Original subtitles

In

Help me!

What is your first memory?

My first memory is that my parents were

perfect.

My first memory is that my father was

a homosexual.

It's not true that my father was a

homosexual.

My father was a sheik.

All the women loved him madly.

And he was also a king of the

financial jungle.

Help me!

All those millionaire Greek tigers and German apes

were afraid of him.

He was a captain of industry and very,

very rich.

Help me!

He was a test pilot who flew and

flew and flew.

And he was Bo Brummel.

He owned airlines and oil and steel and

half of Peru and all of Guatemala.

He knew everybody, just everybody.

And some of his paintings were acquired from

very most important Nazis.

Before and after that particular war.

And even during.

There was no one who didn't want to

know him.

And naturally, I loved him.

Why the hell do you let that child

run up into my bathroom?

What the hell do you think you're being

paid for?

My mother was not only perfect, but a

great beauty.

She had been working as a cigarette girl

when she met my father.

It is not true that my mother ever

made stag films.

My mother was Cinderella.

Sleeping beauty.

A queen on a glass mountain.

She was one of the greatest hostesses in

the world.

And everyone wanted to come to her parties.

And my father gave her jewels and jewels

and jewels.

I adored her.

You had to adore her.

Why did my little precious cut her hair?

You can spend one night with your own

kid.

One night.

Shut up, Astrid.

You're drunk.

Tell it to your analyst.

What I do is my own business.

I pick my own friends.

Whether they run restaurants or are barmaids or

call girls.

Well, you can't behave like a hooker in

my house.

Who can't behave like a hooker in whose

house, Peaches?

My house is my palace.

There's no man living I've enjoyed it with

anyway.

In my heart of hearts, I'm a sexual

clam.

Shut up, Astrid.

You're a damn fishwife.

At least I'm normal.

You have all the manners, Astrid, of the

gutter.

Of a prized blue-ribboned pig.

I hate you.

I'll always hate you.

Mr. Steele, I'm sorry.

Get the hell out of my way.

That kid's going on a plane, TWA.

Nine o'clock at night, Switzerland, school.

See to it that she gets on it

for me, will you, Jack?

Daddy and Mommy had made a mistake.

My plane from California to Switzerland was not

supposed to leave until the next night.

I spent the night at the apartment of

the maitre d'.

He was very nice.

I played poker half the night with his

wife and two sons.

They really loved me.

Most people do.

And I grew, and I grew, and I

grew.

I grew too large, in fact.

Fat, one might call it.

My name is Taryn Cole.

My last name is Steele.

And I'm a fairy princess.

Willie, do you think Taryn Cole will be

prettier when she comes home?

She'll be fat, Astrid.

Fat.

Willie, please.

She's our baby.

Willie, we're going to give her the biggest

coming-out party that anyone has ever seen

in this idiot city of the angels.

We'll get Yves Saint Laurent to fix her

and Sidney Gielaroff to do her makeup and

her hair and simple jewelry.

One uncut diamond.

And we'll invite all the young people.

Nancy Sinatra and the mamas and the papas.

And Mama Cass will make her feel...

Willie.

Willie, Willie.

I've even been faithful to you for days.

Ten years, God help us.

You are a beautiful girl.

Oh, I know.

If only Mother could wait until I lost

75 pounds and then have my coming-out

party.

Boy, could we flatten them then.

I mean, the right way, in your dress.

You don't get to work on Greta Garbo

every day, right?

Every woman's face is beautiful.

All one does is guess how unique.

Bingo.

Et voila.

That's what I need to look like.

Would you excuse me a minute?

It'll be beautiful.

Oh, yes, of course.

God bless my pleading heart.

And what's best for Mommy to wear?

Your mother is wearing the greatest necklace in

the world, darling.

Marie Antoinette lost her head over it.

And so did your mother.

In fact, I don't think your mother's wearing

anything but the necklace.

Oh, wow.

Maybe I should just wear all of them.

I can pin them all over the dress,

right down to the ground.

I'll be a mountain of love beads.

