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[REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING]

Buju Banton: ♪ WANT THE WORLD KNOW

♪ KNOW EVERYTHING, MUST BE SOMEWHERE FOR ME ♪

♪ I WANT YOUR LOVE, I NEED IT DESPERATELY ♪

♪ YOUR LOVE

♪ I WANNA BE LOVED

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM

♪ NOT WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE

♪ COULD YOU LOVE ME FOR ME?

WELL? NERVOUS?

GOOD LUCK!

GOD, I CAN'T WAIT TILL IT'S OVER.

THANKS!

YOU'LL BE FINE. JUST CHILL.

JUST DON'T LET THE OCCASION GET TO YOU.

HEY, GOOD LUCK WITH TOMORROW.

THANKS, ANN.

♪ BEEN SEARCHIN' A LONG, LONG TIME ♪

♪ FOR THAT OH, SO TRUE LOVE ♪

♪ TO COMFORT THIS HEART OF MINE ♪

♪ NO, I CAN'T STOP...

YOU WILL BE THERE, WON'T YOU?

OF COURSE I WILL.

IT'S NOT EVERY DAY

THAT ONE OF MY TRAINEES GETS MARRIED.

♪ I'M TELLIN' YOU, LADY

♪ I'M ONLY HUMAN

♪ I'M NOT BE LOOKIN' FOR IMPOSSIBILITY ♪

♪ JUST A GENUINE WOMAN WITH SINCERITY ♪

♪ SOMEONE WHO...

OH, I'VE GOT TO HURRY UP. GOT SO MUCH TO DO.

GOOD LUCK. DON'T BE LATE.

I'M SURE IT'S HIM THAT'S GONNA BE LATE.

♪ ALL THE POSITIVE MEANINGS ♪

♪ LOVE ME MORNING, NOON ALL SEASONS ♪

♪ I WANNA BE LOVED

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM

♪ NOR WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE

HI.HELLO, SIR.

I REALLY NEED SOME FLOWERS.

THOSE WILL BE GREAT. HOW MUCH IS THAT?

$3.50.

$3.50. HERE'S A 5.WAIT.

OI.

HA HA.

ALL RIGHT? HERE.

HERE'S THE TAPE.

IT'S GOOD. YOU'LL LIKE THAT ONE.

HERE YOU GO.

GOOD LUCK. YOU'LL NEED IT.

♪ I'M LIKE WAITING ON SOME HONEY BUT THERE AIN'T NO QUEEN BEE ♪

♪ EVERYBODY'S LAUGHING SOME SAY I'M SILLY ♪

♪ NO INFATUATION, NO LOVE FANTASY ♪

♪ WOMAN, YOU LEAD MY LIFE LIKE A STRING ♪

♪ I CAN'T TAKE THE ON AND OFF THING ♪

♪ I AM OH SO LONELY INSIDE ♪

♪ SO I SING LOVE ME

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM

♪ NOR WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE

SYLVIA!

WAIT.

YOU CAN'T MARRY HIM.

LOOK, THERE'S SOMETHING REALLY IMPORTANT

THAT YOU'VE GOT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS GUY.

HE'S ALREADY MARRIED.

I SAW HIM COMING OUT OF "RELATE" THE OTHER DAY.

IF YOU MARRY HIM, YOU'RE A BIGAMIST.

COME ON, VIC.

YOU CAN DO BETTER THAN THIS.

YESTERDAY HE WAS A TERRORIST,

THE DAY BEFORE, A DRUG DEALER.

WHO DO YOU THINK I AM?

ALL RIGHT, HE'S NOT A TERRORIST,

BUT, LOOK, YOU STILL CAN'T MARRY HIM.

GIVE ME ONE GOOD REASON.

BECAUSE I LOVE YOU.

OH, VIC, YOU DON'T LOVE ME.

YOU LOVE THE FOOL

WHO USED TO TIDY UP BEHIND YOU,

LICK YOUR BOOTS,

STAY UP HALF THE NIGHT

LISTENING TO YOUR PATHETIC DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR--

WHO YOU DUMPED FOR THAT ACTRESS, REMEMBER?

WELL, I'M NOT THAT FOOL ANYMORE, THANK GOD.

LOOK, THAT WAS A MISTAKE.

THE WORST MISTAKE

I'VE EVER MADE IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

I DIDN'T MEAN IT.

I WAS STUPID.

I WAS IMMATURE. I WAS...

OK.YOU WERE A BASTARD.

I'M GONNA MARRY DAVE,

AND THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO OR SAY

TO STOP ME.

SYLVIA, I'VE CHANGED.

I PROMISE YOU I'VE CHANGED.

Alison: BASTARD.

YOU MUSTN'T LISTEN TO HIM.

HE'S JUST PUTTING ON AN ACT.

HE'S AN ACTOR, REMEMBER?

A PRETTY BAD ONE.

I KNOW.

LOOK...

I'M GONNA TELL YOU SOMETHING I HAVEN'T TOLD YOU BEFORE

BECAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO HURT YOU.

VICTOR IS THE WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO YOU.

SUCH A PHONY.

ALLIE, YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT THE MAN

I SPENT 6 YEARS OF MY LIFE WITH.

I WAS VERY HAPPY...

MOST OF THE TIME.

IT'S JUST THAT I LOVED HIM TOO MUCH.

REMEMBER, IT WAS HIM WHO DUMPED YOU

FOR ANOTHER GIRL.

IT WAS A TERRIBLE MISTAKE.

I DIDN'T SAY GETTING INVOLVED WITH CAROL

WAS A TERRIBLE MISTAKE.

WHAT WAS A TERRIBLE MISTAKE WAS TELLING SYLVIA.

AT LEAST I WAS HONEST.

SHE'S GONE.

SHE'S NOT COMING BACK, YOU KNOW?

MATE, IT'S NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.

PLENTY MORE FISH IN THE SEA.

I MEAN, LOOK.

Huh?

AHEM.

HEY, DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS GUY IS?

NO.

HE IS VICTOR BUKOWSKI,

A VERY, VERY WELL-KNOWN ACTOR.

Waitress: HE'S GOT A NICE HAIRY NECK.

[LAUGHTER]

THERE, YOU SEE?

SAYS YOU'VE GOT A NICE HAIRY NECK.

EH?

SHE'S IN THE BAG.

[CHUCKLES]

HI! THERE HE IS.

OOH. YOU'RE SO LUCKY.

HI.

HI.HI.

ALLIE, HOW ARE YOU DOING?

I'M FINE.

SWEETHEART.

IT'S GREAT TO SEE HER SO HAPPY.

SHE'S BEEN TALKING ABOUT YOU ALL DAY.

ALLIE.

OOH. I GOTTA GO.

I'LL SEE YOU GUYS TOMORROW...

AT CHURCH!

BYE!BYE!

HELLO, BABE.

LOOK, VIC, WE ALL MAKE MISTAKES.

BUT WE LEARN FROM THEM,

AND WE GET OVER THEM.

YOU CAN'T DWELL ON THE PAST FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

[BEEP]

Recording: VICTOR BUKOWSKI.

IT'S SEAN DALTREY HERE, YOUR AGENT.

WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE,

MARLON FUCKING BRANDO?

YOU, MY FRIEND, ARE GOING DOWN THE PAN.

LISTEN, DON'T ASK ME HOW,

BUT I MANAGED TO GET YOU SOME WORK.

IT'S A SCI-FI FILM CALLED

IT'S CALLED THE RETURN OF KILLING SILHOUETTES.

YOU GOT 3 LINES.

YOU GOTTA BE DOWN THERE MONDAY, 5 A.M.,

AND FOR CHRIST'S SAKE, BUKOWSKI,

DON'T ARGUE WITH THE DIRECTOR THIS TIME.

THIS JOB IS YOUR LAST FUCKING CHANCE, OK?

OH, AND BY THE WAY, YOU'RE A MARTIAN.

[BEEP]

[ANSWERING MACHINE STOPS]

MY EX-GIRLFRIEND.

SHE'S GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW.

OH, IS SHE?

YEAH.

WE WERE TOGETHER FOR 6 YEARS AND 25 DAYS.

AND NOW SHE'S GETTING MARRIED

TO SOMEBODY ELSE.

Clerk: SHE'S MARRYING THIS OTHER GUY TOMORROW?

THAT'S A PHOTOGRAPH OF HER.

SHE'S A BEAUTIFUL GIRL.

SHE'S BEAUTIFUL, ISN'T SHE?

AND NOW SHE'S GONNA GO MARRY SOME OTHER GUY.

I'M MADLY IN LOVE WITH HER AND SHE LEFT ME 8 MONTHS AGO.

YOU EVER DO SOMETHING SO TERRIBLE

THAT YOU'D GIVE ANYTHING IN THE WORLD TO PUT IT RIGHT?

ARE YOU DRINKING FROM A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

OR BECAUSE YOU STILL LOVE HER?

YOU DON'T DRINK ON A GUILTY CONSCIENCE

AFTER, LIKE, 8 MONTHS.

MMM. YOU WANNA BE SURE.

WHAT'S THE SAYING?

2 WRONGS DON'T MAKE A RIGHT.

SO WHAT STOPS YOU TWO

FROM GETTING BACK TOGETHER THEN?

JUST THE FACT

THAT SHE'S GETTING MARRIED TO SOMEBODY ELSE TOMORROW.

SOME ASSHOLE THAT SHE MET IN A GYM.

I MEAN, CAN YOU IMAGINE

MARRYING SOMEBODY THAT YOU MET IN A GYM?

WHERE DID SHE FIRST MEET YOU?

IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL.

NO, I WAS...

WORKING IN THE CAFE THERE,

AND SHE WAS A STUDENT.

SO WHAT KIND OF PERSON DO YOU MEET

IN A PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL?

LOSER.

SOME ACTOR WHO THINKS HE'S MARLON FUCKING BRANDO.

AN ACTOR? WOW.

YEAH, UNEMPLOYED ACTOR.

REALLY?

MM-HMM.

I'M SURPRISED,

'CAUSE YOU'VE GOT A VERY INTERESTING FACE.

OH, NO, I DON'T.

NO, YOU DO, YOU DO.

I CAN SPOT A CHARISMATIC FACE FROM A MILE OUT.

WELL, APPARENTLY,

I DON'T HAVE A VERY CHARISMATIC MOUTH.

NO, I ARGUE TOO MUCH.

DID YOU USED TO ARGUE WITH HER, TOO?

NO.

WE HAD SOMETHING REALLY SPECIAL,

YOU KNOW?

YEAH.

SOMETHING SPECIAL.

