All language subtitles for 1 - Murder, A Self Portrait-eng

(DOGS BARKlNG)

(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)

WOMAN: He's wonderful!

(WHlNES)

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ANNOUNCER.' Last call for the
howling contest, folks.

lt's now or never for
the singing basset hounds.

(FLUTE PLAYlNG)

(DOGS HOWLlNG)

(PEOPLE APPLAUDlNG)

Most original
basset hound costumes

are now being paraded.

(PEOPLE APPLAUDlNG)

Ladies and gentlemen,

the parade of the hero
basset hound owners.

Each and every owner
in this event

rescued his or her dog
from the pound

or took it in as a stray.

Come on. Yes.

Let's hear it for
the happy basset hound.

Oh, yes!

(WHlNlNG)

(PEOPLE CHEERlNG)

Oh, thank you very much.

See? See, sweetheart? Look!

(PEOPLE APPLAUDlNG)

Mine's named
King Archibald.

Well, this one,
his name is Dog.

Excuse me?

He's a dog,
so we call him Dog.

Oh.

King Archibald's won
over 30 awards.

How many has Dog won?

lncluding this one,

if you count them all up,
it comes out to one.

One award.

Oh, really?

Well, my dog,

maybe he's not the
most beautiful dog
in the world

and there's plenty of
other dogs a lot smarter.

But if they ever
gave an award for
the loving department,

he would win
the grand prize.

When it comes to loving,

this dog,
he's the champion.

Aren't you, sweetheart?

(BARKS)

You okay?

(OPERATlC MUSlC PLAYlNG)

BARSlNl: Consider the nature
of a beautiful woman.

Nose of a certain
average shape.

The dimension
between her eyes,
gloriously average.

Distance from nose tip
to chin dimple,

average perfection.

Now, if each feature,
in every respect,
is exquisitely average,

then we call that woman
beautiful.

Thus, the trick
that nature plays upon
mankind and the artist

is to reveal the average
as breathtaking.

You understand, Julie?

JULlE: My back hurts.

BARSlNl:
lt's supposed to hurt.

l'm hungry.

Always.

l'm bored.

Forever bored.

l'm not bored
in bed.

So l've noticed.

Tell me a story.

Very well.

Once upon a time
there was a worthless slut.

She'd rather eat than sleep,
and she'd rather
sleep than work.

So she was rather stupid.

Good. l like her.
Was she very beautiful?

Yes, her face
was very beautiful,

so was her body.

That's why this great artist
chose her to be his model.

Sit still, Julie!

Will your model lead
a long and happy life?

Long and miserable,
l should think.

Do you love her, Max?

Of course.

For her body
or her soul?

You have no
detectable soul.

Enough of this.

Go to your room, Julie.

l have a wife to attend to.

Your first wife
or your second wife, Max?

lt's all the same.

Good, Vanessa.
Perfect, Vanessa.

Everything is in its place.

l want your house
to please you, Max.
Does it please you?

Who am l to be pleased?

Every man lives
in his wife's house.

You should be satisfied.

Well, l'm not.

Ah!

Mrs. Max Barsini
is dissatisfied.

A shocking state of affairs.

Tell me, then.
What is it you need to
make your life complete?

Everything.

Ah, Louise!

Good afternoon, my darling.

Afternoon, Max!

Afternoon, Vanessa!

Good afternoon, Louise.

Well, what seems
to be the trouble?

You are adored, cherished,

(GlGGLlNG)

appreciated, admired,

pretty as a picture.

My wife.

Second wife.

That cannot be helped.

You're an investment broker.

We grow wealthier
by the hour.

See how it all works out?

With you, Louise,
little Julie,

you all give richness
to my life.

l'm blessed.

When will you be
done with Julie?

The paintings
or the friendship?

The paintings, of course.
They're due in New York
next week.

Leon calls every day.

ln that case,
only you can give me
the strength to continue.

Tell me that you love me.

You know that l do.

You're a remarkable woman.

l just adjust well.

Louise, l'm lonely!
Come and be a wife to me.

l'm only your first wife, Max.
Vanessa's your wife now.

l refuse to accept this
constant hair-splitting.

Tell me what you're
thinking about.

Your dinner, Max.

Ah. Everything in its place.

Thank you, Louise.

You're welcome, Max.

Are we alone, Max?

Almost. Come,
fill up my life.

What are you thinking
about, Max?

Contentment.

Tonight, Max, your favorite.

JULlE: Louise's bread.
Louise's salad.

Louise's surprise.

Cioppino!

Mmm.

BARSlNl: And now we share
the pleasures of the table.

Our happy little family.

Silence?

Cioppino is never
to be taken in silence.

You should chatter
like delighted sparrows.

lnstead, you stifle
yourselves with thoughts?

l want you to love
each other as sisters,
and what l get is thoughts.

l see l'll have to
set you a subject,
like schoolgirls.

Very well.

Each of you is to tell us

how she feels
about the other two.

l command it.

Julie, tell us about
Louise and Vanessa.

l like Louise.
She's kind and wise.

l wish she had been my mother.

And she knows
how to make you happy.

Well, l was Max's wife
for many years.

You're still my wife.

And Vanessa?

She's cold to me.

l want her to like me,
but l make her nervous.

She wants me out of here.

l thought we were
past all that.

Max, you're the one
that'll want her out of here.

Louise told us
about your models.

After a few months,

you can't stand
the sight of them.

Vanessa, you were his model.

l was different.
l made myself indispensable.

More than paint on a canvas,
or a girl in his bed.

l think Julie pretends to be
a simple-minded little tart,

soaking up all your insults.

But she's just as
ambitious as l was,
and that frightens me.

And Louise,

she's a part of your life
you'll never give up.

And that frightens me, too.

l don't know where
all this is going.

And so you sulk.
l don't sulk.

You're sulking now.

l am not.

Louise, tell Vanessa
she's sulking.

She's suffering, Max.
We all suffer a little.

Vanessa wanted
to wear your name
like a diamond tiara,

Mrs. Max Barsini.

But now she knows
that if she asks for more,
she'll end up with nothing.

She didn't bargain for this.

Neither did l,

when you divorced me
and moved next door
with Vanessa.

BARSlNl: And our model?

(CHUCKLlNG) As for Julie,
the child's so young

she doesn't understand
what a monster you truly are.

So, it's all my doing, huh?
All this silent suffering?

Not at all, my darling Max.

We all wanted
something from you.

ln the end, l suppose
we all get something.

Even if it's just
a little attention
from the master.

