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1
00:00:51,685 --> 00:00:54,288
[THREE KNOCKS]
2
00:00:59,727 --> 00:01:01,462
[STATIC]
3
00:01:04,665 --> 00:01:06,200
[STATIC CONTINUES]
4
00:01:24,685 --> 00:01:28,156
[PHONE RINGING]
5
00:01:28,189 --> 00:01:32,160
- [BEEPING SOUND]
- [MAN] HI, MY NAME IS ABEL
6
00:01:32,193 --> 00:01:35,629
AND I SAW A POST
ON BLACKOUT'S FACEBOOK PAGE
7
00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:38,599
THAT A DOCUMENTARY
IS BEING MADE...
8
00:01:38,699 --> 00:01:42,170
[MAN #2] ...IS BEING
MADE ABOUT BLACKOUT
9
00:01:42,270 --> 00:01:45,206
AND THAT THIS IS THE BEST WAY TO
GET IN TOUCH WITH THE FILMMAKERS.
10
00:01:45,306 --> 00:01:47,441
[WOMAN] YEAH,
THAT YOU GUYS ARE LOOKING FOR PEOPLE
11
00:01:47,541 --> 00:01:50,311
TO INTERVIEW, SO I WAS INTERESTED
IN SPEAKING WITH YOU GUYS.
12
00:01:50,411 --> 00:01:51,479
[MAN #3]
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
13
00:01:51,579 --> 00:01:53,080
THE FILMMAKERS
ARE LOOKING FOR,
14
00:01:53,181 --> 00:01:55,616
BUT IF YOU THINK
I MIGHT BE USEFUL--
15
00:01:55,716 --> 00:01:57,518
[MAN #4] HAVEN'T BEEN TO
BLACKOUT, BUT, UH,
16
00:01:57,618 --> 00:01:59,220
IT SOUNDS INTRIGUING
17
00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:00,621
AND I'D LOVE
TO BE CONSIDERED.
18
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:03,291
THANKS, GUYS.
TALK TO YOU SOON. BYE-BYE.
19
00:02:11,732 --> 00:02:15,636
[MAN #5] SO, THIS WAS GOING
TO BE AN OFFICE CALENDAR
20
00:02:15,736 --> 00:02:18,206
MARKING SOME DEADLINES
THAT I NEEDED TO MEET
21
00:02:18,239 --> 00:02:20,441
BUT IT BECAME
MY BLACKOUT CALENDAR,
22
00:02:20,541 --> 00:02:23,444
WHICH IS, BASICALLY,
A COUNTDOWN
23
00:02:23,544 --> 00:02:25,879
TO BLACKOUT.
24
00:02:25,979 --> 00:02:27,648
AND, OF COURSE, I HAVE IT
IN THE CORNER OF MY OFFICE
25
00:02:27,748 --> 00:02:29,217
AND PEOPLE KEEP
ASKING ME,
26
00:02:29,250 --> 00:02:31,385
"WHAT ARE
THE THREE DOTS FOR?"
27
00:02:31,485 --> 00:02:35,223
I USED TO WAKE UP EARLY
ON SATURDAY MORNINGS
28
00:02:35,289 --> 00:02:37,425
AND THERE USED TO BE
A TV STATION
29
00:02:37,525 --> 00:02:40,561
OUT OF NEW ORLEANS, LOUISIANA,
WE GOT THE SIGNAL FOR
30
00:02:40,661 --> 00:02:43,531
AND THEY WOULD RUN
MONSTER MOVIES
31
00:02:43,631 --> 00:02:45,233
AT 9:00 AM.
32
00:02:50,371 --> 00:02:53,341
VERY EARLY ON, THE THING
THAT I WAS DRAWN TO
33
00:02:53,441 --> 00:02:55,276
WAS THE DARK STUFF.
34
00:03:00,448 --> 00:03:03,317
IT-- IT SPEAKS
TO ME.
35
00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,362
[KEYS JINGLING]
36
00:03:14,462 --> 00:03:16,897
[METAL SCRAPING SURFACE]
37
00:03:16,997 --> 00:03:19,333
A FRIEND OF A FRIEND,
WE WERE TALKING AT LUNCH ONE DAY
38
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:21,269
AND HE SAID, "WELL,
HAVE YOU HEARD OF THIS THING
39
00:03:21,302 --> 00:03:22,470
CALLED BLACKOUT?"
40
00:03:22,570 --> 00:03:24,505
AND I HADN'T.
41
00:03:24,605 --> 00:03:26,574
AND THEN AS SOON AS I DID
A LITTLE RESEARCH ON IT
42
00:03:26,674 --> 00:03:29,176
I-I HAD TO EXPERIENCE IT.
43
00:03:29,277 --> 00:03:31,512
I KNEW THAT
I HAD TO TRY THIS.
44
00:03:35,283 --> 00:03:38,419
[MAN #6] THIS IS THE
BLACKOUT WEB SITE THAT I SAW.
45
00:03:40,354 --> 00:03:41,755
REALLY SCARY.
46
00:03:41,855 --> 00:03:44,325
BUT AFTER LOOKING
AT THE WEB SITE
47
00:03:44,425 --> 00:03:46,527
I STARTED TO HAVE
SOME SECOND THOUGHTS
48
00:03:46,627 --> 00:03:49,530
ABOUT WHETHER OR NOT
I SHOULD DO THIS.
49
00:03:49,630 --> 00:03:52,433
THE PART THAT
SCARED ME THE MOST
50
00:03:52,533 --> 00:03:53,967
WAS WHEN IT SAID
THAT I HAD TO SIGN
51
00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:57,471
A RELEASE FORM
PROMISING NOT TO SUE
52
00:03:57,571 --> 00:03:58,772
IF ANYTHING GOES WRONG
53
00:03:58,872 --> 00:04:02,310
OR, YOU KNOW,
ANYTHING BAD HAPPENS TO ME.
54
00:04:02,376 --> 00:04:04,211
AND I'M LIKE, "OH, MY GOD.
AM I SIGNING MY LIFE AWAY
55
00:04:04,312 --> 00:04:06,414
GOING TO THIS,
UH, THIS PLACE?"
56
00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:15,656
[MAN #7] EVER SINCE
I FIRST SAW THE SIGN
57
00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:17,325
THAT SAID "BLACKOUT"
58
00:04:17,391 --> 00:04:19,760
AND IT SHOWED
THIS WOMAN TERRIFIED
59
00:04:19,860 --> 00:04:21,329
WITH THIS MASK ON
60
00:04:21,362 --> 00:04:23,230
I THOUGHT--
MY MIND HAS BEEN REELING
61
00:04:23,331 --> 00:04:24,398
AND I'VE BEEN THINKING
62
00:04:24,498 --> 00:04:26,400
"WHAT COULD THEY
POSSIBLY DO TO ME?"
63
00:04:28,736 --> 00:04:30,371
[ABEL]
BY TELLING YOU
64
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:32,673
THAT YOU HAVE
TO SIGN A CONTRACT
65
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:34,241
THEN BY TELLING YOU
66
00:04:34,342 --> 00:04:36,243
THAT YOU HAVE TO GO
THROUGH IT ALONE
67
00:04:36,344 --> 00:04:38,479
AND GIVE NO OTHER INFORMATION
ABOUT WHAT WAS GONNA HAPPEN
68
00:04:38,579 --> 00:04:40,748
ONCE YOU'RE INSIDE
OF THERE,
69
00:04:40,848 --> 00:04:43,651
THEY TOOK ME INTO FEAR.
70
00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,388
YOU ARE RELEASING CONTROL
71
00:04:47,488 --> 00:04:50,257
AND YOU DON'T HAVE
ANYONE TO PROTECT YOU.
72
00:04:50,358 --> 00:04:51,792
THAT'S TERRIFYING.
73
00:04:53,627 --> 00:04:54,795
AND I REMEMBER
ME JUST
74
00:04:54,895 --> 00:04:57,665
HOVERING OVER
MY KEYBOARD.
75
00:04:57,765 --> 00:05:01,602
TRYING TO CONVINCE MYSELF
TO GO TO BLACKOUT.
76
00:05:04,405 --> 00:05:07,808
AND MY THOUGHT WAS,
"IF I DON'T DO IT,
77
00:05:07,908 --> 00:05:09,710
I'LL ALWAYS WONDER
WHAT IT WAS."
78
00:05:18,486 --> 00:05:20,721
[WOMAN SIGHS]
79
00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:25,559
OH, I AM
SO FUCKING NERVOUS.
80
00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:29,062
- [TURN SIGNAL CLICKING]
- I PAID FOR THIS.
81
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,065
I'M NOT SCARED.
82
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:34,402
'CAUSE
I DON'T LOOK SCARED.
83
00:05:34,502 --> 00:05:39,072
I AM VERY,
VERY NERVOUS.
84
00:05:39,172 --> 00:05:41,475
I'M, LIKE, SHAKING.
[CHUCKLES]
85
00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:55,423
I SEE A CAMERA ON
AND IT'S WATCHING ME.
86
00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,332
IT'S TIME.
87
00:06:05,433 --> 00:06:07,901
[THREE KNOCKS]
88
00:06:08,001 --> 00:06:09,837
- [DOOR CLICKS]
- OH!
89
00:06:09,937 --> 00:06:11,572
[STATIC]
90
00:06:11,672 --> 00:06:12,873
[MUFFLED YELLING]
91
00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:20,481
[MAN #8] SO,
IT'S APPROXIMATELY 11:50 PM
92
00:06:20,581 --> 00:06:23,884
AND I AM WAITING
ANXIOUSLY FOR
93
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:25,553
THAT MIDNIGHT E-MAIL
TO COME.
94
00:06:46,940 --> 00:06:49,843
[WOMAN #2] I JUST GOT
AN E-MAIL FROM BLACKOUT.
95
00:06:49,943 --> 00:06:52,713
THE E-MAIL IS...
96
00:06:52,813 --> 00:06:54,782
SOMEONE THAT LOOKS LIKE
THEY'RE IN KIND OF,
97
00:06:54,882 --> 00:06:55,883
LIKE, A WOODEN COFFIN
98
00:06:55,983 --> 00:06:58,519
WITH A BAG
OVER THEIR HEADS.
99
00:06:58,619 --> 00:07:01,522
AND THERE'S, LIKE,
SPIDER WEBS EVERYWHERE.
100
00:07:01,622 --> 00:07:03,924
IT'S ACTUALLY
REALLY CREEPY.
101
00:07:05,759 --> 00:07:07,394
I DON'T KNOW HOW
I WOULD DEAL WITH BEING
102
00:07:07,495 --> 00:07:09,497
UNDRESSED WITH A BAG
OVER MY HEAD.
103
00:07:11,565 --> 00:07:14,167
I AM, MYSELF,
A RECOVERING ADDICT.
104
00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,838
I WAS ADDICTED
TO INHALANTS.
105
00:07:17,938 --> 00:07:21,842
WHEN I WAS USING INHALANTS I
WOULD HALLUCINATE BUGS EVERYWHERE.
106
00:07:21,942 --> 00:07:23,711
[HISSING, CHIRPING]
107
00:07:28,849 --> 00:07:30,518
[MAN #6]
IT IS GONNA BE NERVE-RACKING
108
00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:32,152
THAT I WON'T KNOW
WHERE EXACTLY I'M GOING
109
00:07:32,252 --> 00:07:33,987
UNTIL THE NIGHT
BEFORE I'M GOING.
110
00:07:36,056 --> 00:07:37,658
THE FACT THAT
THEY'RE KEEPING IT SECRET
111
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:39,960
IS ADDING TO MY DREAD
112
00:07:40,060 --> 00:07:42,530
BECAUSE IT KINDA
GIVES ME THE IMPRESSION
113
00:07:42,630 --> 00:07:44,832
THAT MAYBE THESE PEOPLE
HAVE SOMETHING TO HIDE.
114
00:07:44,932 --> 00:07:47,601
[STATIC]
115
00:07:55,609 --> 00:07:57,645
WELL, I THOUGHT
MY NERVOUSNESS
116
00:07:57,745 --> 00:08:00,548
HAD TURNED INTO EXCITEMENT
THIS MORNING
117
00:08:00,614 --> 00:08:02,583
'CAUSE I AM EXCITED
118
00:08:02,683 --> 00:08:03,951
'CAUSE BLACKOUT
IS TONIGHT.
119
00:08:04,051 --> 00:08:07,555
I-I'VE LITERALLY
LEFT MY HOME THREE TIMES.
120
00:08:07,655 --> 00:08:11,892
I FORGOT MY CAR-- I LEFT--
LOST MY CAR KEYS ONCE.
121
00:08:11,992 --> 00:08:15,563
[VOICE FADES]
I'VE FORGOTTEN THINGS TWICE...
122
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,903
[MAN #6] WHY ARE YOU
GOING THROUGH WITH THIS?
123
00:08:23,003 --> 00:08:26,707
I KNOW IT SOUNDS
SILLY, BUT...
124
00:08:26,807 --> 00:08:29,242
I-- UH, NO-- IT'S JUST THAT,
YOU KNOW, WE ALL LIVE ONCE
125
00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,679
AND I GUESS
WE ALL WANT TO--
126
00:08:31,779 --> 00:08:33,881
WE ALL WANT TO DO SOMETHING
THAT'S A LITTLE
127
00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:36,984
RISK-TAKING OR SCARY,
YOU KNOW, ONCE IN A WHILE.
128
00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:39,620
AND, I GUESS,
MAYBE, YOU KNOW,
129
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:41,689
FOR MOST PART OF LIFE
HAS BEEN PRETTY BORING
130
00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,223
AND THAT'S WHY...
131
00:08:43,323 --> 00:08:45,893
WE DO THIS.
132
00:08:45,993 --> 00:08:48,762
THEY DID ASK WHAT WERE
OUR PHYSICAL LIMITATIONS
133
00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:52,900
AND I MENTIONED
THAT I HAVE BAD KNEES
134
00:08:53,000 --> 00:08:56,637
AND THAT I CAN
SUFFOCATE EASILY
135
00:08:56,737 --> 00:09:00,608
WHEN A PLASTIC BAG
IS PUT OVER MY HEAD.
136
00:09:00,674 --> 00:09:02,643
[THREE KNOCKS]
137
00:09:05,078 --> 00:09:07,615
[STATIC]
138
00:09:23,163 --> 00:09:26,033
[STATIC CONTINUES]
139
00:09:29,870 --> 00:09:31,805
[OBJECT BANGING]
140
00:09:36,076 --> 00:09:37,811
[ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
141
00:09:42,382 --> 00:09:43,884
[EXHALES]
142
00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:49,289
[SIGHS]
143
00:09:49,389 --> 00:09:52,559
[RUSSELL] WALKING OUT OF A
BUSINESS MEETING AT NIGHT
144
00:09:52,660 --> 00:09:54,795
THREE GUYS JUMPED ME
AND THEY STOLE MY WALLET.
145
00:09:55,963 --> 00:09:57,798
AND, UH,
146
00:09:57,898 --> 00:09:59,099
I ENDED UP
WITH A BACK INJURY
147
00:09:59,199 --> 00:10:00,668
AND I ENDED UP
WITH A NECK INJURY
148
00:10:00,768 --> 00:10:01,735
AND I ENDED UP
WITH A BLACK EYE
149
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:04,738
OUT OF THE SITUATION.