WHY DO WE ALWAYS THINK

WE'VE FOUND SOMETHING SPECIAL,

SOMETHING UNREPEATABLE,

YOUR ONE AND ONLY TRUE LOVE?

AND YOU ALWAYS END UP TELLING

THE SAME OLD STORY.

SO...

DID YOU AT LEAST HAVE THE GUTS TO TELL HER

OR DID SHE FIND OUT?

NO, I TOLD HER.

I'D BEEN SEEING THIS GIRL CAROL

WHO WAS AN ACTRESS,

WHO I THOUGHT THAT I'D FALLEN IN LOVE WITH.

[MOANING]

WE WERE AT HER FLAT AFTER REHEARSALS,

AND SHE WAS IN THE PLAY I WAS IN AT THAT TIME.

BUT I DON'T KNOW.

I JUST--I WASN'T WITH HER THAT DAY.

I KNOW, DEEP IN MY HEART,

I WAS FEELING BAD,

AND WORRIED ABOUT SYLVIA,

SO WHEN I LEFT CAROL'S FLAT I WAS IN A STRANGE MOOD,

AND THEN TO MAKE MATTERS 10 TIMES WORSE,

IT WAS CARNIVAL.

♪ LET'S GO!

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

Victor: IF THERE'S ONE THING ON THE PLANET

THAT I ABSOLUTELY HATE,

IT'S THE NOTTING HILL CARNIVAL.

BECAUSE, I MEAN, IF YOU LIVE THERE,

FOR 3 DAYS IT'S JUST MAYHEM.

YOU CAN'T SLEEP, YOU CAN'T THINK,

YOU CAN'T BREATHE.

AND I'VE NEVER UNDERSTOOD

WHY THEY CAN'T HAVE IT IN WINTER

LIKE THEY DO IN MOST NORMAL COUNTRIES

INSTEAD OF AUGUST.

AT THIS POINT,

I WAS THINKING WHAT TO TELL SYLVIA

IN CASE SHE ASKED ME.

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, I THOUGHT I HEARD FREDDY

GIVING ME ONE OF HIS USUAL PIECES OF ADVICE.

FOR THESE KINDS OF SITUATIONS.

FIRST HAVE A BEER BEFORE YOU GO HOME

SO YOU SMELL OF ALCOHOL!

SECOND, NICK SOMETHING FROM HER DRAWERS!

AN EARRING OR A NECKLACE!

SAY I GAVE IT TO YOU, FOUND IT AT HOME.

Victor: THEN I RUN INTO SYLVIA'S BEST FRIEND.

ALISON IS A KING-SIZE PAIN IN THE ASS.

MANAGED TO HIDE FROM HER.

Victor: ANYWAY...

I FINALLY ARRIVED HOME...

HI.

Victor: AND THERE SHE IS.

HI.

I WAS, UH...

I WAS JUST TALKING TO A FRIEND ON THE PHONE,

AND SHE SAID SHE SAW YOU TODAY.

REALLY?

WHERE?

GOING INTO A HOUSE.

YEAH. FREDDY'S HOUSE.

WASN'T HIS STREET.

WHAT AM I TALKING ABOUT? FREDDY'S GIRLFRIENDS HOUSE.

YOU WENT ON YOUR OWN.

I KNOW, I KNOW, I KNOW.

I WAS WITH FREDDY'S GIRLFRIEND.

I BUMPED INTO HER

WHEN I WAS WALKING DOWN THE STREET.

WHAT A COINCIDENCE.

YEAH, ISN'T IT?

ANOTHER THING, UM...

BEFORE I FORGET...

FREDDY GAVE ME THIS,

AND WAS WONDERING

WHETHER OR NOT IT MIGHT BE YOURS.

MAYBE YOU DROPPED IT

THE LAST TIME YOU WERE OVER THERE.

BECAUSE HE'D ALREADY ASKED HIS GIRLFRIEND,

AND SHE SAID NO, IT WASN'T HERS.

AND SO HE WAS WONDERING

WHETHER OR NOT IT MIGHT BE YOURS.

IS IT YOURS?

YEAH.

IT'S MINE.

OH, GOOD.

MUST'VE DROPPED IT.

MM-HMM.

BEEN LOOKING FOR THAT FOR AGES.

HAVE YOU EATEN?

NO.

HOW'S THE CARNIVAL?

IT'S AS INSANE AS IT EVER IS.

I HATE IT SO.

OH, LET'S GO.

WHAT, YOU WANT TO GO OUT IN IT?

YEAH. I HAVEN'T BEEN OUT ALL DAY.

BUT YOU CAN'T-- YOU CAN'T MOVE OUT THERE.

COME ON.

[SIGHS]

YOU CAN GRIND.

[LAUGHS]

YEAH.

YEAH, ALL RIGHT THEN.

YEAH?

OK. OK. LET'S GO AND DO CARNIVAL THINGS.

WON'T BE A MINUTE.

ALL RIGHT.

SYLVIA...

I'M COMING.

IT'S WASN'T FREDDY'S GIRLFRIEND'S HOUSE.

IT WASN'T FREDDY'S GIRLFRIEND.

WHAT?

SO WHY DIDN'T YOU KEEP LYING?

YOU WERE DOING REALLY WELL.

DO YOU LOVE HER?

DO YOU?

YES.

YOU FUCKING BASTARD.

SYLVIA--

GO ON. GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!

GO FUCK YOURSELF!

SYLVIA!FUCK OFF!

[THUNDER]

IT WAS THE MOST HORRIBLE DAY OF MY LIFE.

SO WHAT HAPPENED TO THE OTHER GIRL?

AH, I DON'T KNOW. IT JUST KINDA FIZZLED OUT.

I WOKE UP ONE DAY NEXT TO HER,

AND I LOOKED AT HER AND I THOUGHT...

"I DON'T LOVE YOU."

STRANGE, ISN'T IT,

HOW THE LIGHT JUST CHANGES SOMETIMES?

[SOMBER PIANO MUSIC PLAYING]

AND THEN...

I TRIED TO GO BACK TO SYLVIA, BUT...

I WAS TOO LATE.

THE LIGHT HAD CHANGED FOR HER, TOO.

YEAH.

[CHIMES]

IF ONLY I COULD GO BACK AND...

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

NAH. THIS LAST ONE'S ON THE HOUSE.

THANK YOU.

SEE YOU.

YEAH.

[THUNDER]

HEY.

TAKE THIS.

IT'S RAINING.

IT'S A LITTLE FRAYED, BUT IT'S BETTER THAN NOTHING.

[CACKLING]

OOH!

I FEEL LIKE SHIT.

ME, TOO. I HAD A LONG DAY.

GO ON. THROW ME IN YOUR TRUCK.

SEÑOR.

I THINK WE HAVE A PROBLEM HERE.

ME.

HE WANTS ME TO THROW HIM IN THE TRUCK.

'CAUSE I'M RUBBISH.

I THINK HE'S PISSED.

WRONG, RAFAEL. WRONG.

THIS POOR MAN IS DELUDED.

AND IT IS NO FAULT OF HIS.

NO, NO.

THIS POOR MAN NEEDS OUR HELP.

[TRUCK HORN HONKING]

[LAUGHING]

WHERE ARE WE GOING?

Victor: WHOO!

LOOK YONDER, MY FRIEND.

[DOGS BARKING IN DISTANCE]

IT'S ALL THERE.

THE THINGS YOU THREW AWAY.

THE THINGS YOU DID NOT WANT ANYMORE.

THE THINGS YOU WERE DESIROUS TO FORGET.

THE THINGS THAT DID NOT FIT IN YOUR SADDLEBAG.

AND THE THINGS...

YOU LOST, TOO.

IT ALL ENDS UP HERE.

PUES YA EN LOS NIDOS DE ANTAÑO

NO HAY PáJAROS HOGANO.

WHAT?

YOU NEED TO LET GO.

Victor: HOW CAN PEOPLE THROW THINGS LIKE THIS AWAY?

AND BOOKS.

HOW CAN PEOPLE THROW AWAY BOOKS?

AH, THAT I UNDERSTAND.

OF COURSE,

I CAN NEITHER READ NOR WRITE.

BUT BOOKS ARE THE REASON

WHY PEOPLE END UP SEEING GIANTS

AND NOT WINDMILLS... DON MIGUEL.

IF YOU READ BOOKS, FRIEND RAFAEL,

PERHAPS A GREAT DEAL MORE

WOULD FIT IN YOUR POCKETS.

BUT FOR OUR NEW FRIEND AND MYSELF,

THE FUTURE IS AN EVEN BIGGER POCKET,

AND HE CANNOT SEE WHAT IT CONTAINS.

YOU ARE EVADING THE ISSUE, RAFAEL.

OUR FRIEND HERE...

IS ENCHANTED,

FOR HE SEES NO LIFE WITHOUT HIS PRINCESS

NOW THAT SHE IS MARRYING ANOTHER KNIGHT.

Victor: HOW DO THEY KNOW?

Don Miguel: AND WE NEED TO DISENCHANT HIM.

BUT IT DIDN'T WORK WITH DULCINEA, DON MIGUEL.

OH, THAT WAS AN EXCEPTION.

THIS TIME IT SHALLWORK.

Don Miguel: SHOW ME.

NOT HALF AS GOOD AS MASTER CERVANTES...

BUT IT WILL DO.

"FROM THIS WORLD-WEARIED FLESH,

"EYES LOOK YOUR LAST.

"ARMS, TAKE YOUR LAST EMBRACE.

"AND LIPS--

"O YOU, THE DOORS OF BREATH,

"SEAL WITH A RIGHTEOUS KISS

"A DATELESS BARGAIN

TO ENGROSSING DEATH."

Don Miguel: YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.

WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. HANG ON, HANG ON.

I WAS--I WAS...

I WAS ONLY JOKING. I--I DIDN'T...

NOW.

OK, OK, OK, OK.

NOW, IT'S EASIER...

IF YOU WEAR THIS.

YOU'VE NEVER SEEN US.

OTHERWISE...

YOU'LL BREAK THE SPELL.

YOUR HEART IS A KITE TANGLED IN A TREE.

GO...

AND DISENTANGLE IT.

[DON MIGUEL AND RAFAEL LAUGHING]

Don Miguel: HAVE YOU SENT THAT PAGE?

Rafael: FIRST CLASS.

HE WILL GET IT TOMORROW.

TOMORROW?

[LAUGHTER]

TOMORROW WILL NOW BE A LONG TIME FOR HIM.

[REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING]

AAH!

