Original subtitles

I'm an ex-con.

How perfectly delightful.

And what she has done is fault by her action. Oh, man, listen to that. I

thought you were a doctor, not a bureaucrat.

You're a rehabilitated ex-con that spent the night in the motorhome of Dr. Gunso

Gates. Oh, did she have a good time?

Well, should I know? I don't go around spying on people.

It's gone.

My diamond brooch. You wouldn't be running away by any chance.

You've already got me tried and convicted.

You're not going anywhere.

I'm placing you under citizen's arrest.

You pull another stunt like this, I'm going to kick your butt right out of

here.

Okay.

Thank you.

Miss, would you be so good as to get me a doctor?

Or is this a self-service station?

I'm sorry.

Doctor?

This patient's in shock.

She's vasoconstricted and her pulse is 120.

All right, put him in room five. Get a neuroman to see him.

Well, it's real thready.

Okay, over here.

Patients in shock. Now start an IV with a large-bore needle and get a CBC.

Type in processor for four units of whole blood.

Hey, hey, where are you going?

Home. No way. Need you right here.

Doctor, I don't work here.

I was just applying for a job.

Nurse?

Nurse's aide. I didn't get it. Why not?

I was short one letter of recommendation.

Oh, bureaucrats.

Doctor, what does it take to get your full attention?

Rigor mortis?

Take the lady inside.

Am I allowed to?

No. Doctor?

But, uh, that's how I got my job.

Dr. Kenyon, please call recovery.

Madam, those jewels should be in the hospital safe. Over my dead body? Good

Lord, you're... Claudia Aerosmith, yes.

Yes, you were the chairperson at the celebrity golf tournament for leukemia

at my club.

Please, chairlady, I don't like the idea of being de-sexed.

Dear lady, if you weren't a patient, I would... What would you?

Take Mrs. Aerosmith to room five immediately. Why aren't you in uniform?

Never mind, doctor. Just deposit me in lost and fun. Room five at once.

Trapper?

Claudia? Well, don't tell me my accident had disfigured me that much.

What on earth are you doing here? Oh, just a little nastiness on the freeway.

How nasty?

Well, the radio report said non-penetrating trauma to the abdomen.

Doctor? Well, of course, I'll make a thorough examination.

You see, I'll go to any extreme for attention.

Yes, well, you will get all the attention you deserve. Dr. Riverside

here will take very good care of you.

What about you?

I'll look in on you later.

You know Claudia Arrowsmith?

How well?

We're old friends. I took her to the opera twice.

She's been known to marry men for less than that. John, can we talk about...

Good luck.

Just a moment.

I would still like to know why you're not in uniform.

I don't work here.

Then what right do you have to be dealing with the patient?

You told me to.

Oh, very quick with the tricky answers, aren't we? I'll handle this, Stan.

Where are you taking me?

As personnel director, I am obligated to request the usual letter of

recommendation. You got some paper?

Here we go.

What are you doing?

One M or two in recommendation.

Dr. Gates, do you actually know this girl's work?

Are you kidding? I've known her ever since she worked at, uh... St.

Catherine's, near Fresno. Right, and she worked there for a long time. Almost two

years.

Right, and just a little while ago, I saw her save a patient's life.

Well, she had no right to do that. She's not employed here.

I know. I was furious, and so was the patient. Can you imagine having your

life saved by a perfect stranger?

Dr. Gates, whenever we hire any employee, there are certain prescribed

procedures that must be followed.

Then follow.

And you write the letter. I'll sign it later.

Let's get you suited up. We need you in the next shift.

You looking for me, Trevor?

Yeah.

Who's Pancreas?

Claudia Arrowsmith.

Ooh, looks like I got knocked around pretty good.

Oh, yeah.

What's your prognosis?

You called me in here to give you advice on pancreas?

No, I called you in here to give you advice on the hiring of nurses' aides.

Uh-huh.

Ms. Langley's been whispering in your pink little ear.

Now, who is Lauren?

What's her name?

I don't know. I just met her.

You just met her?

In the parking lot.

And you don't even know her?

No. And yet you insisted on hiring her. Why?

Because I saw her working on a patient. She's a pro-trapper. Wait a minute. You

saw her working on a patient when?

