Original subtitles

No. Please.

This is just a minimum-wage job, I swear.

No! No!

Hey-a, folks.

It's me, Fizzarolli.

You probably already know me from all the sex bots and merchandise,

but now that I'm no longer a spokesman for Mammon,

I'm free to make my own content!

So, get ready to see a whole lot more of me doing me.

Uh, but not, like, in the porn way.

I mean, not-not yet anyway.

W-We'll see how this goes.

Welcome to my first ever slime tutorial

where I teach you silly fuckers how to make real authentic slime.

For what purpose, you ask? Beats me.

But it's popular, apparently.

All righty. Uh, now...

Uh... hmm.

Okay, so, I don't know how to make slime,

so this time, I'm gonna just talk while eating a shit ton of food.

So, here we got every kind of burger made in the Gluttony Ring.

Sponsored by Queen Bee herself.

So... uh, a-a lot of you are asking

if Mammon was, like, a good boss,

and, like, I don't know, do you think,

like, a giant pile of shit is a good boss?

Welcome back to "Fizzy's True Crime Corner," you guys,

where I teach you how to do some sexy clown mascara

and tell you about the latest fucked-up shit happening 'round town.

Today's story is about how imp bodies keep popping up all over the Greed Ring.

Nobody knows whodunnit,

but they are all found mutilated with their skin torn off

and nowhere to be found... Ozzie!

Not now! I'm shooting a video

and I'm not even finished with my eyeliner.

Doesn't it look great?

It looks, uh, amazing, baby doll.

But, um, you know you've been filming these videos for a few days straight.

Maybe it's time to take a break.

No! I still don't have the right take yet,

and I still haven't finished my makeup.

How can I do makeup and talk about people's gruesome murders

when you keep coming in to check on me and ask if I'm okay?

I'm great!

Why don't you just sit down,

stop working for a little bit, watch some TV.

Relax.

You don't always have to be doing something.

Are you sure?

'Cause I sure know a-something I'd like to be doing

that would r-r-relax me.

Sex.

Oh, you know there's nothing I'd love to do more, my little sex kitten,

but I have a meeting, remember?

So, you're allowed to work, but not me?

How is that fair, Oz?

You know that's not what's going on.

Sure feels like it.

Look, Satan is up my ass right now

about my reputation and...

"Dumbass reckless behavior."

He's got Mammon

crying in his ear

about how you spat on his kindness

and made him look like a fool.

He really said that?

Mm-hmm. He's full of shit and we both know it.

But Satan still buys into that crap.

Which means I need to show up

to every stupid meeting he summons me for and make him happy,

'cause knowing him, this could get bad.

Maybe it's just a good time to ease up on yourself, you know?

Keep our heads down?

You've gone from working constantly, being in the spotlight constantly,

to having freedom for the first time in 15 years.

You should use it

to have a real break.

Do you hear me, Fizzy Frog?

A real break.

You still have the club and...

Oh! Oh, oh, oh, oh.

What if for tonight's show, we do a giant choreographed silk dance routine?

I can teach the dancers how to juggle knives while in the air...

-Uh, uh, uh, uh... -and then I take off my pants...

No, no, no. You-you know the club is closed, Froggie.

The club is closed tonight. You know that.

Fuck me!

Later. Boop.

In the meantime, why don't you go out with the club crew?

Or with a friend. Have a "treat yourself" day.

You deserve it.

And then, when I'm back home,

I can do that thing you like.

Oh...

Growl.

Growl, growl.

-Growl for me, baby. -Growl.

G-R-O-W...

L-L-L-L-L-L-L-L...

Oh, when you spell it,

-now, that is sexy as fuck. -Mm-hmm.

I'm listening. I'm listening.

-Can I ask one question? -Yeah, sure.

-Which thing are you talking about? -Oh.

The thing, uh, with the rubber chicken.

Oh.

Can I wear my egg costume?

-Yeah... maybe. -Oh, okay.

Hmm. Ugh.

Okay, I got to go.

But treat yourself today. You hear me?

Treat yourself,

so tonight I can treat you.

-Love you, baby doll. -Oh, God, I'm already coming.

Hey, bitch.

Barbie, babe, I'm bored.

Ozzie said I need to take a break. Want to hang?

I would, but I'm, like, tits-deep in job hunt bullshit.

You know, I've done, like, four interviews today,

and not one lets slide that I got a human killed on my last job.

It's just one shitty human. The fuck is that about?

Hey, you know, I can always put in a good word for you at Ozzie's.

Nah, that place is overflowing with booze. Can't risk it.

Why don't you call my dumb-fuck brother to satisfy your boredom?