[SCREAM ECHOES]

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, HANDS UP ♪

♪ DOWN

♪ UP

♪ DOWN

♪ UP

♪ DOWN

♪ UP

♪ DOWN

♪ EVERYBODY, NOW PUT ONE HAND IN THE AIR ♪

♪ ONE HAND IN THE AIR...

THIS LAST YEAR'S STOCK?

NO, THIS IS THIS YEAR'S STOCK.

I'M NORMALLY LATE, BUT NOT THAT LATE.

WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM?

Victor: I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM.

WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO, SIR?

I DON'T KNOW WHERE I AM IN TIME.

IT'S 2 O'CLOCK.

WHAT DAY IS IT?

SUNDAY. CARNIVAL DAY.

WHAT MONTH IS IT?

AUGUST, SIR.

ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE?

HAVE A GOOD ONE, SIR.

YES!

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

[BLOWING WHISTLE TO MUSIC]

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, COME ON!

WELL, MAYBE I SHOULD JUST ASK HIM OUTRIGHT.

NO, 'CAUSE IF YOU'RE WRONG

YOU'LL MAKE A FOOL OUT OF YOURSELF.

THE ONE THING THAT NEVER FAILS.

SAY SOMETHING LIKE,

"I WAS CLEANING OUT THE ROOM

"AND A PACK OF CONDOMS

FELL OUT OF YOUR JACKET POCKET."

IF VIC IS GUILTY,

HE'LL GET ALL NERVOUS AND BETRAY HIMSELF.

ALLIE, THAT'S TERRIBLE.

HE'LL NEVER BELIEVE THAT.

WELL, YOU COULD SAY SOMETHING LIKE,

"I WAS SPEAKING TO A FRIEND TODAY ON THE PHONE,

AND SHE SAID SHE SAW YOU TODAY."

YEAH, THAT'S BETTER.

YEAH, WE'LL HAVE TO IMPROVISE AFTER THAT.

YEAH, I KNOW.

LOOK, I'M JUST BEING SILLY.

VIC'D NEVER DO ANYTHING LIKE THAT TO ME.

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER...

YEAH, BYE.

[BLOWING WHISTLE]

ALLIE? ALLIE, CAN YOU HEAR ME?

HI, AL!

IT'S CARNIVAL, ALISON!

DON'T YOU THINK IT'S GREAT?

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE ALONE WITHOUT SYLVIA?

WHAT?

SHOULDN'T YOU BE AT HOME LOOKING AFTER HER A BIT?

AT HOME?

YES.

HA HA!

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!

YEAH!

YEAH.

YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!

I'LL JUST GO AND GET HER.

IT'S GREAT TO SEE YA, ALLIE! BYE!

BYE.

PISSED OUT OF HIS MIND.

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER...

I WAS JUST TALKING TO A FRIEND ON THE PHONE,

AND SHE SAID SHE SAW YOU TODAY.

[BLOWING WHISTLE MUSICALLY]

HI.

[SHUTS DOOR]

HIYA.

UH, I WAS JUST TALKING TO A FRIEND ON THE PHONE.

AND SHE SAID SHE SAW YOU TODAY.

VIC...

PLEASE.

SLAP ME IN THE FACE.

WHY?

THERE'S NOTHING WRONG, NOTHING WRONG.

JUST SLAP ME IN THE FACE...HARD.

OK.PLEASE?

SORRY.

YOU'RE STILL HERE.

YEAH.

YOU'RE STILL HERE.

I'M STILL HERE.

"YOUR HEART IS A KITE TANGLED IN A TREE.

GO AND DISENTANGLE IT."

YOU'RE DRUNK.

I AM.

AND YOU'RE WET.

I FELL IN A PUDDLE AT THE CARNIVAL.

YOU WENT TO CARNIVAL?

YEAH, I WENT TO THE CARNIVAL.

LIKE THIS?

YEAH.

ARE YOU HOT?

I'M ROASTING.

WHOOPS.

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER, LEADER, LEADER ♪

♪ FOLLOW THE LEADER ♪

♪ JUMP AND WAVE

♪ EVERYBODY, JUMP AND WAVE ♪

YOU HATETHE CARNIVAL.

I DON'T ANYMORE.

I LOVE YOU.

MMM. I LOVE YOU, TOO.

DO YOU?

MM-HMM.

OOF.

SYLVIA...

WILL YOU MARRY ME?

OW!

OW!

YOU ARE SODRUNK.

I KNOW, BUT--BUT WILL YOU MARRY ME?

OH!

[BOTH GIGGLING]

[TICKING]

PLEASE.

"VIC.

"DIDN'T WANT TO WAKE YOU.

HAVE A SWEET HANGOVER..." HMM.

"AND A GOOD REHEARSAL."

GOOD REHEARSAL?

SHITE!

Carol: REPENTANCE, EMILIO. I WANT REPENTANCE.

I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU HAVE BETRAYED US,

BUT BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T REPENTED FROM THE HEART.

THERE HE IS.

Director: OH, MY. VICTOR.

VICTOR. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

WE'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU ALL MORNING, VICTOR.

UM, UM, SORRY I'M LATE, EVERYBODY,

I--I REALLY AM.

Man: HEY, VIC, HOW'S IT GOING?

IT'S REALLY GREAT TO SEE YOU.

ARE YOU OK?

I AM FANTASTIC.

CHRISTINA. HIYA.

HI, VICTOR.

L-LISA. AND--AND MARK.

HELLO, VIC.

AND NATHAN. HI.

AND...JAMES.

IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

AGAIN?

I ONLY SAW YOU YESTERDAY.

WELL, IT'S STILL GREAT TO SEE YOU.

AHH, GIVE ME ANOTHER HUG.

[LAUGHING]

HI.

HI.

YOU'RE WEIRD.

I KNOW. HI, BOBBY.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?

HI.

WHAT--WHAT'S GOING ON?

Victor: WE HAVE TO TALK.

HAVE YOU TOLD HER?

NO. I HAVEN'T TOLD HER, AND I'M NOT GOING TO.

WHAT? BUT YOU SAID YOU WOULD.

I'VE CHANGED MY MIND.

I'VE THOUGHT IT THROUGH, AND I'VE DECIDED

THAT WE HAVE TO STOP SEEING EACH OTHER.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

I-I'M SORRY IF I'VE MISLED YOU.

MISLED ME?

FUCKING BASTARD!

LISTEN, CAROL.

IT WOULDN'T HAVE WORKED. TRUST ME.

YOU WOULD HAVE GOT REALLY BORED WITH ME

REALLY SOON. I KNOW IT.

WE WOULD HAVE GONE AWAY TO THE COUNTRY ONE DAY,

TO SUSSEX, AND YOU WOULD HAVE SAID TO ME--

YOU'RE A FUCKING BLOODY BASTARD!

NO, NO, NOT AT FIRST.

FIRST, YOU WOULD HAVE SAID TO ME OVER BREAKFAST,

"VIC, DO YOU REALIZE HOW LITTLE WE HAVE IN COMMON?

WE DON'T EVEN SPEAK THE SAME LANGUAGE."

Director: LET'S GET BACK TO WORK.

YOU WOULD HAVE GOT ON THE FIRST TRAIN BACK TO LONDON,

THEN WE'D NEVER HAVE SEEN EACH OTHER EVER AGAIN.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!

Director: COME ON, WE ARE ALL WAITING.

TRUST ME. I'VE BEEN THERE BEFORE.

YOU SCUM!

OK, EVERYBODY.

SHH.

POSITIONS.

YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GOING TO GET

A REALLY GOOD PART IN A FILM AFTER THIS.

IT'S A JAMES BOND FILM.

AND, UH, YOU GET TO SNOG PIERCE BROSNAN.

Director: VICTOR?

WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?

[MUFFLED] WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT?

REPENTANCE...

EMILIO.

I WANT REPENTANCE.

I'M NOT GOING TO KILL YOU BECAUSE YOU'VE BETRAYED US.

I'M GOING TO SHOOT YOU IN THE BALLS

BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T REPENTED FROM THE HEART.

MARIA... YOU CAN'T DO THIS.

OH, YES, I CAN.

I MYSELF VOLUNTEERED TO CARRY IT OUT!

OOF!

[WHISPERING] Very good.

DID YOU LIKE THAT POWER?

DID YOU ENJOY PLAYING GOD?

Very good, Carol.

[MUMBLING]

SO WAS IT FUN TO CRUSH THE DREAMS

YOU ONCE SHARED WITH US WITH YOUR OWN FINGERS?

Director: Yes.

WAS IT? WAS IT FUN TO SEE US RUN LIKE ANTS

UNDER THE SHADOW OF YOUR SHOE?

VERY GOOD. VERY...

WAS IT, VIC?! WAS IT, VIC?!

PIECE OF SHIT!

WHOO! WHOO!

[PEOPLE CHEERING]

[GROANS]

GRAZIE!

WELL, I'M IMPRESSED, VIC.

[CHUCKLES]

THIS IS GOOD.

MM-HMM.

REALLY GOOD.

CAN I TEMPT YOU INTO SNIFFING THE CORK?

AND YOU'VE TIDIED UP.

YUP.

WHY'S YOUR GUITAR UP THERE?

HOW DID THINGS GO WITH YOUR PATIENTS TODAY?

GOD, I HAD ALAN TODAY.

CLAUSTROPHOBIA.

I HAD TO TAKE HIM ON THE TUBE.

IT WAS REALLY DIFFICULT.

OH, REALLY? GOD.

HANG ON.

YOU'VE NEVER BEEN INTERESTED IN MY WORK.

NO, I'M INTERESTED. I'M--I'M REALLY INTERESTED.

YEAH, OK.

UM, "PSYCHOLOGY IS A FASCINATING JOURNEY

ON A DEAD-END STREET."

WHO SAID THAT?

OH, AYE, BUT, WELL, YOU KNOW...

I MUST HAVE BEEN JOKING.

AFTER 6 YEARS WITH YOU,

I THINK I KNOW PERFECTLY WELL WHEN YOU'RE JOKING.

NO, REALLY, I THINK THAT NOT ONLY IS PSYCHOLOGY INTERESTING,

BUT IT'S ALSO VERY IMPORTANT.

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, AS AN ACTOR,

HOW ELSE COULD I GET INTO THE HEARTS AND MINDS OF,

YOU KNOW, THE CHARACTERS THAT I PLAY IN

AND UNDERSTAND THEIR WEE FOIBLES AND--

LEAVE IT, VIC. YOU'RE NOT ON A STAGE.

ALL RIGHT.

ARE YOU, UM, WORKING AT THE BOOKSHOP THIS WEEKEND?

BOOKSHOP? WHAT BOOKSHOP?

BOOKSHOP, YEAH. MM-HMM.

