Original subtitles

[♪♪]

[BELL CLANGS]

The plane! The plane!

[GIGGLING]

Tattoo, is something the matter?

My cousin Hugo. He’s in the hospital.

Oh, that’s terrible. What’s wrong?

His girlfriend.

When she found out he was married,

she threw him over.

But why would his girlfriend throw him over,

put him in the hospital?

Because she threw him over a cliff.

[♪♪]

Smiles, everyone. Smiles.

[PLAYING HAWAIIAN MUSIC]

TATTOO: Who is she, boss?

ROARKE: Sister Mary Theresa.

TATTOO: You mean she’s a nun?

But how come she’s dressed like that?

Because for this weekend she wants to be just Mary Hoyt,

the woman she was before she entered the convent

and became a Sister almost seven years ago.

TATTOO: She does not want to be a nun anymore?

ROARKE: Even she is not sure, Tattoo.

Ever since her best friend, also a nun,

died last month at the age of 35.

Sister Mary Theresa’s wondering

if she was ever meant to be a nun at all.

And now next week

she’s supposed to take her final vows.

Vows that will last a lifetime.

But, boss, how can we help her?

By helping her make a choice very clear.

You see, several years ago she met a young man.

A young man who doesn’t even remember her.

There was something special about him.

Something that if there were ever a man she could love,

be a wife to, he could be that man.

Can you do that, boss? Can you bring that man here?

He’s already on the island, Tattoo.

They will meet this weekend,

and Sister Mary Theresa will have to make a decision.

Him...

or the Church.

Mr. Felix Birdsong.

A certified public accountant

all the way from Waukegan, Illinois.

TATTOO: What’s his fantasy, boss?

ROARKE: Oh, one shared by millions of red-blooded men

throughout the world, Tattoo.

Mr. Birdsong, an avid movie fan all his life,

wishes to become casting director

for a major motion picture.

You mean with all this beautiful talent,

dressing up, trying to get the part?

Oh, much more than that, my friend.

What do you mean, boss? Well, you see

the name of the movie Mr. Birdsong is casting

is The Most Beautiful Girl in the World.

It will be his responsibility to decide

which of the gorgeous 20 finalists

already assembled here best befits the title.

Do you think he needs an assistant?

Boss, I know her. It’s Miss Garwood,

the famous newslady on TV. That’s right.

Is she here for the big award show?

Well, that’s what Miss Garwood

would like the world to believe.

In fact, it’s already been announced

she’s won the most prestigious honor.

But there is something else?

There most certainly is, Tattoo.

You see, Miss Garwood won an award

for an exposé of Satanic cults called the Black Mask.

Since that program was aired a year ago,

three men very close to her

have all died in tragic accidents

and she blames herself.

You mean she’s a jinx?

"Cursed" is the word the high priest of the cult

used against her.

But, boss, if this

has something to do with supernatural,

how can we help her?

My dear guests, I am Mr. Roarke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

[♪♪]

Sister. Oh, I mean, Miss Hoyt,

I hope you’re enjoying yourself.

Yes, I am, thank you. Oh, I’m very glad.

I must admit I never expected

to find a shrine of St. Theresa here.

Ah, on Fantasy Island, many things are unexpected.

I’m beginning to believe that.

You see, in a way it’s only fitting

that she’d be here now. Oh?

When I was a little girl,

I read Theresa’s autobiography.

I think it was that more than anything else

that made me want to be a nun.

Really? Yes.

She was only 16 when she entered the convent.

And she was very frail,

so she knew she’d never be able to do things

like Joan of Arc or build churches.

So instead she offered herself

to the baby Jesus as his plaything.

Not an expensive toy that children

would be afraid to play with,

but something of no value like a toy ball.

Something he could throw to the ground

or kick with his foot

or leave in a corner and forget.

Or press to his heart.

I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to go on.

You must’ve come here to talk about my fantasy.

That is if it’s really possible.

Oh, it’s more than possible.

The young man you wrote me about

is already on the island.

You’ll meet him before the weekend is up.

That’s amazing.

I wasn’t even able to tell you his last name.

Well, when you told me his first name was Colin

and he had done veterinarian work at the convent farm,

it wasn’t too difficult to trace him.

Oh, you must be interested to know that,

he’s become quite noted in his field.

Zoos and animal preserves from all over the world

call on him as a consultant.

That’s wonderful. Yes.

Well, does he know about me?

Oh, no, no, no. It’s, uh, just as you asked.

He has no idea he’s involved in a fantasy.

[SIGHS AND CHUCKLES]

What? Did I say something funny?

No, it’s not you.

It’s just what you must think of me.

Well, the people who told me about you

said you’re a good man,

so I’d at least like for you to know

why I question my vocation after so long.

That’s not necessary.

You see,

I wanted to be just like Theresa.

Just to be a plaything for the child Jesus.