This morning. Had she already been hired?

No. Then why was she working on a patient?

Because everybody else was busy and the patient was in trouble. She moved right

in, took over, and did everything right.

What are you getting so upset about, Trapper? You know how badly we need

nurses' aides, and this one is a real prize.

Okay, okay.

She may be Florence Nightingale's daughter for all I know, but still,

there are rules and regulations, right?

You bet there are.

Certain prescribed procedures must be followed. Man, Langley must have really

pulled a fancy number on you.

All Langley did was file the report. I'm the one who's making all the fuss about

this. Why? Don't you want a good nurse's aide on your staff?

Oh, now, that's really a dumb question.

Take my word for it, Trapper. She has all the training and experience that we

need. Well, that's not quite enough.

You know, I'd like to know a few things about the people we hire, you know. A

few simple character references, a little information on their background.

I mean, is that too much to ask?

Why'd you hire me, Trapper?

Because you're good at what you do.

But all you know about me is what I told you. Now, how do you know I wasn't

lying? Okay, so maybe you're taking a mail-order course in surgery and

spending your evenings making obscene phone calls. Come on.

We checked you out.

Thoroughly. And what's more, my instincts told me everything I wanted to

know. And my instincts tell me that this girl belongs on our staff. And when you

see her work, I know you'll agree.

Now, come on, Trapper. Loosen up.

Give the girl a chance.

You pull another stunt like this, I'm going to kick your butt right out of

here.

Be sure to forward my mail. I'd hate to miss my next surgery lesson.

This is Mrs.

Claudia Aerosmith in room 506.

I'd like to talk to somebody about the decor of my hospital room. It's

abominable.

I would like it completely redone. Come in.

Will you have someone call me, please? First thing tomorrow, thank you.

Well, come in, Alma. Don't just stand there.

What took you so long?

In case you've forgotten, I'm on vacation.

I drove 120 miles to bring you some treasures.

I'd like my cologne first.

Well,

there's not much of it. What did you do, drink it?

You expect me to face you without a mild anesthetic?

Hello,

Trapper.

When can I get out of this snake pit?

Well, I see your friends have found you.

Who?

Alma?

That's not a friend. I pay her for her company.

Well, I charge for my company, too.

Oh, yes.

How much is all this magnificence going to cost me?

Well, time and patience.

The pain in your abdomen seems to be coming from an injury to the pancreas.

I'm going to give you some antibiotics and hope that it goes away.

And if it doesn't?

Well, you might have to have a little surgery, but that's a decision that's a

long way off.

Well, as long as I'm sentenced to stay in this miserable rock pile, I'll need a

larger room.

Oh, Claudia, that's nonsense.

What?

My darlings, I need space.

When my friends find out I'm here, there's going to be nothing but wall-to

-wall people, not to mention the wires and flowers and steamer baskets of sour

fruit. You know what it's like, Trapper.

Let's see what I can do.

And I want a much bigger room, love, preferably with paisley wallpaper.

Claudia, you haven't changed a bit.

Well, we'll start on those phone calls, Alma.

Get in touch with Fredda and Buddy, the whole Marin crowd.

Sorry, Claudia, I'm still on vacation.

Vacation, indeed. What were you hoping to find in Portland?

A nearsighted sailor who wouldn't notice the bags under your eyes? You want to

work for me, you get all those phones.

Good night, Claudia.

Feel better?

Got it all worked out, John. Very simple solution.

To what?

The Claudia Aerosmith problem.

She needs a larger room, right?

All we do is transfer Congressman Donaldson to the Veterans Hospital.

Come on, Stanley, you can't do that. Why not? He wasn't even re-nominated.

You want to lose Claudia Arrowsmith to a lame duck?

Is it true that you graduated with an A-plus in medical ethics?

A-minus.

She'll get a larger room when one becomes available.

That way we don't have to pull the plug on anybody.

Sam, don't you realize what this could mean to the hospital?

Do you see those rocks she was wearing?

A diamond brooch on a hospital gown? That, my friend, is class.

Hey, Trapper.

