Original subtitles

Glory be to God.

I must be a powerful captain to cause a thing like this to happen.

I'll never cook another dinner at Candy McLean!

Aye, aye, sir!

We'll sing you a song of the captain we follow.

Dick Scratch is his name, and he ain't no Apollo.

But a pirate is he, like none there has been.

From old Long John Silver to young Errol Flynn.

Far did I know, far did I see, old Scratch.

is the man for me.

Though storms and typhoons and tornadoes may happen, we

loyally serve under Scratcher as captain. Whatever

occurs, he's cheerful all day in his morbidly

miserable, bad-tempered way.

Why we chose the sea.

Years have gone by while we searched for the treasure.

Our food has run out.

And to add to our pleasure, we're totally lost.

No idea where we'd be.

Cause like the song says, all we see is the sea.

Bye little Ido.

Bye little Idy.

We're lost.

On the rolling sea.

On the rolling sea.

Kipper on the cardboard cow.

Nor find you west half past three.

Nobody wears half-past three!

What about some ready food?

Food!

Yes! What about some food?

All right then, what about some food?

I tell you, it's one of the Greek islands. No, no, no, no, no. That is

impossible. Impossible, Captain.

Look, is he trying to tell me, Dick Scratcher, poor dumb blur, how to navel

gate now? No, no, no, my Captain, but this is not a Greek island.

I tell you, this is definitely one of the Greek islands, and furthermore, look

there, there's a Greek lad on the shore.

Ahoy there, Greek lad on the shore!

Say to him hello in... You speak the Greek. Say to him hello in the Greek.

Yasu?

Ah, he's deaf.

A lot of them Greeks goes deaf young. I know that personally.

What language is it you're speaking, sir?

He's talking to a native Greek, you higgering little swine.

Well, this is not Greece, sir.

This is Ireland.

God bless all here, lads. God bless all here. I'm descended from the kings, you

know. Oh, I didn't know that. Oh, Brian Burrow and the House of Tara.

Ah, me native island.

I love it. Oh, look at that. That's all Irish.

It's all... Oh, come here, darling little Greek lad. Come here, little

Greek lad. Look at this idiot.

He navigates like he cooks.

Me and me lads.

We need the food. Food. You got the food?

Food, sir? Yes, food.

Food! Just stop what goes in here.

Right, well, I'll take you to the village inn.

It's his mother who cooks there. But it's only humble fare.

As the vale of Kilkenny, where the bright waters meet,

All the last rays of feeling and life must

depart,

Ere the bloom of my Ireland shall fade from my

eyes.

Here's your food, sir.

Right,

lads. Let's get out of here.

I think it is some kind of foreign competition.

On behalf of me and my crew, I'm anxious.

You're very welcome.

Ah!

The sword!

I spilled the sword!

That's bad luck, isn't it?

It's bad luck, spilling the sword.

I spilled that sword.

That's a bad look. No, that's a... There is no bad look in this house, Captain.

No, no, not now. Will you give us a hand with that?

What about the aisle then?

Come here.

Lads, let's drink a toast to this fine lady.

What a beautiful house.

No, no, no.

But will you drink to my son here, Jeremiah?

For on the stroke of midnight, he'll be 14.

Was he born in the middle or the end of the midnight?

Right in the middle.

His head in Sunday, his body and legs in Monday.

Just like me old shipmate, Billy Bombay.

Greatest ghost he spotted that ever breathed.

Jerry Moyer, you have the power of seeing the ghosts.

Me?

See ghosts?

Go on, I don't believe you.

Take me to the graveyard at midnight, and I'll prove it to you.

This lad can see ghosts.

He'll see the ghost he harassed Muhammad, and that'll lead us to the

treasure.

Captain, this sounds crazy.

Do you not believe in ghosts?

No. Oh, well, then you'll never see one.

What place is this?

The graveyard of St. Patrick.

Oh, he must have been a right big fella.

They must have had to cut him up in bits to get him in here.

Jeremiah, let's sit here and wait for the witching hour.

Are you sure I have the gift to see ghosties?

To be sure you have.

And Jeremiah, if you see the ghostie which I'm looking for, then I'll give

you one of these. Look.

That's the strangest sounding clock I ever heard.

There must be the spirits of the dead.

Can you see a ghost here, Jeremiah?

Can you see one?