Something he could use or...

or leave alone.

But he... he never did.

Not in seven years was I able

to accomplish anything for him.

Don’t you see?

After that long of not being-- Being used,

you begin to wonder if God

really wanted you there at all.

And if maybe it isn’t time to start a new life.

I’m sorry.

Ah, Mr. Birdsong. Hmm? Oh, oh.

How are you, Mr. Roarke? Are you enjoying yourself?

Oh, I sure am. I’ve never seen

so many pretty girls in all my life.

Uh, when does my fantasy begin?

But your fantasy has already begun.

All these lovely young ladies

are finalists for the starring role in the movie.

They were selected from over 1000 candidates

from all over the world.

If you need an assistant,

I will be very pleased to do so.

Ah, Mr. Sid Gordon, your producer

and his assistant, Miss Jean Arden.

May I introduce-- You don’t have to tell me.

This is my new casting director.

Barney Birdsong.

Oh, Felix.

The name is Felix Birdsong.

Of course it is.

Uh, I’m sorry, I didn’t get your name.

Jean. Jean Arden.

Jean’s my exec secretary.

Consider her a loan to you whenever you need it.

Oh, thank you, Mr. Gordon.

Did you know I’ve seen every picture you ever produced?

Good boy.

Oh, here comes one of our potential backers.

Uh, Mr. Felix Birdsong, allow me to present

Mr. Hammerhead Harris.

Mr. Harris was wrestling champion of the world.

I got me a bundle to maybe invest

in this here moving picture.

Mr. Birdsong is the casting director I told you about.

The new breed of casting directors.

Not Hollywood jaded but fresh

from the heartland of America.

You folks won’t mind

if I borrow Felix for a few minutes?

Some more of my financial angels I want him to meet.

Oh, uh, gents,

I’d like you to meet my new casting director.

Felix, this is Sheikh Hameel Habib

and Big Billy Tidwick.

If you prove to be good at this,

perhaps we can do some business later.

I’m, uh, thinking of, uh, restocking my harem.

Oh. Oh, really?

Oh, well, sure. I’ll be glad to help.

Ladies and gents, your attention, please.

I’m proud to announce that Sid Gordon,

that’s me,

pulled off what that Diogenes dude couldn’t.

I found me an honest man.

And I now would like to present him to you.

My new casting director.

The man who’s gonna be choosing

the most beautiful girl in the world.

Felix Birdsong.

[APPLAUSE]

HIGH PRIEST [ON TV]: In the unity of unholy fellowship,

we praise and honor first Lucifer

and Beelzebub, Prince of Earth

and Angel of Destruction.

We call a dreadful minion

for the fulfillment of our desires

and destruction of our enemies.

Leviathan, beast of revelation.

Asmodeus, demon of lust and evolving might,

an invisible force of hell, my brothers and sisters,

which are consummately strengthened

in mind, body and will.

The celebrants of this black mass openly worship Satan,

whom they consider to be the real ruler of this world.

Like children, they ask the devil

to bless their self-indulgent whims

and to destroy their enemy.

Why they would accept the power

and promises of one who’s already been known

as the Prince of Liars is beyond me.

And who, if all the ancient writings are to be believed,

has always been most merciless

to those who serve him most faithfully.

This is Jane Garwood.

Lucifer’s Temple, San Francisco, California.

HIGH PRIEST: ...strange, full circles...

It’s very interesting.

TATTOO: But very scary.

After the program was aired, this high priest

was arrested and later convicted of fraud.

One night he phoned me. He ranted like a maniac.

Said I’d slandered them and their god

and that I’d pay for it.

[SCOFFS] I laughed at him until...

This was the first gentleman to suffer harm?

JANE: Yes, Jim. Jim Cowls.

We had just gotten engaged two weeks before the program.

The police said he jumped from his hotel window.

Then three months later, Paul Kendall,

my producer, he was killed.

His car went off the Big Sur Bridge.

We never even found his body.

I loved him too. Like my own brother.

He discovered me a couple of years ago

when I was just an ambitious secretary in the newsroom.

I see.

JANE: Burt Wynne.

He drowned four months ago while scuba diving.

I was willing to believe the first two were accidents

and I was beginning to like him seriously when...

Oh, what’s the use of talking about all of this.

I’m a jinx.

Everyone’s calling me that. That’s what I am.

Please, Miss Garwood, I can’t allow you

to judge yourself so harshly.

How much more proof do you need?

Three men are dead because of me.

Everyone I love or touch gets killed.

There are many things we cannot understand.

If it is some force of evil playing you,

then to stop it we must draw it out.

But how?

With a proper bait.

There is a man here on the island

who, starting this afternoon, will act as your suitor.

You see, he’ll take you dancing,

riding, moonlight strolls.

All you have to do

is pretend to fall in love with him.

But he would be placing himself in great danger.

Your fantasy was to find out if you are a jinx.

