of,

David? After receiving this telegram? Oh, we planned it. Why, as soon as we're

married, we're coming directly back here and you're going on with your work. Oh,

well, Alice, gee, we are. Now, once and for all, David, nothing must interfere

with your work. Oh. Our marriage must entail no domestic entanglements of any

kind. You mean, you mean... I mean of any kind, David.

Oh, well, Alice, I was sort of hoping... Well, you mean... You mean children and

all that sort of thing? Exactly.

This will be our child.

Yes,

David, I see our marriage purely as a dedication to your work. Well, gee whiz,

Alice, everybody has to have a honeymoon and... But we haven't time.

Speaking of time, you have an appointment this afternoon.

Have I?

What for? To play golf with Mr. Peabody.

Peabody? What Peabody? The Alexander Peabody who represents Mrs. Carlton

Random. Who may possibly donate a million dollars to the museum for the

completion of all this. Oh, sure, that Mr.

Peabody. A million dollars.

Say, that's pretty wide of Mr. Peabody, isn't it? Well, you haven't got it yet.

Let me remind you.

that a lot depends on the impression you make on him. Oh, sure. Oh, don't worry.

After I've received this, hey, I feel good for anything. I'll wow him. I'll

knock him for a loop. David, no slang. Remember who and what you are. Oh, yes,

that's right. Now, do go along. You mustn't keep him waiting. Well, well,

uh, goodbye, Alice. I mean, Professor.

Remember,

let Mr. Peabody win. Uh, uh, yes, Alice. Yes, I will.

Oh, dear. Excuse me.

I can't tell you, Mr. Peabody, how much this endowment would mean to the museum

and to me personally.

If you could just give me some assurance that... If you could just give me some

assurance that you'd consider us first before you donate that million to anyone

else, I'd appreciate it. Dr. Huxley, you seem to be under some misapprehension.

I haven't got a million dollars.

I merely represent the possible donor, Mrs. Carlton Random, whose legal advisor

I happen to be.

Oh, yeah, yeah. I forgot.

Oh, well, Mr.

Peabody, then I wonder...

If you could use your influence with Mrs. Random, that would be nice.

Dr. Huxley, when I play golf, I only talk golf.

And then only between shots.

Oh, yes, of course. I'm sorry. Couldn't we continue this discussion over a

whiskey and soda when we've finished our game?

Why, yes, we could.

Meantime, I believe you hooked your ball.

Is it? Yeah.

Oh, yes, that's right, I did.

Well, I'll be with you in a minute, Mr. Peabody. All right, all right.

Oh, look, look.

Hey,

that's my ball.

Just a minute.

Well, here's hoping.

I say just a minute. I beg your pardon.

Oh, dear.

You shouldn't do that, you know. But what shouldn't I do?

Talk while someone's shooting.

Well, anyway, I forgive you because I got a good shot. But you don't

understand. See, there it is, right next to the pin. But that has nothing to do

with it. Oh, are you playing through?

No, I've just driven off the first teal. I see you're a stranger here. You should

be over there. This is the 18th fairway, and I'm right on the green. If I sink

this pot, I'm going to beat my record.

I'll be with you in a minute.

What kind of boy are you playing? PGA.

Well, I'm playing a crow flight. I like a PGA better.

No, I'm just trying to prove to you that you're playing my ball. You see, a PGA

has two black dots and a crow flight has a circle. I'm not superstitious about

things like that. Oh, well, that doesn't have anything to do with it. Stop

talking for a minute, will you, please? Will you take out the pin?

Oh, my.

Oh, my. This is so silly. I never saw such... There,

you see, it's a circle.

Well, now, of course it is. Do you think it would roll if it was square?

No, I have reference to a mark on the ball. That proves it's a crow flight and

that's my ball. Well, what does it matter?

It's only a game anyway.

Well, my dear young lady, you don't seem to realize you've placed me in a very

embarrassing position.

Oh, really? I'm sorry. The most important corporation lawyer in New York

is waiting for me over on the first fairway. Then it's silly of you to be

fooling around on the 18th green.

You don't mind if I take this with me? No, not at all. Tell the caddy master to

put it in my bag when you're finished.

I'll be with you in a minute, Mr. Peabody.

Hey, mister, ain't that your car?

Hey, hey!

Oh.

I'll be with you in a minute, Mr.

Peabody.

This is my car.

Oh, good. Then would you mind moving it out of the way? No, no. This is my car.

Yes, I understand that. If you move it back about four feet, well, I'll be able

to get out. Well, I'm afraid you made a mistake. Maybe this is your car.

What did you say?

I said, if you move it back about four feet, I'll be able to get out.

I'm in a terrible hurry, and I can't budge here. Oh, you want me to move your

car? Would you mind terribly?

Well, yes, I will, but... Oh, that'd be awfully kind of you. Well, take it very

easy with that car. Yes, I'll go slowly.

What are you doing?

Well, I have to get into position.

Well, please be careful.

I will.

Now, you say when.

Yes, all right. Am I clear?

Yes, you're clear now.

Clear? Yes.

Oh, good.

Oh!

Now, look what you've done.

Oh, that's all right. I'm insured. Well, I don't care whether you're insured or

not.

Look, let me drive this car.

Oh, it's on. I did the no-track anyway. It doesn't matter.

Well, you don't understand. This is my car.

You mean this is your car? Of course.

Your golf ball, your car?

Is there anything in the world that doesn't belong to you?

Yes, thank heaven, you!

Now, don't lose your temper.

My dear young lady, I'm not losing my temper. I'm merely trying to play some

golf. Well, you choose the funniest places. This is the parking lot.

Will you get out of my car?

Will you get off my running board? This is my running board! All right, honey,

stay there. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh! Oh, Miss...

Good evening, sir. Excuse me, I'm looking for Mr. Peabody, Alexander

Peabody. I believe he's dining here.

Mr. Peabody has not arrived yet.

Oh, is that so? Well, I'll just wait.

Yes, sir.

Good evening, Lewis.

Good evening, sir. Right this way. Thank you.

May I check your hat, sir?

Excuse me? Check your hat.

Oh, no, I'd better... Well, maybe you... I dropped

my hat.

Well, I'd better hang on to it.

Now, watch very carefully. I'm watching.

I take an olive.

See? And I throw it in that glass. But there it is.

Now, I throw it in that glass. Oh, wait a minute. No, but I... Oh, now, go on,

go on, go on. Watch.

Now, I know what happens. That's wonderful.

You take three, don't you, Glenn? Only you cheat it. Well, you can see me take

three. Now, you throw it in the glass. Huh?

Now, take another.

You throw it in the glass. Good.

And then you do this.

Oh, I... Oh, I'm so sorry.

Oh, hello.

You're sitting on your hat.

I know it. Now, silly, get on for it. Sorry, I couldn't be more apologetic,

really. Well, I might have known you were here.

I had a feeling just as I hit the floor.

That was your hat.

Look at it.

Yes, it's too bad, isn't it? Well, Joe here was showing me a trick and the

olive got away.

First you drop an olive and then I sit on my hat. It all fits perfectly.

Oh, yes, but you can't do that trick without dropping some of the olives. It

takes practice.

What, to sit on my hat?

No, to drop an olive.

Now, if you're going to be angry with me, what can I do?

Go away.

No, I was here first.

Then I'll go away.

Won't you just take the olive dish?

No, no, it's all right. I'll sit here. You don't mind, do you? Not at all. This

is rather difficult.

I guess it is. Oh, goodness.

You know, your face is familiar. Haven't we met somewhere?

Not to my knowledge.

Well, I think you're wrong. My name's Susan Vance.

I'm Dr. Fritz Wimmer.

Oh, well, that's all right. You can sit down. I don't mind at all. Thank you.

You may have heard me lecture.

What do you lecture about?

I usually talk about nervous disorders.

I am a psychiatrist.

Oh, crazy people.

We dislike the use of that word.

All people who behave strangely are not insane.

Here's that, sir.

Oh, would you mind if I asked your professional opinion about something?

Not talk. Well, now, what would you say about a man who follows a girl around...

Follows her around. And then when she talks to him, he fights with her. Fights

with her? The young man you're fiancé?

Oh, no, I don't know him. I never even saw him before today.

No, he just follows me around and fights with me. Well, the love impulse in men

very frequently reveals itself in terms of conflict.

The love impulse?

Without my knowing anything about it, my rough guess would be that he has a

fixation on you. A fixation? No, no, no, wait a minute. I can't remember any more

than that. A fixation. That's right. The love impulse in man frequently reveals

itself in terms of...

Conflict. That's right. Oh, I'm eternally grateful to you. You're

absolutely wonderful.

Thank you a million times.

Do you know why you're following me?

You're a fixation.

Oh, I'm not following you. I've been sitting here. I haven't moved from this

spot. Now, please, you're following me.

Oh, don't be absurd. Who's always behind whom?

Now, look, my dear young lady, I haven't been behind anything but what they call

the eight ball. I haven't been all day.

You're angry, aren't you? Yes, I am.

The love impulse in man frequently reveals itself in terms of conflict.

Excuse me, the what impulse?

Love impulse.

Now, you see, the trouble with you is that you have a kind of... Now, now,

look, look. All I'm trying to do is find the gentleman whom, thanks to you, I

abandoned on the golf course today. That's all I'm trying to do here. Now,

please, go. Say, this isn't... Well, what do you suppose I... Here, hold this

a minute, will you? Please, I'll be right back. Yes.

Missed.

I'm sorry I was so long. That's quite all right, my dear. I had a very

entertaining conversation with a young lady who does tricks with olives when

she gets it right.

Fritz, where's my purse?

Your purse, dear? I thought you had it with you.

No, I left it right here on the table.

Oh, my dear, my diamond pin was in it.

Oh, but when I look... Diamond pin!

Oh, he's lost the diamond pin. We're going to find it. All right, don't worry

about it. Excuse me, I... Well, there it is.

Thank you very much. Well, thank you, sir. It's very kind of you.

This is my purse and my diamond pin in this. All right, I'm really excited.

Just take the purse.

Give me that. Will you please hand it over? Please do something about it. Will

you please keep out of it, darling? Go ahead and do something about it.

I did the trick.

I did it nice.

Uh-oh.

Give it to me. It's madness for you to stand there and say it's not my wife.

