Original subtitles

- Previously, on "below deck"...

- Michael blackton, he and his college pals, glen and reed,

reliving their wild party days.

- Let's go!

[ shouting ]

- and they want us to speak to them in pirate lingo.

- I just wanna see pirates!

- Totally.

- Simone, I'm gonna have you on lates,

so it's gonna be more service than normal.

- Ooh, where did they go? - You have to go find out.

Simone is a yachtie with no experience.

- I understand you'll be leaving us today.

- Yeah. - Yachting's not for quitters.

[bleep]

- get home safe, and all the best.

- All right.

- Thank you for everything, all right?

- With abbi gone, it's gonna make things

a hundred times worse. - It's just us for this charter,

so we're gonna have to pull through.

- [bleep] oh, goddamn it.

- We're probably gonna have to get a doctor out here.

- My knee is just getting worse and worse and worse.

- No!

- Where would you like your gazebos?

And if you go shade here, and then it's gonna be

all shade all the way through there.

I wish I did trust kate,

but she's checked out of the stewardessing side of things.

- Welcome to my life.

- I have a new deckhand coming.

- Do you have a copy of a cv that I can have a look at?

- Oh, you already know it.

- Arr! - Arr!

[ laughing ] - woo!

- I have a new deckhand coming for you today.

- Okay.

- With us so close to being down two hands...

- Two men, yeah.

- I wanna go ahead and get her on board as quickly as possible.

- Do you have a copy of a cv that I can have a look at?

- Oh, you already know it.

It's rhylee.

We need the help.

I chose to hire rhylee back because I know

she's a hard worker.

So my choice, my call... I'm bringing her back.

I know she had some issues with ross and chandler...

- You speak to me condescendingly one more time,

I'm taking it to the ----ing captain.

- Just let me know when you need help.

- I said I got it five ----ing times.

- Look, I think chandler was way over the top with her,

and I think ross didn't set the boundaries.

Maybe this'll be like

"goldilocks and the three bears,"

and you'll be just right.

- I'm not happy at all about this.

Rhylee is a very emotional person.

She's very reactive.

Is she gonna add more value than somebody else

with a better attitude could have added?

No, she's not gonna.

- I think she just needs to be channeled properly.

- Thanks for filling me in, cap.

- We'll be back to full speed soon.

- Oh, what cocktails are you making this morning?

- The pirate's blood.

The pirate day... How basic of you.

- Arr! - Arr!

- Arr... You got the best one, all right.

- Thank you so much. - You're welcome.

Get an eye patch, get a parrot, you get a sword, you get a hat.

- Yarr! - Arr!

- Doesn't that get old after childhood?

You look so darn cute in that hat.

Mommy said I could wear my pirate hat to school today?

- How are you?

Ah! - Aw.

- Deck check complete, all secure, cap.

- Copy that, thank you.

- Y'all ready for our main voyage?

- Arr! - Yes! Arr!

- Tanner, tanner, ash.

Come down to the crew mess for a minute, please, bud.

- Copy that. - To getting booty!

[ cheering ]

- that's ----ing good!

Cap's decided to bring the new deckhand in

once we drop the hook.

- Yee-hee! All right.

- And it's somebody that worked with...

With me last season, so yeah, rhylee's gonna come in.

She likes to stay informed,

so make her feel a part of the team.

- Yeah, well, she's part of the team now, bro, so of course.

- [bleep] yeah, get the ball rolling.

- Right.

- Someone that you're interested in?

- Yeah, that's a hard no, not at all.

- Sorry, bud.

- Someone's there's a lot of history with

from last season. - Like kate.

[ laughs ]

- no, dickhead.

- Those painkillers got your, like, juices flowing, bro.

- Yeah. - He's not himself.

- They want more jell-o shots out there.

- Kate, kate, lee. - Go ahead.

- Do you have a minute for me? - Ahoy, captain.

- I just wanted to let you know that we have

a new crewmember coming on board.

You do know her.

It's rhylee.

- How perfect. - I think so.

- It's pirate day, and rhylee's coming back.

Rhylee and I got off to a rough start in tahiti.

- I'm gonna do whatever the [bleep] I'm gonna do.

I can say whatever the [bleep] I wanna say.

- Oh, just stop.

- I'm good, I don't give a [bleep].

- But by the end of the season, I loved her.

- I gotta clean my room. - Yes.

- Surprisingly not bad. Where's kate?

- I don't know.

- Do you need your glasses?

- And is simone here or not? - She's not up yet, no.

She was up later.

- Can you just ask for the deckhands?

- Deck crew, is anyone available to help for breakfast service?

- Yeah, affirmative, courtney, I can help you.

- Courtney, I can come.

- Kate, kevin asked for deck crew also.

- What the [bleep].

- Kate understands food being served

through a burger king window.

She doesn't realize how much work goes into this.

And so I've almost had to take over that role of service.

Kate, kate, service, please.

- Oh, this is a good one, you guys.

How long is that gonna sous vide for?

- Until the guests are ready, so...

- Oh, great. - Let's get the guests ready.

- I don't know, what's the time now?

- Jesus, get it together.