Yes.

There's one now.

God bless all here.

Jesus Mary and Joseph.

Oh, where?

Is he a pirate?

No.

That's the ghost of my dear grandfather.

Oh, no. That's the wrong ghost.

Try and see another one. Try and see a pirate ghost.

Oh, I'm never coming to the island again.

Oh, never.

Who's that?

It's the boy I brought with you.

What's his name? Jerry Meyer.

Oh, that's the one.

Tie him up. Did he see the ghosts?

Oh, he saw the ghosts.

Better than Bill Bob Bay.

Tie him up and get him aboard.

Aye, aye. Come on.

Come on.

Oh,

we'll all be murdered in our graves.

Awful.

Your cock.

Watch this cock, huh?

Where are you?

Who's there?

Who is in there?

Jeremiah?

What are you doing here?

Who did this to you?

Who did this to you? You tell me.

Scratcher did this to you? Wait till I get him. I'll murder him.

You come with me. You, you, you come with me. I don't know what you are doing

here, but we go see Scratcher.

Come on, up the steps.

Come on.

Come on.

Up you go.

We go see Scratcher, eh?

Scratcher? Captain is Scratch.

Don't come in.

I found this little boy bound and gagged a stowaway. A stowaway on this boat?

Oh, you're a naughty little boy.

You're a naughty boy.

Naughty, naughty, naughty.

I

want

to be put ashore. I've been kidnapped.

Kidnapped? But you're only a kid.

Did you see the villains?

No, it was dark.

You sure you're telling the truth, lad?

I demand to be put ashore!

You what? I demand to be put ashore.

Well, I'll say one thing for you. You've got spirit like me old friend Billy

Bombay. And I promise you one thing on me, Honour. As soon as I seize the land,

you'll be put ashore.

Keep ahead!

Defug! Get that boy below!

I can't take any more boarders with pull-up.

Ready, boy. Come about.

Hose ready.

Lower. Hose.

Look, I will pretend to be the captain, but you must keep your mouth quiet.

All right.

But don't you go forgetting now that I'm the real captain on here.

Yes, sir.

I have a beautiful idea.

Welcome aboard our humble ship.

Excuse me, sir, what is that smell?

It is him.

Oh, yes, of course.

Parsley, Frank, sir. R.N.

His Majesty's ship, Fidius Albion.

Pirates went ashore on the Irish coast, sir, and kidnapped a young lad. We

believe that the ship that took him belonged to the Bay of Algiers.

But we are peaceful Portuguese fishermen.

I, um, I don't see any fish, sir.

Ah, that's because they're all in the sea.

And who says we Portuguese fishermen do not have a sense of humour, eh?

Practically everybody, sir.

Oh. However, sir.

If you are innocent, you will be protected by England as she protects our

Empire, His Majesty's Royal Navy, where'er she may go.

Possibly and categorically.

Excuse me, sir.

What are those spots, those red spots upon your face, sir?

It is nothing. It is the crot. That is just the crot. Well, I think that clears

that one up very satisfactorily, sir. Thank you.

I'll continue with my search. What exactly is the crud? Oh, the crud.

It is a tiny epidemic called the red plague.

Oh, yes, the red plague. Yes, good, excellent. That's very good. Fine. The

red plague.

The red plague, sir.

The red plague.

Yes, sir.

The plague!

Number one! Abandon ship!

They're going now, Captain.

Tell them... Tell them six bells, nor by nor east, west.

Aye, aye, sir.

Did you get that, Abdullah?

Yes. Good.

Six bells, nor by nor east, west. Come on, boys, get a move on. Abdullah!

Abdullah!

Forget it. We are going 20 degrees south, Algiers.

I was already going there.

No, Ned, no, then.

The blue bits is the sea, and the brown bits is the... Blank. Blank, that's it.

That's it.

Why do you keep looking? That's a blank piece of paper.

What? That's not a blank piece of paper, lad.

That's a blank map. What was drawn by Ratsmohamed with the disappearing ink,

what has disappeared.

When are you going to let me go?

Let you go, lad.

Ah, well, I'll tell you when.

As soon as I sees a bit of land.

But at the minute, I'm sure I'll have to tell you, lad.

There's not a sight of it anywhere.

I can't see a bit of land, lad. I can't see none land there.

Or if I could, I would tell you so.