Starch. Hi, got to see you a minute. You got it. I'll have a word with

Congressman Lane. We got a problem with that nurse's aide, Lorne McCaffrey. Uh

-uh, so?

In here.

Oh,

no big thing, Dr. Riverside. Nothing you should concern yourself about.

Miss Willoughby, everything that happens in this hospital is the concern of each

and every one of us. Isn't that right, John?

Not necessarily.

John?

All right, come on.

Miss Langley from personnel just called me. She gave me this report.

The McCaffrey girl never worked at St. Catharines.

Who said she did?

She did in her application.

Well, I hear she's a terrific worker. Where'd she get her experience?

Working in a hospital.

In state prison.

Prison? She served two years for armed robbery.

She completed her sentence and even got time off for good behavior.

Then there's no problem.

No problem? Are you out of your mind?

We can't have an ex-convict working on our staff.

What if she got a hold of our narcotics? We can't expose our inmates to a

dangerous person like that.

Stanley, they're patients, not inmates.

Now get a grip on yourself.

I'll look into this.

This is a serious matter, John.

Our patients will never accept that girl.

Neither will the board of directors.

Well, how are they going to find out?

Oh, don't tell me I know.

I can't help it.

I have an unlimited sense of responsibility.

Before we strap her into the chair, how about questioning a criminal? Let's see

what her point of view is.

Oh, boy, you know, you're really something. I put 30 years into medicine

and you act like I'm some kind of a prosecuting attorney.

Hello, Mrs. Arrowsmith.

Time for your pain pills. Well, I'm sure they'll taste much better than that

miserable lunch.

Blame that on your medical condition.

An injury to the pancreas usually causes a loss of appetite. A tribute to the

good judgment and taste of my pancreas. I mean, look at this glop.

Anything else I can do for you?

Yes.

Would you...

Find out who has been misdirecting my flowers, my calls, my visitors.

Misdirecting? Well, they're not here, are they? They must be going someplace.

Be an angel.

Check up on it, will you?

Of course.

Good morning, nurse.

How's she doing today? About the same. Are you a relative?

No, no, I'm her secretary.

Oh, good. Do you know of any flowers that haven't been delivered or visitors

who haven't been able to find her?

No, no, I'm almost certain there haven't been any.

Thanks.

Here's your mail. I'm fine.

Thanks for asking.

That's it?

That's it. What have you been telling people?

Well, a lot of them weren't home.

I left some messages.

I don't believe you.

Unless you've been making my situation seem unimportant.

Oh, Claudia, I've been trying to tell you for years. These dear friends of

yours, you bought them all with the fancy parties and the expensive little

gifts. They're not friends you can count on.

They come and they eat your food and they drink your drinks, but they're not

around when you need them.

I think you should leave.

Oh, Claudia, you're getting old enough to face a few facts.

Get out of this room. Get out of my life!

I'll mail you your severance pay.

Don't you want me to wait till you are back on your feet?

Why? You think I need you?

I don't need anyone.

Except perhaps an occasional husband for a change of pace.

As far as I'm concerned, you're through.

Uh, excuse me. I'm supposed to take Mrs. Yarsworth to radiology.

One more X-ray and I'm going to light up in the dark.

Aren't you the young lady I spoke to yesterday at the ambulance?

Yes, ma'am.

Well, do you enjoy working here?

Sure. It's great.

Any big ambitions for the future?

Nursing school.

Maybe. If I can afford it.

Lauren, Dr.

McIntyre wants to see you in his office.

Now? I have to take Mrs. Davis. Go ahead. I'll take care of that.

Perhaps we can talk some more one day.

About what?

Your future.

Yeah, okay.

Let's go.

X-ray technician on call, DeFore West, stat.

X-ray technician, DeFore West, stat.

Okay, Lauren, you want to tell us about St. Catharines?

Am I fired?

Okay, if I ask the questions. Why?

You know all the answers. That's why I'm here, right?

Wrong.

I never worked at St. Catharines.

Where did you work?

The prison hospital.

I lied on my application.

I get paid for the hours I put in.

Lauren, would you please quit trying to fire yourself?

Why? So you can have the fun of catching me in every lie?

Lauren, we would like to keep you on, but you're not making it easy for us.

I applied for work at six other places. This is the seventh.