I know of no other way.

Who is this man?

I.

Oh, no, Mr. Roarke. I can’t allow you to do that.

Allow me? Miss Garwood, this is Fantasy Island.

My island.

And here I do what I think is best.

If you are ever to be rid of this...

curse, we must do this.

Trust me.

We give evil its greatest power through our belief in it.

All right.

Now, I suggest you go to your bungalow and unpack.

Stop and see the preparations

for the award ceremonies and then, uh...

I think it might be a nice day for a ride.

Thank you. Not at all.

Boss, I’m scared.

You’re setting yourself up to get killed.

Oh, Tattoo.

Don’t tell me you believe in the curse too.

I try not to, but what if something happens to you?

What will I do without you?

I appreciate the concern, my friend.

I’ll do my best to avoid undue danger.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Somebody can brief me later on the order of events, okay?

I’m going horseback riding.

Mr. Roarke said he’d show me the island.

See that?

New boyfriend already.

One more death and the TV ratings

will go right through the roof again.

No, no. Not that way, please.

Why not? Every place

has its dark secrets

and Fantasy Island is no exception.

Many, many years ago

some of the ancient tribes practiced witchcraft.

Perhaps even human sacrifice in that clearing.

Come. There are much more charming places

on the island to show you.

You are undoubtedly

the most comforting man I’ve ever known.

And I might add, if you like, handsome, charming...

And you are undoubtedly, I’m afraid, Miss Garwood,

a woman very gifted in the use of kind adjectives.

No, no. Oh, yes.

Oh, look.

JANE: Oh, he’s beautiful.

And he’s so tame.

Perhaps because he knows what you should.

On Fantasy Island, you have nothing to fear, Miss Garwood.

Nothing.

This’ll be your office.

Wow, it’s...

It’s kind of different, isn’t it?

Well, casting directors aren’t so subtle nowadays.

Besides, any starlet knows how the game is played.

Really? Um-hm.

Listen, maybe you ought to tell me...

well, you know, give me a few pointers, huh?

Honey, all you have to remember is you’re the casting director

with the power to make or break careers.

Yeah, guess that’s right.

[CHUCKLES]

You know, back home in Waukegan,

I go to at least five movies every week.

Sometimes twice in one day.

I’d give anything to be in showbiz.

Say, tell me about

some of the stars you’ve worked with.

You know, the real inside stuff?

Uh, Mr. Birdsong, Felix,

for this weekend, you are in showbiz.

Now why don’t you get yourself organized

and I’ll start funneling in the candidates, okay?

[CHILDREN CHATTERING]

Here, guys. Come on. Come on.

Come on.

[MARY GASPS]

Oh, oh, my gosh.

COLIN: Don’t be afraid.

She won’t harm you.

She’s just being very rude.

I mean, obviously what she wanted was your popcorn.

Naughty girl. Aren’t you ashamed of yourself?

Come on. Well, at least eat it over here.

Come on. I-I’m very sorry. I...

Come on, you stay here now.

You stay here.

Good girl.

I’m sorry she frightened you,

but she just seemed to get away from me.

She wouldn’t have harmed you.

Do you often take walks with gorillas?

Orangutan. Gertrude’s an orangutan.

There’s a big difference.

Her name wasn’t always Gertrude.

I renamed her after an old great-aunt of mine.

I see.

And the hat.

Did it come from your great-aunt too?

Oh, no. No. I bought that for her.

See, I’m a vet. Veterinarian.

And I sort of specialize in exotic animals.

Gertrude belonged to a zoo in Zurich.

Only after she lost her baby, she wouldn’t eat.

For a whole month. I mean, she was just pining away.

They were afraid she was gonna die.

They sent for me to see if I could help.

Well, she’s been with me ever since.

I bought her the hat, I thought

it’d make her feel better about herself.

Now she’s got a whole trunk full of them.

[LAUGHS]

And do they make her feel better?

Oh, yeah. She’s back to her normal weight.

And you ought to see her in front of a mirror.

She thinks she’s the hottest since Marilyn Monroe.

[LAUGHS]

How about dinner tonight?

Oh, well, um... Of course, if you’re here

with someone else...

No, I’m alone.

Well, then it’s only fair.

I mean, Gertrude did eat your popcorn.

And I understand they have a wonderful luau.

I could call for you at your bungalow.

I don’t know, um...

COLIN: I’ll leave my friend home.

I’ll pick you up at 7:30?

Okay. I’m in the Hibiscus bungalow.

Hibiscus. Okay, I’ll see you then.

Okay.

Come on, Gertrude.

We gotta get home and get washed up.

[GIBBERS]

I’m sorry. I don’t even know your name.

I’m, uh, I’m Mary. Mary Hoyt.

Hi, Mary. I’m Colin. Colin McArthur.

Come on.

I know.

Bobbi Jo Crandall.

