Original subtitles

Thank you all for attending the inaugural

Bi-weekly District Staff Mixer,

what we hope will be the first of many BDSMs.

As your liaison representative, I just want to remind you

that the spring food drive starts next week.

Let's not overdo it on the corn this year.

They expect me to get to two of these a month?

I'm busy enough running my school as it is.

Not to mention we're implementing

an hour of PSSA test prep every day.

I know what you mean.

The amount of work

I put into organizing a new book fair this year

has been so draining.

Well, Abbott had two new book fairs this year,

so I'm twice as drained.

We're also having our teachers coming in

at 7:15 instead of 7:00.

My teachers come in late all the time.

The extra sleep for the teachers

improves results for students.

Well, my teachers' start time is 7:16.

The extra minute gives them more pep in their step

for grading all that homework.

Your kids are still doing homework?

That's quaint.

You got rid of homework?

We rolled out a pilot program this year.

The studies are showing that no homework decreases burnout

and improves kids' home lives.

My kids are doing no school.

Yeah.

What?

They're doing school.

But also...

We are now a no-homework school.

And the school will be locked till 7:16!

What?

Yeah!

This is preposterous.

Homework is the backbone of academia.

I mean, what if Sir Isaac Newton didn't have homework?

Would we even have gravity?

Plus, it assists our youth in developing crucial skills

like time management and responsibility.

That's absolutely correct, Mr. Johnson.

And to piggyback off myself,

let me present a philosophical question.

If we take away homework, what would the dog eat?

Look, maybe this will be the big push

that we really needed.

You know, the kids have enough on their plates,

and the research shows that no homework

evens out the playing field.

Yeah, most kids use AI for homework now, anyway.

You know, I got an essay last week

about how Rosa Parks invented parks.

I teach math.

Look, I don't grade the homework,

but I do like to see that they did it.

You don't grade homework?

How do you know how they're doing?

I mean, I keep track of who needs help,

but there's no point in grading until the test.

Oh, okay. That-- That's shocking.

A little alarming, and proves

you learn something new every day.

Like, that's where a grade would come in, actually.

I've seen these fads come and go.

Silly social contracts.

Ergonomic chairs.

This too shall pass.

Homework has stood the test of time for a reason.

And those policies still exist today

in countries like China and North Korea.

Alright, see everyone tomorrow.

There's really no homework, Mr. C?

'Cause you usually give us like two hours' worth.

No, I-I promise there isn't.

But I do encourage you to think about

what we talked about today.

That's homework.

Sorry. Force of habit.

One more time.

Have-- H-A-V-E.

Have!

Great job!

Now, sight words can be a little tricky.

So, when you go home tonight,

I want you all to do--

nothing because we no longer have homework!

Yay!

Yes, I am sure without any practice at all,

you will all remember today's lesson,

no problem.

They won't remember a blessed thing.

This no-homework thing is feeling good.

Seems like we are really onto something here.

Oh, yeah. This is great.

I'm gonna use my free afternoons

to go home and watch some college hoops.

Look, I found this fun app

that lets you predict how many points

each team's gonna score,

and then, here's the kicker--

you get it right, they give you a little, like, prize money.

What's the catch?

No, there's no catch.

In fact, they give you 100 bucks just to sign up.

Mm, fun.

Well, now that I have my afternoons free,

I can beat the 5:00 p.m. bike traffic.

I usually get doored once a month.

Oh, yeah. Sorry about yesterday, man.

I didn't see you. Yeah.

So, let me get this straight.

You give them the homework, they take it home, they do it,

and then you...

Look at it and say, "Great job."

But for what? For doing it.

And then I give them a star. That is insane.

That'd be like if I-I, like, I... Alright, now.

Don't strain yourself. I got it.

Gregory Eddie!

Don't worry. I'm not here to beat your ass.

That's great. Why would you be?

Oh, don't you tempt me.

Go ahead, son. Go enjoy your day.

Did you know I'm not even Jabari's teacher anymore?

Oh, this is bigger than both of us.

See, Jabari tells me he doesn't have homework,

and I know he's not lying

because we watch "Power Book Raising Kanan."

They lie on that show all the time,

so he knows it's wrong.

What is going on?

Darnell, it is true. Okay?

There is no homework. It's a new school-wide mandate.

But doing homework together is how we bond, okay?

And there's already enough people

trying to tear Black fathers from their sons,

as we've seen on "Raising Kanan."

Maybe we can suggest, um, another way

for you guys to bond.

Maybe watching "Snowfall"?

Ms. Teagues, respectfully... Mm-hmm. Yes.