150
00:10:04,838 --> 00:10:07,808
SO, I HAVE BEEN THE VICTIM
OF VIOLENT CRIME.
151
00:10:09,710 --> 00:10:11,712
THERE WAS SOME
RESIDUAL STUFF.
152
00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:14,748
A WEEK AFTER THAT
I HAD AN ANXIETY ATTACK.
153
00:10:16,049 --> 00:10:18,786
JUST THAT WEIRD,
EMOTIONAL--
154
00:10:18,886 --> 00:10:22,823
THAT COULD'VE BEEN SO MUCH
MORE SERIOUS THAN IT WAS.
155
00:10:22,923 --> 00:10:25,993
THAT COULD'VE BEEN
SO MUCH MORE VIOLENT
156
00:10:26,093 --> 00:10:28,061
THAN IT WAS.
157
00:10:28,161 --> 00:10:30,764
[SIGHING CONTINUES]
158
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,842
[THREE KNOCKS]
159
00:10:43,076 --> 00:10:46,814
[SIGHS]
"I, RUSSELL CORLAN EATON,
160
00:10:46,914 --> 00:10:49,149
- [STATIC]
- AM HERE OF MY OWN VOLITION.
161
00:10:49,249 --> 00:10:52,753
- [GRUNTS]
- I WANT THE PUBLIC TO KNOW
162
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:56,056
I AM PART OF BLACKOUT.
163
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:59,727
I AM PREPARED--
164
00:10:59,827 --> 00:11:01,829
I AM PREPARED
TO BE MARKED.
165
00:11:01,929 --> 00:11:05,999
I AM READY
TO BE BRANDED.
166
00:11:06,099 --> 00:11:10,738
I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU."
167
00:11:10,838 --> 00:11:13,040
[GROANS, EXHALES]
168
00:11:37,064 --> 00:11:39,032
[MUFFLED GRUNT]
169
00:11:39,132 --> 00:11:40,968
[WOMAN GROANING]
170
00:11:46,306 --> 00:11:49,176
YES.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
171
00:11:49,276 --> 00:11:52,679
- [EXHALES]
- WHOA!
172
00:11:52,780 --> 00:11:55,682
OH!
LORD, HELP RUSSELL BREATHE.
173
00:11:55,783 --> 00:11:56,950
HELP HIM BREATHE.
174
00:11:57,050 --> 00:11:58,685
- [MUFFLED GROANS]
- HE WANTS TO BREATHE.
175
00:11:58,786 --> 00:12:00,788
OPEN YOUR EYES
AND LOOK AT ME.
176
00:12:00,854 --> 00:12:03,123
THAT'S IT. THERE YOU GO.
GOOD, GOOD, GOOD.
177
00:12:03,223 --> 00:12:05,692
- [BREATHING HEAVILY]
- GOOD, GOOD.
178
00:12:05,793 --> 00:12:08,228
- [BLOWS] BREATHE.
- [INHALES]
179
00:12:08,328 --> 00:12:10,230
- BREATHE OUT.
- [EXHALES]
180
00:12:10,330 --> 00:12:12,065
- BREATHE IN.
- [INHALES]
181
00:12:12,165 --> 00:12:14,701
- BREATHE OUT. OH!
- [EXHALES]
182
00:12:14,802 --> 00:12:16,436
OH, YOU KNOW
YOU CAN.
183
00:12:16,536 --> 00:12:19,239
JUST BREATHE THROUGH MY HAND.
YOU KNOW IT'S OKAY.
184
00:12:19,339 --> 00:12:21,274
- [GRUNTS]
- YOU CAN DO IT.
185
00:12:21,374 --> 00:12:25,178
- WHOA.
- [EXHALES]
186
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:27,480
- [GROANS]
- OH, RUSSELL.
187
00:12:27,580 --> 00:12:29,282
OH, HELP ME HELP YOU.
188
00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:32,119
GOOD, GOOD.
189
00:12:53,340 --> 00:12:56,109
[SPITS]
190
00:13:05,252 --> 00:13:07,955
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
191
00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:14,928
[WOMAN YELLING]
192
00:13:37,150 --> 00:13:40,053
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
I DON'T KNOW WHAT I JUST DID.
193
00:13:40,153 --> 00:13:42,289
[PANTS]
194
00:13:42,389 --> 00:13:46,894
- I'M ON THE STREETS WITH NO PANTS ON.
- [STATIC]
195
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:52,232
AND I CAN'T STOP SHAKING.
196
00:13:52,332 --> 00:13:54,902
HOW DO I CUT IT OFF?
197
00:14:03,944 --> 00:14:05,012
[RUSSELL]
MY EMOTIONS ARE...
198
00:14:08,415 --> 00:14:10,383
THEY'RE IN A BIT
OF A TURMOIL.
199
00:14:16,389 --> 00:14:18,291
[ABEL]
I JUST WENT THROUGH BLACKOUT
200
00:14:18,391 --> 00:14:22,229
AND...
I COME HOME...
201
00:14:23,396 --> 00:14:25,132
AND SEE THAT THERE ARE...
202
00:14:29,336 --> 00:14:31,338
THREE DOTS...
203
00:14:34,007 --> 00:14:36,376
ON MY NECK
FROM WHERE THEY--
204
00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:38,145
[STATIC CONTINUES]
205
00:14:47,354 --> 00:14:49,156
[PHONE RINGING]
206
00:14:50,423 --> 00:14:55,062
- [PHONE BEEPS]
- [MAN #9 SPEAKING]
207
00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:30,097
[TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING]
208
00:15:33,300 --> 00:15:35,368
[ABEL] I MEAN,
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT WAS
209
00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:40,140
BUT I THINK
I SURPRISED MYSELF
210
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:43,043
INTO REALIZING
HOW MUCH I LIKED IT.
211
00:15:47,247 --> 00:15:50,017
AND I REMEMBER
GETTING ON THE METRO
212
00:15:50,117 --> 00:15:54,321
AND BEING SO HYPERAWARE
213
00:15:54,421 --> 00:15:57,024
OF WHAT WAS GOING ON.
214
00:15:57,124 --> 00:15:59,059
ANY TIME ANYONE MOVED,
215
00:15:59,159 --> 00:16:02,095
ANY TIME SOMEONE GOT ONTO THE
TRAIN OR GOT OFF THE TRAIN.
216
00:16:07,334 --> 00:16:10,470
THE LINES OF THE REALITY
217
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:12,705
AND THE FICTION
WERE BLURRING.
218
00:16:17,044 --> 00:16:19,346
[MAN #10] IT'S A WEEK LATER.
THE EXPERIENCE--
219
00:16:19,446 --> 00:16:21,681
I MEAN, I'VE THOUGHT
OF VERY LITTLE ELSE
220
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:24,084
SINCE I'VE GONE
THROUGH IT.
221
00:16:24,184 --> 00:16:27,954
IT LEFT A HUGE IMPRESSION
ON ME.
222
00:16:28,055 --> 00:16:30,090
I KINDA WANNA GO BACK
223
00:16:30,190 --> 00:16:33,226
WHICH, YOU KNOW,
I'VE BEEN TRAUMATIZED
224
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,962
AND I KINDA WANNA GO BACK
TO MASTER IT,
225
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:38,131
TO DO IT AGAIN,
TO SEE WHAT I COULD DO BETTER.
226
00:16:42,802 --> 00:16:44,237
[RUSSELL]
AFTER I WENT THROUGH BLACKOUT
227
00:16:44,337 --> 00:16:46,306
I DID FIND
THAT THERE WAS
228
00:16:46,406 --> 00:16:48,741
A LEVEL OF ANXIETY
SOMETIMES
229
00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,277
AT NIGHT
230
00:16:50,377 --> 00:16:52,512
AND I DID HAVE
A FEW NIGHTMARES
231
00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:56,116
WHERE FRAGMENTS
OF THE EXPERIENCE
232
00:16:56,216 --> 00:16:57,284
WOULD COME BACK.
233
00:17:03,190 --> 00:17:05,525
IT'S ABOUT
4:00 AM IN THE MORNING.
234
00:17:09,462 --> 00:17:15,135
AND I JUST WOKE
FROM A VERY ODD DREAM
235
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,472
WHICH I KNOW
IS BLACKOUT-ORIENTED
236
00:17:19,572 --> 00:17:22,109
AND IT WAS
COMPLETELY DISORIENTING.
237
00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:27,013
[RUSSELL]
THAT THREAT OF VIOLENCE
238
00:17:27,114 --> 00:17:29,116
STAYED WITH ME FOR DAYS
239
00:17:29,182 --> 00:17:33,153
AND IT REALLY
TICKLED SOMETHING
240
00:17:33,253 --> 00:17:36,123
IN THE DEEP RECESSES
OF MY BRAIN.
241
00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:38,291
LIKE, "OKAY,
I'M PLAYING WITH FIRE,"
242
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:42,129
AND, SOMEHOW,
IT FELT REWARDING.
243
00:17:44,397 --> 00:17:46,466
I DID THINK
ABOUT IT A LOT
244
00:17:46,566 --> 00:17:48,034
AND THE FACT
THAT IT WAS SUCH
245
00:17:48,135 --> 00:17:50,036
A HEAVY EMOTIONAL RESPONSE
246
00:17:50,137 --> 00:17:54,607
AND I WANTED TO GO
BACK AND HAVE IT AGAIN.
247
00:18:14,294 --> 00:18:16,596
[YELLS]
248
00:18:38,451 --> 00:18:41,321
[RAPID YELLING]
249
00:18:42,589 --> 00:18:44,491
- OH!
- COME ON! COME ON!
250
00:18:44,591 --> 00:18:46,193
- OKAY.
- COME ON!
251
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:48,395
[GRUNTING, GROANING]
252
00:18:48,495 --> 00:18:50,463
[MAN]
THREE, TWO, ONE!
253
00:18:50,563 --> 00:18:52,265
RUN, RUN!
254
00:18:52,365 --> 00:18:53,866
RUN TO THE RIGHT!
TO THE RIGHT!
255
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:56,269
RUN! RUN!
RUN, GODDAMN IT!
256
00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:57,604
RUN TO THE DOOR,
YOU FUCKER!
257
00:18:57,704 --> 00:19:00,440
- GO, YOU PIECE OF SHIT! GO. RUN!
- WHAT?
258
00:19:00,540 --> 00:19:02,542
- RUN. RUN.
- [SCREAMS]
259
00:19:02,642 --> 00:19:04,211
ON THE GROUND!
ON YOUR BACK!
260
00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:06,112
ON THE GROUND.
ON YOUR BACK.
261
00:19:06,213 --> 00:19:08,415
UNDER THIS STAIR, BUSTER.
UNDER THIS FUCKING STAIR.
262
00:19:08,515 --> 00:19:10,550
WHAT DID YOU SAY TO US?
YOU SAID, "I WANNA BE A PART OF THIS.
263
00:19:10,650 --> 00:19:12,219
- THAT I WANT EVERYBODY TO KNOW--
- YES.
264
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:13,486
...THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH
BLACKOUT.
265
00:19:13,586 --> 00:19:15,322
THAT BLACKOUT
IS PART OF ME
266
00:19:15,422 --> 00:19:17,357
- AND I'M A PART OF BLACKOUT."
- [ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
267
00:19:17,457 --> 00:19:19,125
- OH, GOD!
- AND I'M PREPARED TO BE BRANDED!
268
00:19:19,226 --> 00:19:20,460
- OH, GOD!
- I'M PREPARED TO BE MARKED.
269
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,329
THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT!
THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT.
270
00:19:22,429 --> 00:19:24,464
- EVERYBODY'S GONNA KNOW.
- [SCREAMS]
271
00:19:24,564 --> 00:19:27,133
I AM PART OF YOU
AND YOU ARE PART OF US.
272
00:19:27,234 --> 00:19:29,536
FOREVER. IT'S DONE.
273
00:19:36,676 --> 00:19:39,246
I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE HELL
JUST HAPPENED.
274
00:19:39,346 --> 00:19:43,650
THEY TOOK THAT
TO AN EXTREME
275
00:19:43,750 --> 00:19:48,255
WHICH...
I, ACTUALLY...
276
00:19:48,321 --> 00:19:49,589
DON'T KNOW
IF I WAS PREPARED FOR.
277
00:19:54,794 --> 00:19:56,596
[SIGHS]
278
00:19:58,531 --> 00:20:00,367
SO, I'VE HAD ABOUT, UH,
279
00:20:00,467 --> 00:20:02,569
I THINK-- I THINK
IT'S BEEN ABOUT
280
00:20:02,669 --> 00:20:04,271
AN HOUR AND A HALF
281
00:20:04,371 --> 00:20:06,339
TO, UM--
282
00:20:06,439 --> 00:20:09,509
NO. YEAH. ABOUT THAT--
TO DECOMPRESS
283
00:20:09,609 --> 00:20:12,745
AND CALM DOWN A BIT.
284
00:20:12,845 --> 00:20:17,183
THEY ARE MASTERS
AT GETTING UNDER YOUR SKIN
285
00:20:17,284 --> 00:20:18,651
AND INTO YOUR HEAD
286
00:20:18,751 --> 00:20:22,255
AND PLAYING
WITH WHAT'S THERE.
287
00:20:22,355 --> 00:20:24,357
YOU KNOW, AND, OH,
BY THE WAY
288
00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:27,193
[LAUGHS] IF I-- I THINK
YOU CAN PROBABLY SEE
289
00:20:27,294 --> 00:20:30,297
THAT I-- THERE ARE THREE DOTS
ON MY HEAD.
290
00:20:30,397 --> 00:20:34,367
THAT WAS THE GIFT
FROM BLACKOUT.
291
00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:37,404
THEY ARE A PERMANENT MARKER.
[LAUGHS]
292
00:20:37,504 --> 00:20:41,641
THANK YOU, BLACKOUT.
THANK YOU.
293
00:21:04,497 --> 00:21:06,799
[PHONE RINGING]
294
00:21:08,401 --> 00:21:11,771
- [PHONE LINE BEEPS]
- [JOSH SPEAKING]
295
00:21:58,585 --> 00:22:01,821
[MAN #7] WHO ARE THE PEOPLE
WHO CREATED BLACKOUT?
296
00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:05,458
I THINK THE PEOPLE
WHO CREATED BLACKOUT
297
00:22:05,558 --> 00:22:07,827
HAVE GOT TO BE
SICK FUCKS.
298
00:22:07,927 --> 00:22:10,397
THEY MUST LOVE
TO TORTURE PEOPLE
299
00:22:10,430 --> 00:22:12,298
BUT THEY ALSO MUST LOVE
300
00:22:12,399 --> 00:22:15,868
TO SEE HOW PEOPLE REACT
TO CERTAIN SITUATIONS.
301
00:22:17,537 --> 00:22:19,606
THIS IS AN EXPLORATION
INTO FEAR,
302
00:22:19,706 --> 00:22:20,840
AN EXPLORATION
IN TERROR,
303
00:22:20,940 --> 00:22:22,809
AN EXPLORATION
INTO THE HUMAN PSYCHE.
304
00:22:22,909 --> 00:22:24,844
SO I THINK THEY ARE TRYING
TO DO SOMETHING
305
00:22:24,944 --> 00:22:28,415
EXPLORATIONAL--
SOMETHING ALMOST SCIENTIFIC.