I'm afraid you've made a slight blunder. You see, this below... Oh, there is the

young lady. Now, look, isn't this your purse? No, this is my purse. Why, there

you are, just hand it over to me.

Now, just a minute. Didn't you give me this purse to hold? Yes, that's right, I

did. I did. I gave him the purse to hold. You see, there's been a mistake.

I lost my purse, and I must have picked up your wife's purse by mistake.

And I wanted him to stay here, so I gave him your wife's purse to hold while I

went to find my purse, and I was coming right back.

Now, that's all perfectly clear, isn't it? No, it isn't. You see, if you're

going to give me an explanation... No, no, no. And my dear sir, it never will

be clear as long as she's explaining it. Now, please let me... Now, just a

minute. Oh, no, no, no. He's innocent. He's innocent. Now, you have your wife's

purse. I have my purse. And Louis here is going to explain it all to you and

everything's going to be all right. All right.

Now, please listen to me. You certainly can't think that I did that

intentionally. Well, if I could think, I'd have run when I saw you.

No, but if you'd only wait while I explain. I just gave you my purse.

Oh, you've torn your coat.

Now, I didn't do it on purpose. Not right. That's not right. It's not my

fault. I didn't mean to do it. I just did it. But I didn't mean to do it. I

just caught hold of your coat. Look, will you do something for me?

A needle?

No, it's simpler than that.

Let's play a game.

Oh, what?

Well, watch. I'll put my hand over my eyes, and then you go away.

See? Then I'll count to ten, and when I take my hand down, you will be gone.

Well, I like that. I was only trying to be nice.

Thank you.

Oh!

Oh, just a minute!

Oh, no, you can't talk to me that way and then crawl out of it. When I'm mad,

I am mad.

Something horrible has happened. Well, don't tell me about it. Just get out of

it as best you can. And please stop following me around, fixation or no

fixation. I've had about enough. Please stop talking so that I can tell you...

Will you please stop crowding me?

No, no, no, no. Look, I'm just trying to tell you that you've talked... Oh, no, I

didn't. Why, if you hadn't been in such a hurry and had waited for my

explanation... Not my coat. Your coat would still be perfectly all right.

What is the matter with you? Well, you see, I...

Do you realize that you're making a perfect fool of yourself? Now, look

here. You can't tell me that I tore your coat. There's such a thing as being...

Will you please stop doing that with your hat? Well, just stand there, will

you?

And the world is going on here. Oh, no, please don't move. Oh, I've had about

enough of this. Now, look, listen to me. Let's get out of here. Just start

walking. Believe me. So now you want to walk. Well, I'm quite sure that I don't

want to walk with you. And I hope you realize that you've made a perfect

spectacle of yourself.

Have you finished?

Oh, yes, yes, yes.

Don't just stand there. Do something. Do something.

Oh, my goodness.

Well, get behind me. I am behind you. Well, get closer. I can't get any

closer. Now, are you ready? I'll be calm. That foot first. All right.

Keep it going straight out the door.

Yes, but I have to meet somebody here. Oh, there he is. Don't you dare leave

me. I'll be with you in a minute, mister.

I'll be with you in a minute, sir. I'll see you in a minute, sir. I'll see you

in a minute.

So you see, Miss Vance, it's very important that I meet this man in order

to explain to him what happened.

Although even if I saw him, I wouldn't know what to say.

Well, it's perfectly simple. Just tell him that you met someone that you knew

and were detained.

I can picture myself explaining our exit from the Ritz Plaza Hotel to Mr.

Peabody. But it's not Boopy that you're trying to see. No, no, his name's

Peabody. Alexander Peabody, but that's Boopy and I know him well. I was going

to have supper with him tonight. He'll do anything I ask him to. I can wrap him

around my little finger. Here.

Now you put on your coat and we'll go over to the Ritz and catch him before

he's finished dinner. I'd better go there alone. And if we miss him there,

no, you can't go alone. If we miss him there, we'll go out to Riverdale. I

couldn't go to Riverdale. I couldn't spend that much time. Riverdale's only

half an hour away. I have my car right outside. Yes, but I have to go to

Carnegie Hall to meet Miss Swallow.

Miss Swallow?

Yes, I'm engaged to Miss Swallow.

Engaged to be married?

That's right.

Oh, that's nice.

Then she won't mind waiting, will she?

Oh, well, I wouldn't like to... I mean, if I were against you, I wouldn't mind

waiting at all. I'd wait forever. Yes, but it wouldn't be right to leave...

Well,

I finally got you here, didn't I? Oh, yes.

Susan. Huh?

Susan, do they build all the houses in Riverdale alike?

No, I don't think so. Why?

Oh, well, because if they don't, we've passed this one six times in the last

hour.

Oh, but David, it was such a lovely night for a drive.

Come on. Oh, dear.

Well, there aren't any lights in the windows. Mr. Peabody must have gone to

bed. Oh, no, he couldn't have gone to bed this soon. It's too early.

Oh, I don't know. If they expected a visit from you, they could, with the

coppers over their heads.

Now, David, if you don't stop nagging, I won't help you arrange matters with

Boopy. Well, somehow I have a feeling it might be better if you didn't. Why?

Well, I don't think we ought to do this, Susan. Gee, if we wake him up in the

middle of the night, he'll be irritable.

Well, I don't think it's going to work anyway, but I know where Boopy sleeps.

Oh, no.

But, Susan, you can't climb in a man's bedroom window.

I know. It's on the second floor.

Boopy! Hey!

Boopy! Oh, Susan, wait, please. It's too late now, Susan. You can't wake him up.

Oh, can't I?

What are you doing?

Pebbles. Pebbles? What for?

Well, I've heard that if you throw pebbles up against the window, the

people think it's hail, and then they come and close the window.

Oh!

Oh, I know we ought to go now, but somehow I can't move.

Guess they weren't big enough.

What?

Oh, hi.

Just a minute. Oh!

Jeepers, let's get out of here.

Now,

don't worry, David. Everything's going to be all right. And tomorrow, when

Boopy's calmed down, we'll go and see him together.

Now, just a moment, Susan. Don't think that I don't appreciate all you've done,

but... Oh, it's nothing, David, really. Just a moment. But there are limits to

what a man can bear.

And besides that, tomorrow afternoon I'm going to get married.

What for?

Well, because... Well, anyway, I'm going to get married, Susan, and don't

interrupt. No.

Now, my future wife has always regarded me as a man of some dignity.

Privately, I'm convinced that I have some dignity.

Now, it isn't that I don't like you, Susan, because, after all, in moments of

quiet, I'm strangely drawn toward you, but, well, there haven't been any quiet

moments. Our relationship has been a series of misadventures from beginning

to end. So, if you don't mind, I'll see Mr. Peabody alone and unarmed.

Without me? Yes, without you, and definitely without you.

Now, Susan, I'm going to say goodnight.

And I hope that I never set eyes on you again.

Good night.

Yes, I did see Mr. Peabody, but I didn't see him.

Well, that is, I didn't see him really.

Yes,

I spoke to him twice, but I didn't talk to him.

But David, I don't understand.

Did you see him or didn't you?

Well... No, I don't know.

Well, how do I know? Well, because... Because... Well, there's someone at the

door. You see, there's some things that are very hard to explain, Alice, and as

soon as I... Yes, uh... Oh, now, Alice.

Before we're married this afternoon, there's one thing we must have clear.

I don't want any woman interfering with my affairs.

It's fatal.

That's the stuff, buddy.

What do you want?

Dr. Huxley?

Yes. Sign here.

Oh, just a minute, Alice.

I have to sign something.

Oh! Oh, Alice!

Alice, it's arrived!

The intercostal clavicle. Yes, isn't that wonderful?

Oh, isn't that a marvelous wedding present?

Thank you.

You see, I'm going to be married this afternoon. Don't let it throw you,

buddy.

Yes, Alice.

Yes, isn't that great?

Oh, Alice, I'm so excited.

Yes, well, I'll tell you what to do. You go on down to the museum, and I'll meet

you down there right away.

Yes, dear. Goodbye.

Hello?

Oh, it's you.

Well, well, I can't hear you very well. Come closer to the telephone.

I said, good morning, David, and I said, do you want a leopard?

A leopard? No, why should I want a leopard?

Well, for that matter, why should I? But I've got one.

Susan, where would you get a leopard?

Well, I wouldn't get a leopard, David. My brother Mark got him. He's hunting in

Brazil, and I guess he caught him.

Oh, of course. It's a stuffed leopard.

Of course. Now, why should my brother Mark be hunting stuffed leopards in

Brazil when he used stuffed leopard, when he can find them right here in New

York?

Well, David, it's lucky I met you yesterday because you're the only

zoologist I know.

Well, of course I know what a zoologist is. Get out of here. No, no, not you,

David. Oh, baby, get back into that bathroom and stay there. You're making a

nuisance of yourself.

No, not you, David. No, I want you to come right over.

Oh, David, don't be irrelevant.

The point is, I have a leopard. The question is, what am I going to do with

it? Well, Susan, I regret to say the leopard is your problem.

You mean you refuse to help me?

But, David, you can't do that. You can't leave me alone with a leopard.

Come and get you and not... Susan!

What happened?

Is it the leopard?

You lied to me. No, well, I did. Tell me a ridiculous story about a leopard.

Nobody wants a ridiculous story. I have a leopard. Well, where is the leopard?

Right in there.

I don't believe you, Susan. But you have to believe me. I'm the victim of your

unbridled imagination once more.

That'll teach you to go around saying things about people.

Susan, you've got to get out of this apartment.

But David, I can't. I have a lease.

Oh, it's just a man.

I've got to get this thing out of here. Don't worry about him. He's really all

right. What are you going to do? I'm going to call the zoo. Oh, no, you can't

do that, David. Oh, that's the meanest thing I ever heard. He's a pet. He'd be

miserable in a zoo. Listen, from my brother Mark from Brazil. Dear Susan,

I'm sending you baby.

That's baby.

A leopard I picked up. Got him with your life. He's three years old, gentle as a

kitten, and he likes dogs.

I don't know whether Mark means that he eats dogs or is fond of them. Mark's so

vague at times. He also likes music, particularly that song, I Can't Give You

Anything But Love. Oh, that's absurd.

No, it isn't, David. Really, listen.

This is probably the silliest thing that ever happened to me.

I know it's silly, but it's true. He absolutely adores the tune.

