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("Silent Night" bell music)

(clock ticking)

(screaming)

- Why you smashing all the boys over here? What's going on?

- They're rude, mean and they're not my best friends.

- Well, when I was your age, I used to think

all the girls in my life were rude, mean

and didn't wanna be my friend.

But, then I grew up.

I always loved that picture of you two.

- My Christmas wish is that she will come back.

- She was taken from us too soon.

- [Narrator] For years, keeping her safe

meant keeping her awake.

- Do you want a snack or something?

- How about bed, David?

- David? My name is Dad.

Dad.

We gotta find a ball to replace it,

bring him right back to life.

Let's find him, let's find him.

Somewhere, you got it.

- [Narrator] This year, fear comes down the chimney.

- I asked Santa again in my letter.

- I told you not to ask him for anything, all right?

Don't ask him for those things.

Ask him, you're just gonna end up disappointed.

- Is Santa even real?

- Oh yeah.

(banging on window)

- [Narrator] The sins of the father

will be visiting her home this Christmas.

- [Girl] We go through this every year,

and I'm really sleepy.

(dramatic music)

Dear Santa.

(dramatic music)

- [Narrator] Naughty or nice,

writing Santa comes with a price.

(dramatic music)

- [Carl] What's on 13?

- Light those fires, snuggle up under a warm blanket,

and prepare yourselves for the most

frigid night of the year.

That's right, Jack Frost is nipping at our noses,

which can only mean that our viewers

hoping for a warm outcome can expect nothing less

than dark and icy just desserts.

In other news, it has been nearly a decade

since the mass murder spree that rocked our little tow--

(dramatic music)

- This is the latest in a slew of killings

and disappearances that have rocked this small town

of Owensboro, leaving the police baffled

as to the lack of clues and sheer

sadistic nature of these murders.

- The streets run red as yet again another murder

socks the residents of this once sleepy town.

The question on everyone's mind is,

who will survive and who will die trying?

(dramatic music)

- Local religious leaders have publicly commented

about the rise in holiday slayings,

but were met with criticism as one local man stated,

it is from the Bible that man has learned

cruelty and murder, for the belief

of a cruel God makes a cruel man.

(dramatic music)

- A note was left for police today at the scene

of the crime, wrapped in human flesh and stating,

We've all got the power in our hands to kill,

but most people are afraid to use it.

The ones who aren't afraid control life itself.

(dramatic music)

- It's been speculated that the recent disappearances

are part of an underground human trafficking ring

that has eluded the police for the past decade.

More on this as the mystery unravels.

(dramatic music)

- Local police are still not giving any details

regarding the newest in a barrage of unsolved murders,

putting City Hall on edge as they contemplate canceling

all Christmas celebrations across the tri-state area.

(dramatic music)

- Another innocent victim slain and a family in peril

this Christmas as the bloodshed continues.

Police and FBI are hard-pressed to give answers

as the body county rises and the list

of disappearances grows each day.

(dramatic music)

- More names have been added to the list

of missing persons this holiday season.

As we count down the days till Christmas,

the residents of Owensboro, Kentucky, can't help

but wonder, will Saint Nick be giving them gifts

or taking their lives?

- With Christmas right around the corner,

locals are curious if the madness will end.

When will someone bring closure

to the killings or disappearances,

or will they continue to ask themselves, Am I next?

(dramatic music)

- [Bartender] How about something with a little more cheer?

- Colder than the hinges of hell out there.

Better in here than lying in some shallow grave somewhere.

♪ Words don't mean a goddam thing to me ♪

Just saying it's the kind of cold

that gives a body the flesh creeps.

- This is some Grade A bullshit.

Are we seriously gonna sit around here

and ignore the obvious?

- All right, spill it, Boone.

I'm just dying to hear some juicy backwoods talk.

- Oh, I got something juicy for you all.

- You know, you keep flapping that cock holster,

and you're gonna wind up with a lot of unwanted evidence.

- Why don't you suck my candy cane?

- Santa!

- Merry Christmas, pump trumpets.

- Do you guys never talk about anything but dicks?

- Titties?

- Ask and you shall receive.

- Carl, before Satan Claus breezed in here,

you were making some kind of a point?

- I was just saying that Christmas is a sham.

- Oh Christ, not this again.

- The decline in values is undeniable.

Family and togetherness is now just drinking yourself

to death in some shithole dive bar.

No offense.

- None taken, as long as you pay your tab.

- I couldn't disagree with you more.

My family bond's ironclad, especially this time of year.

- [Carl] And you're here with us

instead of your family, why again?

- Still on the clock.

- It's all perspective.

- Says the man who serves the giant

imaginary friend in the sky.

- My point has nothing to do with beliefs.

It has to do with facts.

- I only speak the truth.

- The truth doesn't always stay buried, though.

- What a cunt.

Sorry, some people just suck the fucking flavor out of me.

- I guess what we're really talking

about is saving Christmas.

- Oh, like Earnest?

- Ben talked about tradition. Why don't we start there?

- Good idea.

I suggest we dig up some old ghosts.

- This time of year, when I was very young,

my great-grandmother would sit us all around

a roaring fire and scare the pants off us

with creepy stories.

She used to say,

Nothing satisfies us on Christmas Eve but to hear each other

tell authentic anecdotes about specters.

It is a genial, festive season, and we love to fill

our brains with dead bodies and murders and blood.

- Your grandma sounds like one spooky old bitch.

Scary stories on Christmas Eve?

What makes you think those are gonna make a comeback?

- Trust me, I know a thing or two about Resurrection.

- I love that idea.

I say we each take turns telling two stories.

Whoever tells the worst one picks up the tab.

Specifically my tab.

- Well I hope it aint me because I'm broke as shit.

- [Bartender] He aint lying.

I water down his drinks so I only have to change him half.

- I don't believe in ghosts.

Something doesn't add up and you wanna, what,

sit around and play kids games?

- [Carl] What are you going on about?

- [Ben] The email.

- I thought I told you to zip it.

- [Tobe] A few stories, and then we'll talk.

- In private.

- Oh come on, you guys.

Come on, this secrecy is killing me here.

- Get in line.

- [Carl] Father, why don't you go first?

- Look, I do wanna see you,

but that's not the best idea right now.

- Come on, you have barely left your house since Mom died.

This way, we can get some quality time together,

and, you know, decorate her house

one last time before we sell it.

We can even have Christmas here instead of at Uncle Riggs'.

Mom would have loved that.