Why, you look exactly like I expected,

Mr. Birdwhistle.

Song. Birdsong.

Oh. Oh, I do apologize.

Mispronouncing your name like that.

I hope you won’t hold it against me.

No, no. Not at all.

Uh, well, won’t you have a seat, please?

Where?

Just take my seat. Here. Here you go.

See?

[CLEARS THROAT]

Okay.

Uh, name?

Well, you already know that.

I’m Bobbi Jo.

Oh, sure you are. Right.

Uh...hometown?

Little Rock, Arkansas.

Born and bred.

Uh, talents?

Name?

Oh, got that.

"I know I was raised in the lap of luxury.

"I know I attended all the best schools

"and was voted debutante of the year.

"But that was all in the past.

"I’m simply not qualified to reign

as the most beautiful girl in the world, Harold."

Uh, ahem, that’ll do nicely.

Thank you. Thank you, Lisa.

Pretty bad, huh?

I was never very good at cold readings.

Improvisation’s what I do best.

Well, fine. Why don’t you improvise something then?

Okay. Um...

I’ll improvise the seduction of a Hollywood

casting director. Huh?

Felix, darling.

You are the only man in my humdrum life.

And I can’t wait.

Now, Felix.

Now is the time,

and this is the place.

REPORTER [ON TV]: Operation North Hammer is designed

to test NATO reaction time to a surprise attack

on the vulnerable European north bank.

This is Henry Carlson with the NATO forces

in West Baton, Germany.

Okay, then Henry accepts the commendation

for the news team and then the big casino,

Jane wins the golden mic and, Jane, will you please keep

your acceptance speech down to 45 minutes.

That goes for the rest of you too.

Would a simple thank-you be enough?

MARSH: Wonderful.

It will win our astonishment

and our undying gratitude.

Can we get out of here?

Isn’t this important to you?

Not as much as I thought it would be.

Jean, I need your signature on this.

Just take a second.

Sorry. That’s all right.

MAN: Look out!

[WOMAN SCREAMS]

Oh, no. It’s happening to you. The curse.

Nothing is happening to me, Miss Garwood.

It was nothing but a clumsy accident.

That’s all.

Mr. Roarke? You’re a very lucky man.

You were nearly number four.

[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

[LAUGHTER]

The trouble is that the lowlands

and the swampy forests of Borneo and Sumatra

where the orangutans come from are disappearing.

I mean if something isn’t done in 20 years,

’rangs will become extinct.

[KISS]

Ha.

Hm. Aren’t you the lucky one.

Hey, I certainly am.

Are you, um, glad you came?

Yes. But I almost changed my mind.

I was afraid that when you got back to your bungalow

you’d figure out that I sent Gertrude over to pester you.

Oh, no. Why did you do that?

’Cause you’re a very pretty lady,

and I thought it would be a good way to meet you.

Does that surprise you?

You’re blushing.

You know, I can’t figure you out.

All night long I’m trying to find out about you.

And you always manage to turn the conversation around

to where I’m talking about my animals.

How am I gonna find out who you are, mystery lady?

Is that so important now?

[APPLAUSE]

TATTOO: Attention. Attention.

Please, can I have your attention.

You have been watching

our beautiful ladies dance for you.

And now comes the highlight of our show

when they will teach you the Fantasy Island dance

to the three lucky men

who received the flower leis in the last dance.

[LAUGHS]

Please, a round of applause.

No, no. I can’t.

I don’t think she’s gonna take no for an answer.

I’ll teach you. Come on.

TATTOO: Now, gentlemen, line up, please,

and do as the girls do.

Music, please.

[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

SINGER: ♪ Oh, we’re going To a hukilau ♪

♪ Huki, huki, huki, huki Huki, hukilau ♪

♪ Everybody loves the hukilau ♪

♪ Where the lualau Is the kaukau at the hukilau ♪

♪ Oh, we throw our nets Out into the sea ♪

♪ And all the ’ama’ama Come a-swimmin’ to me ♪

♪ Oh we’re going To a hukilau ♪

♪ Huki, huki, huki, huki Huki, hukilau ♪

[MUSIC CONTINUES]

[SIGHS]

Well, I had a good time. [GIGGLES]

So did I. I’d like to see you again.

Uh, tomorrow morning I’ve got some things to do,

but I thought maybe in the afternoon we could,

you know, have a picnic or something.

I’d like that very much.

You know, it’s funny,

I-I came to this island to work.

I mean, everybody else comes here for fantasies.

And suddenly I walked right into one.

My own.

I’ll see you tomorrow.

Okay.

Oh, dear God, am I doing the right thing?

Ah, good evening, Tattoo.

Good evening, boss.

Still up?

Yes, I didn’t feel much like sleeping.

Oh.

Besides, I want to make sure that you got home okay.

Your concern is deeply appreciated.

That’s enough, my friend.

Cobra.