What's the difference whether it adores it or not? It's funny that he should

like such an old tune, isn't it? But I imagine that down in Brazil they

probably... Listen. Oh, stop it, Susan. Oh, David, let me show him. Oh, don't do

that, Susan. Don't go near the door. Oh, dear, dear, dear.

Watch, David. You'll see he'll go right toward the music.

Look at that.

Isn't this remarkable?

It loves it.

Susan, if we put the Victrola in the bathroom, will it go back in?

Oh, yes, but the music sounds better out here, and besides, he likes it.

Oh, here it comes.

Oh, now, go away. Go. Oh, please, go away.

Oh, my. Go away.

I'm going to get out of here. Oh, oh, Susan, I don't like leopards.

Just think of him as being a house cat, David. Well, I don't like cats either.

Stand still, David. Don't be nervous.

Uh-oh, make him stand still. Don't be silly, David. You can't make a leopard

stand still.

Susan, do something. Turn off that patroller.

I don't think it's the music, David. I think it's you.

David, I think you've found a real friend. Look, isn't it affectionate?

Just like a little baby kitten.

I never saw anything take such a liking to anyone in my life. It would follow

you anywhere.

We shan't have any trouble taking you to Connecticut.

My farm in Westlake, Connecticut.

Well, I'm not going to Westlake, Connecticut.

Susan, I will not be involved in any more of your harebrained schemes. But

it's not a harebrained scheme. Imagine Aunt Elizabeth coming to this apartment

running smack into a leopard. That would be an end of my million dollars.

If you hadn't thought I was going to give you a million dollars if she liked

you and you knew she wouldn't like you, if she found a leopard in your

apartment, what would you do?

I don't know. Oh, David, you have to help me. Oh, there are only two things

in the world I have to do. Finish my brother's charge and get married at 3 o

'clock.

Go on, quitter.

Well, it's no good calling me names, Susan, because I won't argue with you

anymore. I don't want anything to do with a leopard.

Go on, baby, down the stairs.

Morning. Good morning, Professor.

Good morning.

You better change your mind about coming to Connecticut.

Susan, we settled that question once and for all.

But what about my leopard?

That's your problem.

It's not all my problem.

Susan, will you please go away?

All right, David.

Since he likes you so much, I've decided to give him to you.

I won't take him.

You've got him.

Oh! Susan, don't go away. I've got the leopard.

Susan!

Oh, dear, look at her.

No, David, all I was doing was driving along. That's all I was doing.

You were standing on the sidewalk, yelling and looking very silly. Now, you

know very well you tricked me into this trip.

Look, look.

Eating your car.

Oh, look at the road.

Oh, dear. I have a feeling something horrible is going to happen.

Oh, no, David. Everything's going to be all right.

I don't care anymore.

Oh.

Hello. Oh, what's the matter? You get lonely?

Susan, if you know any shortcuts, please take them.

We're going to be there in no time now, David, really.

Because all I want to do is deliver this leopard, take the first train back to

town, and forget the last 24 hours ever happened.

Oh, now what's wrong with the last 24 hours? I've had a wonderful time.

Susan, I don't know. You look at everything upside down. I've never known

anyone quite like you. You've just had a bad day, that's all.

Oh, well, that's a masterpiece of understatement. Now, look.

Well, I can't discuss anything with you with baby breathing down the back of my

neck. Hey.

That wagon was on the side of the road, Susan. It certainly was not. It was

straight ahead of me, and that's why I bumped into it. What time is it?

Well, David, we'll be there in no time. We just have to stop at Westlake to get

some meat for baby.

Why, he's already had an assortment of ducks and chickens, not to mention a

couple of swans.

All feathers.

Yeah, well, very expensive feathers.

I don't see how any pair of swans could cost $150.

That was a jiff. Well, if you'd run, as I told you to, we shouldn't have had to

pay for them.

Susan. When a man is wrestling a leopard in the middle of a pond, he's in no

position to run.

There it is, David.

Please hurry up.

Oh, Susan.

Why, of all places, when you have a leopard in the car, did you have to stop

in a town where there's a circus?

But, David, I didn't stop because there's a circus, but baby's going to be

hungry and we'll have to feed him. Now, please hurry, David. If baby wakes up,

we'll be in real trouble.

Well, I don't suppose it makes any difference to you, but you're parked in

front of a fire plug. Mm-hmm. I know it. Don't worry about that, David. I'll come

and take care of everything. All right. You go ahead.

Fifty-one dollars. Thank you. Yes, sir. What can I do for you? I want 30 pounds

of sirloin steak, please.

Did you say 30 pounds?

Yes, that's right. 30 pounds.

How will you have it cut?

Oh, just in one piece.

Are you going to roast it or broil it?

Neither. It's going to be eaten raw.

Yeah.

Hey,

lady. Huh?

That's a fire plug.

I know it.

It's against the law to park alongside a fireplug. I know it.

Come here.

Who, me? Why?

I'm Constable Slocum.

Oh, is that so?

How do you do? I'm Susan Vance. How do you do?

Now, listen, I don't care who you are. I just want to let you know that you can't

park alongside of a fireplug. Yes, well, you see, I was just watching the parade.

Oh, you were.

I suppose you get free seats to the circus.

Well, Elmer and I usually get a... Now, listen, young lady, that has nothing to

do with it. I'm just going to give you a ticket.

Oh, well, thank you very much, Constable. I'd love to go to the circus,

but you better keep your tickets because I'm busy tonight.

Yeah, well, it ain't that kind of a ticket.

Oh, jeepers. Young lady, it might interest you to know that you're under

arrest. Oh, well, I mean, why?

For parking alongside of a fireplug.

Oh, but I'm not parked next to a fireplug. You ain't? Well, what do you

call that?

Oh, well, you mean that you think that this is my car.

Well, ain't it?

No, that's my car.

Well, why didn't you say so in the first place? Well, you didn't ask me.

Oh.

Oh.

Say. Do you grind this up before you eat it? Oh, this isn't for me. It's for

baby. All right.

Hurry up, baby. Get in. But, but, but. Jump off.

But that isn't your car.

No, but it's my weapon.

Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. That's my car. Come back here. What are

you yelling about? They stole my car. Stole your car? Last night they tried to

steal my wife's purse. What?

Now don't stand there. Do something. Get after them. Catch them. Well, bless me.

Hey, bring back that car.

I'm glad we finally got here.

Isn't it wonderful?

We can put him in that box. Wait a minute. Don't open the door until you

close the door.

I think that is a good idea.

We'll get out of here.

We won't get out of here.

I'll open this one.

Come on, baby.

Go on.

Everything is quite all right. No, everything is not all right.

Everything is not all right, Susan. It may be all right for you, but now I've

got to get back to New York. Oh, David, what a one you are. No sooner do you get

one thing settled than you start worrying about something else. Well, my

heavens, Susan, one of us should worry, because on top of all this happened,

we've stolen the car. Oh, well, that's all right. I'll send it back. I don't

like it anyway. I suppose you'd like me to leave it with the constable on my way

back to New York. No, that wouldn't be safe. You might be arrested, besides,

it's a hot car.

Yes, I know. You're going to fire the numbers off the engine. No, that would

be dishonest. I'll have the gardener take it back after it starts.

Stop it, Susan. Stop it. You're shedding.

Now, where is the telephone?

Out that door. Well, that's all I want to know. Thank you. No, but, David, what

I want to suggest is... Now, Susan, I don't want any more suggestions from

you. My fiancée is waiting for me in New York. In order to get married, I have to

get to New York.

Oh, you're... David, I want you to be married. I think you should be married.

I think every man should be married. But I don't think that any self-respecting

girl will marry you. Where is the telephone?

In there. But, David, look at yourself. What's the matter with me?

Oh, my, I am dirty, aren't I? There, you see, now what I want to suggest is that

you come into the... The only way you'll ever get me to follow another of your

suggestions is to hold a bright object in front of my eyes and twirl it. Yes, I

understand that. I simply wanted to suggest... I don't want any suggestions.

All I want to do just now is to clean up. Where is there a shower, please?

That's what I was going to suggest, a shower.

Well, why send them into town? I can do them here. Now, don't argue with me,

Hannah. Into town and have them cleaned and pressed. It'll take a lot longer,

Susan. Oh, there's no hurry, Hannah. No hurry at all.

of a brontosaurus.

Oh, really?

Oh, it's just an old bone.

Yes, Susan, it's just an old bone. Put it down gently and go away.

All right, David.

Is there anything else I can do for you?

Oh, yes. Hand me my clothes, will you?

Oh, David, they aren't here. They're being pressed.

What? Well,

I mean, the gardener's taken them into town.

Oh, well, stop him. I can't wait. I must leave here immediately.

David, you can't leave without your clothes. Well, I know that.

Where are you going? I'm going to take a shower.

Oh, Susan, Susan, don't leave me here like this.

Don't be impatient, David.

We're talking over after I've finished.

Everything's going to be all right.

Everything's going to be all right. Oh, certainly everything's going to be all

right. Everything's going to be... Oh, I'm losing my mind, that's all.

Roaming around Connecticut without any clothes on.

I'll go crazy.

How can all these things happen to just one person? Susan?

Susan? Susan?

Susan, where are you?

Susan, when you come out of there and help me find some clothes, I must not

come in and get you. Oh, David, you wouldn't. Oh, yes, I would.

Oh, maybe I wouldn't.

Susan, where's the gardener's room?

Why? Because he must have some clothes. Where's his room?

I can't hear you.

You can hear what you want to hear.

No, really, I can't. What did you say?

I just said... Oh, never mind. I'll find a place myself.

The gardener must have clothes. Clothes are clothes.

How does he know?

Well, he couldn't have taken all his clothes with him.

Oh, the conceited, spoiled little scatterbrains.

My goodness, the man who gets... The man who gets you is going to have a lifetime

of misery.

Everything's going to be all right. Yes, everything's going to be... What do you

want? Well, who are you?

Who are you?

Well, who are you?

What do you want? Well, who are you?

I don't know. I'm not quite myself today.

Well, you look perfectly idiotic in those clothes.

These aren't my clothes.

Well, where are your clothes?

I've lost my clothes. Well, why are you wearing these clothes?

Because I just went gay all of a sudden.

Oh, excuse me, I'm sorry. Now, see here, young man, stop this nonsense.

What are you doing?