- Just with everything that happened to her in that house,

how, how she gave into her demons.

I don't know that I can do that right now.

- Come on.

Please, do it for me.

It would mean a lot, and I've already cleaned

most of the house.

All I need you to do is just come and decorate.

- Yeah, I guess I can.

When do you want me there?

- How about Friday at two?

- I can do that.

- Okay.

And, Sam, try to be on time, for me, please?

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

- Sorry I'm late.

Just, couldn't get into motion today.

Danni?

Danni?

- It's okay. I'm just glad you're here.

- Well, I'm glad to be here too.

And it will be nice to decorate this place one last time.

I just can't imagine anyone else actually living here.

- Well then, let's get to it, and decorate.

- Okay.

(clock ticking)

(bells ringing)

Mom's old wreath.

(mysterious music)

- I don't think we should set things

close to the window like that.

- That's where Mom always put them.

- Maybe we should get things out of the basement.

- Sure.

I can get the tree and lights, if you wanna get

the extension, cable and power strips.

- As long as you get things out of the basement.

- Okay.

(mysterious music)

(door creaking)

What the hell?

(gasping)

(hard breathing)

- [Danni] Sam?

Sam?

- Danni?

(suspenseful music)

(door creaking)

(mysterious music)

- Sammy?

(suspenseful music)

(screaming)

What's the matter, Sam?

Don't you wanna stay here with me?

- This can't be real.

- This is real, and I want you to stay here with me.

We can be together forever, like a family.

- You're not Danni.

- I couldn't resist. She gave in real easy.

Even Danni tried to fight me, but I got her too.

Join me, and you can be with them forever.

(dramatic music)

I see you're thinking about it. Just do it.

(dramatic music)

(groaning)

(dramatic music)

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

- Hello, would you have any interesting in donating

to our holiday mental health drive?

Are you okay?

- No.

- [Worker] Do you need help?

- Yeah.

Yeah, I need help.

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

- T-minus one hour to go, Dad.

- You're not gonna wake me up right at midnight, are you?

- Well that all depends.

Think I can fall asleep between now and then?

Plus, not only is it Christmas,

but I'll finally be a teenager.

- Oh my God, don't remind me.

You know, I'm still having a hard time processing

the fact that you're not seven anymore.

- I,

I really wish Mom was here.

I really miss her this time of year.

- Honey, you know she's always with us.

In fact, I bet she's watching over us right now.

- I know.

I know, it's just I feel like--

- Sweetie,

it's nobody's fault.

It's why they're called accidents.

- There shoulda been more done to save her.

I mean, like, why did it take them

so long to cut her from the car?

We were the ones thrown from it.

Why are we still alive,

and she's not?

(soft music)

- Hey, look at that.

We got less than an hour.

Come on, try to get some sleep.

- I suppose.

Hey, Daddy?

- Yeah.

- I love you.

- I love you too, Bug.

(cap rattling)

Ah.

- [Recording] Hello, my love.

I am so excited to be home tonight.

I feel terrible about how much I've been gone lately,

and I just, I can't even tell you

how excited I am to see you both.

I love you.

Bye.

(soft music)

(exhaling)

(soft music)

(phone vibrating)

(soft mysterious music)

- I don't know who the hell this is,

but this shit aint funny.

- [Stranger] You know who this is.

Or do I need to remind you?

(car crashing)

(people shouting)

- [Stranger] Kaytlin, Kaytlin!

Oh God, please, no! Please, please!

- No.

No no no no no no.

It's impossible.

- [Stranger] But it is.

You got your extra time with her. Now it's my time.

You knew this day was coming.

This was part of the deal you agreed to.

Steven.

- No, no.

Fuck you.

You're not taking her too.

Not her. I didn't bargain for shit.

- [Stranger] See, that's where you're wrong, Steven.

I could have taken her from you at any moment.

I'm a man of my word.

And now it's her time to join your wife, and me,

for all eternity (laughs maniacally).

(footsteps marching)

- Is it midnight yet, Dad?

- Almost, just a few more seconds.

(soft suspenseful music)

(hand squeezing)

(upbeat rock music)

- Well, those sent a shiver down my spine.

- Hell, I thought your spine didn't work.

- You're an asshole.

- [Tobe] Who's up next?

- Oh, I've got a story I can tell.

- I'll go next.

♪ Gonna do what you wanna do ♪

(upbeat music)

- You know, it just doesn't really feel

like Christmas this year, bro.

I mean, with no one around to celebrate it, it's just ...

- Look, man, I know.

It sucks, but, it was inevitable.

It was a miracle that we were all together

for as long as we were, you know, in the same place.

And I'm going to miss being home as much as the next guy,

but it was time.

You know what, to be completely honest,

I think we work better as a duo anyway.

- Yeah.

- I mean, we were always on the same page

artistically and creatively.

The other guys, they just ...

I don't know. They wanted to play it safe.

I just really think that it started to hinder our art.

- Speaking of home.

- Oh, fuck, this has some weight on it.

- Yeah, dude, open it.

- No fucking way, bro, are you for real?

- A little taste of home for you, brother.

- Oh shit, is this apple pie?

- Of course it's apple pie.

- Oh, fuck yes, man, thank you.

- Yeah, man.

- God, man, the worst part about living in this city, man,

is the lack of a moonshine place.

- Oh, tell me about it.

- You know what?

Since you gave me my present,

I think it's only fair that I return the favor.

- Of course.

Woo hoo, now, what could this be?

- Take a look.

- Dude, dude, hell yes.

- Yep, yep.

I mean, I knew you needed a new one, so.

- I really don't know what coulda happened to my other one.

- Well I have told you 1001 times,

it fell outta the tree stand.

- No. All right, there's no way, okay?

I woulda heard it hit the ground.

- Yeah, but, bro, hunting knives

don't just completely disappear.

- This is pretty cool, though.

- Yeah, I know man. It's one of a kind, too.

Handcrafted, this guy in the mountains,

I got him to make it for me.

- Yeah, I wanna test this out for sure.

- Yeah.

What the fuck?

- Look, I know that one gift each is kind of our tradition,

but, I don't know, this was just something

that I felt inclined to give you.

- What's this?

- All right, so I have been feeling a little homesick

this year, so when I was digging through all

my old photos, it just felt really, dirty

to keep them in a box in the closet.

So, I made a scrapbook, all right.

And I guess the whole reason was that I just,

I wanted to,

I guess the purpose was I just wanted to see

like, where we were when we started to where we are now.