Still, l love you all.

l sacrifice myself
on the altar
of your selfishness.

Come, child, we have
paintings to paint!

Leon orders it in New York,
Vanessa commands it.

The vixen paintings
must be completed.

To work, immediately.

He'll spend the night
with her.

ln that case,
he won't miss me.

And l have other plans.

Good night, Vanessa.

Good night, Louise.

BARSlNl: Thank you,
little one.

That will be all for tonight.

Max, why do you call them
your vixen paintings?

To sell them.
lt makes a story
to go with the paint.

lnfatuation and betrayal.

The vixen who blighted
my life.

My paintings will
make your fortune.

But l'm really very nice.

Then, together,
we'll trick the world.

MAN: Good night, Louise.

Bloody hell!

Good evening, Doctor.

Do we know each other?

Oh, yes. Yes, yes, yes.
l've made it my business
to know you,

Dr. Sidney Hammer.

Psychiatrist, l believe.

Psychologist.

Right. Psychologist.

l thought you'd finished
running barefoot through
Louise's head.

You're Barsini.

Am l?

Good for you, Sidney.
What's your business here?

lf l were you, l think
l'd discuss that with Louise.

Well, you're not me.

Nobody on God's earth is me.

l'm not even me!

Hello, pet.

(SlGHS)

Heard you bellowing out there.

Was l crass and cruel?

About average.

That psychiatrist of yours...

Psychologist.

The suitcases. His?

Mine.

Signifying what?

l love him, Max.

That feeble mind-pumper?

l'm going to live with him.

When?

l leave
in a couple of days.

Well, you might have told me
something about it.

l planned to,
after the cioppino.

So that was our last cioppino.

Oh, for heaven's sakes.

Well, you're a divorced woman.

You're free
to do as you please.

(CHUCKLlNG) Oh, no.

No, l've never been free
to do that, Max.

First as your wife,
then as your...

Whatever the hell
we are to each other.

All of us.

Your women.

Lots of women.

l never lied to you
about that.

No, never.

And l never had
a will of my own,

or whatever it took
to resist your invading force,

all your whims and wiles.

l was ashamed to be so weak.

Really? l thought
submission suited you.

You know, you're put together
differently than other men,
Max.

Your heart, where most people
have a left ventricle,

you have a jackhammer.

That's why l went to Sidney
in the first place,

to find the strength
to match yours,

to make a fond farewell,
put out the lights
and walk away.

You'll do that?

Oh, yes.

Spell's broken, Max.

l'm all grown up.

Look. Dead steady,
not a tremor.

Easy as pie.

Rubbish! You belong to me.

l belong to me.

But not to him.

Louise, Louise,
don't leave me.

Poor Max. l've been
vanishing for months.

You never noticed.

That's because
you never loved me
in the first place.

Oh, didn't l?

How many other women
would've done what l did,
when you did what you...

What did l do, Louise?

We never talk about that.

l made myself believe
it never happened.

We both believe
it never happened.

And Sidney?

When he pokes
around your head,

do you ever speak about
what has never happened?

No!

Louise, when you swim
in your secret place,

just by yourself,

do you wonder, then,
if you'll ever tell?

You're hurting me, Max!

Remember the pain, Louise,
then remember the word,

''never.'' Never!

Don't go with him, Louise!
Stay with me.

Why? Or you'll do to me
what you did to...

Oh, l'm sorry, Max.

God, we're threatening
one another.

We're saying things
that should never be said.

lt's emotional.

Yes.

Partings.

Let's not say any more.

Sleep tight, Louise.

BARSlNl.' Ah, Louise!

Good afternoon, my darling.

LOUlSE.' Afternoon, Max!

BARSlNl.' ''Never. '' Never!

Never.

Psst.
Huh?

Over there,
at the end of the bar.

Yeah?

ls that Barsini,
the artist?

lt seems.

Max Barsini?

l think so.

You know, they say
he used to live here,
a long time ago.

Oh, lived,
worked and drank.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

l wonder if he'd mind
if l went over and
paid my respects.

l wouldn't.

Well, just to say hello.
What could he do?

Smash you in the nose,
break your ribs,
kick you in the groin.

He's a very private man.

Who needs him?

Thank you, Vito.

Hey, after all
these years, Max,

l haven't forgotten
your ways.

l haven't forgotten
your kindness

to a poor artist
and his wife.

Our old home
still up there?

See for yourself.

Louise, is she well?

Very well. Business?

Magnificent.

Lousy.
Lousy.

They don't come
around anymore.

They prefer their white wine
with their quiche,

and their high-damn-tech.

And if l offered a little
gift of money, Vito?

Make the place high-tech?

Oh, the hell with them.
Keep your money.

A painting, then?

A genuine Barsini
to say my thanks.

This place, Vito's place.

Sell it, hang it on the wall,
whatever you like.

Let them come, drink,
and marvel at the Barsini.

You...
You would do that for me?

My pleasure, Vito.

(STAMMERlNG) When, now?

Well, these things take time,
you know, many hours.
Ah, yeah.

Perhaps l'll begin
tomorrow?

No audience.
No customers.
No way.

The whole place closed.

None! Everything
as you prefer.

Max, l already
got you on the wall.

Look here.

Here you are with Louise,
when you were living here.

BARSlNl: Harry Chudnow.

VlTO: (CHUCKLlNG)
Harry with the monocle.
Your first art dealer.

He was a real devil,
that guy.

Fancy English.

(WlTH BRlTlSH ACCENT)
l say there,

will you drink it
down the hatch, old boy?

And then he'd drink
himself senseless.
You remember that?

l remember, Vito.

BARSlNl: Whatever happened
to Harry?

VlTO: Who knows?
Good luck, Harry.

l'll look upstairs, huh?

Go see, Max.

(CHATTERlNG)

(KNOCKlNG AT DOOR)

VANESSA: Max?

A moment.

Come in, Vanessa.

What are you working on?

The vixen paintings.

Can l see?

You know the rule.

Julie's gone into town?

Yes.

You look very nice.
A new negligee?

l haven't forgotten
how to pose.

l can take it off.

l'd be lost forever,

the work delayed,
Leon shrieking in New York.

You'd never forgive me.

Try me.

Later.

Promise?

With all my heart.

Your perfume makes me drunk.
Let me hurry.

Soon?

A twinkling.

You are going to begin?
Yes.

What can l bring you?
Food?
Nothing.

A drink?

l am about to try
and produce a painting

out of this terrifying
nothingness.

lnterrupt my labors once,

even to tell me
the place is on fire,

and l'll grind
your guts and bones
into a new set of paints.