I'm sitting in the middle of 42nd Street waiting for a bus.

Where'd you get him? His friend Mark's. What's he doing here?

Susan brought me. I don't doubt it, but why?

You see, I had a letter from Mark from the hill. He said that David was an old,

old friend of his, that he'd been working very, very hard in town.

And that he was on the point of having a nervous breakdown.

I'm a nut from Brazil. Well, he's very excitable. He must be allowed to do

whatever he wants to do. Wear his clothes.

Well, Susan took them.

What's he doing in that face?

Oh, Mark says he should be allowed to wear an egg-shaped. He wants to wear an

egg-shaped because there's no telling, Mark says, what'll happen if he doesn't

have his own work. Does he want to wear those clothes?

No, I don't want to wear this thing. I just want to get married.

Susan, I forbid it.

I absolutely put my foot down. The idea.

Oh, but now I think you'd only listen to me for a minute while you were able to

understand this.

Quiet!

Quiet!

Perhaps you can help

me. Perhaps you can help me find some clothes.

Yes, yes. Must be some of Mark's things around.

Are there?

Well... Oh, yes, there are some in Mr. Mark's room, sir. Yes, sir. Which is Mr.

Mark's room?

Well, it's the end, sir.

Yes, sir. Thank you.

Thank you.

Go away. Go away.

Go away.

Oh, my God.

Go away. Go away.

Oh, go away.

He loves me, he loves me, now he loves me, now he loves me, now he loves me.

David!

Where'd he go?

Went to get some clothes.

If he gets some clothes, he'll go away. He's the only man I've ever loved.

David! Oh, what am I gonna do?

Oh, get away from me.

I don't care what you do.

Where are you?

Here I am. What do you want?

Oh, Jesus.

Oh, go on and laugh. I know it looks ridiculous, but I'm past caring. Oh, no,

no, I don't mean to. What are you going to do?

What I'll be trying to do, get back to New York. But, David, you can't go to

New York dressed that way. You might be... They're all I could find in closer

clothes, and I'm going. I'm going back to New York if only to repair the damage

that's been done since I've known you.

I've done a misswallow to the museum, to Mr Peabody and everybody else. Mr

Peabody? But, David, the one way for you to get to Mr Peabody is through Aunt

Elizabeth. Please listen to me for one second. Now, he'll do anything that she

tells him to, even like you. He's Aunt Elizabeth's lawyer.

He's her lawyer, Mr Peabody.

What's your aunt's name? Elizabeth.

Well, she has another name. Yes, of course she does. Oh, never mind, never

mind. Don't tell me. Well, why not? It's random, Mrs Carlton, random. Yes, I

know, I know. I knew that was...

What's the matter?

Oh, my goodness. Out of seven million people, why did I have to run into you

yesterday?

Well, what have I done?

Susan, Mrs. Random is going to give away a million dollars.

I know.

I wanted it for the museum.

Oh, David. Well, I'm afraid that you've made a rather unfavorable impression on

Aunt Elizabeth.

Yeah, I quite realize that.

Susan.

Susan, listen to me. What?

Now, a lot of things have happened, but we'll forget all about them because this

is serious.

What, David?

Well, can you concentrate for just a moment?

Mm-hmm.

There's only one thing to be done, and this is important to me and to my work.

Oh.

What? You're so good-looking without your glasses.

Susan, listen to me and try and remember.

What? Well, you see, I've made a horrible mess of things, and your aunt

must never find out who I am.

You do understand all that, don't you, Susan? Yes, David.

You can tell her that I'm a friend of Mark's, that I have bats in the belfry,

but don't ever tell her my name is David Huxley. Now, can you remember all that,

Susan? Yes, David. You're sure?

Yes, David.

But you are good-looking without your glasses.

Oh, never mind, Susan. Never mind. What'd I say?

What'd I say?

What'd I do?

What did I say?

What did I say?

What did I do, David?

Susan, I just asked you to remember what you said. I know, David, and I swear I'm

going to remember it. Where is it? I know exactly what you told me to say.

Where is it?

Where's what? My intercostal clavicle.

Your what?

My bone. It's rare. It's precious. What did you do with it?

The bone.

Susan, you had it. Give it to me. No, I haven't got it. I really haven't got it.

Well, did you carry it somewhere? No, David, what would I be doing carrying a

bone around?

Well, I wouldn't dare give a reason for anything you do.

Well, I guess you have to find another one.

It took three expeditions in five years to find that one.

Well, David, now that they know where to find them, couldn't you send them back

to get another one?

Susan, look, you had it. You took it out of the box. Now, where did you put it? I

put it back in the box.

Well, was there somebody else in the room? No, David, there was nobody else

in the room, but... David, George.

Who's George? The dog.

You know, don't you see?

Dog, bone, dog, bone.

Oh!

George! George!

George! George!

George! George! George!

Oh, stop it, Susan, you sound like an echo.

George! Nice, George.

George! Nice, George.

Nice, George!

George!

Did you see him? See who?

George. Are those the only clothes you could find?

Susan, Susan, come back here. Come back here this minute. What are you doing?

Honey, but George. Why? David wants him. David loves him. David thinks he's such

a nice dog.

George is a perfect little fiend and you know it. But David doesn't. Come here.

Susan.

Oh. Oh.

Oh.

David.

George.

He's definitely not in the house. That's settled.

Don't do that, David. If he knows you want him, you'll hide.

Well, Susan, where is he apt to go?

George is apt to go anywhere.

Oh, I don't mean that. Where does he hide things?

Oh, now, David, how can I tell you? Well, you ought to know. Oh, there he

is! George! George!

Oh, my goodness, look at his nose. He's been digging. He's buried it. David,

there are 26 acres in this garden. Well, that's awful.

Now, George!

Where did you hide that bone? No, no, David, not that way. Now. Now, George,

we're not angry, no.

David and Susan need that bone. It's a nasty old bone. It's hundreds of years

old. That's David's bone.

Now,

Susan will get you a nice fresh bone if you'll just show us where it is. Oh,

look at the nasty little curve.

Now, George, don't be stubborn.

Susan loves you.

Now, where'd you put it? Don't you remember?

Where'd you dig? He's not paying a bit of attention. George!

Everything's going to be all right, David. This must be the spot.

He's going to start digging in a minute. I can tell. There he goes.

That's right, George.

That's right.

Nice, George. You see, it's all very simple if you keep your head. I do hope

he doesn't hurt that bone. Isn't he a nice little dog? Isn't he a strong

little man, David?

Oh, he's got something. He's got something.

Come on, David. We'll help him.

Dig. I'm digging.

Oh, I feel something.

I feel something. Oh, I hope it didn't hurt.

Oh, look, David, a boot.

A boot. Don't hit George, David.

I wasn't going to hit George.

Now, George, that was fine, but now you've got to concentrate again. David

has to find his bone.

No, not in there.

Isn't this fun, David? Just like a game.

Oh, yes.

Now, George, if you get tired of digging, you just tell David and Susan

where you hit it, and they'll dig.

Susan, do you think George is really trying?

Well, David, almost every place he's taken us, we've found something.

There's nothing here. Oh, look, David, another boot.

Oh, another boot. That makes three pairs.

Now, come on, George, quit stalling. Where is it? Oh, don't be discouraged,

David. Now, George, concentrate.

Bones, not boots.

Oh, there you go. Oh, you see, he's got... I'm getting tired of all this

digging. Yes, what we need is a plough.

Susan!

Susan!

Oh, Jesus, it's Aunt Elizabeth. Follow him, David. Don't let him get away.

What on earth are you doing?

What are all these?

Those? Oh, they're holes.

Well, holes, of course. I can see they're holes. How'd they get here?

Well, David and George and I were digging.

Who is this David?

He's a friend of Mark's. Is that all you know about him? No, I know that I'm

going to marry him. He doesn't know it, but I am. Now, see here, if you're

planning to marry him on my money, you're very much mistaken. I don't want

another loon-tick in the family. I've got loon-ticks enough already.

When are you going to marry him? What's his name?

It's, um, Bone.

Bones? What a ridiculous name. One bone. Well, one bone or two bones, it's a

ridiculous name.

What does he do?

He hunts.

Hunts? Hunts what?

Well, animals, I should think. Big game hunting, huh? Yes, very big.

You call that big game hunting?

Look at that.

Well, auntie, he's just playing with George. Well, he's not going to play

with George another minute. Tell him to get in his tapas, stay sharp, and not to

keep his weight.

George, come here this minute.

George!

Come along, George.

Oh, David.

Yes, Alice, that's where I am in Connecticut, but I can't get in because

I've been unavoidably detained.

David, listen.

Susan, I can't hear you. I'm talking. Go away. I'll be with you as soon as I'm

finished.

Yes, I know that... Susan, will you please get off the phone?

No, but David, you don't realize how important this is. It's about the

leopard. He's making the most terrific breakfast out there. He's hungry. We've

got to feed him. Well, I can't help that.

What, Alice dear?

No, it's somebody on the line. Keep quiet, Susan.

David, you've got to help, but this can't wait.

There are eight million people in this house, and if they hear him, why,

they'll think that something terrible has happened.

Oh, now, Susan, get off the line, please. Hello, Alice.

Hello. What?

Oh, well, I don't know what time it is.

When you hear the tone, the time will be 7.37 and one quarter.

Oh, Susan, please, please.

Alice, you see, I can't hear you. I... When you hear the tone, the time will be

7.40.

When you hear the tone, the time will be 7.40 and one half.

When you hear the tone, the time will be 7.41.

Pardon me, the time is 8.10.

When you hear the tone, the time will be 7.51. No, the time... My watch shows 8

.10 and a quarter.

Who am I? I'm 8.10.

I'm Major Horace Applegate. I... I...

What do you want?

Mrs. Randham invited me for dinner. Would you please find out if she still

wants me?

She's hung up.

Oh, well, so am I.

Why, Horace, what are you doing? Are you coming in or going out?

Well, I... She's coming in to dinner. This is Major Applegate. How do you do?

I'm Susan Brown. Oh, how do you do, Miss Susan?

Hello, Elizabeth.

You know, you're much too big to swing on gates. Yes, I found that out.

Susan, come back here. Where are you going? Oh, I'm just going out. I've had

enough of this. You should be watching Jaws, not playing around with telephone.

Oh, excuse me. George is fast asleep in my room.