One, two, three, four, five.

One, two, three, four.

What do you call this?

It's bean stew.

Never mind what it's been. What is it now?

I have an idea.

Let us go see the captain.

Captain,

the men have a complaint.

Sure, boy.

We'll all see the doctor when we get to shore.

The food, Captain.

The men have only been getting five beans a meal. They want more food or

they will mutiny.

Mutiny? What's that?

It means we'll stop work.

We'll stop work?

That's mutiny.

She's an Arab merchantman. That means food.

She's unarmed.

That doesn't frighten me now.

Them's is a ten-course dinner ship, them's. Now then, lads, stand by

to get closer to them's ship and to get on them's

and... Sunday, quick, the flag.

Aye, aye.

Scull and bones?

The scull and bones. Let them see it. Aye, aye.

All the way, Siegfried. Aye.

There she goes.

Pierre.

Jess, Jess, my friend.

Pierre, you're pirates.

Sometimes we are called that.

If they can't, if they can't.

Hurry,

hurry, hurry.

We'll be eating like kings tonight, lads.

Stand by grappling hook. Stand by grappling hook. Grappling hook.

Get all the boarding wraps.

Boarding wraps.

Now then, lads, when I lose the hand, that's the time when we go.

Jeremiah.

Jeremiah, what are you doing there? Get down from there. No, I won't.

Shut up, man.

So that's Madre de Dios.

He doesn't look at all well to me.

This looks like a trap. But that's Madre de Dios.

Come on, Jeremiah, hold on. Hold on to me tight.

Now,

next

time, my boy, you listen to me. You hear me?

You're a real pirate, though, aren't you, Pierre?

If you say so.

Not like Scratcher. No, no, no, no.

Not like a Scratcher. Never like a Scratcher.

It's night time over there.

A prize.

A prize, lads. A prize.

Look there.

It's a duck. A lovely little ducky.

Come on, little ducky.

Lovely little ducky there.

Food. Food, lads. It's real food in there. Duck food. Look at that.

Come on there, ducky.

Duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk. Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk,

tuk, tuk, tuk.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk.

Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk. Tuk, tuk, tuk, tuk,

tuk

The ducky's flown away!

I got to get the hames right.

Come on, ducky. Come on, ducky.

Come on now, little ducky.

There's a lovely ducky now.

I'll get you. Come here, little ducky.

Come on, ducky, ducky, ducky.

Ducky!

Come here.

I killed that duck!

Come here, little... Now, me buddy!

Now then, little duck, let's see you get out of this fire!

What was that?

You idiot!

You raven idiot!

You sunk the duck! Well, I'm not supposed to sit and shoot ducks, Kip!

Everybody.

The treasure, lads, think of it. The treasure, treasure, treasure.

Now

then,

lads, the bad news.

In a little minute, we's going to be docking in the Algiers.

I'm glad you stuck it so well, lads. But don't be downhearted now, because in

that there city, there's the women.

The dancing women.

If they're like that, we're not interested.

Oh, no, don't. There's one big trouble, lads. There's one big trouble.

The bay is expecting the treasures from us. And if we don't give it to them,

we're going to get only much lower down.

But never mind about all that. I've had a brilliant idea.

We're going to have a collection, lads. A collection of rings, earrings, gold

teeth, and odd things like that. Now, come on, lads. Give freely now to save

us having the terrible operation.

That's it, lads, now. Oh, that's beautiful. That thing will do very well.

Now, what about a nice orange?

Oh, there's another one. Two oranges we've got. Oh, and some lovely nuts.

Oh, the bay's going to be very pleased with this lot, lads, I can tell you. And

now, we've got a neat gold teeth and rings. Oh, look at that.

A fine kettle.

There must be some mistake.

I am a bit of a mistake, Your Honor.

Me mother never wanted me.

What ship are you?

Oh, the boat.

Oh, yeah, I got it here right on a bit of paper.

There you are.

The sword of the prophet. That's the same thing that's on that paper there.

You're late.

He is late.

And where is Ras Muhammad, the captain?

Oh, well, he was killed, sir.

Yes, sir.

How did he go?

He went hard.

Like that. It was an attack of the hearts.

I sent Ras Muhammad to collect slaves and treasures from the Azores.

Where are they? What happened was, you see, Your Honour, we got into a terrible

storm. Oh, it was awful. Oh, really. Everything was blown overboard.