You wear this one necklace, and you'll look

beautiful, Tara Nicole.

Fat and dopey.

And I need a bracelet to cover up

a cut that I got playing ice hockey

this afternoon.

I'd give you anything in the world.

Thank you.

You gave me everything.

Why, even flying lessons.

Someday, you and me and sweet little Mommy

in a plane with me flying.

And I'll teach you all the little dirty

tricks I know.

Tara, don't.

I couldn't stop your mother from giving this

kind of party.

To show me off?

Or to show off her bod and her

beads?

Mother was a cigarette girl.

That must have been one hell of a

pack of cigarettes she sold you.

One puff, and your private parts went up

in smoke.

And is Mommy coming by to tell me

how beautiful I look, too?

Yes.

You like me in what?

I'm a rare species.

I'm an 18-year-old virgin Americanus.

Not many of them there kind left.

On my way home from London...

The Savoy?

Do you know, I actually thought of solving

my problem by way of an elevator boy.

I was going to pay him.

Stop it, Tara.

I tried, but he didn't seem to understand.

Language barrier.

Cockney.

I've been finished.

At finishing school.

And untouched by human hands.

Oh, my God.

Mother.

Oh, baby.

You have to be feeling miserable.

I know it.

I hate myself for doing this to you.

I did it for myself.

I wanted it to be perfect for you,

but...

It is my dream.

While they were doing my hair, I was...

I was thinking, Astrid, idiot.

You.

You wanted this.

You planned it when you were sitting on

the Santa Monica Pier.

Age 10.

Selling, dear God, cotton candy.

Tara Nicole doesn't want it.

You want it.

Oh, darling, I love the ring.

All of them.

But your hair.

I think we can make it prettier, huh?

Your own is so much prettier.

Oh, baby.

Baby, it is my party.

I know it.

For me.

Just sail through it.

And I promise you, I'll...

I'll never do it to you again.

For eternity Whirling, swirling, ever so slow

Dreaming, screaming Angel, angel, down we go Angel,

angel, down we go Bird

to child, it's time you try to fly

You can't be reborn until you die It's

beginning, look out below Spinning, grinning Don't

know where you're going And you don't know

where you've been There's one way of getting

out And it's getting in When you don't

know why you're sinking And you feel like

you're gonna drown The only way I know

of going up is Going down, going down,

going down Can

you pilot a plane?

Yes.

Yeah, they told me that too.

Who the hell are you?

You know damn well who I am.

Freaked out singer.

Ring-a-ding-ding-a-ling-a-ding.

I don't even know your name.

Bogart, as in the real Humphrey.

My mother went into labor pains during a

Bogart flick.

Machine guns.

She almost dropped me in the lobby.

Bought in the back of a Ford.

My father was a cop.

Delivered me in a parking lot.

Now long live Bogart, Peter Stuyvesant.

I don't give a damn about your money.

I just sold one of three record companies

for two million dollars.

So why were you there tonight?

I wanted to see Freaksville.

I mean, your father just gave away a

half a million acres of redwoods for a

national park.

Is that any way to run an airlines,

baby?

You bet it is.

Where are we going?

You fly, I jump.

What difference does it make to you where

we go?

Your family, your body, your past.

You've lost everything already.

About a dollar and a half you've never

been had.

I bet you think I'm kinky, right?

Yes.

Yeah, but I'm not a loser.

You are.

Right up until right now, baby.

Wow, your breath stinks.

Your breath stinks.

Oh, please.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I dig it.

I dig it.

He's dreaming.

Who?

Bogey owns us.

He stills dreams.

Don't dream around him.

Unless you want your dreams to happen, baby.

He's the animal that's gone mad, born inside

a movie house, inside a television set, you

know, that generation.

Lots of violence in that scene.

Poking up his father's teeth out when he

was 12, just for the pleasure of it.

Right after he saw King Kong.

Enough, baby, that's enough.

How much is enough?

None of your damn business.

My name is Anna Olivia.

Tara Nicole Steele.

This is my new group.

I'm going to produce them.