I heard you guys were all cool now.

Ouch. Barb, come on.

What's that?

You're breaking up.

I can't...

Click.

Love that bitch.

Eh, fuck it.

Hey, h-hey! Blitz-no-O!

Get in, loser.

Fizz? What the fuck?

Get in the car! Beep, beep!

Christ in heat, Fizz, did you learn to drive at drunk school?

Oh, Ozzie doesn't let me drive, because I "don't have a license."

But Ozzie isn't here, is he?

Buckle up, Buckzo.

Oh, yeah, that's Sergio.

Hi, Sergio.

Oz isn't letting me out without a bodyguard.

Don't worry, though. He won't get in the way.

I haven't even heard him talk.

Never heard him talk.

Thanks for, uh, inviting me out.

-Kind of needed it. -Oh, totally.

You were my first choice.

Yeah, it's been, um...

Well, kind of shitty since...

Well, uh, how... uh, what have you been up to,

ever since quitting the whole Mammon thing?

I heard he's been playing the victim card pretty hard...

Whoa, I love this song!

-Whoo! -♪ I don't need to be ♪

Yeah! ♪ Nobody's bay-bay...

Together now, let's go!

-♪ I'm gonna... -♪ I'm gonna be... Yeah!

-♪ Driving... Turn it up. -Watch out for that car!

♪ I'm finally free ♪

♪ I'm just doing me ♪

♪ 'Cause I don't need to be...

-What, what? -♪ Nobody's bay-bay-bay-bay...

You know where we should go?

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay...

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

Loo Loo Land?

Why here?

Haven't you had enough of this place? I-I know I have.

Especially after the last time I visited, when I burnt the whole park down.

That was you?

Of course it was.

You're lucky I don't have to sue you anymore.

It's fine.

I hate this place. Let's sneak in and fuck it up.

You know, like when we were kids.

Fizz, I know you can stretch.

-I've seen it. -That's cheating.

I'm trying to go old-school.

Juvenile delinquent style.

Okay, bozo.

Come on, Fizz.

Ta-da! Oh, shit, Fizz, are-are you okay?

Oh, yeah, I'm fine.

Let's go! Whoo!

Fuck you, Mammon.

Fuck your dumb green circus.

So, how are things,

you know, with the, uh, that big, uh, chicken you're fucking?

Oh, they're great.

He's w-worried about me.

-Worried? -Yeah, I mean...

I used to be constantly working.

Photo shoots, promotion,

meetings for new brands or, like,

rehearsals over and over.

Then the club every night.

Now half my day is gone, and most of my purpose.

I guess I don't know what to do with myself.

I've tried just being hornier,

but right now, Ozzie is too busy calming Satan's tits for that.

Oh, wow, too horny for Asmodeus?

Not too horny, just...

Too often, I guess?

Plus, sex out of boredom results in some weird shit.

I... Yeah, that's true.

You know, it's kind of creepy in here.

Don't worry, you're a clown.

You're already the creepiest thing in this place.

Hey, don't worry. I'll protect you.

-Again. -Shut up.

-Dickhead. -What?

-Am I wrong? -No.

But you don't have to say it.

I guess that's what makes it feel like old times, though, huh?

Yeah, it does.

Hey, didn't you work here at one point?

Oh.

Yeah. I did.

And, you know, i-it was weird,

-seeing you all over the place. -I bet.

This was the first project Mammon used me for.

Lots of promo, and the first ever Robo Fizz.

Oh, I know.

Hey, genuine question here.

Did you actually program that thing to hate me?

Well...

Ha! Um...

Oh, he did.

Who's there? You better fuck off.

I, uh, I-I think we should go.

Yeah, here, stay behind me.

Aww, leaving so soon?

I thought you were having fun.

Whoa!

Huh?

Sergio!

Oh! Fuck! Blitzo!

What's wrong? Fizz!

Blitzo, we have to go!

Fuck, fuck...

Come on, come on.

Come on, come on, come on.

Shit!

Fizz, behind you.

Huh?

Blitzo? Blitzo?

Where are you? Blitzo?

So, you two are friends again?

-How cute. -Who said that?

What did you do to him?

Hmm, nothing yet.

But the night's pretty young.

Blitzo. Please don't hurt him. What do you want?

What do I want?

Hmm. I'll let you guess.

Holy fuck!

Oh, my fucking...

Oh, what the fuck? Oh, my...

-Fuck! -Anything?

I'll give you three.

Fucking fuck, holy Satan.

Fuck, oh, Satan, you almost stabbed him. Fuck.

-Are you done? -Fuck! What?

Those are bodies. You're killing fucking bodies.

Fuck! Fuck!