VIC?

MM-HMM.

ARE YOU HAVING AN AFFAIR?

WHAT?

I MEAN, ARE YOU HAVING AN AFFAIR?

ARE YOU SEEING SOMEONE ELSE?

BECAUSE IF YOU ARE, YOU SHOULD TELL ME.

WHAT GAVE YOU THAT IDEA?

BECAUSE YOU'VE BEEN ACTING

REALLY WEIRD LATELY.

YOU'RE DISTANT,

AND YOU'RE COLD EXCEPT FOR YESTERDAY

WHEN YOU WERE DRUNK.

AND WE HAVEN'T MADE LOVE IN AGES.

SO, DON'T LIE TO ME.

I PROMISE YOU

I'M NOT HAVING AN AFFAIR.

I'M NOT SEEING ANYONE.

I'M NOT EVEN IMAGINING

THE REMOTEST POSSIBILITY OF ANYBODY ELSE.

SO WHAT'S WRONG?

I DON'T KNOW.

I SUPPOSE IT'S MY CAREER REALLY.

I--I DON'T KNOW WHY.

I JUST DON'T REALLY SEE IT GOING ANYWHERE

IN THE NEXT KINDA...

8 MONTHS.

[CHUCKLES]

SO I'M A BIT KINDA CONFUSED AS TO, YOU KNOW,

WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING.

I MEAN, MAYBE YOU WERE RIGHT.

MAYBE, YOU KNOW, I SHOULD TRY SOMETHING ELSE MAYBE.

DO SOMETHING ELSE.

I NEVER SAID THAT.

BUT YOU WILL.

YOU--YOU WILL.

YOU--YOU--YOU WILL.

YOU WILL.

CAN I SAY SOMETHING TO YOU?

MM-HMM.

I KNOW THAT OVER THE PAST FEW YEARS

I'VE BEEN A WEE BIT SELFISH.

I PROMISE YOU I'LL TRY AND CHANGE.

LET'S GO IN THERE.

GO IN THERE. OK.

YEAH.

YOU SHOULDN'T TRUST HIM.

NO, YOU'D BE AMAZED.

HE REALLY HAS CHANGED.

MMM. I WOULDN'T BE SO SURE.

HE IS AN ACTOR, REMEMBER?

OOH, WHAT DO YOU THINK?

NAH.

IT'S INCREDIBLE.

HE'S DOING EVERYTHING I WANT.

HE'S PROBABLY FEELING GUILTY ABOUT SOMETHING.

HE'S TALKING ABOUT HAVING CHILDREN.

GETTING MARRIED, SETTLING DOWN.

THINGS HE NEVER WANTED TO DISCUSS.

WILL YOU HOLD UP THAT MIRROR?

BUT HE'S ALWAYS BEEN VERY GOOD AT TALKING, HASN'T HE?

IT'S THE FACTS WE WANT.

HE'S STOPPED SMOKING.

HAS HE?

MM-HMM. HMM.

HI. I'M LATE.

GOING JOGGING?

NO. TO THE GYM.

TO THE GYM? WAIT.

WHAT GYM?

ALISON TOLD ME ABOUT THIS GREAT GYM,

SO I'M GONNA GO AND MEET HER.

NO. YOU CAN'T GO.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T GO?

NO, WHAT I MEAN IS THAT YOU DON'T NEED TO GO.

YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL.

YOU'RE PERFECTLY ALL RIGHT AS YOU ARE.

YEAH, ALISON, ALISON ONLY GOES

BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS,

AND YOU'VE GOT LOTS OF FRIENDS

AND A BEAUTIFUL BODY,

SO YOU DON'T NEED TO GO TO A GYM.

NO, I DO.

AND BESIDES, IT'LL TAKE MY MIND OFF WORK.

WELL, YEAH, BUT NOT IN A GYM.

I MEAN, GYMS, THEY'RE BAD FOR YOU.

THEY TAKE YOUR MIND OFF COMPLETELY.

YOU'LL STOP THINKING ALTOGETHER.

HONESTLY.

THEY'RE FULL OF NARCISSISTIC WANKERS

WHO SPEND ALL DAY RAISING WEIGHTS

'CAUSE THEY CAN'T RAISE A HARD-ON.

YOU'RE RIGHT.

MMM.

MAYBE I'LL FIND MYSELF A REALLY GORGEOUS MAN.

YOU'RE MAKING THE MISTAKE OF YOUR LIFE.

OH, MY GOD.

[BUJU BANTON PERFORMING WANNA BE LOVED]

♪ NOW, WHERE COULD IT BE?

♪ MUST BE SOMEWHERE FOR ME

DON'T SHUT THE DOOR!

♪ BOM BOM

♪ I WANNA BE LOVED

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM ♪

♪ NOR WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE ♪

♪ COULD YOU LOVE ME FOR ME? ♪

♪ REAL LOVE

♪ WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED ♪

♪ I WANNA GIVE YOU MY HEART ♪

FUCK!

♪ THIS IS MY CHAT

♪ CHO

♪ BEEN SEARCHING A LONG, LONG TIME ♪

HEY!

[CHUCKLES] VIC.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

SHALL WE GO FOR A RUN IN THE PARK? HUH?

IT'S SUCH A BEAUTIFUL DAY.

YOU DON'T WANT TO LOCK YOURSELF AWAY IN A GYM.

YEAH, BUT YOU'RE WEARING MY CLOTHES.

I KNOW. I COULDN'T FIND MY SPORTS CLOTHES.

'CAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE ANY.

LOOK, I CAN'T STOP NOW.

YOU WANNA GO? COME ON. HUH?

[CHUCKLES] YOU LOOK KNACKERED.

I'M NOT. HONESTLY. I'M FINE.

I WAS THINKING I MIGHT DO THE MARATHON

THIS YEAR, ACTUALLY.

YEAH? YEAH.

SO LAST ONE INTO THE PARK

DOES THE HOOVERING FOR A MONTH.

YOU'RE ON.

RIGHT. COME ON.

[BUJU BANTON PERFORMING WANNA BE LOVED]

♪ NOW, WHERE COULD IT BE?

♪ MUST BE SOMEWHERE FOR ME

♪ I NEED IT DESPERATELY

[SYLVIA LAUGHS]

♪ I WANNA BE LOVED

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM ♪

♪ NOR WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE ♪

♪ COULD YOU LOVE ME FOR ME? ♪

♪ REAL LOVE

YOU SAID YOU COULD DO THIS TWICE A WEEK.

♪ I WANNA GIVE YOU MY HEART ♪

♪ DON'T WANT TO TAKE IT BACK ♪

♪ THIS IS MY CHAT, CHO

♪ WANNA BE LOVED

♪ NOT FOR WHO YOU THINK I AM ♪

♪ NOR WHAT YOU WANT ME TO BE ♪

♪ COULD YOU LOVE ME FOR ME? ♪

♪ REAL LOVE

♪ WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED

♪ I WANNA GIVE YOU MY HEART ♪

♪ DON'T WANT TO

♪ WELL, EVERY HOE HAVE ITS STICK IN A BUSH ♪

♪ WHAT HAPPEN TO ME

♪ SHE MUST BE SOMEWHERE OUT THERE ♪

♪ NOW WHERE COULD SHE BE?

Freddy: SHE'S WEARING THE TROUSERS.

OH, COME ON.

IT'S TRUE. EVER SINCE YOU FINISHED WITH CAROL,

YOU LET HER TAKE THE REINS.

THAT'S RUBBISH.

AH, WELL, THEN HOW COME YOU'RE ALWAYS OUT

WITH HER FRIENDS AND NOT WITH US?

HOW COME YOU'RE READING

ALL THOSE BORING PSYCHOLOGY BOOKS, HUH?

I MEAN, YOU DON'T EVEN DARE SMOKE IN FRONT OF HER.

IT'S NO BIG DEAL.

COURSE IT IS.

WOMEN LIKE TO BE SHOWN THE WAY.

THEY LIKE THEIR MEN TO TAKE THE DECISIONS,

TO TAKE THE INITIATIVE.

ISN'T THAT RIGHT, BABY? AAH!

YOU SEE?

THEY LOVE IT.

YOU NEED TO CHANGE TACTICS.

YOU NEED TO GET THE OLD VIC BACK.

YOU KNOW, DON'T GIVE HER TOO MUCH.

JUST ENOUGH TO KEEP HER HAPPY

BUT HUNGRY FOR MORE.

'CAUSE IF YOU LET THEM HAVE TOO MUCH,

WELL, THEN THEY JUST START SEARCHING

FOR SOMETHING NEW.

ISN'T THAT RIGHT, GIRLS?

HA HA HA!

HEY, HEY. DO YOU KNOW WHO THIS GUY IS?

READY, VICTOR?

THIS CAME FOR YOU.

RIGHT.

CURTAIN'S UP IN 2 MINUTES.

I KNOW. CALM, CALM.

IT'S OK. ENERGY.

CALM, CALM.

Director: I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THIS.

ENERGY.

[BUZZ BUZZ]

[FEEDBACK]

Sean: WHAT'S HIS NAME, BEEKOWSKI OR BELLKOWSKI,

THIS NEW BRANDO YOU'RE TELLING ME ABOUT?

SHH.

[THUNDER]

AAH! Shut up!

Director: BRAVO!

[CHEERING]

Victor: WELL DONE.

NICE ONE, VICTOR.

GOOD ONE.

WHOO!

JESUS.

MARAVIGLIOSO. MARAVIGLIOSO.

YOU WERE...

FABULOUS.

WONDERFUL. WONDERFUL, WONDERFUL.

THANK YOU. YOU ARE A GENIUS.

MARAVIGLIOSO, MARAVIGLIOSO!

[LAUGHS]

AAH!

ALL RIGHT? WELL, WHAT, WHAT, WHAT?

IT WAS ALL RIGHT.

WHAT? DON'T TELL ME YOU DIDN'T LIKE IT.

I WAS JUST A LITTLE BIT BORED.

YOU WERE BORED?

IT WAS GREAT!

HA HA HA HA!

AND YOU WERE THE BEST.

SO YOU--YOU LIKED IT?

YEAH. ALL THAT STUFF WITH CAROL WAS BRILLIANT.

I MEAN, DOESN'T SHE LIKE YOU?

NO. NO. IT WAS ALL IN THE TEXT.

Sean: I'M SEAN DALTREY,

PREMIER AGENT TO THE FILM INDUSTRY.

WHERE IS THIS BILLOSKI STAR?

BABY, GET IN THE CUPBOARD.

WHAT?

GET IN THE CUPBOARD.

REALLY?

Sean: I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT NAME.