I shouldn't have to do this,

because I should just be worrying about the food.

So the well-dones are for michael and kelly.

Your two, whoever you want;

make sure you've got your pirate accent going.

- Whoever I want? - Whoever you want.

- Now we have deck hands on for breakfast service?

- I love you all. Arr.

- That's a new one. Such a control freak.

[ guests chattering ]

- be a generous tipper. - You just tip him a gold coin?

- Ooh, that is hot. - Like, on fire.

- What would you like me to do?

- Can you go down to the guest quarters,

and also I need you to wear some pirate gear.

- Oh, my god, I love it. Does this look cute?

- It looks cute. Are we done with breakfast?

- Well, I started my morning right.

- Okay, captain, standing by anchor, ready to drop.

- And drop. Gimme two shots, please.

Check the stay. - Yeah, that's good.

- Lock it in. - Good job, bro.

- Oh, that's pretty, look at that.

- All right, cap, that's tender away.

- Teh, teh, lee...

Why don't you go ahead and pick our new deckie up.

- Ashton, have you got any pirate flair going on?

- I've got a big sword.

- I think someone wants to go treasure-hunting.

- Yes. - Let's go in there.

- I'm gonna need to borrow this later,

when I send the two girls off the front.

- Do it.

Everything happening with me and shaely is just very playful.

I'll often enjoy the game more

than actually getting something out of it.

- Yep.

- You better watch out.

- [bleep].

All right, I'll see you later. - Yeah, see you later.

- All right, see you later.

- Do you wanna touch my dagger?

- Hello, simone, do you need help?

- Hello. No, I'll be okay.

- I'll hold the door open for you.

So you're south african and I'm north american.

- Oh, okay. - Opposites attract, right?

Do you still have myspace, I'll add you.

Is there a garter on your leg?

- Yeah. - Do you want that off.

[ laughs ]

I think I like south africans now.

- Roger that.

- Hi! - How you doing?

- What's going on?

- Hi, rhylee. - Hey, kate.

- Guess what? You're my roommate.

- Oh, sweet, nice.

- Tanner. - Tanner, nice to meet you...

Rhylee. - Brian.

- Hello, brian, I'm rhylee, nice to meet you.

- Nice to meet you.

- Go do your thing, I'll bring it up for you...

- Okay, thank you. - I'll leave it, uh...

I'll just bring it downstairs.

- I mean, I'm capable to bring it up myself

but I'm gonna go talk to cap first, just so you know.

- For sure.

- Since tahiti, I have done my alaskan summer fishing charter.

With this season, my goal is to learn

the lay of the land on the yacht a little bit more,

because I don't like doing a job half-assed.

So if I don't understand the ins and outs...

- Hello, rhyles.

- Let me get a hug... How are you doing?

- I'm doing good. - This is nice out here.

- Thanks for coming out on short notice.

- Of course.

- I just wanted to go over a couple of things

before we get started. Coming in as third deckie.

- Okay. - Ash is your bosun.

- Okay. - Having rhylee answer the call

really helps us out of a tight spot.

We will respect the rank.

Do your job, everything'll be fine.

- Okay.

- But I hope she doesn't let her dump truck mouth

overload her wheelbarrow ass.

Ashton, ashton, lee... To the bridge, please.

- Those my uniforms? - Mm-hmm.

- There's your uniforms.

Ash.

- Pleasantly surprised, are you?

- Yeah, of course.

Oh, boy, I'm definitely not ready for this.

- Coming up... - Simone, simone.

We are going shark-diving. - Shark-diving?

- I'm gonna take you with me. Yep.

- This is... It's too much. Um...

- I'll be the shark, you be the diver.

- Oh, omg.

- Ash. - How are you, rhy?

- Good, how are you? - Good to see you again.

- You, too.

- I've already explained to rhylee

exactly how things are gonna go.

Just treat her like one of the guys,

and we'll get through the season.

- I'm having, like, massive flashbacks

of everything we had to go through with her last year.

Let's just hold off until he's locked the chain off.

- I think he said that once he says "shackles..."

- rhylee, every time I speak to you,

you tell me what you think chandler said.

- Calm down.

- Last year I could kind of deal with it at arm's length,

but now I'm bosun, and now it's my problem.

I'm not looking forward to this.

- Anything else?

- I'll just jump into uniform, I guess, and then...

- Yeah. - Welcome aboard, kiddo.

- Thank you. It makes me a little nervous,

going into this season with ashton in a leadership role.

But it's not gonna deter me from doing my job and being me.

I gotta learn this boat now.

- I know, it's confusing.

- Hey, hey! - Backflip?

[ shouting, cheering ]

- nice, liquid yacht wear.

- How you feeling?

- Painkillers are kicking in, so I feel better now.

- I'm not a person that likes to relax.

I feel guilty when I can see people running around

and working hard, and I'm not working hard with them.

It sucks, I don't like it when things like this happen.

- How are you?

- Good.

- But I mean, I can't, like, if you...

They need help on deck, you know what I mean?

- Well, they have rhylee now.

- Here's rhylee. - You're brian, right?

Accent is? - South african.

- How's it been going? Why am I here?