Now, come here, young man. And don't be afraid.

Come here.

Oh, you look much better in those clothes, young man. Thank you. I want

you to meet Mr. Bone.

Well, how do you do, Mr. Bone?

Oh, you're Mr.

Bone. This is Major Applegate. Yes, I'm Major Applegate. At least I'm pretty

sure I am. That is, I was this morning.

There must be some mistake.

Oh, there isn't any mistake.

I've known Major Applegate for 20 years, haven't I, Horace? Well, 22 to be exact,

I think, Elizabeth. It was long about... Oh, excuse me. How do you do, Mr.

Applegate? Well, how do you do again? Thank you. Yes, now Mr. Bowen will go

for a nice long walk. Well, I'd like just to explain to you... You don't need

to explain anything. All right, I understand.

I understand. All right. Yes, yes. Goodbye, Major Applegate. Mr. Bow...

Mr... Strange young man, isn't he? Is he suffering from something?

He's had a nervous breakdown.

Had or has?

Had. Oh. And it's left him sort of, you know. Oh, my, my, my. What a pity. And

so young, too. The trouble is, my niece Susan seems to be showing the same

tendency. Is that so?

You're all right, though. Well, I hope so. Yeah, of course. Here, have a drink.

Thank you. Thank you.

Now, conversation at the dinner table may be a trifle difficult on account of

this young man.

So I want you to sort of draw him out.

Draw him out? I don't know what you mean. Yes. Talk to him about something

he understands.

Big game hunting, for instance.

You know, he's a big game hunter like yourself.

You don't say. Well, then, Elizabeth, you've come to the right man.

There he's been.

Now I'm sure he's going to keep quiet there, then.

Well, come on, let's go into dinner.

What's the matter? Why are you just sitting there?

Well... Well, I'm just trying to figure out how I ever got mixed up in all this.

Mr. Bone, isn't that amazing? Well, David, you told me not to tell Aunt

Elizabeth what your real name was. Look, look, I didn't tell you to think up a

name like Bone. You know, that's hard to do.

Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, now, George.

George.

Take that, George. Oh, now, come on, quickly. Get out of here.

Oh.

Great. Shut the door. Shut the door.

What's the matter? What's the matter? What's the matter? Did you ever stop to

think what would happen if Baby and George got together?

Oh, they'd probably like each other. And if they didn't? If they didn't, why,

Baby would eat George. Well, that's what I mean.

And there it was straight before me.

Crouching, as tigers do before the kill, you know.

But I was ready for him. I drew a bead, leveled away, and caught him right

between the eyes.

Oh, my, my, it certainly was a thrilling experience.

As I'm sure you'll all agree.

Or do you, Mr. Bone?

Have you ever been... Oh, pardon me. I'm so sorry.

Have you ever been in Arabia, Mr. Bone?

I said, have you ever been in Arabia, mister?

No. Oh, I suppose you've spent most of your time in Africa.

No.

Tibet, perhaps?

No. Mele Peninsula, perchance?

Excuse me.

Well, at least that got a rise out of him.

Well, you see, you shouldn't have mentioned the Malay Peninsula.

He was horribly clawed there by a tiger. He doesn't like talking about it.

I had a gun bearer once who was clawed by a tiger.

He, the poor... I was just telling Major

Applegate that you were horribly clawed by a tiger in the Malay Peninsula.

I've never been there.

You've never, um...

Oh, well, no matter, no matter.

What type of gun do you use in hunting tigers, Mr. Bone?

I personally use a bolt-action mauser with a very large bore.

Excuse me.

Susan, imagine giving a dinner party with your husband stalking like Hamlet's

ghost all through the meal.

Well, give me patience.

No, this is too much. I can't stand it.

Oh, we were talking about the jungle while you were away, Mr. Bones. My soup

is gone. It was cold.

Digging trenches and going on an innocent dog.

Did anyone ever hear such nonsense?

Enough to drive a man crazy.

And then they say...

Keep away from the bottle. Don't drink. No, not even a wee drop to steady a

man's nerves.

If one more thing happens, I'll quit. I'll quit.

And where all the wishes go, goody goes. Misses, all the wishes go, goody goes,

too.

Oh, for God's sake, I'm out of here.

Just picture it. A

vast, mysterious silence, vibrant with life.

Strange cries in the night.

Good gracious, what was that?

That was a loon, Elizabeth.

Loon, L-O-O-N, yes.

I'm sure that once you got the jungle in your blood, I wouldn't be able to keep

you out of it, you know.

Susan, did you hear that?

I didn't hear a thing. You did? Oh.

How is that? Are you quite sure that was a loon? Oh, yes, indeed, Elizabeth. I've

heard many a loon, and if there ever was a loon, that is a loon.

Isn't it, Mr.

Bone?

No. Well, what do you say it was?

A leopard. Oh, don't be ridiculous.

Major Applegate would know a leopard's cry if he heard it. Well, thank you,

Elizabeth. I'm an authority on animal cries. Now you take the rogue elephant,

for instance.

Oh, excuse me, Major. You're right. It is a loon. Oh, thank you. Thank you.

The leopard's cry is something once heard you can never forget.

Oh, yes, I know.

You know, thank you.

Of course, it varies at different seasons.

Let me see. Now, what month is this?

June, June.

June? Well, it would go something like this.

I just prepare for it, you know.

Now, let me see.

There we have it.

Oh, pardon me.

It's still a loon.

Well, of course, I haven't practiced the leopard cry in a long time. I'm slightly

out of voice. Try again, try again.

Yes, I shall, I shall.

Well,

now, I didn't do that.

It was probably an echo.

Yes, well, it was a long time coming back, wasn't it?

Well, try again. Yes, yes, I shall.

There, that's better.

Now, that's peculiar.

There aren't any leopards in Connecticut, are there? Yes. No. Of

course not. Why do you say yes, Mr. Boyd? Well, you see... Excuse me. Excuse

me. Sheldon, Sheldon.

Sit right down and finish your dinner and stop this nonsense. All right, I'll

sit down. You'll be sorry, but I'll sit down. I can't, I can't stand it.

I've got to get away from this. I've got to get away from this.

Instead of sitting decently at the table, eating their dinners, they're

howling and roaring at one another like a lot of banshees.

And then they say, go goody, you mustn't drink.

Go goody, you must keep away from the bottle.

The bottle.

As if a man didn't need something to listen to that. I'm perfectly within

you.

Great.

If one more thing happens to upset me, I'll... I'll be seeing things. I'll be

seeing... Hannah.

Hannah.

Good gracious, now what's happening? No, don't. This is no time for

personalities. Now, where's me gun? Gun?

What would you be wanting of a gun now? Me gun. Me gun. Me gun.

Now,

Gogarty, what is all this?

I saw it. I saw it outside.

Saw what?

A cat, as big as a cow, with eyes like balls of fire.

I'm going to clean up this mess and serve the next course.

Do you realize what happened? Baby's escaped.

I don't care. Come on, we've got to catch him. I've got to watch George.

You're not going to stay here. If you stay here, I'm going to tell Aunt

Elizabeth that your name is Dr. David Huxton. Oh, you wouldn't do that. Right

now. Oh, Susan, don't do that. All right, I'll do anything you say. I'll go

with you.

George, stay there. Oh, Major, have a great night.

Keep an eye on George.

Thank you.

Baby!

Baby! Oh, the door's open.

Nope,

he's gone, all right.

Oh dear, now Aunt Elizabeth is out. Don't lose your head, Susan.

Don't lose my what? Don't lose your head. I've got my head. I've lost my

leopard. Oh dear, oh dear me. Now, now, now, wait a minute. Nothing's going to

be gained by uncontrolled hysteria. Now compose yourself. Well, what shall we

do? Now look, I'll call the zoo, tell them we saw a leopard, and they'll come

and catch him. Now come on.

Well, Susan, I do hope this time you've come to stay.

Yes, I've come to stay, honey.

We've just been walking, walking up and walking down. Where's that young man

going now?

He's just going in to take a rest. He has to take frequent rest. The doctor

says, well, have you ever had jungle fever, Major?

Well, I... Well, then, of course, you realize how important rest is. Well, of

course. Now, for Mr. Bone, in his case, it's rather difficult because he has two

doctors. One says rest, one says exercise.

Which do you prefer?

Well, I think that perhaps... Well, neither can he make up his mind. Listen

to this. What?

This is a cable from Mark.

Mark? Not a particle of sense in it, you know. What does it say? What does it

say? Are you pleased with baby?

Love? Baby?

Mark. Mark?

There's not a word about my leopard.

Le... Your leopard? I've always wanted a leopard. Oh, excuse me. You know, he

promised to... Thank you very much. Thank you.

Don't call the zoo.

Oh, I just... Don't call the zoo. Well, I just called them. It's all fixed.

Call them back and I'll fix it. Well, why?

Don't ask questions. Call them back. But I just told them they could have the

leopard if they found it. You've given away, baby.

You had no right to do that. It doesn't belong to you. Oh, it's all your fault.

You've ruined everything.

Oh, I've had enough. I quit. You can't quit.

Call them back. But you told me to call them in the first place. Everything's

changed. I just found out that that leopard belongs to Aunt Elizabeth. Aunt

Elizabeth, you said it was yours. Never mind. I'll explain later. Just call them

back and tell them that you were mistaken. But, Susan, I've only just

managed to convince them that I did see a leopard. They'll never believe me now.

Oh, well, I can fix that, David. I'll tell them that you're a drug addict,

that you're always seeing things. Oh, never mind. Give me that.

Hurry up.

Hello?

Hello, operator?

Get me Wesley, 284.

I don't know what I'm going to tell them. Oh, never mind, David, what you're

going to tell them. Hello?

Hello? Is that Zoo?

Well, nobody's talking, baby dog.

Well, I'm the man that caught up about the leopard.

You don't have to do anything about it. It's all been a mistake.

Well,

stop them! What's the matter?

What did he say?

Oh, it's too late.

It was the night watchman. He said everybody's gone. They're all out

leopard hunting. Oh, jeepers. You've gotten us into a wonderful mess.

Well, let's see before we act.

You think. You can think faster than I can.

Thank you, David. Now, what do you take with you when you go to catch a leopard?

A bigger leopard. Well, one thing's certain. We've got to catch him before

they do. Oh, I've got to watch George.

I can't... Take George with us. Oh, my God.