Things were going here and there, and all the maps went overboard.

It was the first time I was ever with the C6.

Oh, it was.

What about astral navigation?

That was blown overboard and all, sir.

And who is this boy?

Ah, no, that boy is a captive.

But I personally overpowered myself.

Is this true boy?

Yes, sir. He took me against my will.

I like him.

Seize him!

Well, yes, look at that.

He's taken me ghostly, spotter.

Behind it! Behind it!

Your Highness, don't take that boy.

Don't take him.

Once, Your Honor, I was loved by a woman.

For her, I killed. I killed her husband, her brother, and her father.

And the fellow who had brought in the milk, all of them.

This was the crime that drove me to Algiers, Your Highness.

To you, to your feet.

Oh, Your Honor.

Your Honor.

But that boy, that little boy, is me only son.

Incarcerate him.

Incarcerate them all.

Your new captain, Dick Stratcher, is a liar and a fool.

I shall put him to death. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, please.

I do not think that is right. I would spoil everything.

Why?

Because he is the only one who knows where the treasure is.

Torture it from him.

This man is such a coward that if I tortured him, he would die of a heart

attack. What do you suggest?

Provision this ship.

Set him free.

You see, he believes I am his friend.

Let him lead me right to the treasure.

Voila.

And then put him to death.

It would be my pleasure.

Pierre.

Rodriguez.

Do it slowly.

And painfully.

You and the men have been released.

I knew that bear

would have to relent.

He never let a great seaman like me rot in the dead.

Let's go and have a wee jazz.

Now, we play a little game, you see. Me hide the olive under boxy. You get

olive, you eat the olive, right?

Me put it under there, right. Now then, you put your money here, right?

Put your money there, that's it. Put your money there.

Now then.

Not there.

Not there.

And not there, see?

So me take your money.

What?

Step outside and say that.

All right, get out of here. Go on.

Should I let him in the country?

Seeing this man's is a bit of luck.

Let the bag keep the boy, for it'll be Billy Bombay what'll lead me to the

treasure.

Ho, ho, dear lad.

Oh, it's that smelly old seagull, Dick Scratcher.

Ho, ho, Bill.

Bill Bombay, me darling.

I see you're still working the old tree cupboard.

Yes. Well, I'd like to put a bit of money. I'm feeling a betting mood.

Any time. Take your money, lad. On the elusive olive. I'd like to put a bit on

there. All right. Put your money down. You're ready. There's me money. You're

ready. There, then, dear. Yes, I do. Right, then, it's not there, it's not

there. But it's there, Bill.

What? If there, there it is.

Oh, you're naughty devil. You know, always were a bad luck on me, Dick

Stretcher. Oh, Bill, Bill, listen, listen. Your look's just about to

change, because I'm going to help you, darling. How about that? You help me?

Yes. Now, come over here with me, and let's have a talk. We can talk here.

Yes, we can talk here over there. Come on, now, Billy.

He'll be back.

He and me, darling. I told you it was a lovely joke. Come here.

Bill, Bill, Bill, if you can, if you can help me see the ghosty Arachma Hamlet,

I'll share the treasures with you, Bill, I will, because I've seen it, I've seen

it with my own eyes. Oh, Bill, there was pearls, pearls, as big as duck's eggs.

More likely ducks as big as pearl's eggs.

Will you come with me, Bill?

Oh, no, never mind about that, Bill. Never mind about that, mate, I'll sail

with you. A fawn!

Yes, yes, mate. You never kept a promise and you never will.

Oh, the dirtiest scum do I ever sail with.

I'll never mind about that. Again, because I tell you what, mate.

I got treasure on my own.

What? Treasure?

Treasure. Treasure.

Treasure. Treasure. Treasure.

Treasure. Treasure.

Treasure. Yes, that got your old ear holes up, didn't it? Yes, yes. I found a

Greeky Pooh's island.

And there's silver in it. And I know the exact...

Fuck! Listen, listen, I'll give you one last chance. Will you come with me or

not?

Well... Fuck!

All right, then the fuck's on your bill. And for you!

And it's not them filthy, dirty old brothers of yours.

I've seen the back of their shirts. Get out of here! Get out! Get out, take them

boys with you. Come on, lads, get over here.

Monsieur? Hello!

