Original subtitles

Hey. Hey.

You still want to do this, right?

Marriage is the union of two people,

voluntarily entered into for life,

to the exclusion of all others.

Go get Gemma.

You love her, don't you? I do too.

Please don't go.

HORN BEEPS

Cab.

Shit! The cab.

Wait! Wait! Wait!

I'll drive you.

Oh, God.

Oh, God. Oh, God.

Where's my bag?

Don't panic.

I've got it!

Ten thirty in this hotel room

You and I locked in the gloom

Lost out of love once again

But I've got you here with me friend

Cos you're here in my arms

Here in my arms...

I've got it. You got it?

Let's go.

It's boarding.

I... We... Sorry, you say...

What were you going to say?

I was just...

Have a good trip.

OK.

Bye.

Some champagne, Sir? Thank you.

Madame? What are you doing?

She's blown all her air miles on us - she'd want us to enjoy ourselves.

What?

Gemma, what?

What have we done?

OK, it's working.

I'm calling now. Cool.

Wait, calling who? Ray.

What? To say sorry.

Sorry for what?

That we should never have got on the plane.

Nobody did anything wrong -

we don't need to feel shame or guilt about anything, Gem.

What are you saying?

Last night it was a spontaneous, beautiful,

necessary thing that we all had to do.

Yes. Yeah, but it was goodbye.

Is that really what last night was for you? Look, Gem,

I want to talk to her too, OK? Of course I do, but what can we say

that won't make this messy? How is this not messy?

We got on a plane, we said goodbye.

Let's not be cruel.

RINGING TONE

OK.

OK, let's talk to her - you're right.

Gem...

What do we say?

RINGING TONE CONTINUES

I've never felt like that before -

like I couldn't stop.

It was so... All right. Jesus, I don't need to hear the details.

Be my friend, Moi, please.

You're not gay, Wilson,

or bi or whatever.

I would know if you...

I love them, Moi.

They are your landlords.

They fucked you.

They went on honeymoon.

Yes, but... They've rejected your calls.

They haven't answered a single message or... They love each other.

They've been together for years.

I am the one who destroyed everything.

Stop blaming yourself.

Yes, you've done a very stupid thing, but they are fine.

They have flown first class to see one of nature's miracles

and you're taxiing them

to the airport and feeding their fucking cat. It's not...

Fuck them. It's not...

What were you hoping? That they'd take you on honeymoon?

Oh, God, you did. I didn't.

I don't know what I expected...

Mate, you are a shit-show.

I wasn't expecting them to take me,

or for them to stay. I...

Seriously, what were you hoping would happen?

Look,

all that's happened is you had a three-way.

You can tick that off the Cosmo Sex Quiz.

Merde. You are lucky.

You have been chosen.

You have been...

DOOR OPENS

..selected from thousands of applicants,

so take this opportunity to give yourself a pat on the back.

Now stop patting yourself on the back because this is just

the beginning - and not all of you will make it to the end.

Ramona Wilson.

Stand, please.

Let's imagine you have a flight at 9am.

You turn up for work at five minutes past nine.

Now, do you think you can stand on the runway

with your thumb in the air and have them stop?

No.

I don't think that.

You are the face of the company.

You are the front line.

Part of delivering a world-class service is delivering

yourself at your best.

Punctuality.

Three strikes and you're out.

Plenty more waiting to take your place.

That is strike one, Miss Wilson.

Ooh yeah, I feel it all over my body

Let me out

Let me go

It's a freak show.

These look really nice.

What are they?

Karjalanpiirakka.

This is the most kissed face of all time.

Based on a drowning victim pulled from the River Seine,

they've been helping train life-savers the world over -

and we have a genuine life-saver here to help train you.

All right, guys. Hey. Hi.

So, first thing you do is check for a level of response.

Hello, can you hear me?

He's unresponsive.

Have a look in the airway - it's clear.

Head back, tie your hands together

and do it at about one a second,

and you continue uninterrupted.

I do want to be married to you.

No, that sounded...

It's a minefield.

Fuck's sake, Gemma. I'm not saying you're a minefield. I'm saying...

We're on honeymoon and you're moping over someone else.

I'm not moping. Jesus.

I can't tell you how shitty that feels.

OK, yes, fine, I am.

I miss her like mad.

And fuck you -

you feel the same, so don't make this about just me.

I'm just saying...

You love her too

and I feel as jealous and confused

and sick as you do, so can we just be fucking kind to each other?

Do you regret it?

I feel ashamed.

Aren't you feeling...? No! Why would I feel ashamed?

Saying she loved us was the bravest thing I have ever seen,

and we fucked her and left.

We didn't answer her phone calls.

We didn't message her. We've ghosted her.

We're basically the worst sort of people.

No, it's not what happened, all right.

She watched us get married.

She knew we were leaving.

She upgraded our fucking seats, Gemma.

Oh, my God, Kieran, why do I have to explain to you that we've hurt her?

We are all grown-ups. We're all consenting adults.

I'm not talking about an unforgettable one-night stand.