At the other six, I told the truth.

That's not what they wanted.

Sorry, the position's filled. If anything comes up...

All I wanted was a chance.

Just a chance to show what I could do.

After two years of doing time, I thought I could start clean.

Well... It's a real laugh.

What I really got was a life sentence.

You were convicted of armed robbery. Do you want to tell us about it?

No.

Okay, start from the beginning.

Boyfriend and I, we knocked over a gas station.

He needed the bread.

I didn't know how to say no.

You want details, call my parole officer.

Oh, I don't think that'll be necessary.

I'd like to keep you on here, but we do have to take it up with the board of

directors. So what do I do in the meantime?

You stay on the job.

This is just a way to let me down easy, isn't it?

No.

Not true.

But it is a new kind of problem for us.

I mean, we want to be fair to you, and there are other people to consider.

Board of Directors, patients.

Right, right.

I might mug a sick old lady in the elevator, right?

See you, Doc.

Thanks for trying to help.

Hey, wait a minute.

Look, I think we can fix this.

My lawyer said... Until the board meets, you just keep doing what you're supposed

to do. If Riverside gives you any problems, you come to me. Who are you

kidding? I've been through this charade. I know I'm out.

You are not out. We're trying to prevent that.

Hey, why are you sticking your neck out for me?

What's in it for you?

Because maybe I like you. Did you ever think of that?

for a lousy x-ray of my pancreas I could have had it bronzed in less time.

Why, start!

I'll take it from here.

Don't tell me you're still working for Trapper. Well, of course.

I can't imagine all those years with the same man.

I mean, isn't your work sort of... Rewarding?

No. Challenging?

No. Boring is actually what I had in mind.

With Trapper, never.

Oh, come on. 30 years of watching the same old faces, arteries, spleens,

ulcers. There must be more to life than that.

More thrilling than a corroded artery?

Bite your tongue.

What you need is variety. Look at you watching the world go by.

You remember the phrase, starch, life is a banquet?

And I'm doing fine with a pickled herring, thank you. But you could have

so much more.

What, and give up all this?

As it happens, I'm looking for a secretary.

Well...

A traveling companion, a confidant, social coordinator.

Tinker tailor, cowboy sailor. Well, with me, you'd be seeing the world.

Why, we'd be leaving for Cannes next week.

And I can promise you a wealthier, not to mention healthier group of people.

Does that mean I'd have to have my mink pressed?

Starch, I'm serious.

Claudia, I couldn't leave here.

I'm...

I'm very, uh... I'm very happy here.

I've got my friends and people who love me here.

Besides, Trapper needs me.

This hospital needs me.

Thank you, Claudia, but my life is really very poor.

Yes. I'm sure it is.

Well, that's more like it.

Now, do you want to bring the round bouquet right here by the phone?

Okay.

Yep.

That's fine.

And put the oblong one right here on this table.

And the...

Steamer basket of sour fruit right there on the table. Thank you. You're welcome.

This is Claudia Aerosmith at San Francisco Memorial.

My order has just been delivered.

But I ordered three bouquets of flowers, not two.

All right, then. Fine.

Tomorrow I'll have to do, won't it?

Goodbye.

Well, these flowers are beautiful.

This is just the beginning. I'm going to have so many, I'm going to have to have

a larger room.

Well, I don't think you should worry about that right now, Claudia.

Oh?

Do I have something else to worry about? The antibiotics don't seem to be

working. I think there might be a cyst forming near the pancreas.

Oh, dear.

Is that serious?

Well, we may have to operate to remove it.

Well, we'll know more about that after we see your last set of x-rays.

We can't get some talented little artist to come in and retouch the film?

Ordinarily, I wouldn't bother you with this, but if surgery is necessary, you

might be in for a rather long convalescence.

So I thought you might like to get in touch with Alma and make sure there's

someone to look after you.

Alma?

That poor girl was coming so unglued all over the place, I had to let her go.

You're going to have to have somebody.

Well...

You don't have to worry about little old me.

One thing I've never lacked love is friends.

I'm going to have so many of them here, I'm going to need an unlisted room.

I'm sure you will.

Ma'am?

See you later.

Please call the O.R. Lauren?