He's a good-looking lad.

And I'm setting sail for my treasure island today!

How much did you make, Captain?

About tuppence, I think. Something like that.

I wonder where the devil Cherrymire can be.

Oh!

Cherrymire! Captain Scratcher!

Get me out of here! I can't stand the fleas!

Cherrymire, you'll have to wait until it's dark.

Oh, lads, look, it's the knight.

Right, follow me, lads.

Yes, Papa.

Come in this way.

Oh, I was just going... Oh, oh, oh, wait a moment.

Do not I know you?

Oh, your face looks very familiar.

Turn your head to the side, please.

What rope?

Don't tell me you forgot the rope.

All right, I won't.

There's another fine mess I've got you into. All right, lads, come this way.

Are you all right, my little friend? I'm enjoying it.

Come on, let's get out of here.

I told you never to listen to him.

Now then, men, and I mean that personally, we's going with this boat on

a search for the treasure.

You've been saying that for years.

All right, then, all right.

So I've been playing the waiting game.

Now, lads, according to the rules, this here treasure belongs to the Bey of

Algiers. But now, if we don't give it to him, it's going to be ours, isn't it?

Now, lads, I'm willing to share this treasure with you.

I'm willing to do that, so let me have at your hands all the youth boys who's

with me.

Right,

now why shouldn't we keep the treasure for ourselves?

At your hands!

I've had enough of this idiot.

Our time will come to not be a fool.

This is the Bale ship and we are his servants.

Stop this. We will all die.

Die!

Please.

I'll rip him. I'll tear him apart.

I'll tear his nose off.

What are you doing?

What am I doing?

Him and his big fat belly is going to walk that plankty little one out of it.

That's what I'm doing. Is he going to fall into the sea? Yes, that's the idea.

But that's terrible.

Only for him.

Come on, up there with him.

Keep him off me, lad.

I'll kill him, I'll kill him.

You thought you was going to lead this crew against me, did you?

This is the Bale ship, and we are his servants.

You have the best unwritten laws of the Barbary pirates, and you are scum!

God, look at that. Ring me up.

Oh, you're fantastic.

Give me that.

Now then, Mr.

Haberduller, how would you like a little pokey, pokey, pokey?

Pokey, pokey, pokey.

One here, one there.

Captain, think of his mother.

Think of your mother.

Mother. Push him in.

Right. Now then, Mr. Haberduller, have you any last requests?

I would like to sing a farewell song to my mother.

Right then, but just this once.

And so my dear mother Fatima...

is drawing near but do not worry my dearest one

because i have no fear because i have no fear

no fear no fear oh my song

for you a little baby boy is going to die

Who's that?

It was me!

I couldn't have stopped it! I didn't know!

I'm coming after her!

There's me personal ghostage, Potter.

Help!

Save me!

Save me! Save me first!

Save me!

I'm the captain!

Save me!

I don't like that water.

I told you to get you back on dry land, safe and sound.

What? Throw that back in!

No!

Just do an old round with him!

Oh, dear.

All right!

Don't throw him back in, then.

Oh,

this is a terrible time in my life.

I'll have to think of something else.

Now, then, what's another thing?

Put a drone in.

Ah, that's better.

Whoever of them gets hungry first eats the other.

Ah, yes.

Time I consolated the map.

Ah, buenos dias, amigos.

It is a beautiful morning, no?

What the... Hamid, what is this?

You are completely off course.

What are you doing?

Now look here, what you're doing with that, that course there?

You see, we are four points off the course.

Listen, put that thing back where I left it. No, no. Aye, sir. Right, Captain.

Now look, Capitan, we are four points off the course, and I will tell you now

that this is the true course.

If that's how you want it.

Come and fight like a man.

Oh, so the captain wants to

play, eh?

I'm gone.

Hey, hey!

How would you like a taste of Irish tea?

Oh, they click slow.

They're Captain

Pyre.

Let's see who's the captain of this ship now then.

Hmm. That is a very clever trick.

But dirty.

Like the man.

Land ahead!

Land!

Land ahead to Glacier Hager.

Land ahead.

Land!

What is? It is land.

But it's the same place where we was anchored 14 years ago.

And who was it said that I was no good at the navigation?

Who was that now?

Now then, Captain Poirier.

You knows the price of being a mutineer.