I CAN MAKE IT RHYME WITH STANISLAVSKI.

James: VIC?

THERE'S SOMEONE TO SEE YOU.

LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONE.

WHAT TIME WERE THEY SUPPOSED TO BE HERE?

NOW.

AND WHO IS THIS GUY THAT SHE'S BRINGING?

IS IT HER NEW BOYFRIEND?

NO, I DON'T THINK SO.

I THINK HE'S JUST SOMEONE

SHE'S SEEN A COUPLE OF TIMES.

I'M GONNA HAVE TO TAKE HIM INTO THE TOILET

AND TELL HIM ALL ABOUT HER.

DON'T BE HORRIBLE.

SHE'S A NICE GIRL.

SHE'S GOT A LOT OF GOOD QUALITIES.

NAME THEM.

OH, THERE THEY ARE. HI.

HI, ALLIE. HI.

SYLVIA.

THIS IS DAVE.

Victor: OH, SHIT, SORRY.

NO, IT'S OK, IT'S OK.

ARE YOU ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. IT'S OK. IT'S NOT TOO BAD.

RIGHT. WE'LL START AGAIN.

THANK YOU.

SYLVIA, THIS IS DAVE.

HI, DAVE.

AND THIS IS VICTOR.

VICTOR.

HI.

WELL, HERE WE ARE.

OH, SYLVIA, YOU LOOK GREAT.

AND YOU, VICTOR, YOU STILL WORKING IN THE SHOP?

YEAH. YOU STILL LIVING IN THE GYM?

HMM. THE BEST PART THOUGH HAS BEEN MEETING DAVE.

HE'S DOING PHYSIOTHERAPY.

HE HURT HIS BACK IN AN ACCIDENT.

WAS IT A BAD INJURY?

NO, NO, IT WASN'T TOO BAD.

UH, THANKS.

I FELL OFF A TRACTOR.

HE'S AN AGRICULTURAL ENGINEER.

HE'S BEEN IN CALCUTTA

HELPING THEM DEVELOP IRRIGATION TECHNIQUES.

AND HAVE YOU GOT A LOT MORE PHYSIO TO DO?

NO, NO. THANK GOD.

ONLY GOT A COUPLE OF MONTHS.

I HATE GYMS.

THEY'RE FULL OF NARCISSISTIC IDIOTS.

YEAH, WHO SPEND ALL DAY RAISING WEIGHTS TO COMPENSATE

FOR THE FACT THEY CAN'T RAISE THEIR PENISES.

IS THAT WHAT YOU WERE GONNA SAY?

YEAH. SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

[ALISON LAUGHS]

WELL, IF YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND THE MENU,

JUST ASK DAVE. HE'S THE EXPERT.

WELL, THAT'S GOOD. SO, UM...

WHAT DO YOU RECOMMEND?

IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT TOO HOT,

TRY THE BADAMI KORMA.

MM-HMM.

UH, VICTOR. VICTOR?

WHAT?

TRY THE...[SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

THE WHAT?

IT'S GOAT'S TESTICLES.

VERY GOOD FOR THE PULSE.

UH, I NEED TO GO TO THE LOO.

WILL YOU EXCUSE ME A MINUTE?

YEAH.

YEAH, I THINK I'LL JOIN YOU.

NO, LOOK, YOU STAY HERE WITH ME.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

YEAH.

Dave: I REALLY THINK ACCIDENTS

HAPPEN FOR A REASON.

THEY'RE NOT JUST BAD LUCK.

I THINK THIS ACCIDENT

WAS TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING.

ALTHOUGH IT WILL PROBABLY TAKE ME A WHILE

TO FIND OUT WHAT IT IS.

BUT I KNOW THERE WAS AN IMPORTANT REASON

FOR ME TO COME BACK.

WHY DID YOU DECIDE TO GO TO INDIA IN THE FIRST PLACE?

OH, I GOT TIRED OF BUILDING GOLF COURSES

FOR RICH PEOPLE IN SCOTLAND.

I THOUGHT I COULD DO SOMETHING MORE USEFUL

WITH MY LIFE.

AND WHY INDIA?

UM, I WANTED TO GET AWAY.

I'D JUST COME OUT OF A LONG RELATIONSHIP.

I WANTED SOMETHING VERY DIFFERENT.

AS IT WAS, I LOVED IT. I'D LOVE TO GO BACK,

SETTLE DOWN THERE IN THE FUTURE.

WHY DON'T YOU GO NOW?

WELL, BECAUSE I'VE BECOME INVOLVED

IN A REFORESTATION PROGRAM OUTSIDE NEWBURY.

IT'S MY HOMETOWN.

LOOKS LIKE IT'S GONNA GO ON FOR A WHILE.

THAT'S THE TROUBLE WITH THESE JOBS.

YOU GET SUCKED INTO THEM AND YOU CAN'T LEAVE THEM.

MMM.

I SHOULD IMAGINE IT'S A BIT LIKE THAT

WITH YOUR PATIENTS.

YOU'RE A PSYCHOLOGIST, AREN'T YOU?

MM-HMM.

ONCE YOU START TREATING SOMEONE

YOU CAN'T LEAVE THEM TILL THEY'RE CURED.

YEAH, SOMETIMES I WONDER WHETHER SOME OF THEM WILL EVER BE CURED.

YEAH, SHE HAS TO WORK WITH ALL THESE MADMEN.

IT MUST BE SO SCARY.

I'M SURE SOME OF THEM

ARE POTENTIAL RAPISTS OR SERIAL KILLERS.

I THINK THE PSYCHOLOGISTS

ARE THE REAL SCARY ONES.

THIS IS REALLY DELICIOUS.

Victor: DID YOU SEE THE WAY THAT GUY WAS LOOKING AT YOU?

Sylvia: REALLY?

YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO BE REALLY CAREFUL,

BECAUSE HE LOOKS LIKE A STALKER.

[CHUCKLES] DON'T BE SILLY.

I MEAN, "I THINK PSYCHOLOGISTS THEMSELVES

ARE THE REAL SCARY ONES."

I MEAN, WHAT A CONTEMPTUOUS ATTITUDE

TOWARD PSYCHOLOGY.

VIC, HE WAS ONLY JOKING.

I'M SURPRISED YOU DIDN'T LIKE HIM,

'CAUSE HIS SENSE OF HUMOR IS A BIT LIKE YOURS.

WHAT?!

LIKE MINE?

OH, COME ON, HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?

HE DOESN'T HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOR.

OH, RIGHT, IS THAT WHAT YOU MEAN?

AND ALL THAT... SORRY.

INJURY SHITE.

I MEAN, THE ONLY REASON HE CAME BACK

WAS BECAUSE HE'S OBVIOUSLY STILL IN LOVE

WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND,

BUT SHE DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIM,

BECAUSE HE'S SUCH A WANKER.

[SIGHS]

YOU KNOW, IT'S FUNNY.

I THOUGHT IT WAS BECAUSE OF ALISON

YOU WERE SO SULKY.

AH, YEAH, ALISON'S ALMOST LIKABLE

COMPARED TO HIM.

GOD.

DID HE GIVE YOU HIS PHONE NUMBER

WHEN I WAS IN THE TOILET?

NO, HE DID NOT. WHY WOULD HE?

BECAUSE YOU WERE DOING BAMBI IMPRESSIONS

EVERY TIME HE SO MUCH AS GLANCED AT YOU.

I WAS JUST BEING POLITE.

OH, REALLY?

AND HE WASN'T MUCH BETTER.

I MEAN, DIDN'T HE ASK YOU,

"WHERE DID YOU GET YOUR BLOUSON?"

YEAH.

AND WASN'T HE ALWAYS SERVING YOU WINE

BEFORE ALISON?

YEAH, BECAUSE HE WAS SITTING OPPOSITE ME, VIC.

AND DIDN'T HE ASK YOU

WHETHER YOU'D SEEN THAT PROGRAM ON CHANNEL 4

ABOUT PSYCHOLOGISTS PLANTING MEMORIES?

YES!

WELL, THERE. I REST MY CASE.

ALL RIGHT. OK, I CHANGED MY MIND.

DON'T YOU THINK THAT HIM AND ALISON

MAKE A PERFECT COUPLE?

[MUMBLES]

HI.

HI.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

I WAS, UH, JUST LOOKING FOR ALISON.

OH, SHE LEFT ABOUT HALF AN HOUR AGO.

I THINK SHE'S GONE HOME.

OH, WELL, NEVER MIND.

I WASN'T SURE I WAS GONNA COME ANYWAY.

DAVE...

HOW'S YOUR PATIENTS?

HOW'S YOUR BACK?

UH, YEAH, MY BACK'S FINE.

WHAT WAS IT YOU SAID THE OTHER DAY

ABOUT PSYCHOLOGISTS BEING SCARY?

OH, NO, I'M SORRY. THAT WAS A STUPID THING TO SAY.

I'VE GOT NOTHING AGAINST PSYCHOLOGISTS.

I ADMIRE THEM.

HONESTLY, I'D LOVE TO DO WHAT YOU DO.

WHAT?

HELP PEOPLE.

I MEAN, SPIRITUALLY WITH THEIR FRUSTRATIONS,

THEIR PROBLEMS.

I BASICALLY GROW PLANTS AND FOOD.

YOU MAKE PEOPLE GROW. THAT'S MORE REWARDING.

WELL, IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU.

IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU, TOO.

UH, SYLVIA?

YEAH?

DO YOU, UM...

DO YOU WANT TO GO FOR A DRINK SOMEWHERE?

ALL RIGHT.

[SELIF KEITA SINGING NAYANAMA]

I'LL SEE YOU.

HEY, CINDERELLA.

HEY, SYLVIA.

THERE'S SOMEBODY WAITING FOR YOU DOWNSTAIRS.

I KNOW.

[WHISTLING]

FUCK.

HI.

HIYA.

UM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?

2 TICKETS.

RADIOHEAD. BRIXTON ACADEMY.

TONIGHT.

I THOUGHT YOU WERE SEEING FREDDY TONIGHT.

WELL, YEAH, I MEAN, I WAS GOING TO,

BUT THEN I THOUGHT OF THIS.

HOW DID YOU GET THEM?

I QUEUED FOR RETURNS.

ARE YOU SURE THEY'RE FOR TONIGHT?

'CAUSE I KNOW THEY WERE PLAYING 3 NIGHTS.

SYLVIA...TONIGHT.

WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME?

BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE A NICE SURPRISE.

OH, IT IS.

IT'S GREAT. IT'S JUST THAT I DIDN'T EXPECT IT.