And they're all in chronological order.

All right, so we can trace how far we have come.

- Yeah, bro, oh my God.

There's Madison, Cody.

Yo, I don't even think I've seem most of these.

This is awesome.

- Yeah, man, the good old days.

Yeah but hey, we made some good art together back then.

(soft suspenseful music)

- Actually, you know what?

You're not the only one who got a second gift.

- What is it?

- It's a surprise. Come on, follow me.

(soft suspenseful music)

- Oh ho ho ho, ho ho.

- You ready to break in that knife of yours?

- Oh yo, get your camera ready.

(laughing)

- Merry Christmas, buddy.

(soft suspenseful music)

("Silent Night" piano music)

- Perfect.

("Silent Night" piano music)

Hello.

- Hello, Charlie.

- Who the hell are you?

- A friend, Charlie.

A friend.

- What the shit, ass face?

You can't just come into people's apartment.

- You look a little indisposed right now, Charlie,

little tied up at the moment.

- How do you know my name? Are you stalking me?

- The only stocking here right now

is just tied around your neck.

- That's funny.

You won't be laughing long.

- I'm here to help you, Charlie.

I'm here to give you the help you need.

- The help? Amber and Ted send you?

- No. No, a much higher power sent me.

I watch over you.

(bottle thudding)

- Like a guardian angel?

- (laughs) Well it's something like that.

I've come to show you some things, to help.

- Where are your wings then?

- Oh, I don't have any wings, Charlie.

- Yeah, you look like the kind of angel I'd have.

Fallen angel.

- Now you're getting it.

- Are you high, dude?

If you're my guardian angel,

where have you been my whole life?

- I show up only when you need my help.

- You keep saying that you're gonna help me.

How?

- It's easier to show you rather than tell you, Charlie.

I can show you things,

the past, the present.

The future.

- You've been watching too many Christmas movies, man.

Or I finally snapped.

(upbeat music)

How did you?

What?

Is that real? Is this real?

- Oh, it's real.

- Why did you show me that?

- We aren't done.

- What do you think the fallout from this is gonna be?

- Maybe we should have just stopped by or something

so he could have seen the kids.

I just don't wanna hurt him at his lowest point.

- He can't be around the kids, babe.

He's too volatile, and we both know it's getting worse.

- I know, I know.

It's just, it's hard.

I'm always going to care about him,

and I just want him to get help.

- You can't make someone get help.

This is just gonna help him realize it on his own.

And you can't keep enabling him.

Jane and Carter are just better off

not seeing him right now.

If he comes back at you over this, you can't respond.

- I can't just ignore him.

- Yes, you can, and you need to, Am.

- I don't think I can.

I'm always going to care about him.

- That supposed to give me hope?

That she still cares about me?

(dramatic music)

- You see, Charlie?

You did have the right idea.

You do need to do this for everyone's sake.

The world is a much better place without you.

(chair crashing)

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

(phone dinging)

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

(upbeat music)

- Those made my blood run cold.

- What do you know about running?

- I don't know why I hang out with you guys.

- This just in, the bodies of Almeda Chenault

and Alicia Gillis were discovered tonight in Davis County.

This follows the recent disappearance

of several other teenage girls,

all linked to a possible human trafficking syndicate.

- [Bartender] So much for the happiest time of the year.

- Well let me help take your mind off all that.

I've got a couple of terrifying tales,

stories so scary they'll make Carl's legs

get up and run away.

- You're an idiot, Tobe.

- [Toby] So horrifying, shit'll blow right outta your ass.

- Come on, Toby, really?

- Mm-hm.

Okay, so my first yuletide tale of terror--

- Goddammit, Toby, just tell your story.

- All right, all right.

As I was saying, it was Christmas Eve just like tonight.

(soft suspenseful music)

(window opening)

- Didn't your granny ever tell you the most dangerous thing

you can do on Christmas is to fuck over Santa?

- Really, I don't think Santa Claus'd be out

getting drunk on Christmas Eve like this guy.

- That's what we should be doing, man, getting drunk.

Watching Christmas movies.

What's so important about robbing this guy?

I mean, how much money can a mall Santa make?

What's he got here?

- He's not even mall Santa material.

I reckon there's not much of anything worth here.

I mean, there are some presents under that tree in there.

- Then what the hell are we doing here?

I told you, I wanna be done with this shit.

Wait, was that a kid?

Because I aint robbing presents from no kid.

- The kid won't miss them.

- Why's that?

- Because she's dead.

Yeah, her and the mom died in a drunk driving

accident last Christmas.

- I knew it.

I knew you were hiding something.

You been acting weird all day, man.

This doesn't feel right. Come on, let's go.

- You owe me a debt, huh?

Seven large?

Now do I need to break this other fucking arm?

- Man, a present from his kid.

Probably couldn't bring himself to open it,

the poor bastard.

I mean, why does it have to be this guy?

Why can't we cut this guy a break, man?

Why's it gotta be him?

- Freddy.

You're not freaking out on me again, are you, hm?

But there's something I wanna tell you.

The driver that killed this family, it was me.

And I, I tried to help them.

Okay, but as soon as I saw the cop lights and ...

I had to run.

The news said that he was in shock

so he couldn't give a description of the other driver.

It's Christmastime, man,

and it's really been keeping me up nights.

- Good, you should feel guilty!

- No, Freddy, I'm worried he's suddenly

gonna remember me, okay?

And as soon as he gives my description down at the station

then it's only a matter of time before they pick me up.

- Then what the hell are we doing here?

What if he spots you and just remembers

who you are and what you did?

- That's why we're here, Freddy.

We're here to finish the job.

As soon as Santa Claus gets home, we're gonna kill him.

(bells ringing)

(sighing)

(jingling)

(choking)

(dish breaking)

(bones crunching)

- All right, let's take advantage of the situation, huh?

I'll see what's under the tree.

And then, before we leave, we'll string him up,

make it look like a suicide.

- On Christmas?

- It's Christmas Eve.

(clock tolling)

- Not anymore.

(clock tolling)

(soft dramatic music)

(upbeat dramatic music)

(screaming)

(upbeat dramatic music)

- I'm coming, Robbie (screams)!

(screaming)

(groaning)

(upbeat dramatic music)

Robbie, help me!

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Ow!

Why the fuck couldn't this man be Jewish?

(upbeat dramatic music)

(screaming)

(upbeat dramatic music)

(blade striking)

(body thudding)

(soft bell music)

(soft suspenseful music)

(gunfire in video game)

- Kolton, I said game off.