- Thanks, abbi. - Yeah.

- I'm happy to be here. It's hot here.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Everything about brian screams sexy to me,

and I'm gonna look forward to seeing

a lot more of him this season.

- Tanner, oi, oi.

- What about you, tanner, what's your background?

- New york, what about you?

- I fish in alaska.

- Brilliant, we could have used you last charter.

- Caw-caw, caw-caw. - Omg.

- I stole captain lee's bird. This is captain mini-lee.

Chef, me and simone are going to south africa...

- Really?

- And we're gonna go shark-diving.

- I don't think I mentioned that.

- I love you.

- Michael hasn't been acting too appropriate to simone.

I'm feeling awkward, and I'm standing,

you know, six feet away.

- Thank you.

- We're gonna break some rules, simone.

- Okay. - Hi, again.

- Hi.

- All right, you just ----ed-up my entire vibe.

- Pretty ----ing drunk.

- They just get a bit too comfortable.

- They get way too comfortable.

- Ah. - So, are you happy to be back?

- I am.

- So what I'd like to do is start fresh.

I wanna give you a fair chance, and I wanna see you grow.

- Last season I was left out of a lot of deck meetings,

a lot of the heavy lifting.

When I'm sitting up here ----ing cleaning, okay,

it's menial, it feels like I'm ----ing underneath

every ----ing person.

And that's why I'm like I don't give a [bleep]

if you wanna let me go.

I just hope that ashton makes me feel a part of the team.

- I want there to be an open line of communication

if there's something that you're not happy about.

- You know I don't have a problem, you know,

expressing an issue, you know?

- You'll get into it quickly, and I'll do a quick

walk-around with you... - Okay.

- And show you where everything is.

- Could I have iced coffee, or is that too difficult?

- No, we can make iced coffee as well.

- Are you sure? - Yeah.

- Okay.

- I followed you, and you didn't follow me back.

- Why? - Court?

- Yeah?

- With an iced coffee, do I just make the espresso

and then put it in the blender with the coff...

- No, just over ice.

- Just ice.

- Yeah, but make sure it's cooled down first.

- She's funny.

- Want some help?

- I'll do 'em. - Okay.

- What?

You already liked it!

- Do you remember who these are for, hon?

- Yes.

- Will you tell me, so I can look at their preferences?

Simone is training herself in service this charter.

- And I am training myself in patience.

Pardon me.

- The juice is down...

Oh, there's actually one in there.

- Right there. - Okay, perfect.

Um... Omg.

- [ sighs ]

- arr! - Arr!

- Here you go. - Thank you.

- You're welcome.

- That's the dress you were wearing

when I kissed you, isn't it? - Yeah.

- Ooh.

Don't forget that.

- Wing stations. - Okay.

- Do you remember them from last year?

- Yeah.

- So this is where we operate the davits from.

We got a tow line over there... Chamois.

- Ow, ow my feet burn, pick me up, pick me up...

Pick me up, pick me up. - Oh, oh, oh, oh!

- Okay. - Oh... Who are you?

- Hi, I'm rhylee. - This is rhylee.

This is michael... He's our primary.

- Can I transfer to you? - Mike, I probably could do it.

- I love redheads. - Okay, let's do it this way.

- We're taking you over here, though

- you can take me wherever you want.

Do you wanna go see the master suite?

- Here.

- Did you really just carry me like that?

- I think I did.

- Where's she been all week? - She's our new deckhand.

- Okay.

- ♪ all the beautiful colors in the world ♪

maybe you'd like to take a wee instagram photo first.

Normally kate does it, but she's not here right now.

- Megan... Get outta here.

- Get one of me smiling in my pirate hat?

- No. - What's going on?

- Get a close-up. - Yeah.

- At an angle.

- Okay, which one is for shaela?

- This one here. - Shaely?

- With all the heat and humidity here...

It really sweetens up really lovely,

and so this salad here is just all fresh ingredients.

It's quick and simple, but...

And that's what I love about it, you know?

- I can't wait to serve it to them,

they're gonna appreciate it so much.

- Thanks, kate. - Mm-hmm.

All right, grab shaely's.

- Do you want me to do shaely?

- I don't know, you wanna go out there?

- I just like making your job easier.

- Same. - Yeah?

- Oh! - Lunch, lunch, lunch!

- Hey, chef.

- Shaely, I've just put the dressing on the side.

- Oh, where's mine?

- Thanks, guys.

- Ah! - Oh!

- Oh! - I love titties!

- ----Ing wasted. - That was so cold.

That was so ----ed up of you. - [ gasps ]

- [bleep]

- well, lunch just deteriorated real fast.

- He deserved every second of that.

- So what's for dinner tonight? - They're having big steaks.

I might just give them all bandanas

and make a country-western theme party.

I'll give you the black one.

- Okay.

- Cool. Thank you.

- That was so cold I can't even sit in my chair, it's so cold.

- Hello.

Simone, simone.

We are going shark-diving. I'm gonna take you with me.

- Shark-diving? - Shark-diving?

- Yep. - Um...

- I'll be the shark, you be the diver.

- Oh, omg.

- Okay, sure.