Maybe with me, maybe without me.

Joe Santoro.

I think I'm going to call him the

Rabbit Habit.

Great!

Little skinny people who look like barber poles.

Have little skinny minds and hearts and super

skinny souls.

Now, whoever said that you have to look

like that?

Well, we say hooray, hooray, hooray for that.

Growing up and growing out, that's what life

is all about.

Growing high, growing wide, leaves you lots of

room inside.

Come on, do it fast, do it slow.

But don't you be afraid to grow.

Take a bony body, what does it really

mean?

It's just a skeleton with skin and nothing

in between.

Now, those kind of folks are no fun

to have around.

So when we pick our friends, we pick

them by the pound.

Growing up and growing out, that's what life

is all about.

Growing high, growing wide, leaves you lots of

room inside.

Come on now, do it fast, do it

slow.

But don't you be afraid to grow.

Do it slow.

Do it slow.

Do it fast.

Do it fast.

Do it slow.

Do it fast.

Do it fast.

Do it slow.

Do it fast.

Do it slow.

You call the police?

I've got men working on it.

Your kind of men.

Detectives!

You're detectives.

We need the police.

All the police ever give anyone ever is

publicity.

Besides, you gave the party so that she

could meet someone.

You're out of your Chinese skull.

She didn't meet anyone.

Who would?

Who?

Who would what?

Want her.

She's worth a half a billion dollars.

Stop it, Hopkins.

You're hurting me.

You're a bloody sadistic duck.

She's in trouble.

I know it.

And you know it or you wouldn't be

here.

You'd be in Hong Kong.

One would think you really care.

I love her.

She's all...

She's all I have.

Mother love.

One would scarcely dream.

I have another late bulletin for you.

She's all you have.

I don't have you.

You only own me.

That's the only way anyone can have anyone,

anything, free love and communism notwithstanding.

As for Terina Cole, she belongs to the

world.

And you just happen to have missed your

chance of being dear mama.

You're growing older, Astrid.

Madame has a child's skin.

Madame is going mad.

Demon drives.

She's gone.

Demon drives.

Think my mother was a hooker at all.

They said that my father spent, oh, what,

his millions.

Oh, what the hell, buying up dirty films

she made.

It's all untrue, bitch.

She only sold cigarettes.

Ordinary cigarettes.

Phone home.

Phone home.

Phone home, phone home, phone home, phone home.

No, I don't want a phone home.

Your mama's got to be turning blue with

panic.

And your papa's probably called his bosom buddies.

You know, the kind he had in the

Army, Navy and Marines?

I sat on General MacArthur's knee when I

was two.

Did it excite him?

I was only a baby girl.

You've got to call your mother.

I've got to go in.

I've got a recording session.

I've got...

No, I want to stay here with them.

No, they're coming with me.

I've got to make them money makers.

Republicans call me a foe.

Bogie, I love you.

Fast, fast, fast, fast.

And don't be ashamed to take me home

and introduce me to moms and dads.

Our town, a boy and a girl, a

man and a woman.

Say, you're going to bring friends home.

Me, them, them, me, me, them, them, Joe

and Olivia Santoro.

The rabbit habit, the chutes, the free falls,

whatever I'll call them.

What the hell will I call them?

I didn't kidnap you.

You did.

I want ransom then.

What?

Ransom.

What?

Maybe your mother.

Or maybe I'll take your father.

The male Amelia Earhart.

He didn't get lost.

He got rich instead.

Of course, your father doesn't know much about

throwing parties.

We could teach him.

You'd really enjoy yourself.

With or without mother.

Mama, with mama.

This is

groovy.

We're having a party.

It's a party.

Mommy.

I love you.

You're the most beautiful woman in the world.

Damn right.

Damn right.

You were born rich.

I was born poor.

But I have class.

Class.

You don't.

You don't get class in finishing school.

But then what am I?

You were brought up by maids.

Maids and chauffeurs.

You'll grow up.

You'll make it with chauffeurs.

Even in stag movies, I knew chauffeurs were

chauffeurs.