- After this game, okay?

Where do you guys wanna drop, something new?

(gunfire in game)

- Kolton, I told you game off. That's final.

- Come on, Dad, let me just use this last gun

and I'll go to bed.

- No, sorry, pal. Game over.

- Dad, are you serious? There was only one guy left.

- I've already told you.

No more of this Fun Night, Family,

whatever you call this game.

- But, Dad.

- No, besides it's Christmas Eve.

Santa does not bring presents to kids

who disobey their parents, you know that.

- But he's already on his way.

There's no way he's gonna take my presents back.

- That's not entirely true.

- How not?

- Well, there's Kringles the Christmas Clown.

He watches kids when Santa can't.

- I've never even heard of him.

- Well, that's because not many people have.

Trust me, he is not someone you want to meet, Son.

- Dad, are you serious?

- Oh yeah.

See, Kringles is Santa's number one helper.

Now Christmas Eve's a crazy time,

so Santa can't watch all the kids all the time,

so he sends Kringles out ahead of his sleigh.

If the kids are being good, Santa shows up,

does his thing, all is merry and bright.

But if they're bad,

well,

Kringles kills the parents and then takes the children

to the North Pole to work in Santa's workshop,

making the toys they never received.

- Are you serious?

- Yeah.

I'm your dad, when have I ever lied to you?

Now come on, get into bed.

Night.

(door closing)

(soft suspenseful music)

- Don't you know what happens to bad little boys

on Christmas Eve?

(laughing maniacally)

(whimpering)

- What did I tell you about playing games tonight?

- Hey, did you see that clown?

- What clown?

- Dad, Kringles the Christmas Clown!

- That was a story I told you to go to sleep.

- But, Dad, I saw him.

- And I see it had the opposite effect.

- But, Dad.

- No, but, just look.

Just don't tell your mother I told you that story, okay.

She hates that story.

We used to hear that story when we were kids, all right.

Just go to sleep.

(clown laughing)

(soft suspenseful music)

- Dad, don't pick it up.

(soft suspenseful music)

- Where'd this come from?

- Tis the season.

Who wants cotton candy?

(muffled screaming)

- Let my dad go.

- No, you were right. Pink is not a Christmas color.

Needs a little red in there.

- No, please, no, stop it!

(knife slicing)

(upbeat dramatic music)

- I came for my Christmas present.

- No, please, I'll be good, please, no!

No, please.

- Oh, it's too late for that, Kolton.

(slow music)

- Well I guess we know who's picking up

the tab and leaving the tip.

- Yeah, I'll be giving your mom the tip.

- My mom's dead.

- Guess I won't have to worry about her

turning me down then.

- Oh, too far.

- I'm sure he was only kidding.

You were kidding, right?

- Yeah, of course.

Just spreading around a little Christmas joy.

- By joking about my dead fucking mom?

- [Tobe] Who fucked your dead mom?

- Come on, guys, let's not fight.

Carl, wanna go next?

- I'd love to.

(soft suspenseful music)

(upbeat holiday music)

- [Parker Voiceover] Dear Santa, I know I haven't been

perfect this year, but I've tried very hard to be good

and there is only one thing I want

for Christmas, a cellphone.

I think I am old enough now to have one,

and hopefully you think I have been good enough too.

Merry Christmas. Love, Parker.

(screaming)

- Oh my God, oh my God, watch out.

Watch out, it's gonna eat you.

Oh my God, oh my God.

- Stop, get it away from me!

- Get her.

- Stop.

Shut up.

- Look at this thing.

It couldn't harm a fly. Look at it.

You are so stupid.

- No, you're stupid.

- You're acting like there's an anaconda in this room.

It's just a little lizard.

- If you keep doing this, Santa Claus isn't gonna

bring you any presents for Christmas.

- No duh! Santa isn't real!

- Yes he is!

- Newsflash, it's the parents that put

the gifts under the tree.

- No, shut up!

- Where's the proof? Where's the proof that Santa is real?

- You'll see when he gets the letter that I wrote.

- Oh my God, dude, is that it right there?

That's the one? Okay, how about we take a look.

Dear Santa, I know I haven't been perfect this year.

Not even close.

- Dad!

- You know what, no. You're right, you're right.

I'm sorry. I was being a jerk.

Santa is real. You know what, yeah.

I'm sorry. I'm ...

I should be good so he'll give me presents,

but you know, along with Santa,

he also has an evil twin brother.

- No he doesn't.

- An evil twin brother so bad, when God was creating

Santa Claus, He used up all the good and put it into Santa.

So all that was left for Santa's brother was evil.

In fact, so evil that they even had to banish him to hell.

- That's not true!

- And now they say the only way you can get him

outta there is by playing a Christmas song backwards.

- You're lying.

- What is that I hear?

I think it's a Christmas song.

- Stop, don't do it.

(needle scratching)

(muffled music)

- Have you really been nice this year, Parker?

- Dad!

- I think you've been naughty.

- No, stop it!

- You wanted a cellphone, right, cellphone?

- Knock it off.

- That aint gonna happen. More like a piece of coal.

- You can stop it, it's not funny. Stop!

- I think you've been naughty.

You know what they say about Santa's brother.

He kills the naughty ones.

- Please stop, you're scaring me!

- And they say, that when you summon him, he won't leave

until he's killed every naughty child in the entire world.

Have you been naughty, Parker?

Have you been naughty this year?

I think you have. I think he's gonna kill you, Parker.

Have you been naughty?

(dramatic music)

Holy shit.

(dramatic music)

- I've been good, I've been good, I've been good.

I've been good.

- [Brother] No, please. Please, I swear I've been good.

(flesh squishing)

- I've been good, I've been good, I've been good.

(upbeat holiday music)

(gasping)

(upbeat holiday music)

Ooh.

A phone!

Aubrey, guess what. I got a phone!

I got it from Santa Claus. He just left it on my bed.

He's the coolest.

Yeah, of course I did.

Yep.

Have you seen the one with the dog in the tutu

on that ballerina floor?

Aw, that was the best.

Of course I saw the one with the cat in the bubble bath.

(speaking indistinctly)

(dramatic holiday music)

(gentle piano music)

- [Maggie] I'm home.

- [Laurie] In here, sweetie.

- Whoa. You wasted no time.

I guess you only have several days until Thanksgiving.

- I have to work a double the next two days.

That way I get Wednesday off

and I can get a head start on cooking.