Mr. Bolden and I are going to take George for a walk. Where's the leash?

Oh, my goodness. What's the matter? Where's George? Where's George? Now, why

this morbid interest in George? Well, I've got to find him. What for?

Oh, because he knows where my intercostal clavicle is. Your what?

David, don't talk to me about it. Major Appletree, you promised to watch George.

Well, I did do that. But you didn't. Oh, yes, I did. Well, where is he? He's

gone. Gone where?

Yeah, out that door. Why didn't you say so in the business?

No, no, not that door. That door. Oh, thank you very much. Yes, that's right.

Oh, I can't stand this another moment.

Horace, come along. Let's get some fresh air. Yes, shall we run? Yes.

I can't understand, Elizabeth, why a loon would answer a leopard's cry.

There's something wrong, you know. They both sound exactly alike to me. Oh,

pardon me, Elizabeth, please. The leopard's cry is entirely different, you

know. As I explained to you in there, the leopard's cry goes like this.

What a terrible noise. I don't see how you do it. It's done largely with the

palate, you see.

Of course, the hands play an important part in the resonance and carrying

power. But why do you put your thumbs together like that? Well, you see, the

thumbs, it is very necessary that the base of the thumbs are close together

like that. You see, that brings out a sort of a pear-shaped tone, you see?

Now, having done this, you take a deep breath, keep the throat well open, and

out comes...

Why, that's fine, Elizabeth.

For one who hasn't had any practice. Really, it is. I think you've got

something there.

Got what?

The mating cry.

Now, don't be rude, Horace.

Well, Elizabeth, I'm not rude. I was merely alluding to the scream that you

did just now.

I didn't scream.

You didn't scream?

I certainly did not.

You didn't scream?

No. I ought to know if I scream. Well, then there must be something wrong here.

Wrong? Well, I should say so. Why, I never in my life have known anything

like it. Ever since I came into the house, there's been something wrong.

Elizabeth, don't you think it's time we went in the house? No, we've only just

left the house. But don't you think it's a good idea to go back? No, I think it's

a good idea to continue our walk. But don't you find it a bit chilly without a

gun, Elizabeth?

Why don't you sing, David?

Oh, I can't sing.

Yes, you can. You have a fine, strong voice.

Yeah, but not for singing.

It's not fair. You're just being stubborn.

That's a dog.

George. Oh, George.

George, shh. What's the matter?

Something moved in that bush. Oh, oh.

Let me go first.

David, don't you think it'd be better if I went first?

Oh, no, Susan, you might get hurt.

Thank you, David.

I can't see a thing.

Neither can I.

Susan, are you sure you saw something move in here? Because I can't... Well,

Susan, where are you?

Here I am. Susan, this is no time to be playing squat tag.

I'm not playing.

I'm so...

I'm caught on something, David. Help me, will you?

No. Help me, will you? No. Oh, that's poison ivy.

I bet you wouldn't treat Miss Swallow this way.

I'll bet Miss Swallow knows poison ivy when she sees it. Yes, I bet poison ivy

runs when it sees her.

I didn't come out here to discuss Miss Swallow. I came out to look for George,

and I'm going to find him if I can ever get to...

Don't laugh.

but goodness knows how long that's going to last.

Oh, in another minute, my intercostal

clavicle will be gone forever.

across this stream. Oh, surely it's shallow. We can wade across.

Oh. Oh, good.

The riverbed's changed.

Oh, the riverbed's changed.

Did we get across?

No, Susan. We're right back where we started, only we're wet.

Oh, George and baby have disappeared.

The other side.

While I'm wet, I'm going to go to the other side.

Oh, don't leave me.

You know, David, if we'd had a bathhouse, why this wouldn't have been

so complicated.

Next time I'll try and arrange one. Or perhaps there are portable bathhouses

for people like you. There must be. Must be. Oh, David, don't be so grouchy.

We could have such fun. This moonlight and everything is so lovely.

And I do so like being with you.

You do?

Well, I like peace and quiet.

But it's peaceful and quiet here.

Oh, well, let's just stay here and that Georgian baby look for us.

Oh, David, your sock's on fire.

Oh, that's all right. I don't care anymore.

Well?

That's fine. Throw the other one in. Oh, that's true. You could have... Oh, well,

don't be upset, David.

Oh, well, who wouldn't be?

My goodness, Susan, here I am trying to help you find a leopard so that your

aunt Elizabeth won't be angry at you.

And then she'll probably give you the million dollars that I need for my

museum.

Well, if you'd planned it, you couldn't have ruined my chances more completely.

You told your aunt I was crazy, didn't you?

Mm-hmm. You told her my name was Bone, and you didn't tell me.

You told her I was a big game hunter, and you didn't tell me. You tell anybody

anything that comes into your head, and you don't tell me.

Here's something else I didn't tell you either. What now?

Mr. Peabody is coming to see Aunt Elizabeth tonight.

Oh, dear.

Oh, well, that's the end. That's the end, that's all.

Peabody's sure to tell your aunt who I am.

Yeah? He'll never remember those four years' hard work I put in on that

brontosaurus. No.

All he'll remember is that I conked him on the head with a rock last night, he

thinks.

Here. Oh.

Where's that music coming from, David?

Westlake. There's a circus there, a circus.

Charming to my country tonight, boys.

Nina and Mima, they've just escaped from the palace of a sheep. Joe, I got a job

for you.

Boss wants you to take this leopard over to Bridgeport. What happened?

Just gave that new trainer a going over.

Hurt him bad?

Bad? You don't think three minutes alone with that cat did him any good, do you?

Yeah, they should have shot him last summer when he ripped up Caldooney. What

do we do with him?

Yeah, deliver him to this address.

They've got a gas chamber. I phoned over. You go along too, Mac. Who, me?

You heard what I said. Where is Bridgeport? How should I know? Somewhere

out on the state highway. Ask somebody and get going.

Well, that's that.

Come on, Susan, let's get going.

All right.

You sure you don't want my coat? No, David, I'm completely dry already. Well,

let's go.

Hey, look what that is.

Hey, Max, see what that sign says.

David, it's the zoo truck.

Is it?

They've got baby.

Oh! Oh, is George with him?

No, I can't see George, but we've got to get Baby away from them. Oh, no. All I

promised to do was help you find Baby. Well, you found him. Now, listen. All

you have to do is to go and talk to those men in the front of the truck

while I let Baby out the back. Give me that rope. You take this. Well, I know,

but what'll I say to them? Well, they're from the zoo. Tell them you're a

zoologist. Talk about zoos. Go ahead. Go ahead. Come on.

I can't find Bridgeport. You've got the map upside down.

Good evening, gentlemen.

Hello.

May I help you?

Yeah, do you know the way to Bridgeport?

Oh, uh, I'm not going to Bridgeport. No, not you. We're going to Bridgeport. Do

you know which way it is?

Yes. It's that way, ain't it?

Yes. You see? But I thought it was that way.

Uh, well, yes, it is. There, I told you.

Now,

come on.

Come on. I'll get this around your neck. That's a good boy.

Come on, put your head through. Come on, hey.

Hey, what's the big idea?

Get away from me.

Put your head through here and I'll take you back home.

Come on, sweetie.

Come on. Hold.

This guy ain't got all his buttons.

Well, I... You see... Now, we have found distinct evidence... He's escaped.

I just explained to these gentlemen. No, he's escaped.

Oh, he's escaped.

Shall we help you tie him up, lady?

Oh, no, not me. No, you're mistaken, gentlemen. Good night, gentlemen.

Over there.

Oh, we're on the right track now, David, I'm sure.

You see him, David?

No, I think he's further down this way. Well, I'll try over here anyway. Oh,

Susan, I'm absolutely certain the sounds came from down this way.

Oh, what's that?

Somebody's shooting at him.

You'll miss it again.

Quiet!

Don't you... Please stand back. Please, please, please. I won't miss him this

time. No, but you don't understand. We're trying to catch that leopard.

Well, so am I. It's a tame leopard.

I don't like to say so at this moment, sir, but everybody knows you're crazy.

Oh, please don't do that. Susan, please. Well, Susan, why don't you explain to

Major Applegate, and then perhaps you'll catch your leopard. Listen, Major

Applegate, you know that Aunt Elizabeth was expecting a leopard from Brazil,

don't you? I had heard that, yes. Well, that's her leopard, and it's tame.

Impossible. There can be no such thing as a tame... A tame leopard?

A tame leopard. We had it locked up and it escaped.

Are you sure it's quite harmless? Absolutely.

Well, my goodness, why didn't you say so in the first place? Well, I tried to

tell you. Well, I apologize to you, Mr.

Boney. I really do.

Even though it is tame, I think we should try to catch it, don't you? Yes,

but which way did it go?

That way.

Well, we'll go in that direction and you go in that one. Come on, David.

Remember, don't shoot. Oh, no, no, no, of course not.

George! George!

George!

I knew all the time you were staying. Oh, is that so? Yes, I patted him on the

back. Stretched me hand right out, patted him on the back. Well, well,

well. He's as gentle as a kitten. Gentle as a kitten. Well, of course, I don't

know why you didn't mention all this... There he is.

Well,

this will all be quite simple. Let me have that rope, will you?

Now, you hold the gun. We shan't need that any further.

Now, Gogedi, you stand perfectly still and leave everything to me. I've had

vast experience in these matters.

Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.

Come, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty.

Don't you fool me.

You're not afraid of me now, are you? Come, puss, puss, puss.

You say you patted this beast?

Well, in a manner of speaking, I did.

Personally, Gogerty, I think you're a liar.

My rough guess is somewhere near the Canadian border by now.

Oh, no, David. Wait. Oh!

Oh,

my glasses.

Don't move, Susan.

My glasses. Oh, here they are, David. Here they are. Oh, David, they're

broken. I'm so sorry.

Oh, it doesn't make any difference.

The things I've been doing today I can do just as well with my eyes shut.

Well.

Well, anyway, David, you look much handsomer without them. Oh, stop it. Oh,

look, David.

Susan!

I was born on the side of a hill. Susan, stop!

I was born on the side of a hill. Susan, stop!

Oh, now, look, Susan, we're not getting anywhere like this.

Now, you must be very tired, and I suggest that you go home.

Oh, but, David, we can't quit now.