What we did meant something,

and we fucked off on honeymoon

and we didn't even answer her phone call.

I think that would entirely destroy me.

We're not bad people.

We don't get to decide that.

Fuck!

You know I'm allergic?

It won't be for long.

You OK?

No.

Oh. Come in.

We are leaving in one minute.

I think I'm going to stay.

Kier... You go.

No, don't be silly.

I just really... I have to clear my head for a bit.

But the Northern Lights is your thing.

Kier... You go.

I just need to be alone for a bit, Gem.

Go.

PULSATING ELECTRONIC MUSIC PLAYS

HE SIGHS

Every one of these is awful! I have 25 chins!

THEY GIGGLE

CELLPHONE VIBRATES

"Kieran Lovell - new e-mail".

Unbelievable.

He's just...

He's trying to... He's covering his own arse.

I don't know.

At least you know where you stand.

CHATTER

THEY GASP, EXCLAIM

How was it?

I was trying not to wake you.

Did you see the Lights?

No.

MOI BARKS LIKE DOG, CAT MEOWS

FAINT CHATTER FROM TV

Er... Do this.

CAT MEOWS

Got it.

Have a good day at work, dear.

CELLPHONE RINGS, VIBRATES

She's not answering.

Why would you do this without consulting me?

You said we shouldn't ghost her.

I was trying to let her know that we still care... This is worse than nothing!

This is "It's not you, it's us." No, it's not!

I mean, it's clear and it's calm. I'm re-stating boundaries...

Who sends an e-mail to break up with someone? We're not breaking up with her, Gemma!

We're not in a relationship with her! Yes, we are. Of course we are.

We have been for months.

We've wrecked a really special thing.

And we've lost her from our lives forever.

OK.

Then let's not break up with her.

Let's be with her.

Kieran, no.

Obviously, no. People... People do that, Gemma.

People have relationships like that, all right?

They find a way to make it work... Are you wanting to risk, what we have, our marriage?

You're wanting to risk what we have on an experiment?!

Look, I know it's obviously a terrible idea, but I'm just saying we should... It's not possible!

All right, then what are we talking about, then?!

What do you want me to do? Stop trying to fix things and making them worse!

Fine!

I'll just leave everything shit.

Is that better?

What...? How do you think it would work? What...?

How would it practically...? What would it mean for our lives?

I don't know! I don't know, Gemma! OK? But I'm just saying that we should at least talk...

You want to be with her. Oh, come on!

Don't make me the man that's after two girlfriends, all right?

It's both of us... Kieran!

I-I don't love you any less

because of her and I know you don't love me any less.

Just say what you want! I want you to not hate me!

And I'm scared to death. I...

I'm scared I'm going to lose you either way.

I can't bear the thought of losing her or your heart breaking.

I know it's crazy. I know it's not possible, all right?

But one of us has to say it, because... Yes.

I want to be with her.

I want us to be with her.

You do too.

They're forecasting rain tonight, but we'll just wrap up warm.

I don't care about the Lights.

I want you to see it. We're here to see it!

Gemma, please, can we just talk...? Kieran, just stop!

Just stop!

Let's just try and have a honeymoon.

Like so.

OK, turn around for me.

There.

Not bad.

Yes! We did it! You look great!

No excursion tonight, sorry.

No visibility. The rain is...

Oh. No, no! This is bullshit.

Gem, it's... It's fine.

We can get a bottle of wine instead, try to enjoy ourselves.

We're only here to see the Northern fucking Lights.

It's very disappointing. I'm sorry.

It's fine.

Gemma!

Look, why are you so hellbent on me see...? Gemma!

Sorry.

Moi? How was your day?

That fleabag's a nightmare.

It crapped on the rug, vommed on the bed!

I had to take it to the vet - you owe me 65 quid, by the way.

And...look!

I'm covered!

I've had to wash the sheets, the rug, the pillow.

There's hair on everything.

I'm so sorry. I'll help... It's just so typical, Wilson!

You just don't give a shit about me.

That's not true. I'm invisible.

Moi, I'm... I've been right in front of you the whole time,

waving my arms about - "Hello! I'm here!"

And you just...

You don't see me.

SIREN BLARES IN DISTANCE

Let me help. I've got it!

Don't be a martyr.

Here? MOI EXHALES

MOI SHUDDERS

MOI GIGGLES

THEY GIGGLE

THEY LAUGH

Slow down. Slow down.

THEY MOAN

RAY MOANS

Slow...slow down.

Stop.

RAY MOANS

Stop!

What do you want, then?!

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Get the fuck off me!

I'm sorry! I don't know what that was! I'm just... I'm a mess.

Take all your fucking...

Take all this shit and get the fuck out of my life!

Get out!

MOI CRIES

Is this the worst honeymoon you've ever been on?

It's not funny.

We knew we might not see it.

We've got two more chances. The clouds will lift tomorrow... Hey!

It's got to. How amazing was it last night?

Wasn't it the most incredible experience of your life? Sorry, we're just...

You saw it?

No.