- Well, I can help you with the cooking.

I can always stuff your turkey while you're cooking.

- Very funny.

Look, you know our families are coming, and I thought it

would be more festive than some stupid cornucopia.

Is that a crime?

- What is that?

- O-kay, you're gonna need to be

a little more specific than that.

- The doll, Laurie, where the hell did you find that?

- Oh, it was in a tied up box in the attic.

I found it while I was rummaging for decorations.

The box had your name on it,

and I thought the elf was kinda cute.

I couldn't find the wooden cross that controls it, though.

- It never had one.

My grandfather gave me that creepy thing when I was a kid.

It haunted me, every night.

It's possessed, Laurie.

My parents just called them night terrors.

I went to therapy for several years to try

to get past this, and, well.

- You've never told me any of this.

- I just never wanted to think about it again.

Can you please get rid of it?

- It's just a stupid doll.

I think your nieces and nephews'll love it.

- No. A stupid doll.

No, you need to get rid of it.

If you don't get rid of it, I'm getting rid of it.

- How about we go upstairs

and I give you a little gobble gobble?

And maybe we can practice stuffing that turkey.

It'll take your mind off of this.

I've never seen you like this before.

- You're not gonna believe me if I tell you.

No one ever believed me.

(suspenseful music)

Just get rid of it, for both of our sakes.

(suspenseful music)

(banging in another room)

- Laurie, wake up.

- What?

- Listen.

- No. Listen to me sleep.

(banging)

(gasping)

No, no, no.

This is not happening. This is not real.

It's just a dream.

It's not real. This is not real.

Fuck this.

(suspenseful music)

- What are you doing?

- It's nothing, just go back to sleep.

- What do you mean it's nothing?

Whatever.

(suspenseful music)

- This is not happening, this is not happening,

this is not happening.

(floorboards banging)

- What is wrong with you?

I need to get some sleep.

Are you kidding me with this shit?

(soft suspenseful music)

(choking)

(screaming)

(neck breaking)

- Unit 52 to Dispatch. Arrived on scene.

- [Dispatch] 10-four, Unit 52.

(officer sighing)

- Probably another bullshit call.

(knocking on door)

Owensboro Police Department.

We got a call about a noise disturbance.

Unit 52 to Dispatch.

We got no response at this residence.

Go ahead and get me another unit

en route to this location please.

- [Dispatch] 10-four, 52.

- Man you got here quick.

- Jesus!

Yeah I did.

Got a peeping Tom and a disturbance call on the same street.

But you need to go on home for your own safety.

I've gotta check on this disturbance call.

- Well, I thought you could use these keys.

They gave them to me to watch their fish

and take in their mail while they're on vacation.

- Thank you very much, sir.

Now go on home for your own safety.

- Okay, I'll go check on the rest of the street.

(whimpering)

(soft suspenseful music)

(screaming)

(whimpering)

(dramatic crescendo)

(screaming)

- Police officer in the house!

Everybody okay?

- [Laurie] Up here!

- Holy sheep shit! What the fuck is going on here?

All right, ma'am. Ma'am, I'm here to help you.

Ma'am, I'm here to help you. I'm here to help you.

I'm here to help you.

Okay, okay, okay. What's going on?

- I thought she was just overreacting.

I didn't listen to her, and now she's dead.

He was freaking alive!

- What are you talking about? What's alive?

- The elf killed her.

- Oh, okay. Okay, ma'am, okay, ma'am, calm down.

Okay.

No, this is for your protection and for mine, okay?

- No, no no no no. It wasn't me.

I swear, the elf killed her!

- Yes, ma'am.

- Please, you have to believe me.

I know it sounds crazy, but it's true.

- No, ma'am, that doesn't sound crazy at all.

(struggling)

- Officer, did you see that?

- Yes, ma'am, I see it.

- No.

Stop, look!

(suspenseful music)

♪ Open your ears and close your eyes ♪

♪ The time has come for you ♪

- You are one morbid SOB.

- Thanks.

You know, ever since I lost the use of my legs,

I've been doing a lot more writing.

- All right, I've been sitting here listening

to you dumb-asses tell stories all night.

It's my turn.

- Considering your profession,

I'm sure you have tons of horror stories.

- Kinda feels like I'm living one tonight.

- That felt a bit foreshadowy.

- Guess you guys are rubbing off on me.

You know, going back and forth all night long

about some deep, dark secret you're hiding.

I guess innocent till proven guilty, right?

- What the hell is that supposed to mean?

- I don't think she meant anything.

Why are you acting so suspicious?

- Lighten up, sweetheart.

Relax.

Because I'm about to creep you the fuck out.

- The prison transfer of Levi Thorn ended in tragedy

when the infamous serial murderer escaped custody.

What followed in his wake was a string of brutal slayings.

A manhunt was underway.

But despite the best efforts of the Davies County

Sheriff's Department and state police,

what followed was the murder of 23 people

in what locals have called a Christmas to dismember.

(dramatic pulsing music)

(groaning)

- I need you to hang on, okay?

Help's on the way.

The person who did this, can you tell me where they went?

(stuttering)

Christ.

(dramatic pulsing music)

Fuck!

(dramatic music)

Sheriff's Department.

Put your hands where I can see them and come out slowly!

(dramatic pulsing music)

(groaning)

(dramatic pulsing music)

Pull it together.

(dramatic pulsing music)

(coyote howling)

Work on Christmas. We'll get together, have a few laughs.

(dramatic pulsing music)

Deputy Harmon, if that's you, identify yourself.

(dramatic pulsing music)

(gun firing three times)

(dramatic music)

(gasping)

(sobbing)

Dispatch, this is Logan 15, I have a deputy down.

Repeat, deputy down!

Our location's eight miles west of Connor Lake

on Old Carpenter Road, do you copy?

Dispatch, Sheriff Kalpano, do you copy?

Goddammit!

(sobbing)

(soft suspenseful music)

The games are over!

The entire state of Kentucky is looking for you.

There's nowhere to run or hide.

Show me that pretty little face of yours

and I'll cure all your ills.

(soft suspenseful music)

(siren blaring)

(soft suspenseful music)

Fuck this.

(gun cocking)

(soft suspenseful music)

(knocking on window)

- Hey, Psycho.

Smile, asshole.

You're not my trainee. Where's Mark?

- What are you doing?

- It's the one-year anniversary, man. Check it out.

- One year ago today, Levi Thorn went on a holiday

killing spree that made "Silent Night Deadly Night"

look like a kids movie.

