Original subtitles

[crow caws]

[quacks]

[bats squeal]

[opening theme song playing]

♪ Adventure Time Come on, grab your friends ♪

♪ We'll go to very Distant lands ♪

♪ With Jake the Dog And Finn the Human ♪

♪ The fun will never end ♪

♪ Adventure Time ♪

[whispering] Side Quests.

Yo, have you been hearing all these rumors going around?

Something about a secret kingdom mission.

What is up with that?

[Finn] I don't know anything about the mission,

but that's gotta be why

Princess Bubblegum said to come by.

A whole unknown kingdom? I can only imagine.

It would have to be something so crazy

that public knowledge of it

would throw our whole society out of whack.

Like if it was

-a sandwich kingdom. - [sandwiches cheering]

[Jake] And it's just like a whole land of beings

preparing themselves

for the sole purpose of being eaten.

It wouldn't make any economic sense.

- [chomping] - And the whole Land of Ooo

would be thrown into delicious chaos.

Ooh!

And that's why it has to be a secret.

That doesn't merit a closely guarded secret, Jake.

It would be an invisible sealed pit in the wasteland.

- [ominous music playing] - And within,

would be a prison of demons...

Whoa.

- [demons growling] - [Finn] ...spiraling down

into a deep gravitational core.

- [demons screaming] - And the only way to stop them

from invading Ooo

would be to battle down to the very bottom.

But once you traveled all the way

- into the infinite depths... - [demon screams]

...the heat and gravity

would've slowly tempered your body

-to such extremes... - [ominous music ends]

...that returning to the surface

would no longer be an option.

That would be good too.

I just want in on that secret.

- Yeah, man. - [laughs] Yeah.

- Hey, guys. - Hi, Princess.

- 'Sup? - Thanks for coming.

I have a really important mission for you.

- [Jake] Yes! - Tell us!

I need you to guard

the wet paint on the royal gazebo.

People keep trying to steal it.

- And Starchy is getting... - [humming] It's me.

...really stressed out.

Hey! Hey, you, get out of here.

Go! Get! I'll kill you!

Oh, man, I shouldn't have said that.

[Princess Bubblegum] So, yeah, I need you

to watch the paint dry so he can go on vacation.

[both disappointingly] Mmm.

I think we were misled about some rumors

regarding a secret kingdom?

Oh, no, no, no, that's another mission

that this guy is handling.

[Punchy] Who, me? Oh. [hesitates]

Hey. My name's Punchy.

I can't see your face.

Come on out, Punchy.

[Punchy] Oh. Okay.

[wall rumbling]

- Whoa! - [grunts]

Uh... Oh, no. Sorry.

I was just doing what you said.

Oh, no, no, no.

[Princess Bubblegum] It's okay, Punchy.

You're doing exactly

- what you were supposed to do. - [metal clanking]

Punchy's mission is to deliver this peace treaty

- to the Secret Kingdom. - [mystical music plays]

So you don't want us to handle it?

- No, Jake. - [safe clangs]

This is extremely sensitive.

If the mission were to get sidetracked

or delayed at all,

war could break out between the kingdoms.

I need perfect types, not adventure types.

Punchy follows instructions exactly.

So the directions on this ancient punch card

can guide him to the secret location

of the Secret Kingdom.

[Punchy] Yes, Princess.

I will not fail in this mission.

I'm a very reliable, regular guy.

"Regular"? You're gonna trust

- this busted robot-- - [shushes]

Please don't call Punchy a robot.

[muffled] He has no idea.

- Huh? - It's okay, Punchy.

Launch yourself into truck form

and deliver the treaty.

Yes, Princess. I will launch now.

[Punchy rattles into truck form]

[truck clangs]

Now, I'll show you two to the gazebo.

You comin'?

[both sigh in disappointment]

Here's the paint.

All right, Starchy, you can go on vacation now.

Phew.

All I can do now is blow off steam

in this no-seatbelt death trap

and try to repair my soul.

- [screaming] - [engine revving]

[grumbling angrily]

[yells] No!

I don't trust that robot to deliver that treaty.

- Yeah. - Yeah.

Like if he farts on his own wire

- and that flips him evil. - Yeah!

- [playful music playing] - There he goes.

[shutter rattles]

Oh. Who slammed my butt?

I could just stop and investigate.

But I'd rather just follow

these punch-out instructions exactly

and not deviate from the mission.

And that's me exerting my free will

to do exactly what I was told.

Ugh, it's kind of cramped in here

for a box truck.

Hmm. Must be his robot guts or something.

Which is further evidence that this Punchy guy

is not what he appears to be on the outside.

- [truck rattles] - [both grunt]

- What was that? - [grunting]

[eyes pop]

[Jake] Man, I can't see squat.

[Punchy] What the heck? There's a hole in the planet?

Is that another universe down there?

With another me down there too?

My directive is to stick to the road.

What am I supposed to do?

Oh, man! Sounds like he's gonna put

a hole in the planet.

We'll deal with that later.

First, we gotta get that piece of paper back.

Then we gotta take this homie out right now.

[car horn honking]

[Starchy] Yo, road hog,

you're creating a bottleneck with your big caboose!

- Move it, dude! - [water splashes]

Be more self-aware!

[Punchy] "Move it, dude"?

Oh. Okay.

- I can move it, dude. - [engine sputtering]

[engine revving]

Okay, maybe I was a little hasty

about the full traitor thing.

Let's sit tight and keep an eye on things.

- Good plan. - [tires screeching]

- Now what? - [Punchy] Uh, hello? Hello?

Who is he talking to?