- Um, I'm getting weird vibes from the primary.

It's just, yeah, past the point of...

- No return. - ...Appropriateness.

- Walking around like this the whole ----ing trip.

- Will you go down to laundry with courtney...

- Okay.

- And I'll call you when I need you.

[ sighs ] thank you.

- I'm not having simone go out there.

The primary is drunk and creepy.

The unfortunate thing is that this happens

sometimes in yachting.

Guests think they can do whatever they want,

but that doesn't make it okay.

So as simone's boss,

it's my job to remove her from the situation.

- It's our last day.

Let's get as ----ed up and disrespectful as we can.

- Coming up...

- I'm not gonna come and knock on your cabin door.

[ laughs ]

- jeez, stop being naughty.

[ whistling ]

- looks like cough syrup.

- To being lit.

- I think there's some pirates coming.

- Sunset cruise.

- Sunset cruise. I'm commando today.

- I'm always commando.

- Ready for the sunset cruise?

- Arr. - All right.

- Sounds good.

- Have fun. - Adios!

- All clear, boss man.

- Hey, you wanna talk over the menu?

- Uh, we're gonna do the steak on a plate, with mashed potato.

- Well, that's good, because I'm doing,

like, a country-western type of theme.

Tonight we're doing a steakhouse meal...

Simple, classic, they're gonna love it.

I've traveled all over the world,

and I lived in denver, colorado for a while

as a line cook, and got to experience

a bit of american cuisine.

You know, there's gonna be lots of different sh--.

It's all about that meat, meat, meat, meat,

and hopefully it'll be yum, yum, yum.

I'd better get my butt moving. Eight o'clock should be fine.

- Okay.

- All right, sit back and enjoy the view.

Of the sun.

- Thanks for clarifying.

- Jeez, stop being naughty.

I haven't had much luck with the ladies this season yet.

I haven't been planting my seeds in the right places.

- Trying to get it in, ash? - Why lie, abbi?

So it's extremely hard not to be tempted by a woman

that is constantly hitting on you.

- Tomorrow morning, you knock, I'll wake.

- I'm not gonna come and knock on your cabin door.

I cannot do that.

But if I were to hook up with a charter guest, I'd be fired.

So this ----ing sucks.

- I'm trying.

- Okay, come on.

- Hi. - Are you done in there?

- Yeah. I even folded up my towel.

- You don't have... Just saying if...

If I see it I'm probably gonna hang it.

- Holy [bleep]. - Hello.

- Hey. - Hi.

- Thank you for the nice little cruise.

- You're welcome. - Thank you.

- Cheers.

- Ooh... No, I need brian, not you.

Sorry, honey.

- Just country it up. - All right.

- We're in texas. - Brian is back on deck.

- Yeah, buddy!

- This is very county fair.

- So we're heading on time for 10 minutes?

- Yeah.

And I want you to just get over your jet lag.

- Yeah.

- I want us to be happy, I want us to be hydrated,

I want us to be in good spirits. - Okay.

- Thanks, rhy. Nice to have you back.

- Thank you.

- Hi. - So hungry.

- You and your zingers.

- How you feeling, simone?

- Pissing you off, huh? - Mm-hmm.

- One of the charter guests? - A primary.

- What?

- I think she has a little crush on me.

We're gonna see what happens tomorrow night.

Cougar.

- Nothing wrong with a little cougar-hunting.

- You're gonna try to kill her with a poison dart?

- No, I'm just...

Jeez, it was a joke, rhylee.

Welcome to valor, sh--.

- [ wolf whistle ]

simone, simone.

Where's your garter you had on, or is it gone?

- Oh, that's one secret.

- You didn't leave it in my room, did you?

- Captain lee!

- Sexy, look at that shirt! - Looking very dapper.

- What's up, young man? - How are you?

- Young man. - Good to see you.

There's my boots.

- Oh, we chugged beer out of 'em earlier.

- How'd it taste? - L-l-l-lit.

- You are the epitome of lit.

- The captain knows how to get lit.

- What I wanna do is all the side plates here,

and all the main plates over here,

individually putting on brussels sprouts is very time-consuming.

- Ready for some big old steaks?

So have the girls serve them?

- What? - Yeah, that should work.

- It's very sister-wife.

It's a bit of a blow to my ego

that kevin is acting like

it's only him that gets to decide how the meals are served.

I'm the head of service, and he's made me into a sidepiece.

Are we being serious?

- Yeah, it's a lot easier. - Uh-huh.

- Ash, ash, kev, can you come to the galley,

please, have you got a sec? - Oh, good.

- This is nice, having all the active crewmembers

in the galley at the same time. I like this.

- Thanks, guys.

- I'll take captain and the primary.

- Beautiful, guys, really good work.

- I can't do this. I can't live like this.

- You're doing it again, sir. - Okay, let's go.

- On the plate, first we've got australian steak, grass-fed,

mashed potato beneath it, and then green beans,

brussels sprouts; the third one is roasted carrots...

Enjoy. - Wow.

- Thanks, chef. - Do you want some green beans?

- Yes, please.

- I know that kevin has control issues,

but the least he can do is not overstep his boundaries.