I think he's trying to tell me something.

You is me friend, Poirier.

This is going to hurt me more than it is you, so I tell you that.

Scratcher, you will pay for this.

No, I won't. I'm doing this for free.

Get ready to stop living.

Another one coming up.

What? A one. One.

A two.

And a three.

What? The boy. He's got a wife.

Where? What?

Oh, well, it don't matter.

This island's surrounded by water. I know that personally.

There's only one bloke I know of can walk on water.

Captain, if you have finished with me, can I get off this bottle?

Well, uh, all right.

But don't forget to remind me to hang ya, see?

No, no. Cos I got things on me mind at the minute I might forget about it. Of

course, my captain, of course.

Thank you.

Not only I think I can see ghosts...

But I can see them in the daytime.

This is going to cost Scratcher extra.

Abdullah!

But how did you get here?

What you saw was my clothes, stuffed full of sand and a coconut for my head.

While they put that ashore, I lay covered in the bottom of the boat. They

brought me back.

I crept into the hold where I'd been these two long weeks.

What are these?

Geneva. The Bay of Algiers has an orchard of them.

Hey, be careful.

You'll stain your clothes.

Like this.

You must go back to that dirty scratcher.

But he will kill me, to be sure.

Oh, no.

Not before you find the treasure.

That's good.

Because it would take me a long time to do that.

Jeremiah, Ras Muhammad was murdered by that dirty Scratcher and he does not

sleep.

When night comes, you will see him.

Then, mark the spot, but send Scratcher the other way.

You seen him yet?

Who? Who?

The ghost of Ratsmohammond. That's who he is.

No, not yet.

He must be having dinner or something. We've been waiting around here for

hours. Patience, Capitano.

Patience, patience.

Patience? Listen, I've been trying to find this stuff for hours.

What was that?

Frog.

Well, what was that?

Another frog.

Oh, I got the hang of them frogs now.

Good, Capitano, good, good.

Ah, shut up, them frogs now.

Oh, me poor old feet.

Oh, dear.

Oh,

that's better.

Ow! Oh, me head!

Please, Captain, you frightened the ghost away.

What? Men's frightening ghosts away.

Oh, that'll be the day. I've seen everything then. Men's frightening

ghosts. Oh, oh, oh.

Oh, yeah.

What's he staring at?

Stupid little devil.

I don't think there's nothing out there in the dark. That's what I think. I

don't think there's nothing out there in the dark. You've been standing around

here for hours, three, acting like you're not a ninny, waiting for Ghostie

to show up. And I think you're lying. That's what I think you're doing. You're

lying. Yes, you are. You're lying.

Captain, I never... Captain, I would keep your hands off the boy. Don't tell

me what to do. I'm the captain of this airship. And what I say is God.

It's going to stay tight up there until you seize the Ghostie.

And we're going back.

and we're going to have a nice little sleep on the boaty.

And when you seize that ghosty, don't forget now, give out a nice loud, Ha-ha!

Oh, I searched the world for thunder. I saved half of the maid.

I pulled the vat from under the legs of the king of Spain.

Oh, who left that thing there?

And the 10s, the 11s, the 12s, and then

the 13s. Oh, no! Oh, no, not that.

13, you're lucky. Oh, it's a terrible number, this, that.

No,

we've got to have 12 with another one on the top.

I see. Then it's all right. 12 with another one on the top.

Right, dig there.

First you'll find a skeleton, and then you'll find three cats.

Patricia!

No, no, no, no, no, no! Where's the skeleton?

There is not one here.

This is the wrong place, then.

Ay, carajo!

Then we have found another treasure

And we'll all have a lovely share out.

Yes, sir, come on.

Pull the boys.

Them's the treasure!

Them's canyon bars!

Take them away!

Take them away!

Right!

Now, right.

30 years I've been your captain.

And 30 years ago, I promised you a side of the treasure.

Right.

Today's the day.

No! Right then! Follow me!

Wait!

Shit, that's it! That's the one!

Captain, Captain, we're...

We got enough bad luck without them.

Fire them gun things.

Right, let him have it, lad.

They owe me money.

I'll get her down, I'll get her down, I'll give her to the young devil in

town.

That's not fair.

All my brothers being killed.

All my lovely cannonball to go to the bottom of the sea.

It's not fair.

This one's granny's fault. It is fault.