306
00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:36,689
I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING
REALLY INTENSE
307
00:22:36,789 --> 00:22:38,758
ABOUT THIS CHAIR.
308
00:22:42,429 --> 00:22:43,796
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?
309
00:22:43,896 --> 00:22:47,333
AND THEN WHEN I GET READY
FOR THE STRANGULATION
310
00:22:47,434 --> 00:22:50,570
IT WAS SORT OF LIKE,
"OKAY.
311
00:22:50,670 --> 00:22:52,539
HERE WE GO."
312
00:22:54,674 --> 00:22:56,876
[MAN #6] I WOULD DEFINITELY
SAY THAT BLACKOUT
313
00:22:56,976 --> 00:23:00,447
IS A FORM
OF PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE.
314
00:23:03,850 --> 00:23:06,886
THEY WANNA DO THINGS
THAT MAKE YOU
315
00:23:06,986 --> 00:23:09,622
NOT FORGET ABOUT IT
FOR A VERY LONG TIME.
316
00:23:11,991 --> 00:23:16,829
THEY WANT YOU TO HAVE
A TRAUMATIC EXPERIENCE.
317
00:23:16,929 --> 00:23:18,898
SO, THEY HAVE TO BE
AT LEAST
318
00:23:18,998 --> 00:23:22,769
A LITTLE BIT SADISTIC
IN ORDER TO DO THIS.
319
00:23:27,006 --> 00:23:29,476
I THOUGHT YOU GUYS
WERE DONE FILMING.
320
00:23:34,814 --> 00:23:36,483
IS THIS GONNA KEEP GOING?
321
00:23:36,583 --> 00:23:38,818
- WE'RE DONE FOR THE DAY, GUYS.
- WE'RE DONE.
322
00:23:43,656 --> 00:23:46,959
WOMAN: SO, I JUST GOT ONE
OF MY E-MAILS FROM BLACKOUT.
323
00:23:49,061 --> 00:23:50,797
"UPON RECEIPT
OF THIS E-MAIL FILL OUT
324
00:23:50,897 --> 00:23:53,500
THE QUESTIONNAIRE BELOW
AND SEND IT BACK TODAY.
325
00:24:03,810 --> 00:24:05,978
"FULL NAME,
CURRENT MAILING ADDRESS,
326
00:24:06,078 --> 00:24:10,850
HEIGHT, WEIGHT,
BLOOD TYPE.
327
00:24:10,950 --> 00:24:13,620
WHAT RITUALS,
MENTAL AND/OR PHYSICAL
328
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:16,422
DO YOU PERFORM
ON A DAILY BASIS?
329
00:24:16,523 --> 00:24:18,958
DO YOU EXHIBIT
ANY SUPERSTITIOUS BEHAVIORS?
330
00:24:19,058 --> 00:24:21,160
DO YOU HAVE
OBSESSIVE THOUGHTS?"
331
00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:24,664
- OBSESSIVE THOUGHTS?
- I HAVE O.C.D.
332
00:24:24,764 --> 00:24:26,533
I HAVE
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE DISORDER.
333
00:24:26,633 --> 00:24:28,835
I'VE BEEN DIAGNOSED
OF HAVING
334
00:24:28,935 --> 00:24:30,603
OBSESSIVE-COMPULSIVE
DISORDER.
335
00:24:30,703 --> 00:24:32,905
[RUSSELL]
I DIVULGED TO BLACKOUT
336
00:24:33,005 --> 00:24:36,609
THAT I DO HAVE ISSUES
DEALING WITH FAILURE.
337
00:24:36,709 --> 00:24:39,812
A LOT OF THOUGHTS
ABOUT MY POWER
338
00:24:39,912 --> 00:24:42,749
AND CONTROL.
339
00:24:42,849 --> 00:24:43,883
I GOT MATH,
SCIENCE, READING.
340
00:24:43,983 --> 00:24:45,585
[REPEATS]
MATH, SCIENCE, READING.
341
00:24:45,685 --> 00:24:46,919
AND, THEN, AS I WOULD
FINISH A SUBJECT,
342
00:24:47,019 --> 00:24:48,921
MATH IS GONE.
343
00:24:49,021 --> 00:24:51,991
I'D GO SCIENCE, READING, SCIENCE,
READING, SCIENCE, READING.
344
00:24:52,091 --> 00:24:54,226
[WOMAN #2] WHAT I WANTED
BLACKOUT TO KNOW ABOUT MY PAST
345
00:24:54,326 --> 00:24:58,464
WAS, YOU KNOW,
THE-- MY HISTORY OF TRAUMAS
346
00:24:58,565 --> 00:25:00,867
AND PHYSICAL ABUSE,
SEXUAL ABUSE,
347
00:25:00,967 --> 00:25:03,670
HISTORY
OF AN EATING DISORDER.
348
00:25:03,770 --> 00:25:08,608
I HAD GONE THROUGH
A VERY LONG STRETCH
349
00:25:08,708 --> 00:25:10,677
OF NOT BEING ABLE
TO FIND WORK.
350
00:25:10,777 --> 00:25:13,479
I WAS EXTREMELY FEARFUL
BECAUSE OF THAT.
351
00:25:13,580 --> 00:25:14,981
BECAUSE I COULDN'T SEE
AN END.
352
00:25:15,081 --> 00:25:17,016
THE MOST DIFFICULT QUESTION
ON THAT QUESTIONNAIRE
353
00:25:17,116 --> 00:25:19,719
WAS, "WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
354
00:25:25,725 --> 00:25:27,994
[VOICES ECHOING]
355
00:25:36,769 --> 00:25:39,271
[FAINT CHATTER]
356
00:25:55,054 --> 00:25:57,624
AND I WAS THINKING ABOUT THE
MOVIE, "THE GAME"
357
00:25:57,724 --> 00:26:01,093
IN WHICH MICHAEL DOUGLAS'
WHOLE LIFE
358
00:26:01,193 --> 00:26:04,664
IS TAKEN OVER
359
00:26:04,764 --> 00:26:06,032
BY A CORPORATION
360
00:26:06,132 --> 00:26:07,700
AS AN ELABORATE
BIRTHDAY PRESENT.
361
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:10,637
BUT I WAS THINKING THAT,
PERHAPS, YOU GUYS
362
00:26:10,670 --> 00:26:11,838
AREN'T WHOM
YOU SEEM TO BE.
363
00:26:16,042 --> 00:26:17,677
I MEAN, I GREW UP
364
00:26:17,777 --> 00:26:21,848
IN A FAIRLY
CONSERVATIVE PLACE.
365
00:26:21,948 --> 00:26:25,551
AND I WAS ALWAYS
MUCH MORE INTERESTED
366
00:26:25,652 --> 00:26:28,821
IN THEATER AND BOOKS
367
00:26:28,921 --> 00:26:30,289
AND ART
368
00:26:30,389 --> 00:26:32,725
THAN I WAS
IN FOOTBALL
369
00:26:32,825 --> 00:26:36,295
WHICH MEANT THAT
I WAS GAY.
370
00:26:36,395 --> 00:26:38,665
AND YOU ARE, IN FACT,
PART OF BLACKOUT
371
00:26:38,698 --> 00:26:42,568
AND I HAVE REVEALED
ALL MY SECRETS TO BLACKOUT.
372
00:26:42,669 --> 00:26:44,704
AS A LITTLE BOY,
373
00:26:44,804 --> 00:26:47,707
WHEN YOU DON'T REALLY KNOW
YOUR SEXUALITY
374
00:26:47,807 --> 00:26:49,776
IT WAS...
375
00:26:49,876 --> 00:26:51,911
DEVASTATING...
376
00:26:52,011 --> 00:26:54,781
BECAUSE I JUST
WANTED TO BE LIKED
377
00:26:54,881 --> 00:26:56,849
AND I JUST WANTED
TO BE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.
378
00:26:58,985 --> 00:27:01,854
[SYNCHRONIZED CLICKING]
379
00:27:07,727 --> 00:27:10,763
MY GIRLFRIEND.
380
00:27:10,863 --> 00:27:13,032
[WOMAN'S VOICE] WHO WERE YOU
WITH LAST NIGHT? [MUMBLES]
381
00:27:13,132 --> 00:27:14,901
- MY GIRLFRIEND.
- WHO WERE YOU WITH LAST NIGHT?
382
00:27:15,001 --> 00:27:17,103
- WHO WERE YOU WITH LAST NIGHT?
- MY GIRLFRIEND.
383
00:27:17,203 --> 00:27:18,838
WHERE WERE YOU
LAST NIGHT?
384
00:27:18,938 --> 00:27:24,610
[REPEATING]
WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT?
385
00:27:24,711 --> 00:27:27,179
WHERE WERE YOU LAST NIGHT?
386
00:27:29,749 --> 00:27:31,851
[SCREAMING]
387
00:27:39,992 --> 00:27:42,094
EXPERIENCE THIS.
388
00:27:42,194 --> 00:27:45,732
PUT IT INSIDE!
PUT YOUR HAND INSIDE!
389
00:27:50,937 --> 00:27:53,172
"I ACCEPT THIS AS THE TEMPLE
OF MY WORSHIP."
390
00:27:53,272 --> 00:27:54,907
SAY IT.
391
00:27:55,007 --> 00:27:57,944
"I ACCEPT THIS
AS THE TEMPLE OF MY WORSHIP."
392
00:27:58,044 --> 00:27:59,645
SAY IT.
393
00:27:59,746 --> 00:28:01,180
"I ACCEPT THIS AS THE TEMPLE
OF MY WORSHIP."
394
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:02,915
- SAY IT.
- [TOGETHER] "I ACCEPT THIS
395
00:28:03,015 --> 00:28:04,416
AS THE TEMPLE
OF MY WORSHIP."
396
00:28:04,516 --> 00:28:06,218
"I ACCEPT THIS
AS THE TEMPLE OF MY WORSHIP."
397
00:28:06,318 --> 00:28:07,954
KEEP GOING,
"I ACCEPT THIS
398
00:28:08,054 --> 00:28:09,055
AS THE TEMPLE
OF MY WORSHIP."
399
00:28:09,155 --> 00:28:10,656
FUCKING SAY IT!
400
00:28:10,757 --> 00:28:11,924
[TOGETHER]
"I ACCEPT THIS AS THE TEMPLE
401
00:28:12,024 --> 00:28:14,927
- OF MY WORSHIP."
- AGAIN. HARDER.
402
00:28:15,027 --> 00:28:15,962
LOUDER.
403
00:28:16,062 --> 00:28:18,064
LOUDER. LOUDER!
SCREAM IT!
404
00:28:18,164 --> 00:28:20,166
[TOGETHER] "I ACCEPT THIS AS
THE TEMPLE OF MY WORSHIP."
405
00:28:20,266 --> 00:28:21,868
- "I ACCEPT THIS A THE TEMP--"
- [SCREAMS]
406
00:28:21,968 --> 00:28:24,036
[MAN]
GO, GO, GO, GO.
407
00:28:24,136 --> 00:28:26,906
- TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES AND PUT YOUR PANTS ON.
- TAKE OFF YOUR FUCKING SHOES!
408
00:28:27,006 --> 00:28:28,207
- PUT YOUR PANTS BACK ON.
- RIGHT NOW!
409
00:28:28,307 --> 00:28:29,942
TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES
AND PUT ON YOUR PANTS.
410
00:28:30,042 --> 00:28:31,010
TAKE 'EM OFF!
411
00:28:31,110 --> 00:28:32,078
- TAKE 'EM OFF!
- OKAY.
412
00:28:32,178 --> 00:28:33,813
- PUT YOUR PANTS ON.
- OKAY!
413
00:28:33,913 --> 00:28:35,414
COME ON, LET'S GO, YOU STUPID
PIECE OF SHIT!
414
00:28:35,514 --> 00:28:38,184
PUT YOUR PANTS ON!
FASTER! FASTER!
415
00:28:38,284 --> 00:28:41,053
LOOK AT ME.
LOOK AT ME!
416
00:29:09,048 --> 00:29:11,150
[ABEL] I-- I'M DONE. I-I-I AM.
417
00:29:11,250 --> 00:29:13,452
I'M-- THEY FUCK
WITH YOU AND THEN
418
00:29:13,552 --> 00:29:15,221
YOU'RE-- YOU'RE DONE.
419
00:29:17,089 --> 00:29:20,827
I-I'M NOT--
I GET IT.
420
00:29:20,860 --> 00:29:22,962
I GET IT.
421
00:29:28,300 --> 00:29:31,838
THAT'S IT.
I DID IT.
422
00:29:31,904 --> 00:29:33,539
ALL RIGHT.
423
00:29:40,046 --> 00:29:42,214
[RUSSELL] I-I THINK,
DEEP DOWN, WHAT I WANT
424
00:29:42,314 --> 00:29:44,283
IS I WANT SOMETHING
INTENSE ENOUGH
425
00:29:44,383 --> 00:29:46,986
THAT I WANT THEM
TO PUSH ME TO THE POINT
426
00:29:47,086 --> 00:29:49,088
WHERE I WANT OUT
427
00:29:49,188 --> 00:29:51,290
BUT THAT I CHOOSE
NOT TO.
428
00:29:51,390 --> 00:29:55,895
I-- THAT ALMOST SOUNDS LIKE
I WANNA OVERCOME SOMETHING.
429
00:30:00,132 --> 00:30:01,300
[SIGHS]
I LIKE DARK MATERIAL.
430
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:03,903
IT'S WHERE I GO
FIND PLEASURE.
431
00:30:04,003 --> 00:30:07,206
I FIND IT
A HEALTHY THING FOR ME.
432
00:30:07,306 --> 00:30:09,942
I DON'T THINK IT WOULD BE
HEALTHY FOR EVERYONE
433
00:30:10,042 --> 00:30:11,777
BUT I THINK
IT'S HEALTHY FOR ME.
434
00:30:11,878 --> 00:30:13,145
BECAUSE I KNOW
THAT THERE'S DARK STUFF
435
00:30:13,245 --> 00:30:14,180
IN MY PAST.
436
00:30:14,280 --> 00:30:16,115
I KNOW THERE'S, YOU KNOW,
437
00:30:16,215 --> 00:30:20,819
TRAUMAS THAT I HAVE LIVED
THROUGH EMOTIONALLY.
438
00:30:52,952 --> 00:30:55,121
[RUSSELL
BREATHING HEAVILY]
439
00:31:04,363 --> 00:31:06,198
[EXHALES]
440
00:31:07,934 --> 00:31:11,003
THE DARK STUFF, FOR ME?
441
00:31:12,171 --> 00:31:13,940
UM...
442
00:31:17,709 --> 00:31:20,412
THERE WAS SOME DARK--
443
00:31:20,512 --> 00:31:21,981
I KEEP GOING
TO THE WORD DARK--
444
00:31:22,081 --> 00:31:22,982
UH...
445
00:31:24,951 --> 00:31:26,618
THERE'S BEEN SOME
UNPLEASANT TIMES
446
00:31:26,718 --> 00:31:28,988
WHEN I WAS A CHILD AS--
GROWING UP.
447
00:31:29,088 --> 00:31:32,158
I GREW UP
IN THE SHADOW
448
00:31:32,258 --> 00:31:35,261
OF A REALLY
REBELLIOUS SIBLING
449
00:31:35,361 --> 00:31:39,131
AND THE WAY THAT I...
