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[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
[ENGINE REVVING]
[BELL TOLLING]
The plane! The plane!
[♪♪♪♪♪]
"...all this bother. The princess..."
[ENGINE ROARING]
-Bye-bye. -[CHILDREN] Bye.
[GIGGLING]
Good morning, Mr. Roarke.
Good morning, Julie.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
ROARKE: Smiles, everyone. Smiles.
[BAND PLAYING]
ROARKE: Mr. Timothy Potter from Cleveland, Ohio.
JULIE: What's his fantasy?
Mr. Potter is an amateur conjurer.
He entertains at hospitals and at children's parties
with card tricks
and producing a stuffed rabbit out of a hat,
and all the familiar prestidigitations.
Oh, that's nice. He gives pleasure to people.
ROARKE: Sometimes. That is debatable.
Unfortunately, Mr. Potter is not a very good conjurer.
You might say his sleight of hand is slight indeed,
and his magic...
tragic.
[LAUGHTER]
Oh.
I'm afraid he blew it.
Yes, as usual.
That is why his fantasy is to be
not just a good magician...
but to be the very best.
JULIE: I don't know about that.
-JULIE: What a stunning lady. -ROARKE: Yes, indeed.
Her name Ms. Marjorie Denton.
Would you care to guess her profession, Julie?
Movie star? Maybe an actress
who wants to write the Great American Novel?
ROARKE: Would you believe a bus driver from Philadelphia?
-JULIE: Really? -ROARKE: Yes.
-JULIE: A bus driver? -Well, why not?
She is one of that new breed of women who believe
they can do most things as well as men.
And therein lies her problem.
She has found there is an unexpected price
to such beliefs,
and she hungers for the old days
when women were treated with grace and chivalry.
What's her fantasy, to wear a crinoline?
No, Julie. Ms. Denton's dream
is simply to meet the most exciting,
gallant, and virile man in the world.
Well, I can certainly sympathize with that fantasy.
Can you, Julie? Well...
Unfortunately, to fulfill her fantasy will expose her
to dangers she cannot anticipate.
My dear guests, I am Mr. Roarke, your host.
Welcome to Fantasy Island.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[GIGGLING]
MARJORIE: I'm so grateful to you, Mr. Roarke.
If you only knew how desperate I am to be treated like a woman.
To find a man with some real manners.
Someone to bring out the feminine in me.
That, I promise, you will experience.
And in what better way could I satisfy your fantasy
than to transport you back to the very days
when such men were plentiful.
-You mean back in time? -ROARKE: Exactly.
Julie?
Remember, Ms. Denton, you are going back to a time
when human life was held very cheaply.
Although men gave that special attention to the ladies,
that trait you so admire,
the women were also almost slaves,
subject to many restrictions and sometimes...
great cruelty.
You can't frighten me, Mr. Roarke.
I see.
Then step through that door, Ms. Denton.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Good luck.
[CHEERING]
[BIRDS CHIRPING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
How can I be of service to you, my lady?
[MEN GRUNTING]
I'd like some dinner.
Oh, this way please, my lady.
[GRUNTING]
-[GRUNTS] -[MAN CHUCKLES]
You owe me 10 francs, Gaston. [CHUCKLES]
Herr Potbelly.
Hey, you befuddled oaf, wake up.
[GASPS]
Won't you leave a man to sleep?
That lady.
A handsome creature.
Handsome?
Oh.
She is Desdemona,
Cleopatra, Helen, all rolled into one.
I must win her love or die.
Help me, please. I am paralyzed in her presence.
The sight of such beauty strikes me dumb.
If you wish to do a little business,
why didn't you say so before?
Something with a deep sincerity of feeling, I think.
To penetrate the recesses of her heart,
flights of romantic fancy.
Here... the perfect sonnet.
POTTER: Take a card, Mr. Roarke.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Is that your card?
No.
I'm terribly sorry.
Oh, well...
That's all right.
[CHUCKLES] I practice every day,
but I guess I'm just naturally clumsy.
See, the reason I do my magic is because
I have no family of my own,
and I like to make people feel good.
Makes me feel close to them.
Unfortunately, I am the Great Butterfingers.
That's me.
-Julie? -Hmm?
Oh.
Maybe this will open up some new possibilities for you.
Yes.
The key unlocks that trunk,
which is full of assorted paraphernalia,
items of wardrobe, but, most importantly,
personal journals which contained the secrets
of all the greatest magic tricks of all time.
And who is to say that some of those
great stage magicians of the past
did not in fact possess...
real magic, Mr. Potter.