...that is a ridiculous suggestion. It is.

He already watched "Snowfall" when he was 2.

That's how he learned to speak. ...he learned to speak.

S-- Okay. Yeah.

That's on me, then.

Okay, so yesterday,

we saw how the Cold War was really starting to heat up.

Now, who can give me a quick hit

on how Sputnik ratcheted up tensions?

Who was Stud Nick?

Ah, wouldn't we like to know?

No. Come on. Sputnik. The satellite?

Come on, guys, you should have read about it in chapter 30--

which was supposed to be your homework.

Um, we can't skip Skutnip-- skip Sputnik.

Frick it! We'll do it live.

Everybody just open your books to chapter 31

and start reading.

So, to set the stage, Dwight D. Eisenhower

is in his second term, and we all liked Ike.

But-- Shh!

You know what? Just skip every other sentence. It's fine.

Alright, class, we're going to continue on with sight words.

Now, who can tell me what this word is?

Oh, come on, don't be shy.

We went through all of these yesterday.

Yes, sweetheart. Uh, I don't remember.

And why would you?

Since flash card review would have been

a part of last night's homework.

Whoo! Jackpot! Yeah!

Melissa, this new policy is killing us.

But you seem to be having a grand old time.

Because I am.

You know what I think what you guys need to do

is you need to turn this whole homework thing

from negative into a positive.

Like turning 3 fun bucks into 16 on Reward Arena.

The sportsbook app? Call it whatever you want.

All I know is I put a little money down,

I do some research, make a few informed decisions,

and-- Bam!-- they give me more money back.

Wait, you're using your real money for this?

But I use it to buy fun bucks.

And then if I log in three days in a row,

they give me four fun bucks for free.

It's like they're paying me to rob 'em.

I think we have made a grave mistake.

We need to bring homework back.

Amen! Yeah, I kinda agree.

You don't even grade it.

Without at-home reading,

I'm needing to cram all of the Apollo missions

into one lesson, and guess what?

That is not the giant leap

Neil Armstrong was talking about.

Mnh-mnh. Without homework,

my students aren't getting the practice they need

for new information to really stick.

I tried to give Ava the benefit of the doubt,

but I looked into it, and no one,

and I do mean no one,

has rolled out a no-homework initiative like this in March.

Well, that's not surprising

because none of this makes sense.

I think we've given it enough time.

And minus Melissa...

Whoo! Jackpot! Hey! Ka-ching!

...we all agree that this is not working

and it is in everyone's best interest, including Ava's,

that she knows it.

I think someone should say something.

Yep. Fine. I will do it. Uh...

No disrespect.

I think we're looking for somebody who--

no disrespect-- Ava would listen to.

No disrespect.

Fine. I'll talk to her. Yeah.

That's what I meant. That's what I meant. Okay.

I don't like those odds. But you know what?

I'm feeling generous. I'll go 2 to 5, Barb.

I'll take that action.

"I heard Crystal's wack weave

affects her ability to principal."

Got her.

Ava, the teachers and I appreciate

your doing something innovative,

but this no-homework thing is proving to be detrimental

to how we do our job.

Seems effective to me.

Now that the students aren't always talking about homework,

maybe we could get a D1 athlete from here.

But it's all so sudden and...

a bit overly ambitious.

I'm as ambitious as any administrator out there.

Are you saying I don't work hard? I didn't say that.

I'm just saying that I don't think

that this is going to work for us.

Oh, it's not going to work for y'all, huh? No.

Will everyone who is a principal at this school,

please raise your hand?

Oh, B-- I notice you don't have your hand up.

That's because you're not the principal.

I'm the principal. You're the teacher.

And no homework is the law of the land.

I'm just sa-- You will just do as I say.

Thanks.

Oh, come on.

Oh, thank you.

How'd it go? Has sanity prevailed?

No homework stays.

Well, what happened?

I mean, did she have any reports on growing pains?

'Cause that's where we are now. No.

I was simply reminded that I am not the principal

and therefore have no say in the matter.

Ava said that to you? Mm-hmm.

I mean, she pulls rank with me all the time, but you?

Are you okay? No, she's not okay.

She's seething.

Look at her. Her pearls are vibrating.

You know, when someone is spoken to in such a manner,

they've got two choices.

One, listen to them.

Two, slap them into last week.

But as a weak-wristed woman of God,

I went with number one.

Barb lost, which means you lost.

Pay up, sister. Yeah. Okay. Sure.

Let me just get my wallet.

Hey, hey! Get back here with my $14.

Catch me!