[Punchy] Sir, please.

Why are you doing this?

People are meant to cross the road.

That's why Glob created two sides.

My... My internal processing won't allow me to go

until you cross one way or the other.

- [system beeping] - What do I do?

How do I follow my instructions

if he stays there forever?

- Can you hear that? - Yeah.

Sounds like he's asking for instructions

from some kind of evil organization

who wanna sabotage the peace treaty!

We gotta slay this guy right now.

Agreed.

- [truck parts whirring] - [both groaning]

- What's happening? - [grunting] He heard us.

He's gonna torture us, dude.

[Punchy] Sir, are you intentionally

trying to hinder my mission?

[punch card holder whirring]

Sir, my instructions are very clear.

If you don't provide new inputs,

I'll just have to...

Uh...

All right, well...

[whirring]

[both screaming]

[scarecrow whooshes]

Oh, bother. I gotta mosey, or I'll be late.

You think you can torture us into submission?

We'll never break!

Don't tempt him, dude.

We don't know what this sicko is...

- [truck parts whir] - [straining] ...capable of.

[upbeat music playing]

[both thudding and grunting]

- [Jake] Whoa! - [Finn grunts]

[Finn, Jake grunt]

- [Finn, Jake's voice shaking] - [bridge rattling]

[weakly] Jake?

- [weakly] I'm dying. - [tires screech]

[eagle calls]

- [Punchy] "Stop"? - [curious music playing]

Okay.

Then what?

And then what? [echoes]

- [system beeping] - Okay, okay, okay.

Stop sign.

- Stop sign... - [punch card holder whirring]

Mmm.

There's nothing in my code about this?

- [whirring continues] - Oh, man, are you for real?

[groaning angrily]

[electricity crackling]

- [electricity crackling] - [both groaning]

- [Punchy shrieking] - [electricity crackling]

- [engine revving] - [clanging]

Hey, Ding-a-Ling, this road is for cars only!

But... But what about the stop sign?

Roads are for driving. That's the rule.

- [sign clangs] - I'm free!

Get a job!

One last mile.

- [metal clanking] - You can do this.

[Punchy rattles into truck form]

[truck clangs]

- [engine revving] - [thuds]

[both] We're free!

And we nabbed the treaty!

And that's what you get when you hire non-robots.

- You get the goods. - [laughs]

Okay. Now let's scoot before--

- [Punchy] No stealing! - [Finn] Ahhh!

We knew it!

We knew you were a traitor all along!

You're interfering with my directive.

Uh, was that okay?

Was that an okay punch?

[Jake] I'll show you an okay punch.

- Zoop! - Whoo!

- [dramatic music playing] - [inhales] Whomp.

Princess Bubblegum should never

have trusted a robot that--

- [shushes] He doesn't know. - Oh, yeah.

- [thuds] - [Jake grunts]

[grunts] Beep, bop, boop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop,

bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop.

- [rapid thudding] - [Jake groaning]

[grunts]

- [Jake groaning] - Whoa!

[Punchy grunts and thuds]

Jake, to the Secret Kingdom!

Somewhere over there probably!

[tense music playing]

[Jake grunts and thuds]

[clanking]

[safe lock clatters]

[tense music intensifies]

- The treaty! - [Punchy] My life's purpose!

[grunting and panting]

[ground rumbling]

- [truck engine accelerating] - [Punchy grunting]

- [loud crash] - [Jake grunts]

- [both] Traitor! - [Punchy] Traitor!

- [both] Traitor! - [Punchy] Traitor!

[stranger] Hey.

[all gasp]

Is this the Secret Kingdom?

[stranger] Can you keep a secret?

- [curious music playing] - Yeah.

[strangers whispers] It is.

- [quietly] Yes. - [quietly] I knew it.

[clears throat] Greetings.

Um, hi. I am here to deliver a treaty

from the Candy Kingdom!

[stranger in normal voice] Wait.

Bubblegum was only supposed to send one dumb messenger.

Which one of you is a robot?

[in normal voice] Uh, well, this guy's not a robot.

He's just a regular guy.

Isn't that right, Punchy?

Hmm? Super regular, right?

Uh, yeah. I'm just a regular guy.

- [trap door rattles] - [Punchy screams]

- [fire crackling] - [shredder whirring]

[metal pieces clattering]

[both] We're the robot.

[stranger] Excellent.

- [slit shutter clicks] - You may enter.

- [gate rumbling] - [exhilarating music playing]

[Jake exclaims]

[Finn, Jake] Secret Kingdom!

[Jake] Yay! [laughing excitedly]

- [Finn] Ooh, yeah! - [laughing continues]

[both] Huh?

[in sing-song voice] Hello!

Um...

Hey, is this the secret waiting room or something?

[in normal voice] Nope.

This is the Secret Kingdom.

We've got hundreds of thousands of secrets,

all stored in these filing cabinets.

But they're, like, cool and exciting secrets, right?

See for yourself.

You should be able to read them

- since you're a robot. - [scribbling on paper]

Go on.

[chomping] Mmm, data.

Well, that guy sure likes 'em.

- [punch card holder rattles] - Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum.

I love it here.

[groans softly] Ugh.

We're gonna leave.

[Secret Queen] Oh. Erase your memory

on the way out.

[Jake] I wish we could.

- [cutlery clatters] - Lunch break.

- [door rumbling] - [mystical music playing]

[sandwiches] Yay!

[closing theme song playing]

♪ Come along with me ♪

♪ And the butterflies And bees ♪

♪ We can wander Through the forest ♪

♪ And do so as we please ♪