One of the deadliest snakes in the world.

Boss, it’s the Black Mass symbol.

Boss, it was meant to kill you.

Boss. Are you all right?

Do you know who it was?

Whoever it was

seems to know the island as well as we do.

You know, it’s really gonna be tough.

What? Choosing the most beautiful girl in the world?

Yeah.

You know if it was back in the ’30s,

I’d probably pick Madeleine Carroll.

Now there was a real beauty.

You’re really taking all this seriously, aren’t you?

Well, of course. It’s a big responsibility.

Well, that’s how they all start out.

Eager and naïve. What’s wrong with that?

Nothing. But it never lasts.

Morning.

Miss Arden. Mr. Birdsong.

Good morning, Tattoo.

What’s this? Champagne for breakfast.

We didn’t order any champagne.

Compliments of the three gentlemen over there.

JEAN: Ah-ha.

It begins with champagne

and ends with a brown paper bag full of money.

Are you implying that I’d sell out?

Don’t be ridiculous.

Well, fact: Hammerhead Harris

is sponsoring Miss Little Rock.

Fact: Big Billy Tidwell is sponsoring Miss Brooklyn.

And fact: Sheikh Habib over there

is sponsoring Miss Cancan, Gigi.

Now does that tell you anything?

I won’t be bought.

Oh, good morning, doll.

All set for the big event?

Not quite, Mr. Rat.

You’re using him, aren’t you?

Using who? What are you talking about?

That nice, sweet, naïve Felix Birdsong.

You’ve set him up as a patsy.

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Sid. I just came from your office

where I went through your personal files

and your personal set of books.

Now you’ve oversold the picture, Sid.

Fifty percent to Big Billy Tidwell.

Fifty percent to the oil sheikh,

and as far as I can figure out, about 120 percent

to that moron, Hammerhead Harris.

And you promised each and every one of them

that their girl would be the star.

All right. Hey, so they’ll get a little show at Birdsong.

So-- So what?

Uh, Sid. This is no small potato deal.

Felix could get hurt or worse.

Listen, doll,

how’d you like a nice boost in salary and a new title?

As of right now you’re raised 100 bucks a week,

and you’re associate producer on the film.

Aren’t I wonderful?

I should have made it 200 bucks a week.

Miss Garwood, can I talk to you for a second?

Of course, Tattoo. Come on in.

Here.

What’s this for?

It’s for you if you leave the island.

I’ve sold everything I have.

My car, my house...

to get that. If you need more,

not much more, I’ll try.

But Tattoo, why?

Miss Garwood, do you know what a Cobra is?

It’s a very deadly snake. It can kill in seconds.

Somebody put one and this

in the desk of my boss last night.

Oh. Oh, no.

Miss Garwood, before it’s too late, leave.

Don’t let him get hurt.

You love him too, don’t you, Tattoo?

Yes, I do.

Before I met Mr. Roarke,

I was nobody in the world.

People used to laugh at me.

Nobody took me seriously.

And when I met him,

I knew that he loved me more than anyone did.

He’s my friend.

I love him.

I would die for him.

Tattoo?

Would you care to tell me why you’re here?

Uh, he told me what happened last night.

Oh, I see.

I think you had better leave us now, my friend.

Boss, you’re not mad at me, are you?

Don’t blame him.

He loves you so much.

And if anything happened to you, I’d feel the same way.

You know, Tattoo is right. I’ve got to leave the island

before this curse kills you too.

ROARKE: Nonsense.

There was nothing supernatural about that snake

or whoever tried to run me down.

You have a choice.

You can run and let this person follow you and harass you,

or you can trust me.

Let me try to put an end to it here.

[LAUGHTER]

[♪♪]

It’s not much further.

We’d better be a little careful from here on.

She might be...

She might be a little testy around her cubs.

It’s all right, girl.

It’s all right.

Oh, she’s-- She’s beautiful.

Mr. Roarke raise her?

Her and three others.

She’s a white wolf.

An old Indian chief gave them to him to preserve.

Once they roamed the plain states by the thousands.

Now these and a handful of others are all that are left.

Come on, you’re gonna be all right, girl.

This may be the last time you see me.

Do you mind if I show your brood to a friend? Huh?

Oh. What was wrong with her?

She had a bad infection.

They thought she was gonna die.

What’s the matter?

No, uh, it’s just that someone recently died

that was very close to me.

I don’t know. I was thinking how wonderful

it must be to be able to give life back.

Well, sometimes nothing does any good.

But at least with your animals

you have the skill to try.

And when you’re through,

you can feel like you’ve done something.

The person who died must have been very special to you

for you to care so much.

I think I know how you feel.

Someone very close to me died recently also.

A nun in New Mexico.

She was maybe the finest person

I ever knew in my whole life.

It’s funny, I think she would’ve liked you.

Colin, hold me, please.

You know, it’s crazy.