Okay, enough of that.

Kind of ruining this for me.

Now shut the fuck up before I tear your jaw from your face.

Like that guy.

Gonna keep that trap shut?

You.

You're the one k-killing imps, skinning them.

He has eyes, ladies and gentlemen.

Yes, it's me.

And I must say,

I never, in a million years,

would have imagined you, of all imps,

would wander right to me.

The one and only Fizzarolli.

The perfect skin to complete my transformation.

Or, well, I wouldn't say "perfect."

Don't you fucking dare!

It's me you want, right?

You glorified vibrator!

Why don't you deal with me, or you scared

I'll blast out your other eye?

Don't worry, honey. He'll get to you.

Fuck...

-What the f... -Oh, him?

He's Mammon's latest model.

My replacement.

That is, before you decided to quit

and he decided he didn't care to fix the place.

Poor little me.

I didn't get to entertain one kid.

Boo.

Look, I-I don't know what you want from us.

But I-I can, I can help you.

Do you need a new body? O-Ozzie can make you one. I...

I don't need Asmodeus to make me a new body,

because I don't want a fake body.

I want a real body.

I want real skin.

Real imp skin.

'Cause I'm becoming a real you.

What the who daddy now?

-Did I stutter? -You really think

that skinning me will make you the real me?

Yes, that's how it works. Hundred percent.

-Okay, that's stupid. -You're stupid.

Could a stupid person do this?

♪ Now, hey, there, old chum, what's got you looking glum? ♪

♪ Is it 'cause you see I'm everything you ain't? ♪

♪ Show off at Ozzie's, quit on Mammon ♪

♪ so if I should examine your affairs? ♪

♪ Well, they frankly ain't that great ♪

♪ I won't be selling out 'cause I know I'll be selling out ♪

♪ the shows that give me all the adoration I demand ♪

♪ It isn't like the circus 'cause now I have a purpose ♪

♪ and it's to be the showman that he couldn't be ♪

♪ and fill these stands ♪

♪ Poor little Fizzy, look at how I took your place ♪

♪ But who can really blame me when your life is a disgrace? ♪

♪ Come one, come all, it's the Fizzarolli ball ♪

♪ where the creatures of the dark gather answering the call ♪

♪ For a show that knocks the baddest and the meanest off their feet ♪

♪ Watch and learn, my captive audience, I'll give you all a treat ♪

♪ Rebuilt, reborn from the fires of the scorned ♪

♪ I'm the only one that matters now, don't say that you weren't warned ♪

♪ Been living in your shadow, I don't let it keep me down ♪

♪ 'cause now I am the ringleader ♪

♪ and you're the clown ♪

♪ Stop, I'm not gonna enable a machine ♪

♪ that's gone unstable ♪

♪ The feeble shitty tantrums of a fraud ♪

-♪ Uh-oh ♪ -♪ You act a part and steal faces ♪

♪ to try and take my place ♪

♪ It's a pale imitation, nothing more ♪

-♪ Oh, my ♪ -♪ I don't hide what I am ♪

♪ I know exactly who I am ♪

♪ I am an entertainer who's above where he began ♪

♪ No longer in the circus, a lord has gave me purpose ♪

♪ and with him, I have got the only thing ♪

♪ you'll never understand ♪

♪ Check this sappy jester with a rep he must defend ♪

♪ but you know how the saying goes, all good things got to end ♪

♪ Come one, come all, it's the Fizzarolli ball ♪

♪ where the creatures of the dark gather answering the call ♪

♪ for a show that's gonna make the masses sing and shriek and shout ♪

♪ They'll hang on to every fucking word ♪

♪ there's never any doubt ♪

♪ Rebuilt, reborn from the fires of the scorned ♪

♪ I'm the only one that matters now ♪

♪ don't say that you weren't warned ♪

♪ You tried to kill me once but I came back to see the dawn ♪

♪ And that makes me the ringleader ♪

♪ and now you're gone ♪

♪ You might have had it rough from the silly games you played ♪

♪ but imagine our surprise when you threw this all away ♪

♪ What you were to the people, now it's buried in the past ♪

♪ Do you protest after humiliating yourself? ♪

♪ Ha, that's a good laugh ♪

♪ Are you jealous that you don't have what we've got? ♪

♪ Do you hate that we're the best of you and everything you're not? ♪

♪ A powerhouse of stardom, always down to have some fun ♪

♪ Not ashamed of what we're meant to do ♪

♪ while all you do is run ♪

♪ So, sit there all exhausted and keep that whiny tone ♪

♪ but it don't matter what you do now, I am on your throne ♪

♪ Come one, come all, it's the Fizzarolli ball ♪

♪ where the creatures of the dark gather answering the call ♪

♪ for a show that keeps 'em coming back here every single night ♪

♪ And the crowd is gonna beg for me with my name up in lights ♪

♪ Rebuilt, reborn from the fires of the scorned ♪

♪ I'm the only one that matters now ♪

♪ don't say that you weren't warned ♪

♪ Across the Rings you'll see my face ♪

♪ the baddest imp in town ♪

♪ 'Cause now I am the ringleader ♪

♪ and you're the clown ♪

"Mustn't"?