This is bullsh--. He knows it, I know it.

- This is a large piece of meat. - I heard that earlier.

- Simmer down, simmer down.

- Thanks so much, guys. I'll buy you a beer tomorrow.

- Everything about yesterday was amazing, today is amazing...

Above and beyond.

- To living life on a small dinghy.

- Yes, cheers! - Salut.

- Salut.

- Oh, thank [bleep] that's over.

- How is everyone doing?

- Thank you.

- And with that this evening, I am gonna bid you guys adieu.

- You're getting good yelp reviews.

- You all right? - Not really.

- You had a rough evening?

- All day has been rough, and I admit

I was ----ing pissed off during dinner at you.

Took my job without consulting me...

- Yeah.

- And made me and the girls literally just the side bitches.

You made me feel like sh--.

Coming up...

- Boy, that thing has blown up. Jesus christ.

If his leg doesn't get better, I'll have to replace him.

- I was ----ing pissed off during dinner at you.

Took my job without consulting me...

- Yeah.

- And made me and the girls literally just the side bitches.

I felt like sh--, you know?

- In my head, I was just like, if it's all gonna

go out together at once, and then we would have...

- I understand the concept. - Yeah, yeah, yeah.

- We just have never done it that way before.

- Yeah. I've never served a steak dinner

with these three sides and this. Everything is always different.

And because you don't take charge,

that makes me take charge.

And if you want me to do your job, then [bleep] off.

- Yeah, it turned out great.

I just didn't like feeling like the side bitch.

So when we take time to plan it together

and then at the last minute you pull the rug out from under me,

it's just, it... - Yeah.

- I've been doing my best to make kevin's job

as easy as possible for him.

But if he continues to disrespect my position,

his job can be much more difficult.

All right, I'll see you in the morning.

Thank you. Have a good night.

- I'll see you in the morning, thank you.

Oh, for [bleep]'s sake.

- Simone, simone... When are we going shark-diving?

- Mm, I don't feel like shark-diving.

- Yeah.

- Um, yeah, I don't agree with the concept of shark-diving.

- Oh.

- Could this day just end, and these people just go?

Ugh. It's just... It's too much.

- I'm feeling kinda sweet tonight.

- Let's go up. [ chattering, laughing ]

- I frigging love simone.

- She's, like, really nice, sweet, makes drinks.

- Yeah, but you can't. - He's so inappropriate.

- I knew he was gonna be like that, though, like, from...

- How do you know? - From his photo, you can tell.

- No.

- No?

- What happened yesterday?

- What happened yesterday?

- Yesterday...

- It's going good? - Mm-hmm.

- This is the coolest spot we've been to.

- It is.

- It sucks when you're stranded on the boat...

- I know. - And you just wanna go explore.

- What happened yesterday?

- Oh, man.

Mm-hmm. - Wait.

Maybe I should just think about it and I'll feel...

I already feel so much better now, ooh.

- Oh, my goodness. - Yep.

- Um ...

- He's so weird.

I bet he does that to, like, every waitress

and everyone. - What you guys doing?

- I'm gonna go sleep in a minute.

Do you wanna go try that bathtub in the bathroom?

- Oh sh--.

- I like talking to myself.

- Why don't you start pulling for breakfast, simone?

- Okay, yeah. - Courtney, go to bed.

- Okay. Toodle-doo. - All right.

- I get two steps... Two steps, two steps.

- Good night, guys. - Good night!

- Good night.

- All right, I'm gonna go to bed.

- Do you need help? - No, thank you.

Thanks for the offer, though. - Good night.

- Sleep well. - Good night.

- Arrivederci, katey boo-boo.

[ sighs ]

- I need to go to bed.

[ yawning ]

- absolutely.

- Is it? I'm a big morning sex guy.

[ sighs ]

[ laughs ] - the sighs of the drop-off day.

- When your staring at the wilted, dying flowers,

and you're like, "I get it."

- all right, which one are you starting on?

- Uh, do blue.

- Would be my first slide experience, really.

- It takes a while. - Yeah.

- And it's heavy as [bleep]. - Yeah.

The most appealing thing to me about working on

these mega-yachts is you really get to travel the world.

I've always wanted to visit thailand.

It's certainly breathtaking, and I'm happy to be here.

- Jet-lagged at all?

- I'm only moody when I'm affected by, like,

my surroundings, in case you haven't been warned.

- [bleep] you, asshole!

- I do have a trucker's mouth.

- Good to know.

- God, don't let him come in here.

Kate, kate, lee... Primary's up.

- Morning.

- Good, how are you?

- All crew, all crew, hide your wives, the primary's up.

- My mom, she has a macaw.

She loves that bird more than me.

She took me out of the will.

- Good morning, would you like coffee, or...

- He's having a bloody mary.

- Morning. - Maybe a stella?

- Sure.

- Do you want me to go down there so I can hook it?

- Oh, that'd be sweet.

- All good?

- You're a hell of a hooker. Nice job.

[ sighs ]

- here we go, breakfast is starting.

- What's that I smell? Freshly baked muffins.

- Yeah!

Hi, good morning, courtney.

- Come in.