I don’t know who you are or where you’re from.

If I didn’t know better,

I’d say I’m falling in love with you.

[BELLY DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

[MUSIC STOPS]

Thank you, Miss Dalton.

You’re an excellent dancer.

Oh, thank you.

I also do, um, tap, ballet...

I’ll remember that.

I’ll see you later at the big event.

Oh, good. Bye-bye. Thank you.

FELIX: Bye.

Well, there goes the last candidate.

Now the real work begins.

Deciding on a winner.

Just think, Jean,

in my hands I hold the futures of 20 girls

who want to be stars like Norma Shearer,

Bette Davis, Greta Garbo, Hepburn,

Colbert... Stop it.

Stop being such an ethical genuine 24-carat pigeon.

Pigeon? What do you mean?

Sid Gordon.

He’s using you, Felix.

He’s oversold the picture

and he’s promised the part to three different people.

And unless I missed my guess,

he’s not even gonna make this picture.

You mean the whole thing is a fake, a sham?

But how could Mr. Gordon do such a thing?

I mean, he’s one of the great producers of our time.

Didn’t you see Blossoms in the Snow?

One of the most sensitive pictures I ever saw.

Now, he produced that.

Oh, Felix.

That was a long time ago.

He’s made a dozen flops since then

and half of those are con jobs

where he swindled people out of money.

But he’s one of the best.

I just don’t see how Mr. Gordon could do such a thing.

Making movies is a public trust.

Miss Hoyt, I thought I might find you here.

Is everything okay?

Well, there have been

several urgent cables from the convent.

Is something wrong? No, no, it’s just that,

Mother Superior has said she must know

in the next 24 hours

whether or not you will take your final vows.

Mm. Yes.

My leave of absence will be over tomorrow.

Yes.

[SIGHS]

I guess there are a lot of decisions I have to make.

Colin has asked me to marry him.

I was just admiring your antiques.

What can I do for you, Mr. Marshall?

The point is, what can I do for you?

I beg your pardon? I believe you know

that you and your girlfriend are the talk of the island.

You mean Miss Garwood.

Will you come off it, Roarke.

I came here to warn you.

This curse business is nonsense.

It’s her. She’s the killer.

I see.

You don’t believe me.

Why do you dislike her so intensely, Mr. Marsh?

Mr. Roarke, this is Paul Kendall.

He was my friend.

We came up in the business together.

He was her producer.

He was a fine newsman till he met her.

And suddenly all he cared about was her career.

So he created her.

And then he died.

And you really believe she killed three men

to further her career?

If she picks up that award, she’ll be the biggest on TV.

People have killed for less than that.

I see.

Well, unfortunately, there is a very large flaw

in your theory, Mr. Marshall.

You see, Miss Garwood is determined to retire.

Oh, it’s true.

The press release was distributed an hour ago.

The award ceremony will be her last appearance ever

on television.

Now, if you will excuse me.

Of course I’ll excuse you, it’s...

I just hope your judgment is not so clouded

that you’ve fallen in love with her.

It’s an attraction that’s proved fatal

for three men already.

[♪♪]

Tattoo,

whatever happened to honesty is the best policy

and a man’s word is his bond?

Beats me.

You want to know something?

I’m never ever gonna go

to another movie as long as I live.

I’m even gonna give up popcorn.

Oh, Mr. Birdsong.

No, no, I-- I made up my mind.

You see,

all my life I wanted to be in showbiz.

[SNIFFS]

All that glamour and everything.

I wouldn’t be in it now

if Faye Dunaway walked in here

and got down on her knees and begged me.

Mr. Birdsong, I know how you feel.

But how would you like to get even with Mr. Gordon?

Oh, Tattoo. I’d give anything,

including a 1934 copy

of Photoplay in mint condition.

I’ve got an idea. But we’ve got to hurry.

The selection for the most beautiful girl in the world

starts in a few minutes.

Let’s go. Uh, can we stop off

and pick up my best friend Jean?

Of course. Come on. Let’s go.

But I don’t understand. Where are you taking me?

To my house where you will remain safely

while on this island. But I’m in no danger.

You are. I don’t think so.

Not anymore. You see, I am persuaded

your television career, your image,

is somehow the key to this curse.

To everything that’s happened.

And if I am right,

I’ve already set the trap with you as the bait.

Whoever is behind this alleged curse

will now come to this bungalow

looking for you.

How do you know that?

The three men who died.

Each was an impediment to your career, think about it.

With your announcement today of your retirement,

you will be the one final impediment.

Please get in.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

My private 747,

The Flying Carpet is en route here.

After Mademoiselle Gigi is named the winner,

I invite you all to a party at my Sahara Desert Oasis.

[LAUGHS]

Afternoon, Mr. Gordon. Everything under control?

Shh. Quiet.

[CHUCKLES]

[WHISPERS] It’s in the bag.