And beneath me.

My father read books.

Books.

I think the fat girl is sweet.

Like the Lennon sisters.

I cried when the Lennon sisters got married.

One after another.

Four separate crying jags.

He read books behind the cotton candy counter.

Your father reads the Wall Street Journal.

Only.

Oh, lady.

The baby needs tender love and care.

Sugar pills.

Hi, everybody.

Groovy.

Groovy.

Groovy.

I knew a rock singer once who used

to drink.

Like old-fashioned stuff.

Alcohol.

Did you know alcohol is coming back?

They didn't even call the police.

Why?

But Daddy said, Groovy.

Then Mommy cried.

And Daddy was supposed to go to Hong

Kong yesterday.

To buy china.

But he posed for the whole trip because

of me.

And he's not going to leave until he

just sees me in my glorious flesh.

Does Mommy cry all the time?

Yes.

Must be an allergy.

Oh, Caesar.

Beautiful.

Mostly.

We'd like to have a lot of children.

I mean, you can see Carol Nicole would

make a great mother.

I mean, really an enormous mother.

And being an only child.

I mean, I'm one of a kind myself.

You can see it just doesn't work out.

Look at the both of us.

Crazy.

I don't know whether we want to raise

our children in America.

You know what I mean?

Hell, I'm ready to retire now.

I mean, I'm not as rich as you

are, Mr. Steele.

But, baby, am I rich?

Yeah, and God bless America.

But it depresses me seeing poor people here.

Yeah.

Take waiters in plush restaurants.

Yeah, compared to us, face it, man, they're

poor.

See, now, poor Arabs don't depress me.

Not even poor Frenchmen.

Not even starving Hindus.

Because, baby, they're not us.

They're not our kind.

They're not Americans.

God bless Danny the Red, but that's his

problem.

Man, like, oh, wow, I was really poor,

man.

Before I cut my first record, I lived

on mustard sandwiches.

Mustard sandwiches for a week.

Yeah, my mother always said, anyway, the next

war's gonna be between the blacks and the

whites.

And she was right.

No one's safe here.

Not that I wouldn't give my life for

Joe, but guess who's coming to dinner?

Yeah, forget it.

I got a touch of the tall brush

myself, yeah.

I happen to know that I'm one 32nd

pure purple black Afro-Negro.

Yeah, and I got the documents to prove

it.

Not to say that I haven't really dug

some spade chicks.

Well, a guy's not supposed to be a

virgin, you know.

Hey, how old were you when you first

got laid, Mr. Steele?

Man, I remember the first chick I laid.

Ooh, I was standing up behind a garage.

Ooh, excuse me, excuse me.

Wow, that's like what we call a locker

room talk.

God, I'm a dope.

Marion, gets a guy nervous.

Gets a guy nervous, yeah.

Well, the path of true love always did

jump over a couple of early toilet jokes.

Anyway, Freud said that.

God, if I don't shut up, you're gonna

think I'm some kind of a mental case.

Well, I mean, St. Francis licked the wounds

of leopards talking to birds.

If he did that today, man, they'd lock

him up.

You know that.

Shakespeare.

Shakespeare said that Joan of Arc was six

months pregnant when they burned her.

Her privilege, and to hell with George Bernard

Shaw.

Oh, I'm scared of you, too.

You know, because you really are a great

-looking couple.

A great-looking couple.

And I love your daughter, and I want

to marry her.

I mean, it's unbelievable.

And I hate chairs.

I think you should all stay to dinner.

We thought maybe we'd all stay overnight.

That would be...

We're the only family Bogey has.

You see, we protect him.

We black Afro-Americans believe that that voice

of his comes right up from that 132nd

black Afro-American blood.

And as you all know, sexually, black is

better, babe.

Yeah?

A lot of what he said makes sense.

Are you out of your mind?

I think you better spend a long time

in Hong Kong than Tokyo.

He's slept with her, hasn't he?

Well, he's not going to sleep with her

in this house.

I'm going to say goodnight to her seven

different times.