This l promise
as a loving friend. Go!

l'm gone.
All right, all right.

BARSlNl: Hello, Louise!

Can l join you?

No, Max!

Please. That was no way
to part the other night.

l knew l'd find you here,
your secret place.

We'll swim together.

lt was an ugly night, Max.

You know l'd never do
anything to hurt you.

Come, pet, sit next to me.

Then we'll swim together
and separate as friends.

l'm glad.

Lean back, pet.

Close your eyes.

Now hear what
l have to tell you.

Don't look at me
or l'll lose my way.

l acknowledge that
you're no longer my wife,

not even my divorced wife.

Go to Sidney in happiness.
l set you free.

Now l will tell you a lie.

You are no longer
precious to me.

You are no longer
my chalice of memory.

(MUFFLED SCREAMlNG)

My own pet, my own Louise.

My pet.

(WHlMPERlNG)

You will never hurt me,
Louise.

Max?

Max, l don't care.
lt's too much, it's too long.

l'm ltalian.
l have to bring food.

Vito,

you were warned.

Max, please,
what can l do?

What can l do? l...

Lucky for you,
it's finished.

What?

(LAUGHlNG)

This is beautiful.
Beautiful, Max,
it's beautiful.

Not so bad.

l think it came out suitably,
don't you?

Yes. Louise.

Can you come with me, sir?

What?

You're gonna have to
come with me.

Lieutenant's down
on the beach.

He'll want to talk to you.

Mr. Barsini?

Yes.

Lieutenant Columbo.
Homicide.

How do you do, sir?

l wish l could say this
under more pleasant
circumstances,

but it's an honor
to meet a great painter
such as yourself.

Painters do walls,
Lieutenant.

Some people regard me
as an artist.

Well, you certainly
are that, sir.

The whole world
knows that.

The lady on the beach,
sir,

you've identified her
as your wife?

She was my wife.
Her car is up there.

And those are her things?

Yes.

Louise.

This was her favorite
place to swim.

She came here
almost every afternoon.

lncredible.

Sometimes, l would join her.

Yesterday, l spent
the afternoon into the evening

with a friend,
painting a picture.

A bar, of all places.

l never even saw her
yesterday.

Well, blaming yourself,
sir, that's not gonna
help anything.

Would you say
that Mrs. Barsini
was a strong swimmer?

Excellent. l don't see how
she could have drowned.

Well, it happens, sir.

A cramp, an undertow,
there's no telling.

Those are the things
that we have to look into.

Especially
the contact lenses.

Excuse me?

When l examined
the body, sir.

That's something
that we have to do.

She was wearing
one contact lens.

Yes, Louise wore
contact lenses.

Just one, sir?

Well, obviously, the other one
was washed away.

Well, that's what
l told myself,

until l found this.

lt was... lt was there
in her beach bag.

l got it right here.

Maybe l left it in the bag.

Oh, no, here it is.

You see this, sir?

This is one of those
double boxes
for contact lenses.

And here, right here,
there's the other lens, sir.

l don't understand.

Well, neither do l.

Mrs. Barsini,
she was gonna go
out to the ocean,

and she took one lens out,

but she kept the other one
in her eye.

Why would she do
a thing like that?

A whim? Forgetfulness?

Maybe an interruption.

Anxiety to plunge
into the sea.

Well, the evidence boys
are gonna look around.

But don't you worry, sir.
lt'll all be explained.

Now, if you'll just
drive your wife's car,
l'll follow along.

There'll be a few more
questions, sir,

if you don't mind.

Not at all.

ln a manner of speaking,
Lieutenant,

we both enjoy
the same talent.

l don't know how
that could be, sir.

We both know
how to see the world.

Truly see.

The contact lenses,
remarkable.

Oh, l'm just
doing my job, sir.

l think you're
going a little far
comparing me with you.

But it was very nice
of you to say so,

and l'm gonna
tell that to my wife.

Mr. Barsini.

Max, Max, l just heard.

Oh, what a terrible,
terrible thing.

l know, my pet,
l know.

Oh, Max, l want you.
l need you.

Mr. Barsini.
JULlE: Max!

Max, l feel so bad.

There, my pet.
We all loved her.

l love you.
l know that now.

BARSlNl: Oh, l know.

My darling.

We'll walk.

Ma'am? Excuse me. Ma'am?

l'm Lieutenant Columbo.
l'm with the police,
the drowning.

Oh, yes, Lieutenant.
l'm Mrs. Barsini.

You are?

That's a fact.

Then who was that
that drowned, ma'am?

That was Max's first wife.
l'm his present wife,
Vanessa Barsini.

And she lived
right next door?

Yes, Lieutenant.
We were rather close.

Right, right.

Well, that explains it, ma'am.

Thank you very much.

Ma'am, the young girl,
who is she?

Julie is Max's model.
She lives with us.

ln the same house?

And the first wife
lived there?

When she wasn't over here.

ls there anything else,
Lieutenant?

Oh, no. No, not for now.
That's enough for now, ma'am.

Goodbye, ma'am.

Lieutenant Columbo, sir,
the drowning.

Come in, Lieutenant.
l'm Dr. Hammer.

l just got here myself.

When they told me
about Louise,

l didn't know
what else to do.

Were you her physician,
Doctor?

Psychologist.

We were lovers. We were
planning to live together.

Well, isn't that
a little unusual, sir?

A psychologist
and his patient?

We'd broken off our
professional relationship,

and then we met again
a few months ago.

l assure you everything
was completely ethical.

ls there any way
l can help you,
Lieutenant?

Well, Doctor,

in cases like this,
for our report,

we usually check
for suicide notes.

No, no. l've already
looked around.

Physically, emotionally,
Louise was a healthy woman.

But she did consult
with a psychologist.

Well, l suppose

the condition
l treated her for
was her husband.

Her former husband.

That man insisted
they were still married

and demanded his privileges.

He was already married again

and that model of his
living with them.

God knows what went on there.

Well, l guess
we can call that

an unconventional
lifestyle, sir.

Demented, if you ask me.

(DOOR OPENS)

Who is demented, Sidney?

l've got nothing
to say to you.

No condolences?

No grief from
one lover to another?

Nothing but disgust.

Good day, Lieutenant.

Finicky chap,
our Sidney.

lf he owned a shoe store,
he'd buy all the shoes
to fit his own feet.

You mentioned something
about further questions,
Lieutenant.