WELL, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO EXPECT SURPRISES, ARE--

[WHISTLES]

DOES THAT MEAN YOU'RE HAPPY ABOUT IT?

WHAT?

WE--WE SHOULD GO, DARLING,

OR WE'RE GONNA BE LATE.

NO. MMM.

Victor: WHAT?

NOTHING.

SHALL WE GO?

YEAH. I JUST LEFT SOMETHING UPSTAIRS.

I WON'T BE A MINUTE.

[SIGHS]

WHAT?

LOOK, HI. I'M SORRY.

HE'S JUST TURNED UP

WITH 2 TICKETS FOR RADIOHEAD,

AND THEY'RE MY FAVORITE BAND,

SO I COULDN'T SAY NO.

OH, NO.

BUT I CAN DEFINITELY SEE YOU TOMORROW,

LUNCHTIME OR AFTER WORK OR WHENEVER.

YEAH, OK. WE'VE GOT TO TALK, OK?

YEAH.

[WHISTLING]

[WHISTLING]

BYE.

WHAT'S THE MATTER?

NOTHING.

I SUDDENLY REMEMBERED THE FUTURE.

[SIREN]

EXCUSE ME. I'M LOOKING FOR THIS BOOK.

WELL, I WOULDN'T. IT'S RUBBISH.

IS IT?

YEAH.

OH, WELL, IT'S NOT FOR ME. IT'S FOR MY BOYFRIEND.

IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY.

I KNOW HE PARTICULARLY LIKES THIS WRITER.

WELL, IT REALLY IS CRAP.

I DON'T CARE. I KNOW HE'LL LIKE IT.

AND I CAN'T REALLY AFFORD

TO GET IT WRONG, YOU SEE.

GOD, YOU SOUND LIKE ME.

WHY ARE YOU GOING SO EARLY?

WELL, I SAID I'D MEET VIC AT THE BOOKSHOP,

AND WE'D GO AND SEE A FILM.

WHAT FILM?

I DON'T KNOW.

BUT NOW HE ALWAYS LETS ME CHOOSE.

I MEAN, LIKE THE OTHER DAY,

I TOOK HIM TO SEE A HUNGARIAN FILM.

NORMALLY, I WOULD HAVE GOT A LECTURE ON PRETENTIOUS FILMS

AND BEEN PUNISHED WITH WASHING UP

FOR 2 DAYS IN A ROW

OR LENDING HIM HIS FAVORITE JACKET--

WHICH IS MINE.

BUT THIS TIME HE LET ME OFF.

Dave: THINK HE KNOWS?

NO.

Victor: I THINK SHE'S HAVING AN AFFAIR.

REALLY? THAT'S TRICKY.

YEAH, IT IS TRICKY.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

EVERY SINGLE DAY,

I TRY AND THINK OF A DIFFERENT APPROACH,

AND I ALWAYS END UP SAYING THE WRONG THING.

Dave: WHY DON'T YOU GIVE HIM A CALL?

TELL HIM... YOU HAVE TO WORK LATE.

AND THAT YOU'LL GO TO THE PICTURES TOMORROW.

I KNOW A REALLY GOOD WAY OF FINDING OUT

WHETHER YOUR PARTNER'S HAVING AN AFFAIR OR NOT.

DO YOU?

OH, MIND YOU, IT'S ONLY FOR GIRLS

WHO SUSPECT THEIR BOYFRIENDS.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

WELL, TRY ME, IT MIGHT WORK.

HI.

LOOK, YOU'RE PROBABLY GONNA THINK I'M MAD,

BUT I WAS TIDYING UP THE ROOM

AND I PICKED UP ONE OF YOUR JACKETS

AND A PAIR OF GUY'S PANTS

FELL OUT ON THE FLOOR AND THEY WEREN'T MINE.

PAIR OF GUY'S PANTS?

WHICH WEREN'T YOURS?

YEAH. THEY WEREN'T VERY CLEAN, EITHER.

CAN I SEE THESE PANTS?

NO, YOU CAN'T, 'CAUSE I PUT THEM IN THE WASH.

AND YOU'RE SURE THEY'RE NOT YOURS?

DARLING, I THINK I'D RECOGNIZE MY OWN PANTS.

HMM.

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

I MEAN, HOW CAN A PAIR OF GUY'S PANTS

WHICH AREN'T YOURS

GET INTO MY JACKET POCKET?

UNLESS ONE OF MY SEXUALLY DERANGED PATIENTS

PUT THEM THERE.

OH, GOD, YOU PROBABLY THINK

I'M HAVING AN AFFAIR OR SOMETHING.

WELL, I MEAN, YOU CAN UNDERSTAND.

YEAH.

PROBABLY JUST ONE OF YOUR PATIENTS

PUT THEM THERE, THOUGH, EH?

MMM.

LOOK, ANYWAY, LET'S JUST FORGET ABOUT IT.

YEAH.

I'M SORRY IF IT SOUNDED LIKE I DIDN'T TRUST YOU.

TIDYING UP THE ROOM.

HUH. WHAT A MESS.

IT'S BROKEN.

YEAH.

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE, VIC.

I CAN'T LIE TO YOU.

[SIGHS]

I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

I'M MOVING OUT.

Victor: THAT'S REALLY NICE STUFF YOU'RE PLAYING.

Pianist: SHE LIKES IT, TOO.

WHO? THE BARMAID?

NO, NO. SHE.

THE MOON.

THE MOON?

YEAH, MAN.

DON'T YOU SEE HER SITTING ON TOP OF MY PIANO?

SHE ALWAYS COMES DOWN TO LISTEN TO ME PLAY.

YEAH. I CAN SEE HER.

NO. SHE'S GONE NOW.

YOU SCARED HER.

SORRY.

IT'S OK. SHE'LL COME BACK WHEN I START PLAYING AGAIN.

YOU GOT A CIGARETTE?

YEAH, SURE.

HAVEN'T SEEN YOU HERE BEFORE.

LOOK...

IS THERE A RED-HAIRED WOMAN WORKS IN HERE?

ABOUT 30?

BLUE EYES.

NO. THERE'S ONLY LOUISE,

SHE ONLY STARTED A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO.

[GLASS BREAKS]

I DON'T THINK SHE WAS MADE FOR BARTENDING.

IT'S SO STRANGE.

I'M SURE I SAW HER HERE.

SHE WAS STANDING OVER THERE RIGHT BEHIND THE BAR.

[LAUGHS]

MAN, YOU REALLY ARE SEEING THINGS, AREN'T YOU?

I MUST BE SEEING THINGS.

EXCUSE ME.

I'VE ALREADY ASKED THE PIANIST,

BUT I'M NOT SURE WHETHER OR NOT I TRUST HIS EYESIGHT.

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

IS THERE A RED-HAIRED WOMAN WORKS IN HERE?

ABOUT 30. BLUE EYES. VERY BEAUTIFUL.

NO.

ARE YOU SURE THIS IS THE RIGHT BAR?

YEAH, I'M SURE.

UM, WE HAD A LONG CHAT ONE NIGHT.

SHE WAS VERY SPECIAL.

SHE GAVE ME THIS.

CAN I SEE IT?

IT'S NOT MUCH USE.

YEAH. WELL, IT WAS RAINING REALLY HARD THAT NIGHT.

BUT SHE'S OBVIOUSLY NOT HERE YET.

YET?

IT'S A LONG STORY.

I'D BETTER GO. GOOD NIGHT.

GOOD LUCK.

Janice: HERE'S TO YOUR FLAT.

YEAH, THANK YOU.

HOW ARE THINGS WITH DAVE?

GOOD. IT'S GOOD.

I MEAN, THERE'S NO PRESSURE.

WE DON'T ASK EACH OTHER QUESTIONS,

SO JUST ENJOY EACH OTHER'S COMPANY.

GREAT. THAT'S REALLY GREAT.

HAVE YOU HEARD FROM VIC?

NO.

Sylvia: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? HE HASN'T EVEN PHONED.

Sylvia: I THINK HE'S ACTUALLY ACCEPTED IT.

I THOUGHT I'D BE BESIEGED BY HIM,

AND AS ALWAYS, THE ONLY THING

I CAN'T FIND AN EXPLANATION FOR IS VIC'S BEHAVIOR.

I HOPE HE'S OK.

I SHOULD RING HIM, BUT I THINK IT'S TOO EARLY.

YEAH. JUST GIVE HIM A LITTLE BIT MORE TIME.

I HOPE AFTER EVERYTHING, WE CAN STILL BE FRIENDS.

'CAUSE WE WERE ALWAYS REALLY GOOD FRIENDS.

YEAH, YOU WERE.

[LAUGHS]

CHEERS TO YOU.

OI, MATE?

CAN YOU GET ME A BOURBON FROM THE BAR?

YEAH, SURE.

HI. HI.

A BOURBON FOR THE MAESTRO, PLEASE.

OF COURSE. CAN I GET YOU SOMETHING?

ALL RIGHT. I'LL HAVE A VODKA AND TONIC, PLEASE.

OK.

WHOO. MMM.

IS THAT VERY STRONG?

UH-HUH. IT'S OK.

SORRY.

YOU HAVEN'T DONE VERY MUCH BAR WORK BEFORE, HAVE YOU?

NO.

IN FACT, I'M REALLY A WRITER.

THE REASON WHY I TOOK THIS JOB

IS THAT THE MAIN CHARACTER OF THE NOVEL I'M WRITING

WORKS IN A BAR.

I UNDERSTAND, BECAUSE I'M AN ACTOR...

AND I'M WORKING IN A BOOKSHOP JUST NOW

BECAUSE THE CHARACTER I'M GONNA PLAY

IN MY NEXT FILM IS A LIBRARIAN.

MMM. HMM?

I ALSO NEED THE MONEY.

[LAUGHS] ME, TOO.

I'M VICTOR, BY THE WAY.

I'M LOUISE.

WELL, ACTUALLY, MY REAL NAME IS LUISA,

BUT PEOPLE FIND IT HARD TO PRONOUNCE PROPERLY.

WHERE ARE YOU FROM?

I'M FROM CORDOBA IN SPAIN.

SPANISH?

YA EN LOS NIDOS DE ANTAÑO...

NO HAY... NO HAY...

PáRAJOSPáRAJOS HOGANO.HOGANO.

WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MAN?

IT MEANS DON'T LOOK FOR THIS YEAR'S BIRDS

IN LAST YEAR'S NESTS.

IT'S FROM DON QUIXOTE.

WHERE DID YOU HEAR IT?

I THINK I DREAMED IT.

LIKE YOUR RED-HAIRED WOMAN?

DID YOU DREAM HER, TOO?