It's a big house.

And I may sleep with her.

Why do you hate him?

Oh, my God.

He's the new public enemy number one.

He's...

He's got a machine gun.

He's...

He's the petrified forest.

With or without that name, which I don't

for a moment believe.

Tara Nicole, you're named for Tara in Gone

with the Wind.

I like Gone with the Wind.

You'll say goodbye to them for me?

Do you like them, Mother?

Yes.

Do you like him?

Yes.

But he is the sort that makes you

take all sorts of tranquilizers before breakfast, isn't

he?

And wash them down with bloodies.

Slippin' nips and poppin' pills.

What?

Slippin' nips and poppin' pills, old lady, lady,

baby, what a song.

You are my shining star, lady, lady.

Maybe I'll adopt you.

Maybe you'll adopt me, hmm?

Mother lover Let me tell you about a

lady Someone everybody knows Mother

lover Let me tell you about a lady

Always comes up smellin' like a rose Mother

lover She's everywhere you go You know who

I mean Slippin' nips and poppin' pills She's

the all-American Mother machine Oh, bloody mama,

you're my shining star Oh, bloody mama What

a mother, what a mother What a mother

you are Now

I just met a mother And I ain't

tellin' you her name Mother lover I'm just

tellin' you this, mother When did he write

that song?

He does it like in a day, an

hour.

Well, it's appalling.

He's just playing around with it now, doing

weird things.

He certainly is.

Bigger that they are, the harder they fall

Look at here, what do we got?

The biggest mother of them all Damn it.

Stop it, stop it.

Come on, let's pick it up.

Mother!

You damn fool.

Nobody will know it's you.

I know.

Well, they made a song up about me,

mother.

About a fat girl and how she grew,

she grew.

You are a fat girl, idiot.

I don't know why anyone would even touch

you.

See, now

you got to get high, lady, lady.

To see.

High, high, high, high.

High on pot, high on a high diving

board.

Jump from an airplane, lady, lady.

Climb the top of Mount Everest.

Yeah, you see all the way up and

all the way down.

You know, birth control can be controlled in

the mind.

You don't need a pill.

All you do is say, I'm not going

to get pregnant.

And you don't get pregnant.

It's mind over all that sort of matter.

Everyone thinks I don't know who the father

of my baby is.

I do, but I don't tell.

There's no privacy in the world anymore.

Except in your skull.

I knew a man once, did a girl

in.

Kept her in a gallon of Lysol in

a bath.

I don't understand a word of what you're...

But you never jumped out of an airplane.

And your husband is William Gardner Steele.

World's largest producer of jets, turbo jets, prop

jets.

Is he a fag?

Was he a fag?

How old are you?

Oh, wow.

You're insane.

You're all insane.

I don't know what's the matter with you.

Yeah, I better catch up with Lady Lady.

I'll follow all of you in a couple

of hours.

Hey, stop making decisions, mother.

Let go of me.

No, no, you're caught, Lady Lady.

I'm not caught.

Not by anyone.

Hey.

Take your hands off the lady.

I'm all right.

She's all right.

I don't know why even Terra Nicole puts

up with you.

Even Terra Nicole?

I didn't mean that.

Oh, no, that's all right.

You can mean anything you want to.

That's the big secret.

That girl.

And Olivia?

She's pregnant because of you.

Oh, maybe, maybe.

You see, I'm fairly lovable, you know.

But not in the old-fashioned way.

What way?

Don't be my guest.

I don't know what it means what I've

got.

Look in her hand, Rudy.

But don't tell us.

She shouldn't stay the night.

Where?

Her father, Palm Springs.

Shut up.

She's gone God knows where.

She should go to hell.

She's been there.

She came from there.

She's what he said she was.

And he's what she said he was.

God forgive you.

She's got diamonds.

You never bought me diamonds.

They've got maids.

A lousy monkey on the phone.

A gardener.

Who knows what he was.

A fat jack.

No, I really don't understand.

I'm not of your generation.

I only get drunk occasionally.

I only take pills.