Well, sir, Dr. Hammer has
answered some of them, uh...

Look up, Lieutenant.

Not at me. Your profile.

Like this, sir?

Now, full face.

Here.

Light over my shoulder.

Your features,

character.

Homicide policeman who
has experienced everything
that life can uncover.

lt would be a privilege
to paint you some day,

if you'd sit for me.

You, paint me?

My pleasure, Lieutenant.

We can begin when
we both have time.

Well, l'll be darned.

You want to paint me?

Wait till l tell
Mrs. Columbo.

And l'm gonna
tell her right now,

because all the questions
that l had,

they just popped
right out of my head.

What a pity.

lt's odd.

You won't forget,
will you, sir?

l'm working on
the composition right now.

l have time now, sir.

Alas, l have not.

The press of prior
commitments.

Right.

Oh, l know what
l wanted to ask you.

Those contact lenses.

Did Mrs. Barsini usually
take out the lenses
before she went swimming?

l think not.

Most people do.

Well, you ought to know, sir.
You swam with her.

Thank you very much.

Oh, that place where
you were painting yesterday,

where was that, sir?

Oh, that's a place
in old Los Angeles,
Vito's Bar.

Vito's Bar.
Thank you very much, sir.

And l'm ready to pose for you
whenever you're ready.

Things are gonna be
different without Louise.

You frightened me.

Max is gonna need me
even more now.

Will you be my friend now?

He'll throw you out,
you know,

once the paintings
are finished.

Do you think so?
And what if he doesn't?

l'll see that he does.

Oh, my.
Such a strong manager.

Shall l tell you?
You're the one who's
going to go.

You little tramp.

Tramp? You're a streetwalker
with an adding machine.

l happen to be his wife.

Without Louise,
you'll make a mistake.

Louise could cook,
l can make him richer.

What does he need you for?

Well, come and watch us
some night.

Alley cat.
Money-grabber.

Brat.
Witch.

Bimbo. Doxy.
Shrew.

You'll push him too far.

He's already
losing interest in you.

ln the end,
he'll chose me.

BARSlNl: Enough.

Look, l am not gonna
put up with this...
Just because
she's your wife...

Be quiet, the both of you.

You should be ashamed.

Louise not even in her grave
and you carry on
like fishwives.

ls this the way
to comfort me?

When l need love,
all l get is squabbling.

Out.

Make yourselves useful.
Cook, pray for Louise,

wash my clothes.

Ah, Louise.

New patients generally
decide the first time

whether they want to
lie there or sit here.

Which do you prefer?

Excuse me, sir?

To discuss your problem.

You said you wanted
to see me.

Oh, that would be about
my report, Dr. Hammer.

Nothing personal.

My report on the drowning.

Accidental drownings,
they want a whole
life history.

Falling down the stairs,

you wouldn't believe
the reports they want
for falling down the stairs.

l guess
it's for statistics.

So, uh,

l think l'll take the chair.

l see.
Well, in that case,

l've had a busy morning
and rather a sleepless night

thinking about Louise.

So, if you won't mind,

l'm just gonna
stretch out here
for a few minutes.

Not at all, sir.
Go right ahead.

(GROANS)

l'm gonna miss her.

l think l know exactly
what you mean, sir.

Well, thank you for being
understanding, Lieutenant.

Doctor, you said
that Mrs. Barsini

first came here
because of her husband.

Uh, ex-husband.

Was there
anything else, sir?

Well, l suppose
with Louise gone

these things
can be discussed.

She complained
of terrifying dreams.

Nightmares.

l'm afraid
l forget the details.

Well, try to remember, sir.

You know,
sometimes it helps

if you just say
the first thing that
pops into your head.

Well, l remember
l was having difficulty
interpreting the dreams.

l always felt Louise
was repressing something.

Holding back?

Hiding behind a memory.

That always made
the analysis more difficult.

Dreams are tough enough
to deal with.

lt's like a riddle
inside a code
inside a cipher.

lt's real detective work.

Everything upside down
and reversed.

The nightmares, sir,
can you tell me more
about the nightmares?

Well, if you're interested,
l suppose Louise could
tell you herself.

l encouraged her to
keep a tape machine
next to the bed

so that she could
describe the dreams

as soon as possible
on waking up.

l'll see if l can dig up
one or two of the tapes
for you.

There were three different
recurring nightmares.

Oddly enough,
each one began with

a knock on the door
in the middle of the night.

That place, that bar
where she lived with Barsini.

Something terrible
must've happened there.

Whatever it was,
she couldn't talk about.

Did you say a bar, sir?

Yeah, but l...
l don't remember
the name of the place.

Would that have been
Vito's Bar?

Yeah, that's right.
Vito's Bar.

Doctor, you've done
very well.

A genuine Barsini,
a masterpiece.

Lieutenant, that's what
a friend does.

ln the old days,
when he was living here,

he was an unknown,
a suffering artist.

Ah, and that's when he was
living with Louise.

Now he comes back,
and look what he does!

l'm gonna show you.

(EXCLAlMlNG)

For me.

Well, that certainly
is a Barsini, sir.

(CHUCKLES)

See, you see that red?
That's a special red.

That red,
that's Barsini red.

He mixes that himself.

Himself?

He grinds it up with
some special ingredients.
That's incredible.

And he doesn't
always use it.

And never with nudes.

Well, it's an idiosyncrasy.
l read about that.

A Barsini nude,
no Barsini red.

That's interesting.

ldiosyncrasy.

He's gonna do my portrait.

Did l tell you
he's gonna paint me?

ln the nude?
No...

Lieutenant,
l thought for a moment...

No, no.

Maybe he'll use the red.

ls this still wet?

lt is wet. Three days wet.

(CHUCKLlNG) Hey, Max, look.

Your painting already
brings in a customer.

What is there in
the soul of man, Lieutenant,

that brings him
to test for wet paint?

Accept my word.
Don't touch it.

l think l already did, sir.
My sleeve.

My painting.

Bring my bag, Vito.
l'll repair it
in my studio.

l'm sorry, sir.

BARSlNl: Don't say
another word.

What are you doing here,
anyway?

Are you investigating me,
Lieutenant?

No, sir. No, no,
nothing like that.

A drowning accident,
no witnesses.

We're supposed
to check up and see

what people were doing
at the time,

you and the painting
and all.

l find that
rather insulting.

To tell the truth, sir,
so do l.

But it all has to
go in the report.

There's no question
what you were doing when
Mrs. Barsini passed away.

A work like that,
that didn't just happen.

Exactly.