Yes, ma'am.

Come in here. Shut the door.

What are you doing?

Carpentry?

I have to help Dr.

Gates in orthopedics.

Tell me, what are you making here?

Why?

How would you like a job with a real future?

Doing what?

As my secretary companion.

Fringe benefits include a guest house, a car.

All your meals, of course, lots of traveling, $600 a month, and the chance

to meet young men who offer a lot more.

Now, can your hospital match that?

No, they sure can't.

Well, then it's all settled.

Oh, no, ma'am. I appreciate the offer and everything, but I've never

done secretarial work, and you really don't know anything about me.

Was it something I should know?

You had an affair with a gorilla?

Was your grandmother arrested for indecent exposure?

Sometime I'll tell you about my grandmother.

I, uh, better get back to work. Dr. Gates is waiting for me.

Wait a minute.

There is something.

Something you are not eager to reveal.

Forget it.

I'll find out, Lauren, one way or another.

Okay.

I'm an ex-con.

Yardbird, prisoner, convicted felon. How perfectly delightful.

What did you do?

I robbed a gas station.

Well, that's a switch.

But I'm sure by now you're completely rehabilitated.

Yeah, I guess so.

Despite your checkered career, I have absolute faith in you. I'm perfectly

willing to take a chance.

Thanks, Mrs. Aerosmith.

I appreciate that. I mean it.

But there are some people around here.

They've been real nice to me. And I kind of have an obligation to stick around

for them.

I don't believe this.

I've just been rejected by an ex-con.

I must be out of my mind.

All right, young lady, run along.

Oh, wow. At last, I can scratch my leg.

How's that?

It's beautiful. All right.

Ah, ecstasy.

Never mind the ecstasy. Let's see you move it. Wiggle your foot.

Ow, that hurts.

Your muscles need loosening up. Physical therapy tomorrow.

Exercise twice a day.

Will you exercise with me?

At ease, pal.

Not bad.

Three new casts, two casts removed, and six dressings changed.

And in less than two hours.

Hey, you were supposed to go off duty an hour ago. Mm-hmm. So were you.

I think we've earned ourselves a drink.

Will you join me?

I'd love to.

Good.

After I change my clothes and sign out?

Okay, I'll meet you in the Titanic.

The what?

Oh, that motorhome out in the parking lot. It's where I live.

Okay. See you in half an hour.

She's kind of stuck on you. You know that, don't you?

Isn't everyone?

Voila! What is it?

Chateau Guns, 79.

Oh, I'm on parole.

I'm not allowed to.

Oh, that's right. I forgot about that.

How about some ginger ale?

Beautiful.

I love that shirt.

Thought it might lend a touch of dignity to the occasion.

I'm sorry.

My fault. I should be more careful.

That's my big trouble.

Never careful enough.

What do you mean?

Oh, you know.

Always picking the wrong flowers.

Looking under the wrong rocks.

My sister.

She was the good little girl.

I was the useless one.

The tramp.

That's not the picture I get.

That's what they told me while I was growing up.

So I took off.

Split.

Hooked up with this guy.

Because he made me feel useful.

Took all that time in prison to teach me what useful really meant.

You learned it pretty well.

I'm learning about kindness, too.

From you.

And Dr.

McIntyre, but especially you.

Oh.

I'm not used to being treated like this.

Why not?

Don't you think you're worth it?

I never used to.

But now... No.

A reminder.

I got a check on a post-op patient.

You want to stick around and like it back?

Do you want me to?

If you like.

No.

I better go home.

John?

John?

Ah, good morning, Stanley.

I suppose you know about last night?

Your rehabilitated ex-convict spent the night in the motorhome of Dr. Gonzo

Gates. Oh, did she have a good time?

Well, should I know? I don't go around spying on people.

Then what are we talking about?

She's on parole.

That means she may not drink alcohol or beverages. She may not engage illicitly

in moral turpitude.

The board should know about that, don't you?

Well, um...

Do you have any proof of the young lady's transgressions? John, it stands

to reason, doesn't it, knowing Gonzo Gates?

Stanley, you know, with your education, I wonder if you've ever considered

practicing a little medicine on the side.