Sometimes pills work with liquor.

Teamwork.

I don't get high.

I don't jump off high places.

You and your friends.

Do you want me or do you want

my daughter?

Are they mutually exclusive?

It's a word for you but I don't

think I even know what it is.

Polymorphous perverse.

Why don't you leave my daughter alone?

The way you did.

How dare you.

How dare you.

It's a good lyric for a song.

You see, lady, lady.

I'm just a country boy.

Born on Avenue B in New York City.

Every night from 6 to 16 I washed

out my socks and jockeys.

My mother had a mole with hairs growing

out of it.

She used to punch me in the mouth

when I said anyone who stood up during

the Star Spangled Banner was a freak.

You're the most beautiful woman in the world.

Even at how, how the hell old you

are.

That mind snapper.

The necklace.

The one you wore the other night at

the party.

Like you had nothing else on.

That.

I want that.

Oh.

Oh God, does it love me?

Of course he does.

But he doesn't want to ask my mother

about, about.

Marrying you?

Of course he does.

But he's married to me.

To all of us.

Of course he is.

How could I get down off the ceiling?

But you're not on the ceiling, baby.

I am, I am.

Only 11% of America's black.

Burnt chestnuts.

Fade black.

Dirt black.

And black black.

Only 11%, baby.

They ain't gonna let us win.

Win what?

Hell, I don't know.

We were supposed to win something, but I

forgot now what it was.

I don't think it's a boat I want,

you know, because those guys who run for

president, they, you know, they have to dye

their hair my color.

I guess I was screwed the day I

was born.

He's with my mother.

He's got to be making love to my

mother.

45.

45?

God, I, I haven't, I

haven't yet.

Don't be afraid of it when it gets

too real, baby.

What's it?

Only the poor know.

Oh, the very poor.

What's really real.

America doesn't know.

America's fat, baby.

Good and fat.

Oh, God, is America fat.

And Bogart Peter Stuyvesant loves his country.

He's a patriot.

I love you.

Jump, jump, jump.

I don't know if I was a virgin

or not.

He had two.

Count them.

Two.

Boy.

This is fantastic.

This is really fantastic.

Then not fool

around, Tony.

Papa said it.

Lady, lady Lives in her tower Dines

on her diamonds Drinks of her tears

Her pleasures are plastic Her pain is

elastic Stretching over the years

Lady, lady Once gave her favors In

assorted flavors Savored by kings Now

she's for the taking The making and breaking

And a young gypsy Who sings Lady,

lady Looks in her mirror Reading her

future In every line It's

too late to reach her There's too much

to teach her Lady's run out of

time Lady's

run out of time Did you really make

stag movies?

Only with casts of thousands.

Or dozens, maybe.

Five, six at a time?

At least.

Why?

Just a born communist, I suppose.

Share the wealth.

Everyone in town says they slept with you.

The ones who say they have, haven't.

How much are the beads worth?

Millions.

Literally millions.

Our 20th anniversary.

Years and years of virtue.

Does your husband know you make out?

Nobody knows it.

Even you don't know it.

And I don't make out.

I gave all that up.

But you do one hell of a good

imitation.

I love you.

And Olivia goes skydiving.

And she's seven months pregnant.

Oh, but you're too old to jump, right?

I really am with an old lady.

Oh.

Then jump with us.

No.

Call your husband in Hong Kong.

Why?

Don't you want to report a jewel thief?

No one could break into the vault.

I'm mad.

Oh, lady, lady, that was your generation.

You called people mad.

Send them away to booby hatches.

Or put them in the White House.

Or gave them a big toy like ICBMs

to play with.

Come and get it, lady, lady.

Jump for it.

Come on, jump for it.

Come on, baby.

Come on, come and get it.

Come on.

Come on.

Jump.

Jump.

Come on, get it.

Come on, lady, lady.

The Queen's feet.

Come on, come on.

Oh, baby.

Save your soul, Pernico.

Pernico.

Pernico.

Hurry, hurry, hurry.

Grab her.

Grab her.