Oh, Mr. Barsini.

Dr. Hammer, he was telling me
about your wife's nightmares.

Did you know that she was
having nightmares?

She never mentioned it.

Well, it was a while back,
maybe she got over them.

But Dr. Hammer,
he thinks that

something pretty frightening
happened to her

while you were
both living here,

and he thinks that
she was repressing it.

Um...

Oh.

Oh, that's you and the victim,
isn't it, sir?

Yes.

Can you think of
anything frightening?

No, unless poverty can be
regarded as frightening.

Well, maybe...
Maybe it's all buried
in the tapes, sir.

You know, l mean,
these things that
she wouldn't talk about.

Tapes?

The dreams she put on tapes.
The tapes that Dr. Hammer's
getting for me.

For your report?

Yes, sir, if it concerns
the victim's state of mind.

Are you suggesting suicide?

Can't rule anything out, sir,

just dig into
whatever we have.

Even if it's just dreams.

l see.

l think it's time
we got to work.

l beg your pardon, sir?

On your portrait.

Shall we set our
first sitting tomorrow?

Oh, well, you can count on me
for that, sir.

(VlTO CHUCKLlNG)

The bag! There you are.

Now you're complete.

He even looks
like an artist.

l just wish l could
paint you, sir.

lndeed.

The nightmares, Lieutenant,

l'd be interested to hear
about my wife's dreams.

Former wife, sir.

Of course, former wife.

Would you mind if
l looked around up there

just to see
where it all began?

Sure. Hey, maybe l should
charge money for this.

Harry Chudnow would
make a lot of money.

Who is Harry Chudnow?

Max's first art dealer.
The monocle.

(WlTH BRlTlSH ACCENT) Oh,
l would have to charge you
a lot of money, old boy.

For the police,
everything is on the house.

Be my guest.
Thank you very much.

Okay.

Hi. Want some
fried chicken?

l just bought it
last night.

Julie, l wish to talk
about you and Vanessa.

Come, little one.
Tell me that you'll try
to get along with her.

l won't.

For my sake.
No.

Make an effort.
l won't. She hates me.

She adores you.

Sure.

Vanessa is upset
because of Louise.

l hate her.

See? lt's your fault.

lt's always my fault.

Well, get along
with her anyway.

l won't, l won't, l won't.

The two of you,
you're killing me.

How am l expected to work?

(DOG BARKlNG)

l'm here for the sitting,
Mr. Barsini.

ls this a good time?

Excellent.

You, not that.
l do not paint dogs.

l understand, sir.

Okay, sweetheart, we tried,
but this is gonna be just me.

You see, the man,
he's not a dog painter.

All right, darling, come on.

(WHlNlNG)

You want to stay out here?

l'll just leave him
out here, sir.

That's fine.
Okay.

l'll join you in a moment,
Lieutenant.

Are you looking
for something,
Lieutenant?

No, sir. No,
just something to
take the paint off.

l assure you, l don't
intend to immortalize
my paint on your sleeve.

Sit here, please.

Like this, sir?

Your face like this
to catch the light,

hand here,

cigar up.

This is your pose.
Comfortable?

Not really, sir. No.

Then learn
to make it comfortable.

Virgin canvas, we begin.

You won't see
the result of this

until we're finished
with our last sitting.

Understand?

l understand, sir.
No peeking.

No peeking.

l warn you, l intend to paint
your policeman's soul.

Dark, tormented, pitiless.

Don't expect
to find your portrait
completely flattering.

Well, l'm in your hands, sir.

You were telling me
about Louise's nightmares.

Yes, sir, you said
you were interested,
so l brought a tape along.

Could we play that, sir,
while you work,

or would that disturb you?

As you please.

Okay.

Position, Lieutenant.

Oh, sorry, sir.

l have to get the tape, sir.
Take a second.

You know, my wife, you know,
she's been telling me about
her dreams for years.

Oh, gosh,
she writes them down.

She's fascinated by them.

Sorry, sir.

Oh, here we are.

There's meaning in them, sir.
No doubt about it.

lt's just hard
to put your finger on it.

LOUlSE ON TAPE.' lt's now
2.'15 in the morning.

My dream begins with someone
knocking on the door.

(KNOCKlNG)

Vito has gone home.
Max is upstairs.

lt alarms me that someone
should be pounding like that
in the middle of the night.

l go to the door.

There's a man there,
an older man.

(MUMBLlNG lN FRENCH)

He's speaking in French.

l can only make out
a word here and there.

l've never seen him before,
but l know immediately
that he's my uncle.

He's very agitated.

My uncle has lost something.
He's begging me to help him
find it.

He becomes very angry with me
and l'm beginning
to be frightened.

l call for Max
to come and help me.

(SPEAKlNG lN FRENCH)

Max is coming down the stairs.

He's smiling.

l know that everything
will be all right now.

(SPEAKlNG lNAUDlBLY)

But when he comes to my side,
l see there's a hatchet
in his hand, like a...

Like a meat cleaver.

Now Max is attacking my uncle,

hacking at him
over and over again,

and l'm screaming
for him to stop.

There's blood on my nightgown,
and l'm still screaming
when l wake up.

That's what happened
in my dream.

What do you make
of that, sir?

Certainly a very disturbing
dream, Lieutenant.

But what does it all mean?

Perhaps nothing at all.
Just an attack of indigestion.

Oh, l doubt that, sir.
A recurring dream,
a puzzle inside a riddle.

A crossword puzzle
in a mirror.

A French uncle.
What does that stand for?

A Dutch uncle.
Monkey's uncle.

But Louise had no uncle.

None at all, sir?

None. No uncle.

Then we have to
consider this,

maybe everything's
all reversed.

A reversed uncle?

The uncle stands for the aunt.

No aunts, either.

Well, what was
the uncle looking for?
What was missing?

What, indeed?

Everything upside down, sir.

Maybe your wife
lost something.

Perhaps her red nightgown.

Or maybe you
lost something.

When you were living in Vito,
something you lost,
something stolen?

ln those days?
Nothing to lose,
nothing to steal.

Then there's the French part.

And the uncle
who isn't an uncle.

This is really interesting.

An impossible dream code.

Suppose we try this, sir.

What's the French word
for ''uncle''?

That would be oncle.

And ''my uncle'' would be
''mon oncle. ''

Exactly, ''mon oncle. ''

Mon oncle, mon oncle.

That sounds like
the word for ''monocle.''

Doesn't it, sir?

Far-fetched, Lieutenant.