[ grunts ]

brian's leg, it's actually worse.

[ hissing in pain ]

there's a chance that I might lose brian.

- Ah sh--.

- Coming up...

- The person who acts out

is the person that looks like the idiot.

Unfortunately, that's you.

You ----ing belong on a fishing boat in alaska.

- Dude...

- [bleep] man.

- My leg is excruciating.

My calf is double the size.

- Stay in bed.

Feel better, bro.

- I need to see the doctor, asap.

- Good morning. - Morning, kate.

- How's brian?

- Not good, can't even walk.

- We can't lose him. - Yeah.

- Poor guy.

- How you doing, chef? - Good morning, how are you?

- I'm wonderful, how hard would it be for some chicken stir-fry?

- Chicken stir-fry?

- Yeah, chicken, peppers, onions, some broccoli.

Is that okay with you, slick? - Okay.

[bleep] off. Like, just go [bleep] yourself.

- I appreciate it, chef.

- Morning, cap. - Morning.

- So brian's worse today.

- Worse? - Yeah.

His calf is, like, swollen,

and he can't walk on it properly.

- We can get a doctor back down to the dock

if it's getting worse. - Yeah.

- Jesus christ, there's no way he's gonna

be able to finish out the charter.

If his leg doesn't get better, I'll have to replace him.

There's nothing personal,

but how can you get by with a one-legged deckhand?

This ain't ----ing captain hook.

- So then it'll be myself, rhylee,

and tanner on deck for docking.

- Is what it is.

- Bubba getting lit already, boy.

- Sit on it.

- All right, that's the slide done.

- I'm good with a slide now. - Oh, yeah?

- I hope his face burns off.

- I'll say breakfast stir-fry.

- Chop, chop, chop.

- Pack your sh--, get off the boat.

- Ooh, yes.

- I'm sad, I don't wanna go home.

- Okay, I can show you the anchor.

- Classic. - This is your devil's claw.

- Okay. - So you loosen that.

So what you wanna do now is loosen your clamp.

Abbi got along with the crew so well,

but she was distracted very easily.

I would much rather have rhylee on deck,

working hard and wanting to learn,

and adding value to the team.

- Captain, captain, rhylee, standing by on anchor.

- Start pulling.

- That's good, hold it in further.

Gotta press it hard.

- All right, anchor's in the pocket.

- We're outta here.

- Let's go down and get into our whites.

[ grunting ]

- you need help packing? Because I'm not gonna help.

- No, no. - You got it?

- All right, captain, deck crew's standing by.

- Copy that, we're on the final approach.

- You're 300 feet to the channel marker stern.

- [bleep] yeah, rhylee.

- Okay. - All right, let's lock it in.

Good job, everybody. - Rhylee's on her a game!

- On my age game.

[bleep]

- twelve o'clock on the button... Boom!

- Let's get outta here. - A bit heavy.

- Attention all crew, I need you on aft deck in five.

- I hope this is brief and to the point.

- Mm-hmm.

- Vamos. - Bye.

- Bye, patty, thank you for joining us.

- Thank you so much, thank you. - Yeah.

- My man.

- I'll see you soon. - Goodbye.

- Bye.

- See you later. Simone, the s.S. Simone,

aren't you glad you met me?

- Michael needs to get the f off.

- Simone, I would wife you up any day, seriously.

- Like, bye-bye, thank you for coming.

- Thank you.

- [speaks thai] - take care.

- Thank you. - This way.

- That way.

[ sighs ]

all right, let's go to work.

[ yawns ]

- yeah, so if we hustle, we can finish at 4:00.

Do you want coffee or anything?

- No. Who is she?

[ laughs ]

- ashton, ashton, lee.

Can you get brian up to the master for me?

I got the doctor on his way.

- Copy, cap. - Want me to piggyback you?

- No, I'm good.

- Bro, your left calf is so massive.

- How you doing, doc?

- That's your spot, bro.

- Cheers. Nice to lay all day.

[ sighs ]

- hey, doc. - Hey, doc.

- Let me take a look. - Boy, that thing has blown up.

- It's sore, yes.

- Yeah.

- The thought that it might be an infection

never entered my mind. - Yes.

- I need to get back to work,

so I will take anything right now just to get this thing done.

Whatever it takes. - In the buttocks?

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- Oh, lovely.

- You need a tissue, brian? - No, I'm good.

- Perfect, that's good news, thank you.

- Go back to bed.

- Doctor, is there anything you can do for his face?

[ laughs ]

nothing? Oh.

- Do you want me to do the toilet paper and stuff,

or do you want me to leave that till later?

- Yeah, let's just do it all. - All right.

- Attention all crew,

I need everybody in the crew mess in five.

- Hi. - Hi.

- How's everybody? - Good, thank you.

- This charter... Wow.

I think I would rather have somebody pull me through

a knothole in the fence by my dick

than have these guys back.

You know, when he handed me the tip money and he said

it was gonna leave us speechless,

I was speechless when I opened it up,

and it wasn't in a good way.

[ groaning ]

he left 15,000.

- Ugh.

- [bleep] you, michael. [bleep] you.

- What a chump.