Why, we've let a wild animal loose on an innocent countryside. We can't just go

home and sleep. It wouldn't be right. You misunderstand me. I want you to go

home. But... You mean you want...

Me to go home? Yes.

You mean you don't want me to help you anymore?

No. After all the fun we've had?

Yes. And after all the things I've done for you?

Well, that's what I mean.

Well, all right. I know where I have to go when I'm not wanted.

And don't you worry about me. I can take care of myself.

Oh, my goodness.

Susan. Susan, are you all right? Yes, I'm all right. Did you hurt yourself?

No, I didn't hurt myself.

It's not that. It's just that I'm miserable because you don't like me

anymore. Oh, yes, I do, Susan. You tried to get rid of me, and you just think of

me, and you don't like me anymore.

Your face is dirty, Susan.

Oh, now you're being nice to me, and after all the horrible things I've done

to you, I just can't bear it. Oh, stop crying, Susan, please.

Everything I do with the best intentions seems to turn out badly.

Yes, it does, doesn't it? Oh, David, please let me come with you.

Oh, David.

Well, all right, Susan, you can come with me.

Are you sure you want me?

Yes, yes.

Positive? Yes, you can come. Come on.

Well, don't you worry, David.

Because if there's anything that I can do to help you... Just let me know and

I'll do it.

Well, don't do it until I let you know.

and make him get down.

I suppose you'd like me to climb up and push him down.

Well, maybe we'd better sing.

I can't give you any... Well, sing, David.

I can't give you anything but love, baby.

That's the only thing I can do.

There must be somewhere else you can pay it.

I'm not paying a bet. There's a leopard on your roof.

I am not going to bendy words with you at this time at night.

There is a leopard on your roof, and it's my leopard, and I have to get it,

and to get it, I have to sing.

There's nothing on my roof. Come on, you fool.

There's nothing on your roof. No.

All right, there's nothing on your roof.

Happiness, and I guess all those things you always... Poor girl.

You'd better go down, Fritz.

Sing if you like, dear.

Thank you as well, baby.

You can sing, too.

Diamond bracelets will worse never sell, baby.

Oh, baby, don't. Oh, why did you have to do that? You frightened him away.

Quiet. It's all right. It's not all right. Don't worry. Well, I have to

worry. I've lost my levito. Please help me find it. I certainly will. You just

come with me. But you don't understand. He went that way. Oh, no, he didn't. Oh,

yes, he did. I saw him. Oh, you're wrong. He's up there. See him? There.

Where? There, peeking around the corner. See it?

No, I don't.

Hey, hey, there's nothing there.

There's nothing there. Oh, yes, there is. You just come along into the house.

You let me go. I don't want to go with you. You don't seem to understand that

there's a million dollars at stake. A million dollars? Yes. Well, you'll get

it. We have it right in there. All in one dollar bills.

Now, you just come along. Oh, no. Don't do this to me. Oh, let me go.

It's like you're peeping, Tom.

Peeping, Tom, eh?

Get your gun out and we'll nab him.

Stick him up, I tell you.

Come on, grab him, Albert. Oh, George!

I have to get my dog!

George, don't go away, George!

What

are you

doing? I have a hairpin.

Oh.

Well, I did it once with a trunk.

Anyway, David, when they find out who we are, they'll let us out. When they find

out who you are, they'll pad the cell.

We picked up a girl who says she's your niece.

Now the question is, have you or have you not got a niece?

Of course I have a niece, but she's not singing around under windows.

She's decently in bed.

I wouldn't be too sure, Elizabeth.

Oh, Horace, do be quiet. I'll talk to you presently. Now, lady, do you

definitely refuse to come down and identify this girl?

If you continue to annoy me about this girl, who is no responsibility of mine,

I'll have you arrested.

The idea... Hello.

She says her niece is in bed.

Uh-huh. Just what I expected. That girl is lying.

Doc, I think you're right. I think they're both lying. Now, what are you

going to do about it?

Well, what would you do? Find out the truth.

You're right. I'll go back and have a little talk with them.

Come on, Elmer.

Look here, you two.

Get your ears up like a rabbit, because we've got something to tell you. If you

ever want to get out of this jail, you better listen. I'm listening. Quiet,

young lady. I'm going to get to you later. I want you to tell me the truth,

the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Well, what did my aunt say?

Hey, quiet, please. What did my aunt say?

Your aunt? Why, she said... Now, young lady, you haven't got an answer. But I

certainly have got an answer. Quiet, quiet, please.

Now, look here, young fella.

I want you to tell me just exactly what were you doing tonight? Well, we were

hunting for a leopard. You were hunting for a leopard. Now, now, now, look here.

Look here, young lady. Now, you know, that's silly. There never was a leopard

in the whole state of Connecticut. Well, there is now.

Now, young lady, listen here.

I'm going to stay here if it takes all year. I am waiting for you to tell the

truth. Oh, if you're going to wait for her to tell the truth, you'll have a

long gray beard down to here. You know, it's a funny thing. My grandfather

had... Quiet, young man. Listen, I don't want any more slick remarks out of you.

This is a jail. I want you to have a little respect for the law. I'm just

trying to explain, Mr. Constable. You see... It all started over at my aunt...

at her aunt's house. Her aunt's house, yes, yes. You see, her aunt promised to

give me... Hold on. Hold on there, bub. Just a minute. She hasn't got an aunt. I

certainly have. She's my father's sister.

Now, look here, constable. Come over here. Young lady. Stop wasting your

time. Now, quiet.

Now, look here. You want us to get out of here, don't you? Oh, lady, yes, I

certainly do. Well, now, I gave you my aunt's telephone number, didn't I? Yep.

And you called her up, didn't you? I sure did. And what did she say?

Well... She said that you were home in bed.

Then what am I doing here? Well, you're here because your aunt, she said... Now,

confound it, lady, you know that you haven't got an aunt. But if I did have

an aunt... She'd muzzle you. Now, look here, you can't talk to me that way.

Now, how do you know we would be here? I don't like to see young people in

trouble. I have children of my own. Listen, I don't care anything about your

family. All I want to do is to get out of here. I haven't got time to waste

sitting around in a jail in Connecticut.

We'll arrive at a definite conclusion. Now, go away, go away, please. Oh, shut

up, David. Now, David, please be quiet.

Now, let me tell you what happened.

We left New York at 11 o'clock this morning in a... You're not going to get

anywhere with her. You just come with me. That's better. If one of us talk at

a time, now we're really getting somewhere.

Now then, speak up and speak fast.

Oh! Elmer!

Elmer! Get the key here, quick. Lock him up. Lock him up.

Well, fine, officer, you are locking up a dangerous criminal without locking him

up. It's not locked. Oh, thank you.

I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there.

I'm sitting there.

I'm sitting there. I'm sitting there.

I'm sitting there.

I'm sitting there.

I'm sitting there.

No man is going to call and wish us goagaday, Carty. Come on, come on, stop

it. Have him, have him. Lock him up, lock him up. Here, let go.

Let go.

Let me out there.

I've been holding you for a while.

Hello, Golgarby.

Ah, Miss Shulgin, how did you get here?

Influence.

Don't worry, Golgarby, I'll get you out. Oh, sure, sure. Look, she got me out.

Say, hold on here. Do you know this young lady? Of course I do. Don't I work

for her aunt?

You what?

Don't you work for her, aren't you? Now look here.

If one more person mentions that she's got an aunt, I'll put you all on bread

and water for 30 days.

Well, where is everyone?

Who's in charge here?

Right in there. Hey, constable.

What do you mean by locking up my niece? I won't stand for giving the keys. Come

along, come along, come along. Madam, madam, you're hysterical. Say, what is

it you want? She wants her niece. I certainly do. I want my niece right

here. Well, who is your niece? You give us a description of her and they find

her. She's about so tall.

Aunt Elizabeth, Aunt Elizabeth, is that you?

There she is now.

Hold on here, hold on now, just a minute. Lady, tell me, who are you? I am

Mrs. Carlton Random and I want my niece. Oh, so you're Mrs. Carlton Random. I

certainly am. And you say your niece is here? She certainly is. Ha, that's where

I got you. The young lady we got here ain't got no aunt. And you're not Mrs.

Carlton Random because I talked to Mrs. Carlton Random on the telephone not ten

minutes ago.

Well, I ought to know who I am.

Yes, you should, Elizabeth, I think. You did talk to her ten minutes ago on the

telephone, that's right. How do you know? I was there.

Who are you? I'm the niece.

I'm Major Horace Applegate of the Explorers Club.

What are you doing with that gun?

I have been hunting leopards.

Oh, you've been hunting leopards? I said so. I've been hunting leopards, yes.

Any luck? Well, not what I'm accustomed to, no. I have been a bit confused

regarding the leopards here.

You have something on your mind, haven't you?

Not so fast, not so fast, lady. We just want to find out.

This old battleaxe we got here keeps yelling that she's Mrs. Random. That's

ridiculous.

Mrs. Random is in bed.

And don't you be calling up here again.

Good night.

Good night.

Just as you said, Doc, they're all lying.

Obviously. I have no doubt you will find you made a very important haul. Yeah,

thanks to you, Doc. If you get their confessions, Constable, there'll be a

lot of things you'll turn up. Yeah, well, I'll try it again.

Come on, boys.

Quiet!

Quiet! Now, look here, I warn you.

The first one lets a squeak out of him, I'm going to put in solitary

confinement. I'm going to ask this young man a few questions and I want absolute

quiet. Now, young man, you said your name is Bone. Do you stick to it? Well,

for any good, we don't believe you. We know that's an alias. Now, we know that

ain't your right name. You're all impersonating somebody. What were you

doing trying to break into Dr. Lehman's house? I was after a leopard.

Leopard. Hey, a doctor still stick to it. All agreed on one story.

How about that bank robbery in Old Town?

Oh, what about it? How much did they get? Oh, they got a pretty penny. Must

have got 5,600. Say, who's asking these questions? You or me?

Who was with you last month in Rockdale in that mail truck job?

Mickey the Mouse and Donald the Duck. Mickey the Mouse and Donald the Duck.

Doc, make a note of them names.

Now, you beginning to talk? We're getting someplace.

Now, you and fella speak up. Quiet, lady. I'm waiting for you. Hey! Quiet,

lady. Speak up now. Hey, Flatfoot!

You ain't getting no place.

Come here.

Me? Yes, you. Come on. Hold it over. Hold it over.