Mrs. Barsini's nightmare,

the thing that
frightened her so much,

could that have something
to do with the man in
the photograph in Vito's bar,

the man with the monocle?

That would be Harry Chudnow?

Your position, please.

Oh, sorry.
Louise hardly knew Harry.

Oh, l didn't know that.

Well, it's only
the first dream, sir.

Maybe next time
we'll have better luck.

That is, if you're
still interested.

Well, like Mrs. Columbo,
l'm fascinated.

Lieutenant Columbo?

Yes, sir.

They said you wanted
to talk to a lifeguard.

You knew Mrs. Barsini,
the lady that used to
swim here?

Sure. Used to, uh...
Used to see her here
all the time.

Good swimmer?

Good enough.

Good enough for what?

Good enough to pass
the lifeguard test
the same time l did.

What do you think
of her drowning?

Beats me, sir.

Yeah.

Beats me, too.
Thank you.

BARSlNl.' Louise!
Come and be a wife to me.

l'm only your first wife, Max.
Vanessa's your wife now.

She was a cheerful one,
Louise. Very sure of herself.

Confident.

How can anyone be
confident about anything?

Who knows what
the next minute will bring?

No, l only mean that
Louise was a calm person.

lf you don't mind
my saying so, ma'am,

l think l can say
the same thing about you.

(JULlE LAUGHS)

lf Louise had a lover,
Lieutenant, it's news to me.

You mean,
she never mentioned it?

She was the kind of person
that kept everything
bottled up.

You know, inside, like me.

Excuse me, ma'am,
but you don't strike me
as being that kind of person.

With me, there's always
a storm inside.

For Max, it's always
the same weather report.

Unsettled, maybe tornadoes.

And Mrs. Barsini, did she
send out weather reports?

From Vanessa, earthquakes.
She looks for trouble.

l'm a terrible person
if there's a towel
on the floor.

l'm not a complainer,
even though l've got
plenty to complain about.

No one hears a word out of me.

About what, ma'am?

About my suffering.

Even poor Louise
said l suffer,

living with Max,
that floozy model of his.

l've got plenty of pain.
l keep it locked away.

Bottled up.

No one knows.

You would never tell.

Wild horses couldn't
get it out of me.

Begging your pardon, ma'am,
but a pretty young thing
in Mrs. Barsini's house,

posing nude for her husband.

A bit of jealousy is not
that far out of line.

Louise wasn't jealous.

Well, ma'am, Louise,
she wasn't his wife anymore.

JULlE.' Poor Louise.
l never dreamed she
had a secret lover.

Do you think her psychiatrist
would have made her happy?

COLUMBO.' Psychologist, ma'am.

(PEOPLE CHATTERlNG)

Thanks for meeting me, Doc.

You want to look
at the ocean? Hmm?

Come on, look at the ocean.

Look at the ocean.

Don't you want
to see the ocean?

He loves the ocean.

How do you know
he loves the ocean?

Well, Dog and me,
we kind of sense
each others' feelings.

Might be nice
if you could sense
my feelings, Lieutenant.

Why do l feel
so conspiratorial
about all this?

About what, sir?

Surreptitious meetings
with the police,

digging out
the extra dream tapes,

walking an ethical
tightrope.

l don't know if this
is the right thing to do
with Louise's nightmares.

Well, sir,

under these circumstances,
the District Attorney,

he assures me it's all
perfectly ethical.

Opinions from
the District Attorney,

sifting through
Louise's nightmares.

All this for a drowning?

What's this all about,
Lieutenant?

We're not supposed to say,

as much as l'd like
to tell you about it.

(SlGHS)

All right, Lieutenant, here.

Lord knows what you're
gonna find in there except
more blood and violence.

Let me know if there's
anything else you need.

Any problems
l can be of help with
for Louise's sake.

Oh, well, there is
one problem, sir.

Yes?

lt's a sort of
personal problem.

Yeah?

l was wondering
why my dog bit me.

Your dog bit you?

First time in his life.

Well, what were
the circumstances?

l took him to a
basset hound picnic,
and he bit me.

At the picnic?

At the picnic.

Was this
his first picnic?

First picnic, sir.

Lot of other
basset hounds there?

Yes, sir.

Jealousy.

He didn't want to share me.

Right.
He didn't like all that
competition around.

Jealousy.
l should've known that.

You know,
out at the Barsini house,

that place,
that's full of jealousy.

But l never thought
of the dog.

He just wanted to punish you.

He's a very good dog,
but he has to know
that he's number one.

Well, thank you very much
for the advice, Doctor,

and thank you
for the tapes.

And if anything
ever comes of this,

l promise you, you will be
the first to know.

Keep in touch.

Vanessa, my darling.

Yes, Max?

You have never
looked lovelier.

Thank you, Max.

About Julie, my pet.

ls Julie your pet?

Please, be a good girl,
try to get along.

Why should l?

For my sake.

For Louise's sake.

Max, don't you get it?

l want that barefoot tootsie
out of my house!

So now it's your house?

''Every man lives
in his wife's house.''

Every man is entitled
to a little consideration.

l won't have this
damn catfighting.

Forget it, Max.

(DOORBELL RlNGlNG)
You're impossible.

l won't have this. Enough.

Here l am again, sir.

Consider, Lieutenant,
how unfair it is for a man
to live with one woman.

Unfair to the man.
He wants her to be
all things,

comforting mother,
erotic companion,
manager of his life.

Unfair to the woman,
for, in the end,
she must fail him.

Three women, at least one
has the hope of happiness.

But what about two women,
Mr. Barsini, if l may ask?

Two women, no good.

l wouldn't recommend it.

Two is no good.

Louise's nightmare,
Lieutenant.

Well, l brought
the second dream,
Mr. Barsini.

lt's a very puzzling dream.

LOUlSE ON TAPE.' lt was
the middle of the night.

Again, l heard the pounding
at the door.

(KNOCKlNG)

ln this dream, it's Max.

He's very angry
because he's lost his key,

and he's ravenously hungry.

l follow him upstairs.

l see he's opening packages
from the refrigerator,

like butcher meat packages,
pieces of meat.

But he doesn't want them.
He throws them into the sink.

Then l see
what he's looking for.

Strawberries and blueberries,
l think.

He puts the berries
in a large glass,
like a glass bowl.

He sits at the table
and begins to eat the berries.

He wants me to join him,
to sit with him, eat with him.

But in the sink, l see that
one of the meat packages
is fluttering.

l pull the paper away.

lt's a hand, it's moving.

l scream to Max
that it's still alive.