Come on.

Grab her.

Go now, instead of being a studios and

being a clown you're going to be a

group of Alaskan bananas.

Go, go, go, go, go.

Come on, dive.

Come on, dive.

Bend over as much as you need.

I know, Lady.

Order in the court.

Mother.

Mother.

Why don't you answer it, lady, lady?

You know damn well it's Hong Kong.

Yes, Willie.

Yes, I can hear you, as though you

were in the next room, or even closer

than that.

You've got to come home, Willie.

I can't possibly come back, Astrid.

Willie, it's never been true, all the cruel

things I've said to you.

I've always loved you, Willie.

People don't seem to fall in love anymore.

The children, don't they?

You sound strange, Astrid.

Is everything all right?

Willie, I'm going to go skydiving.

But you're afraid of planes.

Yes, I know.

And I know it's been embarrassing to you.

I'm sorry.

But, well, at my age, I don't have

to fly the plane, do I?

And it only takes guts to jump.

Please come home, Willie.

Of course, I'll come.

Hello, Papa?

No, today we go, lady, today.

I want to stop in Santa Monica.

It's on the way.

Why Santa Monica?

The pier.

I was born near the pier.

Is that the color of your hair?

I love you.

Dive!

Dive!

Dive!

Dive!

Oh, lady, lady, dive for me.

I can't.

Stand up.

Lady, lady wants to jump instead of dive.

Are those false eyelashes?

No!

Who was my governess after Paulette?

I don't know.

I've forgotten.

Fanny, the Nazi.

That's eight points against the very white lady.

Is she finished dressing?

I don't understand the game.

Fanny was the one with the tattoo.

That would make her a Jew, not a

Nazi.

It wasn't a number she had tattooed on

her.

Well, it was a tattoo.

I can't tell you.

You're not playing the game, baby.

Inside, on her thigh.

Was it bigger than a bread box?

A mermaid.

I don't believe it.

Truth, truth, you must believe it.

Why did I fire her?

For stealing.

That was Annie.

Fanny, the Nazi.

Nine points against her.

Annie stole too, but Fanny was better.

In fact, I helped her.

Steal what?

Your perfumes were missing?

That was Annie.

Truth, truth, the hell with all of you.

I made 30 stag films and I never

faked an orgasm.

You really are a great lady.

Santa Monica for lady, lady, the brass ring.

I don't want to be here.

Why?

I don't want to be where she came

from.

She never brought me here.

I've never been here before.

Why is cotton candy 35 cents?

Why are we spending 20 billion dollars to

go to that garbage dump on the moon,

lady?

Do you have green?

Pink.

Only pink?

Big season for pink.

Don't cost that much, lady.

Hey, you don't have to.

Hey, wait a minute.

What are you?

Hey, what are you?

Hey, that lady.

That's my mother.

I'm sorry.

She's out on a visit.

You know, she used to roll hundred dollar

bills in the sand and then we really

knew something was wrong.

The peacock's flying.

I'm going to be a perfect mother, too.

And athletic.

Oh, why does he let her go?

You wouldn't want that.

The hunter's got to hunt.

Let me go.

You're running out of me, lady.

Nobody ever ran out of me before.

I've never felt anything before.

But you do now.

She's my daughter.

You live in another world, lady, and that

world is dead.

In the Fiji Islands, I read it in

a book.

At a certain age, the natives make their

parents climb up palm trees and then they

shake them down so that mommy and daddy

can go to paradise with all their teeth

and before they're old and before they're bald

and feeble.

And you'll give me back the necklace?

Oh, yes, mother.

I don't want the necklace, poor dear.

It's really too large.

It's terribly vulgar.

Half in love with easeful death.

Then as we fall, free fall, we pass

the baton.

Me to Joe, to Anolivia, to Santoro, and

then to me.

And then to you, Astrid Steele.

There's no road leads to salvation, no way

to paradise.

And the fires, they keep on burning, calling

for a sacrifice.

Sing hallelujah.

Sing hallelujah, hallelujah.

Sing hallelujah.