How do you feel?

Sober as a judge. Which you’re about to become.

Let’s just surprise Mr. Gordon,

since Tattoo’s gonna read the announcements.

[CHEERING]

Thank you, thank you. Welcome.

This afternoon, one lucky girl will be chosen

to star in the picture

The Most Beautiful Girl in the World.

The man who is gonna choose the lucky winner

is Mr. Birdsong.

[APPLAUSE]

Okay. Come on, give me your coffee.

[SIGHS]

Come on.

Thank you for your generous welcome.

You know, choosing the most beautiful girl in the world

hasn’t been easy.

They-- They say that, uh,

beauty is in the eye of the beholder.

And I believe that.

And with that thought in mind,

I have made my final decision.

Today’s winner,

the girl who is going to win $25,000

from Mr. Sid Gordon and his backers

and who will star in the film

The Most Beautiful Girl in the World

is...

number one through number 20.

I say all the girls are winners

and all of them get the prize money.

Twenty winners?

[EXCLAIMING]

At 25 grand apiece?

That’ll cost me $500,000.

It’s hot in there.

Thought I’d grab a breath of fresh air.

We wish to grab something also.

Let’s grab the infidel by the throat.

We got unfinished business.

How’d I do? Sensational.

Not even Sid Gordon can squirm his way out of this one.

[HAWAIIAN MUSIC PLAYING]

SINGERS: ♪ You’ll find me waiting ♪

♪ I’ll sing to you ♪

♪ My song of love ♪

♪ Will you take my heart... ♪

I’ve been looking for you everywhere.

We were supposed to meet two hours ago.

I’m sorry. I, uh, I had a lot of thinking to do.

About us?

Colin, last night you asked me who I am,

where I’m from

and why I came to Fantasy Island.

Mm-hm.

I came here for you.

For me?

We never even met.

Yes, we have. You just don’t remember.

It was more than four years ago.

You came out to the farm to take care of our animals

and Sister Margaret introduced you to all of us

and you told some really funny stories

and you made us laugh.

You were so gentle with the animals.

You were a nun.

Yeah, I still am...

Until tomorrow.

That’s when I have to decide whether or not

to take my final vows.

And?

There’s nothing for me there anymore.

Can you be so sure?

Mm-hm.

When I first entered the convent,

I wanted to be just like St. Theresa.

The toy ball.

You know the story?

Of course you would. You knew Sister Margaret.

Well, anyway, it...

It just didn’t work out for me.

The baby Jesus never used me.

In all those years, I was left untouched.

Even when Sister Margaret was dying of cancer

and she was only 35...

couldn’t he have even heard me then?

You’re Sister Mary Theresa.

Yeah, that was my name.

[SIGHS]

I’m sorry, I...

I don’t mean to go on.

It-- It’s just that it’s important to me

that you know who I am... or was.

And I’m not bitter.

I realize now that God

has something else in mind for me.

Maybe marrying you.

Do you love me?

I know I can.

I know you’re a good man,

and I feel inside that I could be a good wife to you.

And I’ll try, I’ll try real hard like...

Just like I did for the toy ball.

[CHUCKLES]

Well, I feel so foolish.

So alone.

Don’t.

I’ll be at the bridge tomorrow if you want to see me.

And if you don’t, I’ll understand.

SINGER: ♪ ...we’ll be as one ♪

♪ Forever more... ♪

[SONG ENDS]

Anything yet?

Quiet as a cemetery, Mr. Roarke.

I don’t like this, Tattoo. Something is wrong.

What’s happening?

Nothing. That’s just it.

It’s perfectly quiet.

I was certain the announcement of Miss Garwood’s retirement

would force him to make a move.

Him who?

The one responsible for...

the curse.

And if I’m not mistaken,

someone who’s come onto our island...

uninvited.

Come. We better make a phone call.

I want to make sure Miss Garwood is safe.

[PHONE RINGS]

[PHONE RINGS]

Yes. ROARKE: Miss Garwood?

Oh, it’s you. You had me worried.

Is everything all right?

Yes. Perfectly. What about you?

Oh, it’s been absolutely quiet.

I’m getting so bored that I don’t think--

[DOOR CLOSES]

[SCREAMS]

What happened, boss? I don’t know.

Where are we going, boss?

You are staying here, my friend.

Out of danger.

I’m going on a hunch,

which I better be right.

[TIRES SQUEAL]

In the unity of unholy fellowship,

we praise and honor first Lucifer and Beelzebub,

Prince of Earth, Angel of Destruction.

We call thy dreadful minion

for the fulfillment of our desires

and the destruction of our enemies.

Hail to thee Black Prince.

From the grotto whose charge we bear.

Hail to thee and to thy father’s within

whose feigned our laughs and screams in terror

and in merriment, in fear and in ecstasy.

In loneliness and in anger upon the whim of thy will.