[CHUCKLES] That's terrific, Mr. Roarke.
I can't wait.
ROARKE: Oh, first, take the trunk
to your bungalow, Mr. Potter.
Study its contents. Study well.
You see, I have arranged for a special matinee performance
for you this very afternoon.
What do you mean, a real performance?
Yes.
Mr. Roarke, will I be ready?
I sincerely hope so, Mr. Potter.
Uh, let me try this trick again.
Take a card.
Is it?
I'm afraid not.
What a shame.
Oh, well... [SIGHS]
I'll have to keep practicing.
GASTON: Madame, by your grace,
I am Gaston du Brielle,
cadet of His Majesty's Cavaliers.
I am, Madame, a little ill at ease at speech,
so I have here penned
a few words from my heart.
When I beheld the fragrance of your face,
saw the stars shining from your eyes...
felt the caress of your sweet breath,
and thus, my angel, plead I this,
enchant your servant with...
a kiss.
Oh.
It's beautiful.
Oh, Madame...
if you would grant me the opportunity,
I could perhaps reveal all my heart contained.
Well, where do you suggest?
GASTON: In the courtyard yonder
in one hour.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Oh.
I think that my fantasy is going to be...
just wonderful.
Thank you, Mr. Roarke,
wherever you are.
[APPLAUSE]
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[QUIET CHUCKLING]
[AUDIENCE GASPS]
[AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING]
[APPLAUSE]
POTTER: Thank you. Thank you.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Uh... I'm not exactly sure what's in here.
Um... I haven't had a chance to check it all out.
Let's see.
It's very pretty.
What's this?
-[GASPS] -[AUDIENCE GASPS]
[APPLAUSE]
What's this?
[LAUGHTER]
POTTER: "To bring forth ye clever beasts."
Well, let's try it.
[CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[RUMBLING]
[AUDIENCE GASPS]
[CHIMPANZEE CHATTERING]
[APPLAUSE]
Master, I'm your slave, Suva.
Tell me, what is your desire?
POTTER: Uh... [CLEARS THROAT]
[CHUCKLES]
Uh, um...I'm afraid, what I really need
is for you to disappear.
See, well, I, uh...
I'm not sure where the formula is.
Um, would you excuse me just a moment, okay?
[CHITTERING]
Pardon me.
-[AUDIENCE CHATTERS] -[CHIMPANZEE SQUEALS]
Mr. Roarke,
this is wonderful, I know, but what would I do now?
Surely, the book instructs you.
I warned you to study well, Mr. Potter.
Now it appears that you are personally responsible
for one chimpanzee and one very attractive young lady.
I wish you every success.
INNKEEPER: My lady.
MAN: When I beheld the fragrance of your face,
saw the stars shining in your eyes,
felt the caress of your sweet breath,
and thus, my angel, plead I this,
enchant thy servant with a kiss.
The same tune.
The same lyrics.
That phony.
It seems I owe you an apology, Madame.
Who are you?
The miscreant who sold that lad the poem.
And several others.
A man must eat.
And drink, apparently.
I see you know my frailty.
We yearn for love, and when disappointed,
slake our thirst with lesser faiths.
Hey. Wait a minute.
I know that phrase.
It was written by...
Cyrano de Bergerac,
at your service.
Cyrano?
Why at school, I read every poem
that you published.
My words in school? Hmm.
It's a long story.
I know it's not very ladylike, but...
I'd like to get to know you better, much better.
Madame, your beauty is indeed overwhelming,
and you honor me, but I am full of fear.
-Roxanne. -CYRANO: Oh, you've heard.
Yes. She, who languished in a nunnery, mourning,
mistakenly believing me dead.
My adoration for her was all the love
that this poor frame could bear
in one short lifetime.
What do you say, Loban?
Would that lady yonder provide enduring entertainment
on the rack,
or would you favor the kiss of a thousand knives?
Why not both, my lord?
The time looks propitious for me to...
pluck that little dove.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[CHIMPANZEE CHATTERS]
TIMOTHY: You know, only one thing really worries me.
Years from now, when people ask me how we met,
what'll I say?
Just tell them it was a magic moment.
[GIGGLING]
[CHIMPANZEE CHATTERS]
Sabrina.
Naughty girl.
Now, you get up there. Go on.
Suva, she is a lovely chimp and everything,
but I can't possibly take her back to Cleveland with me.
SUVA: Well then, how will you arrange it?
I mean, Sabrina and I,
we've always gone together, you know.
I don’t know.
But I do know
I'm not gonna leave Fantasy Island without you.