450
00:31:39,231 --> 00:31:41,267
DECIDED TO REACT TO THAT
451
00:31:41,367 --> 00:31:44,036
IS I WAS GONNA BE
THE GOOD KID.
452
00:31:44,136 --> 00:31:45,871
I WAS ALWAYS
THE GOOD STUDENT.
453
00:31:45,972 --> 00:31:48,074
I WAS ALWAYS THE ONE
WHO BROUGHT HOME THE "A'S."
454
00:31:48,174 --> 00:31:51,477
I WAS ALWAYS THE-- AND THAT WAS
MY WAY OF TRYING TO KEEP PEACE.
455
00:31:51,577 --> 00:31:55,214
SO, I'M SENSITIVE TO RULES,
ACTUALLY.
456
00:31:55,314 --> 00:31:57,183
I ALWAYS WANNA FOLLOW
THE RULES.
457
00:31:57,283 --> 00:31:59,385
IT'S BUILT INTO ME.
458
00:31:59,485 --> 00:32:02,088
I DON'T KNOW WHERE TO GO
ON FROM THERE.
459
00:32:05,591 --> 00:32:07,259
- [MAN] GET UP! GET UP!
- [RUSSELL SCREAMS]
460
00:32:07,359 --> 00:32:08,327
GET UP!
461
00:32:08,427 --> 00:32:09,395
STAND BEHIND
THE LIGHT BULB
462
00:32:09,495 --> 00:32:11,097
AND FACE ME!
463
00:32:16,335 --> 00:32:20,106
[MAN #2] TAKE OFF YOUR PANTS.
LEAVE 'EM ON THE FLOOR.
464
00:32:25,177 --> 00:32:27,046
FASTER!
465
00:32:27,146 --> 00:32:29,315
DON'T MAKE ME
WAIT FOR YOU!
466
00:32:29,415 --> 00:32:33,319
LET'S GO! LET'S GO!
LET'S GO! MOVE IT!
467
00:32:33,419 --> 00:32:35,487
FACE ME.
468
00:32:44,096 --> 00:32:46,065
- [GRUNTS]
- [SCREAMS]
469
00:32:46,165 --> 00:32:48,300
- NO! [GRUNTS]
- [DOOR OPENS]
470
00:32:48,400 --> 00:32:50,702
[MAN]
WALK. WALK.
471
00:32:50,802 --> 00:32:53,039
GET IN!
472
00:32:53,139 --> 00:32:55,341
TAKE OFF ALL YOUR CLOTHES NOW.
RIGHT NOW!
473
00:32:55,441 --> 00:32:58,044
- CLOTHES OFF NOW!
- [GRUNTING]
474
00:32:58,077 --> 00:33:01,080
ALL OF IT! GO!
YOU GOTTA GO FASTER.
475
00:33:01,180 --> 00:33:04,350
YOU ARE FUCKING UP.
GO! GO! ALL OF IT. NOW!
476
00:33:04,450 --> 00:33:06,585
- ALL OF IT, GODDAMN IT! ALL OF IT!
- [SCREAMING CONTINUES]
477
00:33:15,061 --> 00:33:17,196
AND IT WAS...
478
00:33:17,296 --> 00:33:18,530
IT WAS, UM...
479
00:33:24,070 --> 00:33:26,105
THERE WAS
A MOMENT WHERE
480
00:33:26,205 --> 00:33:27,439
I RECOGNIZED THE VOICE
481
00:33:27,539 --> 00:33:30,742
AND THE VOICE
JUST SAID, "BREATHE."
482
00:33:33,245 --> 00:33:37,249
BECAUSE THEY KNEW HOW
VULNERABLE I WAS FEELING.
483
00:33:39,251 --> 00:33:41,987
THAT WAS WHEN I REALIZED
THAT THERE WAS EXPLORATION
484
00:33:42,088 --> 00:33:46,292
THAT COULD BE DONE AND THAT WAS
A WAY I COULD LEARN ABOUT MYSELF.
485
00:33:50,129 --> 00:33:53,465
AT THAT MOMENT,
I FEEL
486
00:33:53,565 --> 00:33:55,201
THAT I BECAME PART
OF BLACKOUT
487
00:33:55,301 --> 00:33:57,436
AND BLACKOUT
BECAME PART OF ME.
488
00:34:21,527 --> 00:34:23,429
- [WOMAN] YOU CAN EAT SWEETS.
- [GIRL] I KNOW.
489
00:34:23,529 --> 00:34:27,166
I LIKE...
[MUMBLES].
490
00:34:27,266 --> 00:34:29,034
- THAT'S WHAT MOMMA WANTS.
- YOU LIKE THE MOVIE?
491
00:34:29,135 --> 00:34:31,270
I KINDA GOT A LITTLE BORED
HALFWAY THROUGH.
492
00:34:31,370 --> 00:34:32,504
- LITTLE BIT.
- I DIDN'T.
493
00:34:32,604 --> 00:34:35,307
- YEAH. LEXI LOVED IT.
- YEAH.
494
00:34:35,407 --> 00:34:37,042
[MAN #11]
MY WIFE IS A THERAPIST
495
00:34:37,143 --> 00:34:40,479
AND SHE IS A THERAPIST
THAT DEALS WITH ADDICTION.
496
00:34:40,579 --> 00:34:42,581
STEPHANIE,
AS AN ADDICTION THERAPIST
497
00:34:42,681 --> 00:34:46,352
SEES A POTENTIAL PROBLEM
WITH ME AND BLACKOUT.
498
00:34:48,920 --> 00:34:52,424
AND STEPHANIE WOULD SAY,
"YOU CAN DRINK ALCOHOL, FINE.
499
00:34:52,524 --> 00:34:54,393
YOU CAN HAVE SEX
WITH PEOPLE, FINE.
500
00:34:54,493 --> 00:34:56,562
AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T HAVE
NEGATIVE CONSEQUENCES.
501
00:34:56,662 --> 00:34:58,164
AS LONG AS
IT DOESN'T ESCALATE."
502
00:34:58,197 --> 00:35:00,199
SHE SEES
MY FASCINATION
503
00:35:00,299 --> 00:35:02,301
WITH BLACKOUT
AS ESCALATING.
504
00:35:05,237 --> 00:35:06,605
- [WOMAN] "I, BOB...
- [BOB] "I, BOB..."
505
00:35:06,705 --> 00:35:09,175
[WOMAN] "...AM HERE
OF MY OWN VOLITION."
506
00:35:09,241 --> 00:35:11,510
"I, BOB, AM HERE
OF MY OWN VOLITION."
507
00:35:11,610 --> 00:35:13,479
- LOUDER.
- [BOB] "I, BOB, AM HERE OF MY OWN VOLITION."
508
00:35:13,579 --> 00:35:15,847
"I WANT TO BE A PART
OF THIS EXPERIENCE.
509
00:35:15,947 --> 00:35:17,616
"I WANT TO BE A PART
OF THIS EXPERIENCE.
510
00:35:17,716 --> 00:35:20,319
"AND TO HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE
BECOME A PART OF ME."
511
00:35:20,419 --> 00:35:23,822
"AND TO HAVE THIS EXPERIENCE
BECOME A PART OF ME."
512
00:35:23,922 --> 00:35:26,192
[BOB] WHEN I TALK
TO PEOPLE ABOUT IT,
513
00:35:26,225 --> 00:35:28,627
I GET THIS EXCITEMENT
IN MY VOICE
514
00:35:28,727 --> 00:35:31,096
AND IN MY EYES
AND SHE HATES THAT.
515
00:35:31,197 --> 00:35:32,631
"IS THIS A FETISH?
WHAT IS THIS?
516
00:35:32,731 --> 00:35:35,634
WHY ARE YOU
INTERESTED IN THIS?"
517
00:35:35,734 --> 00:35:37,369
SHE'S CONCERNED
518
00:35:37,469 --> 00:35:40,105
THAT IT'S BECOMING
AN ADDICTION.
519
00:35:40,206 --> 00:35:42,208
[WOMAN]
"I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU."
520
00:35:42,274 --> 00:35:44,876
- [BOB] "I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU."
- "I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU."
521
00:35:44,976 --> 00:35:49,248
[BOTH REPEATING]
"I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU."
522
00:35:58,457 --> 00:36:00,326
[PHONE RINGING]
523
00:36:01,493 --> 00:36:03,229
- [SIGHS]
- [PHONE LINE BEEPS]
524
00:36:03,262 --> 00:36:05,631
[JOSH]
HEY, IT'S JOSH AGAIN.
525
00:36:05,731 --> 00:36:09,535
SO, KRIS AND I JUST WANTED
TO CHECK IN.
526
00:36:39,298 --> 00:36:41,633
[RUSSELL] SO,
I DROVE HOME THIS MORNING
527
00:36:41,733 --> 00:36:47,172
AS QUICKLY AS I COULD
TO WALK IN AND FIND THIS.
528
00:36:47,273 --> 00:36:51,743
WHICH IS MY INVITE,
APPARENTLY
529
00:36:51,843 --> 00:36:56,282
TO THE 2014 OFFSEASON
FOR BLACKOUT.
530
00:36:56,315 --> 00:36:58,350
I-I DON'T KNOW
IF I'M COHERENT ENOUGH
531
00:36:58,450 --> 00:37:02,721
TO DO THIS, BUT...
532
00:37:02,821 --> 00:37:04,590
MY ADVENTURE
WITH BLACKOUT CONTINUES,
533
00:37:04,690 --> 00:37:05,857
I GUESS.
534
00:37:08,427 --> 00:37:10,462
I JUST GOTTA FIGURE OUT A WAY
TO GET TO NEW YORK NOW.
535
00:37:10,562 --> 00:37:11,797
UM...
536
00:37:14,766 --> 00:37:16,468
YEAH, THIS IS,
THIS IS, THIS IS
537
00:37:16,568 --> 00:37:17,969
WHAT THIS HAS BEEN
GROWING TOWARD
538
00:37:18,069 --> 00:37:21,740
IS-IS JUST
AN ONGOING...
539
00:37:25,577 --> 00:37:29,014
CHALLENGING...
[SIGHS]
540
00:38:10,356 --> 00:38:12,023
I WANTED TO EXPERIENCE
A NEW YORK BLACKOUT
541
00:38:12,123 --> 00:38:14,360
BECAUSE I KEPT
GETTING THE SENSE
542
00:38:14,426 --> 00:38:17,396
THAT NEW YORK
WAS A MORE INTENSE EXPERIENCE
543
00:38:17,496 --> 00:38:20,966
I'M ALSO ANXIOUS
TO SEE WHAT TESTS ME
544
00:38:21,066 --> 00:38:22,634
AND IF THEY ARE
GOING TO DO SOMETHING
545
00:38:22,734 --> 00:38:25,704
THAT REALLY TESTS ME.
546
00:38:27,639 --> 00:38:30,509
I DON'T WANT
TO LIVE MY LIFE
547
00:38:30,609 --> 00:38:33,712
DENYING
THAT THERE'S DARKNESS.
548
00:38:35,447 --> 00:38:37,048
I HAVEN'T YET FOUND
549
00:38:37,148 --> 00:38:39,651
THE DOOR THAT DISTURBS ME
THE MOST
550
00:38:41,520 --> 00:38:45,391
AND IF I DO SOMEDAY,
I MAY REGRET IT.
551
00:38:45,424 --> 00:38:47,459
I KNOW THAT.
552
00:39:01,407 --> 00:39:02,708
[DRILL WHIRRING]
553
00:39:05,577 --> 00:39:06,745
SHOULD WE CHANGE IT
FOR RUSSELL?
554
00:39:08,614 --> 00:39:10,616
YES, I THINK
WE HAVE TO CHANGE IT FOR HIM.
555
00:39:10,716 --> 00:39:12,418
HOW?
556
00:39:15,687 --> 00:39:17,088
I THINK THE PEOPLE
LOOKING AT HIM
557
00:39:17,188 --> 00:39:19,725
IS GOING TO BE
HORRIFYINGLY CREEPY.
558
00:39:19,825 --> 00:39:21,727
THE FACT IS,
EVERYBODY'S WATCHING HIM.
559
00:39:21,827 --> 00:39:26,698
HE'S FAILED EVERYBODY.
NOT JUST US.
560
00:39:26,798 --> 00:39:30,101
THAT'S AS PERSONAL
AS YOU CAN GET FOR HIM.
561
00:39:30,201 --> 00:39:33,038
AS I SAY IT,
IT FEELS ALMOST TOO MEAN.
562
00:39:33,138 --> 00:39:34,573
[STAPLING]
563
00:39:43,749 --> 00:39:45,517
[RUSSELL]
SO, THAT NIGHT,
564
00:39:45,617 --> 00:39:47,719
I STARTED NOTICING
565
00:39:47,819 --> 00:39:50,456
SOME PEOPLE
FROM NEW YORK
566
00:39:50,556 --> 00:39:53,659
SORT OF CREEPING
AROUND MY FACEBOOK PAGE.
567
00:39:57,729 --> 00:39:59,898
AND WHAT I REALIZED
IS THESE WERE ALL PEOPLE
568
00:39:59,998 --> 00:40:03,502
WHO FORMED A BIT
OF A MYSTERIOUS GROUP
569
00:40:03,602 --> 00:40:05,437
THAT SEEMS TO BE
BY INVITATION ONLY
570
00:40:05,537 --> 00:40:07,506
CALLED THE SURVIVORS.
571
00:40:07,606 --> 00:40:10,576
[SCRATCHING ON PAPER]
572
00:40:14,245 --> 00:40:16,748
[WOMAN] THERE IS,
ACTUALLY, A VERY SECRET
573
00:40:16,848 --> 00:40:19,451
BLACKOUT SURVIVORS GROUP
THAT EXISTS
574
00:40:19,551 --> 00:40:21,386
THAT ONLY ABOUT
TWO DOZEN PEOPLE
575
00:40:21,487 --> 00:40:24,389
ARE A PART OF.
576
00:40:24,490 --> 00:40:28,594
AND THEY ARE--
WE ARE
577
00:40:28,694 --> 00:40:31,897
VERY SELECTIVE
ABOUT WHO WE LET IN.
578
00:40:39,838 --> 00:40:42,641
MY NAME IS JOHN
AND I AM A SURVIVOR.
579
00:40:46,077 --> 00:40:48,814
I WOULD SAY BLACKOUT
IS TESTING ME
580
00:40:48,914 --> 00:40:52,551
TO SEE WHAT
I AM CAPABLE OF.
581
00:40:52,651 --> 00:40:53,819
IT'S KIND OF SHOWN ME THAT
582
00:40:53,919 --> 00:40:56,454
I DON'T HAVE TO BE
SO TIMID,
583
00:40:56,555 --> 00:40:58,456
SO VERY CLOSED OFF.
584
00:40:58,557 --> 00:41:01,426
I CAN BE MORE OPEN TO LETTING
THE UNKNOWN HAPPEN.
585
00:41:01,527 --> 00:41:03,895
BLACKOUT HAS THE ABILITY
TO CHANGE YOU
586
00:41:03,995 --> 00:41:06,598
IF YOU'RE WILLING
TO LET IT.