Watch out for

me, Bumpy. There's a power of strength in them shoulders there.

Oh, Bill, Bill. Bill, darling Bill, don't kill me. I'm too young to die.

You're just the right age.

Now the faggot!

Now it's your turn in the battlefield.

Get off me, Bill. Bill, what are you doing to me?

They're my own arms.

They're Irish arms, Bill.

They're my Irish arms. Never mind you.

Thank God you got him off me fire.

In another moment, I'd have thrown him in pieces.

What's the matter with you, Bill?

What's got into you that you'd never liked it before?

You stole my treasure.

You stole my balls.

What? We ain't got no balls and we ain't got no treasure.

Are you blind?

These are my balls.

What? They're pure silver.

What?

What?

Them's is a king's ransom in balls.

Why, Harris, how many did we fire?

All of them.

There goes my pension scheme.

No, Billy, darling. Billy, darling boy.

Don't forget, don't forget.

On that... On that island is still the treasure of

Ratsmahamnald. You can see the ghosties, can't you?

If you can see the ghosties of rats.

Rats? What rats?

Ratsmahamnalds.

Now, this is how it is.

We got two ghostie spotters. That increases our chances twice.

Whichever of the ghostie spotters... sees the ghosty first, that's the one

what gets the extra share.

Well, good luck on you, lad, but I must warn you, I can see a ghost in the

middle of the day with me eyes shut.

Lads, you all heard what darling Bill said.

By tomorrow night, we's all going to be rich as princes.

Well, that sort of thing went on, you see. And then what happened? Well,

suddenly, the clock tower... Bum!

Bum!

Three o'clock!

The door in me bedroom opens up creaky, creaky, creaky, and there's this 16-foot

-high ghost.

and there he goes, she says.

What did you shout for?

She was deaf.

A deaf ghost?

A deaf ghost. The deafness killed her. How?

You see, there was a steamroller coming up behind her and she didn't hear it

coming.

After that, I seen lots of ghosts, as you know.

Cleopatra, Julian Caesar, the Queen of Sheep, all them fellas I seen.

Yes.

How many ghosts do you see, son?

Never mind, lad.

Hey, now, don't you lot go making fun of that boy, cos that boy could easily be

the one what sees the ghost of Ratsmohamed.

He's right, you know.

Oh, I am right, that.

Right, now, off you two's goes, and good luck to the one what is first the one to

see the ghostie.

Right,

think of it, me lads.

By this time tomorrow, we'll all be rich as...

Has... has somebody?

Well,

my hairs, I think we'll camp here. But then... My hairs!

Where's that man gone?

What's that?

It's the wind.

That's the wind, isn't it?

Don't be frightened now.

Stay close to me. If anything happens, you get beyond me. Where would you go?

Beyond you.

Don't you worry about that.

Old Billy Bombay, he's frightened of nothing.

What was that?

See, I told her, he's frightened of nothing.

Mr. Bombay?

Mr.? I think we should split off. Oh, no, no!

No, we've got to stay here. We've got to see that naughty ghosty poo together.

See, and then when the treasure comes, we get 50-50 each, see? Good idea?

I've got to stop dinking this stuff.

Now then.

Emma?

Hello?

Who are you?

Damn it!

There, there, Jeremiah, my boy. Do not be frightened.

It is your old friend, Pierre and Abdullah.

Jeremiah!

Pierre!

This juniper is fantastic.

Here, Jeremiah, have some.

No, thanks. I'll get me clothes dirty. My mother would be awful angry with me.

Uh-huh.

It is strange.

There was some juniper juice stains on my tunic.

Now they've gone.

Wait a minute.

When Ras Muhammad drew his treasure map, the ink faded away.

He must have been dipping his quill in jennifer juice.

And Scratcher said he was spitting jennifer seeds just before he choked to

death. Well, this is the jennifer tree. It came from a seed that Ras Muhammad

spat out.

We must be standing on the treasure.

My dear.

You know, this boy may be right.

I'm sure of it.

I'll go and get Captain Scratcher and the others.

No, no, no, Jeremiah. No, no, Jeremiah. No, no. You do not understand.

You see, this treasure belongs to the Bay of Algiers.

Now, if Escarge digs it up, he will keep it for himself.

But if we do, we will share it with the crew after we have delivered it to the

Bay.