- It's an insult, but I appreciate all of your efforts.

Gratitude is no replacement for cold, hard cash...

- Thank you. - But you have mine.

And this is for brian.

You guys go out tonight, have a little din-din.

Work as long as you feel you need to today

to get the boat flipped. Thank you.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- Can we cover up from top to bottom, please?

- I'm getting a cramp from this stupid steam button.

- I'm excited to see what the night life is like.

- We'll rage! - Make sure we're squared up.

- And that is the end of that.

- I'm trying to remember if I'm forgetting anything.

- Bring nothing you'd want to see tomorrow.

- Oh! - Oh!

- Hey! - Oh, lookie lookie.

- Espresso martini for everyone.

[ laughs ]

we worked our balls off for this charter,

and then he, like, leaves two bucks.

What a dick, you know?

Obviously the helicopter business isn't going so well.

Cheers. - Cheers.

- But it's not gonna ruin my night...

Not tonight.

- Time for a night on the town.

- Boys in here, girls in there.

- Well, that's their loss... Get in.

- Hey, how about this...

You can hook up with simone or rhylee.

- Or rhylee.

- Whoever I [bleep] tonight, I'm gonna bust real quick.

- I just want to dance.

- She wants to make romance. - How do you feel?

Okay, do you, like, like him?

- I don't know him that well. - Right.

- He's just so cute.

- I gotta pee so bad.

- Get outta here!

- I hope no car hits me.

- Come on, dude.

- What's up, ladies? - Hey.

- Hey. - Smells spicy in here.

- Grand slam in here.

- Cool, right?

So you got the intro into the whole crew?

- I haven't really been able to talk to them all.

I had to bro up with you guys. Hard to compare dicks.

- Yours is bigger, rhylee... Yours is bigger.

- Cheers, guys. - Cheers.

- Here's to a good charter and sh--ty tip.

- Good charter and a... - Love you guys.

- Pour one out for my homie.

- Oh, is that for brian? - Yep.

- I'll have one for him, brian's my homie.

- Hey, kevin, will you order some starters?

- Okay. Um, three chicken satay.

- Three chicken satay? - Ugh.

- No, can you order... - You want some prawns?

- ...Something like paleo?

- Yeah, of course, what do you want, salad?

- Some... No, I don't want that, I want something that's,

like, keto or paleo.

- Yeah, let me look at your, like, keto menu.

Oh, there's not one?

- Well, I'm so sorry. - Whatever.

- Excuse me.

- Oh, these are for the paleo.

- I'm not paleo, I just wanted paleo.

- But I'm really gluten-free.

- Yeah, it's like I'm not gluten-free,

I just wanted gluten-free bread.

- If it's good, I'll eat it. But if the chef can...

- If it taste better with flour inside of it, I'll eat it.

- I don't even understand why this is a problem.

What I'd like to do now is drink my weight

in ----ing calories and eat better in food.

- Okay. - This is hilarious.

- That's it.

- You annoy me like the rest of them, it's fine.

- How do you say "[bleep] off" in thailand?

- Any-whoser.

- "can you order something paleo?"

like, who says that?

Like, I'm not the ----ing guy in the back of the kitchen

going, "oh, yeah, okay, we can do that,

"we can do that dietary... We can do that dietary..."

I'm not your personal chef.

I don't mean to, like, abrupt your ----ing salad diet.

- It's not about dieting.

I literally eat whatever the [bleep] I wanna eat.

- Yeah, so what am I supposed to do?

If you're on the diet... - I'm not on the diet.

Like, I just explained that.

I said I literally wanted one entree...

- No, but if you're on the diet...

If you're on the diet, and you look what you want...

- I'm not on the diet, like, get past that.

- Dude, I'm not your chef, all right? Okay?

I'm the charter guests' chef.

- You see, I expected this. You guys are surprised.

- [bleep] off.

- Here we go... First part.

- If you want your diet, you just ----ing find something

on the menu that's ----ing orderable.

- Now, what the [bleep] is the problem?

- Kate and ashton said order whatever you want...

- They said order for the table...

- Yeah, they said order whatever.

- I said, can you add a paleo option.

So now what the [bleep] is the problem?

- Look at the ----ing menu.

- Don't take on a responsibility

if you don't wanna take on the responsibility.

- We haven't even ----ing gone out yet.

Can we keep dinner civil?

- Night out in thailand, yeah! - Please.

- [bleep]'s sake, jesus.

What the hell is going on?

Rhylee, you've been here for a few hours, and already you're,

like, having a full-on go at one of our crewmembers.

I was hoping that rhylee had changed her ways,

but apparently a leopard can't change its spots.

Here we go... Boom.

- I can't remember what I ordered.

- It was something non-paleo. - I didn't order...

- I officially pissed off chef. - Why did you piss him off?

- I have no idea.

- ----Ing hell, dude.

- I just wanted to call her out on it.

If you're on a specific diet, look at the menu yourself

and just go, "hey, kev, can I just get this, just for me."

this is a sh-- charter, topped off by a sh-- tip.

Kate's pissed off at me.

But now I've got ----ing rhylee on my back as well.

Look after your own diet, love.