In this film, you can see the displacement of the adjacent structures

by the mass.

Looks like a pseudocyst of the pancreas secondary to the trauma.

What are you planning to do about it?

Well, she's still in a lot of pain, and it's not getting any better.

Dr. McIntyre, I'd like to schedule surgery tomorrow, 9 a.m.

Mrs. Claudia Arrowsmith.

No, I'm not ready for surgery.

Where is Chopper John?

He's not here.

He'll be here in a moment, Mrs. Arrowsmith.

Correction, he's here. Oh, Chopper Johnny.

You know, there was a bleak spell between husband number three and four

when I seriously considered you as a candidate.

I believe I was married at the time. You could have fooled me.

I think we better go.

Wait, wait.

Let me see.

Oh, my hair.

Would somebody get me a bed jacket? The green one that'll match my complexion.

Claudia, believe me.

Underneath an oxygen mask and a sheep, you all look alike.

Well, you'll know me by the brooch that I'm wearing.

It's gone.

My diamond brooch. It was an anniversary gift from my third husband, and it's

gone. I'm not going to leave this room until you find it. This room should be

locked. Do you hear me? I want it locked. For heaven's sakes, we'll find

it for you.

That brooch was worth an absolute fortune.

They've just got to find it. I'm going to sue the hospital for a great deal of

money if it isn't found.

What's this about a missing brooch? Stanley, what are you doing up here? Why

aren't you down an emergency?

Well, I came up to wish Ms. Aerosmith good luck in surgery, but any idea who

took that brooch?

Nobody. It's in the room somewhere.

Don't bet on it, John.

There are thieves in this hospital, you know.

Dr. Branca, please call your office.

Just one moment, young lady.

I'd like a word with you. Where do you think you're going?

Home.

In the middle of the morning?

It's my day off.

I just came by to pick up my paycheck.

Mm-hmm. You wouldn't be running away by any chance.

From what?

From being searched.

A diamond brooch has mysteriously vanished.

But of course, you know that, don't you?

Listen to that.

You've already got me tried and convicted.

You're not going anywhere.

I'm placing you under citizen's arrest.

I stopped being a citizen two years ago.

Guard! Officer! Stop that girl. Stop that woman.

Oh, boy.

Now, there's a lot of inflammation.

Uh-huh. Look at that.

Damn, it's not going to be easy. Hemostat.

Here's one, and here's another one for good measure.

Now you read my mind.

What's the blood pressure?

110 over 80, pulse and respiration stable.

We're going to have to clamp off that bleeder.

Uh-oh. Oh, medium hemostat.

My, my, you're slipping.

Okay, there it is.

There's the cyst.

All right, can we have some drains? We'll be ready to close in about five

minutes. Before you close, look around in there for the diamond brooch.

How is she? How's Mrs. Arrowsmith? She's gonna be all right. I don't think she's

gonna kill Claudia.

Good. When she wakes up, tell her I've got wonderful news. I found the thief.

Yeah? What thief?

The one who stole her brooch.

You know who it was?

It was your protege, Gates.

Your sweet little ex-convict.

Can you prove that, Stanley?

It all adds up.

She drew her wages and tried to cop a sneak.

I nailed her while she was making a getaway.

When I put the finger on her, she couldn't look me in the eye. I can

identify with that.

What are you gonna do with her?

I placed her under citizen's arrest.

The security guard's ever locked in their office.

The police will be here any... Stanley, you better be right, because if you're

not, I'm gonna stake her to the meanest, dirtiest personal injury lawyer in this

town. He's gonna hit you with defamation of character, false arrest... Now, wait

a minute. Now, I didn't actually accuse her of anything. I...

You understand, don't you, John? I mean, I would never overstep the bounds of...

You almost did.

Too bad you came in. I was just about ready to break this window. Don't be

stupid. You run away now, it's like an admission of guilt. Oh, man, I was born

guilty. Come on, let's get out of here before the cops show up. Guard!

I'm taking her with me. I'm sorry, sir. Dr. Riverside said to keep her here.

You tell Riverside I want the pleasure of turning her in. Any questions, call

the chief of surgery.

In here. I want to talk to you.