587
00:41:10,536 --> 00:41:13,872
I HIGHLY BELIEVE THAT BLACKOUT
HAS ACTUALLY TRANSFORMED ME.
588
00:41:17,543 --> 00:41:19,978
THERE'S A PART OF ME
THAT ALWAYS WANTS
589
00:41:20,078 --> 00:41:22,848
THEM TO ALMOST
GO INSIDE MY BRAIN
590
00:41:22,948 --> 00:41:25,651
AND HAVE THEM PUSH
TO THOSE LIMITS
591
00:41:25,751 --> 00:41:27,052
LIKE, AND GO PAST THEM.
592
00:41:31,557 --> 00:41:33,224
[MAN] TO BE ABLE TO
EXPERIENCE BLACKOUT
593
00:41:33,324 --> 00:41:34,626
YOU HAVE TO HAVE
A DEEPER KNOWLEDGE
594
00:41:34,726 --> 00:41:35,927
OF YOURSELF
595
00:41:36,027 --> 00:41:37,696
OR IF YOU DON'T
HAVE THAT DEEPER KNOWLEDGE
596
00:41:37,796 --> 00:41:39,865
OF YOURSELF,
TO GO THROUGH BLACKOUT
597
00:41:39,965 --> 00:41:43,635
WILL ALLOW YOU TO GAIN
THAT DEEPER KNOWLEDGE.
598
00:41:47,338 --> 00:41:49,575
SO, I'M ONLY A COUPLE MINUTES
AWAY FROM MEETING
599
00:41:49,675 --> 00:41:51,943
THE NEW YORK PEOPLE.
600
00:41:52,043 --> 00:41:54,479
SO, I'M JUST WALKING AROUND
A PARK
601
00:41:54,580 --> 00:41:56,582
WAITING
FOR THE RIGHT TIME.
602
00:41:56,615 --> 00:41:58,917
IT SEEMS A LITTLE ODD
THAT I WAS GIVEN
603
00:41:59,017 --> 00:42:00,986
AN ADDRESS AND A TIME
AND TOLD TO SHOW UP--
604
00:42:01,086 --> 00:42:04,590
VERY, VERY BLACKOUT.
605
00:42:04,623 --> 00:42:07,593
I WAS REALLY EXCITED
BECAUSE I HAD GONE FOUR TIMES
606
00:42:07,626 --> 00:42:09,628
AND NOBODY ELSE,
607
00:42:09,728 --> 00:42:11,697
NONE OF MY FRIENDS
WHO WENT ONCE
608
00:42:11,797 --> 00:42:14,766
HAD THE REACTION I DID,
SO I WAS DOUBTING MYSELF.
609
00:42:14,866 --> 00:42:19,504
LIKE, WHAT IS IT ABOUT ME?
WHY AM I WEIRD?
610
00:42:19,605 --> 00:42:22,608
YOU HAVE THESE CONVERSATIONS
WITH OTHER PEOPLE
611
00:42:22,641 --> 00:42:25,611
AND THE JUDGMENT
BECOMES AGAINST YOU.
612
00:42:25,677 --> 00:42:29,014
WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?
613
00:42:29,114 --> 00:42:31,983
YOU KNOW, IT'S LIKE YOU KNOW THE OLD
TOD BROWNING'S "FREAKS" REFERENCE,
614
00:42:32,083 --> 00:42:33,785
"ONE OF US."
615
00:42:33,885 --> 00:42:36,855
THAT'S-- THAT'S WHAT
I WAS HOPING TO FIND.
616
00:42:36,955 --> 00:42:38,790
- AH!
- [WOMAN] HI!
617
00:42:38,890 --> 00:42:40,525
- [LAUGHS]
- HE BRINGS GIFTS.
618
00:42:40,626 --> 00:42:43,695
YES, I DO. I DO, ACTUALLY.
WOW.
619
00:42:43,795 --> 00:42:46,798
- AS LONG AS IT'S GOODIES.
- YOU PEOPLE, IN PERSON.
620
00:42:46,898 --> 00:42:50,068
- UH, UM--
- HELLO, INTERNET STRANGER.
621
00:42:50,168 --> 00:42:52,704
- [SIGHS]
- HI. HOW ARE YOU?
622
00:42:52,804 --> 00:42:55,040
- I'M FINE. NATALIA, RIGHT?
- YES.
623
00:42:55,140 --> 00:42:56,675
- GLADYS.
- YUP.
624
00:42:56,775 --> 00:42:59,544
[SIGHS]
NICE TO MEET YOU.
625
00:42:59,645 --> 00:43:00,912
UM-- [LAUGHS]
626
00:43:01,012 --> 00:43:02,080
I HAVE A TRADITION.
627
00:43:02,180 --> 00:43:03,548
I HAVE FRIENDS
THAT I TRY TO MEET
628
00:43:03,649 --> 00:43:04,850
IN NEW YORK ABOUT
EVERY YEAR
629
00:43:04,950 --> 00:43:06,051
OR EVERY YEAR
AND A HALF OR SO,
630
00:43:06,151 --> 00:43:07,786
IT'S LIKE,
LIFELONG FRIENDS,
631
00:43:07,886 --> 00:43:10,822
25-YEAR-OLD RELATIONSHIPS
AND THINGS LIKE THAT.
632
00:43:10,922 --> 00:43:12,724
WE HAVE A TRADITION
IN NEW YORK
633
00:43:12,824 --> 00:43:14,926
AND IT'S WHENEVER WE'RE IN
NEW YORK AT THE SAME TIME
634
00:43:15,026 --> 00:43:16,895
WE HAVE TO SHARE
CHAMPAGNE TRUFFLES.
635
00:43:16,995 --> 00:43:18,830
- OH-HO! COOL.
- THAT'S AN AWESOME THING TO SHARE.
636
00:43:18,930 --> 00:43:20,298
[ALL LAUGH]
637
00:43:20,398 --> 00:43:21,967
I, LITERALLY,
I JUST FOUND MYSELF
638
00:43:22,067 --> 00:43:23,669
OUT OF HABIT
BECAUSE I THOUGHT
639
00:43:23,735 --> 00:43:25,570
I WAS MAKING FRIENDS
IN NEW YORK.
640
00:43:25,671 --> 00:43:27,673
- HERE ARE CHAMPAGNE TRUFFLES.
- I CAN TOTALLY GET DOWN
641
00:43:27,773 --> 00:43:30,876
- WITH THIS TRADITION.
- [LAUGHTER]
642
00:43:30,976 --> 00:43:33,111
- TO CHAMPAGNE TRUFFLES.
- CHAMPAGNE TRUFFLES.
643
00:43:33,211 --> 00:43:35,046
TO BLACKOUT.
TO YOU GUYS.
644
00:43:35,146 --> 00:43:38,016
- YEAH!
- TO FRIENDS.
645
00:43:38,116 --> 00:43:40,786
[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
646
00:43:55,233 --> 00:43:57,869
[STATIC]
647
00:44:09,180 --> 00:44:11,783
[ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
648
00:44:11,883 --> 00:44:15,887
[MUFFLED SPEAKING] I, RUSSELL,
AM HERE OF MY OWN VOLITION.
649
00:44:15,987 --> 00:44:18,724
I AM PREPARED
TO BE MARKED.
650
00:44:18,824 --> 00:44:21,760
I AM READY TO BE BRANDED.
[SCREAMS]
651
00:44:22,961 --> 00:44:25,897
I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU.
652
00:44:25,997 --> 00:44:31,436
- [WOMAN] SCREAM IT!
- I GIVE MYSELF TO YOU!
653
00:44:40,211 --> 00:44:41,947
[CRYING]
654
00:44:43,281 --> 00:44:46,184
WHY DO YOU MAKE ME
DO THAT, RUSSELL?
655
00:44:46,284 --> 00:44:49,154
- [GROANS]
- WHY DO YOU MAKE ME DO THAT?
656
00:44:49,254 --> 00:44:52,791
- NO.
- [CRYING CONTINUES]
657
00:44:54,826 --> 00:44:56,661
WRITE ON ME, RUSSELL.
658
00:44:56,762 --> 00:45:00,932
MARK ME.
MARK ME!
659
00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:02,768
- [ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
- [GASPS]
660
00:45:02,834 --> 00:45:04,836
MARK ME!
661
00:45:06,972 --> 00:45:09,107
ALL RIGHT.
662
00:45:12,911 --> 00:45:15,413
YOU'RE GONNA FUCKIN' DO IT!
SHUT UP!
663
00:45:15,513 --> 00:45:18,850
- [SOBBING]
- DO WHAT I SAY. NOW, FUCKING DO IT.
664
00:45:21,086 --> 00:45:24,689
PICK UP THE GUN.
PICK UP THE GUN!
665
00:45:24,790 --> 00:45:28,093
- SHUT UP! SHUT UP!
- [SOBBING CONTINUES]
666
00:45:28,193 --> 00:45:30,161
- SHUT UP!
- [BUZZING CONTINUES]
667
00:45:30,261 --> 00:45:32,964
- [GUN CLICKING]
- PULL THE TRIGGER.
668
00:45:33,064 --> 00:45:36,968
POINT IT AT HER FOREHEAD
AND PULL THE TRIGGER.
669
00:45:37,068 --> 00:45:39,704
COME ON, RUSSELL.
PULL THE FUCKING TRIGGER.
670
00:45:39,805 --> 00:45:41,006
STOP FUCKING UP!
671
00:45:41,106 --> 00:45:43,809
POINT IT AT HER HEAD
AND PULL THE TRIGGER.
672
00:45:43,909 --> 00:45:46,845
DO WHAT I SAY.
NOW, FUCKING DO IT.
673
00:45:46,945 --> 00:45:48,713
- DO IT!
- NO!
674
00:45:48,814 --> 00:45:50,949
STOP FUCKING UP.
FUCKING PULL THE TRIGGER.
675
00:45:51,049 --> 00:45:53,018
DO IT NOW, RUSSELL.
DON'T FUCKING LET US DOWN.
676
00:45:53,118 --> 00:45:54,485
JUST FUCKING
PULL THE TRIGGER!
677
00:45:54,585 --> 00:45:59,057
[SCREAMS, CRIES]
678
00:46:00,992 --> 00:46:02,828
[SOBBING]
679
00:46:04,963 --> 00:46:06,965
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- [GROANS]
680
00:46:07,065 --> 00:46:08,834
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
681
00:46:25,984 --> 00:46:28,854
[BREATHING CONTINUES]
682
00:46:53,411 --> 00:46:55,246
[EXHALES]
683
00:47:22,340 --> 00:47:24,910
[ABEL] YOU CAN NEVER GO
BACK TO THE FIRST TIME
684
00:47:24,943 --> 00:47:27,112
WHEN I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT
I WAS GETTING INTO.
685
00:47:27,212 --> 00:47:30,081
WHEN I HAD NO IDEA
WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO ME
686
00:47:30,181 --> 00:47:33,318
ONCE I CROSSED
INTO THEIR WORLD.
687
00:47:33,418 --> 00:47:36,221
BUT AFTER I STARTED
GOING A FEW TIMES
688
00:47:36,321 --> 00:47:39,925
IT FELT LIKE...
689
00:47:40,025 --> 00:47:44,095
S&M AND IT FELT
LIKE ABUSE.
690
00:47:44,195 --> 00:47:47,165
I WAS SLAPPED
ACROSS THE FACE
691
00:47:47,265 --> 00:47:49,367
GROSS SHIT SHOVED
INTO MY MOUTH
692
00:47:49,467 --> 00:47:51,369
AND HELD
MY THROAT BACK
693
00:47:51,469 --> 00:47:54,339
SO I WAS BEING PUT IN
SITUATIONS WHERE I WAS CHOKING.
694
00:47:54,439 --> 00:47:57,575
THIS ISN'T A HAUNT,
THIS IS ABUSE
695
00:47:57,675 --> 00:48:00,611
AND I THINK
THERE ARE SOME PEOPLE
696
00:48:00,711 --> 00:48:04,849
SOME FANS OF BLACKOUT
WHO ARE HERE...
697
00:48:04,950 --> 00:48:07,285
BECAUSE THEY DON'T
WANNA WALK AWAY FROM IT
698
00:48:07,385 --> 00:48:09,120
'CAUSE THEY WANNA BE HURT
A LITTLE BIT.
699
00:48:17,996 --> 00:48:19,564
[RUSSELL]
I'M BACK IN LOS ANGELES.
700
00:48:19,664 --> 00:48:22,968
IT'S BEEN A FEW DAYS NOW.
701
00:48:23,034 --> 00:48:26,404
I MUST SAY, THAT THAT
ENDING WHERE YOU'RE-- YOU'RE
702
00:48:26,504 --> 00:48:29,007
ASKED TO BE WITNESS TO
703
00:48:29,107 --> 00:48:31,142
AND A PARTICIPANT
IN VIOLENCE
704
00:48:31,242 --> 00:48:34,379
WAS VERY, VERY...
705
00:48:34,479 --> 00:48:35,981
[SIGHS]
706
00:48:36,081 --> 00:48:39,150
DEEPLY UGLY
IN MANY WAYS.
707
00:48:42,387 --> 00:48:47,092
ENCOURAGING ME
TO TAKE SOMEONE'S LIFE.
708
00:48:47,192 --> 00:48:48,994
[SCREAMS]
709
00:48:50,461 --> 00:48:52,330
MAKES ME REALLY...
710
00:48:52,430 --> 00:48:55,000
[SIGHS]
SAD.
711
00:48:56,367 --> 00:48:59,037
AND I WALKED OUT...
712
00:48:59,137 --> 00:49:03,208
IN A HORRIBLE,
HORRIBLE MENTAL STATE.
713
00:49:03,308 --> 00:49:06,411
SO, THAT--
THAT LED TO MISTRUST
714
00:49:06,511 --> 00:49:08,613
WITH BLACKOUT.
715
00:49:11,549 --> 00:49:13,184
BECAUSE TRUST
IS THE ONE THING
716
00:49:13,284 --> 00:49:16,354
I HAD NEVER QUESTIONED
WITH BLACKOUT
717
00:49:16,454 --> 00:49:18,089
AND THEY HAD
PUT ME IN A POSITION
718
00:49:18,189 --> 00:49:20,125
WHERE I NOW DOUBTED THEM
AND QUESTIONED THEIR TRUST.
719
00:49:57,262 --> 00:50:00,065
[BOB] I FELT
VERY PARANOID BECAUSE
720
00:50:00,131 --> 00:50:04,102
I DID FIND A WORD-- THE
WORD ABANDON IN MY PHONE
721
00:50:04,202 --> 00:50:05,236
WHICH MADE ME THINK,
"HUH.
722
00:50:05,336 --> 00:50:07,205
HOW DID THAT
GET IN MY PHONE?"
723
00:50:07,305 --> 00:50:11,742
DID BLACKOUT PUT IT THERE?
DID MY WIFE PUT IT THERE?
724
00:50:17,648 --> 00:50:21,252
[WOMAN #2] I WAS CONVINCED THEY
WERE BREAKING INTO MY HOUSE.
725
00:50:23,154 --> 00:50:25,256
I LOOK AROUND MY HOUSE,
AND, I SWEAR,
726
00:50:25,356 --> 00:50:26,524
I HAD NOT SEEN IT
THE DAY BEFORE.