THE RED-HAIRED WOMAN AND DON QUIXOTE

ARE ALL PART OF THE SAME STORY.

DON QUIXOTE.

DON QUIXOTE.

"THE KNIGHT OF THE SORROWFUL FIGURE."

IN THE END, HE DIED IN HIS BED OF MELANCHOLIA,

HATING THE BOOKS OF CHIVALRY

AND BLAMING THEM FOR HIS MADNESS.

HEY! HMM?

DON'T FALL ASLEEP.

YOU STILL HAVEN'T TOLD ME ABOUT THAT BEAUTIFUL

RED-HAIRED WOMAN YOU ARE LOOKING FOR.

I CAN'T ACTUALLY TELL YOU ABOUT HER,

BECAUSE IF I DO, THEN I'LL BREAK THE SPELL.

LOUISE...

I'M GONNA GIVE YOU A PAY RISE

SO YOU CAN AFFORD YOUR BREAKAGES.

SORRY.

I THINK I'D BETTER GO HOME.

DO YOU LIVE NEARBY?

JUST ACROSS THE ROAD.

WILL YOU BE OK?

I'LL BE FINE.

OH! I'M OK.

Louise: REALLY? ARE YOU SURE?

ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY.

[THUD]

DON'T WORRY, LOU. I'LL TAKE CARE OF THE REST.

OK. IT'S OK. I'M ABSOLUTELY FINE.

IT'S OK.

THANK YOU. SEE YOU TOMORROW.

BYE.

WAIT A MINUTE.

DID YOU SEE THAT?

WHAT?

THE MOON.

DID YOU SEE IT?

ANDA. VAMOS.

[CHUCKLING]

WHERE DO YOU LIVE?

UM...

AAH!

HA HA HA!

[HOWLING]

[SNORING]

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

Louise: HELLO, VICTOR, IT'S LOUISE.

WE MET LAST NIGHT AT LENNY'S IN CASE YOU DON'T REMEMBER.

REMEMBER THE FILM I TOLD YOU ABOUT YESTERDAY?

WELL, IT'S ON AT THE RITZY,

AND I THOUGHT MAYBE YOU'D LIKE TO COME WITH ME

TO THE AFTERNOON PERFORMANCE BEFORE I GO TO WORK.

IT WAS REALLY, REALLY NICE TALKING TO YOU YESTERDAY.

I'LL LEAVE YOU MY NUMBER IF YOU ARRIVE HOME BEFORE 3:00.

IT'S 0171-166-9327.

AND IN CASE YOU'RE WONDERING,

NOTHING HAPPENED LAST NIGHT.

[SIGHS]

[DOOR CLOSES]

VETE A LA MIERDA.

HI.

I'VE BEEN FIRED.

WHAT?

I'VE BEEN FIRED. I ARRIVED TONIGHT,

AND THERE IS SOMEBODY ELSE DOING MY JOB,

AND THE MANAGER TELLS ME THEY DON'T NEED ME ANYMORE.

WHY?

I DON'T KNOW. I HAD A BAD DAY YESTERDAY.

I BROKE A FEW GLASSES.

AND THERE'S SOMEBODY ELSE DOING YOUR JOB?

I'M REALLY SORRY.

YOU DIDN'T CALL ME YESTERDAY.

Diane: YOU ALWAYS THINK YOU HAVE SOMETHING SPECIAL.

SOMETHING UNREPEATABLE.

THE ONE AND ONLY TRUE LOVE.

WHY IS IT YOU ALWAYS END UP TELLING THE SAME STORY?

FUNNY THING IS, I THOUGHT I COULD LIVE WITHOUT HER.

I WAS DOING OK WITH MY MUSICAL CAREER.

THEN MY RECORD COMPANY DECIDED TO DROP ME.

REALLY? I'M SURPRISED,

BECAUSE YOU HAVE AN INTERESTING FACE.

THANKS.

I CAN SPOT A CHARISMATIC FACE A MILE OFF.

YEAH, WHAT CAN I DO FOR YOU?

CAN I HELP YOU?

NO.

[SIGHS]

Victor: AW, FUCK.

[SIGHS]

DO YOU WANT TO GET DRUNK?

MMM.

[MUMBLES]

WHAT?

[MUMBLES]

HMM?

[GIGGLES]

[LAUGHS]

HMM.

[SIGHS]

[LOUISE GIGGLES]

[SALIF KEITA SINGING NAYANAMA]

Freddy: YOU STILL HAVEN'T LEARNED.

YOU'LL NEVER GET ANOTHER GIRLFRIEND

TILL YOU CHANGE YOUR ATTITUDE.

YEAH. OH, YEAH?

YOU CAN'T APPROACH A WOMAN YOU FANCY

WITH AN ALL-OR-NOTHING ATTITUDE.

IT'S NOT AS BLACK AND WHITE AS THAT.

THERE'S A LOT OF GRAY GIRLS OUT THERE

GIVE YOU THE SHAG OF YOUR LIFE.

LIFE IS TOO SHORT

FOR ROMANTICS LIKE YOU, MY FRIEND.

YOU BLINK, THEY GO AFTER SOME OTHER GUY

WHO EXPECTS LESS FROM THEM.

WOMEN HAVE CHANGED. THEY'RE MORE LIKE US NOW.

THEY JUST WANT TO HAVE FUN, YOU KNOW?

TRY AND GET THAT INTO YOUR SYSTEM.

OH, DEAR. I'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS.

STILL, IT'S MAN'S CONDITION, I SUPPOSE.

IT'S LIKE WOMEN HAVE TITS.

EXPECT YOU'RE FEELING THE SAME THING.

NO. IT'S ALL RIGHT.

SHOW US YOUR BELLY.

WHAT?

SHOW US YOUR BELLY.

WHAT?

SHOW US YOUR BELLY.

YOU'RE HOLDING THAT IN.

I'M NOT.

I'M NOT! YOU ARE.

THERE'S A GIRL OVER THERE GIVING ME THE EYE.

SHE'S COMING THIS WAY. SHE'S NOT BAD.

SHE'S DEFINITELY COMING THIS WAY.

SHE'S VERY TASTY.

DON'T SAY ANYTHING.

DON'T FUCK IT UP. LEAVE THIS TO ME.

QUé GUAPA.

I SEE THAT YOU DO KNOW WHO THIS GUY IS.

FREDDY, THIS IS LOUISE.

HI. HI.

NICE TO MEET YOU.

SO YOU'RE THE REASON HE HASN'T BEEN NAGGING ME

THE LAST COUPLE OF MONTHS. I LIKE YOU ALREADY.

HOW CAN YOU KEEP THIS QUIET FROM ME?

YOU ALWAYS TELL ME EVERYTHING.

I KNOW.

I HOPE HE TOLD YOU ABOUT HIS AUDITION FOR THE BBC SITCOM.

AN AUDITION FOR A BBC SITCOM?

AH-AH-AH. TOMORROW.

WOW, THAT'S FANTASTIC.

YOU SAID YOU WERE NEVER GONNA DO A SITCOM.

THAT WAS A LONG TIME AGO.

THAT WAS BEFORE I MET LOUISE.

OH.

HUH?

♪ BABY

♪ CAN'T KEEP ON LEARNING ♪

WHAT?

CONTRACEPTION.

OH, MY GOD. HE'S GONE OUT WITHOUT A CONDOM.

♪ ALL I WANT YOU TO DO IS FEEL WITH ME... ♪

DON'T BE SILLY.

CONDOMS ARE OLDER THAN FRANK SINATRA.

♪ YEAH

♪ WE BOTH ARE HURTING

♪ AND IT'S GONNA TAKE A LITTLE TIME ♪

♪ TO HEAL ALL THE WOUNDS... ♪

WHAT, NOW?

♪ ALL I EVER WANTED

TAKE THE CAR.

I'LL SEE YOU BACK AT MY PLACE LATER.

OK.

OK?

♪ REMEMBER CAMPING IN THE MOON LIGHT ♪

♪ HOW WE HELD EACH OTHER ALL NIGHT ♪

♪ ALL I EVER WANTED WAS LOVE ♪

♪ DARLING, DARLING, DARLING ♪

♪ DO YOU WANT TO FEEL THE GOOD SIDE... ♪

I'M SURPRISED YOU CALLED. I THOUGHT DAVE KIDNAPPED YOU.

TRUTH IS, I DON'T SEE MUCH OF HIM LATELY

HE'S SO DEVOTED TO HIS JOB,

WHICH IS GREAT 'CAUSE THAT GIVES ME PLENTY OF TIME

ON MY OWN WHICH I REALLY LIKE.

GOOD.

HMM.

BUT THE TIME I DO SPEND WITH HIM IS BRILLIANT.

'CAUSE DAVE'S REALLY MATURE AND PERCEPTIVE.

EXCUSE ME.

YOU KNOW, I'VE COME TO THE CONCLUSION

THAT INDEPENDENCE IS THE PILLAR IN ANY RELATIONSHIP.

'CAUSE RELATIONSHIPS ARE LIKE PLANTS.

THEY NEED AIR. THEY NEED BREATHING SPACE.

OTHERWISE THEY WILT.

SOUNDS LIKE YOU'VE GOT VERY CLEAR IDEAS.

YEAH. NEVER BEEN MORE FOCUSED IN MY WHOLE LIFE.

I SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOU, YOU KNOW.

I SAW HIM FIRST.

YEAH, I KNOW,

BUT IT WASN'T HOW I WANTED IT TO HAPPEN.

IT WAS JUST FATE OR SOMETHING.

YEAH, MR. FATE'S ALWAYS TO BLAME.

WELL, IF YOU SEE HIM, SEND HIM TO ME.

I'D REALLY LIKE TO FUCK HIM.

WELL, IT ALL SERVED FOR A GOOD PURPOSE.

AT LEAST YOU MANAGED TO LEAVE THAT REVOLTING VICTOR BEHIND.

YEAH.

OH, MY GOD.

HAVE YOU SEEN HIM ON THAT AWFUL PROGRAM ON WEDNESDAY?

YEAH. I'VE SEEN IT ONCE.

I ADMIT HE'S NOT SO BAD, BUT IT'S OBVIOUS

THAT'S AS FAR AS HE'S GOING TO GET WITH HIS CAREER.

DID YOU SEE THAT EPISODE

WHEN HE CAUGHT HIS DAD HIGH ON ECSTASY?

YEAH. AND THE ONE WHERE HIS DAD WAS ARRESTED

FOR DANCING NAKED ON STAGE AT GLASTONBURY.

YEAH, THAT WAS FUNNY, TOO.

HEY, THOUGHT YOU SAID YOU ONLY SAW IT ONCE.