Now listen to me. I want you to stay here and fight this out. And end up

doing time again. No way, ma'am. You're making a big mistake, Lauren.

So I'm making a big mistake.

What do you care?

I care because I need you.

You need me?

Of course I do.

You're the best nurse's aide this place ever had.

Nurse's aide.

That's all I am to you.

Look.

You're a very beautiful lady.

And any man would be lucky to have you. I admit, I'm attracted to you.

I'd be an idiot if I wasn't.

But... I think what you want, what you deserve, is a full commitment.

And I'm just not ready for that yet.

I'd just be taking advantage of the situation.

A little ex-con isn't good enough for you, right? Don't be ridiculous. You

don't believe that. Oh, what do you expect me to believe?

You treated me like you'd been waiting for me all your life.

Like I was some kind of a princess.

And all the while, I was nothing but a lousy hired hand.

Hey, wait a minute now. I never... You never what?

Made me feel like you cared about me.

Like I was the only woman in your life.

You're wrong.

And I was wrong to believe it.

Hold on, where are you going?

Out of here, away from you. Don't try and... Lauren!

I'm sorry.

Yeah, sure you're sorry.

You did that on purpose.

So you could see what I had in me. Now go ahead.

Take a look.

See how many diamond brooches you can find.

Yeah, well, get over here right away. It's important.

Right. Thanks.

Look off.

Lord?

Oh, that's great.

The board just agreed to let me decide whether or not to keep her.

Couldn't you stop her?

It's no big deal.

What kind of talk is that? Every cop in this town is going to be looking for

her. She can take care of herself.

And I have a feeling she'll be back here very soon.

How come you're so sure?

Now, this is what I call payday.

Don't look right into a gentleman, you'll go blind.

Where'd you find it? In the ward kitchen, in the cold broccoli.

Must have fallen into Mrs. Aerosmith's food tray.

For a great lady, she's sure a sloppy eater.

Good work, Starch.

I'll take this to Claudia right away.

Of course, if she insists on giving a cash reward.

You're terrible.

Tell her I'll toss her for a double or nothing.

Oh, you found it.

In the cold broccoli.

Thank you, Trapper.

How are you feeling?

Oh, much better now.

I had so many flowers in them, I couldn't breathe.

So I sent most of them down to the children's ward.

Well, you can take some home with you.

Home? Oh, Trapper.

They died there.

Flowers can't live in a vacuum.

Nothing can.

Not even non-existent flowers.

Non-existent?

You've been humoring me.

You see, I ordered all those flowers myself. Nobody sent me any.

Nobody sent anything, not even a postcard.

Alma was right.

I have been trying to buy all my friends.

Suddenly, I'm frightened.

I'm alone, and I'm terribly frightened.

There isn't anybody.

Oh, yes, there is.

Alma? I brought you your mail.

Have you forgiven me?

I have some new magazines for you.

Is that the only reason you're here?

Look here, you silly creature. Somebody has to take care of you, so it might as

well be me.

At least I'm used to your ill nature.

I have no need of your favors.

Favors? I expect to be paid for every hour I spend with you.

And I want a 10% raise.

I'm an employee, not a friend.

How

can

you be so sure?

I just know she'll be back, that's all. Well, how do you know? I mean, how can

you possibly know?

Hey! Hey! Hey, you!

See? I'm coming up. You hear me? I'm coming up. Well, come on up, then.

Pulling a bush league stunt like this?

Okay, hot shot, what'd you do with it? With what?

My wallet. And don't tell me you don't have it. You palmed it when I dropped my

purse, right?

Isn't that right?

You mean... like that?

And they call me a crook.

You know, I have a good mind to call the cops on you.

Or Dr.

Riverside.

What'd you do a dumb thing like that for?

Well, I had to be sure you'd come back, didn't I?

You guys don't want me back.

Oh, now, hold on. Wait a minute.

I thought the board had agreed to let me decide that. Why don't you stick around?

Ginger ale?

Uh, no. I gotta be going.

No. Wait.

Don't go.

I can't get anywhere with him.

He thinks of me as a friend.

Friend?

That's absolutely disgusting.

Yeah.

Here's to friendship.

Not bad.

An excellent bouquet.

A good year.