Maybe. A little... A little bit. It was faint.

Are you kidding? It was a full-sky miracle.

Can... Can you leave us alone for a moment, please?

What was it like?

Was it faint or...? They seemed to think...

It was amazing.

It was... I-I don't know how to describe it, Kier.

I-I've never seen anything like it.

It was like magic.

It was what he said. It was a miracle.

I'm so sorry.

You should've told me.

You thought I'd be upset with you because I wasn't there to... Well...

Yeah.

You being happy makes me happy.

I don't want you to hide things from me or stop yourself from being happy

because you think your happiness could ever cause me pain.

You being happy makes me happy too.

This is the worst honeymoon I've ever been on.

SHE LAUGHS

You idiot!

It's so bad!

The worst! It's so bad!

You are... Why did you drag me here?

Why did you...? THEY LAUGH

Because you're a crazy woman!

Get away from me!

SHOUTING GROWS FAINT

THEY PANT

THEY MOAN

Weather's forecast to be good tomorrow.

Maybe we'll be lucky.

Or... We could go home.

THEY LAUGH

It's almost 8:00. They'll fine you if they catch you here.

Here.

Looks like you could use this.

Thank you.

That's four quid.

Oh.

Right.

Keep the change.

Cheers, love.

Here you go.

Thank you. You're welcome.

How do I look?

Classy.

I know I haven't being giving this my full focus.

But I do want to be here.

Frankly, this is all I have left.

I know my appearance today is not ideal,

but I was on time, and... CELLPHONE RINGS

Oh!

And if... If you knew what it took to...

RINGING CONTINUES

Sorry.

You want to take that?

No.

Sorry.

Life happens to us all.

The training is strict.

It has to be.

But we're a family, Ramona.

We're a team. OK?

I'll talk to HR about your housing issue.

There might be a room in the crew digs you can have short term.

Thank you.

What's his name?

Excuse me?

Oh. David Bowie.

He's named after...

..David Bowie.

You can leave him with Ida at Reception.

It'll make her day.

Ray? Hello? Ray!

Shit.

Hi.

Thank you.

I can't help you.

We just need to find her. She's not here.

Did she tell you where she might be, or...? You're sick.

Do you know that?

You're disgusting.

Leave her alone.

Let's go from the top.

Smiles!

Ladies and gentlemen, two emergency exits can be found

at the rear of the plane, to the le...

Oh, dear God, no! Stop. Stop. Stop.

Where is my Sellotape?

Oh, no!

That'll learn you.

I don't want to see splayed digits or wonky thumbs.

PEOPLE CHUCKLE

I expect more from you, Miss Olympics.

Right, let's go from the start again.

Ladies and gentlemen...

PLANE ENGINE ROARS

Goodnight. Goodnight! Bye.

KIERAN: Ray? SHE GASPS

What are you doing here?

We came back early. We had to see you.

And we're sorry about... What do you want? We love you.

We love you too.

And we should have said it earlier and we're sorry that we didn't, because we do.

I love you. I love you.

He loves you. We love you.

Er...

It took us a while to work out how we feel, but... You sent an e-mail.

You made it pretty clear what the situation was.

Yeah, I know. That was dumb.

I'm an idiot. I tried to call... Don't do this!

Did you really think I'll just be waiting for you to figure out

what you want? And then?

Then what?

We... We set up some kind of commune?!

All right. Ray, just... Just tell us what can we do to show you...

You can listen to me.

I shouldn't have told you I had feelings.

You broke my heart!

We know we... We fucked up.

We're sorry. We...

We love you.

We'll do whatever it takes.

I want you to leave.

Ray! Ray... Ray, please don't do this!

RAY PANTS Ray!

Ray, please.

ENGINE STARTS

SHE HONKS HORN

Wait!

He had an infection.

He's got a week left of antibiotics. You should keep him.

He doesn't like the drops, so I've been putting them in his wet food.

Please.

He doesn't like us anyway.

I can't have pets where I'm staying.

Ray!

SHE EXHALES

Ladies and gentlemen, mesdames et messieurs,

please make sure your seat belts are secured,

your tray tables are folded away, your belongings are safely stowed

and all electronic devices are in Flight Safety Mode

as we begin our final descent.

We would like to take this moment to thank you for flying with us.

Whether you are visiting or returning home, bienvenue

and welcome to London.

That's the fucking irony -

make something worth something and it gets sold from under you.

We're doing what we can to fight it, but...

We will see.

I should...

I haven't slept for 20 hours.

Here, I can... Oh, you don't have to.

Thanks.

Oh, er...

I think I still have my keys.

Keep them. Here.

You should keep them. They're yours.

This place is your...

I'm really sorry about the cafe. Thank you.

GEMMA SIGHS, KNOCK ON DOOR

When you said I should keep the keys, did you mean...?

Are you saying...?

What are you saying?

OK.

I'm so tired.

This is such a bad idea.

It rains love when I'm with you

It rains love when I'm with you

You're my sun when the clouds roll through

It rains love when I'm with you

I may not be the richest man...

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