But now Max is angry with me.

He smashes the glass
on the table.

l'm still screaming when
l wake up from the dream
about the hand.

l wonder what we can make
out of that one, sir.

Truly terrifying dream,
Lieutenant.

Do you mind if
l record our thoughts?

Not at all, you first.

Well, sir, she dreamt
that you forgot your keys.

l still forget my keys.

And forgetting something,
that's the same as losing it.

Or never having it.

But never having what, sir?

Money, cuts of meat
that we couldn't afford.

That's what Louise
had on her mind.

Oh, meat and blood, sir,
that's violent,
that's a symbol.

Dr. Hammer,
he was quite sure
about that part.

These symbols
can mean anything,

broken glass,
my taste for strawberries.

And blueberries, sir.

Blueberries?
No, l never liked them.

Well, the broken glass part,
l think that's easy.

What l got here,
they're glasses.

Now, just this part,

half the glasses.

A glass.

Are we getting back to
the man with the monocle, sir?

lt's a dream world,
Lieutenant.

Everything under the surface.

You're searching for meaning,
but you'll never find it.

Well, maybe that's
the point, sir.

l don't understand.

That explains the berries,
what you just said.

Everything underneath
the surface.

Strawberries, blueberries,
berries...

Maybe that's
the dream language
for the word ''bury,''

like when you bury something
underneath the surface.

But what got buried, sir?

My patience, Lieutenant.

Your portrait bores me.

lt's become grotesque,

like this totally pointless
dream game

that leads everywhere
and goes nowhere.

l'm not a painting machine.
Good day, Lieutenant.

(TAPE REWlNDlNG)

BARSlNl ON TAPE.'
...a dream world, Lieutenant.

Everything under the surface.

You're searching for meaning,
but you'll never find it.

...a dream world, Lieutenant.

Everything under the surface.

You're searching for meaning,
but you'll never find it.

...a dream world, Lieutenant.

Everything under the surface.

You're searching for meaning,
but you'll never find it.

Can we talk a little bit?

Max wants us to get along.

Why should we?

Clearly, we don't like
each other.

Cheers.

What do you want
out of all this?

Just to be happy.

Oh.

l used to want to be happy.

What happened?

Max.

l learned three big things
since l married Max.

Only three?

One, it's nice to live
at the beach.

Two, l can't cook cioppino
worth a damn.

(CHUCKLlNG)

And three, there are more
important things in life
than happiness.

Much more important things,
big things.

Name one.

Love.

(SCOFFS) Same things.

Love is happiness.

Right.

Name another one.

Another what?

A big thing that happiness
is more important than.

You mean a bigger thing
than what happiness
is more important.

Whatever. Name one.

l can't.

Why not?

Life is too hard.

l'm an orphan. Life is
very hard for orphans.

You think that's tough?
l'm a double orphan.

l was adopted,

and then my adopted folks,
they died, too.

Double orphan.

That's terrible.

l don't mind.

We have to think about Max.

His happiness.

His cioppino.

His work.

His needs.

What about us?

Now you're talking.

l got her right here,
ready for you, Lieutenant.

Barsini, L.

You like doing homicide,
Lieutenant?

Sure, why not?
lt's nice, clean work.

Now, you take
the robbery boys.

Safes and lofts! Oh, boy.

You wouldn't believe
some of the miserable places
those boys gotta go.

l gotta check this picture.

You got paint
on your sleeve.

l know, thank you
very much.

You know, hanging over
bodies all the time,

nothing but bodies
all day long,

you might as well have
gone into medicine.

Oh, not me.

No, l prefer homicide.
Medical doctors...

l had an uncle,
he was a medical doctor.

The only people ever
came to see him
were sick people,

sick people with complaints.

People got better,
he never heard from them.

Not even a post card.

As soon as they got sick,
then they knew his number.

What kind of life is that?
Always complaining.

You know what that is?

What is it?

Gonna try and find out.
Nice talking with you.

You, too.

Oh, Lieutenant, your file.

Oh, thank you.

Vanessa? Julie?

What is this?

Oh, hello, Max.

Julie, dear?

Yes, Vanessa.

lf you'll ask Max
to help with the bags,
l'll open the trunk.

Of course.
Thank you.

lt's nothing.

Would you mind, Max?
Mind what?

The bags outside.

What are you doing?

Vanessa is leaving you, Max.

Leaving?

Leaving how? What leaving?

l don't believe this!

He doesn't believe
you're leaving him,
Vanessa.

l forbid this.

You know your trouble, Max?
All you want is all there is.

You're like a
swollen houseguest
who eats up all the food.

And while the rest of us
go hungry,

you complain about heartburn.

Madness.

Where does she get
such madness?

Poor, sensitive Max.

Please try and accept this
in the spirit in which
it is offered.

You can go to hell.

Good, out.

Now you show yourself.

Go, out.

Now, for the first time,
you finally give me
what l've always wanted.

Julie, my pet.

Finally we have peace,
finally we have each other.

Darling, Max, let me
tell you everything
that's in my heart.

(WHlSPERlNG)

Out!

lngrate! Tramp!

Model!

Mr. Barsini, sir?

l'm ready to try again,
if you are.

All this, speaking just for myself,

has been a very
great privilege.

Your portrait completed,
l'll no longer be
available to you.

Not even to discuss
my wife's nightmares.

There's only one more, sir.

Who knows what
this one will bring.

LOUlSE ON TAPE.' This dream,
l really don't want
to talk about it.

My hands are still shaking.

lt begins again with
the knocking at the door.

(KNOCKlNG)

This time,
it's l who's knocking.

The door is locked.
l can't get in.

But suddenly,
the door is opened.

l also know that
something frightening
is about to happen.

Still, l have to
go up the stairs.

l find Max
at the kitchen table,

holding a man's pocket watch
over a cup of tea.

He seems to laugh at me
as he says,

''There's something wrong
with the works. ''

Then he drops the watch
into the tea.

But when he
turns the cup over,
there's nothing there.

Then l realize
it will all end very badly.

He seems to be trying
to comfort me as he tells me

he knows what happened
to the watch.

But when he opens
the door to the stairs,

they lead down
into a dark basement.

Someone's been
digging there,

and l see a body laying
face down in the dirt.

l remain on the stairs,
too frightened to go
any further.

Max turns the body over.
l know the face, l know.

The watch is hidden
in his eye.

l know l'm screaming
when Max takes a pick

and swings at the body.

l'm still screaming
when l see the broken glass.