Like, go [bleep] yourself.

----Ing eat a dick.

- Do you girls want leis? - Yes.

- Yeah? Sure, I'll buy you leis.

- They actually smell really nice.

- Thank you.

- You know, you made me laugh earlier.

That was good banter.

- I really don't know what happened to create such drama.

I'm not trying to start any fights.

Chef was being rude, and that pisses me off.

If he can't handle it, get the chef outta the ----ing kitchen.

[ laughs ] - oh, rhylee.

- And it's like, oh, I don't do that, I do this...

It's like, you ----ing... You're not a guest.

I can't be bothered with that, mate.

- Hey, guys. - Hey, friends.

- Thanks for ordering the food, kev.

- Yes, thank you, chef. - Good job.

- Do not call me "chef," I get annoyed.

- Oh, for [bleep]'s sake.

Well, thank you, whatever the [bleep] you wanna be called.

- Call me just my name.

- Shots!

- Just make sure they're paleo.

Maybe potato vodka? - Potato isn't paleo.

- Oh [bleep].

- I thought you would know that, chef.

- That was sarcasm... Joke, but no?

- Oh, I didn't catch it.

- Wear your baseball glove next time, you'll catch everything.

- Kevin and rhylee fighting is like what would happen

if you broke the rules from the pet store

and put two betta fish in the same tank.

Ultimately, it's a recipe for disaster.

- Like seriously, order your own ----ing food.

- Why are you so ----ing offended?

Tell me, chef.

- Kevin, my man, you have met your match.

He's been super-condescending since day one.

I'm like, yes, thank you, universe,

I knew something would come.

Rhylee, do the damn thing, girl, show him!

- You order your own ----ing shot,

you speak up for your own ----ing shot as well.

- I did. I did. - Oh, my god.

- Now sit the [bleep] down and enjoy your meal.

- What is your problem?

- You're not the special superstar

that you think you are.

- They're having a fight about...

- About nothing.

- He's obnoxious.

- Jesus ----ing christ.

- Kev, come walk with me. - You should walk off.

You don't make any ----ing sense.

- Kev, come walk with me, bro. - [ groaning ]

- I'm not gonna sit here and have a ----ing british,

or whatever the [bleep] he is chef say,

like, oh, I'm so offended.

- It's your second day here and you're already

creating all this drama?

What the [bleep] are you doing?

- If she wants to ----ing make her scene

and ----ing make everything about her,

let her ----ing do that.

It's the best thing you can do is sit back

and ----ing laugh at her.

- Oh, my god, I thought he was, like, kinda the cool one

of the guys in the group.

- I'm not gonna allow her to come in here

and rock the boat with this happy existing family

we ----ing have, because that is what we have.

I don't want you guys to get sucked into that bullsh--.

- Did I make you guys feel uncomfortable?

- We've had many crew nights out,

we've never been in a situation

where we feel embarrassed because of the way

that my crewmembers are acting, okay?

- Crewmembers, not just member. - Crewmem...

Did I say "crewmembers" or did I say "crewmember?"

- you said... I'm just clarifying.

- I said...

Whatever you ----ing heard, I said "crewmembers," plural.

- No, I said... I... - Meaning two people.

- I repeated that.

- Rhylee, you've been on the boat two ----ing days,

and already I'm having déjà-vu

and it's not making me ----ing happy.

- Right. - It's not.

- And why is it déjà-vu?

- You are the only person that has come in here

and there's ----ing drama.

- Okay, so was it me ordering food that was drama, or...

- Rhylee, I'm just giving you the evidence.

- Was it my fault? - Yes, it is.

- Why?

- Because you just raised your voice at me,

and you shouted at me. - What was my attitude?

- The same attitude.

- What, the whole night is because

I just raised my voice at you?

- Can I tell you what the point is?

No matter who was wrong...

- I would love for you to tell me the ----ing point.

- Yeah, shut up and then you can ----ing hear what I'm saying.

- [ gasps ]

that's getting carried away.

- The person who acts out the most, and who reacts,

is the person that looks like the idiot.

Unfortunately, that's you.

- Don't walk away, ashton.

Talk to me about this bullsh--.

- You're a joke. - I'm a joke.

Because what happens is you don't wanna ----ing

talk about the problem, you wanna act like the ----ing--

- he's talked about the problem. - Shut the [bleep] up.

Who the [bleep] are you?

- This is tanner, and he belongs in our ----ing crew.

[ all talking at once ]

- he belongs to the ----ing crew?

So where do I belong, ashton?

- You ----ing belong on a fishing boat in alaska.

- Well, buy me a ----ing ticket, and I'll be back.

- Next, on "below deck."

- do you?

- Finally! Like, damn, son, you took your time.

- A half-dozen ladies. They're all moms.

- I think they're gonna be a good time, polite.

- I think they will.

- So who's gonna urinate on me if I get stung?

- Huh?

- He's a silver fox. - He is a silver fox.

- I'm not sure that you're a great second stew.

- Okay.

- And now you've made our department look bad.

- How's the leg?

- It just sounds like brian's not gonna be able

to finish out the rest of the season.

- For more "below deck," go to bravotv.Com.'