You want someone to talk, don't you?

Well, it's about time. I certainly do. Yeah, well, get me out of this cooler

and I'll unbutton my puss and shoot the works.

You'll love it.

Say, hold on, lady. I thought that you were... Hey,

you ain't no lady.

Yeah, I kind of had you fooled for a minute, didn't I?

You sure did.

What did I tell you my name was?

Why, your name is... Doc, what's your name? Susan Vance. Susan Vance.

That's my society moniker.

But the marble calls me Swingin' Door Susie. Swingin' Door Susie? Now do you

peg me?

Come on, toots, open up.

Stop that, stop that.

I'm not opening any doors around here until you promise to talk.

Listen, I'll talk. I'll talk so much it'll make your hair curl.

You'll talk, do you hear that, Doc? She's promised to talk. All right, I'll

open her up. Susan, it won't work. Whatever it is, it won't work.

Swingin' Door Susie hasn't flopped yet.

I'm out this far, ain't I?

Well, so long, gang.

I'm not taking a rap for this job. It's every man for himself.

Now, here, here. Quiet, quiet.

You know what I told you when I met her? You too.

Ah, quit peeping. Get by to yourself. The heat's on, Jerry.

Jerry? Jerry?

Ain't his name Bone? Bone?

Ah, you mean to say you don't remember Jerry the Nipper? Jerry the Nipper?

Make a note of that, Doc. Constable, she's making all this up out of motion

pictures she sees. Oh, I suppose I saw you with that red-headed skirt in a

motion picture. There you are, Doc, another woman. Sure, I wouldn't be

squealing if he hadn't given me the runaround for that other twist.

Oh, so he's a lady killer. A lady killer? Why, he's a regular darn swan.

Loves the ladies, don't you, honey? He bops them over, one, two, three, boom,

just like that.

He's a wolf. Oh, now I'm a wolf.

Now, uh, Susie, I want you to tell the truth, you understand?

You'll never get into trouble. I notice you're limping there. Suppose you got

shot in one of them stick-ups. No, I lost my heel.

Well, don't bother about him. Just sit right down there. Come on, Doc, grab

this chair.

Here, Alma, grab ahold of that typewriter. I want to get this whole

thing now in affidavit form.

Now, look here, young lady, I want you to talk, and I want you to talk...

Cigarette me, then I'll talk. I don't smoke cigarettes.

Well, I guess this will have to do. Huh?

Oh, it's a twofer. What's that? Twofer and nickel. Give me a match. Here.

Now, look here, I'm not gonna stand for that in this jail. No smoking, no

talking. Put me back in the cell, wrap me up again.

Ain't gonna talk unless I have a cigarette. Now, now, now, hold here.

Just sit down. Sit down. She won't talk without a cigarette. Here, Doc, give her

one of them cigarettes.

Now, then, if you just tell the truth, why, we'll make it as easy as we can.

Hey, my kiss, if you please. Oh, well, well, well, now, there I go again.

Sorry, boys, false habit. Forgot where it was for a minute.

Now, hey.

How about a little fresh air? It's kind of hot in here.

Yes, it is a little bit muggy, isn't it? It's always that way around here at this

time of year.

The humidity.

Now, uh, what about the claghorn jewels? Ah, that's hot ice, mister. We're

waiting for it to cool off. We're waiting for it to cool... Where? What do

you mean, we? The gang, the gang, all of us. You mean to say that you all belong

to the same gang? Sure, the leopard gang.

A leopard gang. That's what I'm after, Doc. We'll round them all up with one

fell swoop. You got that, Doc? I got it. Fine. How about you, Elmer? Not so fast,

Ed. This is new to me.

Say, hold on, you fool. You can't spell leopard with a U. How do you spell it?

W. W.

What about that bank robbery? Boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. Wasn't that a honey?

Wasn't that a pimp? A leader job has never been pulled in this neck of the

woods. Jerry was the inside man on that job. Oh, he was, was he? Were you there,

too? Sure. What do you think? I'm a one-man woman. Where my man goes, I go.

And if it only knocks my block off.

Babyface Horace, he's the trigger man. Wait a minute. You're talking too fast.

What's that?

Confound it, Doc. Look at there. You only got as far as the plague horn, too.

Now I got to say it all over.

Now, young lady, I... Say.

Oh, there she goes. She's got my car again.

Come on, boys. After her. Hurry up. Get her. Get her.

There she goes.

Go get her, boys. Go get her. If you don't bring her back, there's going to

be a shake-up in this department.

Gentlemen, go get her.

Bye. She's going to get my hands on her. I'll lock her up.

Yes, Stan, what do you want? I'm looking for... Now, don't tell me that you're

looking for a leper to buy a jingle. I'll lock you up. I'm looking for Mrs.

Carlton Random.

Well, so is everybody else. Let me tell you, she's not here.

I have reason to believe she is here. Say, who are you?

I'm her attorney, Alexander Peabody. And I'm Miss Swallow. I'm looking for a man

by the name of Dr. Huxley.

Dr. David Huxley.

Is he here with Mrs. Random? Oh, now, lady, look here. The only folks we got

here is an old woman who keeps saying that she's Mrs. Random. Then we got a

gangster here by the name of Bone. Then we have Babyface Horace. Stop it. Then

we have... Stop! What is it you want? I can identify this gentleman.

You may remember, Mr. Peabody, I testified for you during the breaking of

the Borden Will. Yes, I remember. I demand to see my client at once.

Slocum, you may have made a mistake.

And if you have made a mistake, your position as constable in this county

will be in serious jeopardy. Are you sure that he's the old lady's attorney?

Positively.

Election next week, too.

Mr. Peabody, you just step right inside here now, and we'll straighten this

thing out.

Well, here you are. Now, is she or ain't she Mrs. Random?

Well, Alec, it's just about time you came. Of course she's Mrs. Random. This

is absurd. Open that door at once. Well, all right. What about him? Oh, but

David, I don't understand.

Well, Alice, it's just one of those things. I can't explain it. It happened,

and here I am. Yes, and in the last place in the world, I expected to find

you. Oh, I don't like it any better than you do it. Oh, really, David? And let

that young man out, too.

Oh, shucks. Looks like I got the whole thing fuddled up. Well, I'm sorry.

That's all I can say about it. You haven't heard the end of this either,

huh?

Huxley!

What did you mean by throwing rocks at me last night? Well, you see, I... Well,

you mean to tell me that this is the young man you wanted me to donate a

million dollars to for his museum? Yes, yes. No, no, no, no. I did, but I've

changed my mind. Oh, David, what have you done?

Just name anything and I've done it.

Hey, Joe, what are you going to tell him? Tell him the truth. We lost the

leopard.

Hey, are you the constable around here?

Well, I am until the next election anyway. What is it you want? We need

some help. Well, that's what I'm here for, to serve the public. What is it?

Well, we're looking for... Well, we're looking for... Now, now, now. Don't tell

me that you're looking for a leopard.

How did you know that?

Huh?

Know what?

That we're looking for a leopard.

Now, look here. This has gone far enough. There are no leopards in the

state of...

That's a bad cat. Somebody get a gun. He's a killer. Don't be alarmed, Alice.

There's no need to be frightened, gentlemen. Everything's going to be all

right.

Hello, baby.

Is this my leopard?

Yes, that's the baby.

He didn't act that way with me, did he? Wait a minute.

That ain't my leopard.

Well, of course it isn't. That's why I took it out of the truck.

You never let that one out of the truck. You couldn't touch our cat with a ten

-foot pole.

You... You mean to say there's another leopard?

That's what I'm trying to tell you. Our cat came from the circus. He just clawed

a man.

He's bad.

Oh, my goodness.

Susan's out trying to catch the wrong leopard.

Oh, poor darling Susan. She's in danger and she's helpless without me.

Oh, what's the matter with you? You've been slapping at me the whole way. Now,

come on, we've got to get in here and you might as well come.

Now, listen, I'm just as determined as you are, so you might just

as well come with me because I'm gonna drag you in here.

I don't like Nell any more than you do, but this is where we've got to be.

Hey, David!

Well, did I fool you this time? You thought I was doing the wrong thing, but

I've got him.

No, you haven't, Susan. Look!

Well, there's nothing else I can say, except that I'm glad that before our

marriage, you showed yourself up in your true colors.

You're just a butterfly.

Oh, now I'm a butterfly.

Oh, there you are.

David. I followed George around for three days, and I dug holes with him,

and he dug holes with me, and then he came and put it in my shoe.

Darling, look.

Oh.

Oh, well, David, don't be mad at me.

Thank you very much, Susan. Put it down there on the table and go away.

Mm-hmm.

Hey, but wait a minute. I don't want to go away. I want to talk to you. Write me

a letter. Don't... Oh, oh, go, go, go, go back, Susan. Go.

Oh, Jesus, it's high up here.

Susan, now look.

Please, go back down the ladder quietly.

Well, when I go down, I'll go down quietly, David. But I want to find out

something first.

Why did you run up that ladder when I came in here?

Well, if you must know, I'm afraid of you. But, David, if you're afraid of me,

well, then that's the same as admitting that you... Dad!

Oh, oh!

Well, don't worry, David. Everything's going to be all right. I'll take it.

Every time you say that, something happens. Now, now... Please go down,

because you've already cost the museum a million dollars.

Oh, no, I haven't, David. I've got the million dollars.

Aunt Elizabeth gave it to me, and I'm going to give it to you for the museum.

Oh, well, I'm sure they'll be very pleased.

Aren't you pleased, David?

Yes, I suppose so, dear. It's too late, isn't it?

I've made a mess of everything, haven't I? Oh, no, no. Oh, I was so happy when I

found the bone this morning.

Oh, David, if I could only make you understand, you see, all that... It

happened because I was trying to keep you near me and I just did anything that

came into my head.

I'm so sorry. I ought to thank you.

Thank me?

Yes. You see, well, I've just discovered that was the best day I ever had in my

whole life.

David, you don't mean that. I never had a better time.

But I was there. Well, that's what made it so good.

Oh, did you really have a good time? Yes, I did.

Oh, that's wonderful.

Do you realize? What that means, that means that you must like me a little

bit. Susan, it's more than that. Is it? Yes, I love you, I think. Oh, that's

wonderful, because I love you, too.

Stop rocking. Oh, I'm not rocking.