Joining me in the studios today is world-renowned

psychiatrist and bestselling author

of "The Christmas Eve Murders," Dr. Zane Hershberger.

Now, Levi was a patient of yours.

Can you give us any insight into why

he'd commit such atrocities?

- Well to understand the mind of the sociopathic killer,

you must first realize that all basic

human logic must be put aside.

Mr. Thorn is a truly troubled man,

a man who doesn't know the difference

between right or wrong.

He's not a vessel for pure evil or a shark on the hunt.

Rather a man whose internalized switch is reversed.

Where the average person gets pleasure from violent

video games or violent movies, Mr. Thorn gets pleasure

from experiencing the violence firsthand.

- Holy shit, it's the guy.

- Christ, you really are brand new.

This picture is gonna get me so many likes

you don't even know, hashtag pussy magnet.

Woo (laughs).

- What the hell's he doing?

- He's living in his head right now.

The sick fuck did a number on a couple

of sheriffs and two prison guards.

(groaning)

(screaming)

(crying)

(dramatic music)

- You don't say?

- That aint even the most fucked up part.

An elementary school field trip

got lost on the same road that night.

Wrong place, definitely the wrong time.

He sliced and diced an entire class.

The body count went from four to almost 30 like that.

Apparently, the families of the kids tried

to get him tried and put to death.

Ironically, he was unfit to stand trial.

He's been here ever since.

There's been a couple of failed attempts on his life, but

there he stands, healthy and happy as a pig in shit,

just reliving that night over and over again.

Sometimes, he's a cop. Sometimes, he's one of the guards.

A spectator in his own jacked up mind.

- You know, you almost seem excited

to be sharing a space with this piece of garbage.

- Who wouldn't be?

He's practically a celebrity.

He's like a real-life Jason Myers or something.

- First of all, it's Michael. It's Michael Myers.

And I don't recall him killing

an entire school bus full of children,

changing the course of everyone's lives.

Do you know that some of the parents were

so grief-stricken they committed suicide?

I bet you didn't see that on the news.

(dramatic music)

- Show me that pretty little face,

and I'll cure all your ills.

- I love this job.

- My kid brother was on that bus.

- Say what?

(gun firing)

(glass breaking)

- If you like that, you're gonna love this.

(gun firing)

- Ho ho, holy fuck!

- You're listening to the Midnight Hour

with Dean Castle on this blustery Christmas Eve,

where the night is cold but the calls are hot.

Caller, you're on the mic. Thrill me.

- [Caller] Happy birthday, Dean. I'm a longtime fan.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, and first-time caller.

Feed me something new, teabagger.

Caller, I hope what you've got is tastier

than this shit coffee, Christ.

- [Caller] Need some sugar for that, sweetheart?

- Damn, you sound slutty as hell.

- [Caller] Because I am.

- You'll have to forgive my toxic masculinity,

but with a sexy voice like that, I could eat that butt.

- [Caller] Try eating this.

A little birdie told me you're being replaced.

- Replaced? Woman, please.

I'm the hottest young rising talent on the air.

- [Caller] You're the worst thing

since an all-female "Ghostbusters" reboot.

- What the hell are you talking about?

Who the fuck is this?

(caller laughing)

(laughing)

- Do you think he bought it?

- You were perfect.

- I gotta go powder away this swamp ass,

so listen to this.

No rando's replacing me, you dumpster fire.

(banging)

(laughing)

- You shoulda seen your face.

- You should see my shorts. They're caked in shit.

Probably the closest thing I'll get to cake all day.

- Since when did you become Bruce Lee?

- When I get scared, I become a black belt.

- How's that?

- My ancestors were black.

- You've covered misogyny and racism tonight.

Are you gonna top it off with the douche bag trifecta

by calling me a tard?

- You know I don't like the R word.

- Thank God you have one redeeming quality.

- Your mom says I have several (laughs).

- I just wanted to stop by and wish you a happy birthday.

- Bah humbug.

- Are you okay? Other than being a year older, I mean.

- I'm always okay.

It's just that some thunder cunt repeated that

apparent rumor, and it pissed me the fuck off.

- Was this because the new guy took your late-night spot?

- What the fuck?

They are not moving me to that morning slot.

I swear to God, I'll quit before I'm reduced to playing

top 40 hits to muffin top moms

driving their plebes to school.

- Well, I think you'll give great farm reports.

- Get the fuck outta here.

How's it hanging, late nighters?

All right, you know the drill. It's 11:30.

Time for another hourlong commercial-free uninterrupted

music brought to you by Farmer Vince's meat pies.

Since 1980, Farmer Vince has been making the tastiest,

meatiest pies and fritters this side of Davis County.

Remember, it takes a whole lotta heat

to cook Farmer Vince's meat.

♪ I'm making it better ♪

♪ Bright colors, snow in December ♪

♪ I'll take you and make your mom watch ♪

♪ Her son murder your brother ♪

♪ Your sister, your dad and your daughter ♪

(phone dialing)

(phone ringing)

- [Recording] Hello, you've reached Bob Clark.

Leave me a message and I'll get right back to you.

- Mr. Clark, I would appreciate it if you'd call me back.

I've been hearing some bullshit,

and I wanna know if there's any truth to it.

I'm the best thing that ever happened

to this media market, and you know it!

So, if you're even thinking about replacing me,

you'd better think twice, you're gonna regret it.

Call me back, Bob.

♪ I'm wasted ♪

(clock ticking)

(soft piano music)

(door opening and closing)

(soft piano music)

(banging in other room)

(soft suspenseful music)

This is the part where I yell who's there,

and nobody answers, right?

(soft suspenseful music)

You'd better be a ghost, because I swear, if anybody reaches

out and touches me, you're dead!

I swear, not a finger!

(soft suspenseful music)

(glass smashing)

Don't screw with me!

I've got significant pull around here!

I'm the Yeetus in this place!

I can skeet and yeet. I'm a master yeeter, do you hear me?

I bust ass and bust nuts!

All right, that was a shitty threat, but you get the idea.

I'm tired, and I'm pissed! That's a deadly combination!

(soft suspenseful music)

Fuck.

(soft suspenseful music)

(handle rattling)

(soft suspenseful music)

(handle rattling)

(soft suspenseful music)

(door creaking)

(soft suspenseful music)

Jesus!

- Dean, Dean Castle!

(shouting)

(laughing)

- Oh, they said you were a mean fucking son of a bitch,

but I just made you piss your pants like a baby.