Hey, wait a minute. I've got an idea.
If I could make Sabrina disappear,
well, that would solve everything
because that would leave just you and me.
-I don’t know, Tim. -Don’t worry.
Here it is, the spell.
"To bring forth ye clever beast."
Maybe if I--if I said the incantation backwards,
she'll disappear.
I'm scared.
There's nothing to be scared of.
I've figured it all out. It'll work.
Here we go. Or rather, here you go, Sabrina.
-[CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE] -Tim, wait. Don’t do it.
[CONTINUES CHANTING]
Tim!
[POTTER CONTINUES CHANTING]
Oh, no.
Suva!
[SCREECHING]
No! Come back!
Suva! Suva!
[SABRINA CHATTERS]
[SIGHS]
Mademoiselle,
I am clumsy with words,
and a self-confessed liar in the game of love.
But I beseech you, hear my case.
Take off, will you?
Take off what, Madame?
My hat is here in my hand, and my sword...
Without it, I would be naked.
Get lost. Split.
Can't you see that I have problems of my own?
GASTON: Mademoiselle, I beg you--
Does this jackanapes disturb you, Mademoiselle?
If you continue to importune the lady,
you will have me to deal with, puppy.
My apologies, Mademoiselle.
Thank you, Monsieur, but why did he run?
He knows better than the to incur the wrath
of the foremost swordsman of France, Mademoiselle.
Would you do me the honor
of accompanying me to my shelter?
I'll get my cloak.
Innkeeper, my cloak.
-I must warn you, Mademoiselle. -Mister...
That man is evil.
He has killed more than a hundred men
in as many duels.
Isn't that why I came here,
to have men fight over me?
He's invited me to his chateau for a visit.
You know this man, friar?
The Marquis Phillippe de Sade.
An evil man, like you told the lady.
More than you can guess, my friend.
He will sire a line which will produce
the most infamous name in French history,
and give rise to a new word
describing cruelty.
POTTER: I don’t know where Suva came from, Mr. Roarke,
but I'll tell you, in just a couple of hours,
that girl changed my life.
Many fortunate men have had that exciting experience, Mr. Potter.
-Exciting? -Yes.
Mr. Roarke, this isn’t just excitement.
Oh?
No, uh, I... well...
I think I love Suva.
Well, then you must use your magical powers, Mr. Potter.
This is your fantasy. You must find a way.
-I lack the finesse. -Oh. No. No.
You have not really given yourself
the chance to find that out.
You attempted too much, too soon. That’s all.
You did warn me, didn’t you?
-I just got carried away. -Yes.
And I now suggest that I arrange for you
to give another performance.
Perhaps if we duplicate exactly, exactly,
the conditions of the first show,
you will be able to make the young lady
appear again tonight.
Well, then, it would have to be on the stage.
And maybe the audience is important too.
Oh, indeed. But do your homework, Mr. Potter.
Plan. Memorize, huh?
I promise I will, Mr. Roarke.
And tonight on that stage, I'll bring Suva back.
I will make it happen.
Good. Good.
[SABRINA CHATTERS]
What cause have you to complain, horse?
What about me?
Me, the spinner of golden words and weaver of dreams,
sleeping on straw
and eating from garbage piles...
...without even a lock on my door.
We have come for our money,
you pernicious fabricator.
You sold us both the same song.
Have you no comment?
Your unseemly entrance caused me to nick my face.
I will nick more than that.
En garde.
I have no money,
and I am without a sword.
Then fight with your nose,
you craven poltroon.
It outspans my rapier by at least a foot.
Gaston, the lady Marjorie has been seen entering
the chateau of the Marquis de Sade.
Oh, that monster.
He will butcher her, inch by inch.
By our oath of chivalry,
we must rescue her from his evil pleasure.
Ah. Death to the Marquis.
-Onward! Forward! -Death to the Marquis de Sade.
They have about as much hope of defeating de Sade
and rescuing that girl
as you have of winning the two-kilometer dash
at Reims.
[NICKERS]
Marjorie showed me much respect.
She knew of my poor scribbling.
She professed her love.
Seems we have been summoned from retirement, old friend.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[HORSE NEIGHS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[SABRINA CHITTERING]
Sabrina, please don't do that. I'm trying to learn my lines.
[CHITTERING]
Brochure said no pets.
He's got an ape in there.
It's part of his act. It's different.
I mean...
he's an artiste.
"Formula for further transformations."
Maybe that'll do it.
"North weed and birch, bright bloom of bracken.
North weed and birch. Shazam."