The fuck?

Sit tight for me.

Okay, V1?

Motherfucker.

That the best you got?

Huh?

Not so cocky now, hmm?

Just let him go.

Hmm.

Nah, not gonna happen.

But I'll tell you what.

I like it when they run, so I'll give you a head start.

One.

Two.

-Three. -Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit.

Four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.

Yas, king. Werk.

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit.

Shit. Shit.

Five Nights of Fuck Me!

I wouldn't bother.

Those cuffs are magnetic,

made to work on the Robo Fizzes.

Did you know Ozzie made those? Hmm?

Did you know he made shit that only works on us?

As if the whole programmed obedience thing wasn't enough.

Or do you just not think about us?

No, not the face! I'm the pretty one.

Well, that was easy.

Hey. Loona. Blitzo is my dad.

Big fan of the "True Crime Corner."

There's another "me" going after Blitzo.

I'm on it.

You really aren't much of a badass without your silly fire power.

Hmm.

And no snarky comeback? Wow.

You're kind of pathetic.

Ah! Fuck!

Oh, fuck.

Y-You know, the real Fizz hates blood,

so you're really being off-brand right now.

I never liked you.

Even without the programming,

you always were a jealous little piss baby

who treated me like the shitty ex-boyfriend you never had.

Did you want to fuck him?

Is that it? Did I remind you of that?

-Fuck you! -I knew it.

Surprise, motherfucker!

Loona! No!

Sorry, using a little pet to beat me

ain't gonna work a second time, idiot.

Now let's find your off switch.

Oh, oh! Look who might be 20% less of a little bitch than I thought.

Go fuck yourself.

Run, rabbit! Run!

-D-Dad. -It's okay, sweetie.

Y-You're gonna be okay, I promise.

You are such a nothing.

You are done.

I am the future.

It's my time as the one and only.

I'm doing you a favor

by ending your miserable little washed-up life.

Now your stupid fleshy body is rotting away,

and he won't fix you.

You're nothing without Mammon.

You might as well just kill yourself.

I'm about to.

I'm still the one and only, bitch!

Fizz. Help.

Oh, shit.

Where are you?

Did...

Did I fuck it up?

Dad. Dad, it hurts.

Fuck, it hurts so bad.

I know, I know, I know, honey. H-Hold on, we're almost there.

Fizz? Hurry!

C-Careful with...

Thanks.

-Ah, whoa, whoa, whoa. -Ugh, ow, that hurts.

-Careful. -Fuck.

G-G-Gentle. Gently.

They'll get her to Sloth. Don't worry.

A wound like this will be easy to heal.

I have the top doctors on it.

Are you both okay?

Yeah. I'm fine.

You should've seen me, Oz.

I was totally taking care of myself this time.

Kicked his ass, hardly even cried, totally handled it...

I'm fainting. Catch me, daddy.

Oh. Oh.

I can take you to Sloth.

No, I can get there. Thank you, though.

Just take care of Fizz.

Yeah.

-What the...? -Rise and shine, fucker.

What the fuck are you doing with me, you freak?

I don't know yet.

All I know is I'm going through some shit,

and you hurt my fucking daughter.

So tell me, cocksucker,

you ever been an unhealthy coping mechanism before?

Fuck.

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ Bay-bay, bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ You're such a doofus cliché ♪

♪ You say you're leaving and you beg me to stay ♪

-♪ Bay-bay ♪ -♪ Feels like I'm losing my head ♪

♪ Losing my head ♪

♪ You disappear and then you're back from the dead ♪

♪ All of this time, wanting you to be mine ♪

♪ But now I can finally see ♪

♪ I don't need to be nobody's bay-bay ♪

♪ No one gonna be driving me cray-cray ♪

-♪ I'm finally free ♪ -♪ I'm just doing me ♪

-♪ Just doing me ♪ -♪ 'Cause I don't need ♪

-♪ to be ♪ -♪ Nobody, nobody ♪

-♪ Nobody ♪ -♪ nobody's ♪

-♪ bay-bay-bay-bay ♪ -♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪

♪ Bay-bay-bay-bay ♪