- Fuck you, whatever your name is!

- Come on.

Don't be like that. You're gonna hurt my feelings.

- Your feelings are trivial.

- Okay, look, we don't gotta be friends.

I'm gonna get your spot either way.

- Like hell you are.

- It's already a done deal.

Mr. Clark was gonna tell you tomorrow,

but I figure today is a good day to break the news

to you considering it's your birthday.

(laughs) Master yeeter.

- You're treading on thin ice, dog dick.

- Oh, I've got something to show you.

- What?

- Your new office. It's smaller than your older one.

Come on.

(blow striking)

(dramatic music)

- Nobody takes me outta the running! You hear me?

Not the FCC!

Sure as shit not some new guy,

who doesn't even have the decency

to have a name I can fucking remember!

(dramatic music)

Wasn't quite the end of the week

you were expecting, huh, you dead fuck?

(laughing)

What was that, huh?

Oh, I'm sorry.

That was just the sound of your

brain shutting down (laughs).

You wanna know the best part, huh?

I'm gonna take this hammer, I'm gonna wipe it off

and put it your cold dead hands and say you attacked me.

(laughs) That's right, mud flap.

I'm getting away scot-free, and I'm keeping my night slot.

And I'm gonna find out who you were fucking,

and I'm getting all up in their guts (laughs).

Nothing short of an act of God

is gonna stop that from happening (laughs).

(horn blowing)

(upbeat rock music)

- Be right with you, hon.

- [Father] Whatever she's drinking is on me.

- [Stranger] That's kind of you, Father.

- Do unto others, as they say.

- My thoughts exactly.

- There's no way either story you just told

could possibly be real.

- Stick a needle in my eye.

- I'll stick a needle if you let me.

- Did you just admit to having a needle dick?

- Hey, speaking of sexual harassment,

I'd tongue punch her firebox.

Hi.

- Come here, cupcake.

- Okay.

- Hi. - Hi.

- Disrespect me again, and the only thing

around here that's gonna get punched is your throat.

- I'm sorry.

- Good talk.

(upbeat rock music)

- I'm in love.

- No chance in hell, man.

- I'm gonna have her baby.

- Let's keep things moving.

- Fuck me.

If our final destination hinges on my participation,

let's just get things over with.

("Joy to the World" piano music)

- You stupid-ass lights.

- You need help down there?

(mumbling)

What?

- Huh, what?

Oh, no, I'm good. I think I've almost got it.

- Okay.

- Love you.

Oh yes, thank God. Suck it, Christmas.

("Joy to the World" piano music)

See? Told you I'd fix it.

- You sure did.

And while you fixed that one light, I just went ahead

and decorated the rest of the tree.

But you're pretty.

- Whoa whoa whoa, no, you don't get to just walk away

and hit me in the chest like I'm some kinda bro.

That which you just witnessed in there,

that was an epic win in a battle that has been waging

between man and Christmas for decades.

- An epic battle?

- Yeah.

- Between man and Christmas?

- That's what I said.

- Okay.

- No, don't just okay me.

Not just any man can do what I did in there.

It takes skill and precision,

determination even, to accomplish what I just did.

- Oh, gee, I'm sorry, I didn't know. Precision, huh?

- Well you do now.

- I know. You say you did all that for me?

- Of course I did, babe.

- Oh.

I cannot believe I got you in that sweater.

- I look like a fucking tool.

- I know, but you're my tool.

(doorbell ringing)

Ooh, hey, go get the door.

- Fuck Christmas.

(soft piano music)

- Happy holidays!

- Happy holidays. Come on in, guys.

- [Hillary] I better go find Jess.

- Nice to see her too.

- She's drunk.

- Eh, there's a surprise.

How you doing, buddy?

- I'm doing, brother.

I see you spent all your money on these decorations

and only bought part of your pants.

- Well, I left my nice pants at your mom's house last night.

- I'll grab them for you the next time I'm there.

- Jess! - Oh my God!

- My favorite ever, so glad to see you.

- Oh my goodness.

You started the party a little early, huh? Without me.

- Well come on, let's go get you one.

- Okay.

Oh God.

They look beautiful.

Why don't we put it there?

(chattering)

- Yeah! The gang's all here, guys.

(doorbell ringing)

- I got it. No, I got it, I insist.

("Silent Night" instrumental music)

- [Hillary] So we had to go to the store.

We had to go to the store.

We went shopping.

- [Jess] Okay.

- And I found, I found these shoes.

We had to go to like seven different stores,

but it was fine because he was driving.

But look how, look how pretty this is.

Look at it, look at it on the inside.

- Oh, sweetheart.

- It's so pretty.

- It's even prettier on your foot. Let's put it on.

- Yeah, okay. - Sure.

(piano music)

- What the hell? Hello?

Hello?

(piano music)

Huh, what is this?

From the keeper of the bellz.

This dwelling has been marked by the blood of the bellz.

All who inhabit shall perish?

Ah, Jesus (laughs)!

- You're easy, man. What do you got?

- I don't know. I found it outside.

- This dwelling has been marked by the blood.

Well that's fucking dumb.

Nice sweatshirt, by the way. You look like a tool.

- Yeah, that's what I said.

(wind blowing)

(dramatic music)

- Tyler?

(dramatic music)

Tyler?

- Hey, give me help.

- Why's your shoe off?

- Hey, what's going on?

- This goddam.

(groaning)

(dramatic music)

- I am the keeper of the bellz.

And you shall all pay for your sins.

(bells clattering)

Go, my child. Make them pay.

(blow striking)

(groaning)

(soft dramatic music)

- Oh, shit.

(soft dramatic music)

(blows striking)

(gentle piano music)

- Whew.

- I told you we shoulda just followed the GPS.

- I did, and we're still late.

- That's only because you waited until we got in the car

to figure out how long it was gonna take us to get here.

- You do know that the GPS is a part of the car, right?

What the fuck?

- Oh my God, oh my God (screams)!

(blow striking)

("Hark the Herald Angels Sing" instrumental music)

♪ Hark the herald angels sing ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

♪ Glory to ♪

(knocking on door)

(woman screaming)

- [Ted] Hey, let us in!

- [Peter] Please, God, open the door!

- [Ted] Don't leave us out here, man, please!

(banging on door)

(soft suspenseful music)

- All right, all right.

Hold on.

(banging on door)

Hey, wait.

Hey, wait a ...

- Shut the door. Shut the fucking door, now.