So, President Lyndon B. Johnson used the Gulf of Tonkin incident

as a justification for escalating the Vietnam War,

a decision that was so unpopular,

he didn't even try to run for re-election.

Silent reading has been cutting into class,

so I am kicking my lessons into a higher gear.

If I go full Busta Rhymes mode,

then we still get time for Socratic discussions.

Johnson underestimated the division the war

would have domestically.

But who won the war?

Well, that is an incredibly nuanced question

that we should really dig into.

Um...

My students are falling behind.

Yeah, they're forgetting how to multiply.

Yeah, mine are falling behind, too.

Without the practice at home, it's just--

Mm, how would you know if you're not grading anything?

This is really bothering you, isn't it?

I barely mentioned it.

You asked me about it last night in your sleep.

Okay.

I love you... very much... Mm-hmm.

Sure. ...but what kind of lunatic just gives out gold stars

like they don't have any weight or any value?

If I'm being completely honest with you,

I don't even like gold stars like that.

If I'm giving out stars, they're probably gonna be blue.

Oh, God! Would you stop?

'Cause I gotta get into a bed with you later.

And right now, I...

Hey, what are you doing on your phone?

'Cause, you know, I can give you any news updates

with little to some bias.

No, I'm checking Cleveland's average strip club rating. Why?

Because if they don't have very high quality clubs,

James Harden's got a better shot at scoring over 25 points.

I'll save you the trouble. They're mid. Very mid.

And if he does, then I win four fun bucks,

and it pays out twice.

That's gambling. It is not.

Jacob, did you not hear what I said?

I am making a sound investment decision

backed by solid data and intel.

This no-homework atrocity has got to end.

My students aren't retaining anything. Same.

You know, Ava's simply wrong about this.

Now, she might have good intentions,

but she is not in these classrooms.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

So, we should do what we need to do.

You got something in your eye?

I'm saying what we do in our classrooms

is our business.

Oh, okay. Right. Yeah.

Just one more time. Just walk it out for me.

Ava doesn't need to know what goes on in our classrooms.

Oh!

Just one more time. We give the kids secret homework.

We give the kids secret homework.

Yes.

As educators, it is on us

to do what is best for our students.

So we've been coming up with creative ways

to get them their homework

because we will not be deterred.

We will not be defeated.

We will do what's right.

Oof! Gave myself goosebumps.

Ms. Teagues, I'm a man of my word,

and I made a promise that if Jabari's grades ever slip,

which I can only assume they have without homework,

that I was gonna come back here

and I was gonna kick Gregory's ass.

Wait, so you mean to tell me that

no matter what grade Jabari is in,

if he falls behind, you're gonna come "beat my ass"?

Yep.

That promise lasts forever.

Okay, look, maybe there is something

that we can do, Darnell. Right?

Jabari, come here, come here, come here.

Okay. Turn around. What is that?

Well, let's just say a little slip of paper

fell from the sky and into Jabari's backpack.

And maybe you can check later when you get home.

Right? Could be a little work.

Are you on drugs?

'Cause I've heard about you.

N-- No. I'm not on dr--

It's secret homework.

Oh.

Oh!

Now, what is this?

It's my... classwork.

This has barbecue sauce on it.

We haven't served chicken nuggets in two weeks.

This work has been in a home.

I found this homework contraband on one of Janine's students.

Who put you up to this? Was it Barbecue Barbara?

Barbecue B--

Barbara didn't put me up to anything.

Look, there's no grand conspiracy to undermine you.

There is, and we're all in on it.

We have been secretly assigning homework.

What is wrong with you?

This is why I get kicked out of all my Signal chats.

If this many teachers felt called

to assign secret homework,

then the initiative must not be working.

Look, we meticulously plan our curriculums

for the entire year.

Yes, and with that planning and a little bit of luck

and a few miracles, we do it.

But you pulled the rug out from under us.

I sat in on a pop quiz in Ms. Washington's class

the other day.

All the students aced their tests.

They've never been happier.

Look, I know a few other schools have tried this,

like Liberty Rings, but--

Crystal Riley doesn't know what she's doing.

Crystal Riley doesn't have a better school than me.

And Crystal Riley did not give up.

It will take some time to adjust, but we'll be fine.

Does this nonsense have anything to do

with your trying to compete with that Crystal Riley?

Why would you say that?

'Cause you said her name three times, unprompted.

That is why we have been traumatized by this experiment?

You're trying to bring down the entire school

just because you're trying to one-up your friend?

That is ridiculous! Yeah!

You are being a bad principal. Whoa!