Oh!
[SCREAMS]
Miriam!
-POTTER: No, no, no! -What have you--
Listen, there's no reason to be frightened.
-Don't... -It was a mistake!
-...touch me! -I was just practicing.
Oh, you-- Help!
Hi.
-Help! -This is not what it looks like
-at all. -[WAILS]
I don’t know how you did it,
but I'm going to break your magic wand.
[HOOTING]
-[SABRINA SCREECHING] -[MIRIAM YELPS]
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Get away from me.
Call off your pet.
I'm awfully sorry, but why should I?
[SCREECHING CONTINUES]
[MIRIAM WAILS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Even the sword of the Marquis de Sade
will not prevail against the three of us.
-Right? -Right.
Right.
Death to the monster de Sade.
GASTON: En garde.
[SWORDS CLANKING]
Next time, I shall kill the lot of you.
DE SADE: Forgive the interruption.
Some unwelcome visitors.
The venison is not to your liking?
MARJORIE: Well, I, uh... I guess I'm just not hungry.
DE SADE: Then try a little of this Burgundy...
from my own vineyard.
Exquisite, is it not?
Oh, it's marvelous.
Wine is truly the ambrosia of the gods.
It gives us great pleasure.
But there are many other delights
we humans are privileged to enjoy.
Killing a hated enemy,
loving a beautiful woman,
giving and receiving pain.
Pain?
The rarest form of pleasure.
Soon to be all the fashion in Paris.
The exaltation that comes with surrender to it...
is an extreme of bliss,
an ultimate of passion.
How thoughtless of me.
You are weary.
Loban will escort you to your chamber to rest.
Oh, I... I'd rather return to the inn, please.
Alas, the roads are too dangerous
for a high-born lady.
We shall continue this discussion later,
but I will show you
what unseen delights await you.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Ladies and gentlemen,
those of you who saw my first performance
will recall that I made a young lady appear
out of nowhere.
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER] -[APPLAUSE]
Thank you.
Unfortunately, she's lost again.
[LAUGHTER]
Her name is Suva.
I'm going to try to make her reappear
in exactly the same way as I made her appear before.
Everything will be the same.
Can you help me do that?
-[INDISTINCT CHATTER] -[APPLAUSE]
Thank you.
Thank you.
[CHANTS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
-[CONTINUES CHANTING] -[RUMBLING]
-[EXPLOSION] -[AUDIENCE GASPS]
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
Suva, come to me.
I can't.
Tim, help me.
Hold on, Suva. Don't let go.
I can't help it.
I love you, Tim.
I'll always love you.
Goodbye.
[AUDIENCE MUTTERING]
Mr. Roarke, I lost her forever.
[SABRINA CHATTERS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[GASPS]
Forgive this intrusion, Mademoiselle.
-I come as a friend. -How did you get here?
In the old days, I was a frequent guest
of the Marquis' father, a most honorable man,
much shamed by this creature who bears his name.
There is a secret passageway through which I propose
to take you to safety.
-[WOMAN SCREAMS] -[GASPS]
What's that?
The Marquis at sport in the dungeons below.
Come. We must hurry.
Did you really think you could outwit
the Marquis de Sade?
Such antics are for younger men.
Dispose of him...
in some suitable fashion.
And take the lady to my palace of pleasures.
CYRANO: So much for life.
[SIGHS]
Is that it?
Are you going to accept death just like that?
I always thought that you were a man of honor.
Challenge him to a duel.
You wish me to do battle at my age and in my condition?
I wish you to display a sense of chivalry, Monsieur.
My lord.
When I was a guest of your father,
a blessed memory, he confided in me
his deep despair for your future.
He feared your mother's indulgence
had softened your masculinity
beyond the point of recovery so that you would be forced
to spend your life testing it.
Honor demands you pay for those words
on the point of my sword.
Prepare him for combat.
We shall deal with the woman when I have impaled him
like the squealing pig he is.
You were wonderful.
The pleasure will be all his, I fear.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Suva, can you hear me?
I don't know where you are.
I'm not even sure what you are.
But I know you're out there.
[SABRINA WHIMPERS]
And I know I love you.
And I don't wanna stay here without you.
[WHIMPERS]
So maybe if you can't come to me,
maybe I can come to you.
I'm gonna try and make myself disappear
exactly the same way I made you disappear
in the bungalow.
[CHITTERING]
It'll be my last trick...
I hope, my best one ever.
If it works,
maybe I'll be out there where you are...
wherever that is.
[CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
Sabrina, please don't do that.