727
00:50:26,624 --> 00:50:28,093
AND, YOU KNOW, I REALIZED
728
00:50:28,193 --> 00:50:30,061
I WAS PROBABLY
JUST BEING PARANOID.
729
00:50:32,530 --> 00:50:34,265
[BOB]
AND I STARTED WONDERING
730
00:50:34,365 --> 00:50:37,135
IF PEOPLE WERE
LOOKING AT MY E-MAILS
731
00:50:37,235 --> 00:50:40,571
IF PEOPLE WERE LISTENING
TO MY CONVERSATIONS.
732
00:50:42,507 --> 00:50:46,277
IF PEOPLE
WERE WATCHING ME.
733
00:51:13,371 --> 00:51:16,241
[MUFFLED YELLING]
734
00:51:24,682 --> 00:51:28,153
[JOHN] WE ARE SEEING
IF WE COULD BRANCH OUT
735
00:51:28,186 --> 00:51:30,588
AND MAKE
AN L.A. SURVIVOR'S GROUP,
736
00:51:30,688 --> 00:51:32,490
AND I THINK
THEY'RE WANTING
737
00:51:32,590 --> 00:51:34,625
TO HAVE RUSSELL
SPEARHEAD THAT.
738
00:51:39,230 --> 00:51:41,199
[WOMAN] THIS LITERALLY
CAME FROM BLACKOUT.
739
00:51:43,368 --> 00:51:45,470
THEY THINK RUSSELL
WOULD BE A GOOD PERSON
740
00:51:45,570 --> 00:51:50,208
TO HEAD AN L.A. VERSION
OF THE CLUB.
741
00:51:50,308 --> 00:51:53,211
BLACKOUT SUGGESTING RUSSELL
TO LEAD THE L.A. GROUP
742
00:51:53,311 --> 00:51:55,346
WAS LITERALLY
FROM THE MOUTH OF GOD.
743
00:51:55,446 --> 00:51:57,081
THE RULES COME FROM THEM.
744
00:51:57,182 --> 00:51:59,350
THEY'RE OUR TEACHER,
745
00:51:59,450 --> 00:52:01,652
THE NUN THAT YOU HAVE
TO FOLLOW THE RULES,
746
00:52:01,752 --> 00:52:05,423
AND SO, JUST, I'M SURE
IT CAN SEEM LIKE WE'RE A CULT
747
00:52:05,523 --> 00:52:08,092
BUT BLACKOUT HAS NOTHING
TO DO WITH OUR GROUP.
748
00:52:08,193 --> 00:52:11,629
IT'S NOT CONTROLLED BY THEM
OR RUN BY THEM IN ANY WAY,
749
00:52:11,729 --> 00:52:16,201
BUT WE DO TAKE
THEIR SUGGESTIONS AND FEEDBACK
750
00:52:16,301 --> 00:52:18,336
REALLY STRONGLY
751
00:52:18,436 --> 00:52:21,206
AND SO, IF THEY SAY SOMETHING,
WE LISTEN.
752
00:52:34,752 --> 00:52:39,257
- WHAT'S UP, MAN?
- HEY! HOW ARE YOU, MAN? COME HERE.
753
00:52:40,391 --> 00:52:42,260
- HEY!
- HEY! HOW ARE YOU?
754
00:52:42,360 --> 00:52:45,296
- GREAT! HOW ARE YOU?
- COME ON IN. NICE TO SEE YOU.
755
00:52:45,396 --> 00:52:47,698
SO, I'M IN THERE
STANDING AND IT'S PITCH BLACK
756
00:52:47,798 --> 00:52:50,235
AND I'M THINKING,
"OH, MY GOD, HE JUST LEFT ME
757
00:52:50,268 --> 00:52:52,603
IN THIS ABANDONED PART
OF THIS BUILDING."
758
00:52:52,703 --> 00:52:54,605
I'M FREAKING OUT BECAUSE
759
00:52:54,705 --> 00:52:56,441
I THINK THAT'S ONE
OF MY FEARS
760
00:52:56,541 --> 00:53:00,311
IS BEING ALONE
IN SOME PLACE THAT'S ABANDONED.
761
00:53:00,411 --> 00:53:03,381
AND-- HE JUST GOT
RIGHT ON MY FEAR.
762
00:53:03,481 --> 00:53:05,416
FOR SOME REASON, I WAS JUST,
LIKE, SUPER EMOTIONAL.
763
00:53:05,516 --> 00:53:06,684
I DON'T KNOW WHY.
764
00:53:06,784 --> 00:53:09,420
IT JUST, LIKE,
I WAS SITTING ON THE BENCH
765
00:53:09,520 --> 00:53:13,157
AND I WAS, LIKE, "I THINK
I'M GONNA START CRYING."
766
00:53:13,258 --> 00:53:14,292
YUP.
767
00:53:14,392 --> 00:53:17,462
- HELLO.
- HOW'S IT GOING, MAN?
768
00:53:17,562 --> 00:53:18,896
- HI. HOW'S IT GOING?
- GOOD TO SEE YA.
769
00:53:18,996 --> 00:53:20,698
- HI, HOW ARE YOU, GUYS?
- GOOD TO SEE YOU.
770
00:53:20,798 --> 00:53:22,300
NICE TO SEE YOU.
771
00:53:22,400 --> 00:53:23,568
[BOB] THE BLACKOUT
SURVIVORS GROUP
772
00:53:23,668 --> 00:53:25,270
IS A SECRET GROUP.
773
00:53:25,370 --> 00:53:27,438
WE ARE PEOPLE WHO ARE OBSESSED
WITH BLACKOUT
774
00:53:27,538 --> 00:53:29,340
AND WHO LIKE TO TALK ABOUT IT
AND THINK ABOUT IT.
775
00:53:29,440 --> 00:53:31,309
AND WHEN I'M WITH
THE SURVIVOR'S GROUP
776
00:53:31,409 --> 00:53:33,578
I FEEL UNDERSTOOD.
777
00:53:33,678 --> 00:53:36,547
HOW DOES THIS
AFFECT YOU GUYS?
778
00:53:36,647 --> 00:53:39,584
I CAN HONESTLY SAY
THAT IT-IT'S
779
00:53:39,684 --> 00:53:43,187
BEEN THIS ALMOST
TRANSFORMATIONAL THING FOR ME
780
00:53:43,288 --> 00:53:46,424
AND I GET THE IMPRESSION,
TO SOME DEGREE,
781
00:53:46,524 --> 00:53:48,293
THAT YOU'VE HAD
SOME OF THAT.
782
00:53:48,359 --> 00:53:51,329
- OH, YEAH.
- THE THING THAT AFFECTED ME SO STRONGLY
783
00:53:51,429 --> 00:53:52,497
WAS THE RELATIONSHIP
784
00:53:52,597 --> 00:53:54,365
THAT WE HAD WITH THE WOMAN,
OKAY?
785
00:53:54,465 --> 00:53:56,634
- YEAH!
- SHE TOLD ME TO STAND IN THE CORNER
786
00:53:56,734 --> 00:53:59,637
AND THEN SHE STARTED
TO DISROBE,
787
00:53:59,737 --> 00:54:02,206
SHE TOOK HER TOP OFF
788
00:54:02,307 --> 00:54:04,342
AND THEN SHE GOT
COMPLETELY NAKED.
789
00:54:04,442 --> 00:54:06,210
SHE STARTS CRYING
AND SHE GOES
790
00:54:06,311 --> 00:54:08,479
- "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?"
- "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME?"
791
00:54:08,579 --> 00:54:10,315
I DON'T WANNA DO THIS.
I DON'T WANNA DO THIS."
792
00:54:10,381 --> 00:54:12,216
AND THEN I FELT
LIKE SHIT.
793
00:54:12,317 --> 00:54:15,586
AND THEN,
I MOVED FROM THE VICTIM
794
00:54:15,686 --> 00:54:16,954
TO THE PREDATOR.
795
00:54:17,054 --> 00:54:18,723
[RUSSELL]
THEY STARTED EARLY ON ME.
796
00:54:18,823 --> 00:54:21,225
THEY GRABBED ME
THROUGH THE DOOR EARLY
797
00:54:21,326 --> 00:54:23,594
'CAUSE I WAS THERE
A SECOND TOO EARLY
798
00:54:23,694 --> 00:54:26,331
AND THEY TREATED IT LIKE I
WAS DOING SOMETHING WRONG.
799
00:54:26,431 --> 00:54:28,366
- RIGHT.
- AND THEY WERE YELLING-- AND SO I WAS IN THIS
800
00:54:28,466 --> 00:54:30,735
HEADSPACE OF, "OH, MY GOSH.
I'VE OFFENDED THEM.
801
00:54:30,835 --> 00:54:32,470
I'VE DISAPPOINTED THEM."
802
00:54:32,570 --> 00:54:34,572
WHICH YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT
803
00:54:34,672 --> 00:54:37,442
WHAT YOU WALK AWAY
FROM BLACKOUT WITH.
804
00:54:37,542 --> 00:54:38,643
YOU KNOW,
THAT'S A HUGE THING FOR ME
805
00:54:38,743 --> 00:54:40,645
FROM MY CHILDHOOD
806
00:54:40,745 --> 00:54:44,649
IS DISAPPOINTING SOMEONE
THAT I LOVE AND RESPECT.
807
00:54:44,749 --> 00:54:47,552
AND I GOTTA ADMIT,
I LOVE AND RESPECT BLACKOUT
808
00:54:47,652 --> 00:54:49,354
[VOICE FADING]
FOR WHAT THEY ARE DOING.
809
00:54:49,454 --> 00:54:51,356
YOU'RE LITERALLY TALKING ABOUT
YOUR RELATIONSHIP
810
00:54:51,389 --> 00:54:52,390
AND WHAT IT HAS CHANGED.
811
00:54:52,490 --> 00:54:54,359
- [NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
- SO--
812
00:54:59,930 --> 00:55:02,367
YEAH, I WASN'T ALLOWED
TO GO THROUGH
813
00:55:02,433 --> 00:55:04,369
UNLESS
I COMPLETELY STRIPPED.
814
00:55:04,469 --> 00:55:05,703
AND THEN THEY SAID,
"NOW, REMOVE ALL
815
00:55:05,803 --> 00:55:07,605
OF YOUR CLOTHES."
816
00:55:07,705 --> 00:55:09,840
AND I HAD TO STOP
FOR A SECOND
817
00:55:09,940 --> 00:55:12,377
BECAUSE OF WHERE
MY HEAD WAS
818
00:55:12,477 --> 00:55:15,580
BECAUSE WHAT I WANTED
TO SAY WAS, "WHY?"
819
00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:16,647
MY FIRST THING WAS, "OKAY,
820
00:55:16,747 --> 00:55:18,282
ARE THEY TRYING
TO PUNISH ME
821
00:55:18,383 --> 00:55:20,551
FOR BEING A HAIR EARLY
AND DOING WHAT I WAS--"
822
00:55:20,651 --> 00:55:22,286
YOU KNOW, LIKE,
"ARE THEY PUNISHING ME?"
823
00:55:22,387 --> 00:55:24,689
IT WAS "ARE THEY TRYING
TO HUMILIATE ME?"
824
00:55:24,789 --> 00:55:29,394
AND THEN I WENT,
"THIS IS ABOUT VULNERABILITY.
825
00:55:29,427 --> 00:55:31,429
THAT'S WHAT
THIS IS ABOUT."
826
00:55:31,529 --> 00:55:33,731
[NO AUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
827
00:55:37,668 --> 00:55:39,637
I CAN'T...
828
00:55:41,539 --> 00:55:44,709
STOP THINKING ABOUT IF
829
00:55:44,809 --> 00:55:48,479
THE DOCUMENTARY CREW
WAS PART OF IT.
830
00:55:48,579 --> 00:55:51,716
WHAT IF THE FILMMAKERS
ARE MESSING WITH ME?
831
00:55:51,816 --> 00:55:53,651
WHAT IF THEY'VE ALWAYS BEEN
MESSING WITH ME?
832
00:55:53,751 --> 00:55:58,623
THEY'VE ENLISTED MY WIFE,
THEY'VE ENLISTED MY FRIENDS.
833
00:55:58,723 --> 00:56:01,592
SO, THEY'VE HIRED
A DOCUMENTARY CREW
834
00:56:01,692 --> 00:56:04,562
TO FILM PEOPLE'S
DEEPEST AND DARKEST SECRETS
835
00:56:04,662 --> 00:56:08,599
AND THEN THEY WOULD
USE THOSE AGAINST THEM.
836
00:56:08,699 --> 00:56:10,668
[STATIC]
837
00:56:10,768 --> 00:56:15,440
AND IF THE DOCUMENTARY
IS NOT MY FRIEND
838
00:56:15,540 --> 00:56:19,043
BUT, ALSO, IF THERE'S
SOME KIND OF
839
00:56:19,143 --> 00:56:23,080
[VOICE FADING] DEVIOUS PURPOSE
BEHIND THE DOCUMENTARY.
840
00:56:23,180 --> 00:56:24,915
[FADING CHATTER]
841
00:56:27,652 --> 00:56:29,654
[PHONE RINGING]
842
00:56:30,855 --> 00:56:33,691
[PHONE LINE BEEPS]
843
00:56:33,791 --> 00:56:35,526
[JOSH]
844
00:57:36,987 --> 00:57:39,857
[THREE KNOCKS]
845
00:57:41,526 --> 00:57:43,861
[DOOR OPENS]
846
00:57:49,934 --> 00:57:52,803
[DOOR CREAKING]
847
00:57:56,541 --> 00:57:58,543
[DOOR CLOSES]
848
00:58:03,881 --> 00:58:05,683
[GRUNTING]
849
00:58:10,755 --> 00:58:13,558
[WRAPPING SOUNDS]
850
00:58:36,581 --> 00:58:38,916
[GRUNTING CONTINUES]
851
00:58:46,891 --> 00:58:50,027
I WANNA KNOW
WHO YOU CARE ABOUT.
852
00:58:50,127 --> 00:58:52,496
- I CARE ABOUT MY WIFE--
- WRONG ANSWER!
853
00:58:52,597 --> 00:58:54,799
[GAGS, GRUNTS]
854
00:58:54,899 --> 00:58:56,967
[GROANING, PANTING]
855
00:58:59,036 --> 00:59:00,605
AGAIN!
856
00:59:00,705 --> 00:59:02,973
- [GROANING CONTINUES]
- WHO DO YOU CARE ABOUT?
857
00:59:03,073 --> 00:59:05,976
- MY DAUGHTER.
- WRONG ANSWER!
858
00:59:08,178 --> 00:59:13,618
[GASPING]
PLEASE STOP!
859
00:59:13,651 --> 00:59:15,052
OH! STOP!
860
00:59:17,688 --> 00:59:19,056
[WATER RUNNING]
861
00:59:31,669 --> 00:59:33,871
[RUSSELL] YOU GET THE
MESSAGE THAT BLACKOUT
862
00:59:33,971 --> 00:59:35,840
WAS TO TAKE PLACE
IN YOUR OWN HOME.
863
00:59:37,742 --> 00:59:40,277
AND THAT
THEY WILL COME TO YOU,
864
00:59:40,377 --> 00:59:41,779
INTO YOUR SPACE.