Perhaps, if l ever have
the courage to leave Max,
the dreams will stop.

What do you suppose
she could've meant
by that, sir?

lmpenetrable.

But not unlike Louise
to blame me even for
her nightmares.

And we always end up
back with that monocle.

The man with the watch
in his eye.

A symbol of time.
Louise's lost youth.

But could the watch mean
you were losing time, sir?

And when you said
there was something
wrong with the works,

maybe you were
referring to your works,
your works as an artist.

Very good, Lieutenant.

And that digging
in the basement,
something buried, sir?

Under the surface,
like you said.

And the way
that man in the monocle,
that Harry Chudnow,

keeps turning up
in all your wife's dreams.

Did l tell you that l found
an old newspaper clipping
about Harry Chudnow?

No, you did not.

May l move, sir?

Please.

Got a copy of it right here,
somewhere.

l know l brought it.
Gee, maybe l didn't.

Oh, no, here it is.

lf you'd care to read that,
sir, out loud.

''For the second time
in six months,

''international art dealer
Harry Chudnow is being
sued by a local artist

''for failure to report
the full proceeds from
sale of the artist's works.''

Yes, Harry was
something of a rascal.

Did he do something
like that to you, sir?

Cheat you out of your work?

Harry breathed,
Harry cheated,
Harry was Harry.

l think you killed
Harry Chudnow.

At least, that's what
your wife's dreams
seem to say.

Bravo. The policeman unmasked.

To transpose a fragment
of my wife's sleep
into a murder mystery?

(CLlCKS TONGUE)

l hardly think so.

Poor Harry, off to Paris,
off to Rome.

Harry vanishes.

lf we dug up Vito's
basement, sir,

what do you think we'd find?

Do you think Vito
could have killed Harry

so long ago?

l recall he was behind
in his bar bill.

Well, that's not
important, sir.

There's no way
l can make that case,
not with dreams for evidence.

We seem to be quite
finished here, Lieutenant.

Can l see?

You may be shocked.

Well, l doubt that,
Mr. Barsini.

l'm not even shocked
that you murdered your wife.

Lieutenant Columbo,
my wife died in an
accidental drowning

while l was painting
a picture at Vito's Bar.

Like this one, sir?

You seem to be making
some unfathomable point.

Well, we can get back
to it later.

Those brushes,
are they fluffy?

You see that, Mr. Barsini?

That's a fluffy brush.

Yes, l'm glad you agree.

lndeed, a clean,
fluffy sable brush.

ls it significant?

Well, the day that you painted
the painting at Vito's,

what would you say, sir,

if l asked you how you
cleaned these brushes?

l would confess
to cleaning them in
brush cleaner, Lieutenant.

But when the cleaner
evaporated,

the bristles,
they would dry all stiff.

Cleaner to wash out
the brushes,

water to wash out
the cleaner,

thereby producing
a fluffy brush.

Where'd you get the water?

lf you visit Vito's storeroom,
you will discover a sink.

You might also detect
a faucet to provide water.

But l turned on
the water, sir.

That hadn't been on
for months, maybe years.

l turned on that faucet.
The pipes were clogged.

Nothing came up but sludge.

ls that what you used
to clean your brushes?

l remember now. That day,
on completing my labors,

l was primarily interested
in home and bed.

l washed my brushes
the next morning.

Well, that would explain
why you didn't use the sink.

Thank you for reminding me,
Lieutenant.

But what about your shoes?

My shoes?

Your shoes, sir.

lt's the way you paint,
Mr. Barsini,

very strong strokes.

There's paint
all over your shoes.

And here, on the floor,
by the easel.

You see all the paint?

But at Vito's, up where
you painted the picture,

no paint on the floor at all.
Not a drop.

l see. The case
of the missing paint.

lt's all in the technique,
Lieutenant.

Finer strokes.
Control replaces passion.

No paint on Vito's floor.

Come over by the light, sir.

l want you to see something.

Oh, by the way, sir,
did you see your wife
that day on the beach?

No, l did not.

l told you, neither on
nor off the beach.

You did say that, yes.

Excuse me for showing you
this, sir.

lt's a police photo
of your wife, Mrs. Barsini.

l'd rather not see this,
Lieutenant.

lt's just a brief look,
sir.

See how her makeup ran?
lt's from the ocean.

The eye makeup,
the lipstick smeared.

But the lipstick
isn't lipstick.

Not according to
the lab boys.

They say it's paint.

And you said you
didn't see your wife
all that day.

But that red paint
at the corner of her mouth,

that's your special red,
that's Barsini red.

Just like on this rag, sir.

The same rag that you carried
in your tote bag here.

Do you see the red?

The lab boys even found
her lipstick on this rag.

And the paint from this rag
on her mouth.

So you must've been there
before she drowned, sir.

You had to be there.

No doubt, the lab boys
received encouragement
from a certain policeman.

Well, the lab boys
did find traces of
paint cleaner on this rag.

This is very dangerous stuff.

That's like ether.
That'd knock a person out.

That what the lab boys say?

No, sir.
That's what the can says.

So l'd have to tell the jury
that you murdered her.

Made her unconscious
and drowned her,

because she knew how
you killed Harry Chudnow.

And after all these years,
you were still afraid of that,
afraid she'd tell about it.

You were even afraid
of her dreams.

You've been very enterprising,
Lieutenant.

Still, the day Louise drowned,

Vito and l would
have to tell the jury

that l was painting
at Vito's Bar.

You mean,
Vito saw everything?

He saw everything
there was to see.

Well, he couldn't have
seen this.

You removing the blank canvas.

There's your bar painting,
sir.

lt's that
dream language again.

Everything under the surface,
like you said.

Would that mean the painting
under the surface?

l say you painted it earlier,
someplace else.

Already painted
when you got there,

so you could
go out the fire escape
and do what you had to do.

(SCOFFS)

You could make the argument.

l'm sure you are.

Lieutenant, those last painful
moments with Louise,

what if l had chosen
a clean rag?

Well, sir, that first day
on the beach,

it was the contact lenses.

One in and one out.

That question
had to be answered.

Even with a clean rag,
l would've kept digging.

lt's like you, sir,
you have to finish
your painting.

We both have to
finish our work.

May l see it now?

Are you quite sure
you want to?

Well, l'll take the chance.

As you please.

Lieutenant,

what do you think?

lt's very nice, sir.

l think you've been
teasing me.

ln the end, the hand paints
what the eye sees.

Do you think l could
show that to Mrs. Columbo?

With my compliments.

Do l really look like that?

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