-Stop it. -ROARKE: No.
Let her, Mr. Potter.
Let Sabrina turn the page.
All right.
Go ahead.
Read it, Mr. Potter.
[CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
[RUMBLING]
Suva! [LAUGHS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
-[INSECTS CHIRPING] -[FROGS CROAKING]
I fear you have picked a poor champion, Mademoiselle.
A thousand gallons of Rhenish wine
have created this monument.
I cannot expect to disperse them in a moment.
You make me feel so proud.
Oh. [KISSES]
Risking your life for me.
Come to chide again, brother,
or to say my last rights?
On the contrary, I come to comfort and encourage you.
It would take new eyes
and a fresh apparatus of muscles to do that.
Victory comes not only from strength and skill,
but from a man's mind.
If he thinks he's going to lose,
be sure he will.
Think about that.
You realize I have no control over the outcome.
You mean, he might lose?
In this age, "lose" is another word for "die."
Chivalry is a beautiful concept, Ms. Denton,
until you're on its cutting edge.
But it's only a fantasy, Mr. Roarke.
Can't you do something?
Alas, once a fantasy is underway,
it's out of my hands.
But have faith in yourself, Ms. Denton.
And in your love.
Love is the overwhelming force of the universe.
It transcends all barriers and overcomes all obstacles.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
It is time.
DE SADE: En garde.
[GRUNTING]
A younger man would have had me then.
[GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
[GROANS]
First blood.
[GRUNTS]
When I tire of this mild pleasure,
when I've killed this clod,
I have the most...
exquisite pleasures in mind for you, my dear.
[GASPS]
Why not fight on with your nose?
[LAUGHS] It's long enough.
ROARKE: If a man thinks he's going to lose,
-he surely will. -[GRUNTS]
CYRANO: Long enough?
Your command of language is as feeble
as your swordsmanship!
And now this nose is a pier
stretching into the ocean of infinity,
a noble spire worthy of divinity.
And taunts are thrown like a Grecian discus
by foolish fobs with less proboscis.
He who disparages his nose
plants seeds of his destruction.
This exalted beak presents a warning:
a key factor of eternal torment.
But your blade, 'tis time to flee.
He who offends the snout,
he insults me...
and at his peril.
You're not worth soiling my blade,
you miserable perverted popinjay.
[GASPS]
Oh, you were magnificent. You were marvelous.
It was something that monk said
about the power of thinking.
Your courage and...
My love.
My darling.
ROARKE: Ms. Denton,
you must come with me now.
Your fantasy is over.
Oh, no. No, please.
Let us spend just a little time together.
I'm sorry.
MARJORIE: One kiss, and I'm in love
with a charming, brave,
and wonderful ghost.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
Mr. Roarke, uh...
I know I don't have any right to ask you this,
but please, don't separate us again.
But the young lady was only a part of your fantasy,
Mr. Potter, which is now over.
Julie.
Sorry, Mr. Potter, but...
rules are rules.
ROARKE: You must now make her disappear once more.
For the last time.
I understand what must be done.
Goodbye, Tim.
Read it, Mr. Potter. Read it.
[CHANTING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]
-[RUMBLING] -[FINISHES CHANT]
[EXPLODES]
Well, she's gone.
Ah, but the difference is, she has gone...
to Cleveland, Mr. Potter.
To Cleveland?
[CHUCKLES] That's right.
She'll be waiting for you when you get home.
Mr. Roarke, what can I say?
No more spells, Mr. Potter.
From now on stick to conjuring--
thank you-- and card tricks, huh?
Thank you.
-You're very welcome. -Thank you.
Very welcome, Mr. Potter.
-Julie. -Goodbye.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
[MARJORIE SIGHS]
You don't seem happy, Ms. Denton.
Didn't you enjoy your fantasy?
It was what I asked, but, oh,
I would have liked to have known Cyrano better.
He was everything in the world I wanted in a man.
I see.
Unfortunately, your request didn't specify
a lasting relationship.
Well, at least I got to know him.
It's something that I'll treasure
for the rest of my life.
Thank you, Mr. Roarke.
Before you go, may I introduce Monsieur Berandt Sabatier,
a college professor who loves Cyrano's work
as much as you,
and wanted to relive his last days.
-You're... -Appearances are sometimes
deceptive, Ms. Denton,
but trust your heart.
The nose went with the role.
Do you mind?
It wouldn't have made any difference.
Thus, my angel, plead I this,
enchant thy servant with a kiss.
[♪♪♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
[SIGHS]
[♪♪♪♪♪]
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