WELL, TWICE.

YEAH? WELL, IT'S YOUR TURN.

YEAH.

Louise: DO YOU HAVE ANY CIGARETTES LEFT?

SOMEWHERE.

I CAN'T FIND ANY.

NEITHER CAN I, BABY.

HERE. THERE IS A LOOSE ONE.

IS THIS WHERE YOU WRITE YOURSELF MESSAGES

SO YOU DON'T FORGET THINGS?

GOOD IDEA.

NO!

LOUISE, GOD DAMN IT!

THIS IS A PERSONAL THING...

OF MINE.

SHIT, LOUISE.

LOU.

I'M SORRY. I DIDN'T MEAN TO SHOUT.

EVERY TIME I COME HERE,

I FEEL LIKE THERE IS SOMEBODY ELSE IN THE HOUSE.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU.

YOU'VE NEVER WANTED TO TELL ME.

BUT I CAN'T COMPETE WITH A GHOST.

I DON'T KNOW, YOUR HEART SEEMS TO BE STUCK SOMEWHERE.

I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN THIS.

NONE OF THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN.

I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE I AM SOMETIMES.

WELL, GO AND FIND OUT.

"BY NOW YOU SHOULD KNOW HOW FAR DOWN THE PATH

"OF DISENCHANTMENT YOU ARE.

"FROM THIS WORLD-WEARIED FLESH

"EYES LOOK YOUR LAST...

"ARMS, TAKE YOUR LAST EMBRACE...

"AND LIPS--O YOU, THE DOORS OF BREATH...

"SEAL WITH A RIGHTEOUS KISS...

A DATELESS BARGAIN TO ENGROSSING DEATH."

[REGGAE MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ BROKE YOUR TASK, KILL YOUR PAIN ♪

♪ RIDE ACROSS THE DAYS ON A ROSY TRAIN ♪

♪ TAKE A TRIP WITH ME

♪ OOH, BABY, TO A PARADISE... ♪

Louise on speaker: YES?

LOU, I NEED TO SPEAK TO YOU.

♪ LIGHT THROUGH THE DIRTY RAIN ♪

Louise: NO.

♪ WALKING THROUGH MY EYES... ♪

EXCUSE ME, I KNOW THIS IS A TERRIBLE THING

TO HAVE TO ASK YOU, BUT DO YOU THINK

YOU COULD TURN THAT DOWN A BIT?

THANKS.

LOU? I'VE COME A LONG WAY--

[CLICK]

LOU?

LOU?

Louise: A LONG WAY.

YOU JUST LIVE 2 BLOCKS AWAY.

NO, NO, NO.

WHAT I MEAN IS THAT YOU WERE RIGHT.

I THOUGHT THAT I WAS STUCK,

BUT I KNOW NOW THAT I'M NOT STUCK ANYMORE.

I'VE COME EVER SUCH A LONG WAY

WITHOUT EVEN REALIZING IT.

AND MOST OF IT'S THANKS TO YOU.

♪ BABY, CROSS THE LINE

♪ I WILL PAY YOUR FARE

♪ THEN I'LL STOP THE TIME IN YOUR FINAL STARE ♪

♪ THERE'S A DREAM THAT SHINES ♪

HANG ON.

THANKS.

[VOLUME INCREASES] ♪ KILL YOUR PAIN

♪ RIDE ACROSS THE DAYS ON A ROSY TRAIN ♪

[NEW SONG BEGINS]

♪ I FOUND MYSELF IN AN OPEN SQUARE ♪

♪ AT 2:00

♪ THE SQUARE WAS DIRTY

♪ FULL OF GARBAGE, PAPER, PLASTIC, TIN CANS ♪

♪ THERE WERE PEOPLE SLEEPING ON THE BENCHES ♪

♪ WITH BLANKETS MADE OF CARDBOARD ♪

♪ I WASN'T COMFORTABLE

♪ I TURNED INSTANTLY FROM WHAT I SAW ♪

♪ STINKING, FILTH, CONDEMNED ♪

♪ ONE OF THEM SMILES AT ME AND SAYS ♪

♪ HEY

♪ DON'T GO LOSING CARE TODAY... ♪

THANK YOU.

♪ HIDING YOUR FACE

♪ IN YOUR SOLITUDE

♪ I'VE ESCAPED

♪ FROM SOCIETY

♪ AND I'M TALKING OF KISSES, TOO ♪

Women: ♪ KEEPS US TRUE

♪ KEEPS US TRUE

♪ KEEPS US TRUE

♪ KEEPS US TRUE

♪ KEEPS US TRUE

♪ YOUR FACE

♪ IS MY LIGHT, HE SAYS

♪ AND THE DAY SHINES BETTER FOR THE VIEW ♪

Dave: HI, DARLING. IT'S ME. I'M STILL AT WORK.

WHEN WILL YOU BE BACK?

I'LL GET THERE AS SOON AS I CAN, I PROMISE.

LISTEN, DON'T BOTHER. YOU NEVER COME WHEN I NEED YOU.

WHAT?

I WANT TO SHARE SOMETHING REAL, TOO.

I WANT SOMEONE TO SHARE MY LIFE WITH AND YOU'RE NEVER HERE.

SYLVIA, YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND.

NO, I DO UNDERSTAND. I KNOW YOU THINK

YOU'VE GOT A DEBT TO SOCIETY AND I ADMIRE YOU FOR THAT.

BUT I ALSO HATE YOU FOR THAT.

I KNOW WHEN THE TIME COMES

YOU'RE GONNA CHOOSE SOME FAR-AWAY PLACE OVER ME,

AND I DON'T WANT TO BE HERE WHEN THAT HAPPENS.

SYLVIA?

TV announcer: EMMA FREUD.

SYLVIA?

Emma Freud: GOOD EVENING, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

AND WELCOME TO THE 19th BAFTA AWARDS

WHICH ARE GIVEN TO THE MOST OUTSTANDING FEATURES

IN BRITISH TELEVISION OVER THE PAST YEAR.

WITH THESE AWARDS, WE'RE NOT ONLY PLACING BOOKMARKS

ON THE MOST MEMORABLE PAGES OF A YEAR'S TELEVISION,

BUT WE'RE ALSO PAYING TRIBUTE TO THOSE FACES

WE MOST WANTED TO MEET AND HAVE AS COMPANY

WHEN WE SWITCH ON OUR TELEVISION SETS,

EITHER BECAUSE THEY MADE US LAUGH OR THEY MOVED US,

BECAUSE THEY MADE US REMEMBER

OR SIMPLY BECAUSE THEY MADE US FORGET.

[APPLAUSE]

TAXI!

HELLO?

FUCK!

AND THE WINNER...

AMANDA MOORE FOR LAST CHANCE.

EXCUSE ME, MISS. DO YOU HAVE AN INVITATION?

NO, I DON'T, BUT I REALLY NEED

TO SEE SOMEONE WHO'S IN THERE.

I'M SORRY, BUT I REALLY CAN'T LET YOU IN

WITHOUT AN INVITATION.

IT'S IMPORTANT.

WE MOVE ON NOW TO BEST COMEDY ACTOR

AND TO PRESENT THE AWARD, IT IS WITH GREAT PLEASURE

AND JUST A LITTLE BIT OF ENVY

THAT I GIVE YOU MISS CAPRICE BOURETT.

[APPLAUSE]

Caprice Boure THANK YOU.

AND THE NOMINEES FOR BEST COMEDY ACTOR ARE...

EDDIE BEUNOT FOR KENNEWAY...

[APPLAUSE]

PAUL JOHNSON FOR WILDED WINDSORS...

VICTOR BUKOWSKI FOR DAD'S SECOND YOUTH...

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST, BARRY...

HI. HI.

IS EVERYTHING ALL RIGHT?

YEAH. I'M SORRY TO DRAG YOU OUT LIKE THIS.

NO, NO, DON'T WORRY ABOUT THAT.

I WASN'T GOING TO WIN ANYWAY.

Caprice: AND THE WINNER IS...

I NEED TO TALK TO YOU.

AH, VICTOR BUKOWSKI FOR DAD'S SECOND YOUTH.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

YOU LOOK GREAT.

TELL YOU A SECRET.

WHAT?

IT'S HIRED.

LOUISE, LISTEN, I DON'T WANT TO LIVE IN THE PAST ANYMORE.

I KNOW WHERE I AM NOW.

BUT I HAVE TO EXPLAIN TO SYLVIA.

HUH?

UM, I'M HIS BEST FRIEND, FREDDY.

FREDDY SMITH.

AND I'M SO HAPPY

BECAUSE I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO HAVE A FAMOUS FRIEND.

NO, BUT SERIOUSLY...

I, UH...

I DID A STUPID THING.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING.

WELL, YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH SOMEBODY ELSE

AND THEN YOU FOUND OUT YOU WEREN'T.

I KNOW BECAUSE I DID THE SAME THING.

SEE, WE BOTH MADE THE SAME--

WE BOTH DID THE SAME STUPID THING,

AND IF I HADN'T DONE IT AT FIRST,

THEN MAYBE YOU WOULDN'T HAVE DONE IT.

WHAT?

SYLVIA, I HURT YOU.

I HAD AN AFFAIR AND--AND THEN I LIED TO YOU.

AND THEN I LEFT YOU FOR THAT PERSON

JUST LIKE THAT.

AND THEN THE SAME AS YOU.

I ONLY REALIZED MY MISTAKE WHEN I DIDN'T HAVE YOU ANYMORE.

VIC, I DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

BUT ISN'T IT TIME WE STOPPED MAKING MISTAKES?

YES, DARLING, IT IS.

LOUISE ISN'T A MISTAKE.

EVEN IF I COULD PRETEND THAT YOU NEVER LEFT ME...

I COULDN'T PRETEND THAT I DON'T LOVE HER.

YOU BETTER GO.

YEAH.

[SIGHS]

GOOD LUCK.

ALSO--THANKS.

I'D ALSO LIKE TO THANK--

UM, ER, VIC BUKOWSKI!

VIC BUKOWSKI!

[APPLAUSE]

MISS? MISS, WAIT A SECOND!

I THINK YOU'D BETTER TAKE THIS.

IT'S A BIT FRAYED, BUT IT'S BETTER THAN NOTHING.

BUT YOU?

NO WORRIES. I'VE GOT MY HAT.

THANKS.

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY

[SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME

[SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE]

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME...

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY TRIMARK HOME VIDEO

CAPTIONING PERFORMED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE, INC.

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY I CAN GO

♪ TAKE ME BY THE HAND

♪ SHOW ME THE WAY...