There is pain in revelation, and joy in

judgment day.

And there's ecstasy in knowing that someone's gonna

have to pay.

Sing hallelujah.

Sing hallelujah, hallelujah.

Your soul

and count your sins if you want to

be released.

Sister, get down on your knees.

Truth is still the highest priest.

None of us can be redeemed.

We're all damned by what we preach.

We all know that it's too late.

So lift your voice and celebrate.

Sing hallelujah.

Nothing is and no one is.

So wash your hands with the blood of

a man.

You see, draft board told me to go

home.

They asked me if I were homosexual.

I said, baby man, I am just sexual.

I mean, sometimes I can just stare at

a carrot, and that, baby man, that carrot

can turn me on.

I'm afraid of dying.

I'm afraid to have the baby.

When I was born, and they brought me

to my mother in the hospital, and she

unwrapped me, she said there was blood between

my legs.

She said it was a sign.

She said that it meant if I ever

had a child, that I would die.

I'm going to be old, an old, old,

old maid.

No, not maid, Aunt Olivia.

Oh, no.

It's too late for that.

Who cares about a 35-year-old virgin?

God cares.

He hasn't sent any doves, not down to

me.

Birth, Mother.

What was birth like?

I don't know.

I had the best doctors.

They put you out.

They...

I don't remember.

Why do you hate me?

I didn't go after anyone, ever.

She didn't promise you a rose garden town

to go.

Ah, with this love of the land will

come to you, Katie Scarlet O'Hara, the

good earth of Tara.

Could you still have children, Mother?

You really are retarded.

I could bring forth nations.

Ah, too late, too late, Astrid Steele.

But you didn't.

Brought forth me.

Why aren't you in the army, Bogart Peter

Stuyvesant?

A war hero, like your husband, in the

last lovely major war?

Yes.

Why should I go out and kill mere

strangers, when there are much more luscious pickings

right here in my own backyard, in my

own bedroom?

This is my bedroom, you know.

Land of dreams.

Do you dream about dying, Astrid Steele?

I am the last old-fashioned girl, Mother.

Fat girls are a remembrance of things past.

Twiggy only dates back to Buchenwald.

Ain't it a magical morning?

Ain't it a dream of a day?

You got nothing to lose by throwing your

blues away.

All you gotta say is hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,

hey, hey, hey, hey I'm all for trying

a little flying to get you high when

you're low Don't

worry about Mommy.

I was champion leg wrestler at Santa Monica

High, my first year.

The year you dropped out?

All sports I've picked up easily.

I was a great beauty.

I'm still a great beauty.

I gave you nine months of my life

and you've stolen my necklace.

I promise you you'll be buried in it.

I'll make Father promise that.

You're a natural.

Just enjoy yourself, baby.

It's Willie!

Just wave to him, Astrid.

Just wave to him.

Don't worry, Papa.

We'll take care of you, too.

Truly, we will.

I really never thought of having a profession.

But my, how I've dabbled.

Daddy is captain of industry.

That America.

But to be a useful person always seemed

to me to be particularly hideous.

Which is my America.

Lazy.

Lovely.

Relaxed.

Oh, Papa, Papa.

You didn't want children.

Why?

They only come into this world to slaughter

you.

Cannibals.

Eat America.

Oh, Papa, Papa, Papa.

My childhood was

perfect.

Paradise.

Lost.

Now, one is driven forward into the future

by the storm sailing out of paradise.

But for a fairy princess, everything always works

out perfectly.

And everyone dies on schedule beautifully.

I've always been lucky.

And everyone always loved me.

But I'm sure I'll never marry.

Much too fat, you know.

Unless I opened an Italian restaurant and I

was Mama.

Mama in the kitchen.

Or unless I was a peasant and came

with a large dowry.

Seven cows.

My weight in gold.

The rest of you?

You're normal.

But, oh, dear God, I'm frightened.

My kingdom has come.

My will is done.

I love all of you out there.

But you just don't know the burdens of

reality.

Get you high.

Sing hallelujah.