What did you just say to me?

Why would you do something so selfish?

Let me tell you something.

Okay. Alright, alright. I know you're real angry.

Just be careful about what you're gonna say next.

That was the nod of someone

who was about to say something crazy.

Are you here to apologize?

I am not. I am here to talk further.

Which will end in a "sorry"?

No, because I'm not wrong.

Ava, it has become crystal clear

that you are letting Crystal Riley affect

how you do your job.

She wishes.

What is it about Crystal that gets to you like this?

I don't know.

She's been one-upping me since college.

I get a new shirt. She gets a new wardrobe.

I date a linebacker. She dates a quarterback.

I get a D. She gets an A-plus.

She started making me feel bad about it,

so I started one-upping her back.

Well, this has got to end

because you will not feel good about one-upping her forever.

Wrong. It feels great every time.

And if I stop the no-homework initiative right now,

it'll look like I lost.

Ava, you are not in college anymore.

You are a grown woman.

You've got a man, a wonderful career,

friends and coworkers who appreciate you.

And you're right.

You are the principal.

You make the calls.

The decision is yours.

Homework is back!

Boo!

Okay, maybe that was not the best way

to deliver what is, in fact, good news, okay?

'Cause at least we can all have class discussions again.

We all miss that equally, right?

I hate homework, let's be clear.

But I definitely miss class discussions.

But you just give us so much homework, though, Mr. C.

Okay, so it's not the homework, but the amount?

I guess some homework is good?

Dang, did Mr. C just make us like homework?

Ah, love it. Okay. Alright.

Less homework it is.

But for now, since we missed so much discussion time,

we are going to do a truth zone.

Ask me any question you want--

about the chapter, not my love life, thank you--

and I will give you the real, unvarnished truth

that you will not find in the textbook.

But let's make it a speed round. Rapid-fire. Who's got one?

Henry Ki... Kissinger?

War criminal. Next.

Ooh, ooh! Right here!

Hallelujah!

The students have their homework again.

A welcome return to normalcy.

Yep, my plan worked.

I took it away so you'd appreciate it more.

Look how happy you all are now.

You're welcome.

It's a sky full of stars over there, huh?

You know, Gregory, I really feel--

Feels good, huh?

Yeah. You know what? It really does.

Do me next. Do me next! Yeah.

God!

Oh, I swear to God, if this guy tanks this game,

I'm gonna find his address-- Melissa, you are gambling

in the middle of a school day.

I can't help it when they air cricket, Jacob.

Also, I gamble, and this is not gambling.

Gambling happens in a casino.

I mean, they advertise this app on national TV.

You think they'd do that if it was gambling?

Yes. Well, you're wrong.

Also, I'm playing with house money, so...

Oh, as in "fun bucks"?

No, as in, if I lose this money, I lose my house.

Oh, my God, I've been gambling.

Well, it has been an absolute dream come true

to be with you this evening.

But sadly, all dreams must end.

See you all the week after next.

So, Ava,

how's the no-homework policy going?

Eh, I tried it, but the teachers wanted it back.

And you know what? They were right.

It's too bad you couldn't figure it out.

I admire that, though.

Sometimes good leadership means listening to criticism.

Yeah, I considered the no-homework policy,

but if it didn't work for you, maybe I'll rethink our approach.

Well, Crystal, I'd love to hear how you pulled it off

at Liberty Rings.

How'd you do it without classes falling behind

and test scores dropping?

Oh, that's easy.

The kids were failing,

so we don't do tests anymore. What?

We're a metric-free school now.

No homework, no tests, no grades.

Just vibes.

Hmm.

Metric-free?

Those kids are going nowhere.

Have a good night. Yo!

I saw Jabari got a gold star on his homework.

Mm-hmm. So, we're good, man.

For now.

Did he get taller?

I don't know. It's all the same to me.

And did someone start using the star system?

Well, I get it now.

I'm just happy I don't have a parent coming up here

threatening to beat my ass

anytime their child is struggling. Mm-hmm.

Hey. Hey, so, I heard about my ex threatening Gregory,

and I just wanted you to know you have nothing to worry about.

Darnell will only ever hit Gregory.

He would never hit a woman.

Well, that's progressive. Mm-hmm.

Is it? But don't worry.

If Jabari falls behind,

I'll beat your ass, 'cause we two girls.

Oh, um... Mm-hmm, yes, I got you, girl.

He has a Little League game this afternoon,

so you better pray he wins.

Hi, baby. How was school?

Good. Good?

We're gonna go home and we'll make--

Oh, wait. Get your ball.