- [Elf] Okay, okay.

- Come here. You're gonna be all right, buddy.

- We shouldn't have come out here, man. Not on Christmas.

It's bad luck.

- [Elf] There's no trespassing signs all over this property.

Just how'd you two get up here?

- Are you fucking stupid, old man?

- What?

- Now you're just deaf!

- Hey, come on.

- Shut up!

I hear one more peep outta you.

(footsteps creaking)

Who else is here?

- No one. Just me.

- You don't think?

- Watch him. Watch him.

- Where are you going?

- I said watch him.

- Your arm looks like it hurts.

- He said, shut up.

- What happened out there?

- I told him this was a bad idea.

We were caribou hunting.

They fetch a good price this time of year.

And with times being so rough, I just said sure.

He found this place that wasn't on any of our maps.

And when we were walking there,

that's where we saw

it.

And it was so huge.

And it looked sick.

I told him we should stay away from it.

But he never listens to me.

- Peter, you're a good boy.

- Wait, I never told you my name.

How do you know?

- You need to leave this place while you still can.

Theodore, he's always been a bad boy.

He's earned what's coming to him.

- Ted, let's go!

(suspenseful music)

(growling)

(suspenseful music)

(thudding)

(growling)

(suspenseful music)

(growling)

- Good girl, who's a good girl?

They can't all stay at the North Pole, Pete.

Every once in a while, a few bad apples are born,

and it's my job to take care of them.

(dramatic music)

Was that you up there?

You naughty thing.

(grimacing)

Pete, you're gonna get one last gift for Christmas.

Least I can do

is make sure you don't suffer.

(choking)

(dramatic music)

(gasping)

(dramatic music)

♪ Hark the herald angels sing ♪

♪ Glory to the newborn king ♪

Merry Christmas.

- [Carl] Bravo, Ben. Bravo.

- Okay, now can we go somewhere and talk about

the fucked up reason we're here tonight?

Can we stop pretending like everything's okay?

Because everything's not fucking okay.

- If you ask me, you've said about enough.

- Yeah, well no one did ask you, asshole.

In fact, you know, I find it so funny that you're

always acting like you're the leader

when you're barely a fucking cop.

Serve and protect, my ass.

You know what I know?

I know you're as guilty as the scum you take

off the streets, same as everybody here in this room.

- That's it!

- Hell no!

You assholes either talk this shit out,

or you get the fuck outta my bar!

- What's the matter, Red, don't wanna talk things out?

- [Father] What about you, Miss?

You got any blood-curdling stories to tell?

- You don't wanna hear my story.

- Come on, we're bringing back a hallowed tradition.

- Some things can't be brought back.

- Sounds like you've got at least one good story to tell.

So let us have it.

- My story starts out sounding like a bad joke.

But I promise you, it's not.

Priest walks into a bar, along with a high school teacher,

a cop, a Santa and a pediatrician.

They all harbor a secret.

A lot of secrets.

Ones they thought they'd buried.

But one secret wanted more than anything to be discovered.

To be known,

so it reached out

and told their secret.

And come one cold Christmas Eve,

there was something none of them counted on.

- What's that?

- They never counted on me.

(gentle piano music)

(dramatic music)

(upbeat rhythmic music)

She was just a kid!

- Who are you?

- Vengeance.

- Oh shit.

Fuck

♪ It's beautiful, with the snow on the ground ♪

♪ Mistletoe hanging on the door, all around ♪

(groaning)

♪ Lights are brighter, chestnuts roasting on the fire ♪

♪ And the sleigh bells jingle through the town ♪

(bones cracking)

- Walk it off.

♪ The missing piece that I need ♪

♪ To make Christmas seem complete ♪

♪ Is someone to spend it with ♪

Blue lives splatter.

- No!

(gurgling)

♪ So, Old Saint Nick, can you bring a gift? ♪

♪ Can you bring her home? ♪

♪ I don't wanna be alone for Christmas ♪

(face squeaking)

(body thudding)

- You. You brought us here.

This will never be finished,

Because of the one we work for,

the one you really want, he's untouchable.

There's only five of us here.

(upbeat music)

- [Stranger] Six, guess he wasn't so untouchable after all.

(screaming)

(upbeat music)

(glass smashing)

- This isn't how you want to end this.

(upbeat music)

- You're right.

(screaming)

♪ I don't wanna be alone for Christmas ♪

♪ It's the one thing I have on my wish list ♪

♪ Old Saint Nick, can you bring a gift? ♪

♪ Can you bring her home? ♪

♪ I don't wanna be alone for Christmas this year ♪

Watch this.

You'll know why.

(upbeat music)

Oh, I almost forgot.

Merry Christmas.

(upbeat music)

♪ Was the night before Christmas, house to myself ♪

♪ Up and down the block, there was nobody else ♪

♪ Aint nobody gathering around those Christmas trees ♪

♪ Just a few stray dogs, some candy canes and me ♪

♪ Well it was just past midnight, five sheets in ♪

♪ A box of Cracker Jacks and a bottle of gin ♪

♪ When I heard them big boots stomping above my head ♪

♪ I had to figure it out before I went to bed ♪

♪ Oh ho, who's that on the rooftop? ♪

♪ Who's that with the sleigh? ♪

♪ Who's that in the chimney? ♪

♪ Who's coming on Christmas Day? Yeah ♪

(upbeat clarinet music)

♪ Well then what to my wandering eyes did appear ♪

♪ The man in red with a case of beer ♪

♪ He said, hey, I heard you need some company ♪

♪ I said come in, man, come on and take a seat ♪

♪ Ho ho, who's that on the rooftop? ♪

♪ Who's that with the sleigh? ♪

♪ Who's that in the chimney? ♪

♪ Who's coming on Christmas Day? Yeah ♪

♪ If I told you it was Santa ♪

♪ I don't think you would believe ♪

♪ But who else would come a-calling Christmas Eve? ♪

♪ Ho ho, who's that on the rooftop? ♪

♪ Who's that with the sleigh? ♪

♪ Who's that? Santa Claus, he's coming on Christmas Day ♪

♪ Yeah, and I heard him exclaim as he drove outta sight ♪

♪ You wanna sing it will me? Here we go ♪

♪ Ho ho ho, ho ho ho, oh ♪

♪ Ho ho ho, ho ho ho, oh ♪

♪ Ho ho ho, ho ho ho, oh ♪

♪ Ho ho ho, ho ho ho, oh ♪

(upbeat dramatic music)