865
00:59:44,048 --> 00:59:49,654
I THINK THE FIRST THING I THOUGHT
WAS A RUSH OF ABSOLUTE FEAR
866
00:59:49,687 --> 00:59:51,822
BECAUSE
I DIDN'T FEEL COMFORTABLE
867
00:59:51,922 --> 00:59:54,024
INVITING THEM
INTO MY HOME.
868
00:59:54,124 --> 00:59:55,960
I KNOW THAT THIS
IS GONNA GET
869
00:59:56,060 --> 00:59:58,062
EXTREMELY INTENSE.
870
00:59:58,162 --> 01:00:00,564
I KNOW THAT
THIS IS GONNA BE...
871
01:00:00,665 --> 01:00:03,033
EXTREMELY PERSONAL
AND INTIMATE.
872
01:00:06,671 --> 01:00:07,838
I'VE REACHED A POINT
WHERE I ACTUALLY
873
01:00:07,938 --> 01:00:10,875
DON'T WANT THEM
IN MY HEAD RIGHT NOW.
874
01:00:10,975 --> 01:00:13,911
I'VE REACHED THAT POINT.
875
01:00:27,091 --> 01:00:28,926
THAT WAS A MOMENT
876
01:00:29,026 --> 01:00:31,696
THAT WAS ACTUALLY DANGEROUS
FOR ME.
877
01:00:35,966 --> 01:00:37,167
GOD...
878
01:00:38,703 --> 01:00:40,004
BREATHE.
879
01:00:41,806 --> 01:00:43,741
BREATHE.
880
01:00:44,975 --> 01:00:48,178
[THREE KNOCKS]
881
01:01:12,269 --> 01:01:14,071
[ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
882
01:01:14,171 --> 01:01:15,205
OH!
883
01:01:20,878 --> 01:01:24,782
[GASPS]
FU-- FU-- FU--!
884
01:01:24,882 --> 01:01:26,183
HEY!
885
01:01:26,283 --> 01:01:28,185
OH! NO, NO!
886
01:01:28,285 --> 01:01:30,821
[SCREAMS]
NO!
887
01:01:30,921 --> 01:01:33,023
- RUSSELL.
- MM.
888
01:01:33,123 --> 01:01:36,660
- LISTEN TO ME.
- [GASPING CONTINUES]
889
01:01:36,761 --> 01:01:38,195
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US?
890
01:01:38,295 --> 01:01:39,864
- YOUR RESPECT.
- [SLAPPING FACE]
891
01:01:39,964 --> 01:01:43,000
WRONG ANSWER!
892
01:01:43,100 --> 01:01:45,069
[SCREAMING CONTINUES]
893
01:01:51,876 --> 01:01:53,778
OH, GOD!
894
01:01:53,811 --> 01:01:55,112
I WANT YOUR LOVE!
895
01:01:56,280 --> 01:01:58,783
WRONG ANSWER!
896
01:01:58,883 --> 01:02:01,285
WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US?
897
01:02:01,385 --> 01:02:03,253
I DON'T KNOW WHAT
I WANT FROM YOU.
898
01:02:03,353 --> 01:02:05,055
RIGHT FUCKIN' ANSWER!
899
01:02:05,155 --> 01:02:07,291
- HANDS DOWN!
- I DON'T KNOW!
900
01:02:09,059 --> 01:02:10,795
I DON'T WANNA--
I DON'T--
901
01:02:10,861 --> 01:02:12,262
THERE. GET UP!
902
01:02:12,362 --> 01:02:14,231
I DON'T KNOW!
OH!
903
01:02:14,331 --> 01:02:16,100
GET UP.
904
01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:18,969
- GET UP!
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT FROM YOU.
905
01:02:19,069 --> 01:02:22,472
- GET UP.
- I DON'T KNOW!
906
01:02:27,978 --> 01:02:30,815
[PANTING]
907
01:02:37,955 --> 01:02:40,925
GET ON YOUR KNEES.
GET ON YOUR KNEES.
908
01:02:41,025 --> 01:02:42,960
- GET ON YOUR FUCKING KNEES!
- YES.
909
01:02:43,060 --> 01:02:45,830
LOOK UP. DOWN.
LOOK UP!
910
01:02:45,930 --> 01:02:47,097
- LOOK UP!
- [SCREAMS]
911
01:02:51,301 --> 01:02:52,937
HE TOOK SOMETHING
FROM YOUR KITCHEN.
912
01:02:53,037 --> 01:02:55,039
- IS THAT ALL RIGHT?
- YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.
913
01:02:55,139 --> 01:02:56,941
MY STOMACH
IS TOTALLY UPSET.
914
01:02:57,041 --> 01:03:00,210
I CAN'T KEEP ANYTHING
DOWN, BUT I NEED SOMETHING.
915
01:03:00,310 --> 01:03:02,880
I'VE BEEN HAVING
A LOT OF NIGHTMARES.
916
01:03:02,980 --> 01:03:04,882
EVERY FUCKING NIGHT NOW.
917
01:03:04,982 --> 01:03:06,851
I KEEP THINKING
WHAT WOULD'VE HAPPENED
918
01:03:06,951 --> 01:03:08,853
IF I'D NEVER ANSWERED
THE DOOR
919
01:03:08,953 --> 01:03:10,120
WHEN THEY KNOCKED
THREE TIMES.
920
01:03:10,220 --> 01:03:11,121
I THINK ABOUT THAT A LOT.
921
01:03:11,221 --> 01:03:12,356
I WAS IN BED
922
01:03:12,456 --> 01:03:15,125
AND I WAS ASLEEP
AND I SHOULD'VE BEEN UP.
923
01:03:15,225 --> 01:03:17,261
THE WARNINGS WERE THERE
AND I SHOULD'VE RAN AWAY,
924
01:03:17,361 --> 01:03:19,529
I SHOULD'VE KNOWN
WHAT WAS HAPPENING.
925
01:03:19,629 --> 01:03:22,867
BUT WHAT WOULD YOU
HAVE DONE, BOB, HUH?
926
01:03:22,967 --> 01:03:25,169
- WHAT DID YOU DO?
- IT WASN'T--
927
01:03:25,269 --> 01:03:28,172
WHAT DID YOU DO?
WHAT DID YOU DO?
928
01:03:28,272 --> 01:03:29,907
- WHAT DID YOU DO?
- I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING.
929
01:03:30,007 --> 01:03:30,908
SHUT UP!
930
01:03:31,008 --> 01:03:32,142
THE THING THAT YOU FORGET
931
01:03:32,242 --> 01:03:34,278
IS THAT I SECRETLY
FUCKING ENJOY THIS.
932
01:03:34,378 --> 01:03:37,547
DOWN! IF YOU ARE
SMART AT ALL
933
01:03:37,647 --> 01:03:38,883
YOU'D LET US
FUCKING LEAVE.
934
01:03:38,949 --> 01:03:41,886
- NO.
- SHUT UP!
935
01:03:41,986 --> 01:03:44,889
AND THEN YOU'D GO BACK
TO YOUR STUPID FUCKING LIFE.
936
01:03:44,922 --> 01:03:46,190
YOU MIGHT BE HAPPY.
937
01:03:46,290 --> 01:03:48,292
YOU MIGHT BE CONTENT
FOR THE FIRST FUCKING TIME
938
01:03:48,392 --> 01:03:51,261
BUT IT'S NOT GONNA MATTER--
NONE OF IT MATTERS.
939
01:03:51,361 --> 01:03:53,964
[GASPS, GROANS]
940
01:03:54,064 --> 01:03:56,000
BECAUSE YOU'RE GONNA TURN,
BOB,
941
01:03:56,100 --> 01:03:58,568
AND YOU'RE GONNA FOCUS
ON THE DARKNESS.
942
01:03:58,668 --> 01:04:00,070
FROM THE MOMENT
THAT YOU WAKE UP
943
01:04:00,170 --> 01:04:01,972
TILL THE MOMENT
THAT YOU FUCKING FALL ASLEEP
944
01:04:02,072 --> 01:04:03,908
- THERE IS NOTHING ELSE.
- [GROANING CONTINUES]
945
01:04:03,974 --> 01:04:05,575
LOOK AT ME.
LOOK AT ME!
946
01:04:05,675 --> 01:04:09,379
IT IS WHAT YOU ARE.
IT IS WHAT WE ALL ARE.
947
01:04:09,479 --> 01:04:11,248
LOOK AT ME!
948
01:04:11,348 --> 01:04:16,053
THAT IS WHEN YOUR REAL
FUCKING NIGHTMARES WILL START.
949
01:04:16,153 --> 01:04:17,621
[GASPING CONTINUES]
950
01:04:25,329 --> 01:04:27,131
- DOWN!
- [GROANS]
951
01:04:27,231 --> 01:04:30,067
- ALL THE WAY DOWN!
- [GROANING CONTINUES]
952
01:04:30,167 --> 01:04:34,038
I, ROBERT EDWARD GLOUBERMAN,
AM HERE OF MY OWN VOLITION.
953
01:04:35,172 --> 01:04:37,274
OH, FUCK.
FUCK, FUCK!
954
01:04:37,374 --> 01:04:41,145
- OH, FUCK!
- GO! GET IN. ON THE FUCKING BED!
955
01:04:41,245 --> 01:04:43,380
[SCREAMING, GROANING]
956
01:04:51,221 --> 01:04:53,857
ALL RIGHT, RUSSELL.
LOOK AT ME.
957
01:04:53,958 --> 01:04:56,226
LOOK IN THE EYES.
958
01:04:56,326 --> 01:04:58,963
I WANT YOU
TO REPEAT AFTER ME.
959
01:04:59,029 --> 01:05:01,265
I WANT YOU
TO TAKE AN OATH.
960
01:05:01,365 --> 01:05:04,434
I, RUSSELL CORLAN EATON.
961
01:05:04,534 --> 01:05:08,172
I, RUSSELL CORLAN EATON.
962
01:05:08,272 --> 01:05:10,007
AM HERE
OF MY OWN VOLITION.
963
01:05:10,107 --> 01:05:11,408
AM HERE
OF MY OWN VOLITION
964
01:05:11,508 --> 01:05:13,377
I WANT THIS EXPERIENCE
TO BECOME A PART OF ME.
965
01:05:13,477 --> 01:05:15,879
I WANT THIS EXPERIENCE
TO BECOME A PART OF ME.
966
01:05:15,980 --> 01:05:18,415
- I WANT THE PUBLIC TO KNOW I AM PART OF BLACKOUT.
- I WANT THE PUBLIC TO KNOW
967
01:05:18,515 --> 01:05:20,117
THAT I AM PART
OF BLACKOUT.
968
01:05:20,217 --> 01:05:23,087
- I AM PREPARED...
- I AM PREPARED...
969
01:05:23,187 --> 01:05:25,089
TO STOP CARING
WHAT OTHERS THINK.
970
01:05:25,189 --> 01:05:28,125
TO STOP CARING--
971
01:05:28,225 --> 01:05:29,994
[SOFTLY] TO STOP CARING
WHAT OTHERS THINK.
972
01:05:30,027 --> 01:05:34,298
I AM READY
TO ACCEPT MY FAILURE.
973
01:05:36,266 --> 01:05:39,136
SAY IT!
974
01:05:39,236 --> 01:05:41,238
I AM READY TO ACCEPT
MY FAILURE.
975
01:05:41,338 --> 01:05:43,673
I AM READY TO ACCEPT
MY FAILURES.
976
01:05:43,773 --> 01:05:47,044
I WILL NOT BE A COWARD.
977
01:05:47,144 --> 01:05:48,912
I WILL NOT BE A COWARD.
978
01:05:49,013 --> 01:05:51,015
TOMORROW,
I BREAK MY ROUTINE.
979
01:05:51,115 --> 01:05:53,417
TOMORROW,
I BREAK MY ROUTINE.
980
01:05:53,517 --> 01:05:56,353
TOMORROW,
I WILL NOT NEED THIS.
981
01:05:56,453 --> 01:05:58,022
TOM--
982
01:05:58,088 --> 01:06:00,324
TOMORROW,
I WILL NOT NEED THIS.
983
01:06:00,424 --> 01:06:04,228
TOMORROW,
I WILL NOT NEED BLACKOUT.
984
01:06:04,328 --> 01:06:07,397
TOMORROW,
I WILL NOT NEED BLACKOUT.
985
01:06:07,497 --> 01:06:13,370
THIS IS THE LAST TIME
I ATTEND BLACKOUT.
986
01:06:16,773 --> 01:06:18,375
SAY IT!
987
01:06:19,809 --> 01:06:21,078
SAY IT
988
01:06:21,178 --> 01:06:23,447
OR WE WALK.
989
01:06:25,115 --> 01:06:28,285
- UH--
- THIS IS THE LAST TIME
990
01:06:28,385 --> 01:06:31,221
I ATTEND BLACKOUT.
991
01:06:31,321 --> 01:06:33,157
- WHAT ARE YOU ASKING OF ME?
- SAY IT
992
01:06:33,257 --> 01:06:34,724
OR WE WALK.
993
01:06:34,824 --> 01:06:36,960
THIS IS THE LAST TIME
I ATTEND BLACKOUT.
994
01:06:37,061 --> 01:06:39,396
SWEAR IT!
995
01:06:39,496 --> 01:06:41,465
- I'M NOT READY.
- SWEAR IT
996
01:06:41,565 --> 01:06:44,201
RIGHT NOW.
997
01:06:48,605 --> 01:06:51,075
I SWEAR IT.
998
01:06:55,079 --> 01:06:58,415
[WHISPERS]
DON'T FUCKING MOVE.
999
01:07:28,612 --> 01:07:32,549
[RUSSELL] "I AM PREPARED TO
STOP CARING WHAT OTHERS THINK."
1000
01:07:32,649 --> 01:07:38,355
WHICH, THEY KNOW THAT I CARE
WHAT THEY THINK OF ME.
1001
01:07:38,455 --> 01:07:40,790
"I'M READY
TO ACCEPT FAILURE."
1002
01:07:40,890 --> 01:07:43,493
WHICH HAS BEEN AN ISSUE WHICH
ALSO THEY HAVE-- THEY KNOW
1003
01:07:43,593 --> 01:07:45,462
IS A TRIGGER POINT FOR ME.
1004
01:07:45,562 --> 01:07:49,266
"I'M PREPARED TO STOP WANTING
SOMETHING I CANNOT HAVE.
1005
01:07:49,366 --> 01:07:51,535
I'M READY TO ACCEPT THINGS
AS THEY ARE."
1006
01:07:51,635 --> 01:07:54,171
"I'M READY TO BE DIRTY.
I WILL NOT BE OBSESSED."
1007
01:07:54,271 --> 01:07:57,207
WELL, YOU KNOW,
THEY'RE-- THEY'RE
1008
01:07:57,307 --> 01:07:59,209
TRYING TO GET ME
TO STOP BEING O.C.D.
1009
01:07:59,309 --> 01:08:02,179
"THIS IS MY LAST TIME
GOING THROUGH BLACKOUT."
1010
01:08:06,650 --> 01:08:11,054
PERHAPS THEY FEEL
I'VE GRADUATED.
1011
01:08:11,155 --> 01:08:14,391
[BOB] I'M BUMMED THAT I CAN'T
GO THROUGH BLACKOUT AGAIN!
1012
01:08:14,491 --> 01:08:17,761
I MEAN, IS THAT REAL?