Hail Prince of the Abyss.

In thy name let us behold the father.

Let the old one who raineth upon the world of horrors

come and speak with us.

For we would again strengthen the bond

that liveth within the dark angels.

Hail Father of the World of Horrors.

Hail Father of the Hornless Ones.

Hail Ram of the Sun and the Deathless One

who sleepeth not while thy horror

and thy name and thy father liveth.

I am that I am through the dark angels

that I speak and the hornless ones

and I pledge onto you the bonds of the demons

through whose will this world has come to be.

Let us speak the bond of the nine dark angels.

Hail father and Lord of Dark Angels.

Master of the Universe,

from whom we receive all strength...

You see?

Nothing supernatural.

Only a man in a black robe.

Human hands holding a snake.

Dangerous, deadly.

But hardly spiritual.

PRIEST: ...Prince of the Abyss,

in thy name let us behold the father.

That the old one who raineth down

the world of horrors come and speak with us.

Let the sea look--

Paul!

Yes. Paul Kendall.

The man who arranged the black mass.

The one man whose body was never found.

Too late.

No one can save him now.

I can’t believe it.

Why would Paul Kendall want to kill me?

Because he created you.

He created your television image.

So any threat to that image had to be destroyed.

Don’t you see, your fiancées, myself...

he feared being caught

so he staged his own death.

But if he tried to kill me,

wouldn’t he be killing that precious image too?

You had already done that today

when you announced your retirement.

At least you guys are still with me.

Here.

Colin.

Thought I’d buy Gertrude a bag of her own today.

Here, Gertrude.

I didn’t come to marry you, Mary.

I-- I don’t think I could stand the competition.

What do you mean?

Oh, just about people and emotion.

The way things happen like people we love dying

and how it turns your whole head around and confuses you.

But I’m not confused.

Sister Margaret was a saint.

Yes, but you said you were never used.

That in all the years in the convent, you did no good.

That’s right. It’s true.

Is it?

You know when I got back from Tanzania.

Among the mail waiting for me

was a letter from Sister Margaret.

She must have written it

just a few days before she died.

I’d like you to hear part of it.

"The pain gets worse every day now.

"Outside I can hear the children playing

"and I want to cry to be with them.

"I know I’m being tested now.

"The pain, pain...

"and every day I thank God

"for Sister Mary Theresa.

"I would have gone mad by now

"if not for her.

"Denounced my life,

"my vows, my God.

"But she’s always there like the original Theresa.

"Always kind and sweet in taking care of me.

"The other sisters tell me

"she’s held the whole school together

"just by being herself.

"Her simple devotion.

"No great cathedrals or hospitals or anything

"can match the greatest gift which she gives us all.

Her love and goodness."

May I please have my ball back?

Time to throw it back, Sister.

He needs to use it.

Thank you.

Oh, Miss Garwood, I’m so happy you won the award.

Oh, thank you, Tattoo.

I just wanted to stop and say goodbye.

I’m glad you did.

Have you decided what you will do now?

No, but I’m going to take a leave and think about it.

I see.

I suppose it’s safe now,

if anyone wants to care for me.

Care for you?

The Spaniards have a proverb.

Well, actually they have a proverb to fit any situation,

but this one says

that you can want a woman for her body

but you can only love her for her character.

I think many men would want to love you, Miss Garwood.

Thank you, gentlemen, for a wonderful experience.

You are most welcome, Miss Arden.

And what about you, Mr. Birdsong?

Was the fantasy worth it?

You know, I was just wondering the same thing

until a few minutes ago.

What happened?

I called my brother who runs the accounting department

in Monument Pictures.

And?

Well, he offered me a full-time job

working in the accounting department.

Don’t you see, Mr. Roarke?

As of tomorrow morning I really will be in showbiz.

Oh, congratulations, Mr. Birdsong.

Thank you so much.

Goodbye. Goodbye.

Goodbye. Goodbye, Miss Arden.

Well, Sister, I see you’ve made your decision.

I hope we were of some assistance.

Oh, yes, Mr. Roarke. More than you’ll ever know.

I realize now that I’ve been living

my real fantasy all along.

Thank you very much.

You’re very welcome, Sister.

Goodbye.

Goodbye. Bye-bye.

Bye.

Oh, uh, Tattoo, uh, the money you tried

to, uh, give Miss Garwood, she returned it to me.

I don’t care. Now that I sold my horse and my car...

Well, as a matter of fact...

I bought them back.

Boss! Oh, thank you very much.

Yes, the gentleman insisted on $1200.

Twelve hundred dollars?

Yes.

But he only gave me $1000.

Well, it seems he has a rule.

He buys low and sells high.

Boss, I’m sorry.

Every time I try do something, I cost you money.

Tattoo, I consider a dear true friendship

such as ours beyond any price.

Thank you, boss. Thank you very much.

[♪♪]

[♪♪]