Then the treasure must be buried here.

Let us look for it now, huh?

But very carefully.

Very carefully. Let us look for this.

We must be around here somewhere.

I'll find him. I'll find him if they're here. You'll find him. I'll find him.

I think you're a man of wisdom. I am that. I am. Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! My lovely foot.

Now then.

Jerry Meyer and my heirs, we know exactly where he's hiding. We know

that. Now, don't try and get away. No, then. I'll tell you what I'm going to

do. I'm going to count up to the hundred, and then I'm going to count up

to the hundred and the fifty.

And so on until you give it in. Right.

One, two...

Seven, three, three.

We'll

never

do it this way.

If they bet he did hit.

They must have left each shovel somewhere.

Then why don't we look for them?

That is a very good question.

Why don't we look for them?

What comes after 12?

13. Oh, no, not that. That's an unlucky number, 13.

I found them!

I found them!

Oh, very good. This one?

Sixteen thousand and one.

That was a good year.

Look at them's rock.

Yeah.

That's a good rock, that is. I had a rock once. I took it home.

Well, now, lads, if any of you wants any of these here rocks, you have my

personal permission to take them.

Right now.

That's very nice of you to give them these rocks, Snubber. Well, you've got

to keep them happy.

16,159.

We're coming to get you, five herds.

17,0112.

17,0113.

17,0114.

Where you going with that rock? I thought it would go all right with the

one I got back home.

That's it. You found it.

Look

at

this. Look at this.

Huh?

Poor Ras Mohamed. I knew him well.

Here you are.

Here you are.

Think

of

your poor mother back in Ireland. That's what you have to think of.

Ah, look here, Scratts! What? I don't think you know where that cigarette is!

No, and we don't want you for our captain anymore.

Right, right!

So that's it, then?

So you've had enough, have you? Yes, we have. Ah, you've had enough. But what

about me, then?

Don't you think that I've had enough?

Walking around with this silly bandage on my head all the time.

Don't you think about that?

What do you think you're doing? Driving me into an early grave, walking around

this, slaving me head to the barn for useless?

What do you want me to do? To perform the miracle? Yes!

Well, I knew that! I knew you was wanting me to perform.

We don't want any miracles, mate.

All we want off you is to share that treasure you've been promised to us for

months. Oh, you don't want me to perform the miracle? Yes, what do you want me to

do? I knew that.

You want me to just go and cut the bushes?

And there they are, digging the stuff up. And there they are, digging the

stuff up.

Well, yes, look at that.

I tell you, it is a king's ransom.

A king's ransom.

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Caught you, playhead. Caught you, playhead.

Oh, oh.

Williams, look at that.

I never see the sight like that without my... Oh, look at that. Take your hands

off my throat, Will.

That might inspire him.

I'll tell you it's mine!

I think it is your treasure.

Right, I told you it was my treasure. No, wait a minute. I'll pick it.

It's mine again.

It is, I tell you. Hang on, Bill. I think it is yours. I think it's yours. I

think that's your treasure.

Except for that one there.

Hard that is spying. It's your treasure.

I knew it.

You're the real Captain Man, aren't you, Pierre?

Yes, mi amadito, yes.

So now we can attack Spanish galleons and catch a Phoenician merchantman?

Oh, not on this voyage, Jeremiah.

We are setting sail for Ireland.

I don't want to go home.

I want to be a pirate with you.

Well, we will see what your mother has to say about that, don't we?

Abdullah!

When we are on board, set course 30 degrees north by northwest.

30 degrees north by northwest.

No, six degrees south by southeast.

To Algiers.

Perfecto, Jeremiah, perfecto. You have learned well, my friend. Very good.

Oh, oh, me dying will be the words lost.

Oh, shut up, you idiot.

Oh, she's the dear sweet voice of Bill Bombay.

Oh, I'm not dead either. Get me down from this scary place.

Now, don't tell me I'm not dead now.

I was killed by persons or persons unknown from the behind, I was. It's not

fair!

Oh! Oh!

It's true, then. I'm still alive, then. Yes, yes. Well, I wish you was, you

smelly thing.

You're a plague. So, Dick Scratcher lives to tell again, then.

Not with me, for I should never listen to you in the first place.

Oh, so it's you then, Bill. Yes.

Oh, then I should have never listened to you in the second place. How about that?