CAN I NOT GO THROUGH BLACKOUT AGAIN?
1013
01:08:17,861 --> 01:08:19,496
IS THAT--
1014
01:08:19,596 --> 01:08:21,265
IS THAT FUCKED UP?
1015
01:08:21,365 --> 01:08:23,066
IS THAT FUCKED UP
THAT THE MOST I--
1016
01:08:23,167 --> 01:08:24,568
THAT THE THING
THAT I'M MOST WORRIED ABOUT
1017
01:08:24,668 --> 01:08:26,503
IS THAT I'M NEVER GONNA HAVE
THIS EXPERIENCE AGAIN,
1018
01:08:26,603 --> 01:08:28,372
- THAT THAT'S IT?
- I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS.
1019
01:08:28,472 --> 01:08:30,174
I DON'T KNOW
IF THIS IS REALITY,
1020
01:08:30,240 --> 01:08:32,509
I DON'T KNOW IF THIS
IS SOME SORT OF MINDFUCK.
1021
01:08:32,609 --> 01:08:34,811
I-I FEEL AS THOUGH
I UNDERSTAND
1022
01:08:34,911 --> 01:08:37,181
THE FIRST PART
OF THE NOTE
1023
01:08:37,214 --> 01:08:39,283
AND IF THOSE
WERE THEIR INTENTIONS
1024
01:08:39,383 --> 01:08:41,218
THEN I FEEL LIKE
THEY'RE CLEAR
1025
01:08:41,318 --> 01:08:43,387
BUT, THEN, AT THE SAME
TIME, I FEEL LIKE THE NOTE
1026
01:08:43,487 --> 01:08:45,355
ENDS IN REJECTION.
1027
01:08:45,455 --> 01:08:48,492
LIKE I DID
SOMETHING WRONG.
1028
01:08:48,592 --> 01:08:51,228
I-I--
1029
01:08:51,328 --> 01:08:53,363
I WENT TOO MANY TIMES.
1030
01:08:53,463 --> 01:08:57,467
I LIKED IT SO MUCH,
THAT I WENT TOO MANY TIMES.
1031
01:08:57,567 --> 01:09:02,372
THAT THEY THOUGHT
IT WAS A CRUTCH.
1032
01:09:02,472 --> 01:09:06,510
IT FEELS LIKE THEY WERE
TRYING TO TEACH ME SOMETHING.
1033
01:09:06,610 --> 01:09:10,214
IT FEELS LIKE
THEY WERE TRYING TO TEACH ME
1034
01:09:10,247 --> 01:09:12,249
THAT THEY DID--
1035
01:09:12,349 --> 01:09:14,818
THAT I DIDN'T NEED THEM
ANYMORE.
1036
01:09:14,918 --> 01:09:16,220
THE FACT
THAT THEY WOULD DO THAT
1037
01:09:16,286 --> 01:09:18,588
DURING A SHOW
PISSES ME OFF.
1038
01:09:18,688 --> 01:09:22,392
BECAUSE IT'S SO COWARDLY
NOT TO GET THE RESPONSE
1039
01:09:22,492 --> 01:09:23,627
FROM THE PERSON
YOU'RE DELIVERING
1040
01:09:23,727 --> 01:09:26,230
THAT KIND OF ULTIMATUM TO.
1041
01:09:35,239 --> 01:09:37,907
I REALLY DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO FEEL.
1042
01:09:58,728 --> 01:10:00,330
[MAN SPEAKING
FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
1043
01:10:15,512 --> 01:10:17,447
[JOSH] WE WERE NERVOUS
ABOUT DOING THE DOCUMENTARY
1044
01:10:17,547 --> 01:10:18,715
IN THE BEGINNING.
1045
01:10:18,815 --> 01:10:20,584
I THINK WE WERE
INITIALLY HESITANT
1046
01:10:20,684 --> 01:10:22,686
TO SIT DOWN
FOR AN INTERVIEW
1047
01:10:22,786 --> 01:10:26,723
BECAUSE THE EXPERIENCE
SPEAKS FOR ITSELF.
1048
01:10:26,823 --> 01:10:28,592
OKAY.
1049
01:10:28,692 --> 01:10:30,294
[SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
1050
01:10:32,562 --> 01:10:35,332
[JOSH] BUT AFTER DOING
THIS FOR A COUPLE OF YEARS
1051
01:10:35,432 --> 01:10:38,368
WE WANTED TO SET
THE RECORD STRAIGHT
1052
01:10:38,468 --> 01:10:40,270
ON A COUPLE OF THINGS.
1053
01:10:44,674 --> 01:10:47,611
I THINK BLACKOUT
IS A VERY DIVISIVE PROJECT
1054
01:10:47,711 --> 01:10:50,514
AND A LOT OF PEOPLE HAVE MANY
DIFFERENT FEELINGS TOWARDS IT.
1055
01:10:50,614 --> 01:10:52,215
A LOT OF IT NEGATIVE,
1056
01:10:52,316 --> 01:10:53,717
AND THAT'S FINE.
1057
01:10:53,817 --> 01:10:57,287
YOU KNOW,
WHEN IT STARTED IT WAS VERY CLEARLY
1058
01:10:57,387 --> 01:11:00,724
DESIGNED TO BE
1059
01:11:00,824 --> 01:11:03,393
CONTROVERSIAL,
AND IF THOSE PEOPLE ARE LIKE,
1060
01:11:03,493 --> 01:11:04,628
"YOU KNOW,
THIS IS FUCKING CRAZY
1061
01:11:04,728 --> 01:11:05,829
AND I WOULD NEVER
IN A MILLION YEARS
1062
01:11:05,929 --> 01:11:07,797
PAY ANYONE TO DO THAT,"
1063
01:11:07,897 --> 01:11:09,566
WELL, THEN, THEY SHOULDN'T
1064
01:11:09,666 --> 01:11:11,768
AND JUST CHANGE
THE CHANNEL AND MOVE ON.
1065
01:11:11,868 --> 01:11:13,670
THE ORIGINAL INSPIRATION
FOR BLACKOUT
1066
01:11:13,770 --> 01:11:16,340
AND FOR A LOT OF JOSH AND I'S
EARLY COLLABORATIONS
1067
01:11:16,440 --> 01:11:18,508
WAS TO TRY TO MAKE SOMETHING
THAT'S "INDISMISSIBLE"
1068
01:11:18,608 --> 01:11:20,777
THAT YOU WALK OUT OF
AND YOU CANNOT SHAKE
1069
01:11:20,877 --> 01:11:22,646
AND STAYS WITH YOU
FOR A LONG TIME.
1070
01:11:22,746 --> 01:11:26,383
IT IS ALWAYS
MORE EFFECTIVE
1071
01:11:26,483 --> 01:11:28,385
TO ALLOW SOMEONE
TO PROJECT
1072
01:11:28,485 --> 01:11:30,554
THEIR OWN FEARS
AND THEIR OWN STORIES
1073
01:11:30,654 --> 01:11:33,557
ONTO A CANVAS
AND ALLOW THEM TO LIVE THAT
1074
01:11:33,657 --> 01:11:35,492
AND SORT OF BE
THE PERSON WHO CREATES
1075
01:11:35,592 --> 01:11:37,627
THE FRAME
FOR THEIR OWN FEARS
1076
01:11:37,727 --> 01:11:40,364
AND I THINK SORT OF EXACTLY
IN THESE MOMENTS
1077
01:11:40,464 --> 01:11:41,831
WHERE YOU'RE PUSHING YOURSELF
TO YOUR LIMITS
1078
01:11:41,931 --> 01:11:44,634
WHERE YOU LEARN CERTAIN TRUTHS
ABOUT YOURSELVES
1079
01:11:44,734 --> 01:11:46,803
AND THAT DEEP EXPERIENCE
BEYOND
1080
01:11:46,903 --> 01:11:48,472
WHAT WE WOULD'VE IMAGINED
PEOPLE
1081
01:11:48,572 --> 01:11:51,274
WOULD'VE HAD IN IT
WHEN WE STARTED OUT.
1082
01:11:51,375 --> 01:11:54,444
PEOPLE TEND TO BE BRAVE
1083
01:11:54,544 --> 01:11:57,514
AND WHEN YOU DECIDE
TO OPEN A DOOR
1084
01:11:57,614 --> 01:11:59,616
TO SOME FORM OF ART
1085
01:11:59,716 --> 01:12:03,587
IN WHATEVER,
YOU KNOW, THAT IS,
1086
01:12:03,687 --> 01:12:06,390
YOU'RE SORT OF OPENING
A DOOR TO A WORLD
1087
01:12:06,490 --> 01:12:08,792
THAT YOU HAVEN'T EXPERIENCED
BEFORE
1088
01:12:08,892 --> 01:12:10,560
AND YOU EITHER
TAKE THAT WORLD IN
1089
01:12:10,660 --> 01:12:12,696
AND YOU LEARN FROM IT
OR YOU DON'T.
1090
01:12:12,796 --> 01:12:15,064
AND THE PEOPLE
THE RESPOND TO BLACKOUT
1091
01:12:15,164 --> 01:12:16,833
IN A REALLY POSITIVE WAY
1092
01:12:16,933 --> 01:12:19,736
TEND TO BE THE PEOPLE
THAT CAN BE BRAVE ENOUGH
1093
01:12:19,836 --> 01:12:22,071
TO WALK INTO IT
AND SAY, "I'M WILLING
1094
01:12:22,171 --> 01:12:24,408
TO CONFRONT THIS
AND FACE THIS.
1095
01:12:24,441 --> 01:12:27,411
AND, HOPEFULLY,
LEARN SOMETHING FROM IT."
1096
01:12:36,520 --> 01:12:38,422
[RUSSELL] AFTER THE LAST
BLACKOUT I WALKED AWAY
1097
01:12:38,455 --> 01:12:40,757
CONFUSED AND HURT
1098
01:12:40,857 --> 01:12:42,726
BUT...
1099
01:12:42,826 --> 01:12:47,330
AFTER SOME TIME,
AFTER THE ANGER SUBSIDED,
1100
01:12:47,431 --> 01:12:49,098
I STARTED LOOKING
AT THE OTHER STATEMENTS
1101
01:12:49,198 --> 01:12:50,734
OTHER THAN,
"THIS IS MY LAST TIME
1102
01:12:50,834 --> 01:12:52,936
THROUGH BLACKOUT."
1103
01:12:55,705 --> 01:12:57,441
THERE'S A PHRASE
THEY'VE SAID TO ME
1104
01:12:57,474 --> 01:12:59,509
IN MULTIPLE SHOWS,
THAT AS SOON AS IT'S SAID,
1105
01:12:59,609 --> 01:13:02,679
IT AFFECTS ME.
1106
01:13:02,779 --> 01:13:03,880
BUT I DON'T KNOW
IF I WANNA SAY
1107
01:13:03,980 --> 01:13:05,915
WHAT THE PHRASE IS.
1108
01:13:08,885 --> 01:13:12,922
BUT, I WILL SAY THIS...
1109
01:13:13,022 --> 01:13:14,724
THE REASON THAT
THAT SCENE EXISTED
1110
01:13:14,824 --> 01:13:18,495
IN MY BEDROOM,
IN MY HOME,
1111
01:13:18,595 --> 01:13:20,897
IS THAT PHRASE.
1112
01:13:20,997 --> 01:13:22,932
AND THE PHRASE...
1113
01:13:25,769 --> 01:13:27,571
"YOU ARE FAILING."
1114
01:13:36,780 --> 01:13:37,847
I SAID AFTERWARDS,
1115
01:13:37,947 --> 01:13:40,383
THAT WE KILLED A DEMON
THAT NIGHT
1116
01:13:40,484 --> 01:13:42,786
IN BLACKOUT.
1117
01:13:42,886 --> 01:13:46,590
BUT THAT SCENE
IN THE DARK
1118
01:13:46,690 --> 01:13:49,493
WHERE I JUST
HAD TO FACE MY THOUGHTS,
1119
01:13:49,593 --> 01:13:52,929
I WALKED OUT
A STRONGER PERSON.
1120
01:13:56,533 --> 01:13:59,669
THAT'S PRETTY
DAMN BEAUTIFUL.
1121
01:14:19,055 --> 01:14:20,957
[DOOR CLOSES]
1122
01:14:25,795 --> 01:14:28,832
[COUNTRY SWING
MUSIC PLAYING]
1123
01:14:37,807 --> 01:14:42,211
♪ DARK MOON
1124
01:14:42,311 --> 01:14:45,549
♪ OH, WAY UP HIGH
UP IN THE SKY ♪
1125
01:14:45,582 --> 01:14:47,984
♪ OH, TELL ME WHY
OH, TELL ME WHY ♪
1126
01:14:48,084 --> 01:14:52,989
♪ YOU'VE LOST
YOUR SPLENDOR ♪
1127
01:14:54,824 --> 01:14:58,962
♪ DARK MOON
1128
01:14:59,062 --> 01:15:02,566
♪ WHAT IS THE CAUSE
YOUR LIFE WITHDRAWS ♪
1129
01:15:02,666 --> 01:15:05,001
♪ IS IT BECAUSE
IS IT BECAUSE ♪
1130
01:15:05,101 --> 01:15:08,972
♪ I'VE LOST MY LOVE
1131
01:15:11,641 --> 01:15:16,245
♪ MORTALS HAVE DREAMS
1132
01:15:16,345 --> 01:15:22,686
♪ OF LOVE'S
PERFECT SCHEMES ♪
1133
01:15:22,786 --> 01:15:27,624
- ♪ BUT THEY DON'T REALIZE
- [MAN'S VOICE ON TAPE] GIVE MYSELF TO YOU.
1134
01:15:27,724 --> 01:15:33,029
♪ THAT LOVE WILL
SOMETIMES BRING ♪
1135
01:15:33,129 --> 01:15:38,635
♪ A DARK MOON
1136
01:15:38,735 --> 01:15:41,638
♪ OH, WAY UP HIGH
UP IN THE SKY ♪
1137
01:15:41,738 --> 01:15:44,273
♪ OH, TELL ME WHY
OH, TELL ME WHY ♪
1138
01:15:44,373 --> 01:15:48,845
♪ YOU'VE LOST
YOUR SPLENDOR ♪
1139
01:15:51,080 --> 01:15:55,685
♪ DARK MOON
1140
01:15:55,785 --> 01:15:58,688
♪ WHAT IS THE CAUSE
YOUR LIFE WITHDRAWS ♪
1141
01:15:58,788 --> 01:16:01,625
♪ IS IT BECAUSE
IS IT BECAUSE ♪
1142
01:16:01,658 --> 01:16:04,728
♪ I'VE LOST MY LOVE
1143
01:16:07,964 --> 01:16:12,702
♪ DARK MOON
1144
01:16:12,802 --> 01:16:15,538
♪ WHAT IS THE CAUSE
YOUR LIFE WITHDRAWS ♪
1145
01:16:15,639 --> 01:16:17,974
♪ IS IT BECAUSE
IS IT BECAUSE ♪
1146
01:16:18,074 --> 01:16:24,814
♪ I'VE LOST MY LOVE
1147
01:16:24,914 --> 01:16:26,983
[MUSIC PLAYING]
1148
01:18:20,964 --> 01:18:23,032
[ELECTRICAL BUZZING]
82569
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